Humans are coded for relational connection with other humans. Often that coding has been short circuited and needs reactivating. However, we do not need to learn it, we need to relearn it. This is not a new language; it is the language of your birth. The Connection Codes are the blueprint and tools for the relational connection we all need and crave. They are the culmination of over 30 years of research, education and experience and draw from many centuries of insights and wisdom. The Connection Codes are experiential not just conceptual. The power is not in the knowledge; the power is in the relational interaction. Experience Assignments are included at the end of each section to help apply these concepts. This is a simple process; it is not an easy one. Returning to your original coding may be the most challenging, yet rewarding, thing you ever do. You need this. You deserve this. Let’s do this!
I listened to the audiobook, which is read by the author and I found the information to be helpful and insightful. However, I didn’t love the writing style. Some sentences, phrases and exercise examples were repeated over and over. The redundancy was a bit off putting.
I chose this book because someone recommended it and I wanted to grow in communication.
There are some helpful things regarding communication. I was very interested at first as it is very practical, but overall it left me feeling confused.
I think this is because it conflicted with what Scripture calls us to—self-denial, self-sacrifice, losing our lives to gain them, considering others interests above our own, etc. I found myself unable to apply the principles without focusing on myself and my rights and my feelings.
Another note is that the authors talk about the “connection codes” (the principle they teach, not the book) as if it is going to save the world. They are Believers, but their platform isn’t specifically for Christians. This book would not at all offend an unbeliever which means it is devoid of Christ, Scripture, and the Holy Spirit.
As Christ is the Creator of our brains and emotions, I believe He is sufficient for them! And it’s so much simpler to trust the Word of God and His Spirit than to worry about some new code.
I have never read a book more challenging than this. Nor have I ever read a book that seemed to speak directly to me and the issues I've faced in relationships.
When it comes to relationships (especially romantic) our biggest enemy is our past, not our partners. This book shows how to navigate those triggering events during conflict and find a lasting resolution. This book is an absolute MUST for anyone struggling in relationships.
It's also a short read.
My only complaint is how Dr. Glenn talks about identity. It drives me up a wall. I can't stand it. No one can cause you to lose identity.
Good basics and overview of communication if you’ve not read anything else on the topic. Easy first nibble if you’re wanting to work on improving your relationships.
NOTE: I strongly disliked how the book uses the term “identity.” It was distracting and seemed nonsensical to me. I think “sense of self-worth,” “self-esteem,” or even “value” would have been better choices. Regardless of the term, feeling a loss of what the book calls identity is based on our own upbringing, personal history and subjective perception of what is happening - it is not caused by others. Not sure how clear the book was on this point. Felt muddy. Might have been because I was so disturbed by the word choice.
An incredibly impactful book. Definitely need to read it more than once. Dr. Glen and Phyllis are amazing and the tools they will teach you will work in time as you implement them. So thankful for this book and them!
This book is a easy read but profoundly insightful. The connection code provides techniques that can be applied to improve any relationship from co-workers, friends, family and spouses.
The concepts described in this book have changed my life! I’ve never been more in touch with my emotions or my body before! I’m now the healthiest version of myself I’ve ever been!