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A Faithful Farewell: Living Your Last Chapter with Love
When the time comes for us to die, how do we say good-bye to our friends, our families, and the lives we have lived? How do we remain faithful -- to God, to ourselves, and to loved ones -- as we face our final journey? As Marilyn McEntyre acknowledges, these questions are especially challenging because we now live longer than previous generations did, and many of us die more slowly. Those who are dying have a lot of things to deal with -- fear, discouragement, boredom, pain, regret. The list is long. In this book McEntyre offers fifty-two short meditations on the very real issues faced by dying people. She addresses a wide and sensitively chosen range of subjects, including such things as anger, losing control, curiosity, doubt, loss of privacy, family conflict, sadness, gratitude, and even spiritual adventure. McEntyre’s insightful reflections -- offering what she calls “a different kind of hope” -- speak to the heart of the physical, emotional, and spiritual dimensions of dying. Brief concluding prayers and lines from cherished hymns further lift up the reader as he or she seeks to faithfully navigate the great transition from this life to the next.
- GenresSpirituality
157 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 21, 2015
23 people are currently reading
65 people want to read
About the author
Marilyn Chandler McEntyre
24 books74 followersMarilyn Chandler McEntyre is a fellow of the Gaede Institute for the Liberal Arts at Westmont College, Santa Barbara, California, and she teaches at UC Berkeley. Her other books include Drawn to the Light: Poems on Rembrandt's Religious Paintings, In Quiet Light: Poems on Vermeer's Women, and Patient Poets: Illness from Inside Out.
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
December 31, 2015
How does one die a good death? With the increasing capacity of technology to extend life, growing numbers of people are dying in hospitals, often dying hooked up to machines. Hospice is a movement that helps to ease the pathway of death, and has proven very helpful to the dying and to their families. As a pastor I am called upon to walk with both the dying and their families. It is a blessed ministry, but is often a difficult one.
Marilyn Chandler McEntyre's book "A Faithful Farewell," is a beautifully written spiritually sensitive exploration of the journey toward death. Written in the first person at first you wonder whether she is describing her own journey toward death. As she writes about receiving dreaded news or pain or the good days, you gain an important perspective on life and death.
The book is comprised of fifty-four reflections, each running from two to three pages. Each topic lifted up is accompanied by a prayer. Topics include pain, privacy, regrets, doubt, memories, and more. In an introductory essay on "Dealing with Dying," McEntyre writes of the "slow leave-taking" that many go through. This journey involves "a variety of difficulties, uncertainties, adjustments, and surprises." There are physical, spiritual, and emotional issues to deal with. She tries to identify some of these challenges and surprises. Her reflections derive both from wrestling with her own aging process and from conversations she has had as a hospice volunteer. She writes in the first person, "hoping that will give them an immediacy they might not have otherwise, and make them more a sharing of a common condition than advice from across a chasm that divides health from illness" (p. xi).
McEntyre is currently professor of medical humanities at the University of California Berkeley and a former English professor at Westmont College.
This is an important faith-filled book. It likely will speak to a different people in different ways. A person who is in hospice might read it seeking wisdom as they move toward death. Family members might find in this book words of wisdom that will help them be present to their loved ones. I know that one of the greatest challenges facing families is how to talk about death, as well as simply being present. As McEntytre points out in different essays the dying may want someone present to hold their hand or even hold them close. Or they may wish to be left alone. Knowing how to respond to these differing needs can be challenging.
For those who are in pastoral ministry this is a must read book. It is a must read because we too struggle with knowing how to be present. When do we give encouragement and when do we simply listen? Even as families struggle with knowing how to be present, so do we. Thus, in a chapter entitled "Uncomfortable Comfort," she writes: "Some days people's efforts to comfort me make me feel loved, cared for, and less afraid. Other days they irritate me unreasonably: I don't want my pillow plumped or my hand held or news from the book club or even the flowers whose mild scent give s me a little waves of nausea. I don't always want visitors, but I don't want to hurt the feelings of those whose visits are well-intended, if ill-timed. And even the visitors I do want don't always manage to leave me feeling more peaceful or grateful or kindly. I don't want illness to make me irritable, but it does" (p. 65). Knowing when to be present and when not too is not always easy to discern, but it is an important skill that I'm still learning.
So, by all means -- take and read!
Marilyn Chandler McEntyre's book "A Faithful Farewell," is a beautifully written spiritually sensitive exploration of the journey toward death. Written in the first person at first you wonder whether she is describing her own journey toward death. As she writes about receiving dreaded news or pain or the good days, you gain an important perspective on life and death.
The book is comprised of fifty-four reflections, each running from two to three pages. Each topic lifted up is accompanied by a prayer. Topics include pain, privacy, regrets, doubt, memories, and more. In an introductory essay on "Dealing with Dying," McEntyre writes of the "slow leave-taking" that many go through. This journey involves "a variety of difficulties, uncertainties, adjustments, and surprises." There are physical, spiritual, and emotional issues to deal with. She tries to identify some of these challenges and surprises. Her reflections derive both from wrestling with her own aging process and from conversations she has had as a hospice volunteer. She writes in the first person, "hoping that will give them an immediacy they might not have otherwise, and make them more a sharing of a common condition than advice from across a chasm that divides health from illness" (p. xi).
McEntyre is currently professor of medical humanities at the University of California Berkeley and a former English professor at Westmont College.
This is an important faith-filled book. It likely will speak to a different people in different ways. A person who is in hospice might read it seeking wisdom as they move toward death. Family members might find in this book words of wisdom that will help them be present to their loved ones. I know that one of the greatest challenges facing families is how to talk about death, as well as simply being present. As McEntytre points out in different essays the dying may want someone present to hold their hand or even hold them close. Or they may wish to be left alone. Knowing how to respond to these differing needs can be challenging.
For those who are in pastoral ministry this is a must read book. It is a must read because we too struggle with knowing how to be present. When do we give encouragement and when do we simply listen? Even as families struggle with knowing how to be present, so do we. Thus, in a chapter entitled "Uncomfortable Comfort," she writes: "Some days people's efforts to comfort me make me feel loved, cared for, and less afraid. Other days they irritate me unreasonably: I don't want my pillow plumped or my hand held or news from the book club or even the flowers whose mild scent give s me a little waves of nausea. I don't always want visitors, but I don't want to hurt the feelings of those whose visits are well-intended, if ill-timed. And even the visitors I do want don't always manage to leave me feeling more peaceful or grateful or kindly. I don't want illness to make me irritable, but it does" (p. 65). Knowing when to be present and when not too is not always easy to discern, but it is an important skill that I'm still learning.
So, by all means -- take and read!
May 13, 2016
It is a powerful book written for those living in the last stages of a terminal illness or facing death. McEntyre writes out of her experience working and volunteering in hospice care. This short book might be helpful to read alongside your dying friend or family member. The chapters are 1-2 pages, written for those with depleted energy and potentially shorter attention spans. Each chapter closes with a prayer and the words of a hymn.
Her reflections are powerful and well-written.
Her reflections are powerful and well-written.
July 15, 2015
I found this book to be compelling and poignant, so true to my experience of walking with people through the valley of the shadow. Its language, its reflective spirit, its range of expression are all worthy for anyone in extremity, not just with a terminal diagnosis. I find her writing to be lucid and compelling, even as it touches my heart and spirit.
October 28, 2016
A fine selection of meditations and prayers for Christians who are dying, offering a keen understanding of the spiritual challenges and opportunities for growth and acceptance in the final phase of life.
June 15, 2015
Beautifully written. A book I'd want by my bedside if I were facing death.
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews