It All Comes Back to You centers itself on an unlikely, unpleasant reunion. Kiran finds out that her older sister, Ameera, is in a relationship with Faisal, whose younger brother, Deen, used to be Kiran's ex-boyfriend. Three years ago, Deen ghosted Kiran after something went horribly wrong in his and Faisal's lives, and the reunion is a terrible reminder of how Kiran was left lonely at a time in her life when she needed Deen more than anything. To make matters worse, Kiran overhears Faisal talking about how he doesn't want Ameera to find out about his past, and she makes it her mission to get down to the bottom of the lies, all while Deen desperately tries to keep the relationship and eventual marriage from falling apart.
REP: Pakistani MC's, Filipino SC.
CW's: parental emotional abuse, mentions of drug addiction, and an almost-occurrence of sexual harassment.
NOTE: The spoilers in this review have been left untagged. I did so because I need to be explicit about them in order to discuss the serious issues I had with the book, and because I didn't see many reviews discuss these issues in depth even though I think they should be.
PROS:
- Writing style and pacing. I really enjoy the way Farah Naz Rishi manages to carry a story; the plot progression felt natural, there was a great balance of atmosphere and detail without it being too overwhelming, and the dialogue (albeit corny at times) felt generally emblematic of teenagers. I think she does a great job of immediately drawing you into the plot, and despite the fact that this was ultimately a severely disappointing read for me, I can admit that she has a good way with words. The few deeper conversations that occurred every now and then were very well penned, and they felt real, emotional, and heartfelt.
- Establishment of voice. Often, books that cover more than one POV fall into the pitfall of being unable to significantly distinguish between the different voices. I didn't find this to be the case here. Admittedly, I was listening to the audiobook, so not distinguishing between Kiran's and Deen's voices would have been difficult, but I felt like their thought processes and manner of internal speech were distinct enough of each other so as to set them apart as characters. For Deen, especially, I think the level of introspection and reflection he engaged in really drew me to him as someone akin to a real person, not just a character.
- Deen's character arc. To elaborate on the previous point, Deen was a significantly reflective character. On the surface, he at first appeared to be nothing more than your typical, shallow, somewhat self-absorbed Desi boy; but to my surprise, his thoughts were overwhelmingly concerned with him stressing over his mistakes, feeling desperate to fix them and preventing future ones from happening, trying to think of ways to salvage burnt bridges, and expressing remorse when he did things he knew he shouldn't have. There was a great balance between his ability to make things worse for himself and his ability to be cognizant of that, decide to do better, and actually deliver on the promises he made along that vein. The fact that he defended his brother out of so much love and concern, and that he repeatedly tried to reach out to and make amends with Kiran (in addition to recognizing that she had a right to feel hurt by him) despite her constant rebuffs and attempts to sabotage Faisal, really stuck out to me. It's funny to me that Deen was supposed to be the less religious person compared to Kiran, because his actions and intentions, to me, embodied how a Muslim truly ought to carry themselves.
CONS:
- Kiran's character arc. In comparison, I was incredibly frustrated with Kiran as a character all throughout the book. To preface, I completely understand where her sense of distrust came from. If I knew my older sister's future life partner was hiding a secret from her, I would be concerned, too. In addition to this context, Kiran was also still dealing with the weight of her late mother's desire for the family to stick together, and her lack of closure with Deen when he ghosted her. Her feelings of grief and betrayal were easy to sympathize with, and I didn't judge her for her initial distrust of Faisal, especially since Deen emphasized that he couldn't tell her the truth (this being out of respect to Faisal, and out of a mutual fear of Deen's and Faisal's parents, who were emotionally blackmailing them to keep quiet). What I found incredibly difficult to sympathize with were her blatant invasions of privacy and attempts to sabotage Faisal's character. It already felt incredibly inappropriate to me that she had the gall to go through Faisal's things, read through his diary about a traumatic time in his life, and steal a page from the diary as "proof" of his secret. To add onto the horror of this all, however, was Kiran's plan to intoxicate Faisal, a devout Muslim, and to send a stripper to more or less sexually harass him when he'd never consented to it, all in an attempt to defame his character in the eyes of her sister. The depth of Kiran's transgressions, all in the name of knowing what was best for her sister, was ridiculous. Although there were a few occasions where she experienced guilt over what she was doing, there were rarely moments of genuine reflection from her on the seriousness of her actions, with her apologies coming in the final quarter of the book and hardly spanning a few lukewarm sentences. They didn't feel like real apologies at all, and for a majority of the book, she felt like an incredibly self-centered character. Admittedly, there were transgressions Deen made as well; he tried to look at her phone twice to confirm his suspicions about her attempts at sabotage, and he was wrong for that, as he acknowledged himself. What I don't appreciate about the overarching plot, though, is how it tried to imply that Deen's wrongs and Kiran's wrongs were somehow on the same level. Kiran blatantly attempted to break up a marriage and repeatedly defame a man's character (with serious Islamic transgressions at the heart of it), and despite Deen's multiple attempts to make amends with her (inclusive of a plea for her to stop trying to sabotage his brother so long as he would eventually tell her the truth about the "secret", a plea which she disregarded), Kiran for the most part refused to contend with him seriously. I don't mean to defend Deen and Faisal entirely. I do think they could have been more honest and upfront about their past with Ameera and Kiran; but I can also acknowledge that the pressure of emotional blackmail and abuse from Desi parents is severe, and I can't fault either of them for feeling terrified in the face of that, nor do I think it gave Kiran the right to do all that she did. The lack of accountability from her in the end, and the fact that Deen and Faisal were the only characters making significant apologies in the end despite all of the damage she did, was really distasteful for me to read. Having your main character say, "I'm sorry, but it wasn't personal," at the 94% mark of the book isn't all that reassuring, nor does it feel like an apology that deserves forgiveness and sympathy.
- Address of sexual harassment. The thing that angered me the most about this book was how lightly sexual harassment was treated within the scope of the larger narrative. It was appalling to me that, under the guise of writing about "messy" Muslim teens, Farah Naz Rishi decided to write about a Muslim character manipulating another, devout Muslim character into becoming intoxicated with alcohol and nearly being sexually harassed by a stripper he never asked for, all so she could snap an incriminating picture and defame his character. It felt disrespectful to use a sex worker for this purpose, it felt incredibly unethical to pass this off as just a run-of-the-mill attempt at sabotage that was never brought up again in any major capacity, and it felt insulting to a portrayal of Islam. I'm not one to judge how authors write their Muslim characters. I'm well aware that Muslims of all varieties exist, that some take rules more seriously than others, and that the young adult period of people's lives is very turbulent and often a time where they're uncertain in their own religious identity. I don't mind seeing Muslim characters be messy or make mistakes because they're not exactly sure how to place themselves within their faith. That's human. What's not human, or ethical, to me at least, is what Kiran tried to do to Faisal. It's not a laughable offense to manipulate another Muslim into unknowingly committing multiple sins, especially when one of those sins would allow for them to be sexually harassed against their will; even barring the implications within Islam, it's, again. . . just completely unethical, and I was appalled that it more or less came and went. I think writing about the multifaceted nature of Muslim identity is fine, but I also think, when you're writing with the intent to highlight Muslim characters, there's a degree of respect you should have for your faith and some of its expectations, especially when they overlap with ethics and morals that nearly anyone should abide by.
- The audiobook narrators. Along a different vein, another thing that severely annoyed me when I was listening to the book was the blatant mispronunciation of Urdu words all throughout. From what I saw, the author approved of the narrators chosen for the book, so I'm confused as to why she would be satisfied with a product wherein half of her own language was utterly butchered. A little after the halfway point, Kiran admits that her Urdu sucks, which is understandable; not everyone is fluent in their native tongue. But I think there's a difference in between struggling to coherently speak a language and butchering the pronunciation of every other word within it despite living within social circles where the language is constantly used. There were parts that I couldn't even recognize as sounding like actual Urdu, despite how common the words being used were, and it took away my focus from the book often. I wish there had been more effort put into to secure narrators who actually knew how to speak the language, or who were at least given lessons or a pronunciation guide to ensure they would pronounce things properly.
- The lack of focus on Faisal's non-profit. Admittedly, this is a fairly minor complaint, but I really wish that there had been more focus on what Faisal and Ameera were doing with his non-profit to help rehabilitate kids with a criminal record. In light of Faisal's past, and how it reflected on his aims with the non-profit, it would have been nice to see it brought into the conversation more so that we could really see how he had picked his life back up through his passion for this endeavor, spurred by personal experience.
FINAL RATING: 2.25