If you eat while lying down, you will turn into a snake…… If you don’t polish off all the rice on your plate you will marry a man full of pimples and pockmarks.
Come join me as we enter a world where clipping nails at night was strictly forbidden, pointing at the moon would result in one’s ears getting chopped off, and children were forced to stay indoors during sundown for fear of collision with evil forces. Inside this semi-biographical fiction through Swee Lian’s eyes not only will you find a world of laughter and happiness but also one filled with the comedies and tragedies of life. Her colorful family, with their unique identity, customs, and culture, consists of her deeply religious aunts who believe in magic potions, evil charms, and temple mediums and an uncle who insists that guests entering through the front door must depart the same way lest his daughter ends up a spinster. Superstitious old wives' tales, supernatural events, and taboos. Stories from a world where mental disorders and illnesses were believed to be caused by malevolent spirits, talismans, mediums, and fortune tellers were a part of everyday life.
Kopi Soh is the pseudonym of a US based Malaysian author and illustrator best known for her book Oh, I Thought I Was The Only One. She founded the Facebook community 'Stick It To Me', currently renamed 'Kopi Soh's Positive Healing Doodles', an initiative centered around producing "healing art" for the terminally sick and needy, and organizes a group of volunteers to produce art for hospitals and charities. Her work with 'Stick It To Me' was recognized in the Digi WWWOW Awards 2015, winning an award in the Social Gathering category. She also served as the official illustrator for TEDxWeldQuay2013. Kopi Soh was also a former manager with a women's center, training social workers and counselors. She counsels victims in Domestic Violence situations and children who have been sexually assaulted. Being a crisis counselor she was also a Sexual Assault Team Responder for the County and in her spare time, she teaches social media at a community school for the elderly. Her area of specialty is in working with children, adolescents, couples, seniors, refugees, rape victims, abused kids, victims of domestic violence, and families. Kopi Soh's first book, Oh, I Thought I Was The Only One, published by Dawning Victory Consultancy in 2012, distributed by MPH, is a self-help book oriented towards creating awareness of common psychological issues, which manifest in daily life. In 2013, Kopi Soh published her second book, Oh . . . I Thought I Was the Only One 2, a sequel focusing on how children experience various stresses in their daily lives and teaching them skills on how to overcome them. Kopi Soh has been accepted into a doctoral program for the year 2020. Her proposed research will be about Flourishing, Happiness, and Older Malaysian Women.
Thank you to Kopi Soh and Penguin SEA for providing me with a digital copy to provide and honest review for a book tour.
Although I've always been interested in Asian cultures, this was my first foray into getting a glimpse of Malaysian culture. Some elements felt familiar from what I know of Chinese culture, others were wholly knew to me which made this a fascinating read - even more so thanks to the cultural diversity. Told as a semi biography, it reads very much like a family chronicle which not only gives you glimpses into the different cultures but also the different generations within the large family household.
Looking After the Ashes was somewhat reminiscent of Ghibli's Only Yesterday - in fact, some of the tones and themes would generally translate into Ghibli movie. We don't have a clear narrative thread in which we are told a consecutive story chronologically, instead, each chapter tells of a different event in our narrator Swee Lian's life. While somewhat chronologically told, it does at times jump to different times as we are told background stories of other family members. Yet it still gives us a sense of following Swee Lian through her childhood to her teenage years.
The chapters are often backed with a particular supernatural event, whether it's Swee Lian's relatives telling her cautionary tales of guidelines which may or may not be put down as superstition. It was fascinating to read about all the different customs and all the does and don'ts when it comes to dealing with ghosts or other supernatural beings. Although this his told in a biographical way, I appreciated that it was often left open to interpretation - are these superstitions, or was there truly a spirit - evil or otherwise - lurking about?
Although this is focused on Malaysian culture, Kopi Soh also extends her reach and includes a few Thai and mainland China elements to the narrative, adding to the cultural richness. For someone who is more familiar with mainland Chinese culture, it was interesting to see these elements in a different light as well as getting a short glimpse of Thailand - I think the Thai doll story might have been the most eerie to me!
I do believe that the domestic life and family chronicle element was more in focus than the ghost stories I had been expecting. This makes it no less of an interesting read, but perhaps wasn't quite what I was expecting. I can see how this can be a nice and nostalgic read for those who grew up in Malaysia - as someone who isn't familiar with the culture, this was a very interesting read and definitely a great book to pick up for people who want to learn more about the culture. I don't usually pay attention to trigger warnings, but I confess that I felt like there was need for one in this book. Being marketed as young adult and generally having a light slice of life tone, the supernatural and all considered, I was a little caught off guard .
Keeping in mind that this reads more like a family biography as opposed to a story with super natural events, it is definitely a book I would recommend to those who crave a culturally rich book and would like to take a dive into Malaysian lore, family and social dynamics. What also deserves a mention are the illustrations throughout - I believe more books should have illustrations and the ones provided here are plentiful and fun to look at. ["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>
I was provided a digital copy of this book by the author in exchange for an honest review.
Both an excellent primer on Southeast Asian superstitions and a humorous—and sometimes emotional—glimpse of domestic life in Malaysia, this repository of the author's semi-fictionalized recollections of their childhood is bound to put a smile on readers' faces, both those who relate to these experiences and those who find them bizarre. The stream-of-consciousness writing style renders this book honest and sincere, and the overall message of adherence to superstition and avoidance of taboos as expressions of familial love is one that will resonte with many readers but particularly strike a chord on Southeast Asian hearts.
A part of me think that this book is based on a real life experience, but another part isn’t since its listed under fiction. I did not know that it is indeed a semi-biographical fiction until I finished the book and finally read the synopsis on the back. I usually does that (not reading synopsis) because I do not want to have certain expectations towards some books.
This book is basically about a Penang Peranakan family’s story leads by Swee Lian, the main character. Her family, especially the women have so many kinds of superstition and are following them religiously. So Swee Lian and other young kids in their big family often gets lessons about the do’s and don’ts about many things. Like you cannot point to the moon lest your ear would be chopped off, all mirrors are to be covered when a family member just died so that their soul won’t turned into a ghost if they saw their reflections on the mirror.
Throughout reading this book, I can summed up that some of the superstitions does exists in my family. Ours is more like do not sing in the kitchen if you don’t want to marry a much older guy, do not eat meat/veges without rice because your husband will only be playing with your heart and “eat outside” (have an affair), not to play hide and seek during the night unless you want to be forever hidden by the devil 😂 Though its hard to hear these “pantang larang” anymore, its fun to use some of them to frighten my sisters 🤣
In conclusion, this book is a trip down to memory lanes, back to where both of my grandparents are still alive and gave me a lot of scolding when I did something wrong and gave me daily wisdoms and tips of how to do stuff a certain ways.
Looking After The Ashes by Kopi Soh is a semi-biographical book about folklore, superstitions and stories that the author grew up hearing about. This is a very interesting and entertaining read, filled with nonsensical tales and made it possible for me to go deeper into a different culture than my own.
There are a lot of stories that were both familiar and unfamiliar to me. And even if it was familiar, I would have only heard about it on the surface. But this book unraveled even further in great detail and I was totally captivated by it. It was spooky, odd and really intriguing.
Also, to the cover illustration and whoever else decides on the final cover, is the lizard/gecko necessary? Not only that, inside the book has an illustration of another lizard/gecko too and I am filing a complaint. Hahaha kidding okay? I really hate lizards so much and I don't think it should be on a book.
I don't think I have a favourite chapter because it was all equally good and this was totally different than any other book I've read before. I don't think I would have picked it up so I'd have to thank the Times Reads team for sending this book my way. If this is the kind of book that you would enjoy, I'd recommend it to you.
This book is a semi-biographical book written based on the author's childhood and her shared experiences on old wives' tales, superstitions and folklore beliefs in her family culture.
Swee Lian and her family are living in Penang as Peranakan heritage and old women are strongly believe in superstitious events and religious rules to follow. The kind of belief where if you eat while lying down you will turn into a snake, if you don’t finish off the rice on your plate then you will marry a man full of pimples.
Growing up as a Chinese, when reading this book I feel somewhat relatable where some of the superstitious were told by my mom and aunts. I also find out some beliefs that can be really scary as I read along.
Apart from that, there's chapters that pretty sad and heartbreaking. Overall the story is well written and it's an enjoyable read. It's nice to pick this up when you are falling into reading slump.
Thank you Times Reads for sending me a copy in exchange for honest review.
Brings back all the sweet memories as a Malaysian Chinese child. ❤️ Love how the author did not explain every single jargon written in the Malaysian slang. Such a style keeps the book distinct and 'flavorful'.
A very interesting semi biography about superstition and old wife myths. I was so intrigued when I first saw this at the bookstore because many of the superstition were so relatable! Things like not clipping your nails when the sun is down and not pointing at the moon were things I was told growing up too!
Looking after the ashes is written based on the author's memories of her childhood with the various myths and tales weaved into various chapters of her life. It was creepy, intriguing, and funny all packed into 200+ pages. I'd recommend this to everyone who wants to have some brief understanding of Asian culture.
Describing the book as "Amazing" would be an understatement. Reading such rich, vivid yet personal depictions of the South East Asian culture made me EXCITED, CONNECTED and for some reason I felt really GRATEFUL for her work. I have first hand experience with some of the superstitions and they all felt so real. It couldn't be more well written than this. I am so glad that the stories I've heard and experienced are now immortalized in a book.
This creepy tales of Asian paranormal incidents came out just in time for the Hungry Ghost festival! Are you bored of the stereotypical horror stories with predictable payoffs? The book, Looking After Ashes, by Kopi Soh is bound to give you the genuine goosebumps you are looking for, while opening your eyes to a supernatural culture from another part of the world. Good reads and made my 7th (ghost) month of this year, super tantalizing! Love this and can't wait for more from Kopi Soh!
Really enjoyable read. Interesting to read about a different culture. It made me laugh and made me cry and it made me remember my own childhood and the stories of my grandmother
Looking After the Ashes by Kopi Soh Published by Penguin Random House Goodread's Rating: 4.22/5 My Rating: 4/5
"I think in everyone's life, there is that one person you wished you had been nicer to, that 'someone' who adores you no matter how mean you were to them, that 'someone' who is quick to forgive your mistakes, that 'someone' whom you had betrayed, that 'someone' you wished you had taken the time to get to know. For me, Ah Hoon Cheh was that person."
This biographical fiction is a masterfully wrought tapestry of human experience, skillfully interlacing the threads of personal loss, cultural identity, and the resilient human spirit. Set against a vividly depicted cultural landscape, the novel invites readers into a deeply immersive journey through the protagonist's encounters with both personal and collective trauma, in their quest for healing and reconciliation.
Author's prose is exquisitely nuanced, capturing the delicate interplay of emotion and heritage with an artistry that is both poignant and profound. The characters are exquisitely rendered, each imbued with a palpable depth that transcends the page, embodying the universal struggles and hopes that resonate with readers on a deeply personal level.
The narrative structure is a testament to her literary craftsmanship, deftly intertwining individual narratives with broader historical contexts. This synthesis not only enriches the storytelling but also provides a layered understanding of the protagonist's experiences, offering a panoramic view of the human condition. Vivid descriptions and meticulously crafted dialogue further elevate the narrative, ensuring an engaging and thought-provoking reading experience.
While the pacing may exhibit occasional variances, these moments serve to enhance the contemplative nature of the work, allowing readers to fully absorb and reflect upon the rich thematic content. The overall coherence and impact of the novel remain undiminished, leaving a lasting and profound impression.
It stands as a remarkable contribution to contemporary literature, offering a deeply reflective exploration of themes that are both timeless and acutely relevant. Her ability to seamlessly weave together the personal and the universal renders this novel an essential and enlightening read.
"Sometimes, before the umbilical cord was cut, a child was given a temporary or decoy name in order to mislead the spirit of disease and illness. I've heard that some parents even go as far as calling their babies Ah Too, Ah Kau, Ah Goo, which means pig, dog or cow, in order to fool the Grim Reaper into believing that their babies are not human but rather piglets, puppies or calves - something not worthy of stealing away."
I don't usually write reviews but this is such an underrated book and was such a great read, I devoured the whole book in one sitting. Was an amazing book that let me learn so many superstitions I didn't know about addition to the ones I've been told all my life. Super captivating and drew me in with each page. Growing up in South East Asia, I related with the character so so well as I find myself still doing things in my everyday life in hopes these superstitions don't come true. It really was so enjoyable, I'm still constantly coming back to and rereading the sections I enjoyed the most. Absolutely lovely book full of nostalgia, insight to different cultures, and adorably illustrated art!
If you're looking a book that has a blend of horror, humor and good storytelling then this is the book for you.
'Looking After The Ashes' written by Malaysian author, Kopi Soh is definitely what we need! It's about superstition, old wives tales and of course...the supernatural. It also features amazing illustrations by Kulit Baru.
The characters are well written and relatable. I'm not going to give you any spoilers, you just need to get a copy for yourself and just enjoy the ride!
So what happens if you point at the moon or clip your nails at night? Go ahead...get a copy and find out.
Huge thank you to Kopi Soh and Penguin Random House SEA for sending me an e-copy in exchange for an honest review!
Some of my fondest memories growing up were drinking a cup of hot Milo on a rainy day, and savouring how the warmth of the beverage was like a comforting hug, a mood booster amidst the gloom. Reading this book felt like that – it was a ray of sunshine in a particularly hectic week!
Note the following trigger warnings: sexual assault, rape, animal death, gory details.
This semi-biography tells the story of a young Peranakan girl named Swee Lian and the events that occurred as she was growing up. It’s filled with folklore and tales that I’m familiar with, despite not being Peranakan myself – that’s the beauty of being Malaysian, we all have common experiences. Looking After The Ashes embodied that experience in a unique blend of horror, humour, and nostalgia with an insightful explanation of what it means to be Peranakan. As the Peranakans are an underrepresented community in Malaysia, I truly loved reading a book from a perspective of one.
Though a short read, it really packs a punch. I went from smiling to laughing to being heartbroken to smiling again. Kopi Soh’s storytelling skills are nothing short of spectacular. Her vivid descriptions are succinct, straight to the point, and so emotive that they tugged on my heartstrings. It felt very much like listening to a story narrated by a dear friend, in that same comforting and congenial atmosphere. As I read, I could hear the accents of the older women as they spoke, smell the food they cooked, feel the same emotions as Swee Lian whenever they told her to do something and justified it with an old wives’ tale. Once I started reading, it was impossible to put down.
As I had expected to read a fun story about folklore and old wives' tales, I was surprised to encounter some heavier issues. I hadn't expected to read about the hardships of the Japanese occupation, colourism, and the gender bias in Malaysian households among other things. I appreciate that Kopi Soh touched on them as they are a core element of the Malaysian experience, and her ability to weave them in so seamlessly is something I commend.
I must acknowledge my favourite part, which is the supernatural element. As a child, listening to stories of ghosts and spirits was something that fascinated me immensely, something that has not changed in adulthood, and reading about those stories in this book sent me over the moon. I’ve been craving representation in terms of Malaysian folklore, since we are a very folklore-rich country, and this book both sated it and whetted my appetite for more.
All in all, I have nothing but praise for this book that I now hold very close to my heart. Kopi Soh’s lyrical yet simple writing style is perfect for those who are looking for a book that tells them a story instead of bogging them down with heavy writing. Definitely a book I would recommend!
Truly LOVE the book! It's a great way to preserve tradition and to keep it going for the new generation. The book actually made me think of all the childhood tales and taboos I grew up with. Those were fun times and kids these days don't really know or don't really care about those grandmother tales and superstition. It's really sad. I'm happy to see such an effort of preserving tradition. I hope there are more books like this.
This book gave me comfort and entertainment like a bedtime story would.
Looking After the Ashes by Kopi Soh is a semi-biographical fiction of her growing up in a large Peranakan family rooted in Malaysia. She comes from a subculture, the people known as Baba-Nyonyas, who are now slowly fading. The book came across as an authentic and detailed recollection, a heartfelt memoir. It vividly and animatedly shared a moving account that may seem novel to the modern generation.
True to its cover, there are plenty of references to the supernatural - of ghosts, spirits, and seemingly inexplicable events that were so scary they gave me the chills and a nightmare (spook alert: possession of evil spirits). The fright is balanced with fun and exciting anecdotes that amuse and amaze in ways a great film does.
Then, there are those moments that made me stop and think. Beyond the much-needed entertainment value, the book brims with heart and soul. It speaks volumes about the impact of customs and traditions on a person from birth to adulthood; to a family that religiously upholds them; and to a community that relate based on these informal but deeply ingrained rules. It also tackled social themes that have been eye-openers and are vastly different in practice today.
From the first page, every experience no matter how unfamiliar to me, felt believable and realistic. I went through different emotions vicariously living the life of Swee Lian. How must it feel to turn out a girl in a family expecting a boy? What was it like to have numerous elders all playing a part in raising you? How do you relate with people who are family only on paper? How must you deal with supernatural events unfolding before your eyes?
I was fascinated with the many similarities our cultures share, and the why and how these beliefs are passed on - and them growing faint through the years.
The book gives a total and multisensory experience. From the vibrant scenes, the sumptuous food, the spooky chills, and the sinister whispers - it may be a short volume but it fills and overflows in a good way. All the wonderful illustrations helped me immerse further into Sweet Lian’s life.
I think that fellow Filipinos will enjoy getting to know about the Peranakan culture from our Southeast Asian neighbors. And overall, I think that those looking to read more about other settings and cultures will be beyond satisfied by Looking After the Ashes.
Humorous, witty and downright entertaining. I could practically hear my grandma's voice. If you dont finish all your rice, you will end up with a man with a face full of pockmarks. One pockmark for every grain of rice!
Thank you, Kopi Soh for bringing me down memory lane.
When I read the synopsis, I heard my mom. When I read the preface and the first pages, I knew this one is for me.
A little bit about myself because it fits with this book a little. My parents are from a small county called Brunei (you may be going where in the world is that and I'll just say it's very far away from Canada) so my parents grew up with Malaysian culture integrated into their lives. All of these random sounding superstitions were then passed on to me as they told me about their time growing up. So I was very surprised to see all of the old wives tales and taboos captured in this book because no one really talked about them. And what's even better, Kopi captured it all perfectly.
Looking After the Ashes is a funny read pierced with some supernatural events and a few sad moments as well. This was a culture rich book filled with uncommon superstitions and captivating stories about growing up in a Taoist influenced Peranakan family. Some of them I've been told before while others were fun to discover.
We learn about what happens when you point at the moon, the ghost people who play at the playgrounds at the night, and the evil spirits that want your soul. And were there many evil spirits trying to take souls.
I was surprised to see words like Angkong hoo appear and described. And while the old wives tale is the focus, I'm so glad that Kopi included as much as she can about growing up. The food - specifically the desserts of red tortoise cake and kau chan kuihmade are my absolute favorite things to eat - made my jaw drop at being mentioned. The traditions, from weddings to funerals were detailed and things I've experienced. It was just perfect.
While the pacing was excellent I did find some of the stories to end abruptly where I was looking for a more of a wrap up. I wanted more like the greedy monster I am 😂
Overall, if you want to dive into a Malaysian read pick this up. You'll find a world different from your own and I think you'll have fun reading it.
This book is somewhat a nostalgic journey down memory lane for me. Growing up in the same country in South East Asia as the characters in this book, I have been exposed to similar old wives’ tales and superstitions! The author presented these tales in a very childlike, simplistic manner; very easy to read yet stirs the imagination! The book is packed with a lot of details, cleverly weaved into the storyline, effortlessly. Absolute winner!
It's not some 'beginner's guide to taboos and myths' if you are expecting it to be.
It has a story of a girl who was brought up by the Peranakan family which is in Penang, Malaysia. Because I am from Penang, I can almost relate back all the believes and superstition that I had to follow religiously without knowing the reason. Now, through reading this book page by page, it all makes sense!
I appreciate the linkage of the stories of Swee Lian (the main character) and her family members. It never cease the appreciation of reliving my childhood though the pages.
If you are looking for a good story and reasons why there are so many stuff the Chinese Malaysians are doing (weirdly, at time), you may find the answer by reading through this book.
I rarely read a book as usually there's no interest or its just me not fond of reading a book. However, this book got me interested as it talks about the culture and beliefs in Malaysia which is close to my heart. I could very well relate to many of the stories to my own experiences.
Definitely worth a reading if you like to understand some of the tales from Malaysia and how silly some of those beliefs can be for western culture.
A good read for me, as it did relate some memorable moments I had during my childhood time. The author had brought me back to all my fond memories. Kudos to author Kopi Soh who had creatively written the book and I do enjoy reading the book.
Kopi Soh nailed it! The settings and characters were well written. This is an interesting book in terms of other cultures, customs and beliefs and the fact that it's a real life story of Kopi Soh grew up in her Peranakan heritage.
For me, it's not a book I couldn't put down but I still kept picking it up because I wanted to know more.
When I first heard about this book, I thought it was all about taboos and superstitions only, which I do like to read anyway - but I was pleasantly surprise to find that it is also a semi biography of the author. In fact, very delighted at the surprise. Far more better that just reading about a certain kind of taboo or superstition as it has the personal element in it. Kopi Soh cleverly blend in the superstitions with her personal stories which make this book not a moment of dull reading. One of the best book I have every bought.
This is a fun read to me. Reminds me of my mother and my aunts. I spent my childhood in Indonesia and the stories (old wives tales) told in this book are often told back home. I grew up listening to most of them and really enjoyed reading them.
Author shares her childhood stories basically from when she’s in her mother’s womb until she’s old enough to understand all the tales she heard growing up in a big Peranakan family
I love the writing style, suits this storytelling method. You can even read it as bedtime stories! There are a lot (seriously) of old wives tales, superstitions, taboos, subtly insert and not underwhelming. In fact, very heartwarming and hilarious! The times when Ah Lian pointed to the moon and get cuts? Stealing cookies from cabinet? Counting knobs on her palm to predict future children? BEEN THERE DONE THAT 🤣🤣🤣
I was surprised that I know quite a lot. Everything came to mind when reading this. I wasn’t born Peranakan but these stories mostly passed from my father, from his mother whom practicing some of these taboos as well. According to my mom, she had to mandi with yellow* cloth & flowers when she gave birth to me and when I got married later, I had to mandi with *7 siraman I don’t know what (*if I remember it correctly). Something to do with title. Gotta ask grandma later! 😅
Since I wasn’t close to any Peranakan, this book gave me so many insightful stories about this special heritage. Didn’t know that most of them are less likely to speak Mandarin. To us Asians, big family is definitely our thing. And there’ll always be Charlie, the one annoyingly naughty cousin 😂 Tua Kor is by far my fav person, she really has lots of stories to tell that I wanna sit down and hear them too
And poor Choo Choo Kor and Ah Hoon Cheh ☹️ glad Ah Lian & Geok Poh learned their lessons!
Anyway, food can’t be separated when it comes to Asian tales. I love that there are so many of my favourite delicacies being mentioned! E.g Ang Ku kueh, mooncake, fried chempedak, wonton egg noodles, sugar cane juice. Ahh my mouth drools just by mentioning them 🤤 and we got know the stories behind these food too! How wonderful is that?
By the way, anyone jaguh chit liap buah (batu seremban)? If only we can do online tournament! 😂
There are so many I wanted to share from this book but I have to stop for now or else I’ll be spoiling a lot 🤭
Such a book that brings so much nostalgic happy memories & requires preservation for new generations.. definitely 5 🌟 from me!
I said I'd read a chapter every day until I finished the book but I ended up reading several chapters a day because of how easy to follow and quite relatable the stories are.