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Dear Dory: Journal of a Soon-to-be First-time Dad
Imagine discovering you're about to become a parent, even though doctors told you the chances of making a baby were close to zero.
Now, a soon-to-be first-time father is charting a course through the perilous and choppy waters of living with a pregnant woman. He's dodging hormonal right hooks, evading emotional explosions, saying all the wrong things (like 'Are you okay?') and trying to figure out how the hell you install a car seat.
Written as a journal to his unborn child, Dear Dory is the unfiltered, irreverently funny, honest and heartfelt account of one man's journey to fatherhood as he contemplates his new identity as a Daddy and prepares for the responsibility of a lifetime.
WARNING: This book contains a truckload of profanity.
Now, a soon-to-be first-time father is charting a course through the perilous and choppy waters of living with a pregnant woman. He's dodging hormonal right hooks, evading emotional explosions, saying all the wrong things (like 'Are you okay?') and trying to figure out how the hell you install a car seat.
Written as a journal to his unborn child, Dear Dory is the unfiltered, irreverently funny, honest and heartfelt account of one man's journey to fatherhood as he contemplates his new identity as a Daddy and prepares for the responsibility of a lifetime.
WARNING: This book contains a truckload of profanity.
306 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 3, 2020
3 people are currently reading
9 people want to read
About the author
Tom Kreffer
7 books7 followersTom Kreffer has a degree in film and television and has worked in finance for over ten years. Dear Dory is his first book.
He lives in Northampton, England with his family, whom he intends to exploit for many more story opportunities in the years to come.
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He lives in Northampton, England with his family, whom he intends to exploit for many more story opportunities in the years to come.
Amazon: Say Hi
Facebook: Say Hi
Instagram: Say Hi
Twitter: Say Hi
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
January 19, 2021
I will go out on a limb and say that this is not typical of the type of book I would normally pick up - I have a huge penchant for history and its related memoir genre. However, this book, offered by the author, Tom Kreffer, was a blast!
It is one man's documenting of his personal perspective of the events from the discovery to the leading up to that all important delivery date and his own impending fatherhood. It is written by a man for his child -- it covers the highs and lows of living with a pregnant woman - and many men will find a kinship with Tom in this - how he got away with much contained therein with his manhood still intact is a miracle!.
The diary style entries are humourous, satirical, reflective, refreshing, and heartfelt. Tom recounts his fear, joys, relief as both he and his wife travel the much worn path of scans, appointments, false alarms, "to tell or not to tell" family and friends, baby expos, mood swings (and the appearance of what Tom refers to as "Miss Heidi"). And as Tom reflects ... "... this pregnancy stuff is fucking nuts! .."
Just keep swimming, Dory! How I loved that name! I do hope Tom continues to use it as a nickname for the young squib when they arrive!
This is a must read for every prospective parent - and those already with children will no doubt be sagely nodding their heads amid bursts of laughter and self-recognition!
It is one man's documenting of his personal perspective of the events from the discovery to the leading up to that all important delivery date and his own impending fatherhood. It is written by a man for his child -- it covers the highs and lows of living with a pregnant woman - and many men will find a kinship with Tom in this - how he got away with much contained therein with his manhood still intact is a miracle!.
The diary style entries are humourous, satirical, reflective, refreshing, and heartfelt. Tom recounts his fear, joys, relief as both he and his wife travel the much worn path of scans, appointments, false alarms, "to tell or not to tell" family and friends, baby expos, mood swings (and the appearance of what Tom refers to as "Miss Heidi"). And as Tom reflects ... "... this pregnancy stuff is fucking nuts! .."
Just keep swimming, Dory! How I loved that name! I do hope Tom continues to use it as a nickname for the young squib when they arrive!
This is a must read for every prospective parent - and those already with children will no doubt be sagely nodding their heads amid bursts of laughter and self-recognition!
November 10, 2020
Joining Tom on his journey from finding out to becoming a dad is a decision worth making, it’s a fun and heartfelt insight into a life changing 9 months.
I was surprised by the unapologetic honesty; it was genuine and sometimes quite personal but never off putting.
You’ll be able to relate easily if you’re a parent as you’ve no doubt experienced similarities but also too if you’re a soon to be parent or even if you’re not at that stage yet, I found myself being informed and entertained whilst having questions I didn’t know I wanted to know answered.
Not only is it laugh out loud funny but you’ll find yourself smiling throughout, his optimism and positivity are infectious and the want for betterment not only for himself but for the world Dory will experience is endearing.
Definitely worth your time.
I was surprised by the unapologetic honesty; it was genuine and sometimes quite personal but never off putting.
You’ll be able to relate easily if you’re a parent as you’ve no doubt experienced similarities but also too if you’re a soon to be parent or even if you’re not at that stage yet, I found myself being informed and entertained whilst having questions I didn’t know I wanted to know answered.
Not only is it laugh out loud funny but you’ll find yourself smiling throughout, his optimism and positivity are infectious and the want for betterment not only for himself but for the world Dory will experience is endearing.
Definitely worth your time.
September 18, 2021
Sacha's Book Reviews Blog
This was my ninth book I chose via the Reedsy Discovery program, for which I am the single approved reviewer for this new book. This review also appears on Reedsy.
If you're interested in becoming a Reedsy reviewer (and have the chance to get paid "tips" to review books!) check it out here.
The Premise
After being told the chances of a natural pregnancy are close to zero, the author is shocked when the pregnancy test comes back positive. He begins writing a journal as if to his unborn child (never mind the profanity!) detailing his emotional rollercoaster journey with his partner, and his day-to-day musings as he contemplates his new identity as a father (among other things). The journal eventually turns into the irreverent, hilarious look at pregnancy from a father’s perspective.
The Pros
Despite my tastes as a reader, as a reviewer, I usually steer clear of anything factual or personal as it’s hard to give a fair shake at what is or was actually someone’s life. Yet the preview of this novel, classed under “Biographies & Memoirs” (a category I also avoid like the plague it often can be), drew me in with its droll, uniquely British humour — and fortunately, I was not disappointed; it kept me thoroughly entertained.
Uproariously funny from beginning to end, “Dear Dory” follows a man’s coming-of-age journey into fatherhood. From the moment the stick turns blue, our Daddy-to-be veers from exuberant joy to panic:
You will be loved unconditionally and parenting you will be our greatest privilege. A challenge, yes, but a privilege — and a joy. But then comes fear. You might have instantly become our most valued possession, but you’re also our most vulnerable one.
Finding solace in journaling his thoughts, the author makes us smile all the way through as he cringes from the hormonal swings of his partner:
Who is this monster, Dory, and what has it done with your Mummy?
…And right on the heels of that, comes a dark shock wave:
I had a dream that Mummy had a miscarriage… I daren’t tell Mummy. I spare a thought for all the other parents out there who don’t get to wake up from the dream, because it’s not a dream, it’s a reality.
The relationship truly gives the novel its identity and a depth that warms the soul. It is evident that they love each other deeply, and though the book is about “Daddy”, we fall in love with “Mummy” as well (particularly when “Daddy” is having one of the moments when she’s reconsidering her choice of partner!)
This was not just about fatherhood, but also a coming-of-age tale into manhood as he considered financial rejigging responsibilities; the challenges of perhaps parenting a special needs child; the changing generational politics of parenting; and identity as a concept that is forever in flux — one may identify as a parent first, but there are so many more roles that still need nurturing to retain one’s sense of self.
Beneath all these ups and downs, he highlights that while mothers go through so much to bring a child into the world, and he has the utmost respect for them (and their carers), still — and this is the message that stays with us:
You have to understand how crazy this whole child-growing business is from a soon-to-be father’s perspective as well.
Conclusion
As a new-ish mother myself, I had a great appreciation for this story that touched on many nuances of pregnancy that felt so familiar. There is a particular craft of a writer to interweave such profundity nestled in the novel's overarching humour, and I enjoyed the entire journey. I would highly recommend to any adult reader, especially to those who have already experienced the joy and terror of parenting, or who are now beginning their journey. The journey is a long, arduous one, so hats off to anyone who is going through it now!
___________
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June 8, 2021
The Review
This is such a fantastic and honest read. The author brilliantly delves into the raw and honest emotions that run through an impending father’s mind throughout the course of a nine-month pregnancy. From the rush of nerves and fear of hoping when facing a pregnancy test to the changing health conditions of your pregnant wife, including her low iron levels, and the challenge of finding the right remedy to help their exhaustion, the author covers a wide range of both physical and mental (along with emotional) experiences throughout pregnancy both for his wife and himself.
The tone and the pacing of this book are what really stand out to me. The author’s truthful and humorous approach to the subject of fatherhood really makes this narrative relatable, and the fact the author promises that the book is not a must-follow guide on all things parenting, but instead an honest conversation on the author’s personal experiences throughout the pregnancy and looking ahead to fatherhood. Both parents and impending parents will be able to relate to the author’s story, as it is refreshing to see a father who not only seeks answers and hope for parenting but exudes a sense of optimism in his writing about fatherhood.
The Verdict
A heartwarming, engaging, and eye-opening read for any father, parent, or future parent, author Tom Kieffer's “Dear Dory” is a must-read book on parenthood. The humor and wit the author infuses into his writing balances the honesty and hope that the author brings to the subject matter, and makes this a valuable as well as entertaining read that should not be missed. Be sure to grab your copy today!
This is such a fantastic and honest read. The author brilliantly delves into the raw and honest emotions that run through an impending father’s mind throughout the course of a nine-month pregnancy. From the rush of nerves and fear of hoping when facing a pregnancy test to the changing health conditions of your pregnant wife, including her low iron levels, and the challenge of finding the right remedy to help their exhaustion, the author covers a wide range of both physical and mental (along with emotional) experiences throughout pregnancy both for his wife and himself.
The tone and the pacing of this book are what really stand out to me. The author’s truthful and humorous approach to the subject of fatherhood really makes this narrative relatable, and the fact the author promises that the book is not a must-follow guide on all things parenting, but instead an honest conversation on the author’s personal experiences throughout the pregnancy and looking ahead to fatherhood. Both parents and impending parents will be able to relate to the author’s story, as it is refreshing to see a father who not only seeks answers and hope for parenting but exudes a sense of optimism in his writing about fatherhood.
