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The Louder I Will Sing: A story of racism, riots and redemption
On 28th September 1985, Lee Lawrence's mother Cherry Groce was wrongly shot by police during a raid on her Brixton home. The bullet shattered her spine and she never walked again. In the chaos that followed, 11-year-old Lee watched in horror as the News falsely pronounced his mother dead. In Brixton, already a powder keg because of the deep racism that the community was experiencing, it was the spark needed to trigger two days of rioting that saw buildings brought down by petrol bombs, cars torched and shops looted.The Louder I Will Sing is a powerful, compelling and uplifting memoir about growing up in modern Britain as a young Black man. It's a story both of people and politics, of the underlying racism beneath many of our most important institutions, but also the positive power that hope, faith and love can bring in response.
272 pages, Paperback
First published September 17, 2020
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 104 reviews
August 13, 2022
detailed book detailing the family journey for justice after the shooting of Cherry Groce in a police raid in Brixton 1985 with a before and after the author's mother (Cherry) death and the process of trying to obtain answers and how the police tried to block and the overall ingrained Racism of the system.
January 12, 2021
I found this book so moving, I knew a little about the case and a bit more about the riots , but this account, the story of Lee and his mother Cherry and everything they went through brings the true face and emotions to the time and events. I learned so much more from this than I ever learnt from school or text books. This is a powerful read, heartbreaking and shows how long the journey towards any kind of justice is, even when still fighting for it. An interesting and moving must read, for your own education
Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for a free copy for an honest opinion
Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for a free copy for an honest opinion
January 16, 2021
This is not an easy read but nor should it be. Lee Lawrence has written not only a powerful memoir but highlighted the institutionalised racism engrained into British society.
Although this book tells of a truly heartbreaking experience, Lawrence's determination for justice and faith in the goodness of people is inspiring.
Although this book tells of a truly heartbreaking experience, Lawrence's determination for justice and faith in the goodness of people is inspiring.
May 20, 2021
What an incredible account of a dignified response to a family tragedy. Lee Lawrence fought his family's corner against institutional racism and still had the compassion to try and turn the outcome into a positive contribution to society.
June 29, 2024
A moving and instructive account of the repercussions of a UK police officer shooting an innocent black mother told by her son. Long before George Floyd was a familiar name from the USA Cherry Groce was left paralysed in her own home in London as a result of a police raid. Her son Lee Lawrence tells us of the struggle of her family to seek justice and to be treated with respect, equity and fairness. Well written and, in parts, as satisfying and jaw-dropping as a really good novel: maybe that sounds crass but I feel it's a measure of how powerful this book is.
November 25, 2021
A must read!
I felt so many emotions reading this. Mostly I was reeling with anger at just how badly black people are treated in this country. I can’t imagine how frustrating it is to have so many disadvantages and prejudices against you simply because of skin colour, but this book does a great job of giving some perspective.
Lee’s recount of his life growing up in Brixton is so compelling and beautifully told. He has done his mother so proud with this book.
I felt so many emotions reading this. Mostly I was reeling with anger at just how badly black people are treated in this country. I can’t imagine how frustrating it is to have so many disadvantages and prejudices against you simply because of skin colour, but this book does a great job of giving some perspective.
Lee’s recount of his life growing up in Brixton is so compelling and beautifully told. He has done his mother so proud with this book.
January 5, 2025
Getting through and finishing this was very emotional. We see so much BLM activity coming from the States that it can be easy to think racism is their problem and that we're all alright here. This is about Cherry Groce's family and life, right on my doorstep in my community, about events which unfolded within and not long before my lifetime. This is a must-read for everyone, eye-opening to events and issues we should all be aware of.
August 26, 2021
This one was really, really hard to read.
This is the memoir of Lee Lawrence, and his fight for the police to take accountability following an officer’s unlawful shooting of his unarmed mother, Cherry Grose, in their Brixton home in 1985. She ended up paraplegic and eventually died as a result of her injuries in 2011.
From a medical perspective, reading about Lee’s mum’s deteriorating health, paraplegia, lack of legal aid and the medical malpractice involved made me reflect a lot about my Dad - who was rendered quadriplegic following an accident at work - and the legal and medical battles we fought and lost on his behalf. He died not long ago, also of kidney failure that was directly related to his injuries, and reading this brought a lot up. Especially when reading about the day to day impact on Cherry’s life; the little things that able-bodied people and those who have never had to care for the physically disabled take for granted.
I felt so guilty about almost not finishing this, because this is such an incredibly important book with such a powerful message about the nature and lived experiences of police brutality and racial struggles in the UK. Although it did make me reflect on my Dad’s untimely demise, I am fully aware that his issues were not a result of police brutality and that racial discrimination is the underlying core element of Cherry’s story. In an attempt to not whitewash the narrative, I tried to focus even more than I usually would on reading more objectively, with the aim of further educating myself on becoming a better ally. However, personally and intimately knowing the pain of watching a parent deteriorate and then watching the system fail them brought back all the familiar heartbreak and anger.
Overall, I am so glad that I ended up being able to finish it. Lawrence has some remarkable insights, not only regarding his own experiences but also related to the murders of Stephen Lawrence and George Floyd. I’d also recommend listening to the audiobook of this, as at the end there is a really illuminating interview.
This is the memoir of Lee Lawrence, and his fight for the police to take accountability following an officer’s unlawful shooting of his unarmed mother, Cherry Grose, in their Brixton home in 1985. She ended up paraplegic and eventually died as a result of her injuries in 2011.
From a medical perspective, reading about Lee’s mum’s deteriorating health, paraplegia, lack of legal aid and the medical malpractice involved made me reflect a lot about my Dad - who was rendered quadriplegic following an accident at work - and the legal and medical battles we fought and lost on his behalf. He died not long ago, also of kidney failure that was directly related to his injuries, and reading this brought a lot up. Especially when reading about the day to day impact on Cherry’s life; the little things that able-bodied people and those who have never had to care for the physically disabled take for granted.
I felt so guilty about almost not finishing this, because this is such an incredibly important book with such a powerful message about the nature and lived experiences of police brutality and racial struggles in the UK. Although it did make me reflect on my Dad’s untimely demise, I am fully aware that his issues were not a result of police brutality and that racial discrimination is the underlying core element of Cherry’s story. In an attempt to not whitewash the narrative, I tried to focus even more than I usually would on reading more objectively, with the aim of further educating myself on becoming a better ally. However, personally and intimately knowing the pain of watching a parent deteriorate and then watching the system fail them brought back all the familiar heartbreak and anger.
Overall, I am so glad that I ended up being able to finish it. Lawrence has some remarkable insights, not only regarding his own experiences but also related to the murders of Stephen Lawrence and George Floyd. I’d also recommend listening to the audiobook of this, as at the end there is a really illuminating interview.
June 20, 2021
Part memoir, part reflection on the institutionalised racism of the police force, Lee Lawrence takes us through not only the story of what happened to his mother, but his fight for justice following her death.
It is a fight for justice, but also about giving his mother the opportunity to have a real day in court even after her death. The fact she was mistakenly shot by police looking for someone else draws such parallels with Breonna Taylor in the US. The fact that the Met say their police practice has changed since 1985 isn't a huge comfort I'm sure to Black families who know the risk to their life remains higher than their white neighbours.
Yes there are clear issues which remain in the police force (and of course wider society) but Lee Lawrence isn't trying to tear down the institution. The key point of his fight was accountability. Making someone take responsibility for the actions which left his mum paralysed, and then killed her. Yes, it is easy to say ACAB.. But it is harder to stand up against the police and fight when you know they are wrong and come away with justice. Absolutely outstanding.
It is a fight for justice, but also about giving his mother the opportunity to have a real day in court even after her death. The fact she was mistakenly shot by police looking for someone else draws such parallels with Breonna Taylor in the US. The fact that the Met say their police practice has changed since 1985 isn't a huge comfort I'm sure to Black families who know the risk to their life remains higher than their white neighbours.
Yes there are clear issues which remain in the police force (and of course wider society) but Lee Lawrence isn't trying to tear down the institution. The key point of his fight was accountability. Making someone take responsibility for the actions which left his mum paralysed, and then killed her. Yes, it is easy to say ACAB.. But it is harder to stand up against the police and fight when you know they are wrong and come away with justice. Absolutely outstanding.
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October 23, 2022Inspirational memoir of one man's quest for justice
This is written by Lee Lawrence, the then nine-year-old son of Cherry Groce, who was shot by an armed policeman in front of her children. As well as a crime story, it also works well as an autobiography.
I enjoyed reading about his journey through the various courts, up against snooty judges and posh lawyers. The attitude of the police to black communities is starkly revealed.
The incident set off riot coming as it did after the Brixton riots and the deaths of black teenagers in New Cross. The racism of the British press was highlighted in their headlines after a demonstration about the tragedy, 'A Black Day in Blackfriars', Blackfriars Bridge being where a battle against the police took place by some of the demonstrators.
This is written by Lee Lawrence, the then nine-year-old son of Cherry Groce, who was shot by an armed policeman in front of her children. As well as a crime story, it also works well as an autobiography.
I enjoyed reading about his journey through the various courts, up against snooty judges and posh lawyers. The attitude of the police to black communities is starkly revealed.
The incident set off riot coming as it did after the Brixton riots and the deaths of black teenagers in New Cross. The racism of the British press was highlighted in their headlines after a demonstration about the tragedy, 'A Black Day in Blackfriars', Blackfriars Bridge being where a battle against the police took place by some of the demonstrators.
December 22, 2021
I had it in my hands: incontrovertible proof that, over two and a half decades after my mum had been shot by a policeman, his bullet had resulted in the end of her life. The pent-up need for action sat in my throat like a stone that was on fire.
This is the memoir of Lee Lawrence and his fight for the police to take accountability following an officer’s unlawful shooting of his unarmed mother, Cherry Grose, in their Brixton home in 1985. She ended up paraplegic and eventually died in 2011 as a result of her injuries1.
Part memoir, part reflection on the institutionalised racism of the police force, and part love letter to London and most specifically, the community of Brixton, Lawrence writes in chapters titled “Before” and “After”, which adds to the decades long fight he faced to receive justice for his mother. Sometimes this felt a bit disjointed in the narrative as I lost track with the chronology of events, but it gave a good pace to the novel as you understood the magnitude of what happened and what he was subsequently coming up against in the Metropolitan Police.
Lawrence totally lost his childhood to this event - from spending every evening after school at his mothers hospital bedside, to becoming her official carer in his young adult life, and being the backbone for the rest of his family when other male figures were so lacking.
Indeed, it is truly unfathomable to put yourself in his shoes - to continually come up against an entire institution that is so deeply rooted in racism and prejudice, and to continue that fight. To never back down, give up or lose the sense of purpose. At so many turns Lawrence and his family were failed - from the instant she was shot where therapy wasn’t even offered as a courtesy, right up until her passing when he was continually refused legal aid, it is all the more remarkable that Lawrence not only made an honest living for himself (where most would lose all faith in the foundations of our society) but that he was able to continue this life long quest for justice.
It was all the serendipitous moments that made this happen that really gripped me. The what ifs that dictated so much of this family's fate, both before and after the event and how, had it not been for a detailed postmortem, this case would perhaps never have had a second hearing, thirty years later.
There are historical references throughout as Lawrence unpicks the history of racism within this country which, if you have not read up on this already, provides a good context to understanding the time in which he was coming of age. The focus on the Stephen Lawrence case was particularly moving as you saw the parallels between Lee and Stephen, and how unbearably triggering this must have been for him as a young black man growing up in London with the very real effects of racism, and an unfit for purpose police force, shadowing his existence.
Perhaps nitpicking, I found the choice not to use speech marks a little odd and didn’t flow as well with this style of memoir. It almost stripped some of the personalisation to the retelling, but perhaps that was also the point - reading it in such a clinical sense provided the sobering reality of what had happened and the lack of compassion Lawrence was so often faced with. I also found some gang references and the notion of “code of conducts” a little off, as although it's important to provide context, I felt it slightly took away from the wider picture.
The end of this story is really inspiring, with Lawrence’s work in mediation and restorative justice simply incredible and really shows his strength of character. I would have liked details within the epilogue to have been included throughout the novel, rather than added as a footnote at the end as it includes beautiful details of who his mother really was, so make sure you don’t skip it!
Ultimately, I am deeply grateful for Lee and his family - for sharing their story so bravely and openly, for refusing to give up the fight no matter the cost, and for showing us all that pursuing what is right in a just cause is always a battle worth taking. I hope somewhere Cherry is doing what she loved most; dancing to her favourite music, proud of the remarkable man she raised.
This is the memoir of Lee Lawrence and his fight for the police to take accountability following an officer’s unlawful shooting of his unarmed mother, Cherry Grose, in their Brixton home in 1985. She ended up paraplegic and eventually died in 2011 as a result of her injuries1.
Part memoir, part reflection on the institutionalised racism of the police force, and part love letter to London and most specifically, the community of Brixton, Lawrence writes in chapters titled “Before” and “After”, which adds to the decades long fight he faced to receive justice for his mother. Sometimes this felt a bit disjointed in the narrative as I lost track with the chronology of events, but it gave a good pace to the novel as you understood the magnitude of what happened and what he was subsequently coming up against in the Metropolitan Police.
Lawrence totally lost his childhood to this event - from spending every evening after school at his mothers hospital bedside, to becoming her official carer in his young adult life, and being the backbone for the rest of his family when other male figures were so lacking.
Indeed, it is truly unfathomable to put yourself in his shoes - to continually come up against an entire institution that is so deeply rooted in racism and prejudice, and to continue that fight. To never back down, give up or lose the sense of purpose. At so many turns Lawrence and his family were failed - from the instant she was shot where therapy wasn’t even offered as a courtesy, right up until her passing when he was continually refused legal aid, it is all the more remarkable that Lawrence not only made an honest living for himself (where most would lose all faith in the foundations of our society) but that he was able to continue this life long quest for justice.
It was all the serendipitous moments that made this happen that really gripped me. The what ifs that dictated so much of this family's fate, both before and after the event and how, had it not been for a detailed postmortem, this case would perhaps never have had a second hearing, thirty years later.
There are historical references throughout as Lawrence unpicks the history of racism within this country which, if you have not read up on this already, provides a good context to understanding the time in which he was coming of age. The focus on the Stephen Lawrence case was particularly moving as you saw the parallels between Lee and Stephen, and how unbearably triggering this must have been for him as a young black man growing up in London with the very real effects of racism, and an unfit for purpose police force, shadowing his existence.
Perhaps nitpicking, I found the choice not to use speech marks a little odd and didn’t flow as well with this style of memoir. It almost stripped some of the personalisation to the retelling, but perhaps that was also the point - reading it in such a clinical sense provided the sobering reality of what had happened and the lack of compassion Lawrence was so often faced with. I also found some gang references and the notion of “code of conducts” a little off, as although it's important to provide context, I felt it slightly took away from the wider picture.
The end of this story is really inspiring, with Lawrence’s work in mediation and restorative justice simply incredible and really shows his strength of character. I would have liked details within the epilogue to have been included throughout the novel, rather than added as a footnote at the end as it includes beautiful details of who his mother really was, so make sure you don’t skip it!
Ultimately, I am deeply grateful for Lee and his family - for sharing their story so bravely and openly, for refusing to give up the fight no matter the cost, and for showing us all that pursuing what is right in a just cause is always a battle worth taking. I hope somewhere Cherry is doing what she loved most; dancing to her favourite music, proud of the remarkable man she raised.
October 28, 2024
The Louder I Will Sing’, a valuable, engrossing and moving memoir. It tells the story of a fractured family being lifted by a wholesome, spirited and united community, and sheds light on the depth of racism embedded in the UK.
Lee Lawrence’s account of resilience in the face of adversity made me feel a whirlwind of emotions.
In the UK racism and injustice by the hands of powerful institutions are things which are minimised and too often compared to the US. I knew about the tragic shooting of Cherry Groce in the 80s, as my family actively discuss cases like such. However, reading Lawrence’s first-hand account of his mother’s shooting and life in London as a black person, was triggering yet there were moments I felt a sense of pride and honour.
Lawrence skilfully transports his readers to and from the 80s. He sets each scene so perfectly, with intricate details that immerse you into the scene. The influence music plays on Lee Lawrence’s childhood and memories of his mother is something relatable for many black people. Lee Lawrence kindly shares with his readers that his mum was a music lover, and her dancing was a memory imprinted in his mind. “Put the needle on a record, let the music feel the room and shade come alive.” Music brings us together, gives us hope and happiness, and reading about these cherished memories made me feel connected to Lee and his family.
Inspector Love robbed a part of Cherry Groce’s identity and ultimately her time on earth. It saddened me to read that the fight for recognition and justice for what the metropolitan police allowed to happen to a black woman and her family, was a strenuous struggle. In spite of this, Lawrence has turned tragedy into a tremendous opportunity to educate others and improve the lives of those with disabilities.
“A sense of belonging. Community. Power.”
Lee Lawrence’s account of resilience in the face of adversity made me feel a whirlwind of emotions.
In the UK racism and injustice by the hands of powerful institutions are things which are minimised and too often compared to the US. I knew about the tragic shooting of Cherry Groce in the 80s, as my family actively discuss cases like such. However, reading Lawrence’s first-hand account of his mother’s shooting and life in London as a black person, was triggering yet there were moments I felt a sense of pride and honour.
Lawrence skilfully transports his readers to and from the 80s. He sets each scene so perfectly, with intricate details that immerse you into the scene. The influence music plays on Lee Lawrence’s childhood and memories of his mother is something relatable for many black people. Lee Lawrence kindly shares with his readers that his mum was a music lover, and her dancing was a memory imprinted in his mind. “Put the needle on a record, let the music feel the room and shade come alive.” Music brings us together, gives us hope and happiness, and reading about these cherished memories made me feel connected to Lee and his family.
Inspector Love robbed a part of Cherry Groce’s identity and ultimately her time on earth. It saddened me to read that the fight for recognition and justice for what the metropolitan police allowed to happen to a black woman and her family, was a strenuous struggle. In spite of this, Lawrence has turned tragedy into a tremendous opportunity to educate others and improve the lives of those with disabilities.
“A sense of belonging. Community. Power.”
December 7, 2021
Infuriating and distressing but such a valuable read.
October 5, 2025
Skremmende memoar om forfatterens forhold til politiet, rasisme og kampen for rettferdighet. Likte godt oppbyggningen av boka hvor vi følger livet til forfatteren før og etter at politiet skøyt moren hans slik at hun ble paralysert. Mye informasjon rundt rettssakene og opptøyene som fulgte, noe jeg likte godt. Hadde nok likt memoaren bedre dersom jeg hadde satt meg inn i forfatterens liv og erfaringer dør jeg plukket opp boka
March 3, 2022
I read this book as part of a race network book club and I experienced so many emotions whilst reading it. Shock, horror, shame, anger and then finally hope. This all happened in my lifetime, in the country where I live, yet I wasn’t aware of it until I read the book.
The work Lee has done to raise awareness and change behaviours is amazing. I am genuinely humbled by his attitude and positivity.
The work Lee has done to raise awareness and change behaviours is amazing. I am genuinely humbled by his attitude and positivity.
May 15, 2021
Insightful, interesting and inspiring
Like others before me I could not put this book down. I'm usually a slow reader but I finished it in a day. A 'must read' for all Londoners and recommended for anyone interested in the relationships between the police and the black community. The historical and cultural references are insightful. Seeing another side to Lee's alter ego 'Brandy Lee ' was interesting. Lee's journey and life experiences have truly been inspiring. FIVE STARS all the way.
Like others before me I could not put this book down. I'm usually a slow reader but I finished it in a day. A 'must read' for all Londoners and recommended for anyone interested in the relationships between the police and the black community. The historical and cultural references are insightful. Seeing another side to Lee's alter ego 'Brandy Lee ' was interesting. Lee's journey and life experiences have truly been inspiring. FIVE STARS all the way.
October 27, 2020
"The more you refuse to hear my voice, the louder I will sing."
The Louder I Will Sing tells the story of Lee Lawrence and his family's fight for justice after his mother, Cherry Groce was wrongfully shot during a police raid on their Brixton home on 28th September 1985.
This memoir flits between "Before" and "After" the home invasion, which shattered Cherry Groce's spine, leaving her unable to walk again. It talks about their journey in search of justice and all of the hurdles that they had to overcome along the way.
One point Lawrence makes really stood out to me:
"How many other people have wasted chances because they didn't know the right person to explain that the chance exists?"
In my opinion, in terms of the criminal justice system and a lot of these wider processes (such as inquests, which is the context within which this statement was made), there is a real lack of public awareness and information about how to navigate the process. This information gap disproportionately affects working-class communities and is, in my opinion, one way in which these systems should be reformed in order to achieve real justice.
I really liked Lawrence's writing style: it was straightforward and accessible. His writer's voice is so distinct that I felt like I was listening to him speak his story aloud (though I was reading the e-book).
To close off the book, Lawrence shares some statistics and information about policing today: how it has changed and what still needs to change. I really appreciated this as I think it gives the reader (esp. those with less knowledge of the system) some insight into just how much needs to change and how institutionalised racism has become embedded in the British police force. I also really appreciated Lawrence's appraisal of community policing and how essential that practice is. He also talks about his own advocacy roles and how he is trying to enact change in British policing, which I really respected and admired.
The prologue, where Cherry Groce is dancing, had me close to tears right from the off. The same can be said for the epilogue, where she features again. The moments where Lawrence is talking about his new role as carer to his mother were also very moving. Though most of this book talks about policing and institutional racism, there are points at which poverty is discussed and Lawrence talks about his own experiences trying to make ends meet and trying to cope as a child dependent on his mother's benefits. Though written about the 1980s-1990s, so much of what Lawrence experienced then is still happening today and I think reading this in light of the UK Government's decision not to provide hungry kids with free school meals over the half term and Christmas holidays just made this all the more devastating.
The Louder I Will Sing is an excellent non-fiction book and one I would highly recommend to others. It is accessible, personal, well researched and extremely moving. Thank you for sharing your story, Lee Lawrence.
Content warnings: police brutality, racism, drugs, weaponry.
The Louder I Will Sing tells the story of Lee Lawrence and his family's fight for justice after his mother, Cherry Groce was wrongfully shot during a police raid on their Brixton home on 28th September 1985.
This memoir flits between "Before" and "After" the home invasion, which shattered Cherry Groce's spine, leaving her unable to walk again. It talks about their journey in search of justice and all of the hurdles that they had to overcome along the way.
One point Lawrence makes really stood out to me:
"How many other people have wasted chances because they didn't know the right person to explain that the chance exists?"
In my opinion, in terms of the criminal justice system and a lot of these wider processes (such as inquests, which is the context within which this statement was made), there is a real lack of public awareness and information about how to navigate the process. This information gap disproportionately affects working-class communities and is, in my opinion, one way in which these systems should be reformed in order to achieve real justice.
I really liked Lawrence's writing style: it was straightforward and accessible. His writer's voice is so distinct that I felt like I was listening to him speak his story aloud (though I was reading the e-book).
To close off the book, Lawrence shares some statistics and information about policing today: how it has changed and what still needs to change. I really appreciated this as I think it gives the reader (esp. those with less knowledge of the system) some insight into just how much needs to change and how institutionalised racism has become embedded in the British police force. I also really appreciated Lawrence's appraisal of community policing and how essential that practice is. He also talks about his own advocacy roles and how he is trying to enact change in British policing, which I really respected and admired.
The prologue, where Cherry Groce is dancing, had me close to tears right from the off. The same can be said for the epilogue, where she features again. The moments where Lawrence is talking about his new role as carer to his mother were also very moving. Though most of this book talks about policing and institutional racism, there are points at which poverty is discussed and Lawrence talks about his own experiences trying to make ends meet and trying to cope as a child dependent on his mother's benefits. Though written about the 1980s-1990s, so much of what Lawrence experienced then is still happening today and I think reading this in light of the UK Government's decision not to provide hungry kids with free school meals over the half term and Christmas holidays just made this all the more devastating.
The Louder I Will Sing is an excellent non-fiction book and one I would highly recommend to others. It is accessible, personal, well researched and extremely moving. Thank you for sharing your story, Lee Lawrence.
Content warnings: police brutality, racism, drugs, weaponry.
December 13, 2020
I always feel a tad awkward/uncomfortable reviewing books that are memoirs/autobiographical, like heres little old me come to share my opinion on what has been your life or at least the experiences that have played a huge part in it. I do try and review fairly though and feel its important to share others stories especially when they are as important as this one.
Firstly and I say it first just incase you don't make it to the end of this review but If I can influence anyone to read a book then it should be this one.
Lee Lawrence was an 11 year old boy when he saw a police officer shoot his mother. I'm gonna let that sink in.... 11 years old. The same age as my eldest child. I remember looking across at her whilst reading one day and thinking she is the same age as Lee when his Mother was shot. Shot by an authority that is meant to serve and protect. It broke me. The image of a child watching his mother hurt and not able to go to her. Its something most adults wouldn't be able to face let alone an 11 year old child.
Cherry Groce was asleep with her family when the police raided her house looking for Michael Groce who was allegedy involved in an incident and was thought to be residing at Normandy Road where Cherry and her children lived.
He didn't live there and wasn't present at the time of the raid.
Cherry Groce was shot and paralysed from the waist down. She was shot wrongfully. She had committed no criminal offence and was an innocent civilian.
Cherry Groce being shot sparked the Brixton uprising in 1985.
This is Lee Lawrence's story on his long road to get justice for his mother. A story of resilience and love, of knowing that people even in authority need to be held accountable for the wrongdoing and pain they cause.
The aftermath of caring for someone with such severe injuries and the impact it had on his life.
From being a young boy to effectively having to grow up so quickly and take care of his Mum.
This is absolutely without a doubt one of the most moving books I've ever read. Lee writes like an absolute dream and I can't imagine how much courage it must of taken to write this story. His words moved me to tears throughout and his love for his Mother couldn't of shone brighter.
Its hard hitting and really opened my eyes to the struggle for justice and accountability within the system and the absolute disgusting racism that happens within the Met.
I'm so thankful and honoured that I got to read Lee's story. It will stay with me forever and I will be recommending this book to everyone I know.
There's a line in the book that says "The More You Refuse to Hear My Voice, The Louder I Will Sing"
That beautiful line really sums up this amazing book perfectly. If you made it to the end of this review please buy this book and read it.
Firstly and I say it first just incase you don't make it to the end of this review but If I can influence anyone to read a book then it should be this one.
Lee Lawrence was an 11 year old boy when he saw a police officer shoot his mother. I'm gonna let that sink in.... 11 years old. The same age as my eldest child. I remember looking across at her whilst reading one day and thinking she is the same age as Lee when his Mother was shot. Shot by an authority that is meant to serve and protect. It broke me. The image of a child watching his mother hurt and not able to go to her. Its something most adults wouldn't be able to face let alone an 11 year old child.
Cherry Groce was asleep with her family when the police raided her house looking for Michael Groce who was allegedy involved in an incident and was thought to be residing at Normandy Road where Cherry and her children lived.
He didn't live there and wasn't present at the time of the raid.
Cherry Groce was shot and paralysed from the waist down. She was shot wrongfully. She had committed no criminal offence and was an innocent civilian.
Cherry Groce being shot sparked the Brixton uprising in 1985.
This is Lee Lawrence's story on his long road to get justice for his mother. A story of resilience and love, of knowing that people even in authority need to be held accountable for the wrongdoing and pain they cause.
The aftermath of caring for someone with such severe injuries and the impact it had on his life.
From being a young boy to effectively having to grow up so quickly and take care of his Mum.
This is absolutely without a doubt one of the most moving books I've ever read. Lee writes like an absolute dream and I can't imagine how much courage it must of taken to write this story. His words moved me to tears throughout and his love for his Mother couldn't of shone brighter.
Its hard hitting and really opened my eyes to the struggle for justice and accountability within the system and the absolute disgusting racism that happens within the Met.
I'm so thankful and honoured that I got to read Lee's story. It will stay with me forever and I will be recommending this book to everyone I know.
There's a line in the book that says "The More You Refuse to Hear My Voice, The Louder I Will Sing"
That beautiful line really sums up this amazing book perfectly. If you made it to the end of this review please buy this book and read it.
February 24, 2021
This is a heart-breaking and an incredibly moving story of Lee Lawrence's fight for justice for his mother and rest of his family - a fight that took 29 years. He was just 11 when armed police officers broke into his house in South London at 7am and shot his mother, paralysing her from the chest down. This had monumental impact on his life, on his family's life and on his community - leading to 1985 Brixton riots that left many people injured. It's a story about racism in the UK, about grave mistakes made by MET that went unaccounted for decades and about a little boy growing up amidst it all in Brixton.
When I finished the book, I went to Youtube to play the song by Labi Siffre 'Something Inside So Strong. ' The title of the book is based on one of the verses of the song:
'The more you refuse to hear my voice
The louder I will sing'.
This book was just like this song: beautiful, heart-breaking, and one that simply must be heard. The song does a spectacular job of communicating your feelings once you finish Lee's book.
The higher you build your barriers
The taller I become
The further you take my rights away
The faster I will run
You can deny me
You can decide to turn your face away
No matter, cos there's
Something inside so strong
I know that I can make it
Tho' you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone
Oh no, something inside so strong
Oh oh oh oh oh something inside so strong
The more you refuse to hear my voice
The louder I will sing
You hide behind walls of Jericho
Your lies will come tumbling
Deny my place in time
You squander wealth that's mine
My light will shine so brightly
It will blind you
Cos there's
Something inside so strong
I know that I can make it
Tho' you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone
Oh no, something inside so strong
Oh oh oh oh oh something inside so strong
Brothers and sisters
When they insist we're just not good enough
When we know better
Just look 'em in the eyes and say
We're gonna do it anyway 2x
When I finished the book, I went to Youtube to play the song by Labi Siffre 'Something Inside So Strong. ' The title of the book is based on one of the verses of the song:
'The more you refuse to hear my voice
The louder I will sing'.
This book was just like this song: beautiful, heart-breaking, and one that simply must be heard. The song does a spectacular job of communicating your feelings once you finish Lee's book.
The higher you build your barriers
The taller I become
The further you take my rights away
The faster I will run
You can deny me
You can decide to turn your face away
No matter, cos there's
Something inside so strong
I know that I can make it
Tho' you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone
Oh no, something inside so strong
Oh oh oh oh oh something inside so strong
The more you refuse to hear my voice
The louder I will sing
You hide behind walls of Jericho
Your lies will come tumbling
Deny my place in time
You squander wealth that's mine
My light will shine so brightly
It will blind you
Cos there's
Something inside so strong
I know that I can make it
Tho' you're doing me wrong, so wrong
You thought that my pride was gone
Oh no, something inside so strong
Oh oh oh oh oh something inside so strong
Brothers and sisters
When they insist we're just not good enough
When we know better
Just look 'em in the eyes and say
We're gonna do it anyway 2x
October 20, 2020
In 1985, Cherry Groce, mother of six, was shot by an armed policeman following a planned raid. The bullet fragments were shattered into her spine, and she was left paraplegic. Lee Lawrence, her son was 11 at the time, and he lost the vibrant Mum who was always dancing. He also lost his faith in the police, and became her carer, giving up his childhood to care for his beloved Mum.
In 2011, his Mum died. When a doctor requests a post mortem be carried out, this is the start of a long journey to some kind of justice for her death, as well as the battle of his life.
Divided into before and after, Lee talks about his experiences of growing up as a young, Black man in Brixton. The uprisings, the community support, the fear and racism he and so many others experienced at the hands of white people, including the police.
Fighting to get answers he manages to secure legal aid, and representation, and gains access to a report carried out after the shooting. This showed massive failures in communication and intelligence, and the Met eventually accepted they had made fundamental errors that led to an innocent woman being shot. Lee goes on to sit on advisory boards to provide guidance for police forces when dealing with race. He qualifies as a mediator and believes firmly in restorative justice.
This is an important book, detailing the reality of being Black, and just how much work there is still to be done, especially with the recent case of George Floyd in the U.S. It is exceptionally well written and whilst there is sadness, there is a lack of bitterness which is inspiring. Lee uses his experience to be a force for good, and that is the message that I took from this book. Bad experiences can either make us bitter, or better. A wonderful testament to his mother Cherry, and a man who goes on to live a successful and meaningful life despite real hardship and tragedy.
In 2011, his Mum died. When a doctor requests a post mortem be carried out, this is the start of a long journey to some kind of justice for her death, as well as the battle of his life.
Divided into before and after, Lee talks about his experiences of growing up as a young, Black man in Brixton. The uprisings, the community support, the fear and racism he and so many others experienced at the hands of white people, including the police.
Fighting to get answers he manages to secure legal aid, and representation, and gains access to a report carried out after the shooting. This showed massive failures in communication and intelligence, and the Met eventually accepted they had made fundamental errors that led to an innocent woman being shot. Lee goes on to sit on advisory boards to provide guidance for police forces when dealing with race. He qualifies as a mediator and believes firmly in restorative justice.
This is an important book, detailing the reality of being Black, and just how much work there is still to be done, especially with the recent case of George Floyd in the U.S. It is exceptionally well written and whilst there is sadness, there is a lack of bitterness which is inspiring. Lee uses his experience to be a force for good, and that is the message that I took from this book. Bad experiences can either make us bitter, or better. A wonderful testament to his mother Cherry, and a man who goes on to live a successful and meaningful life despite real hardship and tragedy.
October 29, 2020
On 28th September 1985, Cherry Groce was shot by an armed policeman in her own home. The bullet fragments pressing into her spine were unable to be removed and she was left paraplegic. Her son, Lee Lawrence, was 11 at the time and witnessed the incident.
It was only earlier this year that I had even heard about the Cherry Groce shooting and the resulting Brixton riots of 1985. In the UK, I think we have a tendency to willingly supress incidents of racism and injustice while condemning the same of other countries. Stories like Lee's need to be heard now more than ever.
In The Louder I Will Sing, we learn of Lee's experience growing up in Brixton as a young Black man, and of his life before and after he saw a policeman wrongly shoot his mother. We see his battle to have to police be held accountable for their actions that night and recognise the damage they wrought to the whole family.
I found Lee's story very powerful, at times shocking and inspiring. It is both well-written and informative. This is a heart-breaking story of a man's fight for justice told with an ultimately hopeful tone.
I’d highly recommend this book to anyone who is trying to educate themselves about race and particularly experiences of growing up Black in Britain. Lee Lawrence's story is definitely one that deserves to be heard.
*Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review. As always, all opinions are my own.
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Content warnings: police brutality, racism, death of a loved one, grief
It was only earlier this year that I had even heard about the Cherry Groce shooting and the resulting Brixton riots of 1985. In the UK, I think we have a tendency to willingly supress incidents of racism and injustice while condemning the same of other countries. Stories like Lee's need to be heard now more than ever.
