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Redefining Normal
Growing up, they didn’t believe they had a future. Together, they are building forever.
Alexis Black persevered through her mother’s death and her father’s imprisonment. And after escaping a long and abusive relationship, the college junior promised her foster parents not to date for at least a year. But when she meets an incoming freshman on the first day of their scholarship program, she feels the world melt away, as though it were only the two of them in the room.
Justin Black lived in abandoned houses before going through the child welfare system. But when he grabs the chance for better opportunities by pursuing higher education, he can’t help but be drawn to a beautiful third-year student. Recognizing a fellow survivor, he cherishes the ease of their deep conversations and her wonderful moments of raw vulnerability that makes him fall hard.
In a stark and wholehearted true story that shares how two individuals on separate paths found each other, Alexis and Justin merge their course into one full of hope and purpose. And hand-in-hand, they learn to communicate effectively and avoid patterns of trauma to intentionally break the cycle of unhealthy behaviors.
Written in an engaging novelistic style, the authors put forward a thoughtful exchange of ideas and personal experiences illustrating how anybody, no matter their backgrounds, can have a life of self-empowerment and joy. Broken down into four sections that cover crucial topics such as “Worthiness” and “Mental Health,” this compelling narrative will help any who are learning to love themselves and want to end the line of toxic relationships.
Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Kids Beat The Odds and Discovering Healing, Happiness, and Love is a page-turning memoir that will open your eyes to possibilities and dreams. If you like honest tales of triumph, refreshing transparency, and resilient faith in God, then you’ll adore Justin Black and Alexis Black’s inspirational autobiography.
This story contains mentions of domestic violence, trauma, sexual assault, and other difficult issues faced on the road to healing.
Alexis Black persevered through her mother’s death and her father’s imprisonment. And after escaping a long and abusive relationship, the college junior promised her foster parents not to date for at least a year. But when she meets an incoming freshman on the first day of their scholarship program, she feels the world melt away, as though it were only the two of them in the room.
Justin Black lived in abandoned houses before going through the child welfare system. But when he grabs the chance for better opportunities by pursuing higher education, he can’t help but be drawn to a beautiful third-year student. Recognizing a fellow survivor, he cherishes the ease of their deep conversations and her wonderful moments of raw vulnerability that makes him fall hard.
In a stark and wholehearted true story that shares how two individuals on separate paths found each other, Alexis and Justin merge their course into one full of hope and purpose. And hand-in-hand, they learn to communicate effectively and avoid patterns of trauma to intentionally break the cycle of unhealthy behaviors.
Written in an engaging novelistic style, the authors put forward a thoughtful exchange of ideas and personal experiences illustrating how anybody, no matter their backgrounds, can have a life of self-empowerment and joy. Broken down into four sections that cover crucial topics such as “Worthiness” and “Mental Health,” this compelling narrative will help any who are learning to love themselves and want to end the line of toxic relationships.
Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Kids Beat The Odds and Discovering Healing, Happiness, and Love is a page-turning memoir that will open your eyes to possibilities and dreams. If you like honest tales of triumph, refreshing transparency, and resilient faith in God, then you’ll adore Justin Black and Alexis Black’s inspirational autobiography.
This story contains mentions of domestic violence, trauma, sexual assault, and other difficult issues faced on the road to healing.
310 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 9, 2020
63 people are currently reading
1011 people want to read
About the author
Justin Black
7 books23 followersJustin Black started Rising Over Societal Expectations (ROSE) Empowerment Group with a vision to close the information gap for today’s generation of Black and Brown youth after his experiences as a Black male in the foster care system.
Born in Detroit, Michigan, Justin studied urban and community development as well as political and economic philosophy in countries such as Rwanda, Uganda, Senegal, and South Korea. In his spare time, Justin loves watching sports and enjoys hot wings. He aspires to challenge and expand the ideologies of how to build prosperous communities through interdependence and entrepreneurship.
https://www.roseempowermentgroup.com
Born in Detroit, Michigan, Justin studied urban and community development as well as political and economic philosophy in countries such as Rwanda, Uganda, Senegal, and South Korea. In his spare time, Justin loves watching sports and enjoys hot wings. He aspires to challenge and expand the ideologies of how to build prosperous communities through interdependence and entrepreneurship.
https://www.roseempowermentgroup.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 137 reviews
December 20, 2020
My oh my! This was a wonderful book. It mined the depths of pain while soaring the mountains of joy.
The real life stories of both of these young people were beyond tragic. Yet, they both found way to overcome through love, trust and affection between one another to become incredibly successful people.
I grew up in the inner city and had friends die from gang battles, I understand a tiny bit of the struggles. I will never understand about being black
Also,I however was never in the foster care system. This book gives all readers a good education in the truths of the foster care system.
Victory is something that should not be held close it should be shared. This Couple does an outstanding job of sharing in the last third of a book when they give marriage advice. They don’t give advice in terms of what you must do but in terms of how this advice can help overcome many of the demons that we all bring to relationships.
This is a very Christian-based, specially the second part and I find it much an honor and a joy to recommend this to everybody.
The real life stories of both of these young people were beyond tragic. Yet, they both found way to overcome through love, trust and affection between one another to become incredibly successful people.
I grew up in the inner city and had friends die from gang battles, I understand a tiny bit of the struggles. I will never understand about being black
Also,I however was never in the foster care system. This book gives all readers a good education in the truths of the foster care system.
Victory is something that should not be held close it should be shared. This Couple does an outstanding job of sharing in the last third of a book when they give marriage advice. They don’t give advice in terms of what you must do but in terms of how this advice can help overcome many of the demons that we all bring to relationships.
This is a very Christian-based, specially the second part and I find it much an honor and a joy to recommend this to everybody.
November 9, 2020
Being a native of Detroit growing up on the east side and making frequent visits to the west side I could clearly visualize just about each location mentioned. The transparency of this book is so revealing. It kept me turning pages even when I clearly needed sleep with my eyes closing I would continue reading just to see what Alexis and Justin was going to do next. Not only will this book help those who may be in a unhealthy relationship I believe it will truly help many to avoid and identify what’s clearly healthy and what’s not. This is an excellent read for all, relationship or not. Five stars!
November 7, 2020
Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Youth Discovered Healing Happiness and Love by Justin and Alexis Black is a powerful, well-told, true story about how they went from struggling foster youth to business owning, college graduates! In the intro, they explain that the purpose of this book is to spread awareness of foster youth in our country and around the world. This book has changed my heart and I assure you it will change yours as well.
Alexis starts her part of the story, telling us how she and Justin met during their freshman orientation as students in the Seita Scholars Program, a college scholarship program for foster kids. She tells us how she has struggled all her life to be loved. Alexis was sexually abused throughout her childhood until 2007 when she entered the foster system. Justin tells us about his struggle to fit in his freshman year at college. His parents were drug addicts and he was sent away with Child Protective Services in 2006.
What I liked most about the book was the way they wrote their story. The story covers emotional and heavy topics such as race, neglect, abuse, religion, and love. Topics like these are hard to cover correctly in media but Mr. and Mrs. Black nailed them. I also loved the emotion they put into the book. The diction and style of writing beautifully assist the ethos. Justin and Alexis organized the book uniquely and lovingly. They went back and forth writing different chapters as they went along. I adored the introduction and dedication of the story. It shows the book was meant for something more than just entertainment.
What I disliked most about the book was there was no quote index in the back of the book. Throughout the story, Justin and Alexis bolded statements that they really wanted to hit home for their readers. I wish there was a catalog in the back of the book that organized them as a takeaway for us.
With the excellent writing and touching story, I am compelled to give Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Youth Discovered Healing Happiness and Love 5 out of 5 stars. There are little to no grammatical errors in the book. I would encourage any adult I know to read it, especially those in early adulthood, and/or wanting to work with foster youth.
Alexis starts her part of the story, telling us how she and Justin met during their freshman orientation as students in the Seita Scholars Program, a college scholarship program for foster kids. She tells us how she has struggled all her life to be loved. Alexis was sexually abused throughout her childhood until 2007 when she entered the foster system. Justin tells us about his struggle to fit in his freshman year at college. His parents were drug addicts and he was sent away with Child Protective Services in 2006.
What I liked most about the book was the way they wrote their story. The story covers emotional and heavy topics such as race, neglect, abuse, religion, and love. Topics like these are hard to cover correctly in media but Mr. and Mrs. Black nailed them. I also loved the emotion they put into the book. The diction and style of writing beautifully assist the ethos. Justin and Alexis organized the book uniquely and lovingly. They went back and forth writing different chapters as they went along. I adored the introduction and dedication of the story. It shows the book was meant for something more than just entertainment.
What I disliked most about the book was there was no quote index in the back of the book. Throughout the story, Justin and Alexis bolded statements that they really wanted to hit home for their readers. I wish there was a catalog in the back of the book that organized them as a takeaway for us.
With the excellent writing and touching story, I am compelled to give Redefining Normal: How Two Foster Youth Discovered Healing Happiness and Love 5 out of 5 stars. There are little to no grammatical errors in the book. I would encourage any adult I know to read it, especially those in early adulthood, and/or wanting to work with foster youth.
November 8, 2020
They say you don’t really know someone until you walk a mile in their shoes.
It is stories like this one that make us realize how true it is.
Looking at the cover, you see a beautiful couple that have found love and happiness together. To echo Justin (one of the authors): you wouldn’t know what they’ve been through just by looking.
Alexis and Justin Black dive deep into their painful and traumatic pasts to bring what they have learned as foster kids - about themselves and life - to the light. How they want to, and have changed to bring them to where they are today, and for us, the readers, to gain knowledge from their experiences that could help us in our own lives, regardless of whether we are foster kids ourselves or not.
This book also gives light to the lives of foster children. It makes you realize there are many circumstances that can lead to becoming a foster child, and how much negative outlook there is for them. This book is going to help change that; this book gives hope and confidence.
I commend Alexis and Justin for being openly raw about their experiences; experiences that can never be easily shared, nor presented in a “pleasant” way.
This book is a must-read.
The organization of the sections, and the switching between individual perspectives of the authors instead of having a third person narrate gives an intimate and vulnerable feel. There are moments that make your stomach turn, or make your heart heavy, and yet also moments of happiness for them both as they reach a better place. From reading stats about foster children, and seeing the examples from how both Alexis and Justin fit and yet also defy those stats in their achievements, there is so much to learn.
It also makes you reflect on how you grew up, and what examples were given to you, about love and many other aspects of life. You think about what was healthy and what was not, and how you can change that in yourself.
I also like how they included verses from the Bible that combat negative stats about foster kids. God loves everyone, no matter who you are or what you’ve been through.
The forewords by both Marcy Pusey and Rob Scheer were both beautiful, and also provides some insight from a foster parent and a former foster kid who became a foster parent themselves. Thank you Marcy and Rob for sharing your thoughts and experiences as well.
It was definitely God’s work in that Marcy and Alexis and Justin were able to connect to bring this book into the world.
As others are saying, this is a much-needed book in today’s world, where voices from places hardly thought of need more light. I look forward to finishing the book!
Thank you Alexis and Justin for sharing your stories with us, for being open, and for helping bring hope to your readers! May God bless you both with lots of happiness, good health, and success!
It is stories like this one that make us realize how true it is.
Looking at the cover, you see a beautiful couple that have found love and happiness together. To echo Justin (one of the authors): you wouldn’t know what they’ve been through just by looking.
Alexis and Justin Black dive deep into their painful and traumatic pasts to bring what they have learned as foster kids - about themselves and life - to the light. How they want to, and have changed to bring them to where they are today, and for us, the readers, to gain knowledge from their experiences that could help us in our own lives, regardless of whether we are foster kids ourselves or not.
This book also gives light to the lives of foster children. It makes you realize there are many circumstances that can lead to becoming a foster child, and how much negative outlook there is for them. This book is going to help change that; this book gives hope and confidence.
I commend Alexis and Justin for being openly raw about their experiences; experiences that can never be easily shared, nor presented in a “pleasant” way.
This book is a must-read.
The organization of the sections, and the switching between individual perspectives of the authors instead of having a third person narrate gives an intimate and vulnerable feel. There are moments that make your stomach turn, or make your heart heavy, and yet also moments of happiness for them both as they reach a better place. From reading stats about foster children, and seeing the examples from how both Alexis and Justin fit and yet also defy those stats in their achievements, there is so much to learn.
It also makes you reflect on how you grew up, and what examples were given to you, about love and many other aspects of life. You think about what was healthy and what was not, and how you can change that in yourself.
I also like how they included verses from the Bible that combat negative stats about foster kids. God loves everyone, no matter who you are or what you’ve been through.
The forewords by both Marcy Pusey and Rob Scheer were both beautiful, and also provides some insight from a foster parent and a former foster kid who became a foster parent themselves. Thank you Marcy and Rob for sharing your thoughts and experiences as well.
It was definitely God’s work in that Marcy and Alexis and Justin were able to connect to bring this book into the world.
As others are saying, this is a much-needed book in today’s world, where voices from places hardly thought of need more light. I look forward to finishing the book!
Thank you Alexis and Justin for sharing your stories with us, for being open, and for helping bring hope to your readers! May God bless you both with lots of happiness, good health, and success!
November 7, 2020
I couldn't put this book down! Grab some snacks, a beverage and some tissues and get ready for a roller coaster ride of emotions ranging from empathy for the abuse these two have endured as children to happiness for their love and the journey they traveled to "redefine normal." Both authors alternate sharing their stories of abuse, pain, trauma, healing and finding true and unconditional love. Their stories intertwine to create a compilation of love and hate, desperation and inspiration, hopelessness and hope and being lost to finding faith. All who have the privilege to experience all of the good, bad and ugly written in this tome will be pleasantly rewarded with all they exude in their stories and where they are now. It is amazing to see two young people overcome so much, and doing it brilliantly in focusing on their education, traveling the world and busting all myths surrounding the statistics and sad outcomes many former foster youth often face when aging out of care. As a former foster youth with a dysfunctional original family, I often found myself mirrored in parts of their stories. I commend them for the courage to speak openly and candidly about their vulnerabilities and how they managed to turn them into the determination they both share in making the world understand the nuances of foster care to independence, being marginalized by society to becoming scholars and from being lost to finding a mutual faith. I highly recommend this book for any child welfare worker, foster/adoptive parent, current/former foster youth or anyone interested in learning more about faith, love, foster care, trauma and, most importantly, how to redefine what we consider "normal" in in our society. As they so poignantly state in this book that hit home with me, "One thing is clear—we all want to be loved, but how we give and receive love is largely dictated by those who taught us what love is in the first place. For those of us who have been traumatized in our youth, we have to redefine ourselves and redefine what is normal." The world, in my opinion, is a better place because this book exists.
November 7, 2020
This book could have had a whole different ending if Alexis and Justin weren't so motivated to make their lives count. Foster care can be dim the prospects of many children -- as can the reasons for why they are removed from their parents' care -- but it can also instill resilience. Alexis and Justin's book show the path to rising above the circumstances of our birth and childhood to attain more than normalcy. As a former foster parent, I can't recommend this book highly enough!
November 8, 2020
A modern, young, interracial, and real-life spiritual romance, this story is as timely as it is timeless. Illustrating the flaws in our foster care system only illuminates the backdrop of our cultural ills - thru very personal narratives and structured by striking statistics. I'm grateful to have this story beside me, today.
November 8, 2020
Such an inspiring couple & story! Definitely worth reading.
January 26, 2021
Do you ever get half way through a book and realize that this one is going to stick with you for a long time? That’s exactly how I felt reading this. Both Alexis and Justin write in such a compelling way, making it incredibly hard to put down. Their stories are, unfortunately, hard to even comprehend, but their personal growth is truly remarkable. Not only do they share their pasts in such a powerful way, but they help you to learn more about the complexities and struggles of foster youth. I don’t think it’s possible to finish this book without feeling inspired by them and inspired to help others.
November 7, 2020
Honestly vulnerable and inspiring!
This book has something that I feel just about anyone can relate to. The amount of trauma that foster youth have experienced should be an inspiration for policy changes and services! It touches on vulnerable occurrences that must have been difficult to share with the world. But it is just as inspiring to see that we can continually grow and learn from our past. These two individuals are very courageous in sharing their story and stepping forth to create positive change!
Amazing book!!!
This book has something that I feel just about anyone can relate to. The amount of trauma that foster youth have experienced should be an inspiration for policy changes and services! It touches on vulnerable occurrences that must have been difficult to share with the world. But it is just as inspiring to see that we can continually grow and learn from our past. These two individuals are very courageous in sharing their story and stepping forth to create positive change!
Amazing book!!!
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November 9, 2020Redefining Normal is an engaging and faced paced read that I recommend for anyone who is interested in understanding the foster youth experience. Justin and Alexis’ authentic stories continuously hit me in the heart. I loved the section themes, and the support of the highlighted statistics and quotes. Bravo to the authors for sharing their experiences and using the platform to encourage a much needed system change.
November 10, 2020
With COVID-19 and national politics dominating the headlines, it can be easy for other societal problems to be left behind. Indeed, the issues, people, and communities that Justin and Alexis Black write about so honestly in Redefining Normal have been consistently neglected even in less turbulent times. At its core, this book is about intergenerational cycles of poverty, abuse, and despair, as well as what it takes to break those cycles. There is also a gripping, recurring paradox that defines the broader message of the authors. Justin and Alexis are exceptional people in their bravery to put painful experiences to print and in their hard earned outcomes, but their experiences are not exceptional for thousands of underprivileged and at-risk youth in the United States. As difficult and gut-wrenching as many of the stories they share are, what is perhaps the most difficult aspect of them is the reminder that these sorts of stories are still so prevalent with so few remedies at hand.
While those aspects of the book are necessary to grapple with, by the time I was done reading I was left with a profound sense of hope and gratitude. It is somewhat cliché to wax poetic about tales of struggle and resilience and motivational messages, but this book is unique in its genre for several reasons. The honesty the authors take about their own shortcomings places them in the category of deeply relatable narrators and not distant figures with unattainable virtues. They similarly grapple with the tensions of changing their behaviors, assumptions, and ultimately lifestyles. While others may have glossed over this transition, it makes up the bulk of the book and we are better served for it. Finally, they don't shy away from talking about their faith, something that can difficult to do but is done with great power and conviction here.