The Verdict
A heartwarming, engaging, and eye-opening read for any father, parent, or future parent, author Tom Kieffer's “Dear Dory” is a must-read book on parenthood. The humor and wit the author infuses into his writing balances the honesty and hope that the author brings to the subject matter, and makes this a valuable as well as entertaining read that should not be missed. Be sure to grab your copy today!
January 25, 2021
Wow!! As a first-time-soon-to-be-father, I can genuinely say that this has been the most uplifting and genuine piece of literature to read in the run-up to imminent parenthood! I have read / listened the traditional (numerous!) 'how-to-a-parent' books - all shared in abundance with me from friends and family. This just hits the nail on the head because it's so genuine, unfiltered and hilariously true! I can relate to so many of these experiences, fears, excitements and all other A-Z emotions under the Sun! A great great book for fathers and mothers to be! 100% recommended and will be purchasing as a prize gift for my pals for the years ahead! Epic, witty and unpretentious - nailed it! Anand
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December 6, 2020If I had to use just one word to describe this book it would be "genuine".
But as I'm not limited to just one word I can say genuinely insightful, genuinely funny and genuinely honest.
The author described the range of emotions experienced so well, I both laughed and cried at points.
Pregnancy and childbirth are a miracle of the female body yet the father is often only credited for the "few minutes of work" it took to create the baby .
This book shows how passionate 21st century dads really are about becoming fathers.
A great read for parents to be or those that have already had kids.
But as I'm not limited to just one word I can say genuinely insightful, genuinely funny and genuinely honest.
The author described the range of emotions experienced so well, I both laughed and cried at points.
Pregnancy and childbirth are a miracle of the female body yet the father is often only credited for the "few minutes of work" it took to create the baby .
This book shows how passionate 21st century dads really are about becoming fathers.
A great read for parents to be or those that have already had kids.
January 20, 2021
Such an entertaining laugh out loud book! I enjoyed every second and just can't wait to see more from Tom. HIGHLY recommend ❤
July 29, 2021
If you’re looking for a hilarious, heart-warming and life-affirming read to take your mind off the current state of the world, you really need look no further than Dear Dory. While I am nowhere near becoming a parent myself, I really loved this account of Tom Kreffer’s journey into becoming a first-time parent and the ups and downs of pregnancy. The majority of the books I’ve seen on this topic focus exclusively on the female perspective, so hearing from a soon-to-be father’s side of things was a really refreshing change, and I really did feel as if I was on the journey alongside Tom and his partner.
Whether or not you are a parent yourself or expecting a child of your own, there is plenty to enjoy within Tom’s warm and witty writing style. As he takes us through the ups and downs of those life-altering nine months, from the pregnancy test to the heath worries of his partner and the nerves and worries that accompany it all, Tom provides a truly personal and relatable conversation into what it means to be a parent in today’s world.
Not a guidebook or parenting manual by any means but instead a raw insight into the thoughts, feelings and worries of a first-time dad, this was an absolute joy to read. I guarantee it will have you laughing out loud in places, but will leave you with plenty to think about, too. I really hope we have more of Tom’s writing to look forward to in the future – if Dear Dory is anything to go by then I’m sure the antics of his little one will be just as hilarious!
Whether or not you are a parent yourself or expecting a child of your own, there is plenty to enjoy within Tom’s warm and witty writing style. As he takes us through the ups and downs of those life-altering nine months, from the pregnancy test to the heath worries of his partner and the nerves and worries that accompany it all, Tom provides a truly personal and relatable conversation into what it means to be a parent in today’s world.
Not a guidebook or parenting manual by any means but instead a raw insight into the thoughts, feelings and worries of a first-time dad, this was an absolute joy to read. I guarantee it will have you laughing out loud in places, but will leave you with plenty to think about, too. I really hope we have more of Tom’s writing to look forward to in the future – if Dear Dory is anything to go by then I’m sure the antics of his little one will be just as hilarious!
June 18, 2022
I met Tom at the baby show and as someone who's never been into books or reading anything like this I was very hesitant but I decided to give it a go as a soon to be first time dad and I'm so glad I did this book is a absolute rollercoaster but one that makes you wanting more also makes you realise that the thoughts and feelings your having is completely normal Can't wait to get started on dear arlo.
October 24, 2022
I loved this book particularly because of the frank and honest approach to becoming a Father - the observations are funny but at the same time grounding - it is quite rare to receive the observations of a Dad to be; thankyou Tom.
November 30, 2020
Excellent debut
Very enjoyable insight into the mind of a expecting father as he journeys into the unknown, highly recommended giving it a read!
Very enjoyable insight into the mind of a expecting father as he journeys into the unknown, highly recommended giving it a read!
March 23, 2023
This is hilarious. It's brilliant to hear the experiences from a dad's point of view. From raw emotion to the maturity of a 5 year old, this transcends its writers' circumstances and helped me to laugh again during a dark time. Can't wait to read the next one.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews