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New First Three Years of Life: The Completely Revised and Updated Edition of the Parenting Classic

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The most important guide to the early childhood development of infants and toddlers ever written, from expert Burton L. White.

F irst published in 1975, The First Three Years of Life became an instant classic. Based on Burton White's thirty-seven years of observation and research, this detailed guide to the month-by-month mental, physical, social, and emotional development of infants and toddlers has supported and guided hundreds of thousands of parents. Now completely revised and updated, it contains the most accurate information and advice available on raising and nurturing the very young child. White gives parents real-world-tested advice

* Creating a stimulating environment for your infant and toddler
* Using effective, age-appropriate discipline techniques
* How to handle sleep problems
* What toys you should (and should not) buy
* How to encourage healthy social development
* How and when to toilet-train

No parent who cares about a child's well-being can afford to be without this book.

384 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1985

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199 people want to read

About the author

Burton L. White

18 books2 followers

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5 stars
79 (41%)
4 stars
63 (32%)
3 stars
37 (19%)
2 stars
9 (4%)
1 star
4 (2%)
Displaying 1 - 28 of 28 reviews
Profile Image for Elizabeth Plumberg.
18 reviews1 follower
November 17, 2013
This is an excellent resource for those interested in learning more about normal growth and development in children 0-3 years old. The Parents as Teacher's program which piloted in Missouri back in the 80's when I was raising my own children used this as the main resource for the handouts given to parents. These handouts gave great G&D information and how to encourage a child's progress through these 7 phases covering Birth to 3.

While the information is excellent and something I am very interested in, I found the presentation some what lacking in that it is repetitious and not organized in a way that makes it easy to go back and find information again when desired, so it was a bit of a chore to get through at times. (Maybe this is b/c I read it on my Kindle. I have since purchased a hard copy of the book.)

In the second section of the book Dr. White touches on subjects related to child rearing. Much of his advice is logical, common sense backed up by his research. Some however, I considered more opinion-based and I didn't always agree. The spiritual aspect of human behavior is completely missing from the book, as you might expect and as such his views can only be informed so far. Christian parents will want to read carefully to separate conclusions based on observations from the research from those that come from the application of a differing worldview or that reach beyond the scope of research.

Overall, I liked the book and found it useful in rounding out my own understanding of little people aged 3 and under.
2 reviews
March 10, 2025
In addition to this book, my wife & I took the “New Parents As Teachers” class with Dr. White that the book mentions on page 167. NPAT was with 9 other first time parents (so the parents wouldn’t have to break bad habits) of nearly identically aged newborns (so the babies were in the same stage). We met at Dr. White’s home monthly, and Dr. White instructed us on what was coming and what to buy {and not buy). He would come to our home monthly with a grad student to observe and make suggestions. Results: 35 years later all 5 of my kids graduated from the top Magnet School with 49 other brilliant students in a university city of more than 300,000. First child is Pediatric Cardiologist with 18 published journal articles from THE top program. Second is Mechanical Engineer with Master's & 2 patents, Third is Electrical Engineering grad with 1 patent, 2 papers, and 2 promotions in 3 years, Fourth and Fifth (twins) are getting Masters in Engineering.1 of the 2 says his advisor told him he was the most brilliant student he’s ever had.
The results are so good I am concerned humanity may lose Dr. White’s advances. Please buy the book to keep it in print!
Best toys:
Unbreakable mirror so the image is always changing
Beach ball once the baby is crawling.
My phone number is (859) 699-6666 if you want to call me and talk about Dr. White’s work. I feel that strongly about it.
Profile Image for Dani.
36 reviews
April 11, 2024
I’ll be reading this for years, what a fascinating and supportive resource for a first-time parent. I love how White focuses on sensible tools and information, being very clear on what developmentally is at risk and what is not. For someone who leans toward anxiety about what’s right for my child, I find this book very soothing and helpful. The way he writes with both clinical specificity and obvious joy and delight for babies continually makes me chuckle. Also, it’s remarkable how little has changed from his recommendations since this was revised in the 90’s. As far as I can tell, only the safe sleep policies have been drastically changed. He was ahead of his time.
Profile Image for Tia.
115 reviews
September 5, 2021
If you, like me, are a first-time parent, you'll likely find this book very helpful - this book made me a much better parent. I found no other book more supportive for me to support the development of my child - the book covers practical topics separated by age range from newborn to age 3 - e.g. how to spend time with your child; how to support your child's mental, emotional/physical development; which toys are helpful and which toys to avoid; what is important to think about for your child; how to discipline.
144 reviews2 followers
September 5, 2024
Outdated in some respects (ex: curb bumpers), I nevertheless found the advice to be sound. Most of it is fairly straightforward but did offer some useful tips and tricks I would not have thought of on my own. I think I can give this book much of the credit for my delightful 2-yr old!
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
204 reviews
December 31, 2024
A friend gave this book to me when I became a new mom, and I started reading it the day we brought my son home from the NICU. With the oversupply of resources for new parents, and especially new moms, this book is refreshingly simple and reassuring. That said, it also feels a bit dated.
Profile Image for Christine Hill.
194 reviews
June 2, 2014
I really enjoyed this book. While White can be a little judgemental, he has the research to back it up. What I especially like about the book is that White balances discipline and learning with fun and love. His research is interested in children who are happy and smart, not just smart or not just happy. I found his section on toys very helpful. After each section he has a list of toys that is appropriate for the developmental period and usually these toys are very cheap. My son (2 years old) still loves the beach ball we got him when he was 12 months old and that was a $4 toy. We have also followed his guidelines on discipline which have worked out rather well (although I am a biased reporter). The nice thing about reading a book is you can decide which advice you are interested in implementing and which advice you will ignore. I found this book to be much more helpful than asking relatives/friends because I never had to worry about offending them if I disagreed with them. I was able to develop my own parenting style (with the help of my husband) that I am happy with. A great read as far as I am concerned. I will probably re-read it for my second child.
Profile Image for Mandy.
247 reviews18 followers
June 2, 2010
I love this book! It addresses the kind of things I am really interested in learning about as a parent. Although the what to expect books are great for the basics, I was left wanting more. I wanted to understand more about social and mental development and how to help my child grow and learn at each phase of his life. The author delves deeply into the importance of a childs development and how they learn and grow through each phase. The book is research based and sometimes can read like a text book. But, I found TONS of useful information through each chapter. I especially appreciated the ideas for games to play and how to help Mason learn new skills. I also liked the suggestions for toys that he could enjoy and how to maximize the time I spend with him. I also appreciated the emphasis he puts on having an educated caregiver who is an active participant in their childs life. It made me feel like even the most mundane daily details are making a great impact.

Many thanks to my mom for this awesome book! It is a must have for a new parent!!
95 reviews
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November 1, 2009
I have a raggedy old copy of this book. It is based largely on the work and observations of (renowned but very hard to read) Jean Piaget , and gives a wonderful window into the child's thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and processes. This book has helped me time and again to understand and really marvel at what's going on during challenging developmental stages. This is good, solid developmental psychology. And written in a way that is accessible and useful to parents without being preachy. White includes a few "childrearing recommendations." In every stage, the most important task for parents, he says, is "giving your child a sense of being loved and cared for."
Profile Image for Gretchen Decker.
4 reviews
October 5, 2009
A fantastic book on child development that manages to (gasp!) not judge your parenting style. He has a great discussion of developmental markers, what babies need, and how to have fun with your baby without buying a ridiculous amount of toys. My biggest criticism is that White does tend to repeat himself a bit, and I think the book could have been edited down substantially. A more concise version of his ideas can be found in White's, "Raising a Happy, Unspoiled Child."
Profile Image for Ansley.
12 reviews1 follower
September 3, 2013
This book has a lot of great research, but is way too long winded for a busy Mama to get through. Has some good points that could have been consolidated into about 20 pages. And bless your heart if you are expecting babies spaced fewer than three years apart, because the author is borderline rude about how you and your kids will fare. Beware!
Profile Image for Rebekah.
208 reviews6 followers
September 23, 2008
This guy is AWESOME. He doesn't hesitate to tell it how it is. He's done tons of research into early child development and translates it into practical advice that helps with discipline, eating/sleeping, toys to buy, etc. Already I'm reaping the benefits of his expertise.
Profile Image for Andrew Kinard.
3 reviews2 followers
February 12, 2013
The absolute best book on infant and early childhood development. If you are a parent, reading this book will help you play and teach your child more effectively while reducing parental stress considerably.
Profile Image for Melissa.
Author 3 books25 followers
February 17, 2009
What I really appreciate about this book is the total lack of sentimentality towards babies. For example, on tickling: "The fact that you cannot elicit a tickle response from a child before she is about fourteen weeks of age has always intrigued this author."
Profile Image for Melanie.
280 reviews
February 24, 2009
I actually read the first edition of White's book and was very impressed. He was right on track with development of young children before others. He had practical insights as to how to stimulate children's development.
Profile Image for Katharine.
136 reviews1 follower
February 6, 2010
Very good and useful book for parents to help understand each phase of life, helps give ideas to stimulate baby/toddler in a positive way and a better undertanding of the babies stage. I continue to read and refer to.
Profile Image for Sally.
596 reviews58 followers
June 10, 2010
Carol Walton gave me copy of this book in 1983 when Mandy was born. I loved it then, and I'm sure the new revised and updated version is equally as wonderful. I remember enjoying the insights and practical advice.
Profile Image for Isla McKetta.
Author 6 books56 followers
July 26, 2015
A good introduction to what to expect at various stages of early development (says the not--yet-parent). I actually appreciated how the same information was presented two ways, first in a chronological manner and then organized by type of development.
Profile Image for Sarah.
2,134 reviews
October 20, 2016
Dr. White's development and parent training research condensed to an advice book. I found the parts on earlier infancy more empirically based, and a lot of opinions coloring the toddler years. Not irrelevant, but outdated.
Profile Image for Katie.
201 reviews
March 3, 2008
One of my favorite parenting books. Seems very grounded in research and has practical suggestions. Who knew the best toy for a newly walking toddler is a cheap plastic beach ball?!
Profile Image for Cathy.
239 reviews7 followers
May 29, 2008
some good stuff in here about how many years to put in between your kids and why.
Profile Image for Renee.
221 reviews11 followers
August 12, 2009
One of the best books on child development from someone who studies their brains. Great stuff!
2 reviews3 followers
November 14, 2011
Amazing book. I've been reading this as Joe enters each "phase". Has very practical ideas on how to focus on your child's development.
Profile Image for Ashley S.
54 reviews
June 10, 2012
Has some great advice, but tends to be a bit gloom-and-doom at times. If you mess up during certain months of development, apparently your child will turn out to be a brat. Permanently.
Profile Image for Carolyn.
15 reviews1 follower
April 11, 2012
Very helpful in understanding a baby's first years before they can talk, which can ease a parent's frustrations. A quick read and handy reference!
Profile Image for Janet Richards.
22 reviews1 follower
August 3, 2013
The best information about the educational development of the infant. Excellent!
Profile Image for Christen Colquitt.
8 reviews8 followers
April 27, 2019
Helpful perspective on having siblings closely spaced together. Affirming in his thoughts on the particularly challenging (yet critical) stage of 14 to 24 months.
Displaying 1 - 28 of 28 reviews

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