Redefining normal is a must read in my eyes.
While those aspects of the book are necessary to grapple with, by the time I was done reading I was left with a profound sense of hope and gratitude. It is somewhat cliché to wax poetic about tales of struggle and resilience and motivational messages, but this book is unique in its genre for several reasons. The honesty the authors take about their own shortcomings places them in the category of deeply relatable narrators and not distant figures with unattainable virtues. They similarly grapple with the tensions of changing their behaviors, assumptions, and ultimately lifestyles. While others may have glossed over this transition, it makes up the bulk of the book and we are better served for it. Finally, they don't shy away from talking about their faith, something that can difficult to do but is done with great power and conviction here.
Redefining normal is a must read in my eyes.
November 7, 2020
In REDEFINING NORMAL: How Two Foster Kids Beat the Odds and Discovered Healing, Happiness, and Love, Justin and Alexis Black share their journeys in incredibly open and honest ways. Having been let down and abused by family and friends and victimized by the system, they survived and broke the cycle of abuse and neglect. Theirs is not an easy story to read because of the trauma they share. But they are working on not letting that trauma define or control them. The trauma that began their stories doesn’t define them or their journey. They educate us with statistics of children in foster care (which they worked hard to beat—and continue to!) and share the strength they garner from their faith and supportive people who mentor them.
Their words are wise, prophetic and instructional. They address identity, relationships, love, healthy and unhealthy coping strategies, breaking cycles of abuse and neglect, the need to unlearn behaviors and expectations, and grieving what could have been. They invite us to walk along side of them as they work together to heal, overcome, and establish healthy life skills and goals. The toxic and sabotaging behaviors they had do endure didn’t crush them. Because of their exceptional ability to forgive, they are full of hope, joy and expectation. REDEFINING NORMAL is a must read for all—those touched by trauma, those who seek to understand, and those who can support and mentor.
Sheila Henderson, CSW, C-SSWS
November 10, 2020
Part 1, Alexis:
First of all, I can’t tell you how relatable this book is. Just reading the first two sentences alone had me saying “wow” because as a former foster youth, I attended three different high schools during my time in care. I am part of the 65% and it had a tremendous negative affect on my education and anxiety.
When Alexis spoke of her issues with her ex and her cats, I felt her pain. I also have two cats to help cope with my depression and any harm done to them is harm done to me. I felt angry, sad, and helpless. I felt that I was in the story. I can also relate to not seeking help from my foster parents. What most people do not realize is that once you enter care, you are forced to grow up early. That’s just fact. So, seeking out help from the adults in your life hardly cross your mind. And I feel like this is exactly what Alexis is hinting at.
Part 1, Justin:
As humans, we all struggle with our faith and I can totally relate to abandoning my faith in college. I went down a dark path and if it had not been for my best friend, I would not be where I am today. For Justin, Alexis served as the person that kept him in check. For me, it was my best friend. Be it best friend, cousin, brother, or partner, we all need that one person to help us see that what we are doing is sabotaging ourselves.
I am looking forward to completing this book and learning more about Justin and Alexi and how they grew together and overcame some of the most difficult challenges foster youth face. I see myself in this story and it is giving me so much courage to open about my experience. I wish Justin and Alexis the best and please continue to be a voice for those who feel silenced.
First of all, I can’t tell you how relatable this book is. Just reading the first two sentences alone had me saying “wow” because as a former foster youth, I attended three different high schools during my time in care. I am part of the 65% and it had a tremendous negative affect on my education and anxiety.
When Alexis spoke of her issues with her ex and her cats, I felt her pain. I also have two cats to help cope with my depression and any harm done to them is harm done to me. I felt angry, sad, and helpless. I felt that I was in the story. I can also relate to not seeking help from my foster parents. What most people do not realize is that once you enter care, you are forced to grow up early. That’s just fact. So, seeking out help from the adults in your life hardly cross your mind. And I feel like this is exactly what Alexis is hinting at.
Part 1, Justin:
As humans, we all struggle with our faith and I can totally relate to abandoning my faith in college. I went down a dark path and if it had not been for my best friend, I would not be where I am today. For Justin, Alexis served as the person that kept him in check. For me, it was my best friend. Be it best friend, cousin, brother, or partner, we all need that one person to help us see that what we are doing is sabotaging ourselves.
