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Love in Any Language: A Memoir of a Cross-Cultural Marriage
Love across cultures is tested when Antonio, a penniless university student, and Evelyn, a strong-willed Peace Corps volunteer, succumb to their attraction to one another at the end of her two-year commitment in Peru and Evelyn gets pregnant. Deeply in love, the twenty-three-year-olds marry in Cusco—and decide to begin their married life in Northern California.
Evelyn, like most wives of the ’60s and ’70s, expects her husband to support their family. And Antonio tries to take his place as head of the household, but he must first learn English, complete college, and find an adequate job. To make ends meet, Evelyn secures full-time positions, leaving their infant son in the care of others, and they both go on to attend college—she for two years, he for six. Then Antonio is offered a full-time professorship at the university he attended in Peru, and he takes it—leaving Evelyn a single parent. Parenthood, financial stress, the pull of both countries, and long visits from Antonio’s mother threaten to destroy the bonds that brought them together.
Clear-eyed and frank, Love in Any Language illustrates the trials and joys in the blending of two cultures.
Evelyn, like most wives of the ’60s and ’70s, expects her husband to support their family. And Antonio tries to take his place as head of the household, but he must first learn English, complete college, and find an adequate job. To make ends meet, Evelyn secures full-time positions, leaving their infant son in the care of others, and they both go on to attend college—she for two years, he for six. Then Antonio is offered a full-time professorship at the university he attended in Peru, and he takes it—leaving Evelyn a single parent. Parenthood, financial stress, the pull of both countries, and long visits from Antonio’s mother threaten to destroy the bonds that brought them together.
Clear-eyed and frank, Love in Any Language illustrates the trials and joys in the blending of two cultures.
- GenresMemoir
321 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 28, 2021
2 people are currently reading
48 people want to read
About the author
Evelyn Kohl LaTorre
3 books8 followersEvelyn Kohl LaTorre grew up in rural Southeastern Montana, surrounded by sheep and cattle ranches, before coming to California with her family at age 16. She holds a doctorate in multicultural education from the University of San Francisco, and a master’s degree in social welfare from UC Berkeley. She worked as a bilingual school psychologist and school administrator in public education for 32 years.
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Displaying 1 - 26 of 26 reviews
September 22, 2021
This is the story of an American woman who fell in love with a Peruvian man. Upon discovering an unexpected pregnancy, they decide to get married and face life together.
As I write this review, I know the story may seem simple and romantic, but there's a lot of challenges on the way. We follow their journey deciding where they're gonna live, how their families reacted to the news, all the stress adapting to a new place, job hunting, feeling like you're not enough, studying like crazy, making sacrifices and taking care of the kids. Sometimes things can get so overwhelming...
Life is made of choices, and we can never have it all. The author did a great job telling her story and portraying the real people around her. We can see that nobody is perfect, but with love, values, patience and respect we can become strong to face whatever comes in the way.
I love the way she talks about cultures and how we complement each other. People who have the opportunity to spend some time away from their native countries definitely learn new perspectives. Things that didn't seem so important before suddenly get a new meaning.
If nowadays I still think it's a huge challenge to live abroad, I wonder what it was like back in the day, without internet, without facetime, even phone calls weren't so usual... People just waited for letters... I can't even imagine the amount of courage they had.
I'm Brazilian, so I loved all the mentions of my country and Paulo Coelho's quote.
This was a wonderful read and I totally recommend it! Thanks Evelyn for sharing your story.
-------
* I received this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review
* Trigger Warning: alcohol consumption, depression and suicide. Nothing too deep or graphic, but it touches these topics at some point.
As I write this review, I know the story may seem simple and romantic, but there's a lot of challenges on the way. We follow their journey deciding where they're gonna live, how their families reacted to the news, all the stress adapting to a new place, job hunting, feeling like you're not enough, studying like crazy, making sacrifices and taking care of the kids. Sometimes things can get so overwhelming...
Life is made of choices, and we can never have it all. The author did a great job telling her story and portraying the real people around her. We can see that nobody is perfect, but with love, values, patience and respect we can become strong to face whatever comes in the way.
I love the way she talks about cultures and how we complement each other. People who have the opportunity to spend some time away from their native countries definitely learn new perspectives. Things that didn't seem so important before suddenly get a new meaning.
If nowadays I still think it's a huge challenge to live abroad, I wonder what it was like back in the day, without internet, without facetime, even phone calls weren't so usual... People just waited for letters... I can't even imagine the amount of courage they had.
I'm Brazilian, so I loved all the mentions of my country and Paulo Coelho's quote.
This was a wonderful read and I totally recommend it! Thanks Evelyn for sharing your story.
-------
* I received this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review
* Trigger Warning: alcohol consumption, depression and suicide. Nothing too deep or graphic, but it touches these topics at some point.
December 21, 2021
Back in the summer of 2020 I was captivated by Evelyn Kohl LaTorre’s story of finding love in Peru during her time stationed there with the Peace Corps. And I had mentioned in my review that I really wanted to see what happened to that love story once Evelyn’s time in Peru came to an end… And thankfully this wish came true as Evelyn wrote another memoir detailing the next few decades of her life with Antonio! I actually read Love in Any Language within a few days over the summer, and was just as captivated by Evelyn’s words as I was with her initial memoir, Between Inca Walls.
In Love in Any Language we learn how Evelyn and Antonio navigate life together in the US, where Evelyn becomes the main breadwinner for a while, and Antonio struggles to find work, even after he finishes his studies. We also study the ups and downs of life as a couple with two small children, both passionate about everything that they love, and intent on creating a better life for their family, and also for those around them.
What I found the most inspiring is how Evelyn managed to juggle everything: school, work, being a present mother, and also being there for her extended family, all the while always looking to improve their own living situations, and supporting Antonio through his darker times. As someone with three small children and a full time school load I know just how much it takes from you, and really thoroughly admire Evelyn. I can honestly say that Evelyn’s memoir has inspired me to keep at it and to not give up. Education is for life, and we are never too old to take on a new course or a new discipline!
I also don’t want to give the most beautiful part of this story away, but I’m a real sucker for a proper, real life love story, and this is really as good as it gets.
Thank you Evelyn for your honesty and your ability to dig deep and tell a story that everyone should hear!
In Love in Any Language we learn how Evelyn and Antonio navigate life together in the US, where Evelyn becomes the main breadwinner for a while, and Antonio struggles to find work, even after he finishes his studies. We also study the ups and downs of life as a couple with two small children, both passionate about everything that they love, and intent on creating a better life for their family, and also for those around them.
What I found the most inspiring is how Evelyn managed to juggle everything: school, work, being a present mother, and also being there for her extended family, all the while always looking to improve their own living situations, and supporting Antonio through his darker times. As someone with three small children and a full time school load I know just how much it takes from you, and really thoroughly admire Evelyn. I can honestly say that Evelyn’s memoir has inspired me to keep at it and to not give up. Education is for life, and we are never too old to take on a new course or a new discipline!
I also don’t want to give the most beautiful part of this story away, but I’m a real sucker for a proper, real life love story, and this is really as good as it gets.
Thank you Evelyn for your honesty and your ability to dig deep and tell a story that everyone should hear!
July 16, 2022
In this follow-up to Between Inca Walls, Evelyn Kohl LaTorre describes life after the Peace Corps: unexpectedly married and expecting a child (not in that order), she and her new husband moved to the US to start a new life together. In many ways, things were easier for Kohl LaTorre than for her husband: she already had a degree that was accepted in the States, she spoke English, and although she faced some culture shock after two years in Peru, it was nothing like the culture shock of someone who had spent his whole life in Peru. She loved Peru, but it wasn't her home; she wasn't homesick in the way her husband was. In other ways...it was the 60s, and she was a woman.
Then my employer requested my obstetrician's written document stating our baby's [expected] birthdate. I faced a difficult decision. I couldn't tell the truth and be forced to leave my job early. My paycheck had to sustain us until Antonio's job could cover our expenses. I felt healthy enough to work up to my due date. I coped as I needed to—by forging ahead and trusting things to work out. So, when my obstetrician wrote on the required form that the baby would arrive around 1-9-67, I changed the birth month from "1" to "3." My forgery was successful, and I continued working until Christmas. (33)
This isn't as focused as Between Inca Walls, which has a natural structure based on the finite period that Kohl LaTorre spent in the Peace Corps. Love in Any Language spans decades and ends up being as much about her career as her cross-cultural marriage—both of which had some ups and downs, as one might expect. Still, it's nice to see the more complicated 'after' once the fairy tale wears off.
Then my employer requested my obstetrician's written document stating our baby's [expected] birthdate. I faced a difficult decision. I couldn't tell the truth and be forced to leave my job early. My paycheck had to sustain us until Antonio's job could cover our expenses. I felt healthy enough to work up to my due date. I coped as I needed to—by forging ahead and trusting things to work out. So, when my obstetrician wrote on the required form that the baby would arrive around 1-9-67, I changed the birth month from "1" to "3." My forgery was successful, and I continued working until Christmas. (33)
This isn't as focused as Between Inca Walls, which has a natural structure based on the finite period that Kohl LaTorre spent in the Peace Corps. Love in Any Language spans decades and ends up being as much about her career as her cross-cultural marriage—both of which had some ups and downs, as one might expect. Still, it's nice to see the more complicated 'after' once the fairy tale wears off.
December 28, 2021
In the age of divorces and breaking marriages, this story brings a beautiful perspective of how a couple managed to maintain their relationship and marriage despite facing adversities throughout their lives.
A must-read for people of all ages.
4 stars.
A must-read for people of all ages.
4 stars.
January 10, 2022
I am a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer. So reading la Torre's "Love in Any Language" was super relatable. But you don't have to be an RPCV to understand this endearing story. If you want a glimpse into the life of a career-woman doing her best to make things work for her family - at a time when the prevailing norm was for women to stay home - then I highly recommend reading la Torre's book. It'll give you an appreciation for the modern woman, whether it's 40 years ago or now.
August 11, 2021
Loved this one as much as Evelyn's first book! At the end of "Between Inca Walls," I couldn't wait to see what happened in the next chapter of Evelyn's life -- and this book does just that. The writing is easy, and this one is honestly such a quick read, perfect for a weekend.
August 12, 2021
I really loved the author's voice in this memoir! Straight to the point and easy to read, this is a great story for such a variety of audiences -- married couples, divorced couples, single folks, etc. There's definitely something for everyone in this book.
August 13, 2021
Evelyn's perspective was so interesting and unique yet also so universal. For all the married couples out there, this is a great read to see how two partners work together and work through the challenges life throws at them.
August 13, 2021
Highly recommend! This was a quick read — I found myself finishing it in just a couple days. The story of Evelyn and Antonio's marriage is one I think so many people will be able to relate to.
September 13, 2021
I have a soft spot for books written by tough, honest women who bring an inner sense of who they are and what’s different and unusual around them. I also appreciate simply told memoirs from fellow travelers, especially Returned Peace Corps Volunteers.
As I told the author, her timing couldn’t be better (the book drops later this month), since my Guatemalan wife and I are closing in on our 50th anniversary, making this an opportune time for me to appreciate, reflect and celebrate our matrimonial journey and what makes for a successful blended marriage.
I’ve already reviewed the author’s most recent book, Between Inca Wall, and according to the president of the National Association of Memoir Writers, Linda Joy Myers, “Evelyn LaTorre creates a masterful portrait of place―from the Montana hills to the peaks of Perú―and illustrates how place shapes us. The many lovely metaphors and descriptions throughout the book invite the reader to see through the eyes of an innocent girl as she discovers exotic, lively cultures; absorbs the colors, sounds, passion, and intensity of that new world; and allows it to change her life path.”
I could identify with the story of this twenty-one-year-old volunteer who was naïve about life and love. Although the author arrived in country as a volunteer ten years before I did (64-66), the circumstances were similar, and we both received training in Puerto Rico. Although her training initiated in Cornell University in New York and her field training in Puerto Rico was more focused on physical stamina, which included rappelling up a dam. The training must have been rigorous, as 23 of the initial 102 trainees dropped out.
In this book, the author describes her struggle to resist temptations as a good Catholic girl and dealing with her sexual desires with a local university student. I didn’t write much about “feelings” at all in my book, “Different Latitudes,” but by the end of this novel when the author realizes that she’s pregnant, I was turning the pages quickly to learn if they’d eventually get married.
The author’s wedding was arranged in just eight days in an ancient, colonial church in the colonial city of Cusco. The author describes how the wedding rings were purchased by her husband-to-be’s stepfather and the priest pronounced them man and wife. A relatively small group of Antonio’s family attended; none of the author’s friends participated due to the long distances to travel and her parents weren’t even aware of the ceremony until after the fact.
The rushed marriage ceremony resonated with me, as I had married my Guatemalan wife before leaving the Peace Corps—unbeknownst to them, of course. I was in a daze at the time and I remember the feeling of having the room filled with Ligia’s immediate family members (over 80 and I recognized 6…) and wondering what the future would bring. And my parents wouldn’t get the low- down until much later.
The author shares both the good and bad times along the way. Her experience giving birth to her son, virtually alone in Cusco, is most memorable,
But I never counted on waiting for the delivery by myself. Antonio hadn’t even seemed excited. My throat tightened. I’d married a guy who wouldn’t stay by his wife’s side during the birth of their first child. This wasn’t the way it happened in the movies, and I wanted that. Maybe this marriage had been a mistake.
Evelyn’s husband leaves his family and country for California where they encounter more than a few challenges, one of them due to a lengthy visit from her mother-in-law. For months, basic activities she’d done with Antonio, like going to the movies or concerts, were curtailed. And when he got off work, Antonio “took his mother to places he’s never invited me.” And her hurt feelings are reflected here:
Though I’d married Antonio, in part, because of how he revered his mother, neither my sons nor my husband treated me like someone to be watched over. Probably because I’d always been so independent, no one thought that I needed looking after. I wasn’t needy like Livia [the mother-in law]. However, sometimes I secretly yearned to be taken care of.
But many of those challenges are forgotten when they return to Peru together:
I embraced Arequipa and the affection shown us by Antonio’s family and friendly culture. My husband laughed and joked with his siblings. He put his arm around me, like he’d done often in our ten years together. I bubbled with lightness as I relaxed in the country where we’d first fallen in love. Time with his caring family revitalized us both.
The author dedicates an entire chapter to “Divorce” and brings up the long-debated question if matrimonies with Latina wives and male Peace Corps volunteers last longer, or in Evelyn’s case, a female PCV with a Latino husband. I’d always assumed that Latina/male volunteers were most likely to prosper since the Latinas are so focused on family and looking after the children although, in my case, she ended up working outside our home longer than I did. But the author tells a different story,
“Three couples with an Anglo wife and Latino husband, who’d spent the entirety of their married lives in a Latin American country, continued married for five decades like Antonio and me. Maybe we all knew from living in another country that there were more paths to happiness.” Evidently, Evelyn adhered to the 50% rule, “Though I might not always feel completely satisfied in love or work, as long as I was happy 50% of the time, I continued on my path forward.”
Not surprisingly, the author dedicates the book, “For my husband who left all he knew to journey with me through this adventure called life.” Pedro Tabensky, PhD, author of Happiness Personhood, Community Purpose, provides an insightful critique, “Dr. Evelyn La Torre’s book is an intimate rendition of her life. It is an intricate book, replete with candid detail that aims to show us how living with The Other can enrich our lives and help us grow, even if the going is at times rough…”
About the Author
Evelyn Kohl LaTorre holds a doctorate in multicultural education from the University of San Francisco and a master’s degree in social welfare from UC Berkeley. After serving in the Peace Corps in Peru, she worked as a bilingual school psychologist and school administrator in public education in California for thirty-two years. Now retired, Evelyn loves to travel; to date, she and her husband have traveled to nearly 100 countries together. Her writing has appeared in Conscious Connection Magazine, WorldView Magazine, The Delta Kappa Gamma Bulletin, the California Writers Club Literary Review, the Tri-City Voice, Dispatches, and Clever Magazine. You can view her stories and photos on her website, www.evelynlatorre.com. Evelyn currently resides in Fremont, CA.
________________________________________
Product details
• Publisher : She Writes Press (September 28, 2021)
• Language : English
• Paperback : 320 pages
• ISBN-10 : 1647421950
• ISBN-13 : 978-1647421953
• Item Weight : 15.2 ounces
• Dimensions : 5.43 x 0.94 x 8.43 inches
• Best Sellers Rank: #1,798,432 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
o #8,652 in Love & Romance (Books)
o #8,780 in Marriage
o #34,522 in Personal Transformation Self-Help
o
The Reviewer:
Mark Walker was a Peace Corps Volunteer in Guatemala and spent over forty years helping disadvantaged people in the developing world. He came to Phoenix as a Senior Director for Food for the Hungry, worked with other groups like Make-A-Wish International and was the CEO of Hagar USA, a Christian-based organization that supports survivors of human trafficking.
His book, Different Latitudes: My Life in the Peace Corps and Beyond, was recognized by the Arizona Literary Association for Non-Fiction and, according to the Midwest Review, “…is more than just another travel memoir. It is an engaged and engaging story of one man’s physical and spiritual journey of self-discovery…”
Several of his articles have been published in Ragazine and WorldView Magazines, Literary Yard, Literary Travelers and Quail BELL, while another was recognized by the “Solas Literary Awards for Best Travel Writing.” His reviews have been published by Revue Magazine, as well as Peace Corps Worldwide, and he has his own column in the Arizona Authors Association newsletter, “The Million Mile Walker Review: What We’re Reading and Why.”
His honors include the "Service Above Self" award from Rotary International. He’s a board member of “Advance Guatemala.” His wife and three children were born in Guatemala. You can learn more at www.MillionMileWalker.com and follow him on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/millionmilew...
As I told the author, her timing couldn’t be better (the book drops later this month), since my Guatemalan wife and I are closing in on our 50th anniversary, making this an opportune time for me to appreciate, reflect and celebrate our matrimonial journey and what makes for a successful blended marriage.
I’ve already reviewed the author’s most recent book, Between Inca Wall, and according to the president of the National Association of Memoir Writers, Linda Joy Myers, “Evelyn LaTorre creates a masterful portrait of place―from the Montana hills to the peaks of Perú―and illustrates how place shapes us. The many lovely metaphors and descriptions throughout the book invite the reader to see through the eyes of an innocent girl as she discovers exotic, lively cultures; absorbs the colors, sounds, passion, and intensity of that new world; and allows it to change her life path.”
I could identify with the story of this twenty-one-year-old volunteer who was naïve about life and love. Although the author arrived in country as a volunteer ten years before I did (64-66), the circumstances were similar, and we both received training in Puerto Rico. Although her training initiated in Cornell University in New York and her field training in Puerto Rico was more focused on physical stamina, which included rappelling up a dam. The training must have been rigorous, as 23 of the initial 102 trainees dropped out.
In this book, the author describes her struggle to resist temptations as a good Catholic girl and dealing with her sexual desires with a local university student. I didn’t write much about “feelings” at all in my book, “Different Latitudes,” but by the end of this novel when the author realizes that she’s pregnant, I was turning the pages quickly to learn if they’d eventually get married.
The author’s wedding was arranged in just eight days in an ancient, colonial church in the colonial city of Cusco. The author describes how the wedding rings were purchased by her husband-to-be’s stepfather and the priest pronounced them man and wife. A relatively small group of Antonio’s family attended; none of the author’s friends participated due to the long distances to travel and her parents weren’t even aware of the ceremony until after the fact.
The rushed marriage ceremony resonated with me, as I had married my Guatemalan wife before leaving the Peace Corps—unbeknownst to them, of course. I was in a daze at the time and I remember the feeling of having the room filled with Ligia’s immediate family members (over 80 and I recognized 6…) and wondering what the future would bring. And my parents wouldn’t get the low- down until much later.
The author shares both the good and bad times along the way. Her experience giving birth to her son, virtually alone in Cusco, is most memorable,
But I never counted on waiting for the delivery by myself. Antonio hadn’t even seemed excited. My throat tightened. I’d married a guy who wouldn’t stay by his wife’s side during the birth of their first child. This wasn’t the way it happened in the movies, and I wanted that. Maybe this marriage had been a mistake.
Evelyn’s husband leaves his family and country for California where they encounter more than a few challenges, one of them due to a lengthy visit from her mother-in-law. For months, basic activities she’d done with Antonio, like going to the movies or concerts, were curtailed. And when he got off work, Antonio “took his mother to places he’s never invited me.” And her hurt feelings are reflected here:
Though I’d married Antonio, in part, because of how he revered his mother, neither my sons nor my husband treated me like someone to be watched over. Probably because I’d always been so independent, no one thought that I needed looking after. I wasn’t needy like Livia [the mother-in law]. However, sometimes I secretly yearned to be taken care of.
But many of those challenges are forgotten when they return to Peru together:
I embraced Arequipa and the affection shown us by Antonio’s family and friendly culture. My husband laughed and joked with his siblings. He put his arm around me, like he’d done often in our ten years together. I bubbled with lightness as I relaxed in the country where we’d first fallen in love. Time with his caring family revitalized us both.
The author dedicates an entire chapter to “Divorce” and brings up the long-debated question if matrimonies with Latina wives and male Peace Corps volunteers last longer, or in Evelyn’s case, a female PCV with a Latino husband. I’d always assumed that Latina/male volunteers were most likely to prosper since the Latinas are so focused on family and looking after the children although, in my case, she ended up working outside our home longer than I did. But the author tells a different story,
“Three couples with an Anglo wife and Latino husband, who’d spent the entirety of their married lives in a Latin American country, continued married for five decades like Antonio and me. Maybe we all knew from living in another country that there were more paths to happiness.” Evidently, Evelyn adhered to the 50% rule, “Though I might not always feel completely satisfied in love or work, as long as I was happy 50% of the time, I continued on my path forward.”
Not surprisingly, the author dedicates the book, “For my husband who left all he knew to journey with me through this adventure called life.” Pedro Tabensky, PhD, author of Happiness Personhood, Community Purpose, provides an insightful critique, “Dr. Evelyn La Torre’s book is an intimate rendition of her life. It is an intricate book, replete with candid detail that aims to show us how living with The Other can enrich our lives and help us grow, even if the going is at times rough…”
About the Author
Evelyn Kohl LaTorre holds a doctorate in multicultural education from the University of San Francisco and a master’s degree in social welfare from UC Berkeley. After serving in the Peace Corps in Peru, she worked as a bilingual school psychologist and school administrator in public education in California for thirty-two years. Now retired, Evelyn loves to travel; to date, she and her husband have traveled to nearly 100 countries together. Her writing has appeared in Conscious Connection Magazine, WorldView Magazine, The Delta Kappa Gamma Bulletin, the California Writers Club Literary Review, the Tri-City Voice, Dispatches, and Clever Magazine. You can view her stories and photos on her website, www.evelynlatorre.com. Evelyn currently resides in Fremont, CA.
________________________________________
Product details
• Publisher : She Writes Press (September 28, 2021)
• Language : English
• Paperback : 320 pages
• ISBN-10 : 1647421950
• ISBN-13 : 978-1647421953
• Item Weight : 15.2 ounces
• Dimensions : 5.43 x 0.94 x 8.43 inches
• Best Sellers Rank: #1,798,432 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
o #8,652 in Love & Romance (Books)
o #8,780 in Marriage
o #34,522 in Personal Transformation Self-Help
o
The Reviewer:
Mark Walker was a Peace Corps Volunteer in Guatemala and spent over forty years helping disadvantaged people in the developing world. He came to Phoenix as a Senior Director for Food for the Hungry, worked with other groups like Make-A-Wish International and was the CEO of Hagar USA, a Christian-based organization that supports survivors of human trafficking.
His book, Different Latitudes: My Life in the Peace Corps and Beyond, was recognized by the Arizona Literary Association for Non-Fiction and, according to the Midwest Review, “…is more than just another travel memoir. It is an engaged and engaging story of one man’s physical and spiritual journey of self-discovery…”
Several of his articles have been published in Ragazine and WorldView Magazines, Literary Yard, Literary Travelers and Quail BELL, while another was recognized by the “Solas Literary Awards for Best Travel Writing.” His reviews have been published by Revue Magazine, as well as Peace Corps Worldwide, and he has his own column in the Arizona Authors Association newsletter, “The Million Mile Walker Review: What We’re Reading and Why.”
His honors include the "Service Above Self" award from Rotary International. He’s a board member of “Advance Guatemala.” His wife and three children were born in Guatemala. You can learn more at www.MillionMileWalker.com and follow him on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/millionmilew...
May 29, 2022
Suzanne Marriott
This is a book I could not put down. Every page in LaTorre’s candid and insightful memoir is full of surprises as she leads the reader through the ups and downs of her cross-cultural marriage on her journey through life with her Peruvian husband. I was drawn to discover if this marriage could be saved as I learned of their many cultural and personality challenges. A we follow Evelyn from young adulthood to mature mother and wife, we are afforded a privileged glimpse into the life of a most remarkable woman who relentlessly pursued higher education and career advancement while supporting her husband’s education and raising two gifted children. Her successes are astounding and inspirational.
In some ways parts of this book are a travelog through Peru, and we learn of its customs and people through Evelyn’s Peace Corp experiences and her later travels back to this country she loves. It is a compelling accounting told with insight, respect, and understanding. We are privileged to witness her Peruvian wedding and to meet her unconventional in-laws. While I probably will never be fortunate enough to visit Peru, I have gained appreciation and knowledge of Peruvian culture through Evelyn’s revealing writings. Her story serves as an inspiration to us all to follow our dreams and passions.
This is a book I could not put down. Every page in LaTorre’s candid and insightful memoir is full of surprises as she leads the reader through the ups and downs of her cross-cultural marriage on her journey through life with her Peruvian husband. I was drawn to discover if this marriage could be saved as I learned of their many cultural and personality challenges. A we follow Evelyn from young adulthood to mature mother and wife, we are afforded a privileged glimpse into the life of a most remarkable woman who relentlessly pursued higher education and career advancement while supporting her husband’s education and raising two gifted children. Her successes are astounding and inspirational.
In some ways parts of this book are a travelog through Peru, and we learn of its customs and people through Evelyn’s Peace Corp experiences and her later travels back to this country she loves. It is a compelling accounting told with insight, respect, and understanding. We are privileged to witness her Peruvian wedding and to meet her unconventional in-laws. While I probably will never be fortunate enough to visit Peru, I have gained appreciation and knowledge of Peruvian culture through Evelyn’s revealing writings. Her story serves as an inspiration to us all to follow our dreams and passions.
September 29, 2021
5/5 ⭐
I never ever read a memoir in my life because I thought it would be boring. I didn't even see myself picking up a memoir at my local bookstore fear that I just wasting my money buying it then could never finish the book.
But thanks to @booksforwardpr , I thought why not I just try this book.
And I must say there's no regret.
Reading someone life experience can be very insightful. Yes, the author and I live in a completely different culture and religious belief, but it did shed some light on how life as a woman back then or life generally. Life is not thay straightforward as it seems. If we are on that journey. It really gonna be a roller coaster ride.
I must say, the author is really brave living and married with a man that come from other country and completely has a different culture, given during that time when people don't really accept a cross-cultural marriage (I speak for myself-given that people in my circle still skeptical about it).
What people potray on the social media sometimes might not be true. Married to someone from a completely different culture and country is hard. A lot of compromise needed to make it work.
This book also shows that life is about a choice, you just can't have both. There's always something to lose. i.e If you choose career, then you'll lose the time for your family.
Overall, I love this memoir and this gonna be the reason for every memoir that I'm going to pick up next in the future.
I never ever read a memoir in my life because I thought it would be boring. I didn't even see myself picking up a memoir at my local bookstore fear that I just wasting my money buying it then could never finish the book.
But thanks to @booksforwardpr , I thought why not I just try this book.
And I must say there's no regret.
Reading someone life experience can be very insightful. Yes, the author and I live in a completely different culture and religious belief, but it did shed some light on how life as a woman back then or life generally. Life is not thay straightforward as it seems. If we are on that journey. It really gonna be a roller coaster ride.
I must say, the author is really brave living and married with a man that come from other country and completely has a different culture, given during that time when people don't really accept a cross-cultural marriage (I speak for myself-given that people in my circle still skeptical about it).
What people potray on the social media sometimes might not be true. Married to someone from a completely different culture and country is hard. A lot of compromise needed to make it work.
This book also shows that life is about a choice, you just can't have both. There's always something to lose. i.e If you choose career, then you'll lose the time for your family.
Overall, I love this memoir and this gonna be the reason for every memoir that I'm going to pick up next in the future.
February 7, 2022
Evelyn Kohl LaTorre’s second memoir follows the author and Antonio, her Peruvian husband, after they leave their home in the Peruvian Andes with their infant son and relocate to the San Francisco Bay Area. Needing to survive financially while Antonio struggles to perfect his fledgling English and finish his university education, Evelyn assumes the role of head of household. Dedicated to her profession, her husband and their young family, Evelyn makes it all happen.
Antonio’s charming Peruvian personality, combined with his willingness to bend at times while sticking to his guns at others, makes the evolution of the cross-cultural marriage believable and heartwarming.
Honest and inspiring, the author takes us on the young couple’s challenging and sometimes just plain lucky path to academic, professional, and marital success.
Readers who enjoy books about strong women who pursue their goals in the face of great difficulty will find Love in Any Language: A Memoir of Cross-Cultural Marriage a testament to the strength of bicultural relationships and a salute to the enduring power of love.
Antonio’s charming Peruvian personality, combined with his willingness to bend at times while sticking to his guns at others, makes the evolution of the cross-cultural marriage believable and heartwarming.
Honest and inspiring, the author takes us on the young couple’s challenging and sometimes just plain lucky path to academic, professional, and marital success.
Readers who enjoy books about strong women who pursue their goals in the face of great difficulty will find Love in Any Language: A Memoir of Cross-Cultural Marriage a testament to the strength of bicultural relationships and a salute to the enduring power of love.
November 6, 2021
Building upon her first memoir, Between Inca Walls, where we see the young Evelyn heading to Peru as a Peace Corps volunteer, this new book brings Evelyn’s life full circle where she returns to the US with a Peruvian husband. Far more than an engaging account of cross-cultural relationships and adjustment challenges, the book is also an eye-opening and candid view into the life of a young wife and mother of the America of the 1960s and 1970s, juggling a marriage and professional aspirations and trying to find a balance between the two. LaTorre also minces no words when it comes to describing the financial challenges of a young and multicultural family trying to make it in middle-class America, where language and other barriers abound. Also, as someone who herself as navigated immigration issues in the U.S., I could relate to the experiences of LaTorre’s husband as he tries to establish himself in the US educationally and professionally. This is a layered narrative that is a must-read for those who enjoy books that explore multicultural themes and experiences.
December 3, 2021
I love memoirs and biographies. Truth is stranger than fiction and often more complicated than any fiction author could create.
If You don't believe that love is basic animal chemistry then explain how people for centuries have fallen in love with people who don't even speak their language. AND then uproot themselves to live with that love in a country they can't even work in without a great degree of waiting and difficulty.
In, Love in any Language we see the man give up his country to be in America. It is hard to take care of your family without a job and it is hard to work somewhere where you can't speak the language.
This isn't just love. This life, marriage, and aging with someone you never saw yourself with while crossing cultural and ethnic divides.
If You don't believe that love is basic animal chemistry then explain how people for centuries have fallen in love with people who don't even speak their language. AND then uproot themselves to live with that love in a country they can't even work in without a great degree of waiting and difficulty.
In, Love in any Language we see the man give up his country to be in America. It is hard to take care of your family without a job and it is hard to work somewhere where you can't speak the language.
This isn't just love. This life, marriage, and aging with someone you never saw yourself with while crossing cultural and ethnic divides.
August 16, 2021
I was reading a lot of romance books but wanted to get back into nonfiction and this was the perfect transition! Hearing all about a real-life relationship with two people working through all of the obstacles thrown at them was so rewarding. I've gone back to her first memoir now as well after getting a little glimpse into her Peace Corps experience in this book. Highly recommend if you are looking for a memoir about a powerful woman working her way through love and family while building her career!
April 21, 2022
I've started trying to read more memoirs, and this was a great one to add to my list! I haven't read much about the time during the 60s and 70s, but the author provided a lot of insight to what it was like to be a woman in those decades. Evelyn's story has a little bit of everything: humor, heartache, and a lot of love.
August 13, 2021
I've been reading more and more nonfiction lately, and I'm so glad I picked this one up! Evelyn's story is so interesting, and I loved the in-depth look into her and Antonio's marriage. Now I'm wanting to pick up her first book to read about how they met!
October 4, 2021
Full review at: https://readingourshelves.com/2021/09...
Obviously, the book is told from Evelyn’s perspective. She was born in Montana, as 1 of 6 kids in a blue collar, Roman Catholic family. Her parents moved to California as their kids got older, because they wanted them to have easier access to institutions of higher learning.
Right away we can see that, while Evelyn was raised in a pretty traditional manner, she and her family embrace a few more modern values. Not only did she expect to get a college education, but she also had her eyes on traveling internationally, and joined the Peace Corps. Not bad for a young woman in the early 1960s.
And this brings me to one of the key things I liked about this book: Evelyn was pretty ahead of her time in a lot of things. She was often juggling work and kids, and was sometimes even the breadwinner of the house. She continuously pursued higher degrees, additional certifications, more challenging jobs, and opportunities to travel – with or without her husband! She comes across as a strong woman – especially mentally.
Another interesting aspect is seeing how her work – and various things that intersect with it – evolved over the years. She started out in social work, and added psychology to the mix. She spent most of her career working within various school systems. She started out administering tests to determine students’ ability levels, and was later in charge of innovating ways to accommodate students who had different abilities. This book spans the 60s – 90s, mostly, and during that time we see new laws introduced that protect differently-abled students, and ensure their access to a public education. We also see the advent of computers, the introduction of the Meyers-Briggs personality test, and other concepts that affect Evelyn’s work.
While I found these aspects – and the international travels – fascinating, I still had a kind of “meh” feeling about some of the story. In thinking about it, I felt like every time she encountered a problem, it was solved within a page. I felt like the book lacked real conflict, basically. I’ve seen other reviewers applaud her “straightforward” writing style, so I thought maybe it was just that – she didn’t oversell or dwell on the issues. That made them feel a bit like non-issues to me, but I just kept rolling with it.
In the last pages, Evelyn puts out a thought that I hadn’t considered while in the midst of the story – but it definitely hit a chord with me, and I think it’s part of why I had trouble sympathizing with her “quick solutions.” Since the copy I read was an advanced copy, I won’t quote it directly. But the idea is that she benefited from many social nets that aren’t as easily available today – from low-cost childcare and subsidized housing to flexible work schedules and bosses that often gave her freedom to pursue what opportunities she wanted to.
Dr. Evelyn LaTorre accomplished a lot – and continues to do so, as this isn’t her first book! She was also helped by her family, and the many opportunities that were available to an educated woman at the time. If you have any interests in education or social work, I would definitely recommend her story.
Obviously, the book is told from Evelyn’s perspective. She was born in Montana, as 1 of 6 kids in a blue collar, Roman Catholic family. Her parents moved to California as their kids got older, because they wanted them to have easier access to institutions of higher learning.
Right away we can see that, while Evelyn was raised in a pretty traditional manner, she and her family embrace a few more modern values. Not only did she expect to get a college education, but she also had her eyes on traveling internationally, and joined the Peace Corps. Not bad for a young woman in the early 1960s.
And this brings me to one of the key things I liked about this book: Evelyn was pretty ahead of her time in a lot of things. She was often juggling work and kids, and was sometimes even the breadwinner of the house. She continuously pursued higher degrees, additional certifications, more challenging jobs, and opportunities to travel – with or without her husband! She comes across as a strong woman – especially mentally.
Another interesting aspect is seeing how her work – and various things that intersect with it – evolved over the years. She started out in social work, and added psychology to the mix. She spent most of her career working within various school systems. She started out administering tests to determine students’ ability levels, and was later in charge of innovating ways to accommodate students who had different abilities. This book spans the 60s – 90s, mostly, and during that time we see new laws introduced that protect differently-abled students, and ensure their access to a public education. We also see the advent of computers, the introduction of the Meyers-Briggs personality test, and other concepts that affect Evelyn’s work.
While I found these aspects – and the international travels – fascinating, I still had a kind of “meh” feeling about some of the story. In thinking about it, I felt like every time she encountered a problem, it was solved within a page. I felt like the book lacked real conflict, basically. I’ve seen other reviewers applaud her “straightforward” writing style, so I thought maybe it was just that – she didn’t oversell or dwell on the issues. That made them feel a bit like non-issues to me, but I just kept rolling with it.
In the last pages, Evelyn puts out a thought that I hadn’t considered while in the midst of the story – but it definitely hit a chord with me, and I think it’s part of why I had trouble sympathizing with her “quick solutions.” Since the copy I read was an advanced copy, I won’t quote it directly. But the idea is that she benefited from many social nets that aren’t as easily available today – from low-cost childcare and subsidized housing to flexible work schedules and bosses that often gave her freedom to pursue what opportunities she wanted to.
Dr. Evelyn LaTorre accomplished a lot – and continues to do so, as this isn’t her first book! She was also helped by her family, and the many opportunities that were available to an educated woman at the time. If you have any interests in education or social work, I would definitely recommend her story.
September 19, 2021
A young American woman joins the Peace Corps and completes a stint in Peru. She finds love with young Peruvian man, whom she marries; they embark on a life adventure. This sounds like a movie or a novel, but it's the real-life story of Evelyn Kohl La Torre as outlined in Love in Any Language: A Memoir of a Cross-Cultural Marriage.
The 1960s were a time of change and adjustment. La Torre had many acclimations as a young bride, compounded by bringing her husband, Antonio, to the US. They also started a family shortly after their nuptials. It was a hefty load for the young couple and the author is candid with her feelings as they faced new challenges. She experienced frustration, exasperation, and impatience, but also joy and excitement, especially with the birth of their two sons.
Marriage is a constant puzzle in how to fit together different pieces. La Torre and Antonio encountered many obstacles, including housing and transportation issues and shifting employment. Both pursued advanced degrees while juggling a family. I found it revealing that an intrepid woman like La Torre grappled with being the main breadwinner, yet yearned to spend more time with her sons. Her husband struggled to find permanent employment, even spending a year in Peru for a job—which strained the marriage.
La Torre's memoir is an insightful example of two partners who made it work, despite cultural differences. Love in Any Language is a good study in relationships. It highlights tenacity, perseverance, and commitment despite differences that sometimes threatened to engulf the marriage.
Story Circle Book Reviews thanks Janilyn Kocher for this review.
The 1960s were a time of change and adjustment. La Torre had many acclimations as a young bride, compounded by bringing her husband, Antonio, to the US. They also started a family shortly after their nuptials. It was a hefty load for the young couple and the author is candid with her feelings as they faced new challenges. She experienced frustration, exasperation, and impatience, but also joy and excitement, especially with the birth of their two sons.
Marriage is a constant puzzle in how to fit together different pieces. La Torre and Antonio encountered many obstacles, including housing and transportation issues and shifting employment. Both pursued advanced degrees while juggling a family. I found it revealing that an intrepid woman like La Torre grappled with being the main breadwinner, yet yearned to spend more time with her sons. Her husband struggled to find permanent employment, even spending a year in Peru for a job—which strained the marriage.
La Torre's memoir is an insightful example of two partners who made it work, despite cultural differences. Love in Any Language is a good study in relationships. It highlights tenacity, perseverance, and commitment despite differences that sometimes threatened to engulf the marriage.
Story Circle Book Reviews thanks Janilyn Kocher for this review.
January 1, 2022
This book was unfortunately not really very interesting to me. I enjoy learning about other cultures, and thought that a story about a marriage between two young people, one American and one from Peru would be an interesting story filled with much to learn about the two cultures and the creation of a new family in the 1960s when America was not even close to embracing diversity. Instead of diving in to the differences and trying to help readers understand the challenges she and her husband faced, the author often skimmed the surface and did not explore why these difficulties occurred. I also found it a bit annoying how naive the author and her husband were, I know it is an honest retelling, as a memoir should be, but it was just so frustrating! They keep finding themselves in completely avoidable situations like not having any job prospects or moving in to an adult-only apartment while 5 months pregnant or not planning ahead for how to pay back a stipend when fully aware that the conditions of the loan weren’t met. I know we all make mistakes when we are young but for a book that intends to teach how to communicate and understand multiple cultures, I just couldn’t get past the constant miscommunications and misperceptions this couple faced again and again. I feel that more evidence of hindsight or anecdotal pieces about how they worked through these challenges or what they learned would have gone a long way in making the story more endearing. Not quite what I was expecting, but I do appreciate having been giving the opportunity to read and review this book through Netgalley and the publisher!
May 2, 2023
This amazing book follows Evelyn and Antonio LaTorre’s merging of two different cultures for a successful marriage. She was somewhat impulsive and strived to attain huge career goals. Antonio was more inclined to ponder an issue before making a decision. When Antonio arrived in the US from Peru he had very little secondary education, knew very little English and struggled to find challenging employment. With his wife’s support he was able to a obtain a higher education and gain meaningful employment. I felt like I was riveted to the book as the author describes their lives and the way they made their marriage work in an age of divorce. This is an excellent book I highly recommend.
April 10, 2024
Am interesting account of a couple who met and married, but were very different. Mostly because of cultural differences. But personalities differ. Values differ. So it's a good read, even if your partner did not come from a different country and culture.
November 18, 2025
I felt like this book fell kinda flat for me? I was excited to read it since she lived in Cusco. Based on the title, I was expecting to read a more about the dynamics of living cross culturally… But I felt like the memoir became more about her career goals and personal life.
August 9, 2022
I think this is a wonderful book. You can see my interview with Evelyn Kohl LaTorre here on YT:
https://youtu.be/74Z8X6kMI0I
https://youtu.be/74Z8X6kMI0I
June 4, 2025
It was nice to see how Evelyn’s story continued. I actually read this a long time ago, so can’t remember a lot of details, but I do remember loving it.
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