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I Hear Some People Just Have Sex
Eight and a Half Years
Sixteen Infertility Cycles
Four Timed Intercourse Cycles
Two IUI Cycles
Two Egg Retrievals
Seven Frozen Embryo Transfers
Thousands of Dollars
Two Miscarriages
Three Pregnancies
Live Births ...?
That’s my infertility story. Almost a decade of trying, almost $65,000 spent on infertility treatment. So many IVF cycles that I can give myself progesterone shots in the rear. So many transvaginal pelvic ultrasounds that a pap smear no longer impresses me. Changed relationships, changed career goals. A whole list of things no one should ever say to someone going through infertility.
And almost a baby.
Almost.
Because even though I am scheduled for a C-section next week, as I publish this book, I still do not have any guarantees.
Infertility is a hell of a life crisis.
But also, if you can learn how to navigate these choppy waters—if you can learn how to let go of what you can’t control, how to cope with the hard parts you never saw coming, how to play the world’s longest waiting game—you will build resilience and grit you didn’t think you were capable of.
This is not a “how to have a baby” book. It’s not a “how to survive until you have a baby” book. It’s a “how to survive and maybe even thrive while trying to have a baby” book. That’s what I know: how to survive infertility and make the best of it while you’re praying for the miracle of a baby. And I know how to survive this because I’ve done it for nearly a decade.
Some people just have sex to get pregnant. Not me. Maybe not you, either. We have infertility battles to fight, and this gets worse before it gets better. But I was made strong enough for this, and so were you. Let me show you how I know.
Sixteen Infertility Cycles
Four Timed Intercourse Cycles
Two IUI Cycles
Two Egg Retrievals
Seven Frozen Embryo Transfers
Thousands of Dollars
Two Miscarriages
Three Pregnancies
Live Births ...?
That’s my infertility story. Almost a decade of trying, almost $65,000 spent on infertility treatment. So many IVF cycles that I can give myself progesterone shots in the rear. So many transvaginal pelvic ultrasounds that a pap smear no longer impresses me. Changed relationships, changed career goals. A whole list of things no one should ever say to someone going through infertility.
And almost a baby.
Almost.
Because even though I am scheduled for a C-section next week, as I publish this book, I still do not have any guarantees.
Infertility is a hell of a life crisis.
But also, if you can learn how to navigate these choppy waters—if you can learn how to let go of what you can’t control, how to cope with the hard parts you never saw coming, how to play the world’s longest waiting game—you will build resilience and grit you didn’t think you were capable of.
This is not a “how to have a baby” book. It’s not a “how to survive until you have a baby” book. It’s a “how to survive and maybe even thrive while trying to have a baby” book. That’s what I know: how to survive infertility and make the best of it while you’re praying for the miracle of a baby. And I know how to survive this because I’ve done it for nearly a decade.
Some people just have sex to get pregnant. Not me. Maybe not you, either. We have infertility battles to fight, and this gets worse before it gets better. But I was made strong enough for this, and so were you. Let me show you how I know.
242 pages, ebook
Published November 23, 2020
About the author
Sandra L. Vasher
7 books18 followersSandra L. Vasher is an indie writer, recovering lawyer, dreamer, consultant, blogger, serial entrepreneur, and mommy of very spoiled dog. She enjoys long drives in fall weather, do-it-yourself projects, animated movies and cartoons, fanfiction, red wine, traveling everywhere, and baking sweet and savory treats. She can often be found trying not to hunch over her computer at her favorite coffee shops in Raleigh, North Carolina. Follow her online at sandyvasher.com.
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Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
May 15, 2021
I picked this book because infertility is one of the touchy subjects nobody wants to talk about. Not many people fully understand the struggle, and I've seen my coworkers experience the same thing. I am thinking of recommending this book sometime later. I want them to know that at least they're not alone in the journey.
As for the writing, I can already conclude the summary in just any chapter within the book. It's just that every chapter provides the details of one concept. In one part, Sandra Vasher talks about the emotional aspect of it all, while in the other chapters, she narrated the detailed medical procedures she had to undergo. There's a part with DOs & DON'T on what to say to couples who tried (but failed) to get pregnant. I feel every emotion of the author as well as everyone around her.
One thing that bugs me is the dismissive attitude of the author's husband about her condition during the first year of their marriage. I wish men would understand that not all body systems work the same way with everyone. Here, it's about the child-bearing system that fails to function. I believe that couples should talk about whether or not they want to have children early in the relationship. I saved myself from an uncertain relationship by not pursuing someone due to our incompatibility in our views on having kids.
This book will forever remain in me, and I will pass the message to everyone who needs to read this.
***
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
As for the writing, I can already conclude the summary in just any chapter within the book. It's just that every chapter provides the details of one concept. In one part, Sandra Vasher talks about the emotional aspect of it all, while in the other chapters, she narrated the detailed medical procedures she had to undergo. There's a part with DOs & DON'T on what to say to couples who tried (but failed) to get pregnant. I feel every emotion of the author as well as everyone around her.
One thing that bugs me is the dismissive attitude of the author's husband about her condition during the first year of their marriage. I wish men would understand that not all body systems work the same way with everyone. Here, it's about the child-bearing system that fails to function. I believe that couples should talk about whether or not they want to have children early in the relationship. I saved myself from an uncertain relationship by not pursuing someone due to our incompatibility in our views on having kids.
This book will forever remain in me, and I will pass the message to everyone who needs to read this.
***
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
April 6, 2021
This book is incredibly insightful and informative about a situation that can be incredibly painful. The author shares her experiences with infertility in a compassionate, honest, and open way. She provides advice that cuts through -- the real deal on this side of the medical community. I appreciate the insight and saw a bit of myself in her story. Thank you for writing and publishing this. It will help a lot of people.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews