Being Amani

by Annabelle Steele

It's been over a year since that night and Amani hopes that starting all over again will help her move on from the past. So, when she moves to a new city, Amani wants to focus on her new life, her best friends and the boy she's been crushing on but everything is falling apart and Amani finds herself looking for happiness in all the wrong places. Can Amani confront the ghosts of her pasts so she can become the girl she's always wanted to be?

*Contains sensitive issues that some may find triggering.

Genres: Young Adult

256 pages, Paperback

First published May 20, 2021

Reviews

[Alex Nonymous · Rating 2 out of 5]

Thanks to the publisher for providing an eARC of Being Amani in exchange for an honest review.

Before this book is published, I really hope either the cover's changed, trigger warnings are added, or more information is added to the synopsis because while Being Amani hints at a dark event in Amani's past, the vagueness used to address it and the bright smiley cover do not prepare readers to be thrown in to a story about abuse, panic attacks, and suicide.

Being Amani clearly comes from a place of good intent and tries to tackle a lot of really important topics, but the narration just really felt underdeveloped which I can sometimes over look but it really didn't work with how heavy the subject matter was. Amani's voice and the voices of everyone around her consistently felt fake or underdeveloped which really hurt any intended impact Stelle was going for here.

[Laura · Rating 1 out of 5]

The idea for this story sounded good. The topics (TW) covered included domestic violence, mental health and suicide. Unfortunately, I found the execution not good. I had the feeling that the subjects jumped from one to the other, so that the story did not come out well. In addition, I was very annoyed by the writing style. I felt like this was written for a very young audience and at the same time I got a lot of Watpadd vibes. It's a pity, because the cover is very beautiful and the synopsis made me curious about the story.

Thanks to NetGalley, the publisher and the author for giving me a free copy in exchange for an honest review!

[Sandra · Rating 3 out of 5]

Check out my full video review: https://youtu.be/fMuhe2xr6Qk

Being Amani follows Amani trying to get her life together after having to leave her home with her mom in the middle of the night from her abuse father. But can she find happiness in the right places?

This book has many different heavy themes, and I highly recommend looking up trigger warnings for the book. It has some good moments, but I failed to have a stronger emotional connection mostly due to the writing. It was not really written in my style, and the shortness of the book made the impact of the story lesser. It still had some good elements and is a good read. 3/5 stars.

[Fernanda Granzotto · Rating 2 out of 5]

*Thank you Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with an early copy of this book for review, all opinions are my own*

Trigger warning: abuse, violence, anxiety, rape, alcoholism, depression, overdose, and abusive relationship.

This is a very quick book to read and that's was the reason that I finished it (but I admit that the last 20 pages I read over).
It's not a bad book, but I found it poorly executed, we have a story and premise that is interesting, but the author ends up falling into stereotypes and badly made clichés.
The book, while containing heavy themes, has a very youthful tone.
I found it shallow, the story it's a little confusing because in one paragraph we are in one scene and in the other, we have already skipped to the next.
The writing is not bad and it makes the book quick.
I found the themes worked very shallow and too fast, there was no depth in anything not even in the characters.
I don't know if I recommend it if you are interested in giving it a chance you might like it more.

[lucy, she-her · Rating 2 out of 5]

this is a random book i picked out from the library. it wasn’t bad enough to be a DNF, but it wasn’t great. it has a flat writing style; the way the characters talk sounds stilted and fake, like a child writing a story; it sounds VERY american for something apparently british (and northern at that); there is poor grammar and punctuation; there is even the wrong use of “their” at one point.
the author clearly isn’t used to writing which is ok, i get that it’s not for everyone. but for me, it made the book pretty bad.
there is also a trigger warning on the back cover (which is appreciated) but it doesn’t say what triggers are included in the book, rendering it useless. i get that this risks spoilers, but it’s either that or just don’t use a trigger warning.

[Céline · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’m sorry but I could not finish this book. I loved the cover, it’s what made me request the book and I tried multiple times to get through it but I just couldn’t. The idea and the plot seem great, really. But the writing style to me was so cringy, I felt like I was reading a wattpad book and that’s not what I want to read in a published book. There were so many details that were unnecessary and the writing seemed kind of childish.
The topics as well are really heavy topics but they were poorly written. They don’t go in depth, don’t discuss them. The characters are flat, superficial and lead by stereotypes.
I really don’t like to say this. But I give this 1.5 stars.

[Ragan · Rating 2 out of 5]

this was honestly so bad

[Lesley Wilkinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Being Amani is a wonderful, thought provoking coming-of-age novel.
Amani has just turned 16 and is experiencing all the dilemmas that are seemingly unique to teenagers, but in reality, are ongoing, universal challenges that form part of growing up for most people. Sanaa, her best friend, is pretty, popular, media savvy and all the boys love her. Leo dreams of being a professional footballer and not the dentist his parents want him to be. Sanaa likes Tyler, the local ‘Bad Boy’, whilst Amani likes Ryan, who’s not the nice lad as he makes out to be – oh, and Amani likes Leo too, who’s out of bounds because he’s Sanaa’s cousin – and friendship always trumps boyfriends, right?

Told through Amani’s viewpoint, we see an unfolding story of friendship, fall-outs, peer pressure and blossoming romance. But we also see a darker, more unsettling side to life for Amani: her struggles with the break up of her parent’s abusive marriage, her adaptation to life and new friends in a different city, her personal struggles with mental health and well-being, her fears for her unhappy, depressed mum and anger towards her dad, the instigator of all the changes, who is moving on with a new life, home and relationship without a care in the world – or so it seems. Only her Grandad is helping to keep it all together.

Being Amani is simply told and acutely observant, encapsulating wonderful descriptions of what it’s like to be a teenager on the cusp of adulthood. The narrative is not afraid to confront and tackle the challenging subjects of domestic abuse, sexual coercion, peer pressure and mental health struggles. But these subjects are written with real compassion and humour, as well as in an honest, meaningful way. As we live alongside Amani, her longing to fit in, her aching for ‘true love’, her sadness living with the after-effects of domestic abuse and marriage breakdown, we also become part of Amani’s gradual acceptance and ability to grow and change. Anabelle Steele’s masterly writing (just enough to see and know) encapsulates the nature and character of Amani, her friends and family, in a wonderful way. Amani, herself, is a wonderful, funny, brave, flawed, hopeful and resilient character. The subject matter, though upsetting at times, also brings a reminder and a promise that, whilst we don’t live in a perfect world, true happiness is about being honest to yourself and others and involves brave acts of acceptance, change and forgiveness in order to move on.

This glorious book reminds us that, even in the darkest times in our lives, hope can always shine through if we allow ourselves to embrace it. Being Amani is a beautiful, honest story by a wonderful, thoughtful writer. I can’t wait to read more from Anabelle Steele, but more importantly, I can’t wait for my nieces and nephews to read more of her work too.

[Karen · Rating 2 out of 5]

Today I am joining the @literallypr
virtual #BookTour for Annabelle Steeles Being Amani

#BookTour #BookReview #Review
#BookBlogger #Books #BookPost
#BookTwitter #BeingAmani
@LiterallyPR @Hashtag_Blak

Many thanks to @literallypr for the copy of Being Amani
In exchange for an honest review.

Out now!


Please don’t judge this book by its cover. The cover is very deceiving. On first impressions it gives you the warm happy glowing feeling. But inside it covers such sensitive topics, and rather a lot of them.
Triggers of domestic abuse, sexual assault, anxiety, depression, suicide, rascism, ptsd.
Read with caution of those triggers. It gave me a real insight as to the struggling whilst growing up and dealing with all of these matters and being black, growing up in England.
It’s sad, sad that all this can and does happen. I felt emotionally on edge reading and at the end I felt drained.
That’s not to say it’s not good, it is, it’s just upsetting to have all this trauma happen in one relatively small book. Give it a go.





About the Author
Annabelle Steele is a primary school teacher in Manchester. She’s been writing poetry and YA and
children’s fiction since her own primary school days. Her books explore mental health, relationships
and the realities of being part of a minority group living in the UK. Her writing includes Black
protagonists and she recognises that there are still not enough positive Black characters in bookshops
for children and teens to relate to. She’s passionate about supporting those struggling with mental health and in 2017 published an adult colouring book called Positivity Ink with all proceeds going to
MIND.
ESSENTIAL DETAILS
Title: Being Amani
Author: Annabelle Steele
Genre: YA, Fiction
Publisher: Hashtag Press
Publication date: May 20 2021
Availability: Paperback, eBook, International distribution
ISBN: 978-1-913835-04-0 (paperback) 978-1-913835-05-7
(ebook)
Page count: 256
Price: £8.99
twitter.com/beingasteele
beingasteele.com
Media requests & enquiries: info@literallypr.com, www.literallypr.com, +44 (0) 7904801669

[Charlotte Cunningham · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

This book definitely had a lot of promise. It touched on some very important issues that I think are imperative to YA literature, such as race, domestic abuse, mental health etc, but never quite hit the mark for any of them.

Amani was a likeable young protagonist who was very relatable. I felt her pain and guilt over the situation she was in, and seeing her come out the other side was beautiful. Her relationships with others were patchy - Leo, for example, was a very well thought out character, and we got to see their bond. I did feel like Sanaa was pushed into the stereotypical teenage side character role, and we didn’t find out much about her, making Amani’s feelings about their rollercoaster friendship feel a bit hollow. This was true of most of Amani’s relationships - I felt we were just starting to get there with her mum and Grandad at the end, but I’d have liked to have explored those more throughout and not just after the incident.

I thought the theme of domestic abuse survivors was well handled, up until the end. I didn’t enjoy the excuses that were made for Amani’s father, nor that her mum and Grandad were quite forceful that she give him another chance. For a book aimed at young adults, the message seemed to be that you should forgive your abuser because they might change and I just couldn’t get on board with that. I thought the mirroring of her parents relationship with her relationship with Ryan was very interesting and worked well in the story.

Overall, I felt like this book could’ve been so much more than it was. Considering the age that it is aimed at, I think it missed a real opportunity to talk about some heavy issues that need to be spoken about more.

[Bookshortie · Rating 5 out of 5]

After what Amani labels as ‘that night’, Amani and her mother fled from London and sought refuge in Manchester with her grandfather. For Amani a lot has changed since moving to Manchester. She has more stability in her home life with her mum and grandfather, a new college and new friendships with Sanaa and Leo, her best friends.

The story then moves between the past and the present and we are given an insight into what Amani and her mother have been through, but also the lasting effects of what ‘that night’ has had on them. However, an unexpected visitor is about to turn Amani’s new life on its head. This blast from the past not only has an impact on her home life, but also her friendships because let’s be honest growing up is hard enough as it is without adding further complications to the mix. She finds herself moving further away from her best friends and trying to find a sense of belonging with Ryan, whilst trying to process the upheaval in her life.

This was one of my anticipated reads of the year and I couldn’t wait to read it. For quite a short book, which I consumed in one evening, it far exceeded my expectations. I loved how the main protagonist is a young black female teenager and everything she goes through really pulled at my heart strings. This was a very emotional read for me. It dealt with so many different and sensitive subjects such as domestic abuse, depression, mental health, panic attacks and PTSD etc. On top of all these issues that surround Amani, throw in the fact that she's a teenager and it’s easy to see how everything can be overwhelming and feel like the walls are closing in on you. There were some parts which I couldn't help but put my hand to my mouth as I continued to read because all of those feelings that jumped from the page invaded my heart. At times it was like I was standing next to Amani while she was on her journey. I loved the character of Amani because she was very real and relatable. Another shining star in this book has to be Amani’s grandfather, who I can only describe as the most loveliest sweetest grandparent in fictional history and reminded me very much of my own grandfather.

The author has dealt with the subjects in the book in a very diplomatic, honest and sensitive way. At the same time not seeking to sugar coat these same very real experiences many teenagers and families are facing on a daily basis. I can only describe this book as a very raw but real read and truly commend the author for such a fantastic piece of writing. Having read this book as an adult I truly wish there had been more books like this with such diverse characters when I was Amani’s age so it is nice to see books such as this and their authors are being given the recognition that they truly deserve.

This is a book I would highly recommend to all. Being Amani is a book that will stay with me for a long time and one that I will be revisiting.

I received a gifted copy from an honest review

[EL · Rating 3 out of 5]

Being Amani is the coming of age story of Amani, who moves from London to Manchester to live with her grandfather after one too many abusive incidents between her parents.

From the blurb, I absolutely wasn’t expecting to be launched straight into an abuse storyline and would like to see trigger warnings at the start of this book! Lots of common (and less common) and actually really heavy issues some teens deal with are addressed during the course of the book, which is great to see, yet it was in a more superficial and cliched way than I’d have liked. This was an easy read and I don’t want this to come across in a negative way as I very much enjoyed the style of writing. I also absolutely adored the character of Leo (and also his parents) - his compassion for Amani was beautiful.

I do believe the story could do with fleshing out a little more, in particular I would have loved to see more of Grandad’s life story as he’s such a key character, but more importantly some of the heavier issues need to be expanded on. It’s pretty impossible to explain this without giving spoilers away. I would never usually mention this in a review but I feel very strongly on this, as from experience I can safely say one conversation does not negate or make up for years of abuse. I don’t think it would be possible for Amani to forgive or forget that easily, especially with the complex situation with her mum. It was really positive to see Levi try to reconcile his issues but this is a process and that should be represented, which would give the book a more believable conclusion.

Thank you NetGalley & YA Hashtag Blak for the advance review copy.

[E-Lynn Kok · Rating 3 out of 5]

A coming of age story about a girl named Amani whose parents were in a toxic and abusive marriage. Now that her mother is divorced, Amani and her mother live with her grandfather. They are adapting to their new life, but with their past trauma haunting them. It is hard to say that the past is in the past. Will letting go break them free of the invisible shackles of a family in tatters or will they sew the tears back together into a patchwork quilt?

Themes: Mental health, PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, Abuse, Family

Even though Amani is in college, the way this book is written felt very young young adult, like teenage type. Why? It focuses very little on her college experience and her classes, the whole college package. It was very centred around her family and their lifestyle, which is like one of the "Sets" in the movie "Being Amani". The lack of age-related content threw the book off a bit since it can easily be as though Amani is in high school as a normal teenage student instead of a young adult entering the early paths of grown-up society. College age content doesn't mean - wild parties, irresponsible drinking, unprotected sex, irrational and stupid actions. It can also mean - college assignment stress, deadline workloads, classes and subjects that interest Amani, things that she is passionate to learn about and contributing to society. It felt that her character was still in the developing stage. It was a tad disappointing since I had high hopes for the structure of the book. It was all very predictable. And no, I can't forgive her father for his misdoings. He can burn in hell for all I care.

[Tiffany catsinfable · Rating 2 out of 5]

CW: Suicide, abuse, mental health

First, I would like to thank Net Galley along with the publisher for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

A year has passed since the tragedy in Amani’s life, and the opportunity to start over was presented when she moved. With the unexpected reappearance of a past individual, she is dragged into the spiral of the flood of memories that she has tried so desperately to forget.

I was very drawn into the synopsis of this book, as it was very apparent that something tragic happened to Amani. But, alas, I was met with disappointment. The book danced around the bush a lot regarding what could have happened. With it being obvious what was being talked about, it was still never said. There were also no trigger warnings for the content that was being discussed in the book which was a big knock down for me. It was just a never-ending derailing train of heavy topics being thrown at you quickly. With her mother’s constant excuses and acceptance of the domestic violence from her father, and the stereotypical references of what a “normal” girl best friend should be, this book had a lot of “NO” moments for me.

As someone who has survived domestic violence, suicide attempts, and rape, the message that was being sent from the book was mind numbing and stomach lurching. Yes, it is okay to forgive someone who tore you to shreds, but excuses should NEVER be made for that person.

[ava grace · Rating 2 out of 5]

Being Amani by Annabelle Steele was a beautiful coming of age story about a teenage girl named Amani who has been up and moved from London to Manchester after an incident with her father. We follow her as she deals with all things teenager; petty fights, boys, alcohol, and of course wanting to fit in. I ended up giving this book a four and a half stars out of five. There were so many amazing elements to this book and I couldn't put it down.
When I first requested this arc I saw the pink and blue cover with a smiling girl and thought this would be a fun story about a girl in high school. I couldn't have been farther from the truth. Throughout the entire book we watch Amani as she suffers from panic attacks and coming to terms with this new life after both her and her mother leave an abusive husband and father. I absolutely loved the way it was portrayed and written. I could truly feel the pain that was going through Amani's mind as she dealt with all of these things by herself.
This book is a story about resilience, loving yourself, and finding hope in those around you. Every single character in this book was so dynamic and round that you couldn't help but feel as if it was all real. Leo's compassion for Amani was absolutely adorable. Her relationship with Ryan was something that happens to girls all around the world, not just in Manchester, and I loved that Annabelle Steele included it. I wish that we had seen just a little bit more of Amani's best friend Sanaa but that is my only critique. All in all an amazing read!

[myblackbookish_life · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Goodreads incorporate half ratings" Challenge...
(3.75 stars)
Hashtag Press & Hashtag BLAK provided me with an e-arc of this title.****

TW: microaggressions, underaged drinking, suicide attempt, parental abuse (physical, mental, emotional), dubious consent/attempted rape

Y’all. This is an angsty but quick read. Another reviewer said [paraphrasing here] they wish the cover had been different because Amani’s big smile is at odds with what she deals with in the book and just the overall plot. While Being Amani isn’t a “happy story”, the book does end on a hopeful note, though it's undercut by the feeling that the resolved ending isn't deserved due to the pace and short length of the story.

An abusive father who colors Amani’s world and feeds into her panic attacks and anxiety and her mother’s depression aren’t treated lightly in this story, and the going between the past and the present informs us of that stressful past before Amani and her mom fled for Manchester.

This wasn't a bad story, and I did enjoy it enough to finish.

[thewoollygeek (tea, cake, crochet & books) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very quick book to read and I didn’t realise how quick as I was at the end before I knew it. I really liked p the exploration of what it means to be a Black teenager in the U.K., as a white UK reader it highlights the pervasive racism that Amani and so many others experience, she helps the reader feel and experience how horrible it is; that somehow you don’t belong purely because of your skin colour. Devastatingly well done, should be read by all white people (especially anyone who says all lives matter !) . I enjoyed the lift towards the end that holds a slightly more hopeful tone. It’s a captivating read that will have you in tears as Amani will really touch your heart.

Trigger warning: abuse, violence, rape, alcoholism, depression and overdose

Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for a free copy for an honest opinion

[Gemini · Rating 4 out of 5]

Relatable

This coming of age story brought back memories of all of the angst teenage girls face. Amani deals with insecurity, hormonal teenage boys, and jealous classmates. I felt like I stepped back into my own high school years. Beyond the typical teenage drama, she also had to deal with her parents very grown up issues. They were battling depression, alcoholism, and abusive behavior. It was a lot to take in. Amani’s grandfather and her best friends really made this a touching story. The puppy love that blossomed throughout the book was so sweet and wholesome. I really enjoyed that the most.

[Amber Alvarado Canto · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is definitely a quick read. This story focuses on Amani whose witnessed her mother being abused by her father. She's currently living with her Granddad who loves her and seems to be her friend. Because of her father's controlling ways, she's never had a real relationship... This will be evident in the choice that she makes in the book.

Overall, I liked the story. It was a little predictable (with the friendship with Leo, her fall out with Sanaa, and her relationship with Ryan), but it held some surprises that I did not expect.

[Rachael Sampson · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book focuses on Amani Brown and her life after experiencing physical and emotional abuse from her father (and witnessing her mother experience that same abuse from him). While the depictions of mental health and anxiety were accurate and believable, the majority of the novel goes at an extremely fast pace that is inconceivable. Conflicts resolved too quickly and communication among Amani and her friends were big issues in this book. Hopefully the author can write better paced books in the future.

[Vicky · Rating 4 out of 5]

From start I was championing Amani and her Mum. For a YA read, I think it raised important issues around domestic abuse, mental health and consent which should be talked about more. A quick read. I'll be promoting this to pupils at school.
I was pleased that Amani's relationship with herself and other blossomed, although not sure I'd have forgiven so easily.
I particularly liked all the musical shout outs too ~ the power of music! Not forgetting its link to Manchester too❤️

[K · Rating 2 out of 5]

I felt like this book was mostly fairly superficial with regard to the issues it tried to address, but I enjoyed the way it was written as a very quick, easy read. I guess my gripe is that I feel it was just too soft on the issues of abuse. I'm not sure I think it sends the right message to its target audience of YA readers.

[Owen Hollifield · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a fantastic read!

This book is so well written and Amani is such a likeable central character.

This book touches on a lot of important subjects and I think it's definitely a book that all teens/YA should get a chance to read.

[A. Bello · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great example of Black girls who suffer and have to smile through their pain.

[Attiya Khan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book it was so engaging and easy to read. I felt for Amani and her mum and loved all the teen drama

[Kimberly Azumah · Rating 3 out of 5]

solid 3.75. was so beautiful and touched on so many beautiful topics but i feel like the tropes were slightly too cliche. loved it nevertheless

[Tamia · Rating 4 out of 5]

very heartwarming

[Danielle Greaves · Rating 4 out of 5]

Being Amani is unlike any book I've ever read. It's deep, raw and unapologetic. Annabelle wrote a beautiful tale about a black girl who has a had a difficult few years and is trying to guide herself through the worst time in her life - her teenage years. Throughout the book I followed Amani down the classic tale of teenage love, friendship and loneliness and i was gripped.

I read this book within two sittings. I genuinely feel so bewildered that one girl would have to go through such devastating times, until I remember these things actually happen in real life. Readers will find things to relate to Amani with so easier, as she is such an easy and down to earth character. I loved the flash backs to her life with her dad, it definitely gave some extra depth to her and her mums characters. Her friendship with her best friend is very understandable and temperamental, I really enjoyed seeing how it worked out. The pace of the book is fantastic for a smaller novel, once you pick it up you won't be able to put it down.

Let's talk about the cover. I think the artwork is stunning, and I'd definitely pick this up if I saw it in a shop! In my opinion, some heavier trigger warnings need to be addressed on the back. Such as panic attacks, attempted suicide and abuse. I know most readers want to know these things before going into a book, so it's better to know than being shocked by some dark scenes.

Overall I absolutely loved this book, and I highly recommend it for everyone who is looking for a deeper and eye opening story.

[Re • · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5
22/30
RTC-- i got an ARC of this and review this soon
---------------------------------------07.14.21 (edit)
i received an eARC of this, though all opions are unbiased and my own!

DID YOU SEE THE COVER? It’s stunning!!!!!!
The hair, the smile, EVERYTHING IS MAGNIFICENT!!✨💚

This book was wonderful, I enjoyed my time with Amani, her family, and friends. It was terrible for her to live in fear like she did, and her mother contending and grieving through it all. Amani is a teen after all and she’s exploring these new feelings, emotions and changes occurring in her life. Despite all the curveballs being thrown her way she is able to slowly but surely persevere, whether that’s opening up or asking for help.

I liked how Amani has to contend with the very real taboo within the Black community about seeking professional help and how it can be overlooked or seen for only those with privilege being able to access these things. Her growth throughout the book is slow, she makes mistakes, while still remaining a teen and it really resonated with me. We’re expected to be this grown and mature person while making crucial life designs and trying to help our parents something through their struggles, in which Amani is constantly questioning whether she’s being selfish for doing things for herself or assuaging her parent's feelings which is always a constant debate in the situation Amani is in. I did love the ending and was rooting for her to succeed the entire time.

[Kiki Hempell · Rating 2 out of 5]

For Amani, it is more than clear has been through an awful lot when we are first introduced to her and her story. It is apparent very early on that she wants to break free of the chains that have haunted her past and want to look forward to a new and exciting future. But things aren't as easy as they seem and sometimes you need to accept what has happened and to take help from those who want to support you before running again.

As she is a teenager still, her outlook on life does not always present the best idea of how to cope with the scars that she has been left with and there is more than one occasion where you cannot help feeling a little annoyed about her choices.

But she is a human girl who wants more than anything to protect her mother.

Despite exposing readers to adult themes, I felt a lot more could have been done. It felt like half the plot was about how much Amani wanted to be around boys and not really caring about very much else. This did not help with her "best friend" who seemed to be absent over some argument that I can't really remember them having.

As much as I wanted to love this book it did fall flat on my expectations. It is one of those books that you expect a lot from but doesn't deliver on the plot.