I have been waiting for a book like this for many years. I have spent most of my 40+ years "missing my life" and Cory Muscara has written a book that is easy to follow, and full of insight to help me, and all of you , "stop missing your life." His teachings are clear and direct and he shares many thought provoking concepts like the FACE model to help cultivate presence. In the book, he reminded me how my past traumas, whether they are big or little T's, have impacted my current state of presence. He also provides ways to navigate this journey of life so that we can learn to move through the experience rather than being locking into or tied to the experience.
"Good enough" healing is something that I believe everyone needs to know about. Hearing Cory explain that you do not need to fix, heal, or solve everything in order to be fully present, gave me the permission I needed to relax into this moment and feel satisfied that I'm not doing it all wrong because I still feel anger at times. Anger exists. Sadness exists. As Cory says, this is all part of being human!
Throughout the book, Cory walks me through, as though he was sitting next to me on my couch, holding my hand every step of the way, techniques to help me find ways to cultivate presence through being present in my body, the emotions, and the experience. He provides step-by-step strategies for everyone to apply no matter where you are in your journey.
He shares that the shift in the ability to sit "with" an experience, rather than "be" in the experience, can benefit our ability to live a more fulfilling life. Cory says early on in the book that there is a "risk to being our true selves" and that "being a human is hard." I find these phrases to be a so simple yet so very powerful. I believe wholeheartedly in those words. It is super hard to be a human! It's especially hard in this fast passed, digital, immediate gratification, over-worked under cared for, anxiety ridden world we are in. But, Cory gives us practical techniques to befriend technology. Even more than that, he suggests we make peace with our phones rather than trying to fight the technology tide. Not only is "scollercoaster" my new favorite word this decade, but it's also perfectly describes the wave of emotions I feel as I spend 15 mindless minutes looking at everyone's 2019 best nine on Instagram pictures feeling every emotion possible.
Cory also offers easy techniques to help befriend technology - simple, logical suggestions like - turn off your notifications so your phone doesn't buzz or light up every time someone "likes" your pictures, reduce the clutter on your screen - use folders and organize the pages according to themes; and my personal favorite idea - only follow people who inspire and nourish your soul on social media! This is a surefire way to cultivate presence and in turn bring gratitude to your experience. I will doing this for sure in the next 15 minutes!
I have seen Cory speak publicly and attended numerous retreats of his, and it is obvious that Cory worked hard to stay true to the man he is and his teachings, because his compassion and loving manner come through every single word on the page. I also love how he is able to add just the right about of humor and silliness to his stories, experiences, and teachings making them more relatable and true to life.
Stop Missing Your Life is a book that will stand the test of time. It is one that can be read and reread numerous times and with each read, you will gain more insight and be able to apply the teachings to your current level of healing. This book will be around for the long haul right next to Jon Kabat-Zinn's Full Catastrophe Living and Be Here Now by the late Ram Dass. You do not need to be spiritual or a meditator to gain insight from this book. This book is written for anyone looking to live a life with deeper presence.
I couldn't recommend this book more! You won't be disappointed!