The Velveteen Principles for Women: How to Shatter the Myth of Perfection and Embrace All That You Really Are

by Toni Raiten-D'Antonio

"What is Real?" asked the Rabbit one day. . . .

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. ". . . it doesn't happen to people who break easily or have sharp edges or who have to be carefully kept . . . once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

The moral of The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams, captured in the words of the wise old Skin Horse, inspired psychotherapist and professor Toni Raiten-D'Antonio's bestseller The Velveteen Principles . It also provides one of the cornerstone concepts—that individuality makes every woman uniquely valuable—for her much-awaited second book, The Velveteen Principles for Women .

Drawing from many sources—the stories of devoted readers, students, therapy clients, and even her own life—the author offers a provocative, inspiring, and practical guide for women who want to be Real. With wit, wisdom, and insight, she teaches readers how they

All the tools for creating a Real life are here in The Velveteen Principles for Women . Keen observations shine light on the forces that promote generic concepts of beauty and happiness. Stories from the lives of Real women offer inspiration. Emotionally powerful exercises help you find your Real values and passions. And the Principles—empathy, generosity, courage, ethics and more—are signposts leading to love and fulfillment.

The Velveteen Principles for Women is a motivational guidebook for those who want to identify the sources of their unhappiness and become genuinely Real themselves. It is essential reading for women who want to free themselves from self-doubt, silence their inner critics, and live as the Real, unique, valuable women they are meant to be.

Sales Points

Genres: Self Help

220 pages, Hardcover

First published May 1, 2007

About the author

Toni Raiten-D'Antonio is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW).

Reviews

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

One of the very few slef-help books I've ever read cover-to-cover, I only rolled my eyes a few times. This book is all about becoming "real", meaning that there is no perfect woman, so you should do the best you can, and free yourself from societal expectations. Honestly, I figured out most of the pointers in this book when I was 16-years-old and struggling to free myself from my family's oppressive religious beliefs and strict standards of perfection. But the book was a nice endorsement of the self-truths that I grappled with as I became an adult. Good book if you're feeling like there is far too much pressure on today's women to be beautiful, thin, a perfect housekeeper, a perfect mom and a super-earner employee.

[Misty Lambert · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an incredible book all women should read. I was going through a little/huge deppression problem while living in Utah, and this book really helped me get out of it. I'm still trying to get out of my self-induced shell, but this book really really helped. Not to mention, it gave me hope and life again, and helped me to stop and love myself. EVERYONE should read this book.

There is also a version for all people, so if your husbands wanted to read it or something, you could get the "generic" Velveteen Principles.

[Jakki · Rating 4 out of 5]

I checked this book out at the library because I have the "Velveteen Rabbit" book my mom gave me may, many years ago. I've always loved that story about becoming "real". This book is a GREAT partner for it - lots of good ideas, tips, etc for women living a life of acceptance of self. I like how the author uses the story to make her practical points. I'd like to buy a copy and place it next to my Velveteen Rabbit book.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book helps you love yourself as you are now, not for your aspirations and goals or your 'best self'. if you encounter it with need, she's really helpful. It doesn't seem to be imformed yet by the idea that beauty can also indicate physical health, that it can heal too, and that it IS attainable by all.

[Roniq · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book about living the REAL you based on the Velveteen Rabbits principles!!! Useful tools for facing "Object Culture", Finding what you believe, developing your mission statement based on values and methods, silencing outside critics and other peoples opinions, finding and holding on to gratefulness and living a life with ethics,love and flexibility. Highly recommend!!!!

[Tammy B · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was very insightful for myself and helpful in so many ways. I have given this book as a gift to several friends and they in turn have done the same. For me it spoke a truth that I have been trying to express for a very long time. I highly recommend it.

[Marka]

I can't wait to get this! The original velveteen principles was very good. But now a women's version...yay!!!

[Laurie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book to help understand yourself as a women and the many rolls you play.

[Roanne]

still reading...seems okay

[Melissa Therkleson · Rating 4 out of 5]

i liked the ideas this book presented, helped me feel better about just being myself.

[Alexis · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy read, pick up anytime and read a few chapters. Empowering and positive for women.