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If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk: Finding a Faith That Makes Us Better Humans
Thou Shalt Not Be Horrible.
Imagine for a moment what the world might look like if we as people of faith, morality, and conscience actually aspired to this mantra.
What if we were fully burdened to create a world that was more loving and equitable than when we arrived?
What if we invited one another to share in wide-open, fearless, spiritual communities truly marked by compassion and interdependence?
What if we daily challenged ourselves to live a faith that simply made us better humans?
John Pavlovitz explores how we can embody this kinder kind of spirituality where we humbly examine our belief system to understand how it might compel us to act in less-than-loving ways toward others.
This simple phrase, Thou Shalt Not Be Horrible, could help us practice what we preach by creating a world where:
• spiritual community provides a sense of belonging where all people are received as we are;
• the most important question we ask of a religious belief is not Is it true? but rather, is it helpful?
• it is morally impossible to pledge complete allegiance to both Jesus and America simultaneously;
• the way we treat others is the most tangible and meaningful expression of our belief system.
In If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk, John Pavlovitz examines the bedrock ideas of our religion: the existence of hell, the utility of prayer, the way we treat LGBTQ people, the value of anger, and other doctrines to help all of us take a good, honest look at how the beliefs we hold can shape our relationships with God and our fellow humans--and to make sure that love has the last, loudest word.
Imagine for a moment what the world might look like if we as people of faith, morality, and conscience actually aspired to this mantra.
What if we were fully burdened to create a world that was more loving and equitable than when we arrived?
What if we invited one another to share in wide-open, fearless, spiritual communities truly marked by compassion and interdependence?
What if we daily challenged ourselves to live a faith that simply made us better humans?
John Pavlovitz explores how we can embody this kinder kind of spirituality where we humbly examine our belief system to understand how it might compel us to act in less-than-loving ways toward others.
This simple phrase, Thou Shalt Not Be Horrible, could help us practice what we preach by creating a world where:
• spiritual community provides a sense of belonging where all people are received as we are;
• the most important question we ask of a religious belief is not Is it true? but rather, is it helpful?
• it is morally impossible to pledge complete allegiance to both Jesus and America simultaneously;
• the way we treat others is the most tangible and meaningful expression of our belief system.
In If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk, John Pavlovitz examines the bedrock ideas of our religion: the existence of hell, the utility of prayer, the way we treat LGBTQ people, the value of anger, and other doctrines to help all of us take a good, honest look at how the beliefs we hold can shape our relationships with God and our fellow humans--and to make sure that love has the last, loudest word.
238 pages, Paperback
First published September 28, 2021
585 people are currently reading
4507 people want to read
About the author
John Pavlovitz
14 books224 followersJohn Pavlovitz is an American Unitarian pastor and author, known for his social and political writings from a post modern Unitarian universalist perspective.
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July 13, 2021
"What if we were fully burdened to create a world that was more loving and equitable than when we arrived?"
The title alone.... Are we jerks? Do we judge others? Do we help those that are "walking wounded"?
Why are we less than a compassionate group of human beings? Starting this book, I was taken back to my upbringing as a christian, maybe I shouldn't read this. Do I allow myself to succumb to something I don't want to see is there? Quickly realizing, John Pavlovitz has risked his reputation to relinquish his understanding of the religious tradition. Sometimes humorously he points out What Would Jesus Do. Would he look at us and say "You had one job" and that was to love one another? Did you make comparisons with others and choose to love them by their socioeconomic level, political affiliation, religious background, and color?
Some of his views may have people looking the other way instead of judging one's self..."Can't claim 'All Lives Matter' while protecting only those who share your pigmentation." "Life inside the womb is precious, so is the life outside of America". A humorous side was an analogy of the bumper sticker "How is my driving?" Do we really want to know? Not our automobile abilities, but our life. "Maybe we should ask someone how our driving is...would we listen?"
I think we could all be better humans, more compassionate and lose our less-than-loving ways towards others that don't fit into the realm of our "coffee shops". If he sounds angry in the book, he is. He devoted a whole chapter to his personification of his anger.
..I needed to see my own self-delusion and failure to recognize some people may never receive love, if we never give it. This was a quick read, but one I will not forget. It is not preachy for some of you who are worried about that. It is a view of America and how we have quickly descended into something our nation may never recover from. This may not be for the faint of heart that WE have dropped the human ball on a generation of delusional parents on social media instead of heeding to the love and compassion to their offspring. Call it what you want Gen Z kids or "sharenting" are the stars of their parents’ social media. You have 18 years to get it right with that child and teach them to love. I may be an outlier on my opinion, but this book had me on an anomaly of my usual book reviews.
"Love is the greatest force in the Universe." Rev. Dr. ML King
Thank you NetGalley & Westminster John Knox Press for this ARC for my honest opinion.
The title alone.... Are we jerks? Do we judge others? Do we help those that are "walking wounded"?
Why are we less than a compassionate group of human beings? Starting this book, I was taken back to my upbringing as a christian, maybe I shouldn't read this. Do I allow myself to succumb to something I don't want to see is there? Quickly realizing, John Pavlovitz has risked his reputation to relinquish his understanding of the religious tradition. Sometimes humorously he points out What Would Jesus Do. Would he look at us and say "You had one job" and that was to love one another? Did you make comparisons with others and choose to love them by their socioeconomic level, political affiliation, religious background, and color?
Some of his views may have people looking the other way instead of judging one's self..."Can't claim 'All Lives Matter' while protecting only those who share your pigmentation." "Life inside the womb is precious, so is the life outside of America". A humorous side was an analogy of the bumper sticker "How is my driving?" Do we really want to know? Not our automobile abilities, but our life. "Maybe we should ask someone how our driving is...would we listen?"
I think we could all be better humans, more compassionate and lose our less-than-loving ways towards others that don't fit into the realm of our "coffee shops". If he sounds angry in the book, he is. He devoted a whole chapter to his personification of his anger.
..I needed to see my own self-delusion and failure to recognize some people may never receive love, if we never give it. This was a quick read, but one I will not forget. It is not preachy for some of you who are worried about that. It is a view of America and how we have quickly descended into something our nation may never recover from. This may not be for the faint of heart that WE have dropped the human ball on a generation of delusional parents on social media instead of heeding to the love and compassion to their offspring. Call it what you want Gen Z kids or "sharenting" are the stars of their parents’ social media. You have 18 years to get it right with that child and teach them to love. I may be an outlier on my opinion, but this book had me on an anomaly of my usual book reviews.
"Love is the greatest force in the Universe." Rev. Dr. ML King
Thank you NetGalley & Westminster John Knox Press for this ARC for my honest opinion.
June 17, 2021
This book was my first introduction to John Pavlovitz, and l am beyond impressed. By the time I read the second chapter I was already researching who he was and following him on social media. Not only did John's words resonate with my own beliefs, I was challenged with how I live it out as well.
In this day and age, being a progressive Christian should be something that is more widely known and accepted. Especially if we claim to grasp Jesus' two commandments "1) Love God and 2) Love others" (Mark 12:29-31 MSG). Yet, unfortunately, that is not what is being done, which this past year (2020) has made abundantly clear. Instead of a year of turmoil, racism, death, and isolation bringing out the compassion of those following Christ we were shown more hate, violence, and segregation. People are literally being thrown out on the streets, beaten, and killed just for being different. Although aren't we all supposed to be brothers and sisters? John's book not only makes one question how the world is today, but he compares it to how it was during the biblical times. The parallels he points out are uncanny.
I personally believe that all people no matter their race, sexual orientation, religion, gender, or any way a person identifies themselves should be shown respect, equality, and ultimately love. None the less, I also value others opinions and understand we may not agree. Does that mean you should not read this book? That's up to you, but let me ask you this... do you believe "God is love"? Then, read this book and "Don't be a Jerk".
In this day and age, being a progressive Christian should be something that is more widely known and accepted. Especially if we claim to grasp Jesus' two commandments "1) Love God and 2) Love others" (Mark 12:29-31 MSG). Yet, unfortunately, that is not what is being done, which this past year (2020) has made abundantly clear. Instead of a year of turmoil, racism, death, and isolation bringing out the compassion of those following Christ we were shown more hate, violence, and segregation. People are literally being thrown out on the streets, beaten, and killed just for being different. Although aren't we all supposed to be brothers and sisters? John's book not only makes one question how the world is today, but he compares it to how it was during the biblical times. The parallels he points out are uncanny.
I personally believe that all people no matter their race, sexual orientation, religion, gender, or any way a person identifies themselves should be shown respect, equality, and ultimately love. None the less, I also value others opinions and understand we may not agree. Does that mean you should not read this book? That's up to you, but let me ask you this... do you believe "God is love"? Then, read this book and "Don't be a Jerk".
June 15, 2021
If God is Love, Don't Be a Jerk is a book on faith unlike any I've read before; Reading this book was enjoyable, not painful as some I've attempted to read. It's like curling up with the only person you can trust to express your honest feelings and thoughts regarding God and your faith. Stripped bare the essence of this book is "Thou Shall Not Be Horrible" a phrase that I have thought to myself often when encountering certain types of Christians.
This book isn't stuffy or scary, nor does it make false promises. One thing that is made very clear from the very first page is this will NOT be quick and easy so if you're looking for something you can just change instantly move right along and keep searching for what does not exist. Ideally you'll read this book instead and realize that while it may not be easy or quick it is the most inspirational relevant and desperately needed call to transformation.
John Pavlovitz writes with soul and it shines though every section of this book. Pavlovitz is humble, honest, and knows the meaning of humility; He bares his uncomfortable and frightening experience of the evolution of his Faith and leaves no room for mistaking his message. With simple sounding prose that flows naturally you'll find yourself nodding "mmhmming" and turning the page after page with no sense of time passing because you needed this book even if you didn't know it.
Before I even finished the book I was recommending it to my family and every friend I was in touch with and they are all excited at the idea of what this book can do for them, for their relationship with God and with themselves and their community. I am confident that they won't be disappointed and neither will you.
