Disorder

by Amy Crider

Amy Crider's debut psychological thriller is an endlessly satisfying page turner that will forever change the way you look at storytelling and mental illness. Graduate student Wendy Zemansky was hoping for a normal semester at an isolated university in upstate New York. Since coming off disability and starting medication for bipolar disorder, Wendy longs to feel like a real functioning adult, a respected colleague in her writing program. But when her roommate goes missing, Wendy plunges into an investigation that is roadblocked by vainglorious professors, specious doctors, and dubious friends. As time runs out, Wendy is forced to separate shades of suspicion amidst a swirling and uncontrollable mania, leaving her with startling lessons on what it means to persevere when everyone is seemingly against you.

Genres: Thriller, Audiobook

220 pages, Paperback

Published November 9, 2021

Reviews

[Vaishnavi · Rating 1 out of 5]

I don't even know how I read the book till 50%. The book was meant to be a psychological thriller, but reading this book, I felt psychologically stressed.
There was no proper narration, there was a dump of information, needed or not I don't know. This book was meant to be a thriller, but I felt nothing of such.
I couldn't even bare to complete reading this book,
DNFed

[franzi · Rating 3 out of 5]

Rating: 3 stars.

I was very excited to read this book because the description sounded right up my alley, and it did have a lot of elements I enjoyed, however, I still was a little disappointed.

The narration was really interesting, it was pretty unique and not like anything I've read before. That was the main reason the book intrigued me in the first place, and it definitely lived up to my expectations in that regard. The main character's narration was really confusing, and yet I really enjoyed her way of storytelling. Her emotions were very vivid and you could really feel the confusion that she felt during the novel. Her character's journey throughout the book was really fun to follow and especially during the end I was really invested in her story.

Nevertheless, the book had a lot of weaknesses. The plot itself was pretty weak in my opinion, the story was slow and not really suspenseful, and a lot of scenes were disjointed from the main narrative and didn't add anything in the end. The mystery itself wasn't properly fleshed out and it was easy to figure out where the story would lead.

I also didn't love the writing style. The protagonist's thoughts and emotions were written very well, but the writing was lacking when it came to dialogues and descriptions, which was why overall it wasn't my favorite.

Overall this was a bit hit and miss for me, but I still think it's a very unique book and definitely worth a read.

[Saylor Rains · Rating 3 out of 5]

When the first thing a narrator does is try to convince you of their reliability, you know it’s going to be a mental rollercoaster.

The last time Wendy saw her roommate Diana was at a party among her professors, except no one else saw her there. She begins trying to uncover where Diana could have gone or what could have happened to her, but it’s a lot more difficult when she’s being hindered by everyone around her— and being on medication for bipolar disorder that everyone knows about then going through mania and everyone thinking you’re delusional doesn’t help.

Wendy starts off trying to convince you that she is no more unreliable than anyone else you know, but it seems like everyone in her life from professors, doctors, and friends are suggesting otherwise.

This was definitely more of a “slow ride,” as in it didn’t have that edge-of-your-seat thrill, it wasn’t necessarily an urgent page turner, but it did have an interesting premise and I did definitely want to find out whether everyone else was right and Wendy was having a breakdown or if Wendy would uncover what really happened after the last time she saw Diana. Definitely not action-packed or heavy on the crime itself. While it was more of a silent thriller, I did enjoy the premise and found myself getting frustrated on behalf of Wendy when people who should be trying to help her were seemingly looking down on her or just working against her.

I look forward to seeing more from Amy Crider further into her writing career, because I think it’ll only get better from here on out.

Thank you to University of New Orleans Press, Amy Crider, and Netgalley for the ARC of this book.

[Patricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good telling of mania from the inside.

[Paul · Rating 5 out of 5]

Know the writer and critiqued an early draft, so of course I think it's brilliant. But even if I didn't know Amy personally, I'd love her critique of Freudian psychology, which has probably ruined more family relationships than financial disputes and substance abuse combined. Hmm, maybe that's why we're friends.

[Laura Veitch · Rating 3 out of 5]

The value is in the experience of mental illness.

[AndiReads · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wendy is a Graduate student at a small university in New York state. She is fragile and hesitant to engage with her professors and colleagues after ending disability support for several years. It seems like Wendy is hitting her stride and planning to graduate at the end of the year when unfortunately, her roommate disappears and Wendy finds herself tangled in a complex web of stories and potential delusions as she tries to find out what happened to her roommate Diana.

I loved the writing. The author captured bipolar disorder in my opinion - I have a good friend who has similar highs/lows and I recognized her thinking in the writing. The author also made the missing roommate very real in my mind, even though Wendy, it turns out, was not that close with her. Additionally, Amy Crider also uses a cool trick where the heroine (Wendy) imagines what certain conversations would be like between other characters. Thus she provides other viewpoints but they are not necessarily reliable.

I think the author did a great job of dramatizing Wendy’s disorder and her quest to be a “real adult.” I enjoyed the red herrings and the complex characters as I tried to determine what really happened to Diana. I would recommend this novel to anyone interested in a slow burn thriller or a bipolar narrative (or both!). I look forward to more books from Amy Crider!

[Marssie Mencotti · Rating 5 out of 5]

I though this book was brilliant and a must-read because it is a perfect blending of mystery and mind. The most complex and wonderful experience is that our protagonist, our hero, our armchair detective is a person with a "mental" illness. In this case, bi-polar disorder. We can see what motivates her, why she makes certain decisions, what her brilliance with and without the manifestations of this disorder can lead her to discover. Her housemate is missing. Should she report it, which professors are honest, which are not, which therapists are prescribing the right things, what are the right questions to answer, it's all a jumble that she sorts through with patience and honesty. And let's not forget the opinions of those around her that she is mad, crazy and all other sorts of damaging pejoratives. The most refreshing turn on a mystery novel that I've seen in years.

[Kelly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Though slow and confusing for much of the story, I enjoyed the big finish to wrap up this psychological-ish thriller. An unreliable narrator is tricky to trust, but it made the story so realistic that sometimes I had to stop to ground myself in reality. Opened my eyes to the experience of mania.