I am looking forward to completing this book and learning more about Justin and Alexi and how they grew together and overcame some of the most difficult challenges foster youth face. I see myself in this story and it is giving me so much courage to open about my experience. I wish Justin and Alexis the best and please continue to be a voice for those who feel silenced.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 9, 2020
Wow, what can I say without this book without giving too many spoilers!!! Redefining Normal by Alexis and Justin Black does just that. This book is a must-read for young adults. As I read it I was talking on an emotional roller coaster. The many stories that Alexis and Justin are are very powerful and insightful. As a current undergraduate student of color about to graduate, I found reading this book at this point in my life was perfect. This book kept me engaged from cover to cover and I found myself unable to set it down. When I completed the story it helped me to see many things in the world from a different view. This book helped to analyze some of my personal realization in my own life.
I highly recommend reading this book if you are anywhere after middle school/high school reading level wise. Being defeated in life is inevitable, but being challenged is optional and Alexis and Justin prove just that. They faced many things growing up but they were able to get through them. This book also includes eye-opening statistics at the start of the book sections and some of these will honestly surprise you.
These days I feel that it is hard to find authors who choose to share their personal, deep sectors and be so vulnerable. This book is amazing I look forward to reading the next book that these authors right. I everyone to read this book as I am sure you will love it as much as I do. Currently, the book has received tons of 5 stars reviews and if I would I would give it more stars! The book is also #1 new release in Family Health on Amazon.
I highly recommend reading this book if you are anywhere after middle school/high school reading level wise. Being defeated in life is inevitable, but being challenged is optional and Alexis and Justin prove just that. They faced many things growing up but they were able to get through them. This book also includes eye-opening statistics at the start of the book sections and some of these will honestly surprise you.
These days I feel that it is hard to find authors who choose to share their personal, deep sectors and be so vulnerable. This book is amazing I look forward to reading the next book that these authors right. I everyone to read this book as I am sure you will love it as much as I do. Currently, the book has received tons of 5 stars reviews and if I would I would give it more stars! The book is also #1 new release in Family Health on Amazon.
November 7, 2020
I think this book is an amazing depiction of a Chinese proverb that says an invisible thread connects those destined to meet, despite the time, place, or circumstances. The thread can be tightened or tangled, but never broken. It's an alluring sharing of details that keeps the reader's attention to learn more about how the adverse childhood experiences were vanquished. Clearly, it is fascinating to see how the authors are able to untangle the thread by beating the odds predicted by societal statistics for youth in foster care. Tightening of the thread happens when the pair have to decide which family to visit for the holidays. This example of authentic truth telling will empower readers to discover the courage to love and trust themselves to review boundaries and manage healthier relationships. Because the couple were able to redefine their normal, the thread of their relationship will never be broken.
November 7, 2020
I love the format of switching between stories of more than one protagonist, reading each’s point of view then seeing how eventually they begin to beautifully weave into one another. Reading this book, you really get a sense of who are the authors and the values important to them as individuals, as a couplet, as friends and family members. Learning about where they are now, they have brought to light issues within our current systems and how you can gain strength from any, even unfortunate, circumstances. They are better people than they were initially raised to believe and the world is better for it.
The inclusion of statistics accompanied by bible verses sheds light not only on issues present in our society, but suggests a new take on internalizing one’s importance and worth, even if you’re not religious.
Simultaneously heartbreaking and inspiring. Anyone studying social work, has ties to the foster care system, or just wants another story you can’t put down - read this book.
The inclusion of statistics accompanied by bible verses sheds light not only on issues present in our society, but suggests a new take on internalizing one’s importance and worth, even if you’re not religious.
Simultaneously heartbreaking and inspiring. Anyone studying social work, has ties to the foster care system, or just wants another story you can’t put down - read this book.
November 7, 2020
Redefining Normal is an enlightening, honest story of two resilient people with all of the odds against them. The authors challenge the reader to break unhealthy patterns by using therapeutic principles. Not only does it encourage taking inventory of your romantic relationships, but it also points to health changes to make within yourself individually. With brilliant psychological themes, Alexis and Justin expose the lasting effects of physical, sexual, emotional, and mental trauma. An honest retelling of their history provides the reader with the chance to get a first hand view of the vicious cycles of abuse and feel a strong and unique empathy you can rarely find anywhere else. Not only does Redefining Normal inspire you to redefine yourself and your trauma, but it changes your worldview to be more inclusive of marginalized and struggling people who are so often judged or misunderstood.
November 8, 2020
This book made me laugh, cry, scream, beam with joy, and contemplate so many different experiences and choices in my life and theirs. Justin and Alexis intricately knit together their stories in a way that shows the differences in their lives as well as the ways they were alike, and ultimately, how those experiences lead them together and lead them to amazing and exceptional places, people, and opportunities.