Do not ignore the call of this book. Make the time to give it a try and let your soul soar as you're led to a place in your Faith that you've been longing for (likely for quite some time)
Thank you so much to Netgalley and to John Pavlovitz for letting me preview an advance e-copy in exchange for my review. I am a much better person for the opportunity and I am beyond thrilled to have this blessing to pass on to every individual I can.
This book isn't stuffy or scary, nor does it make false promises. One thing that is made very clear from the very first page is this will NOT be quick and easy so if you're looking for something you can just change instantly move right along and keep searching for what does not exist. Ideally you'll read this book instead and realize that while it may not be easy or quick it is the most inspirational relevant and desperately needed call to transformation.
John Pavlovitz writes with soul and it shines though every section of this book. Pavlovitz is humble, honest, and knows the meaning of humility; He bares his uncomfortable and frightening experience of the evolution of his Faith and leaves no room for mistaking his message. With simple sounding prose that flows naturally you'll find yourself nodding "mmhmming" and turning the page after page with no sense of time passing because you needed this book even if you didn't know it.
Before I even finished the book I was recommending it to my family and every friend I was in touch with and they are all excited at the idea of what this book can do for them, for their relationship with God and with themselves and their community. I am confident that they won't be disappointed and neither will you.
Do not ignore the call of this book. Make the time to give it a try and let your soul soar as you're led to a place in your Faith that you've been longing for (likely for quite some time)
Thank you so much to Netgalley and to John Pavlovitz for letting me preview an advance e-copy in exchange for my review. I am a much better person for the opportunity and I am beyond thrilled to have this blessing to pass on to every individual I can.
September 27, 2021
Pavlovitz was at one time a successful evangelical pastor. Then he pursued a spiritual journey that took him to a place where he now says he would no longer describe himself in such terms. His is a messy faith, he says. He questions the existence of hell. He questions the purpose of prayer. While there is much about which Pavlovitz and I do not agree, I realize this is a valuable book that should be read by Christians, whatever their tribal description. He's not one of “us” any longer but, my goodness, does he have some insightful comments.
Pavlovitz writes as an insider. He has studied and preached the Bible for decades. He realizes he, like all of us, is working with an incomplete knowledge and understanding of what Scripture says. But he does know Jesus gave us one assignment, one great command: to love God, our neighbor, and ourselves. And Pavlovitz doesn't like how contemporary Christians are handling that assignment. He recognizes a “loveless, Jesus-less Christianity” that exists today. (89/2553) He wonders what happened to compassion, the essential aspect of following Jesus. He identifies toxic faith and bad theology. He knows when a counterfeit Christ is being presented. He is concerned that we are no longer representing a God that non-Christians would want to seek.
Pavlovitz's faith is messy. His theology is fluid. Nonetheless, his spiritual journey has yielded one statement he can hold on to: “faith shouldn't make you a jerk.” (684/2553) Rather, we should be people rooted in love for humanity (all of it, not just the unborn). We must stop being a barrier to God. Pavlovitz has observed the behavior of Christians during these last years, during the time of crisis, and has seen the facade of loving Christianity ripped away. Rather than wearing a face mask as a deeply spiritual act embodying love for neighbor, for example, not wearing one became a loveless act and a political weapon.
This is a thought provoking book. It is especially of interest to people who have left organized Christianity, feeling the rug has been pulled out from beneath them. You are not alone in your messy faith, Pavlovitz assures. You will be helped to imagine what being a Christian is like when walking out the command to love. This book is not for Christians who think they have their faith settled, however, who are dependent upon that hour Sunday morning for their spirituality. You are not ready for the uncomfortable work of reexamining your image of God and the love He commands.
I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
Pavlovitz writes as an insider. He has studied and preached the Bible for decades. He realizes he, like all of us, is working with an incomplete knowledge and understanding of what Scripture says. But he does know Jesus gave us one assignment, one great command: to love God, our neighbor, and ourselves. And Pavlovitz doesn't like how contemporary Christians are handling that assignment. He recognizes a “loveless, Jesus-less Christianity” that exists today. (89/2553) He wonders what happened to compassion, the essential aspect of following Jesus. He identifies toxic faith and bad theology. He knows when a counterfeit Christ is being presented. He is concerned that we are no longer representing a God that non-Christians would want to seek.
Pavlovitz's faith is messy. His theology is fluid. Nonetheless, his spiritual journey has yielded one statement he can hold on to: “faith shouldn't make you a jerk.” (684/2553) Rather, we should be people rooted in love for humanity (all of it, not just the unborn). We must stop being a barrier to God. Pavlovitz has observed the behavior of Christians during these last years, during the time of crisis, and has seen the facade of loving Christianity ripped away. Rather than wearing a face mask as a deeply spiritual act embodying love for neighbor, for example, not wearing one became a loveless act and a political weapon.
This is a thought provoking book. It is especially of interest to people who have left organized Christianity, feeling the rug has been pulled out from beneath them. You are not alone in your messy faith, Pavlovitz assures. You will be helped to imagine what being a Christian is like when walking out the command to love. This book is not for Christians who think they have their faith settled, however, who are dependent upon that hour Sunday morning for their spirituality. You are not ready for the uncomfortable work of reexamining your image of God and the love He commands.
I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
July 13, 2021
I really tried with this book, but it frustrated me too much to actually read more than a page or two at a time.
The author claims to be a christian, but removes Jesus from the equation.
I have detailed notes for the portion of the book that I was able to get through, but won't waste my time finishing it.
Chap 1
Pg 13
"These days... God is different".
God does not change. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Perhaps he meant to say, these days people experience God differently?
"This is where the journey to a more loving religion begins". No religion is loving or not loving. It is the people who love (or don't). What people should be searching for is a more intimate relationship with God (by praying and reading His word). And they should be striving to pass on His love to those around them.
Pg 15
Tiffany should turn to.... wait for it...God! Religion is not God. Nothing (no religion, mantra, communing with nature) is a substitute for God. Certain things make you feel closer to Him, but do not replace or encompass Him.
"If we're going to find a bigger God..." Either you know the one true God (creator of the universe) or you don't.
Pg 16
I completely agree with point number 2.
Pg 18
"Our initial faith traditions are all valid and meaningful". Although they may all be meaningful, they most certainly are NOT all valid. How can a Christian pastor state that Muslim, Hindu and Buddhist traditions are valid?!
"Jesus wasn't asking people to register for a religion, but inviting them into a way of being". Exactly!
Pg 21-22
God is everywhere. You can feel His presence in all of those non-church ways mentioned. But by not going to church, you miss out on the community of people who believe in the same general worldview as you. And just because you "have a religious experience" or "feel God" in some place or act, does not mean that you have a relationship with Him or that you will go to heaven when you die. Only a relationship with Jesus does that.
The author claims to be a christian, but removes Jesus from the equation.
I have detailed notes for the portion of the book that I was able to get through, but won't waste my time finishing it.
Chap 1
Pg 13
"These days... God is different".
God does not change. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Perhaps he meant to say, these days people experience God differently?
"This is where the journey to a more loving religion begins". No religion is loving or not loving. It is the people who love (or don't). What people should be searching for is a more intimate relationship with God (by praying and reading His word). And they should be striving to pass on His love to those around them.
Pg 15
Tiffany should turn to.... wait for it...God! Religion is not God. Nothing (no religion, mantra, communing with nature) is a substitute for God. Certain things make you feel closer to Him, but do not replace or encompass Him.
"If we're going to find a bigger God..." Either you know the one true God (creator of the universe) or you don't.
Pg 16
I completely agree with point number 2.
Pg 18
"Our initial faith traditions are all valid and meaningful". Although they may all be meaningful, they most certainly are NOT all valid. How can a Christian pastor state that Muslim, Hindu and Buddhist traditions are valid?!
"Jesus wasn't asking people to register for a religion, but inviting them into a way of being". Exactly!
Pg 21-22
God is everywhere. You can feel His presence in all of those non-church ways mentioned. But by not going to church, you miss out on the community of people who believe in the same general worldview as you. And just because you "have a religious experience" or "feel God" in some place or act, does not mean that you have a relationship with Him or that you will go to heaven when you die. Only a relationship with Jesus does that.
March 7, 2023
My thanks to NetGalley and Westminster John Knox Press for an eARC copy of this book to read and review.
Ok, if you are going to write a book with the title of "If God is Love, Don't be a Jerk", then maybe, you know, the writer, shouldn't be a jerk?
I DNF'd at 16%, because of the unbelievable judgment and assumptions being made about a particular group of people, specifying the gender and race of those in the group in the ugly comments that were being made.
As far as I am aware, God made ALL of us in His image, not just the people who look, act and believe like you.
Up to this point, I also had issues with the author's "theology" (I use the term loosely, as there did not seem to be much from the Bible to substantiate any of his claims), where he seemed to imply or come right out and say that God is most likely not found in churches and that one should leave to find God wherever he may be (in nature, etc.). God is everywhere, even in churches filled with hypocritical people. It sounded like "lone wolf spirituality", where I can worship on my own, I don't need a church family, organized religions are corrupt, etc. INCREDIBLY dangerous.
Yes, there are many churches where the people in it are corrupt. My original church worshipped money and not God, so when I was looking for a new church family and I found a church that really DID worship God, I was shocked. I thought all churches were money worshippers, but no, it was just the one I was in for so long, resigned and imagining all churches were like that. They aren't. Not all church groups are like that.
I'm sorry if you were hurt by someone or a group of someone's who self-identified as Christian. Just because they claim to be Christians doesn't mean that they actually are. If I decided I was a chair one day, that wouldn't make it true. Same for those who call themselves Christians, but act in anyway but. "By their fruit you will recognize them." Matthew 7:16a
In my current church I feel supported and try to support the others with me. Someone once told me that a church isn't a resting place for saints, it's a hospital for sinners. We are none of us perfect, but as a Christian, I try to acknowledge and live that fact and not think I am better than anyone else. Some days I do better than others.
"For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them." Matthew 18:20 NIV We aren't supposed to worship in a vacuum. If I fall, I know I have people who will help me get back up and I will do the same for them.
A lone deer is a lot easier for a pack of wolves to attack and capture then one in a herd. Have you ever seen those videos where a baby/young animal is getting a drink from the watering hole and it gets attacked by a predator and the whole herd just goes absolutely OH HECK NO on the predator and the attacked animal gets away and the predator flees in complete confusion as to how the tables turned?
I want to be the animal with the herd at my back, not the one by itself. The devil wants us to be the "lone wolf", so he can attack us knowing we won't have a whole herd of others at our back to help us fight him off and get away.
This book, at least the 16% that I read of it, seems to be encouraging the reader to go ahead and wander away from the herd, that we can do fine on our own.
He also seemed to suggest that God changes as time goes on. No, not true. God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He doesn't change, but WE do and our interpretation of His word changes, and not always for the better. That's where the disconnect lies. Our God isn't too small, but our understanding of Him always will be.
Now, I'm not a Biblical scholar, take my points for what they are worth, but if this author is a scholar, I would expect to see the Bible being used to back up what he is saying. I did take a peek at the notes before I removed this book from my eReader and I was not impressed. One chapter had ONE Biblical reference, another only three. I wonder which one he used to back up the hatred he was spewing towards a specific race and gender at 16%? (Sorry, low blow, but that part of the book REALLY upset me, if you couldn't tell.)
Ok, this book clearly did not work for me and I am also clearly in the minority on that, as evidenced by all of the positive reviews that total roughly 4.44 stars on GoodReads at the time I am posting this.
Take what I say with a grain of salt. I'm not a Biblical scholar, though I have read my Bible multiple times in different translations, go to church, have discussions with those who are much better educated on the subject than I am, etc. So, I have opinions. Since religions is based on faith and not fact (though even that seems to be falling by the wayside nowadays), and no human can possibly know God and all that He knows and has planned for us, we are ALL of us bound to be wrong in some ways and right in others, but the fun part is that we really don't know which bit is the fact and which bit isn't, but God gave us His word, Jesus and the Good News and the Holy Spirit as our comforter/counselor so we won't be playing guessing games and can make good attempts to do the right thing.
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it, 'Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22: 36-40 NIV
If we do those two things, then we are doing it right. I don't believe that this book was doing it right. Take that for what it's worth.
1, the title was the best part of the book, star.
Ok, if you are going to write a book with the title of "If God is Love, Don't be a Jerk", then maybe, you know, the writer, shouldn't be a jerk?
I DNF'd at 16%, because of the unbelievable judgment and assumptions being made about a particular group of people, specifying the gender and race of those in the group in the ugly comments that were being made.
As far as I am aware, God made ALL of us in His image, not just the people who look, act and believe like you.
Up to this point, I also had issues with the author's "theology" (I use the term loosely, as there did not seem to be much from the Bible to substantiate any of his claims), where he seemed to imply or come right out and say that God is most likely not found in churches and that one should leave to find God wherever he may be (in nature, etc.). God is everywhere, even in churches filled with hypocritical people. It sounded like "lone wolf spirituality", where I can worship on my own, I don't need a church family, organized religions are corrupt, etc. INCREDIBLY dangerous.
Yes, there are many churches where the people in it are corrupt. My original church worshipped money and not God, so when I was looking for a new church family and I found a church that really DID worship God, I was shocked. I thought all churches were money worshippers, but no, it was just the one I was in for so long, resigned and imagining all churches were like that. They aren't. Not all church groups are like that.
I'm sorry if you were hurt by someone or a group of someone's who self-identified as Christian. Just because they claim to be Christians doesn't mean that they actually are. If I decided I was a chair one day, that wouldn't make it true. Same for those who call themselves Christians, but act in anyway but. "By their fruit you will recognize them." Matthew 7:16a
In my current church I feel supported and try to support the others with me. Someone once told me that a church isn't a resting place for saints, it's a hospital for sinners. We are none of us perfect, but as a Christian, I try to acknowledge and live that fact and not think I am better than anyone else. Some days I do better than others.
"For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them." Matthew 18:20 NIV We aren't supposed to worship in a vacuum. If I fall, I know I have people who will help me get back up and I will do the same for them.
A lone deer is a lot easier for a pack of wolves to attack and capture then one in a herd. Have you ever seen those videos where a baby/young animal is getting a drink from the watering hole and it gets attacked by a predator and the whole herd just goes absolutely OH HECK NO on the predator and the attacked animal gets away and the predator flees in complete confusion as to how the tables turned?
I want to be the animal with the herd at my back, not the one by itself. The devil wants us to be the "lone wolf", so he can attack us knowing we won't have a whole herd of others at our back to help us fight him off and get away.
This book, at least the 16% that I read of it, seems to be encouraging the reader to go ahead and wander away from the herd, that we can do fine on our own.
He also seemed to suggest that God changes as time goes on. No, not true. God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He doesn't change, but WE do and our interpretation of His word changes, and not always for the better. That's where the disconnect lies. Our God isn't too small, but our understanding of Him always will be.
Now, I'm not a Biblical scholar, take my points for what they are worth, but if this author is a scholar, I would expect to see the Bible being used to back up what he is saying. I did take a peek at the notes before I removed this book from my eReader and I was not impressed. One chapter had ONE Biblical reference, another only three. I wonder which one he used to back up the hatred he was spewing towards a specific race and gender at 16%? (Sorry, low blow, but that part of the book REALLY upset me, if you couldn't tell.)
Ok, this book clearly did not work for me and I am also clearly in the minority on that, as evidenced by all of the positive reviews that total roughly 4.44 stars on GoodReads at the time I am posting this.
Take what I say with a grain of salt. I'm not a Biblical scholar, though I have read my Bible multiple times in different translations, go to church, have discussions with those who are much better educated on the subject than I am, etc. So, I have opinions. Since religions is based on faith and not fact (though even that seems to be falling by the wayside nowadays), and no human can possibly know God and all that He knows and has planned for us, we are ALL of us bound to be wrong in some ways and right in others, but the fun part is that we really don't know which bit is the fact and which bit isn't, but God gave us His word, Jesus and the Good News and the Holy Spirit as our comforter/counselor so we won't be playing guessing games and can make good attempts to do the right thing.
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it, 'Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22: 36-40 NIV
If we do those two things, then we are doing it right. I don't believe that this book was doing it right. Take that for what it's worth.
1, the title was the best part of the book, star.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 7, 2021
I first heard of John Pavlovitz sometime in 2016 when someone recommended him to me as “another pastor speaking out against the evangelical obsession with Trump.” I clicked the like button Facebook and followed him for a bit. And basically, if you’ve followed him on social media, then you’ve got a pretty good idea of the tone, structure, and content of If God is Love, Don’t Be a Jerk.
I have two primary criticisms of the book. First, it’s not really substantive. That’s not to say that Pavlovitz doesn’t engage with deep issues. He does. All the hot-button issues of sexuality, gender identity, abortion, politics, eternal judgment, and more get Pavlovitz’s signature treatment. But it’s all done at a superficial level. The exact same thing he does on Facebook, he does here. You can excuse it on social media for being social media, but the context of publication in book format deserves more depth and nuance.
Pavlovitz is ostensibly writing to his “opposition” on the Christian right, telling them hey, If God is Love, Don’t Be a Jerk. But there’s nowhere in this book where Pavlovitz tries to understand evangelicals. There’s nowhere that he even tries exegeting Scripture or providing solid argumentation for interpretational differences. He just states it blunt “Nope. You’re wrong about the Bible and silly for holding that interpretation.” To be quite honest, Pavlovitz sometimes comes across like a jerk.
Second, he uses language and terminology meant to evoke feeling rather than precision. When I read this book, I shared a quote from it in a fairly progressive pastor’s group that I’m involved with without any of my thoughts so as not to influence first thoughts and it received a fair amount of pushback. Here’s the quote: “God is decidedly nonbinary and that is really good news, because it means that we can discover the character of that God in every human being we encounter without exception.” On the surface, that might resonate with some believers. But there’s a difference between being nonbinary and transcending gender. God isn’t part of the binary because he’s the image of the full spectrum of humanity. It’s an emotionally evocative sentence, but in the end it exploits nonbinary people for the purpose of making an edgy and ultimately not very meaningful statement.
A third more minor point that I might bring up is that Pavlovitz presents himself as an insider critiquing Christianity, particularly evangelicalism. However, it’s important to note that Pavlovitz has stepped outside orthodox belief and currently practices Unitarian Universalism. UU is a unity faith that incorporates elements of most major religions and sees them all as being equally valid. Thus, Pavlovitz has moved outside of the orthodox bounds of faith and his criticisms then, are as an outsider rather than an insider.
In the end, if you’re a fan of Pavlovitz’s writings on social media, this is more of the same repackaged and edited into book form. If you’re looking for something a bit more nuanced or substantial, you’ll find yourself unfortunately disappointed.
I have two primary criticisms of the book. First, it’s not really substantive. That’s not to say that Pavlovitz doesn’t engage with deep issues. He does. All the hot-button issues of sexuality, gender identity, abortion, politics, eternal judgment, and more get Pavlovitz’s signature treatment. But it’s all done at a superficial level. The exact same thing he does on Facebook, he does here. You can excuse it on social media for being social media, but the context of publication in book format deserves more depth and nuance.
Pavlovitz is ostensibly writing to his “opposition” on the Christian right, telling them hey, If God is Love, Don’t Be a Jerk. But there’s nowhere in this book where Pavlovitz tries to understand evangelicals. There’s nowhere that he even tries exegeting Scripture or providing solid argumentation for interpretational differences. He just states it blunt “Nope. You’re wrong about the Bible and silly for holding that interpretation.” To be quite honest, Pavlovitz sometimes comes across like a jerk.
