Finding Ruhi: Nature and Nurture in the Search for My Bio-Father

by J. Dylan Moro

When Dylan Moro spit into a test tube and sent it away to learn more about his DNA and his family’s ethnic lineage, he never anticipated the results would tell him he was half Jewish—and kick off a search for the biological father he never knew he had. Dylan had always taken his origin story as the one and only truth, that he was born in 1983 as the firstborn son of Debra and Johnny Moro, and that he was eldest Moro brother to siblings Jerri, Julian, and Lena. Armed only with a poet’s penname and the title of a long-lost book, and determined to be able to provide his newborn daughter Zuzu with an accurate family history, Dylan embarks on a two-year search for a new way to understand his story. Along the way, his relationships with his mom Debra and dad Johnny, the man who raised him as his own son, only grow deeper and stronger. This is a story about how truth is in the eye of the beholder, how history has a way of finding the light, and how there is more than one way to define family.--Shelley MannWhen the Moro force plowed into our tiny mountain town, we knew we'd be richer for it. They settled in like they'd always been there, collecting unlikely friends and assorted local characters into their brand of beautiful, boisterous chaos. I've always thought of Dylan as the product of Deb's kind heart and John's determined eccentricity. Growing up, Dylan was remarkably small in size with enormous talent and determination that kept us all guessing at what sort of adventure he’d go on next. In this chapter of his story, he takes the sort of revelation that would send the best of us spiraling into an existential crisis and uses it to build unity and richness beautifully—and some would say unexpectedly. But it’s not unexpected if you know Dylan. I’m not surprised that he pivoted, regrouped, and built a silver lining. Of course it was not without a little trash talk.--Arminda LathropAbout the AuthorJ. Dylan Moro is a science teacher who lives in Spearfish, South Dakota, with his wife Keena and daughter Zuzu. This is his first book. He enjoys fam time, being a dad, and rolling a bike in the Black Hills and Badlands while humming a tune.

269 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 13, 2021

Reviews

[Jessica Magelky · Rating 5 out of 5]

My first thought in reading this book was: to know Dylan is to understand his verbal rhythm and turns of phrase, and this book reads just like he sounds. Having worked with Dylan, I was familiar with the premise of the story as it unfolded, but this is a case where the devil is in the details and reading the full story with all the successes and frustrations is what makes the whole thing come together. This is so much more than a tale of a man finding out about his genetic history and the journey to fill in the blanks...which was what I was expecting. Rather, it is a deep dive into the theory of nature vs. nurture and, in this case, perhaps vs. luck. This is a truly balanced story--Dylan brings his scientific background paired with his familial artsy nature. Dylan's sheer drive and need to succeed in his quest is juxtaposed with brick walls and Ruhi's eventual repetition that some things that we worry about maybe don't matter as much to everyone else. Is this the next great American writing? Nope...even Dylan will acknowledge that. Did the story serve its overarching multifaceted goals? You bet. In the end, the reader doesn't get all happiness and rainbows, but when do we? Instead, we get to look at one human's experience and hopefully question where we fit in, what truly matters, and what is it that makes us "us."

[Victoria Bower · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m so moved by this book! As one of Lena’s / Deebs (Dylan’s youngest sister) best friends and close family friend to the Moros, I had even more intense enthusiasm for this book stemming from my love for investigative journalism and memoirs.

Dylan’s writing is so intimate and vulnerable while also being relatable and light-hearted!

What a grand adventure and necessary reminder that family can look many different ways and all the types of love we experience through life are a great gift!

So happy for you Dylan!

[Karen Byrd · Rating 5 out of 5]

Finding Ruhi gives the reader not just the steps Dylan went through to find his biological father but the thoughts and connections to his past and even future. Writing this book for his daughter to help her have a complete sense is family was a selfless act that through the pain and happiness of the journey made it worth it! I throughly enjoyed the walk!