In The Louder I Will Sing, we learn of Lee's experience growing up in Brixton as a young Black man, and of his life before and after he saw a policeman wrongly shoot his mother. We see his battle to have to police be held accountable for their actions that night and recognise the damage they wrought to the whole family.
I found Lee's story very powerful, at times shocking and inspiring. It is both well-written and informative. This is a heart-breaking story of a man's fight for justice told with an ultimately hopeful tone.
I’d highly recommend this book to anyone who is trying to educate themselves about race and particularly experiences of growing up Black in Britain. Lee Lawrence's story is definitely one that deserves to be heard.
"The more you refuse to hear my voice, the louder I will sing."
*Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review. As always, all opinions are my own.
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Content warnings: police brutality, racism, death of a loved one, grief
January 24, 2021
Cherry Groce loved music, she loved to cook and above all, she loved and cared for her children. Cherry Groce was also shot by police in 1985 in an unnecessary police raid which left her paralysed and ultimately led to her premature death.
In his powerfully moving and heart-breaking memoir, “The Louder I will Sing”, Lee Lawrence tells the story of his family and the lasting impact that this terrible incident had for them. He tells an important story, which shockingly few people are really aware about but that is a key part of British history and should be more broadly taught and learned from.
Lawrence shares a deeply intimate and personal account of his family’s life both before and after the shooting. He tells the story of a woman who would give anything to look after her family. A woman who in the end, gave her life to protect them.
For anyone who might think that racism, both on a personal level and on an institutional level, isn’t a UK issue, I seriously recommend that you read this book. It’s not an easy read, but it’s one that we all need to read, we need to take in and we need to learn from.
Lee Lawrence is an incredibly inspiring man, who from a situation so heart-breaking and traumatic, and in spite of so many barriers, managed to pursue justice for his mother whilst also fighting for a change in society in the hope that others might not have to go through the same.
In his powerfully moving and heart-breaking memoir, “The Louder I will Sing”, Lee Lawrence tells the story of his family and the lasting impact that this terrible incident had for them. He tells an important story, which shockingly few people are really aware about but that is a key part of British history and should be more broadly taught and learned from.
Lawrence shares a deeply intimate and personal account of his family’s life both before and after the shooting. He tells the story of a woman who would give anything to look after her family. A woman who in the end, gave her life to protect them.
For anyone who might think that racism, both on a personal level and on an institutional level, isn’t a UK issue, I seriously recommend that you read this book. It’s not an easy read, but it’s one that we all need to read, we need to take in and we need to learn from.
Lee Lawrence is an incredibly inspiring man, who from a situation so heart-breaking and traumatic, and in spite of so many barriers, managed to pursue justice for his mother whilst also fighting for a change in society in the hope that others might not have to go through the same.
January 9, 2021
Not my usual fare and I expected this to be a tough read and much more full of righteous anger and contemporary angst than it actually is.
I'm old enough to remember the Brixton riot of 1985 and the name of Cherry Groce is very familiar to me. But of course I've never known the full story of the police raid and shooting or of Cherry Groce's life subsequently until her death in 2011. Probably nobody has. This memoir by her son Lee Lawrence tells the whole story through from his own childhood until her death and the family's recent success in wringing an apology and damages from the police, 30 years on.
It's a beautifully written, inspiring read. And in many ways it's really the story of Lee Lawrence himself, whose own chosen path, as his mums carer has led him more recently to become a fighter for justice, better community relations and humanity. He is obviously a good sort. It's a book for the BLM era, and despite its ghastly subject matter, it ends on an optimistic note. Highly recommend.
I'm old enough to remember the Brixton riot of 1985 and the name of Cherry Groce is very familiar to me. But of course I've never known the full story of the police raid and shooting or of Cherry Groce's life subsequently until her death in 2011. Probably nobody has. This memoir by her son Lee Lawrence tells the whole story through from his own childhood until her death and the family's recent success in wringing an apology and damages from the police, 30 years on.
It's a beautifully written, inspiring read. And in many ways it's really the story of Lee Lawrence himself, whose own chosen path, as his mums carer has led him more recently to become a fighter for justice, better community relations and humanity. He is obviously a good sort. It's a book for the BLM era, and despite its ghastly subject matter, it ends on an optimistic note. Highly recommend.
March 5, 2021
I can't stop thinking about how Lee Lawrence was just 11 years old when police burst into his home in a catastrophically bungled and inept armed raid and gunned down his mother, leaving her paralysed for life, with her injuries ultimately causing her death decades later. The event sparked the Brixton Riots of 1985. The appalling violence could have easily broken him. But instead, his love for his mother - the music-loving dancer now confined to hospital beds and a wheelchair - saw him care for her for decades, not only in a practical sense but also by spearheading a clear-eyed and righteous campaign for justice, against all the odds. Lawrence bottled and channelled his anger to seek truth and recognition for the terrible mistakes, injustice and racism that cut so destructively through his family. The image of Lee on the cover of this book brings home just how young he was when his world was shattered. His mum's words as she lay bleeding on the floor of their home are familiar and chillingly relevant today: "I can't breathe. I can't breathe."
January 10, 2021
This is a brilliant memoir by the son of Cherry Groce of his childhood before and after his mum was shot by a Met police officer in 1985 and of his fight for justice after her death in 2011. It is compelling, deeply moving, inspiring and accessible. I read it cover to cover in one afternoon. It is at once an evocative and relatable story of life for kids and teens in the 80s and 90s and a profound study of structural racism in the British police and judicial system. Most of all it is a tribute to a wonderfully strong woman and to her amazing son who had to fight so hard within the system to get the recognition, apology and justice his family deserved. Highly recommended.
March 7, 2021
This an amazing story about Cherry Groce, the black woman who was shot by the police during a bungled raid in the 1980s. This event spearheaded the Brixton riots. The culmination of continued harassment by the black community by the police in the UK .