Second, he uses language and terminology meant to evoke feeling rather than precision. When I read this book, I shared a quote from it in a fairly progressive pastor’s group that I’m involved with without any of my thoughts so as not to influence first thoughts and it received a fair amount of pushback. Here’s the quote: “God is decidedly nonbinary and that is really good news, because it means that we can discover the character of that God in every human being we encounter without exception.” On the surface, that might resonate with some believers. But there’s a difference between being nonbinary and transcending gender. God isn’t part of the binary because he’s the image of the full spectrum of humanity. It’s an emotionally evocative sentence, but in the end it exploits nonbinary people for the purpose of making an edgy and ultimately not very meaningful statement.
A third more minor point that I might bring up is that Pavlovitz presents himself as an insider critiquing Christianity, particularly evangelicalism. However, it’s important to note that Pavlovitz has stepped outside orthodox belief and currently practices Unitarian Universalism. UU is a unity faith that incorporates elements of most major religions and sees them all as being equally valid. Thus, Pavlovitz has moved outside of the orthodox bounds of faith and his criticisms then, are as an outsider rather than an insider.
In the end, if you’re a fan of Pavlovitz’s writings on social media, this is more of the same repackaged and edited into book form. If you’re looking for something a bit more nuanced or substantial, you’ll find yourself unfortunately disappointed.
May 14, 2021
WOW. I have already gone on recommending this book to multiple people I know. "If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk" is a book on religion that is relevant to the times. Pavlovitz presents honest and relatable evidence supporting a loving, just God rather than the increasingly popular image of a God with Republican political beliefs that do not budge. The sum of it all can be found on pg. 57 in the quote, "[T]he sole universal truth I can hold onto -- is that faith shouldn't make you a jerk."
The vast majority of this book had me saying, "Duh," to myself over and over because it just makes sense. Pavlovitz includes occasional questions throughout that act as a sort of status check for morality, helping to internalize the content as you're reading it. As someone with a heavily Catholic upbringing, this book put words to many thoughts I have been unable to verbalize, whether out of indecision, doubt, or guilt. I believe that anyone and everyone who believes in God should read this book, whether because you're questioning things yourself or because you want to broaden your perspective.
The vast majority of this book had me saying, "Duh," to myself over and over because it just makes sense. Pavlovitz includes occasional questions throughout that act as a sort of status check for morality, helping to internalize the content as you're reading it. As someone with a heavily Catholic upbringing, this book put words to many thoughts I have been unable to verbalize, whether out of indecision, doubt, or guilt. I believe that anyone and everyone who believes in God should read this book, whether because you're questioning things yourself or because you want to broaden your perspective.
January 19, 2022
Growing up in the United States of America, you can't help but be exposed to Christianity as a religion and American Christianity as a powerful cultural force. Were you to grow up in another country, other religious traditions would dominate, but we Americans need to figure out our brand of Christianity and how it shapes us. I grew up in the Catholic faith, going through all of the usual rituals- First Communion, Confirmation, Catholic schools, guilt, shame, and being asked for money. For me, it was my introduction into religion, but I quickly outgrew its structured, limited vision of God and humanity.
Once I was an adult, I drifted away from the Catholic Church, even though I was taught that not attending weekly masses was the same as sinning, punishable by all sorts of nasty consequences including hell. And I wasn't alone- church membership has declined in the US from over 70% in 1980 to just 47% in 2020. The Catholic Church has been especially hit hard, with parishes, churches and schools closing all over the country, in part because of scandals involving priests and sexual abuse. The bottom line is that there are now more atheists, agnostics, and unaffiliated people than believers in the US, and churches haven't figured out how to be more relevant in a time of Black Lives Matter, Climate Change, and Covid-19.
Into this void comes writers and pastors like John Pavlovitz, who are trying to make religion and spirituality more fitting for the times that we live in. Pavlovitz, a Unitarian minister and prolific writer, has written his new book, If God is Love, Don't be a Jerk, as a passionate broadside to the narrowness and hypocrisy of American Christianity and a plea for more kindness, humility, and understanding. Pavlovitz is also an activist and blogger (Johnpavlovitz.com) who mixes politics with his religious teachings, because political beliefs are ultimately about values, and your values ultimately come from your religious faith and assumptions about God, humanity, and life. His politics decidedly lean to the left of the political spectrum, but in an era where Christianity has empowered the political right, that makes sense.
This book is a serious look at Christianity today, and it pulls no punches in its accusations of American churches that tolerate or even encourage being a jerk towards your fellow humans, especially if they are different than you. The author claims that humanity has evolved to such a point today that most of the older Christian church teachings and practices no longer fit. The reason that people are leaving churches is that they are feeling a sort of "spiritual claustrophobia", where the same old prayers, bible verses, and sacraments just don't work anymore.
When you think about it, it's a wonder that we've assumed that organized religion could ever capture the mystery and incomprehensibility of God. Our concepts of God are flawed, as are our religious texts, priests, and church buildings. Imperfect as they are, they're better than nothing at all. Now, perhaps is a time to build on the past and emerge onto a higher spiritual plane. And the first commandment of any good religion, as this book presents, is "Thou shalt not be a jerk." The book defines being a jerk as any intentional harm directed at a fellow human for any reason. (That would include any unintentional harm that you are willfully ignorant about.) Any religion that promotes or excuses war, racism, slavery, exploitation, violence, sexism, or out and out meanness has no reason to exist, and any God other than a loving, infinite God is not worth worshipping.
Pavlovitz chastises his fellow Christians for their hypocrisy in claiming to follow Jesus Christ but then not acting according to Christ's teachings in their everyday lives. Put some money in the collection plate and you've got a pass to be nasty until next Sunday. Churches teach that it's okay to be a sinner as long as you have a pipeline of forgiveness, which they gladly provide. Much of modern Christianity is based on fear and anger, and puts at its center a God that randomly judges and condemns large segments of humanity to storms, floods, plagues, persecution and the eternal fires of Hell. Maybe God is a jerk?
God is not a masculine, bearded father figure, because that makes women something lower and separate. God is transgender, because as an immortal spiritual force God has no need for genitalia. God is also not American, though many American Christian churches act as though God favored the USA. God is much bigger than America, and the idea that a spiritual deity would bless one country over the rest of the world is self-serving at best. How we see God is a reflection of how we see ourselves, and we all need to get out of our heads and admit that we really have no idea what God is like. We can only know God by how we act here on earth every single day. As the closing, beautiful lines of Les Miserables state "To love another person is to see the face of God."
Your faith should never make you a jerk. It shouldn't make you feel superior to others and give you license to judge and punish them. That goes for people of different races, sexual identities, occupations, baseball teams or religious traditions. Faith should bring people together, not reinforce tribalism. There are two ways to look at religious faith- either as a guide for proper behavior through the golden rule - or as a belief system to justify jerky behavior because being loving to absolutely everybody is just too hard.
Pavlovitz has studied the bible extensively, and he admits that there are conflicting passages that can be interpreted multiple ways. When you have a scripture that includes 66 books written over thousands of years by many authors that's been translated multiple times, you have to expect some amount of confusion and inconsistency. The Old Testament has admonitions to violently kill all sorts of sinners for minor crimes, is full of logical inconsistencies, and has been cherry-picked by all types of Christians and Jews to justify their existing beliefs and behaviors. The New Testament tells the story of Jesus of Nazareth as described by others, but those that cling the tightest and loudest to the name and image of Jesus use it to act like jerks, not loving followers.
The book examines the power of prayer and how it can be used or abused. At its best, prayer is a solemn statement of solidarity and caring that lets people know their community cares about them. But at its worst, prayer is an insincere pipeline to a fickle God who sometimes answers, sometimes doesn't, and apparently plays favorites. How else can you reckon when prayers to save a life go unanswered and a loved one dies, while an professional athlete credits his prayers as the reason his team won and the other one didn't?
The book proposes a new church, The Church of Not Being Horrible. At this church the prime directive of not being a jerk would be the guiding principle, and the emphasis would be on how we treat people, (and animals, and the planet). There would be no easy, comfy answers or assumptions, and everyone from the clergy on down would have to contend with a messy, uncomfortable, and continually unfolding, loving God. If a church isn't making its members be better people, it has no right to exist and it certainly has no right dragging God's name through the mud while doing it. This church would celebrate the goodness of people and be a loving, non-judgmental, spiritual community that honors God and the people in it.
This book fills me with hope that there are a lot of other ex-Christians like me out there. We are yearning for lives of love and meaning, looking for a spiritual center that makes sense to us. The God of hell, damnation, tribalism, judgment, and anger doesn't work for us anymore. We are all of us- Christians, Muslims, Jews, Atheists, Hindus and more- wandering around this planet with imperfect, incomplete knowledge of one of the greatest mysteries of all time- does God exist, and if so, what would it mean? The more we can get past our labels and assumptions and dig deeper into the meaning of that question, the better and more loving we can become.
This book is not for everyone, and is sure to offend those for whom the conservative, Republican, American Father-God still works. But for the rest of us, it gives us spiritual food for thought as we seek out a bigger and more expansive version of God.
(For fellow ex-Catholics out there, there are many alternative churches springing up with this type of theology. I'd like to thank the United Church of Christ for giving me a place to go to practice my eclectic faith and for promoting Pastor Pavlovitz extensively.)
August 29, 2021
Of course, the title of John Pavlovitz’s book tells you the story: If God Is Love, Don’t Be a Jerk: Finding a Faith That Makes Us a Better Human. You might be tempted to believe that you’ve gotten the gist and skip this book. Don’t. It’s the perfect guide for our times.
The truth is that there is so much toxic faith out there — what was once called “a bad witness” — that, increasingly, young people are turning their backs on religion altogether. White Evangelical leaders are reassuring themselves that, as has been historically true, their own children, after falling away in their early 20s, will return once they marry and have kids. But that is no longer happening for any Protestant denomination, Evangelicals included. Only 45% of Millennial parents (ages 24 to 39) say they take their kids to church. In addition, only 23% of young Millennials say they turn to religion to guide them on right and wrong.
But what if the religious weren’t trying to shame and blame, to “shrink the table” (the subject of Pavlovitz’s classic A Bigger Table: Building Messy, Authentic, and Hopeful Spiritual Community)? What if we sided with the oppressed? With the poor? With the ill? You know, like Jesus did? How would that change the Church? And the world? Pavlovitz doesn’t pretend to have all of the answers, but he has enough answers to make me so glad that I read this sequel to A Bigger Table. Highly recommended.
In the interest of full disclosure, I received this book from NetGalley and Westminster John Knox Press in exchange for an honest review.
The truth is that there is so much toxic faith out there — what was once called “a bad witness” — that, increasingly, young people are turning their backs on religion altogether. White Evangelical leaders are reassuring themselves that, as has been historically true, their own children, after falling away in their early 20s, will return once they marry and have kids. But that is no longer happening for any Protestant denomination, Evangelicals included. Only 45% of Millennial parents (ages 24 to 39) say they take their kids to church. In addition, only 23% of young Millennials say they turn to religion to guide them on right and wrong.
But what if the religious weren’t trying to shame and blame, to “shrink the table” (the subject of Pavlovitz’s classic A Bigger Table: Building Messy, Authentic, and Hopeful Spiritual Community)? What if we sided with the oppressed? With the poor? With the ill? You know, like Jesus did? How would that change the Church? And the world? Pavlovitz doesn’t pretend to have all of the answers, but he has enough answers to make me so glad that I read this sequel to A Bigger Table. Highly recommended.
In the interest of full disclosure, I received this book from NetGalley and Westminster John Knox Press in exchange for an honest review.
January 6, 2022
I struggled in reading this book, I went into this book blind. Not knowing about John Pavlovitz background in christianity or otherwise. As a newer believer I do not agree with this book and it's standing that all Christianity should die. As a whole I do feel the concept of not being a jerk to others does need to exist. God Is LOVE and we need to show Love to others. Although, within the writing of this book I felt John to be a jerk judging others and indeed putting his own personal beliefs as a force on others. I do not believe all Christians should read this book. It is important with any text published in reference to The Holy Bible. It is important to compare that and pray with God in respect to said text to better understand the alignment. However, to say that there is no hell and we should't be praying is not something I can stand behind. Thanks to Netgalley for an ARC ebook copy of this book. This review is my individual opinion and my honest review.
January 16, 2022
You'd think because the book bears the title " If God Is Love Don't Be A Jerk"the author would write in such a way that would help make his point. Yet sadly, this is a pompous work in which the author looks down his proverbial nose at those he is trying to reach.
He does make some good points. Generally, the point is, "Do unto others what you would have them do unto you." but his "holier than thou" attitude, the condescending way in which he writes damages his work.
Further, he seems to want a god that is ever changing to fit morals of an ever changing culture i.e., a wishy washy god that doesn't know what it wants. Is such a god really God or is it just another idol contrived by culture?
He does make some good points. Generally, the point is, "Do unto others what you would have them do unto you." but his "holier than thou" attitude, the condescending way in which he writes damages his work.
Further, he seems to want a god that is ever changing to fit morals of an ever changing culture i.e., a wishy washy god that doesn't know what it wants. Is such a god really God or is it just another idol contrived by culture?
April 11, 2024
Can we please - PLEASE - make this required reading for all who claim the word "Christian" in America? Because John lays out very well how American Christianity has gone off the rails, and how seeking God and seeking to be Jesus-like does not line up with much of American Christianity.
This is a book I'm going to come back to and read again (beyond the 2 times I've already read it) because there's so much to think about.
This is a book I'm going to come back to and read again (beyond the 2 times I've already read it) because there's so much to think about.
November 5, 2021
I don't even remember how I found John Pavlovitz' blog, but I've been reading it for what feels like ages. When I found his writing, I (like many others) found a pastor that I didn't even know I needed. What I did know is that his "God Box" (as he calls it) felt a lot like mine ... and that he was clearly walking Jesus' talk.
In my experience, pastors like that are few and far between. In fact, I can think of only four right off-hand -- and John Pavlovitz is one of them.
I've read a couple of Pavlovitz' other books, and while they all stand alone, they also build on one another. The essays contained in this book talk about the importance of kindness and compassion -- something to which I always aspire but sometimes find difficult to accomplish. There is practical advice, encouragement, and sometimes some just good storytelling in which Pavlovitz shows that he doesn't always get it right himself.
I can't find enough good words to say about this book, to be honest. I also find it difficult to put into words of my own just what was all about. Much of it was about feelings.
Be encouraged, as John Pavlovitz says. And read this book.
In my experience, pastors like that are few and far between. In fact, I can think of only four right off-hand -- and John Pavlovitz is one of them.
I've read a couple of Pavlovitz' other books, and while they all stand alone, they also build on one another. The essays contained in this book talk about the importance of kindness and compassion -- something to which I always aspire but sometimes find difficult to accomplish. There is practical advice, encouragement, and sometimes some just good storytelling in which Pavlovitz shows that he doesn't always get it right himself.
I can't find enough good words to say about this book, to be honest. I also find it difficult to put into words of my own just what was all about. Much of it was about feelings.
Be encouraged, as John Pavlovitz says. And read this book.
November 9, 2021
Did I underline everything in this book? I think I may have.
'I often envision an exasperated Jesus coming back, and the first words out of his mouth to his followers as his feet hit the pavement being “You had one job: Love. So, what happened?”'
"Jesus’ gentle challenge has always pulled those of us willing to listen into the discomfort that comes with expanding our understanding of just how big a love we’re talking about here and what the implications are for us: the way we live and move through the world, the kind of audacious kindness we’re being asked to practice."
"Jesus wasn’t asking people to register for a religion but inviting them into a way of being in the world individually and collectively, a way of being that is rooted in a propulsive love for humanity."
"Religious people often talk about the thin places, those rare moments when the wall between humanity and divinity becomes like onion skin and we can see through to something beyond...This was a holy moment, a sudden clearing in the clouds. Without a hymn or a prayer or a pew or a minister, God felt present and close. It was a religious experience in the greatest sense of the words. It couldn’t be quantified or contained, and the overwhelming peace of the moment can’t be accurately described as much as I’d like to. This was God unboxed. It was divinity digging itself from the sand. It was a beautiful upsizing, breaking out of the shell. You know what that feels like, don’t you—an awe that escapes description and explanation?"
"People deserve a God who so loves the world, not a God who chooses America First; whose creation begins without divides and borders and walls, because there is only a single, interdependent community. People deserve a God who touched the leper and healed the sick and fed the starving and parted the seas and raised the dead—not a quivering idol who builds walls and drafts bathroom bills and launches social media crusades against migrant families."
"Despite our pedigree or profession or our claims of blessed assurance, none of us really knows what we’re doing here. You and I and Mother Teresa and Franklin Graham and the guy on the corner with a bullhorn condemning random pedestrians and the awkward high school student handing you your value meal—we are all working with incomplete information on the infinite, and we could all use a little kindness and a bit of mercy."
'There’s a dangerous hubris involved in claiming any kind of moral authority or precise theological clarity other than “Here’s the best guess I can make based on the available information—though I very well may be wrong.” (I’d love more Sunday sermons like that, and I think most church people would too.)'
"That’s the paradox of a right-sized God: God must be big enough to speak creation into being and set time into motion, and yet personal enough to know why those words of criticism I heard one day when I was five years old still make me feel insecure at fifty-one. God is architect of both the Milky Way and my heart. That’s a lot to ask and even more to make much sense of."
"The daily task of the believer is to lean into the acts of kindness and hospitality that you most resist, toward the people you least want to bless—to aspire to a place just slightly higher than you feel capable of reaching, because that’s how renovation happens, within and around you."
"If we were to reflect and have honest conversations with one another—and more importantly, with people outside our gatherings—we’d likely find that the most serious wounds to the body of Christ have been self-inflicted. The Church is not fighting the rebellious, faithless, heathen world, as I’d always been taught, but itself."
"If God is God, there’s no other option: they are each made of God stuff, no matter how bitter, cruel, or petty they might be or how unlikable you find them or how difficult to like they indeed might be."
"I’ve always joked that I was going to start a new church: The Church of Not Being Horrible. Our mission statement would simply be Don’t be horrible to people. Our what we believe doctrinal statements would be replaced by how we treat people promises: Don’t treat them as less worthy of love, respect, dignity, joy, and opportunity than you are."
"The central question at any given moment in the Church of Not Being Horrible is, Am I being horrible right now? If one concludes that they are, they endeavor to not do so. They lean into authentic relationships and they allow other people to help them see their blind spots of privilege, prejudice, and ignorance (the stuff that tends to make us horrible) and then they respond with an activated life that moves with a new intention. In other words, our sacred calling is to be decent, to be kind, to be compassionate, to be whatever it is that we believe this place is lacking: to be the kind of people the world needs—and it definitely needs less horrible these days."
"The myth of local churches is that their health is determined by their lack of conflict and the absence of turbulence, but just as with enduring marriages and lifelong friendships (or my big, loud Italian family), sometimes relational honesty generates bombastic exchanges, creates unpleasant conversations, and yields genuine discomfort, and these things aren’t necessarily signs of sickness, but proof of life. The most transformative communities are places where people live together in the unknowing, admitting that they’re trying to figure out the un-figure-out-able, and giving each other a break when they understandably fall on their faces."
"There is something transformative and sacred in belonging. When we are received as we are, we can drop our defenses, breathe deeply, and trust that we don’t need to earn or deserve a place; that unlike so many other places we find ourselves, there are no prerequisites or qualifiers hindering us there, no hidden agendas waiting to ensnare us, no eventual bait-and-switch coming. If there’s anything spiritual community should do, it’s this. It should give people a sense of found-ness. People experienced this in Jesus’ presence, whether priest or prostitute, whether revered soldier or shamed pariah, whether confidently pious or morally bankrupt."
"And religious conservatives certainly haven’t cornered the market on rightness tribalism. We left-leaning Christians are as prone to it as anyone..."
"Maybe we should check our halos and egos at the door."
"The United Church of Christ has long used the tagline God Is Still Speaking, and that’s only part of the story. If God is God, not only is God still speaking, but God is capable of speaking to and through each of us in ways that are entirely specific and fully unprecedented. It’s a beautiful prayer to reflect on what good news you’re bringing to the people you encounter in this life, what kind of gospel you’ve been preaching."
'I often envision an exasperated Jesus coming back, and the first words out of his mouth to his followers as his feet hit the pavement being “You had one job: Love. So, what happened?”'
"Jesus’ gentle challenge has always pulled those of us willing to listen into the discomfort that comes with expanding our understanding of just how big a love we’re talking about here and what the implications are for us: the way we live and move through the world, the kind of audacious kindness we’re being asked to practice."
"Jesus wasn’t asking people to register for a religion but inviting them into a way of being in the world individually and collectively, a way of being that is rooted in a propulsive love for humanity."
"Religious people often talk about the thin places, those rare moments when the wall between humanity and divinity becomes like onion skin and we can see through to something beyond...This was a holy moment, a sudden clearing in the clouds. Without a hymn or a prayer or a pew or a minister, God felt present and close. It was a religious experience in the greatest sense of the words. It couldn’t be quantified or contained, and the overwhelming peace of the moment can’t be accurately described as much as I’d like to. This was God unboxed. It was divinity digging itself from the sand. It was a beautiful upsizing, breaking out of the shell. You know what that feels like, don’t you—an awe that escapes description and explanation?"
"People deserve a God who so loves the world, not a God who chooses America First; whose creation begins without divides and borders and walls, because there is only a single, interdependent community. People deserve a God who touched the leper and healed the sick and fed the starving and parted the seas and raised the dead—not a quivering idol who builds walls and drafts bathroom bills and launches social media crusades against migrant families."
"Despite our pedigree or profession or our claims of blessed assurance, none of us really knows what we’re doing here. You and I and Mother Teresa and Franklin Graham and the guy on the corner with a bullhorn condemning random pedestrians and the awkward high school student handing you your value meal—we are all working with incomplete information on the infinite, and we could all use a little kindness and a bit of mercy."
'There’s a dangerous hubris involved in claiming any kind of moral authority or precise theological clarity other than “Here’s the best guess I can make based on the available information—though I very well may be wrong.” (I’d love more Sunday sermons like that, and I think most church people would too.)'
"That’s the paradox of a right-sized God: God must be big enough to speak creation into being and set time into motion, and yet personal enough to know why those words of criticism I heard one day when I was five years old still make me feel insecure at fifty-one. God is architect of both the Milky Way and my heart. That’s a lot to ask and even more to make much sense of."
"The daily task of the believer is to lean into the acts of kindness and hospitality that you most resist, toward the people you least want to bless—to aspire to a place just slightly higher than you feel capable of reaching, because that’s how renovation happens, within and around you."
"If we were to reflect and have honest conversations with one another—and more importantly, with people outside our gatherings—we’d likely find that the most serious wounds to the body of Christ have been self-inflicted. The Church is not fighting the rebellious, faithless, heathen world, as I’d always been taught, but itself."
"If God is God, there’s no other option: they are each made of God stuff, no matter how bitter, cruel, or petty they might be or how unlikable you find them or how difficult to like they indeed might be."
"I’ve always joked that I was going to start a new church: The Church of Not Being Horrible. Our mission statement would simply be Don’t be horrible to people. Our what we believe doctrinal statements would be replaced by how we treat people promises: Don’t treat them as less worthy of love, respect, dignity, joy, and opportunity than you are."
"The central question at any given moment in the Church of Not Being Horrible is, Am I being horrible right now? If one concludes that they are, they endeavor to not do so. They lean into authentic relationships and they allow other people to help them see their blind spots of privilege, prejudice, and ignorance (the stuff that tends to make us horrible) and then they respond with an activated life that moves with a new intention. In other words, our sacred calling is to be decent, to be kind, to be compassionate, to be whatever it is that we believe this place is lacking: to be the kind of people the world needs—and it definitely needs less horrible these days."
"The myth of local churches is that their health is determined by their lack of conflict and the absence of turbulence, but just as with enduring marriages and lifelong friendships (or my big, loud Italian family), sometimes relational honesty generates bombastic exchanges, creates unpleasant conversations, and yields genuine discomfort, and these things aren’t necessarily signs of sickness, but proof of life. The most transformative communities are places where people live together in the unknowing, admitting that they’re trying to figure out the un-figure-out-able, and giving each other a break when they understandably fall on their faces."
"There is something transformative and sacred in belonging. When we are received as we are, we can drop our defenses, breathe deeply, and trust that we don’t need to earn or deserve a place; that unlike so many other places we find ourselves, there are no prerequisites or qualifiers hindering us there, no hidden agendas waiting to ensnare us, no eventual bait-and-switch coming. If there’s anything spiritual community should do, it’s this. It should give people a sense of found-ness. People experienced this in Jesus’ presence, whether priest or prostitute, whether revered soldier or shamed pariah, whether confidently pious or morally bankrupt."
"And religious conservatives certainly haven’t cornered the market on rightness tribalism. We left-leaning Christians are as prone to it as anyone..."
"Maybe we should check our halos and egos at the door."
"The United Church of Christ has long used the tagline God Is Still Speaking, and that’s only part of the story. If God is God, not only is God still speaking, but God is capable of speaking to and through each of us in ways that are entirely specific and fully unprecedented. It’s a beautiful prayer to reflect on what good news you’re bringing to the people you encounter in this life, what kind of gospel you’ve been preaching."
February 20, 2022
3.5
“If the God you’re following and preaching to people in their times of pain is indeed an a-hole — it’s probably not God at all. It’s probably just you.”
Longtime pastor John Pavlovitz explains why he severed ties with the new, culty, politics-slathered American Church. This is a (big) departure from my normal reads but it was assigned in my book club and that’s that. I don’t think I’m the author’s intended audience. I agree with his exhausted exasperation in full. No one likes a sanctimonious, hypocritical butthole. If any part of this ruffles your feathers, this book may be for you.
“If the God you’re following and preaching to people in their times of pain is indeed an a-hole — it’s probably not God at all. It’s probably just you.”
Longtime pastor John Pavlovitz explains why he severed ties with the new, culty, politics-slathered American Church. This is a (big) departure from my normal reads but it was assigned in my book club and that’s that. I don’t think I’m the author’s intended audience. I agree with his exhausted exasperation in full. No one likes a sanctimonious, hypocritical butthole. If any part of this ruffles your feathers, this book may be for you.
June 5, 2022
A must read!
Read
December 22, 2023read for a theology class in school (i am not religious by any means so this wasn’t too enjoyable for me)
November 15, 2021
If God is LOVE, Don’t be a JERK by John Pavlovitz provides an insightful and concise reexamination of the role that “love thy neighbor” plays in today’s complex world. Pavlovitz uses captivating metaphor, clear language, and concise examples of why it is more important than ever to incorporate the missive into our daily lives for personal and social benefits that will better every aspect of our existence.
January 13, 2022
I loved this book. I have been following John Pavlovitz for several years and have seen him speak on many occasions (pre-pandemic). I have always been moved by his words and his ability to put true Christianity into a form which is relatable.
I grew up in a truly "Jesus Christian" church in 1950/60's Southern California where everyone was welcomed with open arms and the love for one another was palpable. The sense of community in this church was one I have ached for since we moved from the west coast to a small town in Virginia. There have been so many times I have wished to belong to a church where I could feel so celebrated and appreciated, where the love, charity, understanding and tolerance was real. What I have found instead were places of worship steeped in judgement, fear, close-mindedness, cliquishness and turmoil. Each time I have left those churches knowing that was not Christianity. I have given up on organized religion and focused more on my own personal (albeit lonely) spirituality, always missing the community of giving and kinship in which I grew up.
When I started following Mr. Pavlovitz on social media I was immediately reminded of how I felt as a child in my church community and saw that his experience and explanation of Christianity was so much like my own. His books and articles have given me the faith that there is a community out there of people like me who understand that true Christianity is soulful and rewarding not what were seeing now on every form of social media and cable news programs as hate-based, harsh, uncharitable, unethical, idol worshiping "Evangelical Christianity". My thoughts each time I see that is "Jesus would weep if he could see what has been done in His name".
Thank you John for an insightful, educational, loving book. You give people like me hope in society. If everyone would read this book and agree that this is true Jesus Christianity we could change the world.
I grew up in a truly "Jesus Christian" church in 1950/60's Southern California where everyone was welcomed with open arms and the love for one another was palpable. The sense of community in this church was one I have ached for since we moved from the west coast to a small town in Virginia. There have been so many times I have wished to belong to a church where I could feel so celebrated and appreciated, where the love, charity, understanding and tolerance was real. What I have found instead were places of worship steeped in judgement, fear, close-mindedness, cliquishness and turmoil. Each time I have left those churches knowing that was not Christianity. I have given up on organized religion and focused more on my own personal (albeit lonely) spirituality, always missing the community of giving and kinship in which I grew up.
When I started following Mr. Pavlovitz on social media I was immediately reminded of how I felt as a child in my church community and saw that his experience and explanation of Christianity was so much like my own. His books and articles have given me the faith that there is a community out there of people like me who understand that true Christianity is soulful and rewarding not what were seeing now on every form of social media and cable news programs as hate-based, harsh, uncharitable, unethical, idol worshiping "Evangelical Christianity". My thoughts each time I see that is "Jesus would weep if he could see what has been done in His name".
Thank you John for an insightful, educational, loving book. You give people like me hope in society. If everyone would read this book and agree that this is true Jesus Christianity we could change the world.
September 27, 2021
My Review
If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk: Finding a Faith That Makes Us Better Humans
If God is Love, Don't Be A Jerk may hit you right between the eyes. No matter what you believe or what political affiliation you might identify with, this book should make you pause and examine your beliefs. I couldn't put it down as the author seemed to be living in my headspace during these traumatic times.
John Pavlovitz will have you exploring your beliefs about God and religion and where they originated in your life. Were we blindly led along our path to believe what we do? Did we question and explore and challenge the religious authority in our lives that led us to where we are today? Is the way we treat people based on our religious background? Are we cruel in our judgment because we believe that is what God tells us to do? How do we interpret God's love? Is it a love of inclusion or exclusion? If God is Love Don't Be a Jerk should have us all examining how we live in the name of religion.
I would imagine the author is going to get flack over this piece of work because it goes against the norm of what we expect from books about Christianity. Finally, someone says what many of us have wondered but not dared to speak in our religious affiliations. John Pavolitz in If God Is Love Don't Be A Jerk, Finding a Faith That Makes Us Better Human Beings, challenges all of us to do better in our lives and our interactions with others.
If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk: Finding a Faith That Makes Us Better Humans
If God is Love, Don't Be A Jerk may hit you right between the eyes. No matter what you believe or what political affiliation you might identify with, this book should make you pause and examine your beliefs. I couldn't put it down as the author seemed to be living in my headspace during these traumatic times.
John Pavlovitz will have you exploring your beliefs about God and religion and where they originated in your life. Were we blindly led along our path to believe what we do? Did we question and explore and challenge the religious authority in our lives that led us to where we are today? Is the way we treat people based on our religious background? Are we cruel in our judgment because we believe that is what God tells us to do? How do we interpret God's love? Is it a love of inclusion or exclusion? If God is Love Don't Be a Jerk should have us all examining how we live in the name of religion.
I would imagine the author is going to get flack over this piece of work because it goes against the norm of what we expect from books about Christianity. Finally, someone says what many of us have wondered but not dared to speak in our religious affiliations. John Pavolitz in If God Is Love Don't Be A Jerk, Finding a Faith That Makes Us Better Human Beings, challenges all of us to do better in our lives and our interactions with others.
October 21, 2021
Sometimes you find the thing you need more than you realize. That was true for me when I found this book. Pavlovitz puts into words so many of the feelings, frustrations, and fears I have experienced over the better part of the last decade. The anger and disbelief that people who call themselves Christians regularly act and talk like anything but. I found this book to be a great comfort. I also accept the challenge of doing my own little part in being a better Christian: don't be a jerk. I think of the times I let my frustration and impatience color my words and deeds. I'm not proud of those moments. My goal is to have fewer of those and an increased amount of caring for and helping others even in the smallest ways. Smiling, having a gentle tone in my voice, really listening to others without the need to respond....these are all things that I can do. As Pavlovitz assures us, this is true evangelizing. This is putting the word of Christ in practice. It's doable and necessary. I applaud his courage and I thank him deeply for helping me put on the brakes emotionally and mentally. Faith doesn't need a fancy religion or a building peopled with individuals trying to preserve their safe little environment at the expense of the greater need. I hope more people can get on Pavlovitz' bandwagon and start reimagining Christianity in the ways that Jesus did in fact teach us. This is my hope. This is my prayer.
July 2, 2022
I read this book mainly as a challenge to myself to read books from a different perspective, hoping I can either strengthen my own beliefs, or change them due to a better argument. However, I don’t believe this book makes a good argument for holding to the ideals the author is trying propose. The book comes across as, we should accept the worlds shifting morals instead of Christian morals so we can be truly Christ like and loving. This doesn’t strike me as a good argument. Because truly one of the most loving things people can do is correct you, and point you in the right direction. In conclusion, while the book does call us rightly to embody the love of God in this world today, it doesn’t take the right method in doing so.
May 1, 2022
I can't say I "enjoyed" this book - but it was excellent. There is a great divide within the contemporary Christian community. And it isn't about traditional vs. contemporary worship. It is about theology. It is about our understanding of God and the call of Jesus. It is about our understanding of what the church and Christian community are supposed to reflect and reveal. It is about the heart of Christianity in the United States, which Pavlovitz convincingly argues has been co-opted and twisted into a community of faith that no longer resembles the teachings of Jesus Christ. MAGA Christianity, those who refuse to love all of God's children regardless of color, sexual orientation, physical ability, faith tradition or national origin, has virtually taken over Evangelical congregations who now listen more closely to a former President than the words of Jesus.
This is a hard book to read, because it makes it so clear why so many people have left active life in the institutional church. When the Jesus proclaimed on the inside no longer reflects the idea of a loving God, people walk away. When a church begins to focus on who is out, who is more sinful than they, and wags a finger at others, those on the outside have no motivation to come in. When God is invoked to manipulate a political agenda rather than shape that agenda in a Christ-like manner, people will walk away from being manipulated and used.
Pavlovitz is a former mega-church pastor from the Bible belt, and when the ethos of Evangelical Christianity began to conflict too much with his understanding of a loving God, he had to walk in new directions. He is part of a growing number of people who no longer call themselves Christians, but Followers of Jesus, because the word Christian now carries such negative baggage. I can connect with much of what Pavlovitz states. Sadly, the bad theology and negativity of modern Evangelicalism has marred all Christian traditions - even those of the more progressive traditions which seek to walk in the ways of the Biblical Christ. I still believe in the institutional church; but like the Church that needed to be Reformed 500+ years ago, the church in the U.S. needs to be redeemed and brought back on track. Pavlovitz holds up the mirror to the modern church and helps us to see a less-than-faithful reflection. I hope it may spark needed change of heart amidst all those who seek to claim the name of Jesus and Lord and Savior.
This is a hard book to read, because it makes it so clear why so many people have left active life in the institutional church. When the Jesus proclaimed on the inside no longer reflects the idea of a loving God, people walk away. When a church begins to focus on who is out, who is more sinful than they, and wags a finger at others, those on the outside have no motivation to come in. When God is invoked to manipulate a political agenda rather than shape that agenda in a Christ-like manner, people will walk away from being manipulated and used.
Pavlovitz is a former mega-church pastor from the Bible belt, and when the ethos of Evangelical Christianity began to conflict too much with his understanding of a loving God, he had to walk in new directions. He is part of a growing number of people who no longer call themselves Christians, but Followers of Jesus, because the word Christian now carries such negative baggage. I can connect with much of what Pavlovitz states. Sadly, the bad theology and negativity of modern Evangelicalism has marred all Christian traditions - even those of the more progressive traditions which seek to walk in the ways of the Biblical Christ. I still believe in the institutional church; but like the Church that needed to be Reformed 500+ years ago, the church in the U.S. needs to be redeemed and brought back on track. Pavlovitz holds up the mirror to the modern church and helps us to see a less-than-faithful reflection. I hope it may spark needed change of heart amidst all those who seek to claim the name of Jesus and Lord and Savior.
January 23, 2023
It took me awhile to finish this book, only because I haven't had much time to read nonfiction in the last several months. However, even working through this book just a chapter at a time, every few weeks, was inspiring.
Pavlovitz addresses different problems within 21st-century Christianity. While much of this book does address American politics and the issues with Trump Christianity, Pavlovitz also spends time pointing out his own flaws as well as the flaws of progressive Christians.
The theme truly is that God is love, which is repeated and rephrased throughout the entire book.
I knocked off one star because sometimes Pavolovitz likes to write long meandering sentences which can be hard to follow.
Pavlovitz addresses different problems within 21st-century Christianity. While much of this book does address American politics and the issues with Trump Christianity, Pavlovitz also spends time pointing out his own flaws as well as the flaws of progressive Christians.
The theme truly is that God is love, which is repeated and rephrased throughout the entire book.
I knocked off one star because sometimes Pavolovitz likes to write long meandering sentences which can be hard to follow.
July 6, 2021
If God is Love, Don’t be a Jerk, John Pavlovitz, Westminster John Knox Press
As I read this book, I imagined a conversation between the author and Rob Bell, the author of Love Wins.
Rob, I read your book and it really got me thinking. I could write about the same topics, but I would make it clearer.
Rob responds, “My book isn’t clear?”
John, “Not really, you dance around the topics of hell and salvation but when I finished reading, I wasn’t sure where you stood. Do you believe everybody goes to heaven or are you just questioning whether a God of love and a place of eternal judgment are compatible?”
Rob challenges him, “If you think you can do a better job, then have at it.”
John takes up the challenge and this book is the result. (My imagined conversation)
There is no hell. We are all good people. Most evangelicals are white republicans, and they don’t give a damn about anybody else. Also, the Bible would have been written differently if there were some women on the editorial board.
Now, in case you get the impression that I didn’t get anything out of the book. That is not accurate.
I think every Christian should read the first chapter, “You had one job”. (Spoiler alert) We are to love God and love others. That preaches.
As the author states at Kindle location 35 “…I often envision an exasperated Jesus coming back, and the first words out of his mouth to his followers as his feet hit the pavement being, ‘You had one job: Love. So, what happened’.” I wonder the same thing.
I also wonder if lack of love was the impetus for the rest of the book. In other words, would the writer have fled orthodoxy if we all loved our neighbors as commanded?
In calling us to love the author has given away too much ground, even questioning the authority of the very Scripture that gives the command to love.
I agree that many of the messages that are preached and many that I have heard have not oozed love. I have heard it said that Jesus taught more about hell than heaven so we should preach more about hell than heaven. Just simple math. I would counter with some other statistics—Jesus says more about finances than he does about hell so let’s hear more about our finances and stewardship thereof.
But the solution is not to do away with hell.
I agree with the author’s point that much that is heard from evangelicals demeans or, in some way, does not appreciate the gifts God has given women. However, suggesting this is because the Bible was written by men questions the inspiration of Scripture.
Didn’t God oversee the writing?
The author in another chapter makes a big deal that God is not male and at the same time writes of God’s feminine qualities. So, getting back to the point about the Bible authors foisting their male gender on the words of the Bible it occurred to me that, as the author states, the Hebrew word “ruach” (spirit) is feminine. That being the case can’t we say the feminine was represented on the Bible’s editorial board. If the Spirit didn’t like what was being written, if it were too male, the Spirit of God could have it removed.
Besides the issue just raised Mr. Pavlovitz doesn’t clearly state that the Bible is not superintended or inspired by God but he does take a few digs at the authority of the Bible for today. For example, when speaking of Genesis 1-2 he questions whether this 4000 year old poem is clear enough for us today. If we throw out Gen 1-2 because the chapters are a poem, what can we get from the Psalms that Jesus quoted with authority?
Two other things had me scratching my head, and he may just be exaggerating to make a point, but…. he states that “81% of white evangelicals ended up passionately embracing both him (Donald Trump) and that message (Make America Great Again). As far as I know no survey has measured the passion or the real reason so many evangelicals supported Trump.
He also writes that the expression, “Love the sinner, hate the sin” was an invention of the Religious Right (location 1072), When did Augustine join the religious right? It appears he was one of the first to say something like that and I heard the expression long before Mr. Pavlovitz was born.
It seemed to me that the author was less than humble in claiming he has heard all the arguments against what he has to say and don’t bother me with your concerns. However, when I got to Chapter 17 High Horses and Better Angels the author is clear that we need to hold our opinions without a sense of moral superiority. (Kindle location 2205). That reminds me of a quote from Anne Lamott (I think) “Our opinions may not be right, but we think they are, or we would change them.”
As I read the book I kept asking if the message of the Bible, the good news, spoken in love, and not with the judgmental, hateful timbre often heard, would have kept the author within the boundaries of orthodoxy.
In making a point about the lack of love Mr. Pavlovitz, by his own admission, has stepped over the rather expansive lines of orthodoxy.(Kindle location 508) So what basis does he have for, Love your neighbor as yourself?
I hear what he is saying, and it should affect every message I preach, every word I say and every interaction I have. We have one job, Love.
I received a copy of this book through netgalley.com with the understanding i would read it and offer a review.
As I read this book, I imagined a conversation between the author and Rob Bell, the author of Love Wins.
Rob, I read your book and it really got me thinking. I could write about the same topics, but I would make it clearer.
Rob responds, “My book isn’t clear?”
John, “Not really, you dance around the topics of hell and salvation but when I finished reading, I wasn’t sure where you stood. Do you believe everybody goes to heaven or are you just questioning whether a God of love and a place of eternal judgment are compatible?”
Rob challenges him, “If you think you can do a better job, then have at it.”
John takes up the challenge and this book is the result. (My imagined conversation)
There is no hell. We are all good people. Most evangelicals are white republicans, and they don’t give a damn about anybody else. Also, the Bible would have been written differently if there were some women on the editorial board.
Now, in case you get the impression that I didn’t get anything out of the book. That is not accurate.
I think every Christian should read the first chapter, “You had one job”. (Spoiler alert) We are to love God and love others. That preaches.
As the author states at Kindle location 35 “…I often envision an exasperated Jesus coming back, and the first words out of his mouth to his followers as his feet hit the pavement being, ‘You had one job: Love. So, what happened’.” I wonder the same thing.
I also wonder if lack of love was the impetus for the rest of the book. In other words, would the writer have fled orthodoxy if we all loved our neighbors as commanded?
In calling us to love the author has given away too much ground, even questioning the authority of the very Scripture that gives the command to love.
I agree that many of the messages that are preached and many that I have heard have not oozed love. I have heard it said that Jesus taught more about hell than heaven so we should preach more about hell than heaven. Just simple math. I would counter with some other statistics—Jesus says more about finances than he does about hell so let’s hear more about our finances and stewardship thereof.
But the solution is not to do away with hell.
I agree with the author’s point that much that is heard from evangelicals demeans or, in some way, does not appreciate the gifts God has given women. However, suggesting this is because the Bible was written by men questions the inspiration of Scripture.
Didn’t God oversee the writing?
The author in another chapter makes a big deal that God is not male and at the same time writes of God’s feminine qualities. So, getting back to the point about the Bible authors foisting their male gender on the words of the Bible it occurred to me that, as the author states, the Hebrew word “ruach” (spirit) is feminine. That being the case can’t we say the feminine was represented on the Bible’s editorial board. If the Spirit didn’t like what was being written, if it were too male, the Spirit of God could have it removed.
Besides the issue just raised Mr. Pavlovitz doesn’t clearly state that the Bible is not superintended or inspired by God but he does take a few digs at the authority of the Bible for today. For example, when speaking of Genesis 1-2 he questions whether this 4000 year old poem is clear enough for us today. If we throw out Gen 1-2 because the chapters are a poem, what can we get from the Psalms that Jesus quoted with authority?
Two other things had me scratching my head, and he may just be exaggerating to make a point, but…. he states that “81% of white evangelicals ended up passionately embracing both him (Donald Trump) and that message (Make America Great Again). As far as I know no survey has measured the passion or the real reason so many evangelicals supported Trump.
He also writes that the expression, “Love the sinner, hate the sin” was an invention of the Religious Right (location 1072), When did Augustine join the religious right? It appears he was one of the first to say something like that and I heard the expression long before Mr. Pavlovitz was born.
It seemed to me that the author was less than humble in claiming he has heard all the arguments against what he has to say and don’t bother me with your concerns. However, when I got to Chapter 17 High Horses and Better Angels the author is clear that we need to hold our opinions without a sense of moral superiority. (Kindle location 2205). That reminds me of a quote from Anne Lamott (I think) “Our opinions may not be right, but we think they are, or we would change them.”
As I read the book I kept asking if the message of the Bible, the good news, spoken in love, and not with the judgmental, hateful timbre often heard, would have kept the author within the boundaries of orthodoxy.
In making a point about the lack of love Mr. Pavlovitz, by his own admission, has stepped over the rather expansive lines of orthodoxy.(Kindle location 508) So what basis does he have for, Love your neighbor as yourself?
I hear what he is saying, and it should affect every message I preach, every word I say and every interaction I have. We have one job, Love.
I received a copy of this book through netgalley.com with the understanding i would read it and offer a review.
August 22, 2025
While I don’t agree with the several of John’s theological conclusions there is no arguing with the fact that those of us who claim to follow Christ have often been failing to live out the love we are called to show to the world.
July 7, 2022
Simply put, John Pavlovitz has become a voice of an everyman theologian. Dealing with everyday issues in today’s world, reminding the reader that compassion, consideration and even anger are appropriate. The key phrase in making these relationships and community better is “don’t be a jerk.”
December 22, 2021
A Review of the Audiobook
Published by eChristian in November of 2021.
Read by the author, John Pavlovitz
Duration: 6 hours, 19 minutes
Unabridged.
John Pavlovitz is a minister who has done a lot of thinking about how Jesus told us to act and how formal "name brand" Christianity often acts to those that it deems as "less". We all know that thinking of people as "less" is not really a thing Christ endorses, but it is still an all too often sad reality.
Who are the less that have been in the news lately? Immigrants, LGTBQ people, Muslims...and more.
Pavlovitz asks:
"If God is love and if you're emulating that God, then you should be loving. If you claim a religious worldview or have spiritual aspirations, those should yield more compassion, not less; more decency, not less; more generosity, not less. If not, what's the point of having them?"
Great question. What's the point?
I've had these thoughts more than once in the last 6 years, coinciding with the candidacy and presidency of the 45th President. If nothing else, he shook a lot of things loose.
Pavlovitz doesn't really follow a mainstream religious tradition any longer. He boils it all down very simply - God calls us to love each other. He gave us a great example in the person of Jesus. Aspire to that. If your theology is in the way of you doing that, ditch the theology.
I don't agree with everything Pavlovitz talks about, but I found some parts extremely compelling. Specifically, I found myself in serious agreement with his chapter on prayer.
I listened to this as an audiobook from my library so I was not able to take notes as well as I could have on paper. I have added this book to my wish list to get as a paper copy so I can mark it up and think about it harder later on.
I rate this audiobook 5 stars out of 5.
https://dwdsreviews.blogspot.com/2021...
Published by eChristian in November of 2021.
Read by the author, John Pavlovitz
Duration: 6 hours, 19 minutes
Unabridged.
John Pavlovitz is a minister who has done a lot of thinking about how Jesus told us to act and how formal "name brand" Christianity often acts to those that it deems as "less". We all know that thinking of people as "less" is not really a thing Christ endorses, but it is still an all too often sad reality.
Who are the less that have been in the news lately? Immigrants, LGTBQ people, Muslims...and more.
Pavlovitz asks:
"If God is love and if you're emulating that God, then you should be loving. If you claim a religious worldview or have spiritual aspirations, those should yield more compassion, not less; more decency, not less; more generosity, not less. If not, what's the point of having them?"
Great question. What's the point?
I've had these thoughts more than once in the last 6 years, coinciding with the candidacy and presidency of the 45th President. If nothing else, he shook a lot of things loose.
Pavlovitz doesn't really follow a mainstream religious tradition any longer. He boils it all down very simply - God calls us to love each other. He gave us a great example in the person of Jesus. Aspire to that. If your theology is in the way of you doing that, ditch the theology.
I don't agree with everything Pavlovitz talks about, but I found some parts extremely compelling. Specifically, I found myself in serious agreement with his chapter on prayer.
I listened to this as an audiobook from my library so I was not able to take notes as well as I could have on paper. I have added this book to my wish list to get as a paper copy so I can mark it up and think about it harder later on.
I rate this audiobook 5 stars out of 5.
https://dwdsreviews.blogspot.com/2021...
July 9, 2023
As a person who doesn’t identify as Christian but strongly believes in Christ’s teachings (counterintuitive, I know) I truly enjoyed this books message. I came across this book on my own so when I started it I almost stopped reading because religious “self help” books are a major turn off but something told me to keep reading and I’m glad I did. The authors message explores the title itself but delves into other aspects of unboxing religions. I liked his idea that small religion implodes on itself. I appreciate the metaphors and stories he uses to tell his understanding of love thy neighbor and calling our hypocrisy of evangelicals while explain the etymology and importance of evangelism. He explains why being spiritual without religion is how we break our previous notions of religions practiced. Very good read and opened my mind to questions that seem natural to me about human decency while making me stop and think.
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