This Hoe Got Roaches In Her Crib: An Urban Satire

by Quan Millz

Austin Watkins, 35 and a single father, finds himself in a precarious situation. Currently locked up in Chicago's Cook County Jail, he knows that Fredquisha, the trifling mother of his only daughter, is a despicable, careless and reckless THOT who is the antithesis of caring, loving black motherhood.Wanting to see her son gain full redemption from his current situation, Delores Watkins, better known as Mrs. Watkins, is also hellbent on rescuing Austin's six-year-old daughter, Myyah, from the clutches of relentless psychological, emotional and physical abuse she suffers at the hands of Fredquisha. Hoping her son works hard to change the course of his life for the betterment of his daughter, Mrs. Watkins explores the possibility of challenging Fredquisha's custody of Myyah. But as she navigates the complex, red-tape filled bureaucracy of child welfare services, Mrs. Watkins decides to take things in her own hand and is willing to put her life on the line for the salvation of her granddaughter. Fredquisha Pierce, a native of the dangerous Englewood, Chicago, could give a two sh!ts about the welfare of her daughter. Her mission in life is simple. Get money, smoke good weed and ride bomb d--k. Nothing more, nothing less. After meeting a potential new bae, Fredquisha needs to make some lifestyle changes so she can upgrade her section 8 squalor living situation. However, a looming pregnancy threatens to unravel her plans for a big come up.This book is another episodic chronicle born out of the dark, gritty, social drama storytelling talent of urban fiction mastermind QUAN MILLZ. THIS HOE GOT ROACHES IN HER CRIB will deliver a gut-punching blow to those who don't understand the many trials and tribulations single fathers go through to rescue their children from manipulative ratchet women who use the family court system to their advantage.-This is a work of satirical fiction that could be described as a dark comedy combined with social commentary. In no way do the descriptions of the characters reflect my personal feelings or beliefs in regards to those of African descent, particularly Black women. The stereotypes employed in the book are deliberate in that I attempt to cast a light on the state of contemporary urban pulp fiction.

376 pages, Paperback

Published April 10, 2021

Reviews

[Matthew Brown · Rating 4 out of 5]

This has been a prime example of do not judge a book by its cover! To sit down and actually read this book was an adventure. If you’ve watched shows like The Have and Have Nots or other urban drama series, you will enjoy this book. The title is just the tip of the iceberg as it relates to the humor , drama, in depth characters, and more. I was skeptical due to the total and cover but Quan Millz has truly entertained me with an engaging plot line, comedic satire and overall well ranged plot. Don’t be surprised if you find me reading another one of his books in the near future 😎😎👀👀🔥🔥📚📚 kudos to you Quan Milllz you’ve gained another fan 😂😭

[miller · Rating 3 out of 5]

The grammar mistakes made it better this man was actually writing testaments

[Daniel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Like everyone else, I went into this book thinking that it was going to be a parallel of stories about Fredquisha’s disgusting hoe adventures and the serious story about Austin in prison.

This was not how it ended up, the first few chapters were about the disgusting apartment Fredquisha and Austin’s daughter and her two other sons lived in, but once the daughter was picked up by her grandma, Austin’s mother, the story took a big turn towards the genuineness of the daughter’s situation and her relationship with her father and grandmother, and her fear for her mother Fredquisha with only a couple more disgusting moments happening that weren’t relevant to the story.

I was not able to put this book down as each chapter was decently short and kept you wanting to know what happens next.

My only complaints with this book are that the gross sex scenes were mostly unnecessary but they did add to showing how disgusting Fredquisha is. My only other complaints are that there are multiple noticeable spelling and grammar mistakes, but for a book that is not properly published you can only expect so much. And my last complaint is that the characters seem a little flat and can mostly predict what they’re going to do but that didn’t stop this book from having a great story.

If you have the opportunity, just read it.

[Krystal Ayers · Rating 2 out of 5]

Goodness gracious, this book was allllll over the place! The title... Heaven help us, it's hilarious and the reason I even read this book. There were indeed roaches in this book and they seemed sentient in a way where the author actually gave them mini sections. TOOOO much! While this was poorly written in regards to editing, so many mistakes and mistypes, there were some good lessons and deep down, a good message to pull out. It touched on how the CPS system is in dire needs to a reboot, as the child ended up dying from a roach bite because she was sent out of a loving environment, back to a bad one. It touched on how a man can leave jail and turn his life around. He lost his child, one he was working so hard to get out of jail for, and that was truly sad. Who knows if some of the things said in this book are accurate. Can you get meningitis from a roach bite? It was definitely a funny, filthy book, but entertaining none the less.

[DankBurb · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am actually annoyed I spent the last day and a half reading this book. I saw good reviews for it all over social media, that it'd be a "good commentary on poverty in black America" and sure, I guess you could say that. There were so many mistakes I could hardly follow along. Not simple mistakes either, random characters had their names change in the middle of the scene (Patricia became Patrice and then back to Patricia) and characters that weren't supposed to be there were there (why is an inmate in jail 2 sentences again suddenly sitting on the couch in his mom's house? Spoiler: he wasn't, the author just kept mixing the characters up).
These mistakes happened so often, I actually asked myself multiple times "is this written by Al? This has to be Al" because it either was, or this man self-published a book he didn't bother to proofread or revise once.

[Michael · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’ve read a fair amount of Quan and this is one of his worst honestly. Old Thot Next Door is far superior to this.

The characters you’re supposed to root for (Austin and the Watkins family) are incredibly insufferable, snobbish characters. Despite everything that goes wrong being their own fault. It honestly was a chore to read through their chapters.

Fredquisha and her mother Evelyn were the true stars of this book. Their chapters were fun, vibrant and chaotic. The smut chapters in this book are very few, but when they did happen, they were so much fun. I really loved the early side stories for the roaches too and wish they’d continued.

Overall, it was just okay. I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone.

[Brayden Todd · Rating 4 out of 5]

I could not recap this book properly if I tried, much less explain how the theme was portrayed through the book. Each chapter is shock, each chapter is whiplash, each chapter is pure bliss. Please read this book. Start book clubs with this book. Just fair warning, I believe that any trigger warning that has been or ever will be created not only exists in this book, but is a prominent plot point and focus to push the story forward. 8/10

[Nikki Lyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

book made me fr sob on my patio. quan millz, you are too good.

[Brady Weber · Rating 3 out of 5]

Outline would’ve helped. Was about 100 pages too long.