The Imperfect Mom: Candid Confessions of Mothers Living in the Real World

by Therese J. Borchard

The supermom is a suburban legend. At some point, we’ve all forgotten to pack a lunch, yelled at our kids, or been late to soccer practice. This book is for every mom who has ever gotten angry at being interrupted from a consecutive five hours of sleep, or who has ever hid in the bathroom just to get a few moments of peace.

In this collection of thirty-six original essays, award-winning novelists, famous columnists, and bestselling authors tell it like it is, covering a plethora of confessions to reassure any mother. Gail Belsky writes about the emotional torture that led to the secret circumcision of her son. Andrea Buchanan talks about the pile of dirty laundry that saved her son's life. Muffy Mead-Ferro confesses to her slacker summer, three months without one organized activity. Judith Newman recounts the game of Torpedo that landed her and her twins in the emergency room. Jacquelyn Mitchard shares how she was expelled from the carpool for showing up late one too many times. Together, their stories provide an entertaining, affirming, and sometimes surprising look at the perils and pleasures of motherhood.

Poignant and amusing, The Imperfect Mom is a refreshing look at mistakes we all make in mothering and a consoling and hilarious testimony to parents who don't have it all figured it out.


From the Trade Paperback edition.

Genres: Nonfiction, Parenting

240 pages, Paperback

First published April 25, 2006

About the author

Therese Borchard is the author of the hit daily blog “Beyond Blue” on Beliefnet.com, which is featured weekly on The Huffington Post and was voted by PsychCentral.com as one of the top 10 depression blogs, and she moderates the popular depression support group, Beyond Blue, on Beliefnet’s social networking site. Therese is the editor of The Imperfect Mom: Candid Confessions of Mothers Living in the Real World, featured in Real Simple, Parenting, More, Working Mother, Psychology Today, Fit Pregnancy, the Chicago Tribune, and on Salon.com, and of I Love Being a Mom: Treasured Stories, Memories, and Milestones, a Target selection, and featured in Redbook, Parenting, BabyTalk, the Chicago Tribune, and the Detroit Free Press. With Michael Leach, she is co-editor of A Celebration of a Married Life and the national bestseller I Like Being Catholic. Her newest book, The Pocket Therapist, will be published by Hachette Book Group in April of 2010.

Therese has published articles in the Washington Post, Ladies’ Home Journal, Parenting, Guideposts, Publishers Weekly, the Baltimore Sun, and on PsychCentral.com, The Huffington Post, and Yahoo! She is becoming a go-to expert in the field of pop-psychology, recently quoted in The Wall Street Journal, O, and on CNN.com and Time.com. Her nationally syndicated column, “Our Turn,” is distributed biweekly by Catholic News Service. She appears monthly on Sirius Satellite Radio, is featured regularly on radio programs throughout the country, and has been a repeated guest on national television programs, such as "Fox and Friends" (Fox News Channel) and "Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher" (ABC). She lives with her husband, Eric, and their two “spirited” children in Annapolis, Maryland.

Daily Blog: Beyond Blue on Beliefnet.com

Follow @ThereseBorchard on Twitter

Reviews

[Stacy · Rating 1 out of 5]

Bo-ring. My son fell from the changing table onto a pile of dirty laundry, which broke his fall and saved his life, and I learned to accept that I'm not a perfect mom, and that's okay. My daughter choked on a pretzel and I froze instead of comforting her, but I learned to accept that I'm not a perfect mom, and that's okay. My son pushed his friend into a frozen river and he nearly drowned but he didn't and I learned to accept that I'm not a perfect mom and that's okay. I forgot to sign my kids up for summer camp or any organized activity this summer (oh, except for swimming lessons, and a family trip to Wyoming, and visits from 12 different family members) and I learned to accept that I'm not a perfect mom... These essays should've been funny and engaging and reassuring. But instead they were bland like baby food. Couldn't finish it.

[Sharon Falduto]

A series of essays, written by moms (magazine editors, authors, others of that ilk), meditating on their less-than-perfect parenting moments, which range from the mundane "I didn't sign them up for soccer" (I think that was Muffy Mead-Ferro again) to the more critical "My child nearly died." A slim tome, which I easily finished reading in a day.

[Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book. It is a collection of essays by mothers (most of them professional writers, or somehow involved in the literary profession) who struggle to live up to the "supermom" image. It is comforting to know that I'm not the only one who worries every day that I am somehow scarring my kids for life. I appreciated the authors' senses of humor and their honesty about mistakes they've made and accidents that have happened. Andrea Buchanan's essay, "How Dirty Laundry Saved My Baby's Life" is not to be missed. Her description of her hatred for the task of laundry rang so true, it made me laugh and cry at the same time. "I Was a Carpool Dropout" by Jacquelyn Mitchard gave me new insight into the unique struggles of single parents. Her story is raw, honest, heartbreaking and inspiring all at once. Not every story is as strong as the others, but overall it was a quick, enjoyable read that left me feeling a sense of community with all the moms who so graciously shared their stories.

[Alison · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book wasn't quite what I expected. It's not a lighthearted look at some "imperfect" moms who, say, make their kids Halloween costumes out of garbage bags. Rather, it's a collection of fairly serious essays about motherhood, and how mothers feel and/or are, "imperfect." Some of the essays were much more interesting and well-written than others, and I agree with the Amazon reviewer who said some of the mothers went to great lengths to justify their "imperfectness" - ("but my kid is at the top of their class anyway, is a star football player, helps out around the house", etc.)

Overall a quick read, though, and gave me some things to think about.

[Julie Verner · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book does not necessarily offer the same depth overall that some other books do. I think the first few chapters are probably the weakest. Having said that, once I got further into the book, I did enjoy it. Because it is an edited work with many different authors contributing, the book allowed me to be exposed to a range of mommy authors and to walk away with a few favorites. There are a definitely some funny story tellers in the book.

[Kris · Rating 3 out of 5]

Meh. A couple of pretty good essays (I particularly enjoyed the one by Jacquelyn Mitchard), but a lot of defensive moms, sometimes justifying things that shouldn't be justified, and sometimes feeling guilt over things that are not within their control. I get it. I'm a mom of 5 kids, and the guilt can be overwhelming. I screw up all the time. I just don't know how helpful this book is.

[Becky · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was pretty fun to read. But, wow, there are some guilt-ridden moms out there. Some of the vignettes were touching, some were sad, and some were just weird. All of the stories were written by women-authors, so that was pretty interesting.

[Kirsten · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some of the stories were great and some I just didn't relate to.

[AJ Conroy · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh