Reality

by Gerald Schoenewolf

Pete Behring and his wife, Ja Lin, are watching the first football game of the fall at East Pennsylvania State University. While he is gazing at the cheerleaders, one of them, a beautiful young Asian, catches his eye. As he continues to gaze at her, she turns and looks directly at him and gives him a smile. Thus begins a bizarre flirtation with the pom-pom girl in which he becomes enthralled by the 19-year-old cheerleader queen and she begins to take up most of his thoughts.

'REALITY' explores the boundary between reality and fantasy and the emotions that run through each. Much of the novel is comprised of stream-of-consciousness fantasies that Pete has about the cheerleader. Other parts explore his relationship with Ja Lin, with his best friend, Jack, and with his childhood "first love," Daisy, juxtaposing fantasy, reality, present and past. The book is a starkly honest exploration of a man's shifting thoughts and feelings as the distant flirtation with the cheerleader takes him to the highest pinnacle of hope and the lowest pit of despair and back again. His relationships with his wife and best friend are backdrops to his fantasies, providing clues to who he is outside of his fantasies. This is a poetic, philosophical, and at times hilarious journey by a novelist who is also a psychoanalyst, which provides a profound, psychological portrait of the human condition.

291 pages, Paperback

First published March 25, 2021

About the author

Gerald Schoenewolf is a licensed psychoanalyst and professor of psychology. He is the author of 22 books, most of which are about clinical psychology and psychotherapy. He has also written six novels, a poetic translation of Chinese Daoist philosophy and an illustrated book of poetry, HOLDING ON AND LETTING GO (revised in 2020). He has also written 20 screenplays and written, directed and produced two feature films. Five of his screenplays have won awards at festivals. He lives with his wife, Julia and his parrot and two cats in the mountains of Pennsylvania.

Reviews

[Teresa Vu · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rating - 4/5

As a reader, there are some moments where I pick a book at random without knowing what it's about, and this was one of those moments. I found this book to be a little eyebrow-raising and kind of awkward; it reminds me of the movie "American Beauty" except without all the violence and disagreements. If you haven't read the summary already, it's about a 69-year old man named Pete Behring and his wife Ja Lin. They attend an East Pennsylvania State University (EPSU) Game, and his eyes fall on this Asian cheerleader. He fantasizes about her, convinces himself that she is flirting with him as well, and finds himself falling in and out of attraction to Ja Lin. In his mind, he constantly compares the Asian cheerleader to Ja Lin, and he believes that the best way to meet the Asian cheerleader is to meet up with her by attending more EPSU football games/basketball games.

This is just my opinion, but I found it to be awkward because there were times that he described his sexual fantasies with the Asian cheerleader (who he nicknames as Jenny), which I found to be kind of cringeworthy and unpleasant. If I were put into Jenny's shoes, I definitely would be uncomfortable to have someone who is old enough to be my father to have those ideas of me, but at the same time, I think everyone has weird fantasies at any point of their lifetime.

I do think that the poetry portion(s) of the book were well-written, and I could relate to his relationship with Ja Lin (I think everyone who has experienced Asian parents/family members could probably relate to this) - the constant nagging, the constant feeling of perfection, always comparing their spouse/loved ones to other people, etc. I also appreciated the part about Pete's relationship with his childhood friend, Daisy; I think that explains some of the reason why he feels the way that he does.

Overall, I felt like this book was awkward, but again, that's just my opinion. However, if the main character was meant to be awkward/embarrassing, I think that was portrayed in the book very well. The poetry/free-flow part was very well-written. Would I recommend it? It's hard for me to say; I recommend that you shouldn't jump into random books like me, and read the summary AT LEAST, so you know what you're getting yourself into!

**A huge thank-you to Goodreads, Gerald Schoenewolf, Living Center Press, and Amazon Kindle for sponsoring this giveaway. All opinions and thoughts are my own and are in no way affected by this giveaway.**

[Amy Capella · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the most unusual novels I’ve read in a long time. Written in the first person, it is a mixture of narrative, fantasy, and flashback, all very well-written. The fantasy sections are composed in an unusual poetic, almost staccato stream-of-consciousness. I found myself caught up in the story of the book because it is really engaging. From the opening chapter, when Pete, the protagonist, exchanges smiles with “Jenny,” the college cheerleader, I was caught up in the story. Pete’s voice is funny and honest, and the book is remarkably compelling, despite the fact that it mostly takes place within Pete’s mind, with the real events and the fantasies all filtered through his perspective. Pete carries the story, and we’re following along with his up and down cycle. Even though the book is comprised by long fantasy sections, his character is written in such a way that the plot moves like a thriller, so that at times I felt happy, dejected, or hopeless, and at other times I was holding my breath at the recklessness and inappropriateness of his actions. Every time he seems to be coming to grips with himself, he takes us on another rollercoaster ride. The flashback chapter about his first love with 8-year-old daisy is beautiful, poetic and nostalgic and was a highpoint. I would say that this is a ten.

[Edith Codrington · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book mesmerized me from the second page on, when Pete, the dreamer-protagonist, sets eyes on a 19-year-old cheerleader and she gives him a smile. Be warned: this is no ordinary novel. From the moment he first encounters the beautiful Asian cheerleader, Pete's life turns upside down, and he begins to fantasize about her. Pete goes back and forth from his fantasy life about "Jenny," to his real life with his wife, Ja Lin. There are two gorgeous stream-of-consciousness erotic fantasies that blew me away. These were not graphic sex fantasies, but the cosmic musings of an enthralled, creative, unbound mind during the act of sex. The book also has a lovely flashback to Pete's first love, an eight-year-old girl named Daisy, whose precocious sexuality left him haunted for the rest of his life. I started this book thinking it was just going to be a cute story of an older man's infatuation with a cheerleader, but it was so much more than that. It turned out to be one of the most original novels I've ever read, one that honestly conveys the inner workings of a man's mind and takes the reader on moving, funny, roller-coaster ride. The author, who is a psychoanalyst, really gives you an in-depth psychological portrait of the human condition.

[Nancy Mcclenathan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This novel was a quick read about a 69 year old man, who is married to a Chinese American woman, but fantasizes about an Asian college cheerleader that he sees at a football game. From his relationship with his wife to his fantasies about the cheerleader it makes for an interesting, unique read.

Thanks to Giveaway giveaway for this ebook.

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

Throughly enjoyed the storyline and read

[Mary · Rating 4 out of 5]

good book