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Mars Attacks Memoirs
Mars Attacks! screenwriter Jonathan Gems has finally been released by the Martian Commander to share his memories and the inner secrets of the movie. These confidential documents have been leaked directly from Area 51, and it’s all here! Studio politics, Hollywood stars, fun, laughter, friendship, mayhem, and the genius of the extra-terrestrial Tim Burton. A must-read for Mars Attacks! fans, and anyone hooked on filmmaking. Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack!
262 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 5, 2021
1 person is currently reading
6 people want to read
About the author
Jonathan Gems
7 books3 followersJonathan Gems was born in 1952, in London and went to a variety of schools because when the tension between his parents became too intense, they’d move house. Like most decent children, he despised school, and left at the age of fourteen to found a magazine called Student, to promote a re-think of the education system. This re-think never happened, and schools are now even worse than they were in the 1970’s.
Initially successful, Student magazine folded after nine issues, in part due to Jonathan’s parents realizing he was too young to be out of school and forcing him to go back. Student, which he produced with Richard Branson, was not a complete loss, however, because it was the birthplace of Virgin Records, which began as a mail-order company selling record albums through the magazine and grew into a chain of record stores, a recording studio, and a successful record label.
So, at the age of fifteen, Jonathan went to the local comprehensive school, from which he was expelled and, after two more schools, he left the school system to work for his father at Gems Wax Models, the family firm, which manufactured wax figures and shop window mannequins. After being trained in every aspect of the business, in order to eventually succeed his father as managing director, his father sold Gems Wax Models to live the life of Riley on the proceeds.
Out of work, Jonathan started a business publishing a comic called It’s All Lies, which ran for six issues, then worked in restaurants, cleaning companies, a travel agency, a hotel, and shops, and wrote and performed songs in several bands, before starting a firm named Capricorn Graphics that printed and sold silkscreened posters, and provided artwork to magazines.
This company was wound up shortly after he was accepted by the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art to do a stage management course. After this, he started a fashion company making clothes designed by Jean Colette Seel, and got a job as an assistant stage-manager at the Open Space Theatre in Tottenham Court Road. Soon after this theatre was closed down, he was hired as stage manager at the Half Moon Theatre in East London, where he wrote his first play – an adaptation of A Christmas Carol – by Charles Dickens, which sparked an interest in writing plays, which he had hitherto avoided because watching his mother’s suffering as a playwright had put him off.
For the next two years, he went on the dole to study playwrighting, and wrote several short plays, which were produced at fringe theatres in London, and a full-length play, The Tax Exile, which was presented successfully at the Bush Theatre. His next play was Naked Robots (Royal Shakespeare Company), followed by The Dentist, and Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom (Royal Court), The Paranormalist (Greenwich Theatre), and Susan’s Breasts (Royal Court.)
He was then hired to work on the movies Nineteen Eighty-Four and White Mischief, both directed by Michael Radford, followed by Batman, directed by Tim Burton, after which he spent nine years in Los Angeles working on a wide variety of projects including the movies Cry Baby, Mars Attacks! and The Treat, which he also directed.
On the verge of directing his second feature, he fell ill with Hepatitis C – was given three to five years to live by the doctors – and returned to London.
For the next twenty years, he was ill with Hep C – with symptoms similar to chronic fatigue syndrome – until, in 2018, he was cured thanks to a combination of natural and allopathic medicine.
In 2019, he published a book on the British film industry called Who Killed British Cinema? – co-written with Vinod Mahindru.
In 2021, he plans on releasing Mars Attacks Memoirs based on the 1996 cult classic movie Mars Attacks! Followed by further books called Hollyweird, Griselda, In The Mood, Where Monsters Dwell and many others which are yet to be announced.
Initially successful, Student magazine folded after nine issues, in part due to Jonathan’s parents realizing he was too young to be out of school and forcing him to go back. Student, which he produced with Richard Branson, was not a complete loss, however, because it was the birthplace of Virgin Records, which began as a mail-order company selling record albums through the magazine and grew into a chain of record stores, a recording studio, and a successful record label.
So, at the age of fifteen, Jonathan went to the local comprehensive school, from which he was expelled and, after two more schools, he left the school system to work for his father at Gems Wax Models, the family firm, which manufactured wax figures and shop window mannequins. After being trained in every aspect of the business, in order to eventually succeed his father as managing director, his father sold Gems Wax Models to live the life of Riley on the proceeds.
Out of work, Jonathan started a business publishing a comic called It’s All Lies, which ran for six issues, then worked in restaurants, cleaning companies, a travel agency, a hotel, and shops, and wrote and performed songs in several bands, before starting a firm named Capricorn Graphics that printed and sold silkscreened posters, and provided artwork to magazines.
This company was wound up shortly after he was accepted by the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art to do a stage management course. After this, he started a fashion company making clothes designed by Jean Colette Seel, and got a job as an assistant stage-manager at the Open Space Theatre in Tottenham Court Road. Soon after this theatre was closed down, he was hired as stage manager at the Half Moon Theatre in East London, where he wrote his first play – an adaptation of A Christmas Carol – by Charles Dickens, which sparked an interest in writing plays, which he had hitherto avoided because watching his mother’s suffering as a playwright had put him off.
For the next two years, he went on the dole to study playwrighting, and wrote several short plays, which were produced at fringe theatres in London, and a full-length play, The Tax Exile, which was presented successfully at the Bush Theatre. His next play was Naked Robots (Royal Shakespeare Company), followed by The Dentist, and Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom (Royal Court), The Paranormalist (Greenwich Theatre), and Susan’s Breasts (Royal Court.)
He was then hired to work on the movies Nineteen Eighty-Four and White Mischief, both directed by Michael Radford, followed by Batman, directed by Tim Burton, after which he spent nine years in Los Angeles working on a wide variety of projects including the movies Cry Baby, Mars Attacks! and The Treat, which he also directed.
On the verge of directing his second feature, he fell ill with Hepatitis C – was given three to five years to live by the doctors – and returned to London.
For the next twenty years, he was ill with Hep C – with symptoms similar to chronic fatigue syndrome – until, in 2018, he was cured thanks to a combination of natural and allopathic medicine.
In 2019, he published a book on the British film industry called Who Killed British Cinema? – co-written with Vinod Mahindru.
In 2021, he plans on releasing Mars Attacks Memoirs based on the 1996 cult classic movie Mars Attacks! Followed by further books called Hollyweird, Griselda, In The Mood, Where Monsters Dwell and many others which are yet to be announced.
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
December 26, 2024
'Mars Attacks Memoirs' by Jonathan Gems and Mila Pops is an intriguing yet frustrating read. Essentially an almost unredacted transcript of four interviews with Hollywood screenwriter Jonathan Gems, conducted by Mila Pops, the book offers a candid look into the mind behind the cult classic film. However, it suffers from significant structural issues and lacks the editorial finesse needed to make it truly compelling.
One of the most glaring issues is the erratic nature of the interviews. Pops often allows Gems to veer off-topic, leading to repetitive discussions and tangential rants. This lack of focus detracts from what could have been a more cohesive narrative. For instance, the first interview delves deeply into the lukewarm reception of 'Mars Attacks!'—a topic that seems more suited for the conclusion of the book. Gems' occasional drift into conspiracy theories, such as alleging a 'deep state' conspiracy against the film, feels more like unfounded speculation than insightful commentary.
Gems' involvement in the actual filming of the movie was minimal, yet Pops persistently probes him about the star actors and their on-set behaviors. Gems' responses are often diplomatic and vague, offering little more than generic praise like "he or she was marvelous, generous, original," which adds little value for the reader. Pops, at times, displays a concerning lack of industry knowledge, resulting in surface-level questions that fail to elicit deeper insights.
Despite these flaws, the book occasionally stumbles upon fascinating tidbits about Hollywood's darker side—the transactional nature of relationships, the frequent abuse and misbehavior by powerful figures, and the frustrating influence of studio executives on creative decisions. Unfortunately, these moments are fleeting, and the next question often jarringly shifts back to trivial matters, missing opportunities to explore these themes further.
The book is in dire need of substantial redaction and perhaps a complete rewrite. Consolidating overlapping topics, improving the structure and coherence, cutting the fluff, and incorporating other perspectives would immensely enhance its readability and depth. As it stands, 'Mars Attacks Memoirs' is a mixed bag—occasionally interesting but ultimately disappointing due to its lack of critical, in-depth questioning and structural integrity.
One of the most glaring issues is the erratic nature of the interviews. Pops often allows Gems to veer off-topic, leading to repetitive discussions and tangential rants. This lack of focus detracts from what could have been a more cohesive narrative. For instance, the first interview delves deeply into the lukewarm reception of 'Mars Attacks!'—a topic that seems more suited for the conclusion of the book. Gems' occasional drift into conspiracy theories, such as alleging a 'deep state' conspiracy against the film, feels more like unfounded speculation than insightful commentary.
Gems' involvement in the actual filming of the movie was minimal, yet Pops persistently probes him about the star actors and their on-set behaviors. Gems' responses are often diplomatic and vague, offering little more than generic praise like "he or she was marvelous, generous, original," which adds little value for the reader. Pops, at times, displays a concerning lack of industry knowledge, resulting in surface-level questions that fail to elicit deeper insights.
Despite these flaws, the book occasionally stumbles upon fascinating tidbits about Hollywood's darker side—the transactional nature of relationships, the frequent abuse and misbehavior by powerful figures, and the frustrating influence of studio executives on creative decisions. Unfortunately, these moments are fleeting, and the next question often jarringly shifts back to trivial matters, missing opportunities to explore these themes further.
The book is in dire need of substantial redaction and perhaps a complete rewrite. Consolidating overlapping topics, improving the structure and coherence, cutting the fluff, and incorporating other perspectives would immensely enhance its readability and depth. As it stands, 'Mars Attacks Memoirs' is a mixed bag—occasionally interesting but ultimately disappointing due to its lack of critical, in-depth questioning and structural integrity.
June 12, 2023
Jonathan Gems is such an amazing storyteller, having been one of the highest paid screenwriters of the 90’s in Hollywood. This compilation of interviews reads more like a novel than just interviews. His experience in Hollywood and generous sharing of his life and work with Tim Burton and his then girlfriend Lisa Marie as well as stars behind the scenes takes us on a journey which is as crazy and fascinating as Mars Attacks! movie itself. It reveals why this film was so poorly marketed. Extremely underrated film with a great critique of society. Mr Gems not only shows how the Hollywood propaganda works and censors real art but shares his life wisdom and takes us in many directions. Younger people could benefit especially if going through existential crisis. Mila Pop is a really good interviewer, leading Mr Gems to show the world what a great Gem 💎 he is, share his experiences, wisdom and leaves us wanting more. I wish this book became a movie. Tim Burton is a really great guy, you feel like you’re with him through this story. Very much recommended! 10 stars
February 7, 2023
(Actually the audiobook version; no entry for audiobook).
Audiobook is 6 1/2 hours, which at first glance, might seem to be a bit too much for one movie; but this is 4 interview sessions (book/e-books are transcriptions) and luckily, Gems is a very engaging speaker - MARS ATTACKS! is the main subject, but there are tangents on other projects of his career, which film students/aspiring screenwriters will find invaluable. Not as enamored with the interviewer, at least in the audiobook - if I were reading it, I probably wouldn't be as irked.
It also helps that as informative as it is, it's plenty dishy as well. Fans of the movie will eat this up, but it's approachable for laypeople too.
Audiobook is 6 1/2 hours, which at first glance, might seem to be a bit too much for one movie; but this is 4 interview sessions (book/e-books are transcriptions) and luckily, Gems is a very engaging speaker - MARS ATTACKS! is the main subject, but there are tangents on other projects of his career, which film students/aspiring screenwriters will find invaluable. Not as enamored with the interviewer, at least in the audiobook - if I were reading it, I probably wouldn't be as irked.
It also helps that as informative as it is, it's plenty dishy as well. Fans of the movie will eat this up, but it's approachable for laypeople too.
February 9, 2023
Insightful and valuable BTS monograph; primarily preproduction (and marketing/distribution) memoir — author readily acknowledges his scant presence throughout Mars Attacks! location production.
J.G on studio interference (— which I vaguely recall director, John Huston initially volleyed)…
Excerpt From: Mars Attacks Memoirs by Jonathan Gems & Mila Pop. Pp. 205
J.G on studio interference (— which I vaguely recall director, John Huston initially volleyed)…
There are three guys lost in the desert. A pilot, co-pilot, and studio executive. It’s very hot and they’ve been wandering forever, and it’s getting hotter and hotter, and they’re very, very thirsty. They’re dehydrating. And the pilot sees a can of beer in the sand. They can’t believe it. They’re saved! The pilot picks up the can, pops the top and says, ‘This is great. We’ll all share it.’ And the studio executive says, ‘Okay, but wait a second. let me piss in it first.’
Excerpt From: Mars Attacks Memoirs by Jonathan Gems & Mila Pop. Pp. 205
September 22, 2023
A Fun Read
This is not only an interesting recounting of the making of MARS ATTACKS! but also an in-depth observation of how the machinery of movie making works...warts and all. You'll enjoy!
This is not only an interesting recounting of the making of MARS ATTACKS! but also an in-depth observation of how the machinery of movie making works...warts and all. You'll enjoy!
December 26, 2024
Fun but slow
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews