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Pandemonium
From the moment their eyes met across the crowded sales floor, Billy knew he had met his soulmate, the woman he was meant to be with. While on a date, the appearance of three hooded figures in a field spooks Aura, and she tells Billy he needs to put her from his mind, forget she ever existed. Then she was gone.
But how do you forget the one you are destined to be with?
The only clue to his girlfriend's disappearance is an old and very strange guide to country walks that Aura had shown great interest in—particularly Walk No. 21, which would take the traveller through "deepest, darkest Somerset."
What is it about Walk No. 21 that had Aura so fascinated?
And why has it become an obsession, not only of Billy's, but of anyone who has come in contact with the book?
But how do you forget the one you are destined to be with?
The only clue to his girlfriend's disappearance is an old and very strange guide to country walks that Aura had shown great interest in—particularly Walk No. 21, which would take the traveller through "deepest, darkest Somerset."
What is it about Walk No. 21 that had Aura so fascinated?
And why has it become an obsession, not only of Billy's, but of anyone who has come in contact with the book?
282 pages, Kindle Edition
Published June 17, 2020
40 people want to read
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Displaying 1 of 1 review
August 8, 2020
A cursed guidebook leads a besotted bookseller on a dangerous
and amusing odyssey around the Somerset countryside
In 2019 I stumbled upon Leo Darke’s Lucifer Sam which became one of my favourite novels of the year and I was delighted to give it a rare 5/5 gingernuts. It was a very quirky horror comedy built around how a failed heavy metal band saves the world, it was so crazy even the legendary Sex Pistols bassist Sid Vicious comes back from the dead, taking the stage for a gig near the end. It was stupid, very funny and I would recommend it very highly. Sadly, it picked up very little press from the horror community and I regard it as a lost gem. Here is the review should you fancy ‘rediscovering’ this filthy little treat:
https://gingernutsofhorror.com/fictio...
When I heard from Grinning Skull Press that Darke had a new novel in the pipeline I got VERY excited and I hoped he would replicate the magic formulae which made Lucifer Sam such a unique experience; with a similarly clever blend of comedy, horror, sheer ridiculousness and a dollop of gore. Although Pandemonium is comparable in style to Lucifer Sam and was very enjoyable, it failed to reach the great heights of its predecessor, but still had its fair share of high points. It is also billed as ‘Book One in the 101 Ways to Hell’ series and I would question whether there is enough scope to merit a sequel.
Initially I though the novel was going to have amusing musical references, harking back to Lucifer Sam, and the opening chapter title, the rather knowingly, ‘I Hate Pink Floyd t-Shirt’ certainly backed that up, but the musical references sadly petered out. The story opens with main character Billy listening to a stolen CD of Pink Floyd cover songs when there is an aggressive knock at the door. After answering, he is promptly violently assaulted by a man who tells him to cease contacting a woman called Aura, whom we realise was Billy’s (sort of) girlfriend. Billy, in his late thirties, was a likable loser, not dissimilar to the failed rocker from Lucifer Sam.
A large part of Pandemonium takes place in a bookshop in Bristol and the amusing dynamics involving the various loser characters who work there, few of which truly enjoy their jobs and clock watch until closing time. I enjoyed these interactions, as this was a very quirky (and rather British) setting for a horror novel. After Billy takes his kicking the story flicks back to the moment when he meets Aura, a beautiful young woman he notices in the bookshop, idly flicking through guidebooks about walks across the British Isles. He does his best to chat her up, much to the amusements of his colleagues, whilst doing so he sees her thumbing through a very old looking book of walks. After she exits the shop, totally besotted by her, Billy hunts down the book she was browsing hoping it might provide a clue on how he can locate her for a date.
To say this woman has sexual magnetism would be an understatement and Billy becomes totally obsessed with her. However, we quickly realise that the book ‘The Olde Britishe Guide to 101 Walkes Through Hell’ is equally magnetic, but in very different and rather ways. If you have ever seen the Japanese horror film Dark Water there is a ball which scarily reappears after being thrown away, this book does something similar and holds whoever reads it in a dark obsessive funk, drawing them to a particular walk.
If you have ever been a casual rambler in the south of England Pandemonium may well put you off as much of the book revolves around a certain route: ‘Walk No 21 Deepest, Darkest Somerset’ which several brave souls embark upon only to face a sticky end! Some of these scenes were very entertaining, such as when perennial shoplifter Cyril Peck (who hates the countryside) nicks the book and finds himself in the middle of nowhere attempting ‘Walk No 21’ when you just know something horrible is around the corner (or over the next sty) or the local rambling group who meet a violent and bloody end after stopping for their packed lunches.
Other highlights included flashbacks to Roman Briton (364 AD) where the story originates and the entertaining back-and-forth between Billy and Julie Everly. Whilst Billy is obsessed with Aura, Julie is equally obsessed with Billy and will do anything to bed him. The blend of mundane book-stacking, getting warned by their anal manager, selling the odd book, whilst side-batting Julie’s obvious advances was a good laugh and distraction from the supernatural story. You will not take any of this very seriously.
The balance between horror and comedy is difficult to get right and although it failed to hit the sweet spots of Lucifer Sam, it still jogged along nicely and was a speedy and easy read. Although Pandemonium lacked scares, but that’s the price you pay for comedy and a light writing style, however, it did have some unsettling moments surrounding the freaky whistling Billy hears when he has been close to the dodgy book or when Billy stumbles upon the pub from Hell. Make sure you hang around for the poor saps looking around for the paintball centre which does not exist. They should have all gone to the pub instead (but in Bristol, not the one from Hell!)
and amusing odyssey around the Somerset countryside
In 2019 I stumbled upon Leo Darke’s Lucifer Sam which became one of my favourite novels of the year and I was delighted to give it a rare 5/5 gingernuts. It was a very quirky horror comedy built around how a failed heavy metal band saves the world, it was so crazy even the legendary Sex Pistols bassist Sid Vicious comes back from the dead, taking the stage for a gig near the end. It was stupid, very funny and I would recommend it very highly. Sadly, it picked up very little press from the horror community and I regard it as a lost gem. Here is the review should you fancy ‘rediscovering’ this filthy little treat:
https://gingernutsofhorror.com/fictio...
When I heard from Grinning Skull Press that Darke had a new novel in the pipeline I got VERY excited and I hoped he would replicate the magic formulae which made Lucifer Sam such a unique experience; with a similarly clever blend of comedy, horror, sheer ridiculousness and a dollop of gore. Although Pandemonium is comparable in style to Lucifer Sam and was very enjoyable, it failed to reach the great heights of its predecessor, but still had its fair share of high points. It is also billed as ‘Book One in the 101 Ways to Hell’ series and I would question whether there is enough scope to merit a sequel.
Initially I though the novel was going to have amusing musical references, harking back to Lucifer Sam, and the opening chapter title, the rather knowingly, ‘I Hate Pink Floyd t-Shirt’ certainly backed that up, but the musical references sadly petered out. The story opens with main character Billy listening to a stolen CD of Pink Floyd cover songs when there is an aggressive knock at the door. After answering, he is promptly violently assaulted by a man who tells him to cease contacting a woman called Aura, whom we realise was Billy’s (sort of) girlfriend. Billy, in his late thirties, was a likable loser, not dissimilar to the failed rocker from Lucifer Sam.
A large part of Pandemonium takes place in a bookshop in Bristol and the amusing dynamics involving the various loser characters who work there, few of which truly enjoy their jobs and clock watch until closing time. I enjoyed these interactions, as this was a very quirky (and rather British) setting for a horror novel. After Billy takes his kicking the story flicks back to the moment when he meets Aura, a beautiful young woman he notices in the bookshop, idly flicking through guidebooks about walks across the British Isles. He does his best to chat her up, much to the amusements of his colleagues, whilst doing so he sees her thumbing through a very old looking book of walks. After she exits the shop, totally besotted by her, Billy hunts down the book she was browsing hoping it might provide a clue on how he can locate her for a date.
To say this woman has sexual magnetism would be an understatement and Billy becomes totally obsessed with her. However, we quickly realise that the book ‘The Olde Britishe Guide to 101 Walkes Through Hell’ is equally magnetic, but in very different and rather ways. If you have ever seen the Japanese horror film Dark Water there is a ball which scarily reappears after being thrown away, this book does something similar and holds whoever reads it in a dark obsessive funk, drawing them to a particular walk.
If you have ever been a casual rambler in the south of England Pandemonium may well put you off as much of the book revolves around a certain route: ‘Walk No 21 Deepest, Darkest Somerset’ which several brave souls embark upon only to face a sticky end! Some of these scenes were very entertaining, such as when perennial shoplifter Cyril Peck (who hates the countryside) nicks the book and finds himself in the middle of nowhere attempting ‘Walk No 21’ when you just know something horrible is around the corner (or over the next sty) or the local rambling group who meet a violent and bloody end after stopping for their packed lunches.
Other highlights included flashbacks to Roman Briton (364 AD) where the story originates and the entertaining back-and-forth between Billy and Julie Everly. Whilst Billy is obsessed with Aura, Julie is equally obsessed with Billy and will do anything to bed him. The blend of mundane book-stacking, getting warned by their anal manager, selling the odd book, whilst side-batting Julie’s obvious advances was a good laugh and distraction from the supernatural story. You will not take any of this very seriously.
The balance between horror and comedy is difficult to get right and although it failed to hit the sweet spots of Lucifer Sam, it still jogged along nicely and was a speedy and easy read. Although Pandemonium lacked scares, but that’s the price you pay for comedy and a light writing style, however, it did have some unsettling moments surrounding the freaky whistling Billy hears when he has been close to the dodgy book or when Billy stumbles upon the pub from Hell. Make sure you hang around for the poor saps looking around for the paintball centre which does not exist. They should have all gone to the pub instead (but in Bristol, not the one from Hell!)
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