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The Preternatural Chronicles: Books 0-3
The first three novels and the prequel novella in the Preternatural I'm Glad You're Dead, Dawn and Quartered, Shadow of a Doubt, and Deliverance.
My name is John Cook, and my life began the day my heart stopped beating. You meet the most interesting men in Medieval prisons. This one time, I met a guy who offered me immortality for the low, low price of changing my diet. I didn’t read the fine print. Because he wasn’t talking about a gluten free diet. More like hemoglobin full . And now I’m a friggin’ vampire with five centuries of pop culture references. Granted, at the time, I was listening to the dying screams of my mother and father being burned and eviscerated alive just outside the rusty bars of the prison cell, and my new best friend was offering me my only real chance at saving my own life and avenging my parents’ murderers—some day. Except my first chance at vengeance took about five hundred years, and I had to wade through oceans of sin and violence, blackening my soul—and my already dark sense of humor—beyond redemption until I met Father Thomes—a Roman Catholic Priest—in present-day Houston. Papa Thomes taught me how to use my dark curse to fight for the good guys. Like Alfred and Robin did for Batman—except we straight up murder Jokers and Two-Faces. Biteman and Pope’n . We stand up for the downtrodden, the forgotten, and the neglected… By exsanguinating the wicked in horrific, truly imaginative ways, and having a grand ol’ time doing it. You know what they say about doing what you love… But our party is soon cut short when we learn the End of Days is just around the corner, and that the fine print of my contract might have hidden a few other tidbits. Like the fact that I was central to kicking off the Apocalypse, and that the Archdemons will stop at nothing to make sure The Dude Abides by the terms of his contract. I guess I need a lawyer. Get ready to laugh at extreme violence. I know I will. If you’re not laughing, you’re learning.
If you like Jim Butcher, Shayne Silvers, Cameron O’Connell, Kevin Hearne, Steve McHugh, Ilona Andrews, Patricia Briggs, Shannon Mayer, or K.F. Breene, you won't be able to put down the highly addictive Preternatural Chronicles.
“Hunter Blain is my spirit animal.” — Shayne Silvers, Amazon Top 25 Bestselling Author
Available in digital, print, and audiobook formats.
What Amazon readers are ★★★★★ ‘Let me count the ways I blood thee…’ ★★★★★ ‘Move over Dresden!’ ★★★★★ ‘The Preternatural Chronicles MUST come to Netflix. Now.’ ★★★★★ ‘John Cook puts the G.O.A.T. in gloat.’ ★★★★★ ‘Shayne Silvers has found the next author to take over Urban Fantasy.’ ★★★★★ ‘I need John Cook to have a story with Nate Temple. Please.’ ★★★★★ ‘John Cook loves vegans. Especially when they are served raw.’ ★★★★★ ‘The only thing that sparkles about this vampire is his fangs in the moonlight.’ ★★★★★ ‘All the twisted humor of Pulp Fiction, but with a vampire. It’s more like Gulp Fiction.’ ★★★★★ ‘If John Wick was a vampire and hung out with Ryan Reynolds on the weekends.’ ★★★★★ ‘Revenge is for amateurs, but vengeance is for professional vampires who take their jobs seriously. Like John Cook.’ ★★★★★ ‘Fans of Morbius, Blade, Buffy, Shade of Devil, and Deadpool will love the Preternatural Chronicles.
Books in the Preternatural Deliverance—Book 0.5: B07V3GBZ47 I’m Glad You’re Dead—Book 1: B07PG3CGG8 Dawn and Quartered—Book 2: B07SS6PDJY Shadow of a Doubt—Book 3: B0821YGZPQ Moonlight Equilibrium—Book 3.5: B086RY3WHZ Mouth of Madness—Book 4: B086FX5B87 What the Hell—Book 5: B088BG92DX Holy Sheoly — Book 6: B08FY48D9F Those Wonderful Toys—Book 7: B08RX1NCQ9
My name is John Cook, and my life began the day my heart stopped beating. You meet the most interesting men in Medieval prisons. This one time, I met a guy who offered me immortality for the low, low price of changing my diet. I didn’t read the fine print. Because he wasn’t talking about a gluten free diet. More like hemoglobin full . And now I’m a friggin’ vampire with five centuries of pop culture references. Granted, at the time, I was listening to the dying screams of my mother and father being burned and eviscerated alive just outside the rusty bars of the prison cell, and my new best friend was offering me my only real chance at saving my own life and avenging my parents’ murderers—some day. Except my first chance at vengeance took about five hundred years, and I had to wade through oceans of sin and violence, blackening my soul—and my already dark sense of humor—beyond redemption until I met Father Thomes—a Roman Catholic Priest—in present-day Houston. Papa Thomes taught me how to use my dark curse to fight for the good guys. Like Alfred and Robin did for Batman—except we straight up murder Jokers and Two-Faces. Biteman and Pope’n . We stand up for the downtrodden, the forgotten, and the neglected… By exsanguinating the wicked in horrific, truly imaginative ways, and having a grand ol’ time doing it. You know what they say about doing what you love… But our party is soon cut short when we learn the End of Days is just around the corner, and that the fine print of my contract might have hidden a few other tidbits. Like the fact that I was central to kicking off the Apocalypse, and that the Archdemons will stop at nothing to make sure The Dude Abides by the terms of his contract. I guess I need a lawyer. Get ready to laugh at extreme violence. I know I will. If you’re not laughing, you’re learning.
If you like Jim Butcher, Shayne Silvers, Cameron O’Connell, Kevin Hearne, Steve McHugh, Ilona Andrews, Patricia Briggs, Shannon Mayer, or K.F. Breene, you won't be able to put down the highly addictive Preternatural Chronicles.
“Hunter Blain is my spirit animal.” — Shayne Silvers, Amazon Top 25 Bestselling Author
Available in digital, print, and audiobook formats.
What Amazon readers are ★★★★★ ‘Let me count the ways I blood thee…’ ★★★★★ ‘Move over Dresden!’ ★★★★★ ‘The Preternatural Chronicles MUST come to Netflix. Now.’ ★★★★★ ‘John Cook puts the G.O.A.T. in gloat.’ ★★★★★ ‘Shayne Silvers has found the next author to take over Urban Fantasy.’ ★★★★★ ‘I need John Cook to have a story with Nate Temple. Please.’ ★★★★★ ‘John Cook loves vegans. Especially when they are served raw.’ ★★★★★ ‘The only thing that sparkles about this vampire is his fangs in the moonlight.’ ★★★★★ ‘All the twisted humor of Pulp Fiction, but with a vampire. It’s more like Gulp Fiction.’ ★★★★★ ‘If John Wick was a vampire and hung out with Ryan Reynolds on the weekends.’ ★★★★★ ‘Revenge is for amateurs, but vengeance is for professional vampires who take their jobs seriously. Like John Cook.’ ★★★★★ ‘Fans of Morbius, Blade, Buffy, Shade of Devil, and Deadpool will love the Preternatural Chronicles.
Books in the Preternatural Deliverance—Book 0.5: B07V3GBZ47 I’m Glad You’re Dead—Book 1: B07PG3CGG8 Dawn and Quartered—Book 2: B07SS6PDJY Shadow of a Doubt—Book 3: B0821YGZPQ Moonlight Equilibrium—Book 3.5: B086RY3WHZ Mouth of Madness—Book 4: B086FX5B87 What the Hell—Book 5: B088BG92DX Holy Sheoly — Book 6: B08FY48D9F Those Wonderful Toys—Book 7: B08RX1NCQ9
703 pages, Kindle Edition
Published March 28, 2021
73 people are currently reading
14 people want to read
About the author
Hunter Blain
32 books202 followersMy name is Hunter, and I’m a wordaholic. I’m also about to break the fourth wall…of your mindhole. Because there is a true story behind this…well…story.
It begins with two best friends who grew up together, breaking rules and raising hell as they shaped each other’s personalities into the shameless assholes they are today. Well, at least for one of them, but I’ll get to that in a moment. These two boys—let’s call them Hunter and John—were all but inseparable. John excelled at creating music powerful enough to make angels weep and being the funniest asshole in Texas while Hunter dabbled—poorly, I might add—in his humble writings. Because they were self-declared brothers from other mothers, John respected Hunter’s humble writings as much as I—I mean Hunter (stupid third person perspective)—respected John’s musical magic. John’s tunes could have changed the world, one day…
One fine day, after reading one of Hunter’s horrifically detailed short stories about a serial killer, John asked Hunter to write a story about him.
“Hell yeah, dude! What do you want to be?” Hunter asked, brimming with honor and biting back a very manly squee.
“A vampire,” John responded with a mischievous gleam in his eye. “But not one of those sparkly ones. A true bad ass!”
“Done!” Hunter crowed with a smile and an accompanying high five.
“No, dude. Promise. Promise you’ll write and finish a book about me. You are the most prolific writer of our generation!” John said. (Something like that. I might be paraphrasing a little, but you get the gist of it). “I would consider it an honor to live on for eternity with your words as my life’s blood.”
Hunter agreed, never to realize the weight of that promise until one Sunday morning when John’s mother called, crying incoherently.
John…had died.
Hunter was left in a cold world without his best friend and doppelgänger. Hunter still thinks about that moment to this day. How the morning light crept through the bedroom window while Hunter stared at the ceiling, noticing how the popcorn texture created cruel, jagged shadows. How everything started to blur as his chest was crushed beneath the weight of what he was hearing, each word stacking heavily upon the other until only fitful, ragged gasps of air could escape his throat. Only fiery tears existed, especially after the horrific realization that Hunter now had to make some of the hardest phone calls of his life to the circle of friends who orbited around John’s solar pull.
Their star was no more, leaving their universe a colder and darker place.
John not only left Hunter, but a friend named Valenta as well. There was also Nathanial and Depweg. The friends were each stricken numb with the loss of such a beloved flare of life. But…
When the three found out that Hunter was keeping his promise to write the greatest story ever told—starring their dear friend, John—they demanded to be a part of the adventure. Each of them immediately knew what type of supernatural character they wanted to play in this urban fantasy eulogy. It would be a funeral pyre of words, and their fictional personas would be John’s pallbearers.
So please, as you read the following pages, feel free to laugh. Laugh at the situations John is placed in and his dickish dialogue to those around him, because John is 100% in this story without alteration (albeit he is a vampire). Laugh and let his memory live on inside the theater of your mind. Like he does in ours.
Thank you, sincerely, from the bottom of my beating heart, for giving my best friend the chance to live again. You are part of this magical ritual, and that would make him the happiest man in the…well, wherever the hell he is.
It begins with two best friends who grew up together, breaking rules and raising hell as they shaped each other’s personalities into the shameless assholes they are today. Well, at least for one of them, but I’ll get to that in a moment. These two boys—let’s call them Hunter and John—were all but inseparable. John excelled at creating music powerful enough to make angels weep and being the funniest asshole in Texas while Hunter dabbled—poorly, I might add—in his humble writings. Because they were self-declared brothers from other mothers, John respected Hunter’s humble writings as much as I—I mean Hunter (stupid third person perspective)—respected John’s musical magic. John’s tunes could have changed the world, one day…
One fine day, after reading one of Hunter’s horrifically detailed short stories about a serial killer, John asked Hunter to write a story about him.
“Hell yeah, dude! What do you want to be?” Hunter asked, brimming with honor and biting back a very manly squee.
“A vampire,” John responded with a mischievous gleam in his eye. “But not one of those sparkly ones. A true bad ass!”
“Done!” Hunter crowed with a smile and an accompanying high five.
“No, dude. Promise. Promise you’ll write and finish a book about me. You are the most prolific writer of our generation!” John said. (Something like that. I might be paraphrasing a little, but you get the gist of it). “I would consider it an honor to live on for eternity with your words as my life’s blood.”
Hunter agreed, never to realize the weight of that promise until one Sunday morning when John’s mother called, crying incoherently.
John…had died.
Hunter was left in a cold world without his best friend and doppelgänger. Hunter still thinks about that moment to this day. How the morning light crept through the bedroom window while Hunter stared at the ceiling, noticing how the popcorn texture created cruel, jagged shadows. How everything started to blur as his chest was crushed beneath the weight of what he was hearing, each word stacking heavily upon the other until only fitful, ragged gasps of air could escape his throat. Only fiery tears existed, especially after the horrific realization that Hunter now had to make some of the hardest phone calls of his life to the circle of friends who orbited around John’s solar pull.
Their star was no more, leaving their universe a colder and darker place.
John not only left Hunter, but a friend named Valenta as well. There was also Nathanial and Depweg. The friends were each stricken numb with the loss of such a beloved flare of life. But…
When the three found out that Hunter was keeping his promise to write the greatest story ever told—starring their dear friend, John—they demanded to be a part of the adventure. Each of them immediately knew what type of supernatural character they wanted to play in this urban fantasy eulogy. It would be a funeral pyre of words, and their fictional personas would be John’s pallbearers.
So please, as you read the following pages, feel free to laugh. Laugh at the situations John is placed in and his dickish dialogue to those around him, because John is 100% in this story without alteration (albeit he is a vampire). Laugh and let his memory live on inside the theater of your mind. Like he does in ours.
Thank you, sincerely, from the bottom of my beating heart, for giving my best friend the chance to live again. You are part of this magical ritual, and that would make him the happiest man in the…well, wherever the hell he is.
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
March 30, 2021
4th wall broken
And it can be funny. This is one of the first vampire books where some real life logistics come in to play. For instance, running at super speed, John laments about all the bugs that get stuck in his teeth and beard. I love that!
There is a lot of bang for your buck in this collection. I love this series and believe the author really finds his voice by book 3 and continues to get better.
And it can be funny. This is one of the first vampire books where some real life logistics come in to play. For instance, running at super speed, John laments about all the bugs that get stuck in his teeth and beard. I love that!
There is a lot of bang for your buck in this collection. I love this series and believe the author really finds his voice by book 3 and continues to get better.
April 2, 2021
Lots of John Cook crammed into one big book
John Cook is a vampire searching for redemption. Along the way, he gathers around him a group of like minded preternatural beings to fight the good fight. Oh.. and John’s inner monologue is a cross between Batman and Deadpool.
There’s lots of pop culture references, sarcasm, and a different spin of what it is to be a vampire.
This omnibus edition gives the first 4 books of what will be a 13 book series.
John Cook is a vampire searching for redemption. Along the way, he gathers around him a group of like minded preternatural beings to fight the good fight. Oh.. and John’s inner monologue is a cross between Batman and Deadpool.
There’s lots of pop culture references, sarcasm, and a different spin of what it is to be a vampire.
This omnibus edition gives the first 4 books of what will be a 13 book series.
April 1, 2021
I love John and Depweg!
The books are awesome. The reason Hunter Blain is writing this series is amazing and shows his character and loyalty!
Always need more of my favorite characters, but spoilers!
John On!
The books are awesome. The reason Hunter Blain is writing this series is amazing and shows his character and loyalty!
Always need more of my favorite characters, but spoilers!
John On!
September 21, 2021
An undead smartass
Just my type of guy....undead smart-ass who tries to do the world a favor. Great read, good pace all the way through!
Now I gotta go buy all the rest of the series....
Just my type of guy....undead smart-ass who tries to do the world a favor. Great read, good pace all the way through!
Now I gotta go buy all the rest of the series....
August 22, 2021
Emotional
This series gives all the feelings. I went from horror, disgust, laughter, acceptance to the awwww moment with the puppers.
This series gives all the feelings. I went from horror, disgust, laughter, acceptance to the awwww moment with the puppers.
August 30, 2021
Throughly enjoyable
I absolutely loved this three book bundle. John was incredibly entertaining . The cast of characters that helped John become a better vampire were fantastic.
I absolutely loved this three book bundle. John was incredibly entertaining . The cast of characters that helped John become a better vampire were fantastic.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews