Only My Horses Know: Hope and Horses Book 1

by Cinda Bauman

Life on a Montana horse ranch has always been the best for twelve-year-old Kylie Hannigan. She bonds with the horses, rides them with her friend Joey, and helps her mom train them. Plus she barrel races her favorite horse, Kiwi, and with plenty of practice and grit, they will definitely beat her rival Olivia this year. But then , something starts happening with Kylie’s mom. She sleeps all the time, and Kylie has to do the chores, the training, and all the care for the horses--and it’s too much! At least it’s summer, so she doesn’t have to worry about school, and she can spend time talking to her favorite animals. One day, a strange-behaving horse with an even stranger name shows up for training but is only ignored by Kylie’s mom. Training a difficult horse used to be a fun challenge Kylie could share with her mom, but that’s not even happening now. Then her mom changes again, and she’s up doing everything—including cooking and cleaning in the middle of the night. Kylie still gets no rest because Mom thinks Kylie should be able to do it all, too. So when school starts and Mom’s behavior goes back and forth and back and forth, and then embarrasses Kylie in front of Joey more times than she can count, Kylie decides the only thing she can do is hide everything from everyone—except her horses. Kylie’s life spins out of control along with her mom’s. She can’t train for the barrel races with Kiwi or keep up with homework or talk to her best friend. What will it take to get her life back to the way it used to be? Or is that even possible?

217 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 19, 2021

Reviews

[Kristine L. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kylie Hannigan is being held prisoner by a secret. It's a secret she only shares with her horses.

Once upon a time, the twelve year-old and her horse trainer mom dreamed of starting a rescue horse ranch. But that dream has gone up in smoke as Mom’s behavior has become so erratic, Kylie barely recognizes her. She doesn’t understand why her mom’s acting so weird. It’s embarrassing.

When Mom quits taking an interest in the horses, Kylie knows something is wrong. Something BIG. But what? How can she find out? Who can she talk to? Or should she?

Kylie can’t even talk to Joey ”the human vacuum cleaner” McLagan, her neighbor and best friend since childhood. But if Kylie doesn’t speak up to another person, who’s going to help Mom? How long will fear and shame keep Kylie captive? As Kylie’s life begins to spin out of control, she wonders if she’ll ever feel safe again. Will her life ever get back on track? How?

This gentle faith-flavored story has it all: Friendship. Family. Faith. Conflict and despair. Hope and triumph. A horse named Dragonfly. A “Calf-A-Thon.” A welcoming whinny and the promise of spring sunshine. Community. “God’ll send you a team.” It tackles a tough subject – a parent with mental illness – with sensitivity, sagacity, and authenticity.

Briskly paced with a plot as nimble as a barrel racer, each chapter glides seamlessly into the next. The story is well thought out and features finely crafted characters, realistic tensions and genuine questions. Dialogue and action are carefully balanced, effectively grabbing and keeping the reader’s attention throughout. Besides. Fresh-from-the-oven chocolate chip cookies “topped with vanilla ice cream, whipped topping and chocolate syrup”? (Chapter 31) Who can pass that up?

Oh. About that dream? Maybe Kylie and her parents can use their work with horses to help others…? Cuz you never know what’ll happen when you let God take the reins.

You don’t have to be a horse lover or a middle schooler to enjoy this wonderful, uplifting story with a timely message. I loved this book! Didn’t want it to end. Indeed, Only My Horses Know is a rich, rewarding read for anyone who enjoys a sturdy story well told. It’s an outstanding achievement for a debut novel.

Only My Horses Know is book one in the Hope and Horses series.  Can’t wait for the next one!

[Crystal Otto · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every parent knows reading is important for children. At our house, reading is quite the family affair. Once you're old enough to read on your own, you'll be asked to write a review for mom's blog or a note to the author. When you're little and need help reading, mom will have you sit with her in the fluffy rocking chair where you'll enjoy stories before bed. Sometimes we read short stories and get through several of them each night. Sometimes we stop at our local book store and choose a book that can take us on an adventure lasting months. Regardless of your age, you'll be asked to share your thoughts and ideas about whatever book you're reading. You'll be asked to grab a book to take in the van, a book to read in the orthodontist waiting room, a book for the beach, a book for the tub, a book for beside the bed. The truth is - there are books in every single room of our house, and Grammy Patty is gracious enough to store the overflow in her attic (which is incredibly fun to explore in as well).

I'm sharing the back story so you can fully understand what a compliment it is when we say:

Only My Horses Know can be found next to the couch in the living room. We've read each page at least once, and yet have decided this book cannot possibly be stored away. It will be enjoyed again and again by children of all ages. When the book arrived in the post, something magical happened. We opened the packaging and Eudora (3) said to Delphine (6) "look what mommy got for me!" and she was excited how the book looked. I like to say in my head 'score 1 for mom' when that happens!

The next afternoon was rainy, and the children asked if we could start reading Only My Horses Know and as a horse loving family, we were drawn into the unpredictable story of Kylie's life on her Montana horse ranch. The children were so excited to chat with our neighbor Christine about this book because she had also grown up on a ranch on Montana and had her own horse stories to share.

This delightful book has sparked many conversations and has provided hours of joy and bonding - absolutely 5 stars as far as our family is concerned!

[A.J. Kormon · Rating 5 out of 5]

This faith-based middle grade novel is the first book in the Hope and Horses series and tackles the important subject of mental illness. Kylie is confused by her mom’s behaviour. One week she’s sleeping all day then the next she’s staying up all night and spending money she doesn’t have on things she doesn't need. All while this is going on, poor Kylie is forced to take over her mother’s duties at home and training the horses on the farm.

What I enjoyed most about this book is how it showed that even when Kylie thought she was alone (even her faith in God had been tested) she wasn’t. She just didn’t know how to ask for help--a common occurrence when people are dealing with their own mental health or the mental health of someone close to them. It’s so difficult when someone you know isn’t acting like themselves. This book shines a light on the importance of speaking up and having candid discussions about mental illness.

[Brittany · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book! I think everyone has had at least one of the issues that Kylie is experiencing. Whether it be the fear of friends finding out, the struggle in an important friendship, or the stigma of having or knowing someone with mental illness. This book does a great job at touching on sensitive subjects with a kind and knowledgeable heart.

[Roxanne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good read

This is a very good book exploring how a preteen might handle a crisis at home and ways for them to get help.