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348 pages, Paperback
First published January 26, 2021
“No war can take place without love. Be it love for a person, love for power, love for money, love for a nation.”
“Knowledge without wisdom often leads to a misuse of power.”
“Failure was always due to a lack of focus. With enough attention and preparation, no outcome could not be predicted, and no situation could not be overcome.”
“A true hero acts not on impulse, but on rationale and consideration.”
“Weapons are not dangerous,” said the goddess as she slid her Monk into place. “Nor is a man with a weapon. A person’s skill and intent are the real danger.”
“Mistakes are like wrinkles,” Natsuko said as she snapped together the last few pieces of the game and put them away in her pouch. “The older we get, the more we have, and we forget them until we look in a mirror.”
“The first step toward winning is knowing which game you are playing.”
“Mistakes are like wrinkles…The older we get, the more we have, and we forget them until we look in a mirror.”
“There is a propensity to confuse heroism with rash action. They are not the same. A true hero acts not on impulse, but on rationale and consideration.”
"No plan is solid enough to withstand both the cunning of one's enemy and the ineptitude of one's allies."
And when a war is finally laid to rest, as all wars must be, it is remembered by those it has delivered, and by those it has destroyed.
1.5 Stars
I give up on this authors' books.
🖤
So one day right, Chicken Licken is minding his own business going about his day and BAM! an Acorn falls on his head. C. L gets it into his head that the sky is falling down and has to tell the King...and so begins our story:
Enter Yuu's Chicken Licken adventure.
Annnnnnd scence!!!!
Playing a game of chess. Hello, here's a god. Ms. Missed Opportunities and Lost things.
📍Proposal: Let's play Squid game (jokes). But for real. The gods are all in a game, we need to kick the war god out cos he's way too good at being a war god -I feel like there's a joke there somewhere but no one was laughing 😔 -Be my champion? Become the Art of War again?
Hold on🤔. Sun Tzu is that you?
📍Counter Proposal: I miss the Steel Prince. I killed him. Bring him back?
Me: 🤔That's not what happened. I read Never Die
*this book is a standalone and can be read without knowing what happens in the first book*
📍Counter counter proposal: Cackling...even more cackling. Yeah sure. I'll give you what you lost back.
💡 You know, for someone that was all "Words were like rules. They mattered far more than people realised. Their meaning could be abstract or exact...", Yuu was suspiciously dim in not picking up on Natsuko obvious vague wording on that promise. I'm no Sherlock but even i could see through that.
But🤷🏾♂️, thanks to that, our adventure begins.
🖤🖤
Scene 2:
On the way Chicken Licken meets Henny Penny. Good Morning Chicken Licken said Henny Penny, where are you off to in such a hurry? Chicken Licken says: I'm on my way to tell the King that the sky is falling down. Then i'd better come with you said Henny Penny. So Chicken Licken and Henny Penny set off to tell the King that the sky is falling down
Where's the artefact Natsuko? Wait, I need to cackle. *cackle, cackle cackle*
Introducing🥁🥁🥁 Li Bang🎉🥳 Possy no 1 or is this Henny Penny?
Anyway........
*fight fight fight*
I am the Art of War and strategy is my game.
*sure* *sure* Not like anyone who is super smart can't you know, think up strategies but sure.
Acquired: first artefact✔️
🖤🖤🖤
Scene 3:
On the way Chicken Licken & Henny Penny meet Cocky Lucky. Good Morning Chicken Licken said Cocky Lucky, where are you off to in such a hurry? Chicken Licken says: We're on our way to tell the King that the sky is falling down. Then i'd better come with you said Cocky Lucky. So Chicken Licken, Henny Penny & Cocky Lucky set off to tell the King that the sky is falling down
Time for the Art of War to strategise:
*inconsequential talk about monks being crooks. Religion is a scam y'all.* How positively enlightening.
💡 Is it a fantasy book if religion doesn't show up?
Yuu our brilliant strategist thinks up a plan: Ummm. hi Fang. Steal the artefact for me? You being a thief and all?
Let's have sex.
*fight fight fight*
Natsuko cackles
Oh no double crossed by Fang, a thief. we're shocked. Absolutely, positively shocked we are😱😱😱.
🖤
Interlude
💡Random: You would think military commanders would know how to ummm, you know plan a strategy to win a war, being in charge of an army and all but have no fear the Art of War is here.
*strategy strategy strategy*
WE WON!!!!
🖤🖤
Scene 4:
On the way Chicken Licken, Henny Penny & Cocky Lucky meet Ducky Lucky Good Morning Chicken Licken said Ducky Lucky... Ahh fuck it. I'm tired
*Exactly like Chicken Licken Story, the repetitiveness continues all the up until the final test*
Anyway's there's a whole bunch of fighting - which is cool I guess, seeing as that's really the bulk of the book - cackling, moaning about wanting the steel prince back, moaning about not wanting to be the Art of War, stories about where all the lost things come from, strategizing which honestly, any ingenious person could overcome but putting in someone called the Art of War sounds cooler I guess.
All in all, as much as I like torturing myself in the name of trying new authors, I am completely convinced that Hayes is not a writer whose books I'm ever going to enjoy - and at this point, I'm starting to seem like a hater. I find his plots lacking, his prose especially in the context of Chinese wuxia extremely inadequate; honestly felt like someone was running nails in my brain every time someone said "arsehole" or "fuck" or "bitch" but then again, maybe it's entirely plausible that people within that context would talk like that 🤷🏾♂️, his characters uninteresting, the repetition in this book insanely bad and if someone says the word "Cackle" to me right now, I might bash the person's head in.
Why did no one warn me? 😭😭😭😭😭
This book was so not it ❌
Nice cover though.