I think regardless of what the reader has been through, they will find moments of understanding, recognition, and empathy in the pages of this book. This book was written honestly, eloquently, and openly. It was written with such positive intent, self-reflection, and vulnerability and it is truly impactful to read. I know their story is going to continue to positively impact so many people, and I know this because it has greatly impacted me!
If you have the ability to, I strongly recommend adding this to your must-read list!
I think regardless of what the reader has been through, they will find moments of understanding, recognition, and empathy in the pages of this book. This book was written honestly, eloquently, and openly. It was written with such positive intent, self-reflection, and vulnerability and it is truly impactful to read. I know their story is going to continue to positively impact so many people, and I know this because it has greatly impacted me!
If you have the ability to, I strongly recommend adding this to your must-read list!
November 8, 2020
When I started reading this book, I could not have imagined what impact it would have on me. I felt so much pain as both Justin and Alexis (the Authors) narrated their experiences growing up. Having experienced the loss of her mother at a very young age , Alexis moved in with her father who constantly abused her sexually, verbally and physically and this was also true with some of the other close relationships she had.
Against all odds, Justin and Alexis found love and healing from their past hurts.
What I love about this book is how vulnerable and honest the writers are in sharing stories that I’m sure would have been easier to avoid talking about . It’s an amazing book that also highlighted the challenges that children in foster care face and how every child deserves love and affection.
The best part is they defied the odds and show that finding true love and healing is possible for everyone. By far the best book to come out this year. It is inspiring and offers hope.
Against all odds, Justin and Alexis found love and healing from their past hurts.
What I love about this book is how vulnerable and honest the writers are in sharing stories that I’m sure would have been easier to avoid talking about . It’s an amazing book that also highlighted the challenges that children in foster care face and how every child deserves love and affection.
The best part is they defied the odds and show that finding true love and healing is possible for everyone. By far the best book to come out this year. It is inspiring and offers hope.
November 8, 2020
The storytelling of Alexis and Justin are empathic, unnerving, and emotionally raw because they shed light on circumstances too readily known but never authored. This book is an unflinching encounter with the reality of what violence and adversity does, and though this is not a book about despair. Their narratives reveal the depths of hope and profound determination to endured beyond all measures through redefining normal. And as someone who is a foster kid as well, it exposes the aspirations we still hold for the foster care system to be a safe harbour for kids in need. Taking the time to read this book has been eye-opening because those who take the time to absorb the message of the book will leave with a newfound sense of inspiration for the communities of support, the wonders of life, and the value of love and regardless of who you are, everyone has something to learn something redefining normal.
November 7, 2020
I started reading this book not knowing the emotional journey I was about to embark on. While I knew the foster care system was in place, I had never considered the circumstances that would lead to someone entering this type of environment. Justin and Alexis tell their life story, unfiltered. The authentic nature of these stories can be unsettling at times, but is masterfully done to illustrate the obstacles the authors had to overcome. Justin and Alexis back up their experiences with facts and statistics to emphasize that these gut-wrenching stories are not out of the ordinary. Throughout the chapters you develop a rollercoaster of emotions, celebrating the small wins and and feeling the disappointment of a setback. Regardless of who you are and your life experiences, I highly recommend this book to everyone.
November 7, 2020
Redefining New Normal by Justin and Alexis Black ventures into a journey of two determined, secure, tender and loving youngsters, finding their way together, who once used to be vulnerable and feeble in facing obstacles in life. This memoire is heart touching and mind blowing. Their journey together has always been painful as two foster youth. This opens readers to a stark reality.
Every incident is raw and very well portrayed by the authors. The life lessons and messages highlighted are thought provoking. Growing up in unsupportive environments, the two have always had faith in god and themselves to achieve their goals in life. These two inspirational individuals prove the saying, “you need to decide for yourself if you want to become a rare jewel or a common flower”.
I cannot imagine any reader not falling in love with this book. Simply authentic and inspirational!
Every incident is raw and very well portrayed by the authors. The life lessons and messages highlighted are thought provoking. Growing up in unsupportive environments, the two have always had faith in god and themselves to achieve their goals in life. These two inspirational individuals prove the saying, “you need to decide for yourself if you want to become a rare jewel or a common flower”.
I cannot imagine any reader not falling in love with this book. Simply authentic and inspirational!
November 9, 2020
Foster kids overcoming adversities!!
This is a great book for outlining steps to overcoming adversities. This book accurately captures the traumatic events of two foster kids and the emotional struggles in the present day foster system. Gave me a better understanding on how childhood abuse can change one's future interaction and how hard it is to restore trust to victims of childhood abuse. Additionally, this book helps in becoming trauma informed and provides insight into the experiences, effects, and complexity of individuals who have a history of trauma.
Last and perhaps greatest of them all, I like how through out the text both authors emphasize on their past experiences and vulnerabilities. I also just like how the book is set up, the authors both devoted chapters to certain parts of their lives and the book is easier to follow! Highly recommend it!!!!!
This is a great book for outlining steps to overcoming adversities. This book accurately captures the traumatic events of two foster kids and the emotional struggles in the present day foster system. Gave me a better understanding on how childhood abuse can change one's future interaction and how hard it is to restore trust to victims of childhood abuse. Additionally, this book helps in becoming trauma informed and provides insight into the experiences, effects, and complexity of individuals who have a history of trauma.
Last and perhaps greatest of them all, I like how through out the text both authors emphasize on their past experiences and vulnerabilities. I also just like how the book is set up, the authors both devoted chapters to certain parts of their lives and the book is easier to follow! Highly recommend it!!!!!
November 8, 2020
Redefining normal was a roller coaster of emotions. The authors truly took us an adventure as we follow their stories through perseverance, growth, and re-definition.
I studied substance abuse counseling with the hopes of one day using my abilities to help kids in foster care. With this being said, I have experience, & research in this field. This book was statistically accurate .
Foster care is a very broken system that has failed millions of children in this country. The system failed Alexis and Justin but they overcame the odds unlike many others. By reading this book I now feel like I have a better understanding of what kids in the system are forced to overcome. I think that every foster parent should read this book before they become foster parents.
I studied substance abuse counseling with the hopes of one day using my abilities to help kids in foster care. With this being said, I have experience, & research in this field. This book was statistically accurate .
Foster care is a very broken system that has failed millions of children in this country. The system failed Alexis and Justin but they overcame the odds unlike many others. By reading this book I now feel like I have a better understanding of what kids in the system are forced to overcome. I think that every foster parent should read this book before they become foster parents.
November 8, 2020
Having had no previous knowledge of foster youth and the foster system, reading the story of Alexis and Justin through “Redefining Normal” is inspiring. Their experiences of adversity and trauma, and how they overcame these challenges, were illuminating. Alexis’s and Justin’s respective stories brought both laughter and tears. I have newfound knowledge of the foster care system after having read this book. Justin and Alexis challenge stereotypes about foster youth, overcoming great pain to achieve their goals. I commend them for putting pen to paper in order to share their collective experiences and hope that their story inspires others. A must read for social workers, teachers, or anyone working with children battling trauma!
November 6, 2020
This book embodies authenticity! Justin and Alexis truly embodied what it means to be true to their story and sticking to it!! It takes a lot to own up to your past pain in your private life, but to write a book that the world will see; to publicly share the most vulnerable parts of your story, takes another level of strength that you don't see in a lot of young adults today. I commend the authors for sharing their stories. There are young adults and teenagers that have experienced life's trauma and have not seen hope. When they read this book I believe that they will be elevated, empowered, and encouraged to redefine what is normal within their lives and know that there is hope for their stories.
November 7, 2020
Justin and Alexis do a great job of providing an eye opening account of the experiences they had as children that could’ve easily defined their lives. However, they persevered through the challenges to break the cycle and use their experiences as a source of strength. Their writing takes readers on an emotional journey but provides hope and a positive message. As a teacher, the story provides an opportunity for me to be reminded of the untold stories and experiences my students may bring into my classroom. Thank you for being vulnerable and allowing us a glimpse into your lives. Wishing you the best of luck as you continue redefining normal!
November 7, 2020
I can’t begin to express how much I love this book. The raw emotion and honesty you get from the authors is incredibly moving and inspirational. Not only that, but it’s educational as well, showing how growing up in the foster system can affect youth in so many different ways. I was passionate about advocating for foster youth before reading this book, but after reading that small spark of passion has turned into a roaring fire. Thank you Alexis & Justin for sharing such an open and inspirational story.
November 7, 2020
What is unique about Redefining Normal is that it comes from two young people, with samll experience in life, with a big desire of sharing how they have overcome all the obstacles in their lives to help others.
What attracted me the most is the honesty of the writer and their courage of going through memories they want to forget.
How Alexis and Justin fought the Odds and became the best of themselves is so inspiring.
I am so greartful for reading this bokk because their is so much hope in this book.
What attracted me the most is the honesty of the writer and their courage of going through memories they want to forget.
How Alexis and Justin fought the Odds and became the best of themselves is so inspiring.
I am so greartful for reading this bokk because their is so much hope in this book.
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