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Full Metal Octopus
Welcome to Grub Town, the most corrupt city in America. A place where gutter punk mermaids swim in sewage-filled canals, fairy prostitutes hang in birdcages on every street corner, and yakuza elves run everything behind the scenes.
Eliot is the most beautiful fairy in all of the city with his dazzling emerald green butterfly wings that make everyone who sees them fall instantly in lust with him. But it's more of a curse than a blessing. Forced to hide his wings in public in order to avoid the constant sexual harassment, Eliot only finds solace when visiting his friends at the Snake Pit lamia strip club or getting tattooed by the dark and mysterious half-octopus woman named Oona.
Oona is the best tattooist in the city, but she is a frightening woman three times Eliot's size with nine-foot tentacles that could choke a man to death in seconds. But despite this fact, Eliot is desperately in love with her. He's so infatuated with the octomaid that he gets new tattoos from her each and every week just to be closer to her, addicted to having her artwork permanently embedded into his skin. But when Eliot accidentally murders the only heir to the elf yakuza crime family in Oona's tattoo shop, they are forced to go on the run together, hoping to avoid the wrath of the most dangerous man in town. With everyone in the city out to get them, they can only rely on each other if they have any hope for survival.
Like if Quentin Tarantino played with Monster High dolls, Full Metal Octopus is a return to Mellick's pulpy gritty bizarro style previously seen in The Cannibals of Candyland, Armadillo Fists, and Clownfellas
Eliot is the most beautiful fairy in all of the city with his dazzling emerald green butterfly wings that make everyone who sees them fall instantly in lust with him. But it's more of a curse than a blessing. Forced to hide his wings in public in order to avoid the constant sexual harassment, Eliot only finds solace when visiting his friends at the Snake Pit lamia strip club or getting tattooed by the dark and mysterious half-octopus woman named Oona.
Oona is the best tattooist in the city, but she is a frightening woman three times Eliot's size with nine-foot tentacles that could choke a man to death in seconds. But despite this fact, Eliot is desperately in love with her. He's so infatuated with the octomaid that he gets new tattoos from her each and every week just to be closer to her, addicted to having her artwork permanently embedded into his skin. But when Eliot accidentally murders the only heir to the elf yakuza crime family in Oona's tattoo shop, they are forced to go on the run together, hoping to avoid the wrath of the most dangerous man in town. With everyone in the city out to get them, they can only rely on each other if they have any hope for survival.
Like if Quentin Tarantino played with Monster High dolls, Full Metal Octopus is a return to Mellick's pulpy gritty bizarro style previously seen in The Cannibals of Candyland, Armadillo Fists, and Clownfellas
216 pages, Paperback
Published July 20, 2021
7 people are currently reading
139 people want to read
About the author
Carlton Mellick III
119 books2,168 followersCarlton Mellick III (July 2, 1977, Phoenix, Arizona) is an American author currently residing in Portland, Oregon. He calls his style of writing "avant-punk," and is currently one of the leading authors in the recent 'Bizarro' movement in underground literature[citation needed] with Steve Aylett, Chris Genoa and D. Harlan Wilson.
Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.
Carlton Mellick III started writing at the age of ten and completed twelve novels by the age of eighteen. Only one of these early novels, "Electric Jesus Corpse", ever made it to print.
He is best known for his first novel Satan Burger and its sequel Punk Land. Satan Burger was translated into Russian and published by Ultra Culture in 2005. It was part of a four book series called Brave New World, which also featured Virtual Light by William Gibson, City Come A Walkin by John Shirley, and Tea from an Empty Cup by Pat Cadigan.
In the late 90's, he formed a collective for offbeat authors which included D. Harlan Wilson, Kevin L. Donihe, Vincent Sakowski, among others, and the publishing company Eraserhead Press. This scene evolved into the Bizarro fiction movement in 2005.
In addition to writing, Mellick is an artist and musician.
Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.
Carlton Mellick III started writing at the age of ten and completed twelve novels by the age of eighteen. Only one of these early novels, "Electric Jesus Corpse", ever made it to print.
He is best known for his first novel Satan Burger and its sequel Punk Land. Satan Burger was translated into Russian and published by Ultra Culture in 2005. It was part of a four book series called Brave New World, which also featured Virtual Light by William Gibson, City Come A Walkin by John Shirley, and Tea from an Empty Cup by Pat Cadigan.
In the late 90's, he formed a collective for offbeat authors which included D. Harlan Wilson, Kevin L. Donihe, Vincent Sakowski, among others, and the publishing company Eraserhead Press. This scene evolved into the Bizarro fiction movement in 2005.
In addition to writing, Mellick is an artist and musician.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
August 3, 2021
How am I the second person to review this book?
Do people not understand the majesty of the works of Mellick?
Has anyone seen my keys?
Do people not understand the majesty of the works of Mellick?
Has anyone seen my keys?
October 12, 2021
Horror Bookworm Reviews
https://horrorbookwormreviews.com/
Eliot is a five foot tall winged fairy. His delicate flesh is riddled with an addiction of tattoos & piercings. Oona is an octomaid deriving from the octopus species. Displaying a stylish blue mohawk, this talented tattoo artist generates ink within her own physical ecosystem. The unlikely duo become entangled in a savage and cold-blooded crime. The two quickly realize the only way for survival is the trust and companionship they have for one another.
Carlton Mellick III, probably the most creative and imaginative author in the business, exudes his unusual expertise into his book titled Full Metal Octopus. Establishing a blood fueled mobster backdrop, Mellick paints his unhinged canvas with a storyline saturated by bizarro mafia fiction. At the forefront of this fairytale is a fable of tentacle twisted beauty that oozes erotica and enchanted pheromones. Sprinkle in a wide variety of diverse species including elves, humans, centaurs, fairies and merefolk and you have a solid recipe for a slimy good time.
Pulling from the depths of surreal atmospheres, otherworldly phraseology and a substantial even flow of amphibian violence, Full Metal Octopus is a pleasurable aphrodisiac to the Bizarro genre. The ability to streamline these strange conceptions is a testament to this author’s peculiar writing talent. I’ve come to the conclusion that Mellick books are like Lay’s potato chips…you can’t read just one.
Not only will the reader receive this beautifully packaged novel, but at the behest of the mermaid red-light district the purchaser also receives a bonus section of Mellick’s exceptional artwork to view and admire. This work of Bizarro fiction is best read after downing a mason jar of alcoholic sludge and a toke of black weed cigarettes. A five star ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Horror Bookworm Recommendation.
https://horrorbookwormreviews.com/
Eliot is a five foot tall winged fairy. His delicate flesh is riddled with an addiction of tattoos & piercings. Oona is an octomaid deriving from the octopus species. Displaying a stylish blue mohawk, this talented tattoo artist generates ink within her own physical ecosystem. The unlikely duo become entangled in a savage and cold-blooded crime. The two quickly realize the only way for survival is the trust and companionship they have for one another.
Carlton Mellick III, probably the most creative and imaginative author in the business, exudes his unusual expertise into his book titled Full Metal Octopus. Establishing a blood fueled mobster backdrop, Mellick paints his unhinged canvas with a storyline saturated by bizarro mafia fiction. At the forefront of this fairytale is a fable of tentacle twisted beauty that oozes erotica and enchanted pheromones. Sprinkle in a wide variety of diverse species including elves, humans, centaurs, fairies and merefolk and you have a solid recipe for a slimy good time.
Pulling from the depths of surreal atmospheres, otherworldly phraseology and a substantial even flow of amphibian violence, Full Metal Octopus is a pleasurable aphrodisiac to the Bizarro genre. The ability to streamline these strange conceptions is a testament to this author’s peculiar writing talent. I’ve come to the conclusion that Mellick books are like Lay’s potato chips…you can’t read just one.
Not only will the reader receive this beautifully packaged novel, but at the behest of the mermaid red-light district the purchaser also receives a bonus section of Mellick’s exceptional artwork to view and admire. This work of Bizarro fiction is best read after downing a mason jar of alcoholic sludge and a toke of black weed cigarettes. A five star ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Horror Bookworm Recommendation.
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June 3, 2022A pulpy fantasy-infused gangster/hentai mashup that seems on the surface like it might be too much, but this book nails the execution. Full Metal Octopus was exciting and horny in equal measure and I was surprised at how deep and heartfelt the central love story was. Really liked the setting too, and all the various monster races and how they've learned to adapt and survive together.
April 30, 2021
Equally crammed with bonkers ideas and emotionally resonant moments, FULL METAL OCTOPUS is the crust-fantasy (staph and sorcery?) thrill ride of the year. Kind of like TRUE ROMANCE, except there's a tattooing octo-chick and a skater fairy on the run from the elves, the lizard people, the mermaids, and practically every other fantastic race you can imagine. Guess you could call this his J.R.R. Tarantino phase, and man, the modernized gutterpunk secondary fantasy world is definitely one that bears revisiting. See you in Grub Town!
April 20, 2022
I was fully engaged reading Full Metal Octopus. Mellick dives into some rather kinky sexual themes and even pokes a little fun at the whole transgender movement, blending the whole story with a dangerous mobster out to avenge the death of his son. For me, this was one of Mellick's best books, and while I would not say it is his very best, it is easily in my top 10 of his 60+ book catalog. The story moved fast, with interesting characters, intense violence, quirky romance, and a fully satisfying ending that completed a near perfect Bizarro novel. To this day, Mellick never fails to deliver. If you are curious about what Bizarro is all about, look no further. Mellick is the cream of the crop.
December 23, 2024
Nakonec to byla skoro těžká romantika. Romeo a Julie hadra. :D
December 25, 2024
Opět jsem neodolal tomu geniálnímu názvu, ten chlap by na to měl mít zbrojní pas. Oproti jiným Mellickovým bizárům se mi Chapadla zdála poněkud krotší, ovšem tím v žádném případě nechci říct, že byste tady mohli o něco přijít. Je to opět úlet, jak jinak. Než to dočtete, budete od hlavy až k patě od krve všech barev, různých jiných sekretů a dokonce i od inkoustu. Potkáte reverzně transsexuální víly i nemilosrdné elfy, sexy chobotnice i žraloky se samopaly. A taky zamilovanou story, u které zamáčknete pod okem kapičku slizu.
A já si teď vážně dám od Mellicka delší pauzu. Tohle vypadá na jasný případ "guilty pleasure".
A já si teď vážně dám od Mellicka delší pauzu. Tohle vypadá na jasný případ "guilty pleasure".
January 30, 2022
The book grabbed me with its sexy, sexy tentacles and would not let go. If you're looking for a very alternative romance this Valentine's you can't go wrong with this story of a pretty boy punk fairy getting it on with a giant octomaid tattoo artist. Oh and there's gangster stuff and lamia strippers, it's a wild ride. Like Narnia in Sin City.
November 4, 2024
Tohle se Mellickovi povedlo. Takova gangsterska love story, kde v hlavni roli jsou vily (vilac), chobotnice, elfove a dalsi podivini. Skvele se cte a navic ma sem tam i necekany humor. Libilo se mi, ze kdyz v jedne scene byla vylozene nelogicnost, podivil se nad ni i sam hrdina.
October 26, 2024
Mellick prostě nezklame. Romantika mellickovského typu (i když jedna scéna byla až nečekaně kýčovitě přeslazená, možná záměrně), skvělé postavy, oblíbila jsem si lamií dvojku, ty by si zasloužily vlastní příběh (pokud už ho tedy nenapsal). Solidně vyvážený mix zábavy, bizáru, bizarního sexu, akce a napětí, přečetla jsem na jeden zátah. Nechybí ani skvělej komiks na závěr. Díky Carcoso, že Mellicka vydáváte.
May 13, 2022
This makes me sad.
I've been enjoying CM3's books for almost ten years now, steadily working through his catalogue, and I've finally reached a book I do not care for at all. It really is a testament to his consistency that it took me that long, though that's the only positive thing I can say about this book.
World building has always been integral to what makes CM3's books special. They're so wild and funny, yet he makes them believable. I just don't care for Grub Town. It's a hodgepodge of fantasy creatures that just do mostly normal human stuff and it's just not interesting to me. Everything feels "been there, done that".
The characters were flat, rushed, and worst of all boring. CM3 has done MUCH better romances ("Stacking Doll" makes this look like a Disney love story). I've never been really bothered by the now obligatory sex scenes in his books, but the ones in this book legit made me uncomfortable. Consent in the scenes is so questionable that it borders on r*pe fantasy, and I don't know what other readers think, but that's absolutely abhorrent. Topics like assault and gender are kind of explored, which would be commendable if they contributed anything to the story.
Maybe I'll add more to this review sometime, but for now I'm just disappointed. Overall, what I really missed in this book is originality. Right down to the title, there is no attempt at covering new ground, even while the book is filled with cliches and tired CM3 tropes. I'm happy to see him still grinding and storytelling, especially during these turbulent days when creativity is hard to maintain.
I've been enjoying CM3's books for almost ten years now, steadily working through his catalogue, and I've finally reached a book I do not care for at all. It really is a testament to his consistency that it took me that long, though that's the only positive thing I can say about this book.
World building has always been integral to what makes CM3's books special. They're so wild and funny, yet he makes them believable. I just don't care for Grub Town. It's a hodgepodge of fantasy creatures that just do mostly normal human stuff and it's just not interesting to me. Everything feels "been there, done that".
The characters were flat, rushed, and worst of all boring. CM3 has done MUCH better romances ("Stacking Doll" makes this look like a Disney love story). I've never been really bothered by the now obligatory sex scenes in his books, but the ones in this book legit made me uncomfortable. Consent in the scenes is so questionable that it borders on r*pe fantasy, and I don't know what other readers think, but that's absolutely abhorrent. Topics like assault and gender are kind of explored, which would be commendable if they contributed anything to the story.
Maybe I'll add more to this review sometime, but for now I'm just disappointed. Overall, what I really missed in this book is originality. Right down to the title, there is no attempt at covering new ground, even while the book is filled with cliches and tired CM3 tropes. I'm happy to see him still grinding and storytelling, especially during these turbulent days when creativity is hard to maintain.
October 25, 2024
Další Mellick, další zvrácená jízda plná sexu a masakrů… ale zároveň i citu a věrohodných postav.
Je to čtení na jeden zátah, ale přitom rozhodně ne pitomé. Mellickův román je, jako obvykle, rychlý, přímočarý a v podstatě béčkový (rozhodně co se týče řešení problémů), ale nějak mi přijde, že tady ty vztahové linky jsou nejen zajímavější a věrohodnější než v jeho minulých románech, ale i než v románech, které se o věrohodné vztahové linky usilovně snaží. Plus je tam zajímavý svět plný magických bytostí a samozřejmě, spousta chapadlovitého sexu.
A do toho je ještě hrdina trans, což je tady funkční součást děje, nikoliv až tak úlitba bohům. Tedy, hrdina je vílák, bytost, které nejenže dokáže rozrajcovat i slepého impotenta, ale navíc se mění podle přání těch, kteří po něm zatouží. On se však cítí být mužem a má oči (a penis) jen pro jedinou bytost – chobotnicovitou tatérku, která mění jeho tělo v dokonalé umělecké dílo. Jenže ta o něj nemá zájem… dokud se oba nedostanou do sporu s elfí mafií a musí se vydat na útěk.
Jenže je možný vůbec vztah tak protikladných bytostí… i za předpokladu, že je nedostanou elfové?
Za mě jedna z nejlepších Mellickových knih, která přináší jak dostatečnou porci bizarna a nechutností, tak dokonce i emoce.
Jo, a taky komiks!
Je to čtení na jeden zátah, ale přitom rozhodně ne pitomé. Mellickův román je, jako obvykle, rychlý, přímočarý a v podstatě béčkový (rozhodně co se týče řešení problémů), ale nějak mi přijde, že tady ty vztahové linky jsou nejen zajímavější a věrohodnější než v jeho minulých románech, ale i než v románech, které se o věrohodné vztahové linky usilovně snaží. Plus je tam zajímavý svět plný magických bytostí a samozřejmě, spousta chapadlovitého sexu.
A do toho je ještě hrdina trans, což je tady funkční součást děje, nikoliv až tak úlitba bohům. Tedy, hrdina je vílák, bytost, které nejenže dokáže rozrajcovat i slepého impotenta, ale navíc se mění podle přání těch, kteří po něm zatouží. On se však cítí být mužem a má oči (a penis) jen pro jedinou bytost – chobotnicovitou tatérku, která mění jeho tělo v dokonalé umělecké dílo. Jenže ta o něj nemá zájem… dokud se oba nedostanou do sporu s elfí mafií a musí se vydat na útěk.
Jenže je možný vůbec vztah tak protikladných bytostí… i za předpokladu, že je nedostanou elfové?
Za mě jedna z nejlepších Mellickových knih, která přináší jak dostatečnou porci bizarna a nechutností, tak dokonce i emoce.
Jo, a taky komiks!
December 26, 2023
Град, прояден от корупция, престъпления, проституция и дрога, е в лапите на няколко враждуващи фамилии. Две от тях — якуза елфската мафия на Силфите, предвождани от Шино Каджи, и водните Наиади, на които главатар е старият, но безпощаден Маркус, от години имат сметки за разплащане и кръвна вражда, но живеят в привидно примирие, стига всеки да си стои в неговата част на града.
И това крехко спокойствие сигурно щеше да продължи още много години, ако тъпото отроче на Шино Канджи не беше хвърлил похотливо око на Елиът — красив, беден фей, с прекрасни смарагдови крила, към когото почти няма същество, което да не изпитва сексуално влечение. Само че Елиът има очи само за Оона — татуистка октопод, която работи в стаичките зад пропадналия вертеп и стрийптиз клуб "Гнездо на змии". О, да — казва се така, защото танцьорките са змии и лами.
Едва ли има друг автор, който да забърква такива невероятни бизаро истории и светове.
И това крехко спокойствие сигурно щеше да продължи още много години, ако тъпото отроче на Шино Канджи не беше хвърлил похотливо око на Елиът — красив, беден фей, с прекрасни смарагдови крила, към когото почти няма същество, което да не изпитва сексуално влечение. Само че Елиът има очи само за Оона — татуистка октопод, която работи в стаичките зад пропадналия вертеп и стрийптиз клуб "Гнездо на змии". О, да — казва се така, защото танцьорките са змии и лами.
Едва ли има друг автор, който да забърква такива невероятни бизаро истории и светове.
December 17, 2023
Fill Metal Octopus is the quintessential Bizarro novel - Carlton Mellick blends surrealism with absurdism, dystopian horror with romance, sex, and satire. Every word is milked from the secretion glands of an octopus, tattooed on the body of a body of a fairy, and copied into the book that is Full Metal Octopus for our tremendous entertainment.
I don't know that I have ever read a book where the characters are so alien, yet so relatable and believable. Right from page one, I was able to completely suspend disbelief and become fully emersed in this universe filled with Shark men and Octomaids and Fairies, and elves, snake people, etc. And the pages flew by - the ending is perfect, but it comes too soon...
Full Metal Octopus is among the top five books that I have read this year, and it is the first book that I would recommend to someone looking to get into Bizarro Fiction.
I don't know that I have ever read a book where the characters are so alien, yet so relatable and believable. Right from page one, I was able to completely suspend disbelief and become fully emersed in this universe filled with Shark men and Octomaids and Fairies, and elves, snake people, etc. And the pages flew by - the ending is perfect, but it comes too soon...
Full Metal Octopus is among the top five books that I have read this year, and it is the first book that I would recommend to someone looking to get into Bizarro Fiction.
June 16, 2025
There is an octopus-lady on the cover, and it's bizarro-fiction. Hesitant, but intrigued, I expected to be confused and violated.
It's a world of elf yakuza, mermaid sex workers, and our beautiful fairy main character, Eliot. These aren't enchanted forest fairies, it is urban grime that seems to coat everything, whether that be fairy wings or lamia scales with a tactile sleaze. Life is not good or easy, but there is plenty of sex, lots of magical creature sex. This was not unexpected. The sex was weird, fun, slimy, and heartfelt. I appreciated the vulnerability and self-reflection from Eliot about it.
I may not have needed to know the highly descriptive details of how these creatures have sex, but it was certainly imaginative and... something. With some lore sprinkled in, the world felt alive and still very weird.
This isn’t a profound book, but it knows exactly what it is, horny, gory, violent, and oddly tender. I respect that.
It's a world of elf yakuza, mermaid sex workers, and our beautiful fairy main character, Eliot. These aren't enchanted forest fairies, it is urban grime that seems to coat everything, whether that be fairy wings or lamia scales with a tactile sleaze. Life is not good or easy, but there is plenty of sex, lots of magical creature sex. This was not unexpected. The sex was weird, fun, slimy, and heartfelt. I appreciated the vulnerability and self-reflection from Eliot about it.
I may not have needed to know the highly descriptive details of how these creatures have sex, but it was certainly imaginative and... something. With some lore sprinkled in, the world felt alive and still very weird.
This isn’t a profound book, but it knows exactly what it is, horny, gory, violent, and oddly tender. I respect that.
December 22, 2025
If this was a different (read: queer) author, this could've been a really interesting exploration of gender, sex and consent.
But because it was Carlton Mellick it was tentacle sex and mafia fight-offs. Still decently entertaining bizzaro that mostly (well okay that's up for the debate) steered away from the most problematic issues his books usually go, and for what this book is I'm giving it a four
But because it was Carlton Mellick it was tentacle sex and mafia fight-offs. Still decently entertaining bizzaro that mostly (well okay that's up for the debate) steered away from the most problematic issues his books usually go, and for what this book is I'm giving it a four
August 14, 2024
This story has it all, mafia violence, strip clubs full of mermaids and snake women, murder, cover up, but above all? It's a beautiful love story about a fairy who loves his tattoo artist Oona. She's a giant octomaid who uses her own art to tattoo the fairy. He is her masterpiece. If you're a fan of bizarro fiction, this one is a must read!
December 20, 2025
“The collision of two worlds is as beautiful as it is destructive”. Nicely said. Good book, great plot. Loved all the different characters….elves, fairies, mermaids, lizards, octomaids……I also loved how grimy the city was, raw and alive. Could have done without all the weird tentacle sex stuff but hey, it is bizarro:)
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 24, 2024
I didn't want this book to end it was so good- I loved both Oona and Eliot and want more of them. I have never enjoyed romance but this worked for me- opposites attract. Of course there is the usual Carlton Mellick bizarro world with crazy characters and world. Very unique.
August 24, 2021
I loved the book. It got really weird and uncomfortable and I love that. Still had heartfelt elements. Definitely recommend!
October 26, 2021
This made me cry. What is wrong with me that this made me cry? Why was this sweet? Dang it all. This was really good and weird and I loved it.
March 20, 2022
Another great Carlton Mellick III. Really enjoyed it
March 19, 2025
4.5⭐️ rounded up😘
November 29, 2024
These Bizarro books are such treasures.
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews