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Margie Majors: Middle-Aged Vampire Slayer #1
The High School Reunion From Hell
All Margie Majors ever wanted was the mythical American dream she was taught to want: a hard-working husband, a house in a place that had neighborhood BBQs, a white picket fence, two kids, and a dog. Instead, she got “destiny.” Hers was to be a plus-sized, day-drinking, foul-mouthed, bisexual, retired vampire slayer with crushing debt and no idea what to do with the rest of her life.
The hard-working husband: Separated.
The house: For Sale.
The BBQ: Not enough alcohol in the world.
The dog: A vampire pitbull named Vlad the Impaler because he humps everything in sight.
The two kids: One smart-mouthed stepdaughter named Ryder who… who is actually pretty great.
But the rest sucks.
And with her twenty-fifth class reunion coming up and nothing to show for it, what’s a retired vampire slayer to do? Nothing out of the ordinary. Step in crap like she always does by dancing with her soon to be ex-husband in the high-school gym, literally tripping over a dead body, and making out with a pretty vampire who was once her arch-enemy, and who is most likely the killer.
The hard-working husband: Separated.
The house: For Sale.
The BBQ: Not enough alcohol in the world.
The dog: A vampire pitbull named Vlad the Impaler because he humps everything in sight.
The two kids: One smart-mouthed stepdaughter named Ryder who… who is actually pretty great.
But the rest sucks.
And with her twenty-fifth class reunion coming up and nothing to show for it, what’s a retired vampire slayer to do? Nothing out of the ordinary. Step in crap like she always does by dancing with her soon to be ex-husband in the high-school gym, literally tripping over a dead body, and making out with a pretty vampire who was once her arch-enemy, and who is most likely the killer.
194 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 4, 2021
48 people are currently reading
78 people want to read
About the author
Saranna DeWylde
87 books705 followersSaranna De Wylde has always been fascinated by things better left in the dark. She wrote her first story after watching The Exorcist at a slumber party. Since then, she’s published horror, romance and narrative nonfiction. Like all writers, Saranna has held a variety of jobs, from operations supervisor for an airline, to an assistant for a call girl, to a corrections officer. But like Hemingway said, “Once writing has become your major vice and greatest pleasure, only death can stop it.” So she traded in her cuffs for a full-time keyboard. She loves to hear from her readers.
Saranna writes nonfiction under the name Sara Lunsford. Her memoir about her time as a corrections officer called Sweet Hell on Fire releases Nov 1 from Sourcebooks.
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
May 7, 2021
High school hell all over again
This book reminded me why I don’t do reunions lol it was just all kinds of f**ked up drama and so much more.
This book was a new author for me and I have to say I loved her writing style, her humour, sass and sarcasm shone through in her characters. I love most of her characters except for Marc I have to say he came across as a totally user who only married Margie to take care of his daughter while he traveled the world saving it and now his daughter is grown he dumps Margies butt quick as a wink!!!! He might consider her his best friend but in all honesty if that’s how he treats a friend I’d hate to see how he treats an enemy.
I loved Margies stand in the end and I’m hoping she can really put it behind her and move on to better because she deserves much more than Marc ever gave her.
This book reminded me why I don’t do reunions lol it was just all kinds of f**ked up drama and so much more.
This book was a new author for me and I have to say I loved her writing style, her humour, sass and sarcasm shone through in her characters. I love most of her characters except for Marc I have to say he came across as a totally user who only married Margie to take care of his daughter while he traveled the world saving it and now his daughter is grown he dumps Margies butt quick as a wink!!!! He might consider her his best friend but in all honesty if that’s how he treats a friend I’d hate to see how he treats an enemy.
I loved Margies stand in the end and I’m hoping she can really put it behind her and move on to better because she deserves much more than Marc ever gave her.
September 21, 2021
likes:
—middle-aged bisexual (on page!) vampire slayer
—gay vampire love interest
—lots of murder and mystery
—vampire dogs!!!!
—queer gal slow burn ust-y romance
—funny and silly and a good time
—fast paced quick read
dislikes:
—some editing errors (misspellings, repeated bits of dialogue, etc.)
—misuse of “gaslighting”
—romance between a woman and her high school bully
—i feel like there isn’t much character description??
content/trigger warnings; ableism, divorce, alcohol consumption, murder, blood, kissing, discussions of past bullying, discussions of cheating, physical violence, arophobic language,
rep; marge (mc) is bisexual. brooke (li) is gay. marc (sc) is black. lila jean (sc) is chinese.
—middle-aged bisexual (on page!) vampire slayer
—gay vampire love interest
—lots of murder and mystery
—vampire dogs!!!!
—queer gal slow burn ust-y romance
—funny and silly and a good time
—fast paced quick read
dislikes:
—some editing errors (misspellings, repeated bits of dialogue, etc.)
—misuse of “gaslighting”
—romance between a woman and her high school bully
—i feel like there isn’t much character description??
content/trigger warnings; ableism, divorce, alcohol consumption, murder, blood, kissing, discussions of past bullying, discussions of cheating, physical violence, arophobic language,
rep; marge (mc) is bisexual. brooke (li) is gay. marc (sc) is black. lila jean (sc) is chinese.
May 7, 2021
If you’re looking for a light, easy, absolutely hilarious and brutally honest midlife book – this is definitely the one. I don’t think I quit laughing the entire way through it. This was my first book I’ve read of DeWylde’s, and I really loved her humor. I think the premise of the series is great, and the characters have some great depth and quirks. Like many initial books in a new series, there’s a healthy amount of mystery surrounding Margie’s past, her pending divorce with Marc, and naturally, what the future could hold for her and her family/friends.
It pains me to say, but I wish there was a little less snark & humor, and more focus on enlightening us on more of these mysteries. There’s so much potential that I wish more attention had been given to story development. Because of that, I'd give it a solid 3.5 stars.
Despite all the crazy, it really was a fun and unique story to read. Margie and her team is a fun group and I look forward to reading her future exploits as more books become published.
It pains me to say, but I wish there was a little less snark & humor, and more focus on enlightening us on more of these mysteries. There’s so much potential that I wish more attention had been given to story development. Because of that, I'd give it a solid 3.5 stars.
Despite all the crazy, it really was a fun and unique story to read. Margie and her team is a fun group and I look forward to reading her future exploits as more books become published.
May 10, 2021
I was offered the chance to read this from an author I really like, and I was glad to as it sounded interesting. First off, Margie was a good character even though at times she was a little too wishy-washy for someone who made it to middle-age being an extremely competent vampire slayer. I thought that the premise was an excellent one, and I was happy to get to know the side characters. I like how…well, I must be a little vague as I don’t want to spoil it, but I like how attitudes changed at the reunion about things. LOL! There was a lot of potential in this book, and it shows. However, the execution was not at a hundred percent. However, I did really like this book, and I do want to read the next one. I tend to be a little more lenient on first books so I will round my 3.5 up to four. Recommend.
May 12, 2021
Off to a Good Start . . .
This was an interesting look at some intriguing people. Sometimes the humor was a little too over-the-top, but toning it down a bit will come in time, I’m sure. The realistic, thought-provoking moments more than make up for the humor when it bubbles up and runs over the sides. So it provides a nice balance.
I think we are all in agreement that we didn’t like Marc very much. As a character, he is portrayed well. But he’s a disagreeable cad otherwise, so the author did well with convincing us of his callous treatment of his wife, Margie Majors. She deserves better and we know she’s going to find it when she’s ready!
This story line had some nice action and an intriguing mystery to follow. With a strong female lead, it all comes together into a fun story. A very nice Book 1 start!
This was an interesting look at some intriguing people. Sometimes the humor was a little too over-the-top, but toning it down a bit will come in time, I’m sure. The realistic, thought-provoking moments more than make up for the humor when it bubbles up and runs over the sides. So it provides a nice balance.
I think we are all in agreement that we didn’t like Marc very much. As a character, he is portrayed well. But he’s a disagreeable cad otherwise, so the author did well with convincing us of his callous treatment of his wife, Margie Majors. She deserves better and we know she’s going to find it when she’s ready!
This story line had some nice action and an intriguing mystery to follow. With a strong female lead, it all comes together into a fun story. A very nice Book 1 start!
June 2, 2021
High School Reunion From Hell Indeed!
"This was why we were broken.
It was one of my worst fears coming true. Everything I had feared about myself growing up had been true. I was too much. I’d always been too tall, too strong, too loud, too much." - Margie
Margie, whose world is collapsing around her; Margie the only known RETIRED vampire slayer, finds herself caught in a web of desire and denial... Margie doesn't want to divorce her husband; that's HIS idea. Worse, she never expected to feel attracted to one of the entities of the night she was once charged with slaying... Throw in mysterious deaths and disappearances....
"We still had miles to go to solve these murders, and to get everyone I loved in the clear, but I knew I could do it. Everything was going to be okay." - Margie
Famous last words...
"This was why we were broken.
It was one of my worst fears coming true. Everything I had feared about myself growing up had been true. I was too much. I’d always been too tall, too strong, too loud, too much." - Margie
Margie, whose world is collapsing around her; Margie the only known RETIRED vampire slayer, finds herself caught in a web of desire and denial... Margie doesn't want to divorce her husband; that's HIS idea. Worse, she never expected to feel attracted to one of the entities of the night she was once charged with slaying... Throw in mysterious deaths and disappearances....
"We still had miles to go to solve these murders, and to get everyone I loved in the clear, but I knew I could do it. Everything was going to be okay." - Margie
Famous last words...
August 8, 2021
This was fun! I enjoyed reading about Margie, and the other main characters were also great additions. I just liked the whole concept, and world they live in.
I did feel some things from the past could have done with more explanation - I did wonder if I'd picked up book 2 in a series rather than the first one -but maybe some things will be explained more as the series goes on.
A fun, easy read, I'd love to read more!
I did feel some things from the past could have done with more explanation - I did wonder if I'd picked up book 2 in a series rather than the first one -but maybe some things will be explained more as the series goes on.
A fun, easy read, I'd love to read more!
May 10, 2021
I have found my new OBSESSION
Such a fun book and I just absolutely loved every little nuance of it. I feel like I knew how everything was playing out right in the brain of the author but I was still surprised along the way and my god it was awesome and I am sooooo excited for the next book!! Yay!!
Such a fun book and I just absolutely loved every little nuance of it. I feel like I knew how everything was playing out right in the brain of the author but I was still surprised along the way and my god it was awesome and I am sooooo excited for the next book!! Yay!!
June 5, 2021
I got super excited when I saw the cover and read the blurb, but the story just didn’t deliver in some aspects. It started off strong and I grew to like the heroine; however, I found the ending too rushed, and I wasn’t a fan of some of the jokes. I think there’s potential here and an editor would probably be able to help out before volume 2 comes out.
September 20, 2024
3.5*
Cheesy, yet pretty entertaining vampire stuff to read. Not so much vampirism involved tho. Maybe it changes in other books. At the very beginning, to manage to remember all the names were a bit overwhelming but after a few chapters, characters turned to be easily recognized. Definitely easy to read.
Cheesy, yet pretty entertaining vampire stuff to read. Not so much vampirism involved tho. Maybe it changes in other books. At the very beginning, to manage to remember all the names were a bit overwhelming but after a few chapters, characters turned to be easily recognized. Definitely easy to read.
May 5, 2021
Fun, Fast-Paced and Hilarious!
This book was hard to put down and so much fun to read! Quick, witty dialogue, relatable characters and so many hilarious scenes! I am excited for the next step in Margie’s journey!
This book was hard to put down and so much fun to read! Quick, witty dialogue, relatable characters and so many hilarious scenes! I am excited for the next step in Margie’s journey!
May 9, 2021
Fun premise
Middle-aged Buddy is a fun idea but I wasn't in love with some of the writing quirks. Some phrasing was hard to understand and there are random information dumps like 'Oh, I can shoot laser beams from my eyes now. Cool'
Was there is is lots of potential.
Middle-aged Buddy is a fun idea but I wasn't in love with some of the writing quirks. Some phrasing was hard to understand and there are random information dumps like 'Oh, I can shoot laser beams from my eyes now. Cool'
Was there is is lots of potential.
June 10, 2021
Awesome Book!!!
Awesome book!!!! I am so in love with Margie, she's loudmouthed, snarky and one of the best characters I have read about in a while. Please, please continue these stories!
Awesome book!!!! I am so in love with Margie, she's loudmouthed, snarky and one of the best characters I have read about in a while. Please, please continue these stories!
July 2, 2021
This book kicked butt!!!
Omg I loved this book!! It was a
I do straightforward and got to the point and I loved that. I get so sick of books that give you the run around!! Great plot excellent mystery and it was not rushed looking forward to the next one ☺
Omg I loved this book!! It was a
I do straightforward and got to the point and I loved that. I get so sick of books that give you the run around!! Great plot excellent mystery and it was not rushed looking forward to the next one ☺
June 15, 2021
The High School Reunion From Hell
Love love love this book. Lots of paranormal action and a different storyline than I’ve ever read. Already preordered book 2!
Love love love this book. Lots of paranormal action and a different storyline than I’ve ever read. Already preordered book 2!
May 16, 2021
Yes!!!
Middle aged, not tiny heroine?!?! Yes please! Kicking ass and taking names? Even better. I cannot wait for the next installment! Funny how people change. Amazing to see adults for a change in a story like this! Get it now!!!!!
Middle aged, not tiny heroine?!?! Yes please! Kicking ass and taking names? Even better. I cannot wait for the next installment! Funny how people change. Amazing to see adults for a change in a story like this! Get it now!!!!!
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews