Texas Hold 'Em: How I Was Born in a Manger, Died in the Saddle, and Came Back as a Horny Toad

by Kinky Friedman

"Texas Hold 'Em is more than just a card game. It deals…with that fine, forgotten art of playing a poor hand well…Texas Hold 'Em is a state of mind, a spiritual survival technique, a way of holding on to things that might just be important in this ever-changing world." --from the introduction to Texas Hold 'Em

The irrepressible, future Governor of Texas is back with a crusade to stop the wussification of the Lone Star State. He never thought he'd see the day when he'd miss gun racks in the back windows of pickup trucks, but he almost does. He misses the days when cowboy shirts never had buttons and coffee with a friend was still a dime. Many of the stubborn, dusty, weather-beaten little towns, roads, trucks, jeeps, people and animals are gone now. Like it or not, the peaceful, scenic bucolic Hill Country of his childhood is being dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st Century.

His is at his outrageous best as he gives Americans a look at the state made famous by the Alamo, the armadillo, Willie Nelson, and, well, Kinky Friedman. Texas Hold 'Em is composed of provocative essays, including autobiographical pieces that are at times bittersweet and at other hilarious, profiles of such stellar Texans as his friend, Willie Nelson, as you've never seen him before, George W. Bush, and Racehorse Haynes, and a treasure trove of lists, quizzes , including:

If the Ten Commandments Were Written by a Texan
Tex My ride
Texas Firsts
What Kind of Texas Driver Are you?

As an added diversion, the book is decorated with cartoons by the brilliant John Callahan, particularly appealing to those whose lives are spiraling downward into tailspins of despair.

Texas Hold 'Em is the way in which the Kinkster plays the game of life. To him, Texas Hold' Em means holding on to what is dear to him, to the things that made him who he is, always remembering that the most important things in life aren't things. An old cowboy philosophy of life sums it up -- "hang on tight, spur hard, and let 'er buck."

Genres: Humor, Politics, Memoir, Nonfiction, History, Essays

240 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

About the author

Richard S. "Kinky" Friedman is an American singer, songwriter, novelist, humorist, politician and former columnist for Texas Monthly who styles himself in the mold of popular American satirists Will Rogers and Mark Twain. He was one of two independent candidates in the 2006 election for the office of Governor of Texas. Receiving 12.6% of the vote, Friedman placed fourth in the six-person race.

Friedman was born in Chicago to Jewish parents, Dr. S. Thomas Friedman and his wife Minnie (Samet) Friedman. The family moved to a ranch in central Texas a few years later. Friedman had an early interest in both music and chess, and was chosen at age 7 as one of 50 local players to challenge U.S. grandmaster Samuel Reshevsky to simultaneous matches in Houston. Reshevsky won all 50 matches, but Friedman was by far the youngest competitor.

Friedman graduated from Austin High School in Austin, Texas in 1962 and earned a Bachelor of Arts from the University of Texas at Austin in 1966, majoring in Psychology. He took part in the Plan II Honors program and was a member of the Tau Delta Phi fraternity. During his freshman year, Chinga Chavin gave Friedman the nickname "Kinky" because of his curly hair.

Friedman served two years in the United States Peace Corps, teaching on Borneo in Malaysia with John Gross. During his service in the Peace Corps, he met future Texas Jewboy road manager Dylan Ferrero, with whom he still works today. Friedman lives at Echo Hill Ranch, his family's summer camp near Kerrville, Texas. He founded Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch, also located near Kerrville, whose mission is to care for stray, abused and aging animals; more than 1,000 dogs have been saved from animal euthanasia.

Series:
* Kinky Friedman Mystery

Reviews

[Monica · Rating 2 out of 5]

Kinky is Kinky and there are always some gems in a lot of filler, but you got to love him and how would you not pick up a Kinky if you come across one? Especially in a foreign book store in the 2 for 5 euros section. This is Kinky waxing lyrical about Texas. Googled him and happy to see that the old Jewish Cowboy is still alive and kicking. And thank you Kinkster (Kinky's own self-endearing term for himself) for helping me catch up with my book reading, for I am lagging behind. And now onto some serious reading. : )

[Angel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I finally picked it up after having it sitting on my shelf for a few days. I was hoping to finish the Foxes in the Henhouse book before picking this one up, but I could not resist the call of Kinky's book.

* * * *

I finally finished reading it. I found myself liking this book. It has a nice blend of heartwarming, humor in various forms, and some moving and thoughtful moments. Kinky can go from funny as hell to downright philosophical from one page to the next. This is a book that you can read a little at a time, or you can browse and find sections you like. The way he writes about places in Texas makes me want to get in the car and travel to see some of the sights. Overall, this was a good read.

[Kevin Stilley · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you are from Texas, conservative and liberal, religious and irreligious, sane and insane, you love this Texas Jewboy. This is almost certainly the most unusual political "campaign" book ever written -- and it was a thoroughly enjoyable read like all his books.

[Rolf · Rating 3 out of 5]

While I find Kinky Friedman somewhat charming, that charm has its limits. This is more a collection of op-eds and lists than a book, and it doesn’t really hold together, but it feels more comparable to an interesting afternoons spent hanging out with a real Texas character.

[Doug Robinson · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my humor.. and I'm not a cowboy.. or from Texas.... I know some love it.. which is great!.. different strokes

[Elsie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short chapters with Kinky's satirical and irreverent humor.

[Hilary "Fox" · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked up Texas Hold 'em by pure chance while at the library, and eagerly jumped into it as I enjoyed The Great Psychedelic Armadillo Picnic. Texas Hold 'em did not disappoint me.

A bit of the material within the book was gleaned directly out of the previous one, but this did not greatly disappoint me. It only made the new material more noteworthy. The illustrations by John Callahan were ridiculous and decidedly not politically correct which added to the overall fun feel of the book itself.

I look forward to reading more of Kinky's books. What sets him apart from other humorists are the few thoughtful stories interspersed throughout the ridiculous tales. In this case, the story of Lottie at the end of the book was worth all 200+ pages.

[Cvplummer · Rating 2 out of 5]

I don't know how this ended up in my possession.. but, it has been in a stack of books next to my bed for about two years.. Finally I got around to reading it... I do have to say that the "concept" of Kinky Friedman is quite endearing to the American spirt-- a jewish cowboy, birthed from the aftermath of the hippies and filling a void for Texans who have that true spirit of independence in a state dominated by big business and Republicans. However, this was kinda thin.. kinda just rambling second-rate stand-up comedian bits.. there were some good nuggets.. but sometimes it was just got a little tedious, and for those of us outside of texas, a few too many inside jokes.

[Kathy · Rating 3 out of 5]

From a blog post I wrote in 2005:

Nope, it isn't about my favorite Poker game, Texas Hold 'Em is a book by Kinky Friedman. It's another one of his collections of stories about his life, family and friends and acquaintances. If my list of familiars included Willie Nelson, Pat Green, Bill Clinton and W and Laura Bush, I'd be writing a book, too. (Though I probably wouldn't mention W.)

Fun read - the Kinkster is always entertaining and I hope he does well in his pursuit of the Governor's office in Texas.

[Ron Wallace · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fun from the start, I laughed out loud at times. Texas should have elected Kinky as governor; he's smart and knows how to manuever the world around. The book is one great story after another. Southern Living magazine called him the new Mark Twain, and I'm inclined to agree. The man's a genius; I'd almost move to Texas to vote for him if he runs again.

[Jayne · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's kind of a political biography but it's more a series of anecdotes.

There's something to be said for someone who runs for governorship whose campaigne slogan is, 'Why the hell not?' and their their platform is 'to fight the wussification of this great state.'

If nothing else it's entertaining reading.

[Mary Brock · Rating 3 out of 5]

"How I Was Born......" was ritten during the time that Friedman was contemplating running for governor. Kinky is a monster word smith with a unique way of looking at Texas. His collection of essays includes lots of biographical wistfulness. He includes his view of "Texasisms". Kinky is really funny, irreverent, and a touch of outrageous. I laughed in some spots and cringed in spots.

[Lee Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

funny but not much new. Just a rehash of his older stuff. “You have reached a new level of political correctness, even lower than your last record.” Laura Bush. It's good for Kinky fans. I sent it to my grandmother.

[Renie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A collection of down-home vignettes by Kinky Friedman...enjoyable in it's own right. I chuckled out loud at a couple of the phrasings as well as the colorful vocabulary found in this set of Texas country boy musings.

[Star Valdez · Rating 3 out of 5]

FUNNY. (whistle wetting, country-isms, chuckles.)

[Sterlingcindysu · Rating 2 out of 5]

Short autobiography of a former country music star who was running for governor of Texas. Quick read. Title refers to the act of holding on to what is important to you.

[Clif Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Can't resist a Kinky, even one that is a bit dated.
Not your typical Black Hat, cigar smoking Kinkster mystery. It's a funny collection of articles and nonsense by the pre-governor candidate.

[Ashlea (plotdriven.com) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not his best book (for that, I'd pick one of the mystery novels) but quintessentially Kinky.

[TK Keanini · Rating 5 out of 5]

Required reading for when I moved to Austin.

[Damon Gulczynski]

Not bad so far.

[Sara Goldenberg · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have ready just about all his books. I like most of them.

However, after you read a few of them, you will see whole parts repeat themselves; I guess for the new readers. It's pretty tiresome.

So, in this spirit, I will post this exact review on each of his books that I recently read.