The Power of Negative Thinking

by Oliver Burkeman

To achieve any major life goal, conventional wisdom tells us we must think positively. Picture yourself delivering the perfect presentation and it shall be so; envisage the ideal job interview and it will go well; imagine yourself sprinting first across the finish line and you will romp home as champion. While these strategies sound compelling, they have been shown to backfire.

Oliver Burkeman explores why people are often more successful - as are organisations, armies and governments - when they focus on reasons they are likely to fail; asks where happiness comes from, and whether we look for it in the wrong places; explores a phenomenon that has come to be called 'fungineering' – attempts to boost happiness in the workplace; and confronts what many of us see as the most negative of all experiences: death.

Oliver Burkeman explores why so many of us spend our working lives feeling like impostors on the brink of being found out. Where do these feelings come from and are we alone? Oliver talks to individuals who've reached the top of their field whether in the arts, business or medicine about how they all feel like impostors from time to time. He'll also examine the latest research that suggests its more prevalent than ever. What's changed about how we live and work today that leaves so many of us with these feelings. And what can be done about them? Is just admitting to one another that we all feel same way enough?

Genres: Self Help, Psychology, Audiobook, Nonfiction, Philosophy

1 pages, Audible Audio

First published January 1, 1996

Reviews

[Baraa · Rating 4 out of 5]

قرأت الكتاب منذ سنتين والكتاب الآن ليس بحوزتي لكي أكتب ملخص دقيق.. لكن باستطاعتي أن أقول بشكل موجز أن الكتاب يعرض وجهة نظر جديدة في تفكير وتصرفات البشر السلبية، بحيث يجعل القارئ يرى التفكير السلبي بطريقة لم يعتد أن يراها فيها: سيفهمها بطريقة مختلفة، سيجعله قادر أن يفهم لما الإنسان عادة يلجأ لأن يتصرف بسلبية.. وعندما يتم الفهم يصل الإنسان إلى الحل..
بقراءتك للكتاب ستدرك ربما للمرة الأولى أن الصفات السلبية التي تحملها، أُوجدها جسمك من أجل أن يحميك: ابتكرها جسمك لأنك كنت بحاجة لها (عوملت بطريقة سيئة من شخص ما)..
الكتاب لا يقدم فقط صورة جديدة لفهم التفكير السلبي، بل يقدم طريقة الحل أيضاً للتخلص من التفكير السلبي..

[دينـا · Rating 5 out of 5]

يتحدث هذا الكتاب عن الافكار السلبية التي تسكن عقول الناس ولكن من ناحية ايجابية !!
فهو على خلاف ما اعتدنا لا يرفض هذه الافكار ، بل يعتبرها اسلوب ذكي يطوره الانسان في سبيل حماية نفسه من تكرار تجاربه السيئه ..
فمثلا ان تعرض احد ما لتجربة هجر في الطفولة من قبل ابويه ، فهو بلا شك سيتبع اسلوبا انطوائيا متحفظا في علااقاته كي يحمي من نفسه من تكرار التجربة ، هذا السلوك يدل على حبه لذاته وسعيه الحثيث لتجنيب نفسه الالم ، ولهذا لا يجب ان نقول للناس لا تفكروا بشكل سلبي ، قبل ان نعرف انهم بهذا الاسلوب يحمون هشاشتهم العاطفية ..ويخبئون لا امانهم الشخصي ،..
تفكيرك السلبي سببه شعور سابق لهذا التفكير ، والشعور سببه مواقف مررت بها ، لا بد من ان تمر بهذه الرحلة العكسية لتقوي امانك العاطفي وبهذا ستتجاوز حتما طريقة التفكير ..
لماذا خمسة نجوم ؟ لأنني شخصيا مررت بكل ما ذكره الكاتب هنا ، ونجحت في تجاوز سلبيتي بعد ان عمّقت ايماني الشخصي بذاتي والذي جاء من الحب اللامشروط الذي منحته لنفسي .. جاء الكتاب بالنسبة لي مثل ملخص تأكيدي على نجاحي في تجاوز مرحلة صعبه ، وعلى انني اصبحت اتعلم من نفسي قبل ان اتعلم من الكتب ..

[Ypatios Varelas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Εξαιρετικό βιβλίο σχετικά με το πώς οι αρνητικές σκέψεις και τα αρνητικά συναισθήματα στην ουσία δεν είναι αρνητικά αλλά προστατευτικά, ποια είναι τα βασικά προβλήματα που κρύβονται πίσω από αυτά και μας κάνουν να τα χρειαζόμαστε, πώς σκέψεις, συναισθήματα, συμπεριφορές και σωματικά συμπτώματα εξυπηρετούν τις ανάγκες ψυχικής προστασίας μας και ποια είναι η ενδεδειγμένη πορεία απαλλαγής (θεραπείας) από αυτά.
Αν και δεν συμφωνώ 100% με όλα όσα παραθέτει ο συγγραφέας, ωστόσο συμφωνώ απόλυτα με τη λογική και τον τρόπο αντιμετώπισης, κόντρα στην αμερικανοτραφή κουλτούρα της αναγκαστικής θετικής σκέψης αλλά και της λανθασμένης λογικής παρέμβασης πολλών ψυχοθεραπευτών.
Αφαιρώ ένα αστέρι από τα πέντε στη βαθμολογία γιατί ο συγγραφέας υπερτονίζει την αξία της θεραπευτικής σχέσης (είναι βασικός παράγοντας αλλά εξίσου σημαντικές είναι και οι τεχνικές σύμφωνα με τις γνώσεις και την πείρα μου). Επίσης, και αυτό είναι σημαντικό, διότι ενώ κατακρίνει ουσιαστικά τις αναπλαισιώσεις που κάνουν οι γνωσιακοί ψυχοθεραπευτές παραθέτει ο ίδιος μία μεγάλη συλλογή αναπλαισιώσεων με κύρια αυτήν για τους γονείς (που είναι η βασικήπηγή προβλημάτωνκαι ψυχικών τραυμάτων για τους περισσότερεους), ότι "έκαναν ό,τι καλύτερο μπορούσαν". Παρηγορητικό, ρυθμιστικό, αλλά όχι θεραπευτικό! Αν μία τέτοια σκέψη έρθει ως αποτέλεσμα βαθιάς και ουσιαστικής αποφόρτισης και αποτραυματισμού (που μπορεί να γίνει μόνο με ειδικές τεχνικές όπως π.χ. το EFT ή το EMDR και ΟΧΙ γνωσιακά, έστω και ψυχοδυναμικά), τότε είναι καλό, αλλίως είναι "κουκούλωμα".
Κατά τα άλλα το βιβλίο είναι πολύτιμο για όλους όσους έχουν πρόβλημα αρητικών σκέψεων, συναισθημάτων, συμπεριφορών, σωματοποιήσεων (ψυχοσωματικών ζητημάτων) αλλά και για όλους τους θεραπευτές που ασχολούνται με τέτοια θέματα.

[Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Being a proponent of the power of positive thinking, this book "The Power of Negative Thinking" caught my eye while browsing for a holiday read and has reminded me of Dr.Phil McGraw's saying that no matter how flat you make a pancake it's still got two sides.

This book has given me a totally different perspective to negative thinking and how we use creative and ingenious ways to protect ourselves from further hurt, humiliation and rejection. The interpersonal interactions and defence mechanisms evident in my ABE classroom become all the clearer as a result. It also reminds me that creating safety is the essential first step which lets us move beyond our protective walls and towards a greater level of personal fulfilment.

[Meg · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. A nice, but short little listen that was certainly more like a podcast than a book. A lot of excellent ideas that just weren’t properly flushed out. And perhaps one or two tangents that didn’t really stay on topic, which is okay, because they were still interesting. I still have plans to read his book The Antidote, and I’m sure it says a lot of similar things but with a lot more substance.

[Lena · Rating 3 out of 5]

This felt like listening to a podcast or putting on a YouTube video in the background, which is actually my favourite way of listening to things. Didn't get anything particularly new from this, but I'm excited to read more of Burkeman's work!

[🌶 peppersocks 🧦 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reflections and lessons learned/the content of this book made me feel…

…that whether we’re working 60 hour weeks or lying on the sofa feeling weak and confused by life, all of us will often catch ourselves in a question of uncomfortable reflection at some point

[Michael · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book and it inspired me to read further into stoicism. I definetly believe being a Stoic is a great way to live life.

[Mahmoud elhofy · Rating 3 out of 5]

كتاب جميل وبسيط جدا
الكتاب كله بيتكلم عن فكره واحده وهيا ان الواحد يفكر بطريقه ايجابيه افضل من التفكير السلبي..
وبيجيب امثله واسقاطات كتير علي حاجات ف حياتنا حاجات كتير منها مستني فعلا...

في حاجه اتعلمتها و هيا ان الواحد مفروض يكون مسامح في حياته مواقف واشخاص علشان يعرف يفكر بايجيابيه و يتخطي كل الامه

[Madii Wade · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn't get to finish this book as it belonged to somebody I was staying with, but as far as I read I would give it five stars! at first I was skeptical as it is such a different view on the typical self help books, but the more I read it the more I resonated with it. I think it really makes you consider the way we think. not recommended to people who are quick to judge a book!

[Stephen Theaker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oliver Burkeman always seems so wise and sensible on Twitter and in his Guardian columns, so I got this from Audible and it didn't disappoint. Worrying about whether you can do things better and fretting about what could go wrong can be very useful, properly channelled.

[Nadya Ichinomiya · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quite short, about 2 hours. seems like this was more like 4 or 5 podcasts linked together.

Not terrible, I just much preferred and found much more valuable his more thoughtful and comprehensive book, Four Thousand Weeks.

[Mia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is short and worth listening to. It touches on a number of Stoic concepts and goes into more depth on impostor syndrome (and includes an interview with Amanda Palmer!) than anything I've come across before.

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book changed my life when i was in the sixth grade.

this isn't actually what i read, but it has the same title.

[Siofra Ferriter · Rating 5 out of 5]

Before reading this I had no belief self help books could be useful and this completely changed that view. Really practical, readable and educational. Fantastic resource alongside therapy

[Yael Isakov · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a really fun audiobook.
I enjoyed the positive outlook on negative thinking.
It will definitely make me more forgiving of the over-thinkers in my life.
Additionally that piece on imposter syndrome is so relatable. The best providers I know are always trying learn from others.
Favorite quote: “At the birth of liberalism we’ve replaced G-d with other people and we’ve become a slave to public opinion. “

[AJ · Rating 3 out of 5]

A short audio program that uses interviews to explore the topics of Stoicism, imposter feelings (not syndrome!), and others that may not be new to listeners but are worth hearing again regardless.

[Bh · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not bad. Concise. Like a podcast less like a book. Talks about how sometimes when you think positively it can lead to less desirable outcomes as one becomes less motivated to do certain actions. Trying to avoid negative thinking is not good too like not thinking about death etc.

[Brian Gowthorpe · Rating 4 out of 5]

A thought provoking read, touching on “impostor syndrome” and the snake oil of positive thinking gurus. Negative thinking aids risk assessment and can head off problems. Amanda Palmer featured and was very entertaining.

[Angtburg · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nice to know plateaus and enough are enough

[Gareth · Rating 3 out of 5]

(audiobook)

[Rob Green · Rating 3 out of 5]

Short, makes a couple of good points, the conversational style was quite good at exploring positive and negative thinking, not particularly ground breaking but still quite good.

[Kirsti · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought-provoking multipart BBC audio series. Covers much of the same ground as his books. Burkeman interviews several experts, including a doctor and a rock star.

[KWat · Rating 5 out of 5]

Informative, entertaining, relatable.

[Dina ElMaamoun · Rating 3 out of 5]

Underwhelming. I expected more, and the content is recycled at best. But it was a fun quick listen while I did chores.

[GT]

I like the ideas in the book, but you can probably skip it if you have read many books from this author.

[DP · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short. Unique take.

[Radostina Tsvetkova · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Anyone who totally knows what they’re doing is not to be trusted.”

[Lenon · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very nice series of mini audio essays on productivity, happiness, and success, in the complete opposite manner to what mainstream motivational literature serves.

[Muhammad Moneib · Rating 4 out of 5]

A Safe Way towards Open

So many negative things are being said about negativity and negative people. It is all part of the "Don't Worry, Be Happy" scheme, or what can be called the "Hakuna Matata" line of thinking. These views miss one essential point, that is positivity doesn't work for many people, and that the whole concept of "keep smiling whatever happens" doesn't suit everybody.

Negative people have their roots spread well inside truth, and they do worry because they have to; it is for their own protection. While a silly motivational speaker might convince some lazy people to find a purpose, his tricks will never work for someone who doesn't feel the need for such purpose. Negativity is a far deeper issue than laziness; it conceals the very purpose of living by shifting the mindset entirely towards protection. Survival, in a way, becomes the sole purpose, however distorted this might be.

That's what Dr. Tony Humphreys tries to explain rightfully in this book: positive thinking is all about openness, while negative thinking is all about protection. In other words, you might look outwards to live, or inwards to survive. For him, there's nothing called "negative thinking" or "positive thinking," hence the quotations in the book's title. He explains repeatedly throughout the book that these patterns of thinking lie in the deep emotions that are usually repressed within oneself and are the result of one's upbringings.

Nevertheless, the book advocates coming to peace with the past and accepting one's negative protectors as the only way to advance towards a more balanced view of life. There is no point in blaming the parents, for instance, for the failed upbringings, but they must be held responsible in a peaceful manner. The same goes for the negative thoughts, as there is no point in denying them; they should be harnessed for more openness through recognizing their roles as protectors as well as signpost for must needed change. Through the process of accepting one's past, safety can be achieved gradually and along with it self-actualization.

The book derives several methods by which the psyche expresses its need for protection that begins through the physical body and ends with the unconscious mind, passing through the conscious, the pre-conscious and the subconscious, all being different, interactive levels of abstractions of the same self. The part about the physical self and the relation between illness and psychology is not entirely scientific, but seems plausible, at least in the general context of the matter. It is in the pre-conscious level, however, where the protective and open thoughts lie, deeply affected by the subconscious desire of belonging and well being, as well as the power of any other repressed emotion. A holistic approach towards tackling the issues of all these levels is needed to enhance the interactivity among them and consequently the opportunities for change.

Dr. Tony's ultimate message is to love oneself. He provides a somewhat vague road map towards that goal and his outlined solutions are far from concrete. He admits, though, that it's not easy to provide a general solution for such a complex issue as the psyche's abhorrence of openness or desire for over protection. He repeatedly affirms the uniqueness of every human being, and consequently the uniqueness of each trip towards self-actualization. The main guideline is to understand the past, harness its protectors through understanding them and the creation of a safe environment to loosen their grip while maintaining the much needed balance between openness and protection.

Therefore, the glass becomes both half empty and half full. One's perception depends on his need for protection from the outside world. Pessimism will lead to protection but will deny you many opportunities. Optimism may get you the opportunities but without protection, they might not be of much use. A healthy balance is needed, which can be summarized in a single word: anticipation. In this quality, one can both approach opportunities without letting go his shield, which is another example why protection should precede openness.

A little bit too idealistic, repetitive, and lacking clear emphasis on situations when pessimism is desirable, The Power of 'Negative' Thinking sounds like a usual self-help book, but unlike the other books of the same genre, it doesn't pretentiously provide any easy answers. It will dig cracks in one's character to expose to oneself the deficiencies of one's soul, and that's it. It will leave you with more questions about yourself, and will help you track your actions from your thoughts down into your inner emotions. Thus, it is more of a self-analysis exercise than a feel-good, self-help read. It feels almost like going for the first time to a clever shrink, because it is written by one. It is up to you, then, whether to continue your own therapeutic journey or not.