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The Mother Project: Making it to parenthood the (very) long way round
“Impossible to put down, makes you laugh and cry, Sophie’s story is inspirational. It gives us so much hope and encouragement. I don’t think we would be where we are on our own journey without her advice.”
OLLIE LOCKE “A read so twisty your heart pounds as you turn the pages.”
THE SUNDAY TIMES Brave, funny and honest, columnist Sophie Beresiner takes us on her complex journey to parenthood and shows us that there’s more than one way to become a mother. Sophie’s journey to motherhood began aged 30 with a cancer diagnosis that stole her fertility. Today, Sophie is older, wiser (and agonisingly excellent at hindsight), and somewhat battered. Through interminable cycles of hope and failure, her infertility story spanned three countries, five surrogates and a debt she’d rather not dwell on. Part memoir, part manifesto, The Mother Project is the epic story of Sophie’s quest for happiness. Exploring the complexities, expectations and injustices faced by millions of women across the world, it is a book that is both personal and universal.
OLLIE LOCKE “A read so twisty your heart pounds as you turn the pages.”
THE SUNDAY TIMES Brave, funny and honest, columnist Sophie Beresiner takes us on her complex journey to parenthood and shows us that there’s more than one way to become a mother. Sophie’s journey to motherhood began aged 30 with a cancer diagnosis that stole her fertility. Today, Sophie is older, wiser (and agonisingly excellent at hindsight), and somewhat battered. Through interminable cycles of hope and failure, her infertility story spanned three countries, five surrogates and a debt she’d rather not dwell on. Part memoir, part manifesto, The Mother Project is the epic story of Sophie’s quest for happiness. Exploring the complexities, expectations and injustices faced by millions of women across the world, it is a book that is both personal and universal.
- GenresNonfiction
320 pages, Hardcover
Published May 27, 2021
4 people are currently reading
334 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
April 28, 2025
Wow!! Just wow!! Ten stars if I could!! Impressive, easy writing style which had me laughing, crying and learning!
What a beautiful, heartfelt story. Thank you for sharing such difficult, personal experiences. Both my daughters work for an amazing company in this field. Your story confirms there are truly angels out there!!
What a beautiful, heartfelt story. Thank you for sharing such difficult, personal experiences. Both my daughters work for an amazing company in this field. Your story confirms there are truly angels out there!!
April 10, 2022
What do you do if the one thing you want most in this world—in this case, having a baby—is consistently, cruelly denied to you? If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result, then Sophie Beresiner is stark raving crazy. Like a fox. An awe-inspiring, incredible, I-will-not-be-denied fox. Who goes through utter hell repeatedly and some how, some way comes out the other side with a baby in her arms. This is her incredible story.
Having survived cancer—a horrific ordeal in its own right, though merely the prelude to this story—Sophie and her husband, Mr. B, want to have a baby. But cancer has robbed her of her fertility. Devastated but undeterred after several failed attempts via IVF, they turn to surrogacy. With six embryos ready to go, the scientific odds of a successful surrogacy pregnancy are very high, right? Right.
Unless…
Unless everything that can go wrong goes wrong. And you become that seeming impossibility. Which is what seems to happen to Sophie and Mr. B. After five failed surrogacies with different surrogates, they’re down to their last chance embryo. (Did I mention this book reads like a thriller too?) When your dream of starting a family has been so brutally crushed time and time again against all odds, how do you go on—emotionally, psychologically, financially? Then again, how do you stop?
Sophie’s book takes you through this seemingly impossible journey. And I cannot recommend it enough. It’s so beautiful, so inspiring, and so full of emotions—heartbreak, tragedy, hope, joy, and crying. Lots of crying. I’ve never read anything like it. And can barely believe it’s true. It will tear your heart to shreds, throw it on the ground, and set it on fire. And then mend it back together again stronger than it was before.
The book is many things. A tragic drama yet feel-good tearjerker, yes. Some comedy to lighten the mood? Deftly so. But it’s also a testament to not take things for granted. A reminder to stop, breathe, and appreciate. To live.
And it’s a love letter to their daughter Marlies. Yes, the very daughter that is the dream of this entire project. I don’t know that I believe in miracles per se, but if they exist, surely Marlies is one. One can’t help but think what a gift it will be for her to read when of age. Like the gold mezuzah necklace Sophie’s dad gives her that she rolls between her fingers for comfort. Like finding your parents old letters and pictures from before you were born stowed away in an attic. “My parents had a life before me?” Oh Marlies did they! A life that would make most of us cave, give in, give up. But not your parents. They fought on. For you.
The book is also like an anthem. For those struggling with infertility of course. But also for anyone struggling with their own dreams deferred. (It helped me with a pivotal breakthrough in my battle with OCD.) In my darker moments, I sometimes play the Florence and the Machine song “Shake it out” for motivation. Have you heard it? I love it. It’s a soaring anthem of a song, in which she laments she can never leave the past behind before reaching the chorus’s epiphany:
“I’m always dragging that horse around
All of his questions, such a mournful sound
Tonight I’m gonna bury that horse in the ground
Cause I like to keep my issues drawn
But it’s always darkest before the dawn
Shake it out shake it out… oh whoa oh…
And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back, so shake him off… oh whoa oh”
This is like that: a soaring anthem of a book. It makes you dare to believe in the impossible. As a misanthrope, I’m fond of Shakespeare’s adage: “Life is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” Yes, often. But then stories like this remind me that sometimes there’s more than just sound and fury. Then, sometimes, there’s joy. There’s purpose. There’s that impossibility that is Marlies. Full of her own sound and fury but signifying everything.
Having survived cancer—a horrific ordeal in its own right, though merely the prelude to this story—Sophie and her husband, Mr. B, want to have a baby. But cancer has robbed her of her fertility. Devastated but undeterred after several failed attempts via IVF, they turn to surrogacy. With six embryos ready to go, the scientific odds of a successful surrogacy pregnancy are very high, right? Right.
Unless…
Unless everything that can go wrong goes wrong. And you become that seeming impossibility. Which is what seems to happen to Sophie and Mr. B. After five failed surrogacies with different surrogates, they’re down to their last chance embryo. (Did I mention this book reads like a thriller too?) When your dream of starting a family has been so brutally crushed time and time again against all odds, how do you go on—emotionally, psychologically, financially? Then again, how do you stop?
Sophie’s book takes you through this seemingly impossible journey. And I cannot recommend it enough. It’s so beautiful, so inspiring, and so full of emotions—heartbreak, tragedy, hope, joy, and crying. Lots of crying. I’ve never read anything like it. And can barely believe it’s true. It will tear your heart to shreds, throw it on the ground, and set it on fire. And then mend it back together again stronger than it was before.
The book is many things. A tragic drama yet feel-good tearjerker, yes. Some comedy to lighten the mood? Deftly so. But it’s also a testament to not take things for granted. A reminder to stop, breathe, and appreciate. To live.
And it’s a love letter to their daughter Marlies. Yes, the very daughter that is the dream of this entire project. I don’t know that I believe in miracles per se, but if they exist, surely Marlies is one. One can’t help but think what a gift it will be for her to read when of age. Like the gold mezuzah necklace Sophie’s dad gives her that she rolls between her fingers for comfort. Like finding your parents old letters and pictures from before you were born stowed away in an attic. “My parents had a life before me?” Oh Marlies did they! A life that would make most of us cave, give in, give up. But not your parents. They fought on. For you.
The book is also like an anthem. For those struggling with infertility of course. But also for anyone struggling with their own dreams deferred. (It helped me with a pivotal breakthrough in my battle with OCD.) In my darker moments, I sometimes play the Florence and the Machine song “Shake it out” for motivation. Have you heard it? I love it. It’s a soaring anthem of a song, in which she laments she can never leave the past behind before reaching the chorus’s epiphany:
“I’m always dragging that horse around
All of his questions, such a mournful sound
Tonight I’m gonna bury that horse in the ground
Cause I like to keep my issues drawn
But it’s always darkest before the dawn
Shake it out shake it out… oh whoa oh…
And it’s hard to dance with a devil on your back, so shake him off… oh whoa oh”
This is like that: a soaring anthem of a book. It makes you dare to believe in the impossible. As a misanthrope, I’m fond of Shakespeare’s adage: “Life is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” Yes, often. But then stories like this remind me that sometimes there’s more than just sound and fury. Then, sometimes, there’s joy. There’s purpose. There’s that impossibility that is Marlies. Full of her own sound and fury but signifying everything.
October 4, 2021
I really enjoyed reading Sophie’s story. A story of perseverance, loyalty and family at the heart of a dream. Heartwarming, and at times shocking in terms of the treatment and expense endured to have a baby. I am so pleased this family got there in the end. There really is nothing like the heartbreak and emotional turmoil of ivf. I know have had my eyes opened to surrogacy also. Thanks for sharing your story Sophie.
October 13, 2021
I loved this book. It was often a bit tough to read for me as it brought back a lot of emotion about my own fertility struggles. But I thought it is an important story to help shine a light on what these struggles are actually like and to highlight needed changes to the surrogacy laws in the UK. I only hope someday I can be so open and honest about telling my story!
August 30, 2021
Gorgeous, moving and uplifting read
Whole-heartedly recommended. Worth anyone's time. This was such a moving, gripping story. I look forward to reading much more of Sophie's writing.
Whole-heartedly recommended. Worth anyone's time. This was such a moving, gripping story. I look forward to reading much more of Sophie's writing.
September 30, 2021
This book made me laugh, cry, feel sick with worry and wooop for joy when the couple finally got their little miracle! Marlie is absolutely gorgeous and looks like a mammas girl 🥰 wishing your lovely family all love the love in the world!
October 16, 2021
Beautiful, incredible story. Sophie & Mr B are so strong and I cried with joy for them at the ending.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 31, 2023
I don't think I could have dealt with all that. Such a brave woman. Honestly glad to read she had her baby and the second one this year.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews