Wanderlost: Falling from Grace and Finding Mercy in All the Wrong Places

by Natalie Toon Patton

A coming-of-age travel memoir that probes thorny spiritual questions while taking the reader on a wild ride from the deep American South to the Middle East, Europe, and the Far East. Once the golden girl of her Arkansas town, Natalie finds herself squeezed under small town shame and rejection after being kicked out of church for getting a divorce. It’s a hard fall off of a sanctimonious high horse, and religious fundamentalism has left her feeling broken and stuck. But she can’t shake the ‘wanderlust woes’ that have plagued her since childhood, so she runs away to the Middle East. As a mostly-sheltered Southerner, she struggles to adapt but is determined to be ‘at home’ in the world.  Her journey is more than a pilgrimage, it’s a a one-way ticket to elsewhere in search of the place of her own resurrection. Within these pages is a suspenseful adventure filled with love, loss, laughter, tears, and a little bit of scandalous behavior, but at the heart of it, Natalie walks squarely into the unknown to confront the secret matters of the soul that we wrestle with at night.  
 

Genres: Memoir, Contemporary

288 pages, Paperback

Published October 26, 2021

Reviews

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I struggled with how to rate this book. Looking at it from simply a memoir/travelogue perspective, I would rate it 4 stars. I enjoyed reading about her experiences and a lot of her insights were really powerful. But it was too preachy for me and seemed like she was trying to create her own new and improved form of Christianity. This was a big turn off for me. Not only because I didn’t agree with her conclusions, but there seemed to be a lot of holes in her thinking and flat out ignorance honestly.

For example, Christianity is not a Western religion at heart. The New Testament Church was planted in a culture very similar to most middle eastern Muslim countries’ cultures today. To try to say that Christianity can’t fit into that country’s culture because it’s a “Western” thing is ignorant. I think a lot of people who travel and meet people from all over want to say that “every road leads to God” but I don’t believe it. So much of what she is saying is true… nix the shame in religion, see the face of Christ in every person, we aren’t any better than them, etc… but Jesus, a middle eastern, Jewish man is the Way, the Truth and the Life and the heart of what he taught and embodied is counter to every culture. Ok I’ll get off my soap box now.

Also, this woman has lived in many different countries and I think she has a lot of valuable insight because of this, however, she never seemed to go very deep in any of them. What I mean by that is, she never learned the language or had a lot of deep friendships or community with local people. Without learning the language, it’s hard to truly understand a culture or a people group. When you live on the “fringes” of a culture it’s easy to either criticize what you don’t understand or overall praise what seems novel and interesting. The reality is that neither of these things are the truth. Every culture has its positive and negative aspects… I think it’s wrong to bash your own culture while fawning over another that you don’t truly understand. I am speaking from my own experience as I have lived overseas for a significant period of time in the same country where I have learned the langue and live in community with local people.

I really don’t mean to be super critical but I couldn’t leave it without expressing some of my thoughts while reading.

[Aimee Hubmann · Rating 5 out of 5]

For any who hear whispers behind the “imaginary door called Alluring Expressions of Faith” and are keen to open it...288 pages to an upgraded worldview!

From dark tunnel to expansive blue harbor, Natalie Toon Patton unpacks much more than just a spellbinding memoir of her intercontinental/intercultural peregrinations. The beauty of her prose is otherworldly throughout, and the masterful weaving in of significant song titles, jolting quotes and even vulnerable letters to self add dimension. Her story is permeated with human universals that sing as she bravely interrogates the assumptions, implicit and explicit, from her particular faith background as an American evangelical female. As the subtitle teases, the telos of Wanderlost is: suggesting that the cosmos is incandescent with Divine mercy, a theological punctuation mark that is brimming with both hope and crucial implications for the revitalization of Spirit filled, Christlike and fruitful discipleship in God's good diverse and complex world.

[MyLan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a great read! It was like watching travel influencers on Instagram but make it spiritual

[Kallie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do you love to travel? Has life ever left you with unanswered questions or wandering trying to find your way? Natalie asked me to join her launch team, and as her friend I considered it an honor, but as an avid lifelong reader I now know it was a gift. The words in this book, the stories she tells, the deeply personal moments of life she shares capture you from the first page. This memoir is both searing with conviction from learning through a life’s unexpected curves and brimming with love for God and people who found her in places she never knew to even look. Her love for people across cultures and her travels through many countries across the globe invite you in as a reader with uniqueness and wonder. Her personal journey begins from the heart of the American south with the typical American good girl church experience. Life however takes its turns through abuse, betrayal, divorce, and loss. Through bravely sharing even her darkest moments, Natalie reveals the crushing facade of religion and power, with a fierce compassion for whoever it leaves in its wake. You can not read this book and walk away untouched. Wanderlost calls us all bravely with a loving vulnerability into Natalie’s life, with all of its pain and beauty. In doing so, she gives us all permission and courage to find a more meaningful way forward through our own, no matter how long we have to wander or how lost we feel.

[J · Rating 5 out of 5]

On so many levels, Natalie describes what it’s like to leave, to wander, to question and to see. This is a book that doesn’t seek to give easy answers as much as it is to find the questions and leaves you at the end wanting to hear more. It’s many things at once - it’s a modern pilgrimage. Just like in the pilgrimages of ancient times, it’s both a physical journey that crosses continents and learns from the journeys, as it embraces the full depth of humanity - it’s a pilgrimage that is fully human, body, soul and spirit - never neglecting any of the journey. Starting in Arkansas and journeying around the world, it leaves the you thinking at the end about her story for a much longer time. Much like a Celtic exploration of thin spaces, this book weaves the personal with the spiritual and and crafts in travel and exploration as well. The title indicates wandering and loss, but it’s also a tale of finding and homecoming. The way travel changes her and yet at the same time shows how it draws her to being more fully herself.

This is book that deserves to be read slowly by a fireplace, considered and then read again. Of wandering and becoming.

[Nancy Noble · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went on a spending spree at my favorite publisher, Paraclete Books, and this is one of the titles that intrigued me - I thought a friend of mine may like it, as she is a spiritual soul who loves to travel. Of course I had to read it first - and loved it! What an inspiring story, and so beautifully written (and very funny!). There is much here to chew on, and reread. I'm also intrigued by the intersection of travel and spirituality. I loved how the author's perceptions changed with her exposure to different cultures and faiths and people. I think that happens to some of us, who keep our faith in God, but it evolves with our life story, and what we are drawn to (such as Celtic Christianity). Church and religion can disappoint us (reading "Jesus and John Wayne" was a real eye opener), and as we peel away the layers we try to find what remains true. Anyway, a highly recommended book that I will think about for a long time.

[Carol · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved Natalie's writing style from the first. She has a beautiful way of bringing her reader along with her from her early years to her years of establishing herself and discovering herself in such amazing and unlikely places. Natalie takes us on a journey. Giving us a peak at some of the most well known centers of the world, but from the most ordinary experiences. I feel like she made it possible to see and smell and taste corners of the world most will never venture. But at the same time, she pulls back some of the curtains that have given us a narrow view.
I know others will enjoy and be awakened as they joining her on this journey.

[Natalie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wanderlost was an exciting, captivating, and meaningful read. I was left with a fresh perspective on life, humanity, faith, and the way that I view and love others. Natalie’s travels and experiences took me on a journey through her religious transformation and brought forth some of my own deep questions as it pertains to faith, mercy, and God. I truly feel like her memoir has helped me become a better person and given me a fresh lens. Her sense of humor, wittiness, and style of writing also had me captivated the entire time and added some lightness to some of the heavier topics. I really could not recommend this book enough!

[Crystal Young · Rating 5 out of 5]

Penned by a woman dismissed and subsequently harassed by church leaders for divorcing her abusive husband, this memoir could easily have become a scathing criticism of evangelical practices, but it isn’t. Instead, it’s a story about God meeting the “good but not quite good enough” girl outside church walls. It’s about the relentless mercy permeating every nook and cranny of the globe, unbound by race, political boundaries, and religion. And most beautifully of all, it’s a story of reclaiming Christianity from worldly kingdoms and systems and instead waking up to Christ within and around us—in all things, in all people.

[Nicole Wood · Rating 5 out of 5]

Natalie Toon Patton is a gifted writer and takes her reader along an inspiring and moving journey to find God in the dark corners of the Earth. This book is relatable and able to put into words so many parts of my own spiritual journey that are difficult to articulate. Upon finishing Wanderlost I feel uplifted and can spot the Devine in more places than I ever did in the uncomfortable pews of a conservative church. Thank you Natalie for your vulnerability and openness that has produced such an amazing story.

[Breanna Randall · Rating 4 out of 5]

Travelogue and spiritual memoir all wrapped in one. This is a personal and relatable story about faith shift and learning to see God differently while standing in a different part of the world (on "a street full of splendid strangers," as Chesterton might put it).

If you cannot travel right now but appreciate reflecting on topics like Christian spirituality and changing our minds, written through the lens of a travelogue, this might be the book for you!

[Carol · Rating 4 out of 5]

I finished Wanderlost by Natalie Toon Pattron. It was a coming of age, travel, spiritual memoir! She grew up in rural Arkansas and lefr early to get away from it. Usually I eat up memoirs but not this one. It is a fast read though. It is also very honest. Her family was evangeliical with a lot of emphasis on shane and guilt. The author tried to be perfect but she always failed. Not the kind of family that I would be comfortable in. Married too young, she was searching for her true self. Her first husband was what my aunts would call "a no account". Naltalie met her husband in high school, a handsome exchange student from Brazil. After thy married, he wanted her to do everything his way, including not blow drying her hair! She worked at a Fox affilate TV station and he was always looking for a job and drinking beer. They went to a big Evangelical church and by the time that she could not take any more verabla and physical abuse, she quit her job and moved away to an apartment. Under the door, a letter from the church said that she could no longer be a member of the church because she had no grounds for leaving her husband.

Later she took a job that would take her to the Middle East First she was in Jordan and had to make the adjustment from the rural Arkansas evangelical culture to try to do her job there, she learned about the the culture through her eyes while she grappled with many different religious question, a few that I care about deeply like what Love Thy Neighbor to a lot that I never wanted to bother with. Her job took her to Syria, and other Middle Eastern countries. I dsagreed with her religiouis conclusions but then I have had a very different life experince.

[Maria · Rating 5 out of 5]

NOTE: I received a free eBook copy of this book from LibraryThing's Early Reviewers (March 2022).

This is not an ordinary travel memoir. Rather, it is the story of the author's personal transformation from an provincial, evangelical Arkansas girl to a cosmopolitan woman with a reinvented perspective on her faith. Patton recounts her youth, her early career and religious upbringing, and her failed first marriage before launching into her travelogue, which took her to Turkey, Jordan, Israel, Syria, the UAE, Tanzania, Japan, and Thailand. Her story is thoroughly engrossing, as she recounts many weird-but-true stories (such as a request for a romantic relationship from a UAE Sheik's son!) that are better than fiction. I was captivated by Patton's personal development and growth, as she related how aspects of her early involvement with an evangelical "Christian" congregation was detrimental to her interpersonal relationships and sense of self. It's clear that she evolved a lot over the course of her life and abandoned much of the earlier dogma to which she subscribed, but sometimes her tone is still a little preachy. Her experiences with a Somali refugee family in Thailand should be required reading for anyone needing to know more about issues impacting immigration. Cheers to Patton for sharing the ups and downs of her life story and broadening the horizons for readers everywhere!

[Lynn Hague · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best memoir I’ve read this year! You can’t help but get caught up in Natalie’s journey from Arkansas to the far corners of the world. Her descriptive writing is captivating, calling you to come along with her on a very personal journey of heartbreak and hope. From fundamental evangelical circles to finding God in all of the places we were told he wasn’t in Sunday school, this book is relatable but will also stretch you to see God’s larger table. I am better for having read it!

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book so much. It’s such an honest and open look at what it’s like to leave home and discover the world outside. Natalie takes you on a journey of self discovery that everyone can relate to. She has such amazing adventure stories to tell and yet they all resonate with something deep inside us all. I love how she finds the Divine in every place and person she meets. I wanted it to keep going so I could see what comes next!

[Bookish207 · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book! It's like the book you wish Eat Pray Love would have been if it had been more thoughtful and self-aware. Wanderlost by Natalie Toon Patton is a fascinating travelogue with a throughline of healing from church trauma from her childhood and finding a more authentic expression of her faith. I've dog-eared the heck out of the book as there are so many good quotes and thoughts to return to. This is one I will recommend to my friends!

[Kristin · Rating 5 out of 5]

A book I didn’t know I needed to read at just the right time. How lucky we are as readers to join Natalie on her epic travels and faith journey. She elegantly articulates many thoughts I’ve had in the midst of my own faith deconstruction. I’m grateful for getting the chance to see the world, and finding mercy, through her eyes.

[Aaron · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was absorbed in inspired throughout the entire book. It was eye opening to read about Natalie’s journey of self discovery and the obstacles that she had to overcome. It really resonated with my spiritual journey, and I’m sure it will do the same for so many others. I highly recommend!

[Jen Morris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading Wanderlost felt like being wrapped in a cozy blanket while drinking from a cup of soul-warming courage. What a gift of companionship for the curious, open-hearted, abundant life adventurers who have eyes to see and ears to hear!

[Traci Rhoades · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'll be thinking about this book for some time. What a life the author lived. At times, I would have edited further, or expanded in other sections. Overall, a worthwhile read.

[Betty · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overall decent story about the author and her life in Arkansas and then all over the world. I didn't like the very long sections where she tried to "preach" to the reader.