Ouch

by Pug Grumble

Sylvester's got a bit of a thing for pain. In the silliest of ways, he enjoys it. He likes splinters and stubbed toes, pizza burns and ice cream headaches.

He’s dating the perfect girl in Felicia, a sadistic siren who torments any who wander within reach. The kinda girl who sharpens doorknobs and electrifies jukeboxes.

But when Felicia goes to jail, Sylvester can’t help but run into Natalie, a colossal klutz who topples into everything. The kinda girl who twists her ankle on the toilet and gets injured by plastic reindeer.

It's the start of something fun, until Felicia gets out of prison.

If you enjoy a quirky and funny bit of literary fiction along the lines of A MAN CALLED OVE by Fredrik Backman, THE FINER POINTS OF SAUSAGE DOGS by Alexander McCall Smith, FIGHT CLUB by Chuck Palahniuk, or THE OCEAN AT THE END OF THE LANE by Neil Gaiman (or if you enjoy narcoleptic porcupines and deep-fried pancake bars), then this could be the book for you.

Genres: Fiction, Humor

240 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 17, 2020

About the author

PUG GRUMBLE may or may not be a pen name.

Pug went to school, learned things, and held many unfulfilling jobs (the best was at a maple syrup bottle factory).

One day, Pug started drawing a comic. That comic became Farlaine the Goblin (farlaine.com), an all-ages series about a wandering tree goblin shaman trying to find a forest of his own.

He then wrote a novel called Ouch, a comical and quirky love story between a masochist, a sadist, and a klutz. It's dark, but funny.

Pug's next comic is a hard science-fiction story about snack food. His next novel is going to be a murder mystery about t-shirts.

Pug dreams of living in Saratoga Springs on a pug farm, going on long dog walks, drinking a lot of coffee, eating delicious croissants, and writing and drawing the fun adventures of pug goblins and popcorn cowboys.

Reviews

[Hail Hydra! ~Dave Anderson~]

He glanced over at Natalie and saw her smiling apologetically, her arm extended to help an elderly gentleman extract himself from the snowdrift she'd just knocked him into. Life was somehow different with Natalie. Simpler. Happier. “Ready?” she asked as she appeared again next to him, her eyes dancing with adventurous potential. Sylvester nodded. Then she lost her balance and shoved him into a fire hydrant.

[Amanda Sexton]

I won this book from a Goodreads giveaway.

When I saw this ebook pop up in my Kindle app, I really wondered why I had entered to win it. The title, “A Comical & Quirky Tale about a Masochist, a Sadist, and a Klutz”, seriously weirded me out.

While I don’t understand people’s oddities and foibles, the author has mastered getting inside his characters’ heads, bringing humor to the reader. It ends up being a sweet love story in a very weird plot. The characters become bigger than their written personalities, and by the end, I couldn’t put the book down (ignore the fact that I started the book over two weeks ago, the holidays kept me overly busy....under normal circumstances, I would have easily finished the book in less than 48 hours). There are a couple of passages where I physically cringed, the description creating mental pictures of the pain being experienced, but looking back, it feels like it was just another method the author used to bring the reader into the world he had created. There are also many laugh out loud moments, and sweet sections to offset the weird, painful ones.

For the reader who likes a look inside people’s brains, who likes to know the ‘reason why’, who indulges in zany reality tv, this is a book you will appreciate....seriously.

On another note, the author is a master wordsmith! The entire book is filled with beautifully turned phrases and word pictures. For example, how amazing is this quote from the book, “Felicia shrugged in disagreement as a vapid elephant of awkward silence sat down at the table with them.”, and, “He stepped around the corner and found himself trapped in a small wooden zoo of old-world fantasies, as Greek and Roman myths were carved into the crenels and leered down at him suspiciously.”

The author writes under a pen name, and apparently has only created comic/graphic novel type books under this name prior to the printing of this book, but I hope he continues in his journey as a novel writer.

[Jillian Armistead]

Quirky and fun

I won this book in a Goodreads giveaway. This book took me a while to get into because I couldn’t relate to any of the characters. I’m not sure if that has ever happened before. But, the book was so quirky and fun that it didn’t matter.
I loved the way the author used language- inventing new words and using existing words in new ways. The story itself was simple but there were some complex themes embedded in the simple story structure. Plenty of word pictures that offer clues of deeper emotions such as the klutzy girl wearing the pangolin eating pancakes shirt when she clearly missed her friend that she was avoiding.
I would recommend this book to others in search of something a little different but quirky, fun and comical.

[Erica Scialdone]

Well that was unexpectedly and pleasantly different. Interesting and curious plot, ups and downs, humor, and some darn fine word wending. The characters are like those oddish people you see around and wonder about what their life is like. Refreshingly unlike most everything else.

[Beverly]

I won an advanced reading Copy through Goodreads. This book is seriously laugh out loud funny. This book is about a guy who enjoys pain which his girl friend is very willing to give until she goes to prison. I will not elaborate more as I don’t want to give away the story line. If you want a quick witty book put this on your list. It will give some you laugh out loud moments. Fun read.

[Rhonda A.]

Romance meets Masochist meets Torment

This is a wildly quirky story that is so weird, you have to finish the book to see how the three main characters survive to tell the story.
Some of the story is wildly imaginative and seemingly improbable, but then again I’ve not met a narcoleptic porcupine.... so who am I to judge?

[Liz]

Mixed feelings about this book. Well written with lots of funny moments but just a little too bizarre for my tastes. However, I'm thinking that I might want to give this author another chance.
I won a copy of this book in a Goodreads giveaway for this honest review.

[Deborah]

I enjoyed this bit of "fantasy" trivia. Odd quirky characters, but fully engaging.

[Karen ReadsALot]

Thank you for another Goodreads Giveaway. 3.5 Weirdly wacky and wonderful! Creepy compulsions confusingly creative. Read at your own risk.

[Mary]

Throughly enjoyed the storyline and read

[Aurore Labenheim]

Very unexpectedly enjoyed this!

[Jeff]

Definitely a quirky tale.

This was a fun read. It started slow but once you get the feel of the characters it became a hard one to put down

[mardyth heenan]

I enjoyed reading something light and funny. The characters were all funny in there own way.

[Les]

Imagine a story that's a fairy tale, but with the sensibility of the Three Stooges or Roadrunner and the coyote. The first 30% of the book was a little tough to get through. The sadism and masochism were predominant from the start and sometimes a bit overwhelming. Fortunately, the writing is so good that I was able to get through my discomfort. Then the story changed. The proclivities of the main characters seemed to fade to the background and the interpersonal relationships became the main focus.

The writing is engaging, funny and smart. Although I read it as a Kindle Unlimited book, I liked it enough that I purchased a copy to support the author.

[April]

I received this book for free.
Let me first say that I actually really enjoyed reading this. It was completely ridiculous and impossible but an extremely fun read.
I would recommend this to anyone who likes quirky, silly, and quick reads.

[Jeanie Gerstein]

Despite subject matter surprisingly well written first novel with some truly memorable scenes.

[Joelle Willis]

I received this book from Goodreads as a giveaway. It's a humorous fantasy treatment of S&M that studiously avoids the darker reasons for such a relationship, and sticks to the surface elements of pleasure from inflicting and receiving pain. The writing was brisk and lively, very enjoyable to read with clever turns of phrase on every page. As the story unfolded in my mind's eye, it was like watching a cartoon for grown-ups. Nonetheless, the characters had enough depth and complexity to keep me interested until the end.

[Kellie]

An unexpected little gem. With the exception of Felicia (she was a bit of a bitch) all the characters were great and I really enjoyed them all. Everything was so ridiculous, but that's what made it fun. I had hoped the big ZAP at the end would have done more to solve their issues rather than the switcheroo that it was (I hate thinking of sweet, klutzy Natalie having that mean streak) but other than that a page-turning enjoyable read. I wouldn't mind reading more about these characters. I mean, who wouldn't love a narcoleptic porcupine??

[Claudette Bigby]

I'm a klutz too

I enjoyed reading this strange tale. Though never to have known a sadist or a masochist, and being a bit of a klutz myself this story was as promised, funny all the way through but dark. I was so thrilled that Felicia got what was coming to her & Sylvester got to share Natalie's look & physical feel of the world about them!🤗 On a final note, I want a pet porcupine🤓

[Beth]

Actually...Adorable???

I downloaded this to my kindle because it just looked a bit different. And it was. At first the story was slow, but as it got going and you got to know the characters and their quirks, I can honestly say that this was one of the best stories I have read in a long time. And I can honestly describe it as adorable--and I think I want a narcoleptic porcupine too.

[Jessica]

Honestly, most of the book I was quivering between a 2 and 3. What made me continue the book was: I was glad the main character wasn't a total jerk. I was glad relationships (as weird as these were) were adressed in a respectful manner. I was glad with the ending, which is hard with books.

I'd recommend to anyone looking for something quirky. Fast page turner.

[Jennie]

This book is full of oddities and strange addictions. It is a rather simple read, but the first third of it was challenging to get into. It did picked up though and finished well. There are some underlying concepts as to the way relationships develop and exist. Otherwise, readers who are intrigued by masochism and sadism would find this book as a teaser into such lifestyles and may relate more.

[Brianna]

I was entirely more intrigued by the cover and the synopsis than I was by the actual book. I kept trying to keep an open mind but found myself repeatedly wishing the book was over already. Couldn't seem to relate to any of the characters and also didn't feel compelled to even bother trying to.

[gojenn]

A treasure of accidents

Once you accept the premise of the sadist, masochist and klutz, this is a fascinating story of self-examination and learning how to scratch life's itches. I found myself loving the characters & rooting for their survival.

[Chelsea]

An ok book with characters who felt a little flat or uninteresting at times or maybe more outlandish and unbelievable.

[Sharyn]

I could not finish this book. Pain is not a theme I enjoy.

[James W. Workman]

Wasted effort

Stuck through to the end, but it was a wasted effort Not worth reading; poor writing, dismal’plot’, arcane use of CD language

[Bjorn]

quirky is correct

I’m not sure what I feel about it. I did enjoy the sense of place but the characters never really connected with me. It wasn’t so much funny and just weird.

[Anthony Messina]

Weird but amusing

One of the weirdest books I've ever read but oddly amusing. Not really sure of how else to explain it.

[Elena Pellegrino]

One of the most original and creative books I’ve read. The author did an excellent job keeping me engaged and describing the story in the most unexpected, amusing and quirky ways. Weird and fun.