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Defending Ourselves: A Guide to Prevention, Self-Defense, and Recovery from Rape
A straightforward approach to handling date rape instructs readers on how to understand the psychological makeup of potential attackers and practice actual defense tactics while offering advice on what to do after a physical assault. Reprint.
216 pages, Paperback
First published December 1, 1994
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About the author
Rosalind Wiseman
18 books275 followersRosalind Wiseman is an internationally recognized expert on children, teens, parenting, bullying, social justice, and ethical leadership.
Wiseman is the author of Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence. Twice a New York Times Bestseller, Queen Bees & Wannabes was the basis for the 2004 movie Mean Girls. Her follow‐up book Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads was released in 2006, and she is a monthly columnist for Family Circle magazine.
Since founding the Empower Program, a national violence‐prevention program, in 1992, Wiseman has gone on to work with tens of thousands of students, educators, parents, counselors, coaches, and administrators to create communities based on the belief that each person has a responsibility to treat themselves and others with dignity. Audiences have included the American School Counselors Association, Capital One, National Education Association, Girl Scouts, Neutrogena, Young Presidents Association, Independent School Associations and the International Chiefs of Police, as well as countless schools throughout the U.S. and abroad.
She is a frequent guest on the Today Show and been profiled in The New York Times, People, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, Washington Post, USA Today, Oprah, Nightline, CNN, Good Morning America, and National Public Radio affiliates throughout the country.
In 2009, Rosalind Wiseman has three publications scheduled for release:
* Her groundbreaking book Queen Bees & Wannabes will be updated with a chapter on younger girls, insights on how technology has impacted kids’ social landscapes, and new commentary from girls and boys;
* The Owning Up Curriculum, a comprehensive social justice program for grades 6‐12, will reflect an ever‐changing adolescent culture, and incorporate new strategies for using media to engage students;
* And a new young adult novel will mark Wiseman’s first foray into fiction. The book follows its 14 year‐old heroine, Charlotte Healey, as she navigates the personal and social challenges of her freshman year of high school.
Wiseman has a Bachelor of Arts in Political Science from Occidental College. She lives in Washington D.C. with her husband and two sons.
Wiseman is the author of Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence. Twice a New York Times Bestseller, Queen Bees & Wannabes was the basis for the 2004 movie Mean Girls. Her follow‐up book Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads was released in 2006, and she is a monthly columnist for Family Circle magazine.
Since founding the Empower Program, a national violence‐prevention program, in 1992, Wiseman has gone on to work with tens of thousands of students, educators, parents, counselors, coaches, and administrators to create communities based on the belief that each person has a responsibility to treat themselves and others with dignity. Audiences have included the American School Counselors Association, Capital One, National Education Association, Girl Scouts, Neutrogena, Young Presidents Association, Independent School Associations and the International Chiefs of Police, as well as countless schools throughout the U.S. and abroad.
She is a frequent guest on the Today Show and been profiled in The New York Times, People, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, Washington Post, USA Today, Oprah, Nightline, CNN, Good Morning America, and National Public Radio affiliates throughout the country.
In 2009, Rosalind Wiseman has three publications scheduled for release:
* Her groundbreaking book Queen Bees & Wannabes will be updated with a chapter on younger girls, insights on how technology has impacted kids’ social landscapes, and new commentary from girls and boys;
* The Owning Up Curriculum, a comprehensive social justice program for grades 6‐12, will reflect an ever‐changing adolescent culture, and incorporate new strategies for using media to engage students;
* And a new young adult novel will mark Wiseman’s first foray into fiction. The book follows its 14 year‐old heroine, Charlotte Healey, as she navigates the personal and social challenges of her freshman year of high school.
Wiseman has a Bachelor of Arts in Political Science from Occidental College. She lives in Washington D.C. with her husband and two sons.
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
October 2, 2019
At various points in the book I was somewhat put off by how it was steeped in patriarchy, but there were also some pretty practical tips. I thought I would rate it higher until the date rape section. There all the talk about victim culture and unintentional nonconsensual sex was pretty bad, but what really got me was that right after pointing out the 1% conviction rate on rapes, said we needed to have sympathy for men's fears of false accusations.
I think it is far more helpful to educate them on the low risks, versus the high frequency of rapes and assaults and the damage they cause. That might have us work more toward solving the bigger problem. No, it's not the only problem, but still.
I think it is far more helpful to educate them on the low risks, versus the high frequency of rapes and assaults and the damage they cause. That might have us work more toward solving the bigger problem. No, it's not the only problem, but still.
October 9, 2023
book very helpful for me and made me have some much needed break through. chapter 6 was really great. despite this some views the authour had were very outdated and had tones of victim blaming which is not the vibe
September 2, 2011
I picked up this book in a bookstore and flipped through it, hoping it could offer some wisdom about rape survival outside of the legal system. Instead, the chapter I opened to argued that "extremist feminists" were ruining any real discourse about rape and that you should take "personal responsibility" (a phrase that has lost real meaning since becoming rightspeak for "caring about others inconveniences me") if you choose to get drunk. It basically said it's not a rapists fault if you send them mixed messages. I'm disturbed that this is not satire, and written by a self-identified feminist.
Then it says there are things we can do to prepare ourselves against rape, by looking for signs? Please! The best kept secret about rape and sexual assault is that only very little of it is caused by nasty, aggressive bros. I've been assaulted by an Eagle Scout, for Christ's sake, because I dared to send him the "mixed message" of having once dated him like 5 years previous. Preventing rape is not about telling women not to get so drunk or send such mixed messages, it's about teaching all people that they are never, ever entitled to another person's body, even if they have had sex with you before, even if you're a really good person so of course what you're doing couldn't be, gasp, RAPE! Yes, yes it is!
The reasons so many rapes go unreported is not because we're afraid of retaliation but because so many rapists are normal men and we know we'll just get embarrassed and ignored by the legal system! Besides, sending someone to prison or being called a liar should not be the only options. For one, how about a society that stops telling drunk girls that they had it coming!
Then it says there are things we can do to prepare ourselves against rape, by looking for signs? Please! The best kept secret about rape and sexual assault is that only very little of it is caused by nasty, aggressive bros. I've been assaulted by an Eagle Scout, for Christ's sake, because I dared to send him the "mixed message" of having once dated him like 5 years previous. Preventing rape is not about telling women not to get so drunk or send such mixed messages, it's about teaching all people that they are never, ever entitled to another person's body, even if they have had sex with you before, even if you're a really good person so of course what you're doing couldn't be, gasp, RAPE! Yes, yes it is!
The reasons so many rapes go unreported is not because we're afraid of retaliation but because so many rapists are normal men and we know we'll just get embarrassed and ignored by the legal system! Besides, sending someone to prison or being called a liar should not be the only options. For one, how about a society that stops telling drunk girls that they had it coming!
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews