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187 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1977
"Her name itself whispered rumours of inexpressible sadness; the lingering sibilants rustled like the doomed petticoats of a young girl who is dying."
"Tristessa. Enigma. Illusion. Woman? Ah!...and all you signified was false! Your existence was only notional; you were a piece of pure mystification, Tristessa. Nevertheless, [you were] as beautiful as only things that don't exist can be, most haunting of paradoxes, that recipe for perennial dissatisfaction."
"I grew bored with her...she became a response, not a pleasure. The sickness ran its course, and I was left only with the habit of her sensuality, an addiction of which I was half ashamed."
"She was a perfect woman; like the moon, she only gave reflected light. She had mimicked me, she had become the thing I wanted of her, so that she could make me love her and yet she had mimicked the fatal lack in me that meant I was not able to love her because I myself was so unlovable."
"So hypocrites that we were, we spared ourselves the final hypocrisy of love. Or, I saved myself from that most brutal of all assaults, the siege of the other."
"Mother has made herself into an incarnated deity; she has quite transformed her flesh, she has undergone a painful metamorphosis of the entire body and become the abstraction of a natural principle."
"I left the desert, the domain of the sun, the arena of metaphysics, the place where I became myself."
"… where I remembered my cock, was nothing. Only a void, an insistent absence, like a noisy silence."
"You were an illusion in a void. You were the living image of the entire Platonic shadow show, an illusion that could fill my own emptiness with marvelous, imaginary things as long as, just so long as, the movie lasted, and then all would vanish… [You yourself would live only] as long as ‘persistence of vision’."
"She had wandered endlessly within herself, but never met anybody, nobody…She who has been so beautiful consumed me. Solitude and melancholy, that is a woman’s life."
"When I saw Tristessa was a man, I felt a great wonder since I witnessed, as in a revelation, the grand abstraction of desire in this person who represented the refined essence of all images of love and the dream."
"Masculine and feminine are correlatives which involve one another. I am sure of that - the quality and its negation are locked in necessity. But what the nature of masculine and the nature of feminine might be, whether they involve male and female...still I do not know the answer to these questions. They bewilder me."
"We folded ourselves within a single self in the desert…We now projected upon each other’s flesh, selves – aspects of being, ideas – that seemed, during our embraces, to be the very essence of our selves; the concentrated essence of being, as if, out of these fathomless kisses and our interpenetrating, undifferentiated sex, we had made the great Platonic hermaphrodite together, the whole and perfect being to which he, with an absurd and touching heroism, had, in his own single self, aspired; we brought into being the being who stops time in the self-created eternity of lovers."
"Ocean, ocean, mother of mysteries, bear me to the place of birth."
"Masculine and feminine are correlatives which involve one another. I am sure of that-the quality and its negation are locked in necessity. But what the nature of masculine and the nature of feminine might be, whether they involve male and female, if they have anything to do with Tristessa's so long neglected apparatus or my own factory fresh incision and engine-turned breasts, that I do not know. Though I have been both man and woman, still I do not know the answer to these questions. Still they bewilder me."