Distinguished pediatrician Dr Robert Bucknam, M.D. and co-author Gary Ezzo are two of the world's leading experts on infant management concepts. In this revised 5th edition, they have updated their groundbreaking approach which has found favor with over six million parents in all 50 states and has been translated into 16 languages around the world.
For over 20 years, On Becoming Babywise has grown to become the #1 newborn parenting manual for naturally synchronizing your baby's feeding time, waketime and nighttime sleep cycles, so the whole family can sleep through the night.
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In addition to hardback and paperback, On Becoming Babywise is available in 3 digital
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On Becoming Babywise is more than an infant-management concept. It is a mindset for successful parenthood. It can help any parent develop a plan that meets both the needs of a new baby and of the entire family. These principles have worked for millions of parents and, when applied with common sense to your unique situation, can work wonderfully for you too! Recommended by doctors across the country.
"As a mom, I parented both ways. As a certified lactation educator, I know how discouraging it is to feed a baby around the clock with no appare
My mom and dad used this book with my sister and me and really loved it. It was cool to be reading it now for myself expecting my first kid :) I liked this book! A lot of helpful info. Still, I have no clue how to rate it this since it’s all about helping your baby sleep well. I, of course, don’t have a baby yet, so it’s a little early to confirm if it works. Maybe I’ll check back in a few months and adjust my rating based on how well it works lol.
Repetitive and wordy, with a definite "trust me bro" vibe rather than scientific or data-driven explanations. Overall seems like it has good ideas though.
I read this during my first pregnancy, once post-partum with my first (with additional frequent one-off references), during my second pregnancy, and I now have it under review with my second.
I would list this book as worth reading and keeping the ideas in the back of your mind. It is NOT a rulebook that will guarantee success if you follow it. I also wish the info was better organized.
- Feed, wake, sleep: I didn’t know anything about having a baby, though I understood a baby benefits from structure, so this book gave me that starting point. BUT, know that a baby under 3 months (maybe even longer?) will not fit into this pattern at all times, and it’s more important to feed your hungry child than try to make him/her nap while hungry. (Sound obvious? Wait until you’re a sleep-deprived Type A personality, and you’ll be surprised how you’re convinced that if you just follow a book’s directions, things will turn out well.)
- Feed, wake, sleep runs on 2 1/2- to 3-hour cycles: I had no idea how often a baby physically needed to eat; again the book gave me a starting point. BUT, know that breastfed babies often eat every two hours, and that babies under three months cluster-feed as often as every 45 minutes…and older babies still eat more frequently than every two hours in the evenings, and babies in growth spurts may eat more frequently (even waking up at night again), and… You get the idea?
For reference: Both my kids weaned themselves at 15/16-months and slept through the night beginning around 18-months. Both kids started dropping naps by age two—though daily rest time is still an institution in my house. Both kids obviously required the lesser end of the recommended sleep amounts, even with outdoor activities and vigorous play daily 😬 One is definitely a lighter sleeper, which added its own twists to the sleep journey. That’s just how it was. “Every child is different” is a better motto than “feed, wake, sleep.”
This is a reread from 17 years ago. I got a lot out of. I don’t necessarily believe everything in here 100% but it did help our son become a great sleeper and I needed a refresher for our daughter since we are having some sleep struggles.
Pretty much exactly what I already believed and planned to practice, summed up in a handy, well-organized little book.
Interested to see what happens with Nola, being a preemie and all, and her sleep as she gets older.
Really appreciated the introduction on the distinctions between attachment parenting, strict-schedule parenting, and PDF (Parent directed feeding, which is advocated by this book).
Also, chapter 1 is on the importance of a real, Christian marriage above all else. That's pretty revolutionary for a baby book.
Second read: Read it again before baby #2 and it was well worth the reread! Way easier to understand after having some context of what life is like with a baby. But also, just some super helpful tips!
First read: I wish I had read this before having Ryder because most of the tips in it were for newborns. But I still enjoyed the book and got a few tips from it!
Summary: On Becoming Babywise by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam is a parenting book that promotes a structured approach to infant care, emphasizing sleep training, feeding schedules, and the development of healthy sleep habits for babies. The book advocates for a predictable routine, recommending a flexible but consistent schedule for feeding, awake time, and naps. The goal is to help parents establish good sleep patterns early on, which is believed to benefit both the baby and the parents, providing more sleep and a smoother transition into toddlerhood. The method emphasizes parental control, with a focus on helping babies learn to self-soothe and fall asleep on their own.
Review: On Becoming Babywise has been praised by some parents for providing a clear and structured approach to infant care, particularly with respect to sleep training and creating routines. Many parents appreciate the sleep schedule suggestions, as it provides a sense of predictability and order. However, the book has also faced significant criticism, particularly regarding its approach to feeding schedules. Some critics argue that it can be too rigid, potentially leading to insufficient nourishment for infants or adding unnecessary stress for parents trying to adhere to the strict timelines. Additionally, the book’s emphasis on sleep training has been questioned, as not all babies respond to the method in the same way. While the book may be helpful for some, it’s important for parents to recognize that each baby is different, and flexibility may be key to their child’s well-being.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
At first, I loved this book because it provided my anxiety an "answer" but unfortunately, our pediatrician's office recommended baby 411, which rates this book as an "F" simply because of the expectations for newborns to be able to self soothe. These authors seem very judgemental of baby wearing, and much of the language feels harsh and critical of views that are not their own. The pros: offering a structure and some great information and charts in the appendices! Seriously that was the best part! I plan on keeping the book for the appendices - troubleshooting certain issues and having an actual paper chart will be nice to track feeding, poops, and wet diapers. Also the general idea that feed, wake, sleep should be the general idea of a structure for scheduling. That makes so much sense!
Overall- I'm a fan of sleep training and will implement some of these concepts, I think they just push it too soon with itty bitty babies and don't have a concept of the 4th trimester. I plan to use some of the concepts but with more flexibility and after the baby is a little older.
Practical, succinct information. I strongly appreciate how this book skips the fluff and provides clear, simple, straightforward help on a variety of parenting questions. Though its main focus is on infant schedules and how to use them to positively impact nighttime sleep (that's what I was looking for), the book also contains quick doses of help on many other topics. I found it very useful. The book's format should make it easy to refer back to in the future, which I'm sure I'll be doing. I wish someone had gifted me this book before I began having children! It has given me both more guidance and more confidence in what I'm doing with my newborn this time around.
Minus a partial star because it's missing guidance on what to do if your baby is not settling into the 3-hr eat, play, sleep cycle in terms of naps. It says a normal newborn naps 1.5-2 hours every nap, but doesn't instruct on what to do if your baby won't nap longer than 20 minutes when set down. There is some reassurance about allowing babies to cry when going down for naps, but the book doesn't address how to handle early wakeups in the early months. (Post 3 months, if they are successfully on the Babywise schedule, wakeups around 45 minutes into a nap are supposedly due to a struggle to connect sleep cycles, which it talks about.) More information here would be helpful!
I don't understand the controversy over this book! Maybe many years ago the book had some not so forward ideas that invited criticism. It gives a pretty solid reasoning for pdf or parent directed feeding which is a hybrid between feeding whenever the baby wants vs rigid scheduling. What initially attracted me to the book was how it started off with how feeding philosophy evolved in the last century. That gave me the impetus to continue reading. The advice on going from 8 to 3 feedings felt a little extra rigid but I think I get the spirit of what they're saying. I like the openness for bottle and breast. Somewhat surprised by references of just the mom feeding. Doesn't make sense if it's open to bottle/formula feeding. Very very surprised at how critical the internet is about this. The AAP controversy looks honestly uncalled for and is probably still being propagated by the tribe that says you have to nurse the baby when she gives you the slightest hunger cue.
Initially, I was really excited for this book and the prospect of more sleep corresponding with the age in weeks of our child (e.g. a 5 week old should be able to sleep for a 5 hour stretch, etc), only to find that the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) historically hasn't endorsed their methods as it has resulted in failure to thrive and dehydration in some infants: https://publications.aap.org/aapnews/...
Given this, we personally nixed the sleep advice from the book and stuck with what our pediatrician told us to do for sleep for our little one.
However, we have fully embraced the FEED-WAKE-SLEEP method discussed in this book and have created a schedule of at least 8 feeds to provide (while allowing common sense flexibility in being sure to feed him if he cues sooner than our scheduled time and resuming the scheduling thereafter, including waking him up for a feeding if needed). Doing this has provided structure and some predictability to our routine. Our little one continues to gain weight appropriately with this FEED-WAKE-SLEEP method and hopefully sets us up for success in the future so he doesn't depend on a feed to fall asleep.
I would recommend this book with caution, knowing that the AAP doesn't fully support its methods (the AAP sets guidelines and practice protocols which the majority of pediatricians follow).
Okay the new edition is SO MUCH BETTER than the old one. It needed a better editor because there are an unconscionable number of typos, BUT there's so much more info than the original edition. Loads of troubleshooting help as well as example schedules for all ages, explanations of merges, sleep needs for each age, etc. Wish I'd read this while still pregnant but either way super glad I have it now to refer back to whenever young Theodore seems ready for a schedule update. Plus I'm still obsessed with the principle in general. Having a kid who puts himself to sleep almost 100% of the time and takes long, chunky naps and sleeps through the night at 9 weeks and is therefore nearly always happy and smiling when awake is A+++ in my book.
I got this book when one of my twins suddenly wouldn't sleep unless held around 6 months adjusted. The methods were similar to those in the book that ultimately worked for us (Twelve Hours Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old by Suzy Giordano) but the methods in Babywise were much less flexible. Setting a timer and letting a baby cry it out for twenty minutes felt much too extreme and unnecessary. The strict order of when to eat, sleep, or play also didn't work for our family. I did appreciate the guidance on how feeding frequency gradually changes across the first year. I know lots of parents swear by this book, but I preferred the similar but gentler approach of Twelve Hours.
This book had a ton of great information, especially regarding getting your baby on a schedule. I started reading this book when my baby was a few weeks old and as soon as I started providing more structure and following the parent directed feeding and feed/wake/nap suggestions, my baby fell into a more predictable schedule and took better daytime naps. A bit of the information in the book was outdated (despite this being an updated 30th anniversary edition) and there were a few typos that were missed.
I'm only on chapter 2 and already so annoyed. There are so many writing errors that I am legitimately struggling to get through this book. Random capitalization, punctuation that makes no sense, and the rambling! Yikes! I can barely focus on the content because I get so distracted by the writing errors and have to skim to find the parts that are relevant. I'm disheartened I actually paid for this.
Did I find this book helpful? Yes. Did I follow it exactly? No. The whole first month when my baby wouldn’t stop crying, almost nothing in the book was helpful and the promises of a good sleeper were discouraging. Once she hit 1 month old, something clicked (or her digestive system started cooperating) and we were able to apply more of the principles in the book. Definitely a fan of sleep training early on, but we’ll see how it goes with future kids. 😂
A lot of the good information is pretty basic and intuitive, and the other information is outdated or a theory presented as fact with nothing to back it up. I did like the balanced approach the author takes when it comes to scheduling feedings and sleep times; He encourages something between a completely rigid and unstructured schedule.
Lots of useful information especially regarding the scheduled feedings and naps. I thrive on routine, habits, and schedules so the tips were very helpful. Overall, i didn't think the book flowed very well and could have been more concise on certain topics. I felt that it was a little difficult to read unless I really focused my attention on the text.
I really loved reading this book. I’m about to have my first baby, and it is really important to me to establish routine and predictability in our schedule, especially when it comes to feeding and sleep. I feel like this book gave me really great advice and guidelines to help get started. It was very easy to read and I feel a lot more prepared to bring home our baby in a few days.
I recommend reading this in the third trimester of pregnancy or first couple weeks after birth, as some of the information no longer applied to me and my 4 month old. Very helpful advice for managing your baby’s day to ensure good sleeping habits at night.
Prior to having a baby I felt overwhelmed and a bit bored by the content of this book. Now that my baby has arrived, I find the book in its entirety extremely applicable and helpful. No wonder it’s so widely read & it’s ideas adopted!
Going to try this for feeding/sleep. The book was easy to read and gave helpful examples. Although just spoke with 2 lactation consultants and they said this book is suggested against according to professionals.
A nice perspective on how to get a baby on a schedule, and may work for some but I felt a bit overwhelmed reading this book. Some of the chapters weren’t organized very well either. Had a bit of a condescending tone at times.