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Rough Love #1-5
Learn the Rules
Learn the Rules contains the first five parts of the Rough Love series, collected in one book for the first time. **PAPERBACK BONUS: the paperback version of Learn the Rules includes the exclusive extra Safe Word .**
1. Bound by Him
Benjamin Ballard always assumed he was straight - in every way possible. They invented the term 'vanilla' to describe him. But if Ben's so straight, why can't he get his inscrutable coffee-shop co-worker Xander Romano out of his head? And how come Xander's rough-housing on the basketball court gets Ben so flustered?
2. Taken by Him
Xander knows the games he likes to play can have unexpected consequences…but he thought he had everything under control. Sure, Ben’s constant questions get on his last nerve sometimes, but Xander knows he means well. Ben’s just new to the world of kink. Exploring. Experimenting.
That’s all it is, Xander’s sure.
And then one day, everything blows up in his face.
3. Dared by Him
Xander Romano's career is looking up, and his personal life is too, for once. But when a figure from his past shows up at a party, how will it affect what he and Ben have been building together?
4. Marked by Him
Ben Ballard doesn't believe any scene with Xander could get truly scary. He knows Xander, and he knows Xander would never really hurt him. Xander might play at being the Big Bad Wolf, but underneath, he's a big softie.
Right?
Find out what happens when Xander blows the house down...
5. Loved by Him
Ben Ballard has found his balance again after a difficult few days. Even better, he knows he has a boyfriend who loves him, a career that's finally starting to go places, and a family that accepts him for who he is.
The only problem? Said boyfriend, Xander Romano, has to move across the country to New York for work, while Ben is stuck in LA.
And on top of all that, Xander's poisonous ex turns up at his going away party...
Will Ben and Xander be able to make sure their love sticks, even from opposite sides of a continent?
Extra: Safe Word
Safe words are fundamental to any healthy kinky relationship.
Ben Ballard knows this.
So why can’t he bring himself to use his?
Safe Word is a 10,000-word extra exploring the first time Ben called ‘Odyssey’ on Xander Romano…and why it took him so long.
***
Learn the Rules contains the first five parts of the Rough Love series. Join Ben and Xander in their continuing odyssey of self-discovery, experimentation, and steamy fun as they work out the kinks together. This is just the beginning of their wild - and sometimes dark - ride, but never fear: these two will get their HEA. It'll just take them some time to figure out what that happy ending looks like for them...
Rough Love can be rough. Please proceed with caution if you have any triggers.
1. Bound by Him
Benjamin Ballard always assumed he was straight - in every way possible. They invented the term 'vanilla' to describe him. But if Ben's so straight, why can't he get his inscrutable coffee-shop co-worker Xander Romano out of his head? And how come Xander's rough-housing on the basketball court gets Ben so flustered?
2. Taken by Him
Xander knows the games he likes to play can have unexpected consequences…but he thought he had everything under control. Sure, Ben’s constant questions get on his last nerve sometimes, but Xander knows he means well. Ben’s just new to the world of kink. Exploring. Experimenting.
That’s all it is, Xander’s sure.
And then one day, everything blows up in his face.
3. Dared by Him
Xander Romano's career is looking up, and his personal life is too, for once. But when a figure from his past shows up at a party, how will it affect what he and Ben have been building together?
4. Marked by Him
Ben Ballard doesn't believe any scene with Xander could get truly scary. He knows Xander, and he knows Xander would never really hurt him. Xander might play at being the Big Bad Wolf, but underneath, he's a big softie.
Right?
Find out what happens when Xander blows the house down...
5. Loved by Him
Ben Ballard has found his balance again after a difficult few days. Even better, he knows he has a boyfriend who loves him, a career that's finally starting to go places, and a family that accepts him for who he is.
The only problem? Said boyfriend, Xander Romano, has to move across the country to New York for work, while Ben is stuck in LA.
And on top of all that, Xander's poisonous ex turns up at his going away party...
Will Ben and Xander be able to make sure their love sticks, even from opposite sides of a continent?
Extra: Safe Word
Safe words are fundamental to any healthy kinky relationship.
Ben Ballard knows this.
So why can’t he bring himself to use his?
Safe Word is a 10,000-word extra exploring the first time Ben called ‘Odyssey’ on Xander Romano…and why it took him so long.
***
Learn the Rules contains the first five parts of the Rough Love series. Join Ben and Xander in their continuing odyssey of self-discovery, experimentation, and steamy fun as they work out the kinks together. This is just the beginning of their wild - and sometimes dark - ride, but never fear: these two will get their HEA. It'll just take them some time to figure out what that happy ending looks like for them...
Rough Love can be rough. Please proceed with caution if you have any triggers.
296 pages, Paperback
First published September 6, 2019
681 people are currently reading
1177 people want to read
About the author
Leighton Greene
45 books372 followersLeighton Greene has been writing stories since she was old enough to hold a pencil. Her first book was a choose-your-own-adventure style book about deciding what to eat for breakfast. It didn't shake the New York Times bestseller list, but she still has a copy of it.
After spending some time writing in academia, fanfiction and corporate reporting, Leighton decided she should probably do what she actually wanted to do, which was to write commercial fiction. So she did. She writes gay romance and, when the mood strikes, erotica as L.J. Greene.
Leighton lives with her partner and her cockatiel on the east coast of Australia.
(Source: Amazon.com)
After spending some time writing in academia, fanfiction and corporate reporting, Leighton decided she should probably do what she actually wanted to do, which was to write commercial fiction. So she did. She writes gay romance and, when the mood strikes, erotica as L.J. Greene.
Leighton lives with her partner and her cockatiel on the east coast of Australia.
(Source: Amazon.com)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 123 reviews
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March 30, 2020
4.5 stars!
I thoroughly enjoyed these guys and their love story. I went in with moderate expectations of a steamy but shallow BDSM title. At first it took a few pages to be at home with the style of narration, but soon I was completely won over by the wonderful characterization, and the excellent drive of the plot.
I have to say this pair of MCs were highly memorable, each one of them on their own. I find that quality unusual, and what I always hope to find in a romance novel but rarely do. Here they are. Benjamin with his initial questioning and inquisitive mind, finding his feet and becoming someone else's rock. The slightly more experienced Xander, still in his early 20s, at first so calm and collected but gradually revealing deep rooted self-doubts. Even the details of the couple's background stories as newbies in Hollywood worked really well.
The writing style and narration might not be for everyone, but for those it works for, this erotic romance is an absolute treat.
I thoroughly enjoyed these guys and their love story. I went in with moderate expectations of a steamy but shallow BDSM title. At first it took a few pages to be at home with the style of narration, but soon I was completely won over by the wonderful characterization, and the excellent drive of the plot.
I have to say this pair of MCs were highly memorable, each one of them on their own. I find that quality unusual, and what I always hope to find in a romance novel but rarely do. Here they are. Benjamin with his initial questioning and inquisitive mind, finding his feet and becoming someone else's rock. The slightly more experienced Xander, still in his early 20s, at first so calm and collected but gradually revealing deep rooted self-doubts. Even the details of the couple's background stories as newbies in Hollywood worked really well.
The writing style and narration might not be for everyone, but for those it works for, this erotic romance is an absolute treat.
March 21, 2020
With one playful spank from Xander, Ben’s life turns upside down and will never be the same.
He nags Xander to experience with him. After being first reluctant Xander finally gives in.
That is the beginning of something surprisingly diverse like, hot, sweet, funny, demanding, painful, endearing, heartwarming, heartbreaking, loving, mind-blowing and did I say painful...?
What started as a mild breeze ends in a mind-blowing hurricane. I sat on the edge of my chair.
I loved the build-up. It was a tremendously written story. I was soooo smitten by the whole concept. Besides the BDSM part there blooms something special, something precious between them! My heart! Besides the amazingly build up it has deliciously hurt, fun and a lot of beautiful feelings.
First I was a bit anxious it wouldn’t be satisfying because hey it’s BDSM and I’m quite punctual and precise with it. I have to feel the honesty and thank goodness I did feel it. Even if would have loved it when they speak out more openly. It’s a process!
Thank goodness for the vulnerability and the perfect imperfections! (I wrote this down before I read the line)
Believe me when I say: not for the faint of heart.
I do hope to have a chance to read the sequel!
He nags Xander to experience with him. After being first reluctant Xander finally gives in.
That is the beginning of something surprisingly diverse like, hot, sweet, funny, demanding, painful, endearing, heartwarming, heartbreaking, loving, mind-blowing and did I say painful...?
What started as a mild breeze ends in a mind-blowing hurricane. I sat on the edge of my chair.
I loved the build-up. It was a tremendously written story. I was soooo smitten by the whole concept. Besides the BDSM part there blooms something special, something precious between them! My heart! Besides the amazingly build up it has deliciously hurt, fun and a lot of beautiful feelings.
First I was a bit anxious it wouldn’t be satisfying because hey it’s BDSM and I’m quite punctual and precise with it. I have to feel the honesty and thank goodness I did feel it. Even if would have loved it when they speak out more openly. It’s a process!
Thank goodness for the vulnerability and the perfect imperfections! (I wrote this down before I read the line)
Believe me when I say: not for the faint of heart.
I do hope to have a chance to read the sequel!
December 7, 2020
I’ve read several books by Leighton Greene and it always takes a few chapters to get used to her writing style, but once I do the stories flow. I loved Xander and Ben. They are great characters and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
March 15, 2022
This book begins a tight 4-volume series that is one complete arc in self-discovery and BDSM for two fascinating men - (note that the sections of this book were 5 separate novellas, so book 2 - Obey the Rules - may appear as book 6.)
Ben had never really gotten into dating and sex the way some guys did, but he always assumed that was due to not meeting the right girl. Until he finds himself obsessing over his gay co-worker in a coffee shop, in ways he hadn't expected.
Xander is mysterious, gorgeous, a wannabe actor like almost everyone else in the Hollywood minimum-wage crew (except Ben, who wants to be a script writer.) Xander also has a unique edge to him, a darkness and intensity, that should warn Ben away but somehow… doesn't. And when a bit of physical contact during a pick-up game gets Ben flustered, he's willing to experiment a bit. See where it leads. This is LA after all, and half the people he works with are queer. It's no big deal.
What Ben doesn't expect is just how well Xander, and his sadistic pain kink, will rev up Ben's lackluster sex drive. It's a revelation, at once exciting and worrying. Ben has no idea what his limits are, or where his desires might lead. He trusts Xander, who is obsessive about safe words and aftercare, but there's a lot he doesn't know about Xander. There are things that make Xander go intense, and others that make him go silent. There are times when something dark and feral peers out of Xander's eyes and Ben can't decide if he should be more afraid than he is.
And as they explore and experiment, they push deeper into all the aspects of BDSM. How much submission outside the bedroom do they each want? How much right does Ben have to know details about Xander's past? What is good pain, and what is too much? Xander's reluctance to have contact with anyone else in the scene means Ben is isolated, trying to keep his feet under him in a whole new world. And while Xander is loving what they do, he doesn't trust himself and can't believe that things won't go bad, as they always have before.
I read this whole series in one fell swoop, to watch these guys work their way through this relationship to a solid HEA. There is some hard core pain kink here, and exploration of consent. There's an outside world that does not understand or accept consensual violence, and as Xander begins to reach success as an actor, the need to keep everything they do under tight cover is an added stress.
I put an ace-spectrum tag on this, although you could debate that. Ben never claims the label, and you could argue that Xander is simply the first person to ring all his particular kink bells. But the need for deep trust is part of Ben's sexuality, and he clicks some demisexual boxes for me. Both men are interesting characters, both go through a lot of self-discovery, and the moments of disharmony feel natural and not contrived. While physical pain is very much not my kink, it all worked for me, in making me believe that each of these men cared for the other, while striving to find a common ground of desire and trust.
Ben had never really gotten into dating and sex the way some guys did, but he always assumed that was due to not meeting the right girl. Until he finds himself obsessing over his gay co-worker in a coffee shop, in ways he hadn't expected.
Xander is mysterious, gorgeous, a wannabe actor like almost everyone else in the Hollywood minimum-wage crew (except Ben, who wants to be a script writer.) Xander also has a unique edge to him, a darkness and intensity, that should warn Ben away but somehow… doesn't. And when a bit of physical contact during a pick-up game gets Ben flustered, he's willing to experiment a bit. See where it leads. This is LA after all, and half the people he works with are queer. It's no big deal.
What Ben doesn't expect is just how well Xander, and his sadistic pain kink, will rev up Ben's lackluster sex drive. It's a revelation, at once exciting and worrying. Ben has no idea what his limits are, or where his desires might lead. He trusts Xander, who is obsessive about safe words and aftercare, but there's a lot he doesn't know about Xander. There are things that make Xander go intense, and others that make him go silent. There are times when something dark and feral peers out of Xander's eyes and Ben can't decide if he should be more afraid than he is.
And as they explore and experiment, they push deeper into all the aspects of BDSM. How much submission outside the bedroom do they each want? How much right does Ben have to know details about Xander's past? What is good pain, and what is too much? Xander's reluctance to have contact with anyone else in the scene means Ben is isolated, trying to keep his feet under him in a whole new world. And while Xander is loving what they do, he doesn't trust himself and can't believe that things won't go bad, as they always have before.
I read this whole series in one fell swoop, to watch these guys work their way through this relationship to a solid HEA. There is some hard core pain kink here, and exploration of consent. There's an outside world that does not understand or accept consensual violence, and as Xander begins to reach success as an actor, the need to keep everything they do under tight cover is an added stress.
I put an ace-spectrum tag on this, although you could debate that. Ben never claims the label, and you could argue that Xander is simply the first person to ring all his particular kink bells. But the need for deep trust is part of Ben's sexuality, and he clicks some demisexual boxes for me. Both men are interesting characters, both go through a lot of self-discovery, and the moments of disharmony feel natural and not contrived. While physical pain is very much not my kink, it all worked for me, in making me believe that each of these men cared for the other, while striving to find a common ground of desire and trust.
October 9, 2022
I started this book for the sexual awakening plot and I was quickly sucked in by the story’s depth and great characters
Ben is the quintessential All-American straight guy until his friend Xander playfully spanks him. Suddenly he’s feeling.. things.. and he gets Xander to help him explore his newfound kink
I loved these guys together. Ben is adorable with all his internet research, as well as Xander’s amused exasperation with it.
The sex scenes were really hot from the start with Ben’s enthusiasm and Xander’s careful control. Xander letting Ben watch and using Ben’s spit as lube 🔥 Xander branding Ben’s ass 🔥🔥
The kink felt really natural to me. Elaborate setups and role playing are fun but sometimes when I’m reading a scene I think about how it sounds like a lot of work
The relationship developed slowly and naturally from friends with benefits to lovers. It was fun reading about Ben discovering his kink and lovely to see him help Xander fully accept his
Ben is the quintessential All-American straight guy until his friend Xander playfully spanks him. Suddenly he’s feeling.. things.. and he gets Xander to help him explore his newfound kink
I loved these guys together. Ben is adorable with all his internet research, as well as Xander’s amused exasperation with it.
The sex scenes were really hot from the start with Ben’s enthusiasm and Xander’s careful control. Xander letting Ben watch and using Ben’s spit as lube 🔥 Xander branding Ben’s ass 🔥🔥
The kink felt really natural to me. Elaborate setups and role playing are fun but sometimes when I’m reading a scene I think about how it sounds like a lot of work
The relationship developed slowly and naturally from friends with benefits to lovers. It was fun reading about Ben discovering his kink and lovely to see him help Xander fully accept his
August 31, 2023
I think my kink is D/s to lovers.
Because these California boys?
And their thrilled embrace of toys?
Make me read beneath the covers.
Because these California boys?
And their thrilled embrace of toys?
Make me read beneath the covers.
June 1, 2024
These books do really need to be read in order, unless you are only planning to read one. This says it's parts 1-5 but the "parts" aren't very well defined, so it looks and reads like its one story and the beginning felt a bit underplayed and some parts seemed rushed and somewhat confusing. After their first encounter Xander says he’s going to go but only goes into the other room of Ben’s house. I actually went back to the beginning and read to see if I missed the fact they perhaps lived together. It took me well until later in the book to realize that he was staying over because he had had too much to drink, and this was just their routine.
These two characters were really made for one another. It didn't take very long to become invested in them and their relationship and even their growth as individuals. Make no mistake...they were definitely flawed, but truly lovable, each in their own way. They both are young and have a lot of "finding" themselves to do. I began to think they both needed to seek more therapy to work through some of their issues, but their relationship is clearly what they each needed...even if it was on the dangerous side. There were lots of "spicy" scenes, however, I was expecting there to be a little more variety in their play considering some of the conversations that they had in the beginning. For all the talk of Xander being so much into BDSM and pain-play in particular in the beginning, there was very little that was actually explored here.... which might have been a good thing:)
The book could’ve been twice as long with more in-depth exploration into their likes and wants. Some things were hinted at about their childhoods and aspirations, but most was glossed over. The story was a lot more glossed over than most that I've read with BDSM topic. The book or the others in the series will, as with any genera or topic, not be for everyone...but we can't and don't all like the same things.
These two characters were really made for one another. It didn't take very long to become invested in them and their relationship and even their growth as individuals. Make no mistake...they were definitely flawed, but truly lovable, each in their own way. They both are young and have a lot of "finding" themselves to do. I began to think they both needed to seek more therapy to work through some of their issues, but their relationship is clearly what they each needed...even if it was on the dangerous side. There were lots of "spicy" scenes, however, I was expecting there to be a little more variety in their play considering some of the conversations that they had in the beginning. For all the talk of Xander being so much into BDSM and pain-play in particular in the beginning, there was very little that was actually explored here.... which might have been a good thing:)
The book could’ve been twice as long with more in-depth exploration into their likes and wants. Some things were hinted at about their childhoods and aspirations, but most was glossed over. The story was a lot more glossed over than most that I've read with BDSM topic. The book or the others in the series will, as with any genera or topic, not be for everyone...but we can't and don't all like the same things.
January 23, 2022
Intense!
Xander and Ben are best friends but an accidental spanking changes everything.
Ben was straight but Xander turns his life upside down. This is a VERY intense journey of self discovery for Ben. He learns how deep his kink can go. Xander pushes Ben’s limits to the max. Definitely read those trigger warnings.
I’ve read many Leighton Greene books but none like this. This was EPIC. The exploration of kink was SO hot and these characters were so emotional. I’m so excited we get to spend more time with Xander and Ben. See where the end up.
Off to read book 2….
Xander and Ben are best friends but an accidental spanking changes everything.
Ben was straight but Xander turns his life upside down. This is a VERY intense journey of self discovery for Ben. He learns how deep his kink can go. Xander pushes Ben’s limits to the max. Definitely read those trigger warnings.
I’ve read many Leighton Greene books but none like this. This was EPIC. The exploration of kink was SO hot and these characters were so emotional. I’m so excited we get to spend more time with Xander and Ben. See where the end up.
Off to read book 2….
October 9, 2024
Divertido, entretenido, erótico, romántico
Ben no puede creer la atracción que siente por su amigo Xander, y menos por las nalgadas que este le da "jugando". Pero poco a poco lo va aceptando al igual que Xander acepta que puede tener una relación estable con Ben. Deberán aprender a conocerse y aceptarse con todo lo bueno, lo malo y lo feo, y ver hasta donde puede llegar su relación.
Este libro está separado en 5 partes bien definidas, en cada una vemos a nuestra pareja, afrontar y superar un obstáculo en su relación, por lo que los vemos crecer poco a poco y pensar en un futuro juntos. Eso me gustó bastante, el "romance" que es casi un instalove, pero que se desarrollo con el tiempo.
Sin embargo, las personalidades de los Protas se me hicieron insoportables por momentos, sobre todo Ben, quien tenía unos arranques de malcriades y egocentrismo que me molestaban. Además, me hubiera gustado saber que es lo que realmente piensa Xander, y como lucha para superar su inseguridad.
En fin, me gustó bastante, voy a leer el próximo, para ver cómo se desarrolla la relación a larga distancia.
Ben no puede creer la atracción que siente por su amigo Xander, y menos por las nalgadas que este le da "jugando". Pero poco a poco lo va aceptando al igual que Xander acepta que puede tener una relación estable con Ben. Deberán aprender a conocerse y aceptarse con todo lo bueno, lo malo y lo feo, y ver hasta donde puede llegar su relación.
Este libro está separado en 5 partes bien definidas, en cada una vemos a nuestra pareja, afrontar y superar un obstáculo en su relación, por lo que los vemos crecer poco a poco y pensar en un futuro juntos. Eso me gustó bastante, el "romance" que es casi un instalove, pero que se desarrollo con el tiempo.
Sin embargo, las personalidades de los Protas se me hicieron insoportables por momentos, sobre todo Ben, quien tenía unos arranques de malcriades y egocentrismo que me molestaban. Además, me hubiera gustado saber que es lo que realmente piensa Xander, y como lucha para superar su inseguridad.
En fin, me gustó bastante, voy a leer el próximo, para ver cómo se desarrolla la relación a larga distancia.
Read
September 20, 2024This was likable fluff, and I stopped reading exactly as soon as I got bored. DNF @ 47%.
January 31, 2023
Ben feels his heart hammering in his chest, and is surprised to find he’s terrified. It’s almost like falling in love.
RE-READ 2023. 4.5 stars. I didn't adore this quite as much as I did on my first read, but I could see clearly all the reasons why I did fall for this romance so much. Friends-to-lovers in the best way possible, with a lot of exploration and kink and negotiation and meaningful interrogation of the characters' personalities and likes and tastes. Knowing that the writing will delve even deeper into their psyches makes me more excited, and I'm glad I decided to do a reread before I continue the series. The writing is just so easy and quick to get behind, and I'm super fond of these characters.
--
“You owned your needs, when they could have become something twisted inside of you. Refined the gold from the dross.”
4.5 stars. I DO love when I get an unexpected winner like this. I picked this up yesterday as a freebie and decided on a whim to start it right away, to counteract my habit of getting free books and then leaving them to gather dust. I love this so much! A kinky friends to lovers romance about a guy who's always assumed he was straight exploring kink and a relationship with his friend/co-worker.
Ben and Xander work at a coffee shop in LA and they're both trying to break into Hollywood; Ben as a writer and Xander as an actor. They've known each other for years, and after some playful roughhousing gets Ben thinking, they slowly embark on some exploration and a relationship (reluctantly at first, on Xander's part). This is the kind of book that's like 90% focused on the relationship and romance, and usually I'd prefer a bit more of a well-rounded story, with more insight into their jobs and lives and families etc, but this actually worked for me. Partially because what we did see of their outer lives was interesting and not badly developed, and you can tell it'll play a bigger role later on. But mostly because I love how the book directed its focus on their exploration and deepening relationship. There was a fair amount of sex, yes, but so much conversation and communication and banter. It was so good! Friends to lovers excellence! I smiled and laughed out loud so much! You see all the reasons why they worked as friends, and all the reasons why it works when they pursue romance. I adored how they each peeled back the others' layers: Xander teaching Ben through practice and experience, showing him that not everything can be read about, and Ben getting Xander to slowly open up, start to come to terms with his insecurities and feel like less of a monster. Even when the kink gets really heavy (and it was a lot; I can't say I enjoyed everything about it) they have such a strong emotional centre that made my heart so full. Also, there were some aptly used poetry quotes that made me want to freaking cry.
This ends on a sorta HFN, and I'm eager to come back to the series in the future and see how they grow and love each other even more! Such a great, really sexy romance.
Content warnings:
Looking at Xander, Ben is pretty sure he’s found his direction. Due north, towards the Icy Bear.
January 31, 2021
Holy shit this was some delicious BDSM smut that turned out to have some nice characterization and had me falling head over heels for these guys by the end.
There were some inconsistencies in the first part that had me a little worried, but I'm glad I didn't let those minor details scare me off. Especially since the rest of the books in this series got even better.
High-quality erotica that turns into something more. Highly recommended if you like that kind of thing
There were some inconsistencies in the first part that had me a little worried, but I'm glad I didn't let those minor details scare me off. Especially since the rest of the books in this series got even better.
High-quality erotica that turns into something more. Highly recommended if you like that kind of thing
July 23, 2023
Well-written bi- and kink-awakening that is intense and absorbing. Part yum, part yikes.
Thanks to Kirsten for the rec!
Thanks to Kirsten for the rec!
abandonados
September 17, 2024La primera novela de Rough Love: Learn the rules está dividida en 5 partes ➡️ La primera nos presenta a Benjamin Ballard y Alexander Romano y su recién descubierta nueva atracción sexual.
Benjamin Ballard y Alexander Romano viven en Los Ángeles (EE.UU) y trabajan juntos en una cafetería desde hace dos años. Ambos son colegas, se llevan bien, juegan con la pandilla al baloncesto 🏀 y con la pandilla de la cafetería ven mensualmente películas 🎥, les gusta ver y comentar Star Trek, 2001: Odisea en el espacio, y comparten todos un sueño: triunfar en el mundo del entretenimiento. Ben aspira a escribir ✍️ guiones de comedias (aunque en realidad le apasiona el teatro y la poesía) y Xander quiere interpretar todo tipo de papeles 🎭 (para lo que tiene un pelo con el que convertirse en un galán de los 90 o en un ganster). Ambos se consideran amigos porque saben que comparten las mismas metas pero no son íntimos.
Una tarde, tras un partido de baloncesto, Xander azota el culo de Ben ante la pandilla, lo que causa la risa de todos, Ben también se ríe pero por dentro siente vergüenza y mucha excitación sexual. Debido a ese estímulo, su cabeza se llena de fantasías sexuales de Xander y de spanking, al principio él intenta negarlo, intenta creer que es solo un nuevo gusto por los azotes pero no un gusto por Xander pero pensar en Xander mientras se masturba y pensar en Xander en su cama le hace jadear muy fuerte. Entiendo que tiene que ser una locura que un estímulo pueda hacer que se lo cuestione todo, que su cabeza tiene que ser un caos y que pueda caer en esos intentos de negación (aunque es feo los comentarios que hace).
Xander y Ben comienzan a explorar su relación a lo largo de los meses, intentando descubrir que quieren de la relación, escuchando y preguntando al otro que es lo que busca en el sexo, en el placer, en el dolor, los dos se escuchan y exploran la nueva energía sexual que les rodea. Las respuestas son complejas, lo que ambos necesitan en una relación es difícil y me estallaba la cabeza porque no concibo así las cosas, sus necesidades me resultan incómodas (la necesidad de Xander de hacer daño y la de Ben de excitarse con ello), lo mismo que sus confesiones, Xander no siempre se aceptó tal y como era, sino que se cuestionó a si mismo y se preguntó si era un psicópata, llegar a encontrar la paz consigo mismo y con su sexualidad llegó con el tiempo, lo mismo que perfeccionar su autocontrol para no hacer un verdadero daño a sus parejas debido a sus necesidades, esto me resulta difícil de entender pero así es Xander y Ben está feliz de poder conocer mejor a Xander. Xander busca que Ben esté cómodo en la nueva relación y nunca acelera porque no quiere hacer nada con lo que Ben no se sienta a gusto, todo lo dialoga y es consentido, para la autora es muy importante dialogar sobre el consentimiento y hacerlo explícito y manifestar que toda relación debe incluir el consentimiento, me parece super bien que dialogue sobre ello y que Xander se tome el tiempo de asegurarse de que Ben consiente y desea todo.
En esta primera parte como Ben y Xander están comenzando a explorar su dinámica las cosas se mantienen bastante suaves y no hubo nada que me incomodara salvo el choking y el power control, Xander quiere que las primeras veces de Ben, aunque tengan elementos de sumisión, sean suaves y eróticas, que sean una transición lenta pero segura a una dinámica diferente del sexo, porque no se olvida de que está explorando la relación con un chico y el bdsm y por eso podréis encontrar mucha exploración sexual (sexo oral con choking, masturbación, manos atadas que se pueden soltar simplemente para poner a prueba si le parecerá bien, spanking con las manos, órdenes, pequeño juego de poder), para ambos funciona muy bien aunque sea un poco frustrante que Ben tenga que pedir permiso para darle un beso a Xander o tocarle el pecho sea saltarse las reglas (para Ben no es frustrante, le encanta ganarse el derecho a ello), para mí esos "no puedes" le quitaban naturalidad pero para ellos les excitaba ese juego de poder. Ambos disfrutaron de su coqueteo, de la sexualidad y se elogieron por ello, se hicieron sentir bien por la intimidad que compartieron y por sus deseos, se escucharon y no se juzgaron. Ben declaró que era Xandersexual y que admiraba mucho a Xander y Xander declaró que la admiración era mutua y que se alegraba de que se hubiera abierto a la posibilidad de cuestionarse a sí mismo (esta última escena me gusta mucho).
Ambos están felices del camino que han iniciado juntos, de ser amigos con beneficios. Yo también quiero que ellos sean felices juntos. Siento que tienen mucho por explorar, ellos quieren explorarlo en la cama y lo entiendo porque todo es novedoso. No es una "pareja" que me haya enamorado, no son dos personajes que me provoquen mucho amor pero espero que algún
día puedan darse todo el cariño que necesitan y anhelan.
Me encantaría que los protagonistas tuvieran más desarrollo, que la historia fuera más tridimensional para que así pudiéramos sentirnos más en su piel y que pudiéramos verlos interaccionar con el resto de personas que forman su mundo porque parece que la historia se reduce al bar y a la habitación de Xander. Esto puede ser algo bueno para quien solo quiere verlos explorarse mutuamente pero también es malo porque satura mucho no tener otras distracciones.
✨MM romance
✨BDSM (choking, spanking, tied up, sadist/masochist, power control)
✨Coworkers / compañeros de trabajo.
✨1 pov, 3 persona (narrado por Ben).
Los personajes "secundarios" son mencionados vagamente por lo que no aportan nada, la pandilla forma parte del mundo artístico, uno de los chicos es pansexual y las mujeres de la familia de Ben son expertas en Psicología, Xander creé en la teoría de Carl Jung y Ben no tiene mucho conocimiento del tema.
PD. Me gustó más la primera vez que lo leí, quizás porque entonces jugaba con el factor de la curiosidad pero aún así siempre ha sido un libro 📖 fuera de mi zona de confort.
Citas:
“I know the difference between fantasy and reality. But all I can think about now when I jerk off is—” Don’t say ‘You’, dumbass! “— uh— guys. So I was just trying to figure things out. But every time I bring it up, you change the damn subject! The only thing you would talk about was kink, and even then you barely talked about that! It’s frustrating, man! You’re my best friend. If I can’t talk to you about this, who the fuck am I supposed to tell?” [Ben]
---
"-But if you want to understand me better, isn’t talking to me directly a better option?" [Xander]
---
"His eyes are glittering like two black suns. Shining just for me, Ben thinks."
---
"Ben kisses him deeply and wants to tell him how brave he thinks he is."
---
“Please— I’m going to—”
“Ask,” Xander corrects.
“May I come?” Ben forces the words through clenched teeth.
“Zero questions left,” Xander tells him. “And yes. I give you permission to make a mess all over my hand.”
---
“You’re my hero,” Ben says.
“Shut up,” Xander laughs, and kisses him.
“No, really,” Ben says.
“I wish I had your courage. (...) I wish I were as open as that.”
Xander contemplates his face. “You are,” he says. “Few people would even consider testing themselves like you have over the last few months. It’s easier to live the way society tells us. But you questioned that.” Xander kisses him again, for a long time. “I’m so glad you did,” he says.
“Actually, I think I’ve worked it out,” Ben tells him. “I’m a Xandersexual.”
Xander bites his shoulder playfully. “You’re so dumb,” he says with affection.
“I mean it,” Ben insists. He laughs and then sighs contentedly. “Xandersexual is enough for now, anyway.”
---
Benjamin Ballard y Alexander Romano viven en Los Ángeles (EE.UU) y trabajan juntos en una cafetería desde hace dos años. Ambos son colegas, se llevan bien, juegan con la pandilla al baloncesto 🏀 y con la pandilla de la cafetería ven mensualmente películas 🎥, les gusta ver y comentar Star Trek, 2001: Odisea en el espacio, y comparten todos un sueño: triunfar en el mundo del entretenimiento. Ben aspira a escribir ✍️ guiones de comedias (aunque en realidad le apasiona el teatro y la poesía) y Xander quiere interpretar todo tipo de papeles 🎭 (para lo que tiene un pelo con el que convertirse en un galán de los 90 o en un ganster). Ambos se consideran amigos porque saben que comparten las mismas metas pero no son íntimos.
Una tarde, tras un partido de baloncesto, Xander azota el culo de Ben ante la pandilla, lo que causa la risa de todos, Ben también se ríe pero por dentro siente vergüenza y mucha excitación sexual. Debido a ese estímulo, su cabeza se llena de fantasías sexuales de Xander y de spanking, al principio él intenta negarlo, intenta creer que es solo un nuevo gusto por los azotes pero no un gusto por Xander pero pensar en Xander mientras se masturba y pensar en Xander en su cama le hace jadear muy fuerte. Entiendo que tiene que ser una locura que un estímulo pueda hacer que se lo cuestione todo, que su cabeza tiene que ser un caos y que pueda caer en esos intentos de negación (aunque es feo los comentarios que hace).
Xander y Ben comienzan a explorar su relación a lo largo de los meses, intentando descubrir que quieren de la relación, escuchando y preguntando al otro que es lo que busca en el sexo, en el placer, en el dolor, los dos se escuchan y exploran la nueva energía sexual que les rodea. Las respuestas son complejas, lo que ambos necesitan en una relación es difícil y me estallaba la cabeza porque no concibo así las cosas, sus necesidades me resultan incómodas (la necesidad de Xander de hacer daño y la de Ben de excitarse con ello), lo mismo que sus confesiones, Xander no siempre se aceptó tal y como era, sino que se cuestionó a si mismo y se preguntó si era un psicópata, llegar a encontrar la paz consigo mismo y con su sexualidad llegó con el tiempo, lo mismo que perfeccionar su autocontrol para no hacer un verdadero daño a sus parejas debido a sus necesidades, esto me resulta difícil de entender pero así es Xander y Ben está feliz de poder conocer mejor a Xander. Xander busca que Ben esté cómodo en la nueva relación y nunca acelera porque no quiere hacer nada con lo que Ben no se sienta a gusto, todo lo dialoga y es consentido, para la autora es muy importante dialogar sobre el consentimiento y hacerlo explícito y manifestar que toda relación debe incluir el consentimiento, me parece super bien que dialogue sobre ello y que Xander se tome el tiempo de asegurarse de que Ben consiente y desea todo.
En esta primera parte como Ben y Xander están comenzando a explorar su dinámica las cosas se mantienen bastante suaves y no hubo nada que me incomodara salvo el choking y el power control, Xander quiere que las primeras veces de Ben, aunque tengan elementos de sumisión, sean suaves y eróticas, que sean una transición lenta pero segura a una dinámica diferente del sexo, porque no se olvida de que está explorando la relación con un chico y el bdsm y por eso podréis encontrar mucha exploración sexual (sexo oral con choking, masturbación, manos atadas que se pueden soltar simplemente para poner a prueba si le parecerá bien, spanking con las manos, órdenes, pequeño juego de poder), para ambos funciona muy bien aunque sea un poco frustrante que Ben tenga que pedir permiso para darle un beso a Xander o tocarle el pecho sea saltarse las reglas (para Ben no es frustrante, le encanta ganarse el derecho a ello), para mí esos "no puedes" le quitaban naturalidad pero para ellos les excitaba ese juego de poder. Ambos disfrutaron de su coqueteo, de la sexualidad y se elogieron por ello, se hicieron sentir bien por la intimidad que compartieron y por sus deseos, se escucharon y no se juzgaron. Ben declaró que era Xandersexual y que admiraba mucho a Xander y Xander declaró que la admiración era mutua y que se alegraba de que se hubiera abierto a la posibilidad de cuestionarse a sí mismo (esta última escena me gusta mucho).
Ambos están felices del camino que han iniciado juntos, de ser amigos con beneficios. Yo también quiero que ellos sean felices juntos. Siento que tienen mucho por explorar, ellos quieren explorarlo en la cama y lo entiendo porque todo es novedoso. No es una "pareja" que me haya enamorado, no son dos personajes que me provoquen mucho amor pero espero que algún
día puedan darse todo el cariño que necesitan y anhelan.
Me encantaría que los protagonistas tuvieran más desarrollo, que la historia fuera más tridimensional para que así pudiéramos sentirnos más en su piel y que pudiéramos verlos interaccionar con el resto de personas que forman su mundo porque parece que la historia se reduce al bar y a la habitación de Xander. Esto puede ser algo bueno para quien solo quiere verlos explorarse mutuamente pero también es malo porque satura mucho no tener otras distracciones.
✨MM romance
✨BDSM (choking, spanking, tied up, sadist/masochist, power control)
✨Coworkers / compañeros de trabajo.
✨1 pov, 3 persona (narrado por Ben).
Los personajes "secundarios" son mencionados vagamente por lo que no aportan nada, la pandilla forma parte del mundo artístico, uno de los chicos es pansexual y las mujeres de la familia de Ben son expertas en Psicología, Xander creé en la teoría de Carl Jung y Ben no tiene mucho conocimiento del tema.
PD. Me gustó más la primera vez que lo leí, quizás porque entonces jugaba con el factor de la curiosidad pero aún así siempre ha sido un libro 📖 fuera de mi zona de confort.
Citas:
“I know the difference between fantasy and reality. But all I can think about now when I jerk off is—” Don’t say ‘You’, dumbass! “— uh— guys. So I was just trying to figure things out. But every time I bring it up, you change the damn subject! The only thing you would talk about was kink, and even then you barely talked about that! It’s frustrating, man! You’re my best friend. If I can’t talk to you about this, who the fuck am I supposed to tell?” [Ben]
---
"-But if you want to understand me better, isn’t talking to me directly a better option?" [Xander]
---
"His eyes are glittering like two black suns. Shining just for me, Ben thinks."
---
"Ben kisses him deeply and wants to tell him how brave he thinks he is."
---
“Please— I’m going to—”
“Ask,” Xander corrects.
“May I come?” Ben forces the words through clenched teeth.
“Zero questions left,” Xander tells him. “And yes. I give you permission to make a mess all over my hand.”
---
“You’re my hero,” Ben says.
“Shut up,” Xander laughs, and kisses him.
“No, really,” Ben says.
“I wish I had your courage. (...) I wish I were as open as that.”
Xander contemplates his face. “You are,” he says. “Few people would even consider testing themselves like you have over the last few months. It’s easier to live the way society tells us. But you questioned that.” Xander kisses him again, for a long time. “I’m so glad you did,” he says.
“Actually, I think I’ve worked it out,” Ben tells him. “I’m a Xandersexual.”
Xander bites his shoulder playfully. “You’re so dumb,” he says with affection.
“I mean it,” Ben insists. He laughs and then sighs contentedly. “Xandersexual is enough for now, anyway.”
---
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 6, 2025
3.5 rounded for the poetry
People said the writing style wasn’t for everyone, but it definitely worked for me. I loved how it let me see their love story unfold step by step, without rushing anything. It was a whole relationship packed into just a little over 200 pages, and I really appreciated how much depth it gave without cramming everything in.
But honestly, the best part for me was the characters. They fit together so perfectly! Benjamin, with his curious, questioning nature, slowly but steadily became the anchor that kept Xander grounded through the storms, and Xander starts off so confident, only for us to discover how much he struggled to get there and see the doubts that occasionally seep through the cracks. Lol, I laugh whenever I Watching them find each other had me doing little happy dances the entire time!
The only complaint I have is the dirty talk. For the first time, it didn’t sit right with me. It wasn’t just dirty or humiliating— it felt mean and personal , and it really hit me the wrong way. It didn’t ruin the book, but it definitely took me out of the moment when it happened.
People said the writing style wasn’t for everyone, but it definitely worked for me. I loved how it let me see their love story unfold step by step, without rushing anything. It was a whole relationship packed into just a little over 200 pages, and I really appreciated how much depth it gave without cramming everything in.
But honestly, the best part for me was the characters. They fit together so perfectly! Benjamin, with his curious, questioning nature, slowly but steadily became the anchor that kept Xander grounded through the storms, and Xander starts off so confident, only for us to discover how much he struggled to get there and see the doubts that occasionally seep through the cracks. Lol, I laugh whenever I Watching them find each other had me doing little happy dances the entire time!
The only complaint I have is the dirty talk. For the first time, it didn’t sit right with me. It wasn’t just dirty or humiliating— it felt mean and personal , and it really hit me the wrong way. It didn’t ruin the book, but it definitely took me out of the moment when it happened.
“He wishes he was as secure as you are. He’s putting on a front to the world; you’re not. He’s frightened of himself. You try to own every part of yourself, even the bits you don’t like.”
Xander is silent for a moment, and then says, “Ballard, you are disturbingly insightful sometimes. I feel like my whole life perspective from the last few years has just shifted.
September 1, 2023
This book is a collection of five serialized novellas showing the evolution of the kink and romantic relationship of Xander and Ben, all from Ben's POV. I really found both characters to be compelling, and Ben's voice was great. In terms of dynamics, this hit all of my buttons, though I will say, in terms of kink, the direction this is going in really is not my thing. I enjoyed that in spite of the more violent slant of the kink, and I thought it was well done. The fact that this is set in LA with both characters trying to break into the industry was a really interesting twist, particularly given the darker kink, and I'm very much curious to see where it goes in the next two volumes. The pacing here is mostly decent, though there's a bit of jumpiness between the novellas that isn't quite ideal when reading them all at once as a singular novel as opposed to a serialized format, but it wasn't a significant detraction.
October 9, 2022
4.5-5
Quote:
Shut your mouth,” Xander murmurs.
„I swear, Benjamin, you get horny
and you lose your fucking mind.”
I can’t comprehend how good this was!
Ben is such an eager boy
I love how he dives into the whole exploration
god praise the internet haha!!
there were no tw/tags except the warning that rough love can be rough, so if you want to go in blin, don’t read my tags. I listed some of the kinks u can find during Ben&Xanders journey
I would rec this for ppl who love kink, kink exploration and aren’t afraid of rough kinks!
there‘s also some relationship angst
and I loved that!!
!! this is book 1 of 4
and I may or may not have already purchased the rest
—
+t2s
+kinktober
Quote:
Shut your mouth,” Xander murmurs.
„I swear, Benjamin, you get horny
and you lose your fucking mind.”
I can’t comprehend how good this was!
Ben is such an eager boy
I love how he dives into the whole exploration
god praise the internet haha!!
there were no tw/tags except the warning that rough love can be rough, so if you want to go in blin, don’t read my tags. I listed some of the kinks u can find during Ben&Xanders journey
I would rec this for ppl who love kink, kink exploration and aren’t afraid of rough kinks!
there‘s also some relationship angst
and I loved that!!
!! this is book 1 of 4
and I may or may not have already purchased the rest
—
+t2s
+kinktober
June 25, 2020
Wonderfully kinky with a lot of depth. Xander and Ben felt very real to me, from their stumbling beginning to their insecurities to their ever-evolving boundaries. They weren’t overly sentimental with each other, which also rang true, but showed their feelings, sometimes begrudgingly, in really heartfelt ways. I’m feeling a little Xandersexual myself.
September 1, 2023
[This review is for the entire series.]
Tags: Contemporary, BDSM, friends to FWB to lovers. Kink and bi-awakening.
OMG, THIS WAS SO GOOD!!! I bought the box set on promo because kinky fun, hell yeah, why not? Little did I know this would be one of the best things I've read in a while. It certainly starts like that: pure fun. Two friends begin a kinky FWB thing, one is an experienced Dom and hardcore sadist, the other is new to everything (kink and bi-awakening). They are both adorable dorks together, and in the beginning there are so many happy and cute vibes and it's such a seemingly healthy dynamic. As the story unfolds and as they get deeper into sadomaquism and D/s, small cracks in the relationship become bigger, and this really becomes a story about the psychological and emotional aspect of kink and about self-awareness. It gets really angsty and dark, especially in book 3. The character growth is so complex and unbelievably good. The journey is really rough and the HEA is hard won, but so worth it. One of my favorite reads of this year. Check CWs.
Tags: Contemporary, BDSM, friends to FWB to lovers. Kink and bi-awakening.
OMG, THIS WAS SO GOOD!!! I bought the box set on promo because kinky fun, hell yeah, why not? Little did I know this would be one of the best things I've read in a while. It certainly starts like that: pure fun. Two friends begin a kinky FWB thing, one is an experienced Dom and hardcore sadist, the other is new to everything (kink and bi-awakening). They are both adorable dorks together, and in the beginning there are so many happy and cute vibes and it's such a seemingly healthy dynamic. As the story unfolds and as they get deeper into sadomaquism and D/s, small cracks in the relationship become bigger, and this really becomes a story about the psychological and emotional aspect of kink and about self-awareness. It gets really angsty and dark, especially in book 3. The character growth is so complex and unbelievably good. The journey is really rough and the HEA is hard won, but so worth it. One of my favorite reads of this year. Check CWs.
May 22, 2021
4.5 stars
This was my first book by this author and I really enjoyed it. The writing style took a minute to get used to, but after that I was hooked. I really liked both Xander and Ben. Boy, do they talk things through. Ben is inquisitive by nature, and Xander is just cautious and wants to make sure he's not crossing any lines that Ben isn't ready for. They do get into some intense BDSM, but it is discussed and planned in advance. It was fun to watch their relationship develop and their love for each other grow. I look forward to reading more about Xander and Ben.
This was my first book by this author and I really enjoyed it. The writing style took a minute to get used to, but after that I was hooked. I really liked both Xander and Ben. Boy, do they talk things through. Ben is inquisitive by nature, and Xander is just cautious and wants to make sure he's not crossing any lines that Ben isn't ready for. They do get into some intense BDSM, but it is discussed and planned in advance. It was fun to watch their relationship develop and their love for each other grow. I look forward to reading more about Xander and Ben.
April 9, 2022
Wow! Just wow! I don't think think I've ever seen pain kink done with this much painstaking detail. Xander's true kink is instilling fear in his partner. The scene where he finally reveals his true self to Ben in the bedroom. Wow! Five stars! I liked both characters. Ben was a bit needy but he was fine, I understood him. I felt this book was overly long. I feel like I was reading it forever. It could have been tightened up a bit. I then realized it was 5 novellas. Still....Onto part 6!
March 24, 2020
Xander and Ben have been good friends until a simple misunderstanding brings their friendship to a halt. Ben has always thought he was straight until Xander’s roughhousing on the basketball court begins to give Ben different ideas. Can the two find their way back to where they started, or will this begin a new chapter in their lives?
his is an engaging story about two men finding their way towards a happy ending. I enjoyed being along for the ride as Ben figured out just what he enjoys and what he wants. Xander is a good man with a healthy appetite that tends to scare off others, but it seems that Ben just might be the right man for him. It was sweet to see the way their relationship grows. As they find their way Ban and Xander grow closer and the trust deepens. This was a nice introduction to these two men, and I enjoyed seeing how their relationship started and am eager to see where it will go from here. The author does a good job of bringing these characters and their emotions to life. I was pulled into the story right from the start and entertained all the way to the end and eager for more.
November 19, 2021
The writing is deceptively simple at first, and I was worried I was reading yet another m/m novel that seemed written by a sixteen-year-old. But that first impression was totally wrong; the author is just good at providing the right level of details at the right time. I was sucked in and quickly liked both characters. Personally, it was a little too dark for me in the last third or so, but that's a totally personal preference. Some people like the darker side of BDSM. I like lighter reading.
November 28, 2021
I’m always fascinated by the psychological issues in romance books. This one deals with the sadist and the masochist and to the extent they can explain it, why they are like the way they are. But holy hell, character development. Also: this book popped my cherry for knife play, so there’s that. While I wouldn’t call this a dark book, there is very rough play as in the title. I found it superb. Third person present tense, one POV.
March 19, 2020
wow.. this was sexy and hott.. and it was amazing and interesting.. i wasnt expecting some spots and i loved it all.. so much fun.. parts of this will probably not be others cuppa tea but for me i loved it. it was wonderful
Read
January 2, 2022DNF @ 40%. Bored.
December 29, 2022
This was originally a serial, and I think it shows in the pacing. Fairly enjoyable regardless.
Read
April 4, 2023DNF @ 74%
TW: knife-play, assault-play
Yeahhhhhh that was a lot. It’s not bad but not for me lol
TW: knife-play, assault-play
Yeahhhhhh that was a lot. It’s not bad but not for me lol
November 26, 2023
Kinky. This time with knives. Definitely not for everyone.
Want to read
January 30, 2024Very sadistic read.
3.75 stars
This book was not what I was expecting...at all!
Ben and Xaner's evolving relationship goes way past normal. What began as a simple pat on Ben's behind turns into something so much more than either man dreamed of. And in this reader's opinion, not in a healthy way.
I cannot divulge the plot without revealing the major storylines.
I can say this: TRIGGER WARNINGS!!
Knife play, cutting, bondage, major heat, sado-masicism, physical and mental abuse, biting, doctor visit, blood, alcohol abuse and "flying."
3.75 stars
This book was not what I was expecting...at all!
Ben and Xaner's evolving relationship goes way past normal. What began as a simple pat on Ben's behind turns into something so much more than either man dreamed of. And in this reader's opinion, not in a healthy way.
I cannot divulge the plot without revealing the major storylines.
I can say this: TRIGGER WARNINGS!!
Knife play, cutting, bondage, major heat, sado-masicism, physical and mental abuse, biting, doctor visit, blood, alcohol abuse and "flying."
Displaying 1 - 30 of 123 reviews