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The Girls Inside
A gripping, compelling psychological thriller about a cult, a fire, and the dark secrets that four young girls have carried with them but can no longer keep buried...Blue grew up in the Black House.In remotest Wales, Joseph Carillo recruited young, lonely women to join his community and adopt his erratic views. Blue's mother was one of them. But when the Black House goes up in flames, Blue escapes to freedom and never stops running.Twenty years later, when Blue's old dormmate commits suicide, Blue receives a strange call. She has been awarded sole custody of Natasha's daughter. But things don't add up. The girls haven't spoken since the night of the fire.As Blue begins to dig into Natasha's life, her suspicions take her all the way back to that fateful night...But will the truth help Blue to face her past, or will it put everyone she holds close in danger?The addictive, dark and redemptive psychological thriller you've been waiting for in 2021 - for fans of Lisa Jewell, Louise Jensen, Phoebe Morgan, CL Taylor, Cara Hunter and KL Slater.
Praise for NJ 'Dark, gripping, unexpected. Insanely good - like, Dark Places good' ELLE CROFT'Brilliantly plotted, tense and atmospheric' RACHAEL BLOK'Grips you from the first line through to the nail-biting conclusion. Psychological suspense at its best' VICTORIA SELMAN'Clever, unexpected, brilliantly plotted; I literally could not put it down' CLARE EMPSON
Praise for NJ 'Dark, gripping, unexpected. Insanely good - like, Dark Places good' ELLE CROFT'Brilliantly plotted, tense and atmospheric' RACHAEL BLOK'Grips you from the first line through to the nail-biting conclusion. Psychological suspense at its best' VICTORIA SELMAN'Clever, unexpected, brilliantly plotted; I literally could not put it down' CLARE EMPSON
256 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 29, 2021
22 people are currently reading
338 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 64 reviews
April 7, 2021
I'm fascinated by Cults and the reality that their leaders have the power to coerce their members into shocking acts. So this book was a perfect read for me.
I read it over 10 days through Pigeonhole. If you’re not familiar with them, they release books in what they call Staves (sections/stages). A new Stave is released each day and takes about 15-30 minutes to read. This book was so interesting, I hated waiting an entire day for the next Stave!
As a teenager, I read my mother’s hand-me-down books and she loved true crime. I remember my first read/exposure to Cults was the Manson murders. I read everything I could get my hands on at the time because I was blown away by it all.
Blue spent most of her childhood at The Black House. Its leader—Joseph Corillo—must have been incredibly enchanting to lure so many women and children into his “communal living” arrangement, with his crazy rules.
Blue closed the door on her past and didn’t stay in contact with anyone from that period in her life. So she’s shocked when she’s informed that a fellow Cult member and friend—Natasha—has committed suicide, leaving custody of her daughter to Blue. But Natasha’s suicide doesn’t make sense to Blue, so she starts digging around in Natasha’s life and uncovers some disturbing details!
I really enjoyed this book, except for the ending, which seemed too tidy.
Thank you to Pigeonhole, Orion Publishing, and N.J. Mackay for this free digital ARC, in exchange for my honest opinion!
My Rating: 4 ⭐️’s
Published: March 29th 2021 by Orion Publishing
Recommend: Yes!
@NikiMackayBooks @orionbooks @ThePigeonholeHQ
#TheGirlsInside #psychologicalthriller #NoRulesJustThrills #InExchangeForReview #JustFinished #BookReview #Cults
More on the author:
Website: http://nikimackay.com/
Twitter: NikiMackayBooks
I read it over 10 days through Pigeonhole. If you’re not familiar with them, they release books in what they call Staves (sections/stages). A new Stave is released each day and takes about 15-30 minutes to read. This book was so interesting, I hated waiting an entire day for the next Stave!
As a teenager, I read my mother’s hand-me-down books and she loved true crime. I remember my first read/exposure to Cults was the Manson murders. I read everything I could get my hands on at the time because I was blown away by it all.
Blue spent most of her childhood at The Black House. Its leader—Joseph Corillo—must have been incredibly enchanting to lure so many women and children into his “communal living” arrangement, with his crazy rules.
Blue closed the door on her past and didn’t stay in contact with anyone from that period in her life. So she’s shocked when she’s informed that a fellow Cult member and friend—Natasha—has committed suicide, leaving custody of her daughter to Blue. But Natasha’s suicide doesn’t make sense to Blue, so she starts digging around in Natasha’s life and uncovers some disturbing details!
I really enjoyed this book, except for the ending, which seemed too tidy.
Thank you to Pigeonhole, Orion Publishing, and N.J. Mackay for this free digital ARC, in exchange for my honest opinion!
My Rating: 4 ⭐️’s
Published: March 29th 2021 by Orion Publishing
Recommend: Yes!
@NikiMackayBooks @orionbooks @ThePigeonholeHQ
#TheGirlsInside #psychologicalthriller #NoRulesJustThrills #InExchangeForReview #JustFinished #BookReview #Cults
More on the author:
Website: http://nikimackay.com/
Twitter: NikiMackayBooks
April 7, 2021
This was an enjoyable story in parts deeply disturbing, in other parts absolutely gripping. It tells the tale of a cult headed by an evil, sadistic man, Jopseph Carillo and the power he exerted over those in his Black House, a cult, based in Wales. After careful planning a fire is started that sees a small group of what I term inmates, escape to the safety of the outside world. However, can one ever really escape from the damage a place like the Black House inflicts on one's psyche? I have to give this story points for painting both the police and social services in a positive light for a change, unlike books in which essential services are practically deemed redundant. At the center of the story is Blue Sillitoe, one of the escapees and her journey from the inside to the bigger world outside and those who cross her path in aiding and hindering her healing. I also found the ending though concerning, realistic. 4 Stars.
May 20, 2021
This is Niki Mackay's deeply disturbing story, focusing on a cult and the aftermath on the lives of those that lived there. Blue Sillitoe lived within the cult, at the Black House, after she was taken there by her mother who had been enticed by Joseph Carillo, their enigmatic leader. After a huge fire, Blue escaped but her mother died so she was left to the care of social services. Blue later went to London and met an unlikely friend named Isaac, who becomes her rock. When something happens to Blue’s friend, Natasha, her ten-year-old daughter, Pen, comes to live with Blue, changing Blue's life dramatically once again. However, not everything is as it might appear and DI Annie Grafton believes that there is more to Natasha’s disappearance...
The book is brimming with twists and turns and some parts make for difficult reading but it's an excellent tale. Full of intrigue, the story pulls you in right from the beginning and includes some hugely compulsive character development as the minutia and drama of the protagonists' personal and professional lives are depicted with dexterity. A remarkable tale from start to finish.
I read The Girls Inside in staves with other Pigeonholers as part of a group. A special thank you to Niki Mackay and The Pigeonhole for a complimentary copy of this novel at my request. This review is my unbiased opinion.
The book is brimming with twists and turns and some parts make for difficult reading but it's an excellent tale. Full of intrigue, the story pulls you in right from the beginning and includes some hugely compulsive character development as the minutia and drama of the protagonists' personal and professional lives are depicted with dexterity. A remarkable tale from start to finish.
I read The Girls Inside in staves with other Pigeonholers as part of a group. A special thank you to Niki Mackay and The Pigeonhole for a complimentary copy of this novel at my request. This review is my unbiased opinion.
March 29, 2021
The Girls Inside is a gripping and compulsive psychological thriller about the aftermath of being involved in a cult; even years later their lives are deeply affected by what they witnessed and experienced first hand. But being left a baby to care for and bring up after a fellow cult member, and friend, who you have spoken to in years passes away is more than a shocker. A compelling and engrossing read from start to finish. Highly recommended.
March 16, 2021
This plot is so different from anything I have ever read that I found myself totally immersed in this thriller. As the story progresses the complexity of the mystery pile up, imploring you to get answers.
A riveting and captivating read with captivating characters.
A riveting and captivating read with captivating characters.
April 7, 2021
An emotional rollercoaster of a book. Hard to read at times, but beautifully written. Just a shame that I, and my fellow Pigeons had worked out all the twists long before the end. Some moments of absolute tension as we followed the story, and pure emotion as I read about the background to the story, which was harrowing.
For me, the Natasha chapters spoiled the building tension, so that when Blue learns the truth, the reader already knows.
The ambiguous ending is perhaps more realistic than a neatly tied up climax, but I'm not sure. The last stave is slightly clunky with police procedural errors, and geographical anomalies too. Did enjoy reading though.
Thanks to Nikki and Pigeonhole.
For me, the Natasha chapters spoiled the building tension, so that when Blue learns the truth, the reader already knows.
The ambiguous ending is perhaps more realistic than a neatly tied up climax, but I'm not sure. The last stave is slightly clunky with police procedural errors, and geographical anomalies too. Did enjoy reading though.
Thanks to Nikki and Pigeonhole.
April 7, 2021
I have always been fascinated by religious cults and what makes people join them. How you can have such power over someone that you can make them bend to your will (think Charles Manson and the killing of Sharon Tate and her friends). Then there was Jonestown and WACO amongst others, including The Moonies (or Unification Church) – though no killing or mass suicides. I won’t go into too much detail as I have already written about it in another review but suffice to say that Children of God – which became Family International in 2004 – not only permitted sex with children but actually encouraged it, believing it was ‘a divine right’. It still exists today but without the underage sex. Potential members of cults are often vulnerable, unattached and in their late teens/early twenties, making it ‘easier’ for them to be brainwashed.
The Black House is the extreme. Natasha’s mother Sienna was the first to be recruited by spiritual leader Joseph Carillo, whose teachings were based around the evil of the outside world and the suspicion that surrounded figures of authority like the police and teachers. But the evil inside The Black House made the outside world look like Noddyland. Mothers became the ‘Aunts’ who no longer tied themselves to their own children, who were punished for calling them ‘mummy’. Young children were starved and often beaten. The girls would ‘mature’ into sex partners for Carillo and the older boys and eventually married off while in their teens. What they all endured was horrendous, but the loss of their own mother was one of the hardest.
Following a fire at The Black House in which many of the adults died, Blue, Lisa, Natasha, her brother Brodie and Sienna escaped. Once outside the three girls were separated, supposedly for their own good. Blue meets ageing rock star Isaac, who takes her under his wing. She works for him in his record shop Pop Planet. She is recovering as well as can be expected until she receives an unexpected call. Something has happened to Natasha and Blue has been given custody of her 10-year-old daughter Pen, who she has never met or even knew existed. But something doesn’t add up and soon DI Annie Grafton is on the case.
This was a brilliant read and I loved every minute, though some of the abuse was pretty hard to take.
Many thanks to The Pigeonhole, the author and my fellow Pigeons for making this such an enjoyable read.
The Black House is the extreme. Natasha’s mother Sienna was the first to be recruited by spiritual leader Joseph Carillo, whose teachings were based around the evil of the outside world and the suspicion that surrounded figures of authority like the police and teachers. But the evil inside The Black House made the outside world look like Noddyland. Mothers became the ‘Aunts’ who no longer tied themselves to their own children, who were punished for calling them ‘mummy’. Young children were starved and often beaten. The girls would ‘mature’ into sex partners for Carillo and the older boys and eventually married off while in their teens. What they all endured was horrendous, but the loss of their own mother was one of the hardest.
Following a fire at The Black House in which many of the adults died, Blue, Lisa, Natasha, her brother Brodie and Sienna escaped. Once outside the three girls were separated, supposedly for their own good. Blue meets ageing rock star Isaac, who takes her under his wing. She works for him in his record shop Pop Planet. She is recovering as well as can be expected until she receives an unexpected call. Something has happened to Natasha and Blue has been given custody of her 10-year-old daughter Pen, who she has never met or even knew existed. But something doesn’t add up and soon DI Annie Grafton is on the case.
This was a brilliant read and I loved every minute, though some of the abuse was pretty hard to take.
Many thanks to The Pigeonhole, the author and my fellow Pigeons for making this such an enjoyable read.
April 7, 2021
Anger is the noise that fear makes’
Blue Sillitoe was only 5 years old when her Mother took her to live in The Black House, a cult community run by the seemingly charismatic Joseph Carillo. She was separated from her mother and lived in a dormitory with three other young girls Natasha, Lisa and Amy who became her family. The children were undernourished, cold, mentally and sexually abused and were made to watch horrifying brainwashing videos of the outside world. They were told to call all the women Aunt even their own mothers.
After five years of living in this evil nightmare, with the help of Natasha and Lisa, Blue escapes The Black House and spends the rest of her childhood in the care of social services.
Twenty years later Blue is settled in London and has a job at Planet pop where she works with the owner Isaac who is an ex Rock Star, he was in a band during the 70’s and 80’s, and a great character he is like a father to Blue.
Blue receives a phone call from a firm of solicitors requesting her to make an appointment to see one of the solicitors, Mathew Parsons. She is advised that Natasha Lydia Dryden had died and Blue is mentioned in her Will. Shocked not only that Natasha is dead but that she is a beneficiary in her Will, she attends the reading of the Will with Isaac by her side for support and is surprised to see a police woman DI Annie Grafton and Dee a social worker at the reading.
What follows is a tense and shocking sequence of events but it also leaves the reader totally enthralled.
Thank you Pigeonhole and Niki for the opportunity to read The Girls Inside it is certainly an unforgettable if uncomfortable read.
Blue Sillitoe was only 5 years old when her Mother took her to live in The Black House, a cult community run by the seemingly charismatic Joseph Carillo. She was separated from her mother and lived in a dormitory with three other young girls Natasha, Lisa and Amy who became her family. The children were undernourished, cold, mentally and sexually abused and were made to watch horrifying brainwashing videos of the outside world. They were told to call all the women Aunt even their own mothers.
After five years of living in this evil nightmare, with the help of Natasha and Lisa, Blue escapes The Black House and spends the rest of her childhood in the care of social services.
Twenty years later Blue is settled in London and has a job at Planet pop where she works with the owner Isaac who is an ex Rock Star, he was in a band during the 70’s and 80’s, and a great character he is like a father to Blue.
Blue receives a phone call from a firm of solicitors requesting her to make an appointment to see one of the solicitors, Mathew Parsons. She is advised that Natasha Lydia Dryden had died and Blue is mentioned in her Will. Shocked not only that Natasha is dead but that she is a beneficiary in her Will, she attends the reading of the Will with Isaac by her side for support and is surprised to see a police woman DI Annie Grafton and Dee a social worker at the reading.
What follows is a tense and shocking sequence of events but it also leaves the reader totally enthralled.
Thank you Pigeonhole and Niki for the opportunity to read The Girls Inside it is certainly an unforgettable if uncomfortable read.
April 7, 2021
An intriguing psychological thriller dealing with the aftermath of a sex cult that operated in North Wales. Blue Sillitoe was just five years old when her mother was lured to live in the closed community of the Black House by its charismatic leader, Joseph Carillo. She and other children of the cult were cruelly separated from their mothers who were conditioned to show zero emotion, wear a uniform and be known only as the ‘Aunts’.
Now living in London two decades after fleeing the commune, Blue receives a call that turns her world upside down: former dorm mate and fellow survivor Natasha has taken her own life, giving sole custody of her ten year old daughter Penelope to Blue.
Although she is healing, the past is never far from Blue. Traumatised by her experiences within the confines of the Black House cult, she lives in its shadow on a daily basis. She hasn’t seen Natasha for a number of years and has never met her daughter. What caused Natasha to end her life and why was Blue chosen to become Penelope’s main carer? The stage is set for a revisit to their distressing past...
I read this book via Pigeonhole and found it a compelling and oftentimes disturbing read as myself and fellow pigeons revisited the evil Black House with Blue. I’ve never read a novel centred on the activities of a cult and, to be honest, rarely given cults much thought. However I soon found myself quickly researching them, intrigued to understand how people can be taken in by their leaders and how the leaders can get away with programming individuals and undermining their morals, taking on a god-like status. I’m not sure I will ever understand.
This is a riveting read and one I’d recommend, but there are geographical errors in story and I’m not sure the ending was fully resolved. Perhaps room for a sequel?
Now living in London two decades after fleeing the commune, Blue receives a call that turns her world upside down: former dorm mate and fellow survivor Natasha has taken her own life, giving sole custody of her ten year old daughter Penelope to Blue.
Although she is healing, the past is never far from Blue. Traumatised by her experiences within the confines of the Black House cult, she lives in its shadow on a daily basis. She hasn’t seen Natasha for a number of years and has never met her daughter. What caused Natasha to end her life and why was Blue chosen to become Penelope’s main carer? The stage is set for a revisit to their distressing past...
I read this book via Pigeonhole and found it a compelling and oftentimes disturbing read as myself and fellow pigeons revisited the evil Black House with Blue. I’ve never read a novel centred on the activities of a cult and, to be honest, rarely given cults much thought. However I soon found myself quickly researching them, intrigued to understand how people can be taken in by their leaders and how the leaders can get away with programming individuals and undermining their morals, taking on a god-like status. I’m not sure I will ever understand.
This is a riveting read and one I’d recommend, but there are geographical errors in story and I’m not sure the ending was fully resolved. Perhaps room for a sequel?
May 16, 2021
Thank you to Netgalley and Orion Publishing Group for the arc of The Girls Inside by N.J Mackay!
5 Star read ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐- This follows the aftermath of a sex cult in north Wales! Blue was only 5 when her mum got lured into this by Joseph Carillo.... the children and her were cruelly seperated from their own mothers and then forced to wear a so called uniform, not show any emotion and to be known as Aunts though.... Blue then gets a call in where her former dorm mate as well as survivor has commited suicide and that she now has the responsibility of her child..
A twisting, saddening and heartbreaking but mysterious book, had me on the edge of my seat from start to finish! I loved it and highly recommend to everyone!!
5 Star read ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐- This follows the aftermath of a sex cult in north Wales! Blue was only 5 when her mum got lured into this by Joseph Carillo.... the children and her were cruelly seperated from their own mothers and then forced to wear a so called uniform, not show any emotion and to be known as Aunts though.... Blue then gets a call in where her former dorm mate as well as survivor has commited suicide and that she now has the responsibility of her child..
A twisting, saddening and heartbreaking but mysterious book, had me on the edge of my seat from start to finish! I loved it and highly recommend to everyone!!
April 14, 2021
I really enjoyed this. A chilling story of manipulation by a cult leader and the long term effects on the few who escaped. Years later, one of the girls who made it out alive (Natasha) "dies", leaving custody of her daughter (Pen) to the other girl who was her "sister" during their time in the cult (Blue). We follow the journey into the mystery and learn about all their past. We also meet some other, very interesting characters in Isaac, who helped Blue as she was growing up and Annie, the detective who investigates Natasha's death. I was a little disappointed with the ending as I expected something else but overall, I really liked it.
April 7, 2021
This started off so well and could have been a great book with some harrowing writing around the impact of children brought up in a cult, however there were just so many silly inconsistencies that could have so easily been rectified with a bit of detailed research and editing. Those along with the very lumpy and rushed finish - almost as if the author got bored and couldn’t be bothered with a believable and robust ending - are why I am just giving this book an average 3 stars. It was an ok read but could have been so much better, however I’m still grateful to have been part of the group reading it on Pigeonhole.
April 7, 2021
I read this over 10 days with Pigeonhole and it was totally gripping. At times harrowing, at times sad, at times chilling, with some unexpected twists along the way. I’m not sure about the ending, as it seemed quite rushed and left things very much up in the air. Thanks Pigeon and Niki.
April 30, 2021
I enjoyed Niki Mackay’s last book; Found Her, so was pleased to read this with The Pigeonhole.
Blue Sillitoe grew up in a cult in Wales. She escaped along with a couple of other girls in her dormitory, plus a couple of boys, and one mother of Natasha, who was Blue’s friend.
At the start of this book, we see Natasha posting some letters and setting fire to a shed, in which a dead body is found. It’s assumed to be Natasha, and the care of her daughter, Pen has been bequeathed to Blue. But is all as it seems?
There are some brilliant twists in this plot, along with some lovely relationships. It’s great to see Blue and her care of Pen flourish. The parts about the cult are horrifying and gruesome, but make you think about the impact of such a childhood on these damaged adults.
I found the ending really alarming. I think that there are tiny parts of the plotting which could be tightened up a bit, but I’m always happy to suspend my disbelief for a good thrill, so enjoyed this a lot.
Blue Sillitoe grew up in a cult in Wales. She escaped along with a couple of other girls in her dormitory, plus a couple of boys, and one mother of Natasha, who was Blue’s friend.
At the start of this book, we see Natasha posting some letters and setting fire to a shed, in which a dead body is found. It’s assumed to be Natasha, and the care of her daughter, Pen has been bequeathed to Blue. But is all as it seems?
There are some brilliant twists in this plot, along with some lovely relationships. It’s great to see Blue and her care of Pen flourish. The parts about the cult are horrifying and gruesome, but make you think about the impact of such a childhood on these damaged adults.
I found the ending really alarming. I think that there are tiny parts of the plotting which could be tightened up a bit, but I’m always happy to suspend my disbelief for a good thrill, so enjoyed this a lot.
April 8, 2021
What a read! Frightening, thrilling, chilling and shocking, The Girls Inside is about survivors. Brought up in a cult, cut off from the world, deprived of love and subjected to appalling abuse, Black House survivors Lisa, Natasha, Brodie and Blue go their separate ways, once rescued, and try and live their lives, away from the dark and menacing shadows of the Welsh community, founded by Joseph Carillo.
Not everyone survived and we do get to meet some of those adults and children. The past when it is referred to is compelling to read but horrific in its detail. Necessary to understand what follows and to highlight how surviving isn't just about being rescued, but the chances we have of adjusting to society in as balanced and functional a way as possible.
Blue Sillitoe is our main narrator and she has the support of Planet Pop record store owner and former addict Isaac, as well as Social Care's Dee and DI Angie Grafton when Blue is left an unusual 'gift' out of nowhere, decades later, in the form of Natasha's daughter Pen. Natasha was older than Blue and with Amy and Lisa, the four girls shared a dormitory and the daily humiliations and degradations of living under Carillo's regime. Natasha always took care of everyone so Blue cannot understand why Natasha has suddenly committed suicide.
Blue has deliberately not been in touch with anyone from the Black House days, but when forced to care for Pen, Blue is thrown into a puzzling, terrifying spiral of memories and a desperate attempt to uncover the truth. Can anyone truly survive such a controlling start to life, or is it a foegone conclusion the demons will drive you mad?
Read The Girls Inside to find out where the danger truly lies and whether it is ever possible to escape.
Not everyone survived and we do get to meet some of those adults and children. The past when it is referred to is compelling to read but horrific in its detail. Necessary to understand what follows and to highlight how surviving isn't just about being rescued, but the chances we have of adjusting to society in as balanced and functional a way as possible.
Blue Sillitoe is our main narrator and she has the support of Planet Pop record store owner and former addict Isaac, as well as Social Care's Dee and DI Angie Grafton when Blue is left an unusual 'gift' out of nowhere, decades later, in the form of Natasha's daughter Pen. Natasha was older than Blue and with Amy and Lisa, the four girls shared a dormitory and the daily humiliations and degradations of living under Carillo's regime. Natasha always took care of everyone so Blue cannot understand why Natasha has suddenly committed suicide.
Blue has deliberately not been in touch with anyone from the Black House days, but when forced to care for Pen, Blue is thrown into a puzzling, terrifying spiral of memories and a desperate attempt to uncover the truth. Can anyone truly survive such a controlling start to life, or is it a foegone conclusion the demons will drive you mad?
Read The Girls Inside to find out where the danger truly lies and whether it is ever possible to escape.
April 9, 2021
I read a free copy of this on Pigeonhole website.
This was an interesting, and sometimes dark, read. It follows Blue, a survivor of a cult that her mother took her to as a child. After escaping Blue left her old life behind and tried to make a new one. She gets pulled back in when she is left with custody of the daughter of one of the other survivors, and a mystery starts to reveal itself about what happened on the night the cult fell, and what has been happening to the others since.
It was fast-paced and intriguing - I think cults, and the people who find themselves in them, are a fascinating subject to a lot of people. Add to that a brilliant, strong but damaged, character and some good old twists and wrong turns and you get a engrossing story that is really well written.
This was an interesting, and sometimes dark, read. It follows Blue, a survivor of a cult that her mother took her to as a child. After escaping Blue left her old life behind and tried to make a new one. She gets pulled back in when she is left with custody of the daughter of one of the other survivors, and a mystery starts to reveal itself about what happened on the night the cult fell, and what has been happening to the others since.
It was fast-paced and intriguing - I think cults, and the people who find themselves in them, are a fascinating subject to a lot of people. Add to that a brilliant, strong but damaged, character and some good old twists and wrong turns and you get a engrossing story that is really well written.
April 7, 2021
On the whole this is a good thriller. It was difficult reading some of it as there is abuse. The cult is horrific and what goes on in there.
Blue is quite a mixed up young woman but given the responsibility of looking after a child helps her to keep balance.
The past catches up with her and she tries to deal with it in her own clumsy way and not all with great results.
I liked Isaac who kept Blue on the straight and narrow.
Thanks to Niki and Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read
Blue is quite a mixed up young woman but given the responsibility of looking after a child helps her to keep balance.
The past catches up with her and she tries to deal with it in her own clumsy way and not all with great results.
I liked Isaac who kept Blue on the straight and narrow.
Thanks to Niki and Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read
June 1, 2021
This book was so well written from start to finish. Throughout the book I had no idea what was going to happen and the twists were things I wouldn’t have guessed. My one down side to it is that i feel like it wasn’t finished, I had questions at the end. I’m hoping there will be another book that will follow up on this.
November 23, 2021
The Girls Inside by @nikimackaywriter Is a brilliant 5 star 🌟 read 🌟
Blue grew up in the Black House a cult lead by Joseph Carillo,
He recruited his followers by promising them a better life they believe his delusional views they will do anything for him but it a tragic fire breaks out Blue sees this as her chance to escape the clutches of this evil brainwashed cult she runs as fast as she can and doesn't look back..
20 years later Blues past comes knocking on her door 🚪
As soon as I knew this was a story about cults I knew I was going to love it its such a fascinating topic to read about and this was such a great book i loved the story and the characters it had the chilling air of the Notorious cult leader Jim Jones and he was one scary man, I enjoyed reading about how Blue coped with life after are cult and it was very interesting to she her past come back and how she dealt with that also I suspect she had ptsd.
I loved how the character of Blue was written considering her upbringing her life could have gone another way but was great to see that despite her life in the cult she managed to build a life for herself, this book had plenty of twists I also liked to read about Natasha and pen.. it's written very well the story is told perfectly with likable characters apart from the obvious of course. This is another fantastic book by author NJ Mackay
Blue grew up in the Black House a cult lead by Joseph Carillo,
He recruited his followers by promising them a better life they believe his delusional views they will do anything for him but it a tragic fire breaks out Blue sees this as her chance to escape the clutches of this evil brainwashed cult she runs as fast as she can and doesn't look back..
20 years later Blues past comes knocking on her door 🚪
As soon as I knew this was a story about cults I knew I was going to love it its such a fascinating topic to read about and this was such a great book i loved the story and the characters it had the chilling air of the Notorious cult leader Jim Jones and he was one scary man, I enjoyed reading about how Blue coped with life after are cult and it was very interesting to she her past come back and how she dealt with that also I suspect she had ptsd.
I loved how the character of Blue was written considering her upbringing her life could have gone another way but was great to see that despite her life in the cult she managed to build a life for herself, this book had plenty of twists I also liked to read about Natasha and pen.. it's written very well the story is told perfectly with likable characters apart from the obvious of course. This is another fantastic book by author NJ Mackay
April 7, 2021
I enjoyed reading this but the ending has left me disappointed. I hope there’s a sequel which gives more closure to the book
April 11, 2021
Thank you to the author, publishers Orion Dash and online book club Pigeonhole for access to read this for free. This is an honest and voluntary review.
I loved some of these characters, but the final reveal and ‘bad guy’ let the whole thing down.
Blue Sillietoe grew up in a cult. Her mother fell under the influence of a charismatic leader in northern Wales and moved into Black House with her daughter when Blue was just five years old.
Sexual abuse, starvation and violence were common in the cult and Blue’s only comfort was in the company of the three girls she shared a dorm with, two of whom (Lisa and Natasha) she escaped with one night fleeing a terrible fire at Black House.
Years later Blue has built a life away from the trauma. Living in London, working in a record store with recovering addict and ageing ex-rock star Isaac, and keeping as far away as she can from her past. She hasn’t kept in touch with any of the other survivors, although she knows Lisa committed suicide a few years previously and she does visit Lisa’s grave regularly. So, she is shocked when she’s contacted by a solicitor to say Natasha had also now died and her will names Blue as the guardian of Natasha’s 10-year-old daughter, Penelope.
Natasha’s death and the questions of a reporter looking to write a book about the tragedies which followed the Black House survivors, prompt Blue to begin to ask the questions she has long suppressed about what really happened to her as a child. Will she have to go back to Black House to find the truth?
This book had a lot of early promise. The cult survivor and the sense if hidden secrets from childhood really pulled me in. Blue is a bit spiky, a bit vulnerable and really admirable. Her boss and father figure Isaac is fab, he gives a really good sense of someone who has seen it all, but cares deeply, giving a balance of tough love and selfless support. Penelope’s quiet determination and resilience are adorable and they have the world’s most practical and understanding social work in Dee. It’s great to see such a positive portrayal if a social worker who both cares and is effective rather than the usual overworked and uncaring trope that appears in fictional social workers.
The twists and turns are largely predictable, but still enjoyable. However, there are two big let downs. One is the lack of research. It doesn’t need to be a police procedural, but the single Met Police detective who ends up instructing a Welsh armed police officer to shoot to wound not kill comes across as patronising and ridiculous. The message is clearly that the Met Police can do whatever they like and one single detective is worth more than an entire police force. She’s not even painted as the talented rogue cop who subverts the rules to get the result she knows is morally if not procedurally right. The local force are just an insignificant plotting tool.
Likewise the geography of Wales shrinks to about the size of a large town, with journeys that (according to Welsh Pigeonhole readers) would take the large part of a day, being covered by a short Uber ride. In a part if the storyline where tension should have been building trying to figure out the logic if the geography was an unnecessary distraction.
The second let down is how the character development fails in the second half of the book. Blue goes from the suspicious and cynical survivor who finds it hard to trust, to the most naïve person who falls into bed with a man she hasn’t seen in years and shares every thought she has with another who she follows into the middle of nowhere despite his sudden detailed knowledge about parts of her past she has never shared.
It all just left me feeling disappointed, with the final reveal and ending like a betrayal of Blue’s character and the support networks she had. Such a shame.
I loved some of these characters, but the final reveal and ‘bad guy’ let the whole thing down.
Blue Sillietoe grew up in a cult. Her mother fell under the influence of a charismatic leader in northern Wales and moved into Black House with her daughter when Blue was just five years old.
Sexual abuse, starvation and violence were common in the cult and Blue’s only comfort was in the company of the three girls she shared a dorm with, two of whom (Lisa and Natasha) she escaped with one night fleeing a terrible fire at Black House.
Years later Blue has built a life away from the trauma. Living in London, working in a record store with recovering addict and ageing ex-rock star Isaac, and keeping as far away as she can from her past. She hasn’t kept in touch with any of the other survivors, although she knows Lisa committed suicide a few years previously and she does visit Lisa’s grave regularly. So, she is shocked when she’s contacted by a solicitor to say Natasha had also now died and her will names Blue as the guardian of Natasha’s 10-year-old daughter, Penelope.
Natasha’s death and the questions of a reporter looking to write a book about the tragedies which followed the Black House survivors, prompt Blue to begin to ask the questions she has long suppressed about what really happened to her as a child. Will she have to go back to Black House to find the truth?
This book had a lot of early promise. The cult survivor and the sense if hidden secrets from childhood really pulled me in. Blue is a bit spiky, a bit vulnerable and really admirable. Her boss and father figure Isaac is fab, he gives a really good sense of someone who has seen it all, but cares deeply, giving a balance of tough love and selfless support. Penelope’s quiet determination and resilience are adorable and they have the world’s most practical and understanding social work in Dee. It’s great to see such a positive portrayal if a social worker who both cares and is effective rather than the usual overworked and uncaring trope that appears in fictional social workers.
The twists and turns are largely predictable, but still enjoyable. However, there are two big let downs. One is the lack of research. It doesn’t need to be a police procedural, but the single Met Police detective who ends up instructing a Welsh armed police officer to shoot to wound not kill comes across as patronising and ridiculous. The message is clearly that the Met Police can do whatever they like and one single detective is worth more than an entire police force. She’s not even painted as the talented rogue cop who subverts the rules to get the result she knows is morally if not procedurally right. The local force are just an insignificant plotting tool.
Likewise the geography of Wales shrinks to about the size of a large town, with journeys that (according to Welsh Pigeonhole readers) would take the large part of a day, being covered by a short Uber ride. In a part if the storyline where tension should have been building trying to figure out the logic if the geography was an unnecessary distraction.
The second let down is how the character development fails in the second half of the book. Blue goes from the suspicious and cynical survivor who finds it hard to trust, to the most naïve person who falls into bed with a man she hasn’t seen in years and shares every thought she has with another who she follows into the middle of nowhere despite his sudden detailed knowledge about parts of her past she has never shared.
It all just left me feeling disappointed, with the final reveal and ending like a betrayal of Blue’s character and the support networks she had. Such a shame.
April 9, 2021
This was a deeply disturbing read, focussed on a cult and the aftermath of the cult on the lives of those that lived there. Blue Sillitoe lived at the cult, the Black House, after she was taken there by her mother who had been enticed by Joseph Carillo, the enigmatic cult leader. Carillo had lured many women and their children to the cult which he ruled over with strict and crazy rules. Some of the children he had fathered himself. The cult used women as sexual objects and also their daughters once they were deemed old enough.
After a huge fire, some escaped when most burnt to death after having been drugged into submission. Blue’s mother died, and she was left to the care of social services. When Blue was old enough she went to London and erased the people from her previous life. She met an unlikely friend named Isaac, who actually saved her by becoming her rock. He had been a rock star in his youth and he was a wonderful character in the book. When something happens to Blue’s friend, Natasha, her ten year old daughter comes to live with Blue, leading Blue’s life to move in an unexpected direction.
However, not everything is as it seems. DI Annie Grafton believes that there is more to Natasha’s disappearance than is first thought. She sticks closely to Blue and becomes a positive influence on her as she tries to parent Pen, Natasha’s daughter.
The book is full of twists and turns and the sections that deal with the sexual abuse that took place at the cult are very difficult to read. This is not a book for the faint hearted, but it is an excellent read. It was great to see social workers and the police painted in such a positive light, as that isn’t always the case. It is interesting, full of intrigue, and the story pulls you in right from the beginning. I thoroughly enjoyed it.
After a huge fire, some escaped when most burnt to death after having been drugged into submission. Blue’s mother died, and she was left to the care of social services. When Blue was old enough she went to London and erased the people from her previous life. She met an unlikely friend named Isaac, who actually saved her by becoming her rock. He had been a rock star in his youth and he was a wonderful character in the book. When something happens to Blue’s friend, Natasha, her ten year old daughter comes to live with Blue, leading Blue’s life to move in an unexpected direction.
However, not everything is as it seems. DI Annie Grafton believes that there is more to Natasha’s disappearance than is first thought. She sticks closely to Blue and becomes a positive influence on her as she tries to parent Pen, Natasha’s daughter.
The book is full of twists and turns and the sections that deal with the sexual abuse that took place at the cult are very difficult to read. This is not a book for the faint hearted, but it is an excellent read. It was great to see social workers and the police painted in such a positive light, as that isn’t always the case. It is interesting, full of intrigue, and the story pulls you in right from the beginning. I thoroughly enjoyed it.
July 5, 2022
This was a bit of a mixed bag. Its started incredibly well and some of the threads were really good. However the lack of research into basics such as geography, police procedure etc. were disappointing and really let the book down as it was so jarringly wrong. I felt it became quite predictable and although I’m glad that the ending wasn’t the cliché I’d started to expect, it did feel rather rushed and a bit flat. There were aspects of the narrative which I feel could have been more effective, especially if we were to get the revelations around one character at the same time as the main protagonist. Overall, I think this book would have been improved by some more detailed planning around when revelations occur within the story arc, and some research in various aspects (cooking pasta, the basic geography of the location that you set your book in) and maybe a better editor who should realistically have picked up a lot of these issues before the book went to publication. However, this was a good premise, with some strong writing and I’d read more by this author as this book definitely showed promise.
April 8, 2021
Blue Sillitoe discovers she has been asked to looked after the young daughter of someone she grew up with in disturbing circumstances, and this brings back unwelcome memories.
This is an enjoyable, if a little unsettling, psychological thriller. There are plenty of twists and turns to keep the reader entertained. It’s an exciting read, quite the page turner, with some interesting characters. I particularly like Isaac, Blue’s platonic knight in shining armour. He seems a great guy, a hero you could say. I don’t know what would’ve become of Blue if he hadn’t come along with his ‘’Planet Rock’’ music shop and his words of wisdom. Some of the story’s content is somewhat harrowing as it deals with life within a cult so watch out for that! The ending is quite a sinister and ambiguous one and, therefore, won’t suit everyone. I liked it, though, and thought it it was a fitting conclusion to a dark and gripping tale.
This is an enjoyable, if a little unsettling, psychological thriller. There are plenty of twists and turns to keep the reader entertained. It’s an exciting read, quite the page turner, with some interesting characters. I particularly like Isaac, Blue’s platonic knight in shining armour. He seems a great guy, a hero you could say. I don’t know what would’ve become of Blue if he hadn’t come along with his ‘’Planet Rock’’ music shop and his words of wisdom. Some of the story’s content is somewhat harrowing as it deals with life within a cult so watch out for that! The ending is quite a sinister and ambiguous one and, therefore, won’t suit everyone. I liked it, though, and thought it it was a fitting conclusion to a dark and gripping tale.
March 2, 2021
A good read, sinister and mysterious and held my interest well.
The story centres around a commune from the past that was influenced by evil and ruined / cost many lives. The children who escaped the commune are now grown up, albeit with physical and mental scars.
One such survivor is Blue who suddenly is told one of the others has taken her own life and had pre organised for Blue to take custody of her ten year old daughter.
As we progress through the book we find out more about the past which gives us some clues about the present and all is not all that it seems.
I guessed the twists but this did not detract from the overall experience and I felt the author built up an excellent, atmospheric and dark setting which made a compelling tale. I wanted to untangle and discover the secrets held within and that was the path we were, skilfully, led along.
The story centres around a commune from the past that was influenced by evil and ruined / cost many lives. The children who escaped the commune are now grown up, albeit with physical and mental scars.
One such survivor is Blue who suddenly is told one of the others has taken her own life and had pre organised for Blue to take custody of her ten year old daughter.
As we progress through the book we find out more about the past which gives us some clues about the present and all is not all that it seems.
I guessed the twists but this did not detract from the overall experience and I felt the author built up an excellent, atmospheric and dark setting which made a compelling tale. I wanted to untangle and discover the secrets held within and that was the path we were, skilfully, led along.
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March 30, 2021Blue grew up in The Black House...
I have an obsession with cults and true crime, so it’s no surprise that this book, for me, hit the sweet spot!
I have a annoying habit, usually just after the half way point, where I take stock. What have a I learnt? What’s changed since the beginning of the story? So many books these days have multiple twists and turns to the point where they lose authenticity. #TheGirlsInside is a perfect example of a book that doesn’t use crazy rollercoaster twists and convoluted storylines and yet still keeps you enthralled.
I think maybe we could have seen more of Natasha, and why she made the decisions she made. Though I loved Blue as a protagonist, Natasha was definitely somewhat of an enigma, and that’s the real reason I think I loved this book so much!
April 22, 2021
This is the story of survivors from a cult that existed several years ago, one in particular named Blue. The descriptions of life and their lives within the cult were shockingly enthralling, and it was good to hear of survivors from this fictional cult. All is not as it seems though and despite Blue trying to maintain complete distance from anyone else originally within that cult, she finds herself being caught up in a journalist's research into what went on.
It seemed to me that geographical details may have been a bit incorrect (but maybe that was me, misunderstanding the finer details?) and there wasn't a big reveal at any time which for me was a bit disappointing, so whereas this could have been a 5* book, I think for me it rates more as a 3 and a half star book.
However, thanks to Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read this book, and to Niki Mackay the author.
It seemed to me that geographical details may have been a bit incorrect (but maybe that was me, misunderstanding the finer details?) and there wasn't a big reveal at any time which for me was a bit disappointing, so whereas this could have been a 5* book, I think for me it rates more as a 3 and a half star book.
However, thanks to Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read this book, and to Niki Mackay the author.
June 16, 2021
Solid 3.5 stars.
*Thank you to Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read in exchange for an honest review*
I had only read short stories by N Mackay so was excited to read my first full novel by her.
Blue spent her early childhood in a cult after her mother was lured to join by the charismatic leader. She forms close bonds with her dorm mates as they witness the abuse the adults inflict on anyone who doesn’t follow the rules. An unexpected fire at the main house, gives some of the cult members the chance to escape to freedom. Blue deliberately distances herself from the fellow survivors and tries to forge a new life. 20 years later she receives a phone call informing her that one of her old dorm mates has died in an apparent suicide. This forces Blue to drag up her past and then start to question the circumstances around the suicide.
The book alternates between Blue remembering her past in the cult and the present day with some chapters narrated by other characters.
This was an interesting read but a slow burner. There isn’t much action in the present day at first and I found I preferred the chapters about the past. This is the second novel I have read recently that has involved cults and Its not something I had particularly thought about before. The author does a great job at describing the events but also the people. There are some really likable characters in this book and I was genuinely rooting for Blue.
I didnt see some of the twists coming and on the whole i did enjoy it. I will definitely look at reading more of Nikis books.
*Thank you to Pigeonhole for the opportunity to read in exchange for an honest review*
I had only read short stories by N Mackay so was excited to read my first full novel by her.
Blue spent her early childhood in a cult after her mother was lured to join by the charismatic leader. She forms close bonds with her dorm mates as they witness the abuse the adults inflict on anyone who doesn’t follow the rules. An unexpected fire at the main house, gives some of the cult members the chance to escape to freedom. Blue deliberately distances herself from the fellow survivors and tries to forge a new life. 20 years later she receives a phone call informing her that one of her old dorm mates has died in an apparent suicide. This forces Blue to drag up her past and then start to question the circumstances around the suicide.
The book alternates between Blue remembering her past in the cult and the present day with some chapters narrated by other characters.
This was an interesting read but a slow burner. There isn’t much action in the present day at first and I found I preferred the chapters about the past. This is the second novel I have read recently that has involved cults and Its not something I had particularly thought about before. The author does a great job at describing the events but also the people. There are some really likable characters in this book and I was genuinely rooting for Blue.
I didnt see some of the twists coming and on the whole i did enjoy it. I will definitely look at reading more of Nikis books.
September 1, 2025
I thought this was a really good book. The chapters on Natasha give hints as to what really happened in the past and what is happening in the present, so I figured out a lot of the secrets before Blue did, but that did not detract from my enjoyment of the story.
I thought Mackay’s character building was very strong. We have a terrific sense of who Blue is, who Natasha is, also Isaac, Annie, Dee, Pen, and to a somewhat lesser extent, Brody. I liked how Mackay had Serena reveal truths about the past and about Blue’s mother. Great characterizations.
Narration: 3 weak stars. Emma-Jane Goodwin mispronounced several words AND..she had an Australian accent. Australian?? The story takes place primarily in London, and Blue makes reference to having worked hard to erase a Welsh accent, so where in the heck does an Australian accent come in?
I thought Mackay’s character building was very strong. We have a terrific sense of who Blue is, who Natasha is, also Isaac, Annie, Dee, Pen, and to a somewhat lesser extent, Brody. I liked how Mackay had Serena reveal truths about the past and about Blue’s mother. Great characterizations.
Narration: 3 weak stars. Emma-Jane Goodwin mispronounced several words AND..she had an Australian accent. Australian?? The story takes place primarily in London, and Blue makes reference to having worked hard to erase a Welsh accent, so where in the heck does an Australian accent come in?
April 7, 2021
A gripping thriller about the after effects of children who are part of a cult. Blue managed to escape the cult in North Wales, along with the other girls Natasha and Lisa and Natasha's brother Brodie and mother, Sienna. Her own mother unfortunately died in the fire that happened at the time.
She has rebuilt her life to a certain extent but is still deeply affected by the traumas. She is told that Natasha has committed suicide and left her as the sole carer of her daughter, Pen. Can Blue step up to what is expected of her? Someone else is also wanting to know what happened in the cult - will this bring back too many bad memories?
A very good read and keeps you engaged throughout.
She has rebuilt her life to a certain extent but is still deeply affected by the traumas. She is told that Natasha has committed suicide and left her as the sole carer of her daughter, Pen. Can Blue step up to what is expected of her? Someone else is also wanting to know what happened in the cult - will this bring back too many bad memories?
A very good read and keeps you engaged throughout.
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