Lee powerfully narates her story and the aftermath of these events, the impact on her and her family. Also, the family's fight to get justice.
The title is taken from a Labi Sifre song. When you read this story you can hear Lee's voice. The catalogue of mistakes will stagger many and arouse anger. Lee's resilience holds strong and is a positive force. A must read!
Lee powerfully narates her story and the aftermath of these events, the impact on her and her family. Also, the family's fight to get justice.
The title is taken from a Labi Sifre song. When you read this story you can hear Lee's voice. The catalogue of mistakes will stagger many and arouse anger. Lee's resilience holds strong and is a positive force. A must read!
October 13, 2020
I bought this book, not knowing anything about the case. I can't believe I am 30 and did not know anything about this terrible incident its aftermath!!! I think this history should be taught in schools!!!
I found this book heartbreaking, and incredibly fascinating.
Hearing about how hard Lee and the Lawrence family had to work in order to get justice for their mother is shocking!!!
It angered me that this happened at all, and it angered me that I didn't know about the incident in the first place.
I am so pleased I have read this, and I will be recommending this book to everyone!!!
I found this book heartbreaking, and incredibly fascinating.
Hearing about how hard Lee and the Lawrence family had to work in order to get justice for their mother is shocking!!!
It angered me that this happened at all, and it angered me that I didn't know about the incident in the first place.
I am so pleased I have read this, and I will be recommending this book to everyone!!!
August 9, 2021
What this family have endured is unimaginable, a phenomenal memoir that can be given no less than 5 stars.
December 2, 2020
I can't believe I needed over a month to read this book. Normally, I am a very fast reader - but this book... This book is not an easy one to read and if I, as a white person says so, I can't even imagine how a Person of Colour must feel when reading this book.
When we speak of racism, we think of the United States of America. The truth is, racism is not just a problem of the United States, but still present everywhere in the world. This book is a very good example of this.
The book is divided in two parts - chapters which happened Before and chapters happening After. The event triggering the Before and After is the death of Lee's mother who had been shot by a police officer. In case anyone is wondering why this is such a big event - the author is black. So is his mother, who has been bound to a wheelchair after the shot. This is absolutely devastating to her, since she loved dancing.
The books tells the story of the Before - the events before the shooting, the shooting itself and how the family dealt with it afterwards - and the After - after the mother's death, Lee goes to court because the bullet hadn't been able to be removed properly, eventually causing the mother's death. I am going to use her name from now on, because she wasn't just Lee Lawrence's mother. Her name was Cherry Groce. Her name was Cherry Groce and she was slowly murdered by a police officer.
I couldn't read this book as fast as I usually do. I had to pause every other while because this book is intense. It's emotional. The thing that made me shiver the most was: "I can't breathe", words uttered by George Floyd earlier this year - but also words uttered years before by Cherry Groce when she was shot.
Racism is not just a problem of the United States. Racism is everywhere and unless we do something about, it's not going to go away. Remember the victims. Remember their families. Do what you can to make sure racism isn't carried on to the next generations.
I received a free ARC by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
When we speak of racism, we think of the United States of America. The truth is, racism is not just a problem of the United States, but still present everywhere in the world. This book is a very good example of this.
The book is divided in two parts - chapters which happened Before and chapters happening After. The event triggering the Before and After is the death of Lee's mother who had been shot by a police officer. In case anyone is wondering why this is such a big event - the author is black. So is his mother, who has been bound to a wheelchair after the shot. This is absolutely devastating to her, since she loved dancing.
The books tells the story of the Before - the events before the shooting, the shooting itself and how the family dealt with it afterwards - and the After - after the mother's death, Lee goes to court because the bullet hadn't been able to be removed properly, eventually causing the mother's death. I am going to use her name from now on, because she wasn't just Lee Lawrence's mother. Her name was Cherry Groce. Her name was Cherry Groce and she was slowly murdered by a police officer.
I couldn't read this book as fast as I usually do. I had to pause every other while because this book is intense. It's emotional. The thing that made me shiver the most was: "I can't breathe", words uttered by George Floyd earlier this year - but also words uttered years before by Cherry Groce when she was shot.
Racism is not just a problem of the United States. Racism is everywhere and unless we do something about, it's not going to go away. Remember the victims. Remember their families. Do what you can to make sure racism isn't carried on to the next generations.
I received a free ARC by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
November 10, 2025
Cherry Groce was shot when I was 15. I remember it well, just as much as Stephen Lawrence stabbing. I was born in East London, and these crimes disgusted me. As a white man, I was taught to respect everyone as the individual they are, whatever race or colour they are.
This read was powerful, and often, I had tears forming whilst reading this book. It's a story of fighting for justice against a prejudiced society and organisation. I feel ashamed to be white when others of my colour commit such despicable crimes.
Granted, Cherry was shot by a police officer who was doing his job, but there was a failure. She was unharmed and posed no threat to the officer. She was shot in cold blood because of his racial views.
This story is inspirational for all and shows the courage it took to continue to fight for justice, even when the system had thrown obstacles in the way.
Lee Lawrence, I'm proud of what ya have achieved and how ya never let the bureaucracy beat ya down! Ya story is powerful, and his just as much part of our English history as anything else. Ya mother will be proud of ya! Never change! Ya a very inspirational man!
This read was powerful, and often, I had tears forming whilst reading this book. It's a story of fighting for justice against a prejudiced society and organisation. I feel ashamed to be white when others of my colour commit such despicable crimes.
Granted, Cherry was shot by a police officer who was doing his job, but there was a failure. She was unharmed and posed no threat to the officer. She was shot in cold blood because of his racial views.
This story is inspirational for all and shows the courage it took to continue to fight for justice, even when the system had thrown obstacles in the way.
Lee Lawrence, I'm proud of what ya have achieved and how ya never let the bureaucracy beat ya down! Ya story is powerful, and his just as much part of our English history as anything else. Ya mother will be proud of ya! Never change! Ya a very inspirational man!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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