At War With My Mind

by Rachael Hollwey

Having kept diaries throughout my enduring battle with Anorexia Nervosa and depression, this is the greatest insight into mental health illness. It captures what the voice was telling me inside my mind, what it is like to live in a psychiatric hospital for a year at a time, to be a subject in a scientific study, and how I kept fighting my way out of the darkest places to finally reach a full recovery.I also share the eye-opening experience of volunteering in Ghana. At a time of wellness, but knowing the demons would soon come back for me, I wanted to do something good with my life and be of help to others for a change.I survived against the odds, but I lost many on the way. So now I use the gift of being alive to raise awareness, to educate, to stop anyone suffering the way I did and to give hope to those who are.

186 pages, Paperback

Published April 10, 2021

Reviews

[Amanda Calleja · Rating 4 out of 5]

How can a beautiful young lady, who seemingly has everything, see a monster in the mirror, so hideous that she has to torture herself to control it? This book can give you an idea of what a person suffering from eating disorders goes through, and it's only an idea, because only the author and those who have been through this can understand the severity of the experience. This is a raw account of a person struggling, so those who are sensitive can be warned of triggers. This young girl gives a clear depiction of mental illness in general, of how the mind can also become sick and is in need of treatment, despite the physique of the person might be showing otherwise. It ached to read how many times the author reached out for help and was turned down. It is already difficult for a person struggling to actually ask for help, and then it's utterly discouraging that when you do, your voice is not heard. Yet it is extremely admirable that the author never stopped believing that recovery is possible and she kept trying everything in order to live. I am glad that she had quiet a good support system, unfortunately, not the same can be said to others as it is known that such disorders are not properly understood, sometimes dismissed as attention-seeking behaviour and not all countries have the appropriate resources for treatment. I hope that this book creates awareness about unseen disabilities, mental illnesses that are frequently masked by a seemingly healthy body.

[Nero · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rachael Hollwey does a great job of portraying how living through the illness feels. The book is honest, raw and emotional, it’s a breath of fresh air among all the romanticizing of eating disorders in modern media. It shows the truth, the cries, the suffering, portrays anorexia nervosa as an actual illness not a quirky thing that teenagers make up for attention. Let’s hope for more representation like this in the future!

[Charlene Vella · Rating 5 out of 5]

Raw and honest

[Bledvar Albekell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Needs proofreading otherwise really raw and emotionally triggering

[Nora]

Really strong, well written, thought provoking