I'll Die After Bingo

by Pope Lonergan

Whether he's initiating a coup d'état against new regulations with the residents, or forging a bond with the 98-year old who once called him a fat slut, Pope Lonergan work is infinitely varied. This no-holds-barred account shows what life inside a care home is really like, for both residents and carers. Featuring night-time drama, incontinence pads and the uniquely dark humour of one double-amputee Alzheimer's patient, here you can learn everything you ever wanted to know (and a few things you probably really didn't) about Britain's care system.

This important memoir challenges us all to think differently about the value of our elderly, and also the carers who look after them.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Audiobook

320 pages, Hardcover

Published June 1, 2022

Reviews

[Phil Smifff · Rating 1 out of 5]

Rarely for me I came very close to giving up on this book but managed to see it through to the end. Despite its rambling lack of structure I felt there were some interesting ideas about how care home staff and people with dementia or addiction are perceived. Overall I felt disappointed and that what I had read wasn't properly reflected in the books blurb.
The writing kept going off on little tangents which in the end didn't really enhance. It felt like instead of editing the book numerous footnotes were added. The book also includes numerous references which I think were trying to highlight the writers obvious intelligence rather than underline a particular point.

[Ruth This one · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pope presents an intelligent account of the fundamental caring profession, unexpurgated bodily fluids and scattered minds. I listened on audio and appreciated the author's authentic voice, experience, and humour.
We need to stop seeing caring as a low skilled occupation and adequately staff homes. How have we turned caring into a private equity enterprise?

[Mrs P Earle · Rating 2 out of 5]

I expected this to be more anecdotal and instead it felt like I was reading a text book with all the references. There was an overuse of words I'd never come across before. However the author does accurately depict the monotonous and thankless task of being a carer in a care home.

[Vivi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Unlike the other reviews I actually really liked the memoire style and glad he didn't shy from including his opinions and politics. I was also really happy to find references of feminism, critics of capitalism and I would say socialism but not sure how the author identifies. I'd certainly take book recommendations from him.
The personal care work stories were as just as you'd expect patients with dementia saying odd stuff so not sure why so many reviews want more of that.
I did struggle a bit to read the book and i did zone out to parts of it but can't really tell why it made me feel like that. I have this happen with some books but I haven't yet figured out a patern.

[Dave · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not as good as I thought it might be. Only occasionally funny, and most of the humour was in the footnotes, (and I'm not a fan of footnotes). The author clearly knows a lot of wonderful words that require a thesaurus to decipher. Unfortunately these too often detract from any prolonged enjoyment of the book. I'm not one for giving up on a book, but I came very close with this one.

[Donna Scott · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having visited a range of hospitals, respite care places and care homes in recent years for my dad, plus having had my own amusing catheter experiences in hospital stays of my own, I'm kind of inured to the various icky bodily topics involved when people are not capable of caring for themselves. I'm also pretty interested in social care funding - and Pope is just the sort of person who should be listened to where this is concerned. He's lived it.

People generally don't like to think about themselves or their loved ones needing this kind of care, and it's almost one of the last taboos. And care home residents (I too hate the world clients) shouldn't need to have to be 'humanized' but Pope does bring out the people so lovingly, whilst still sharing what it's like when the people he's getting to know may be disinhibited, emotional, or disconnected in ways their families don't recognize, for worse and sometimes for better.

Above all, this is a well-written, humorous and candid memoir.

All the events of the book take place before Lockdown when the plight of care homes was brought more to the fore on the news, since which time everything seems to have been forgotten again, dropped from our collective conscience. The bottom-line watching corporate model is gaining traction, meaning less money going into actual care, and more carer burn out.

Pope writes astutely on people's attitudes to minimum wage care workers, which is the opposite of happy clapping on a Thursday night. As you can expect from someone who is also a stand-up comedian, there is wry humour to Pope's story, and more than a little self-deprecation. He is brutally honest about his addictions, his failings...And his successes.

If you liked This is Going to Hurt, try this. It can only add to the picture you have of what it's like to work in the health and care sector in this country.

[Sheena · Rating 3 out of 5]

This one is close to my heart as my mam spent five years in a care home form the age of 86 to 91. She actually settled into the life reasonably well mainly keeping away from the other residents and having her meals in her room. She had slight dementia but right to the end she could have a conversation with us unless she had one of the dreaded infections. Gradually her body shut down and her world shrunk but she had a peaceful death with my sister holding her hand. I am glad I didn't have to deal with some of the situations Pope writes about and as much as he says we should know all the grisly details I would still prefer to bury my head in the sand. He is totally correct in expecting society to afford carers great respect and pay them accordingly. He did actually portray himself as the best carer in the home with the best methods and the most caring nature this did grate a little as I am sure he had more than a few moments of being human and losing the plot. However he did reedem himself by admitting this at the same time. The references to academic books on the subject and his philosopising went over my head and I was not sure they were not just there to make us realise how well read and intellectual he was as opposed to the majority of care home workers . Once again care homes have entered my life as my in laws are now bouncing between hospital and care homes. So far they have not had such a good experience as they are different characters to my mam who was quite accepting though she knew what she wanted and got it ie room service as far as I know in her home there was the usual turnover of staff and though they were kind no special bond was formed with any of them.
To be honest as the years go by it is one of the things I dread facing having to live in a care home so I am sorry but for now I will put my fingers in my ears and sing a little song

[Tony Fitzpatrick · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'll Die After Bingo: The Unlikely Story of My Decade as a Care Home Assistant by Pope Lonergan - read 16.9.22 (3/5)

Pope Lonergan is a stand up comedian from Essex, a recovering drug addict, and was for over a decade a care assistant in a variety of Care Homes. He has recounted many anecdotes from his experience in providing "end of life care" in this interesting, although not well structured book. His comedy act is based on finding humour in dealing with the realities of old age, however on the written page it all comes across as depressing and tragic, rather than funny. In this book are stories of old people rid of their inhibitions by dementia, of profit focused organisations under-paying their poorly trained staff who despite all (mostly) still try and give a good standard of care, and much on the practical realities of aging - bodies that don't work as well, and support needs that rid people of their dignity. We also get some background on the author's addiction to narcotics and his recovery. Having had some experience of visiting people in care homes, little in this book surprises me, and I share with the author much despair about the lack of sensible Government plans to fix the core issues longer term. Lonergan has now left the care home sector, burnt out he says by the grind of it all. Shame, for if his recollections are honest, he genuinely seemed to care for his residents and had a bond with many of them that would have made their last few months a little less brutal. Lord, let me age well.

[Marianne · Rating 3 out of 5]

A frank account of Pope's experience as a care home assistant and his struggle with drug addiction. Also a stand up comic, there's a surprisingly light touch to Pope's writing considering the challenging nature of his subject matter. While he shares his first hand experience, Pope also reflects on the state of the care system- it's over reliance on the underpaid and the risk of profit being prioritized over resident and staff welfare. This book has given me a renewed respect for those dedicated to a career in the care system. Pope describes how he was initially embarrassed to talk about his choice of career. I think he should be commended for deciding to share his experiences. It's clear that he feels his own vulnerability and struggles with mental health give him a heightened understanding of the plight of the 'elders' he supports- and, fundamentally a greater humility and patience.

[Alodie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Senior caregiver is the topic. He discusses the morbid humor that goes along with the job and yet he's english from Britain and so I learned so much about that type of humor. Apparently they have actual clowns as entertainment in the homes, a horrific clown captures the mood, What also is enormously funny is catching fish with bacon in the sea , which a character in this book does on his day off. I relished this and that. He's funnier than David Sedaris in this book. But there are serious parts as well. How ridiculous that the same kind of greedy and broken care system is in England as well as here. It's also about addiction and sometimes I failed to see the humor for this reason. But I love this book so much I had it from the library for a whole year

[David Cutler · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It gives a rare and very needed insight into the unbelievably unvalued work of a professional carer in a residential home. Mainly the funny stories land and he is a good writer. Just occasionally ally the erudite references and many footnotes became a little burdensome. Hugely better than the saccharine care home novels that seem to be emerging as a trend. It combines with his own history of mental health problems and addictions to remind us that carers are people not roles.

[Philip Baumbach · Rating 3 out of 5]

I chose this as part of a book club read. It is listed as being comedy. While there were a few places I did laugh out loud, I would not describe it as a funny book.
Lonergan describes some of his experiences in a care home looking after elderly people, some of whom have dementia. He describes some of the incidents and procedures very graphicly. My late Mother was in a care home for several years, but this opened my eyes to what carers have to deal with and how poorly paid they are.
It also made me fear my getting dementia as I get older.

[Caprice · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book detailing the trials and tribulations of working in the public sector. Alongside a sprinkling of the authors political view. I liked that the author was prepared to out himself and not just come off as an angel. This book made me laugh out loud in places. Definitely needs to be more books like this talking about poor pay and poor attitudes towards those on lower pay scale jobs. Can definitely relate to some of the comments in this book.

[Lucy Lyons · Rating 3 out of 5]

A worthy book, although the contents will surprise few people. For some reason this book did not grab me in the way I hoped it would, following from Adam Kay's This is Going to Hurt, it does suffer by comparison. Maybe it was because the residents he cared for didn't come alive on the page for me, maybe they weren't described in enough depth. And there are only so many mentions of incontinence I really wanted to hear!!

[Ruth · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not what I expected. I thought it would be stories about people in the care home. There were some funny bits but wish the author stayed on this path more as this is where the good bits were.

Unfortunately I found this book disappointing and it was more about the authors opinions on the care system. Lots of foot notes which were distracting.

[Helen Hay · Rating 3 out of 5]

Huge potential. But the juxtaposition between the free flowing prose when he is writing about his own experiences and the jarring change in language when he starts quoting other academics…..It makes it tricky to read and you need a dictionary! A good clear concise summary or explanation would have made this book 5 stars. You come away sometimes struggling to find the “point”.

[Helen the Bassist · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5*

An absorbing read but could have done with a little more editing in places...unless the random changes of time and place were designed to give us just a hint of the disorientation of the starts of a degenerative brain condition?

An important read but, ironically, will be looked down on by the more famous autobiographies about Doctors and Vets already on the shelf.

[Liz · Rating 1 out of 5]

I expected more tales of life in a care home, which I would have enjoyed, having volunteered in one myself. His life story didn’t interest me, nor his philosophising so I abandoned the book.
A disappointment, as the reviews of it seemed to have mentioned all the good stories.

[Rach Hyatt Hyatt · Rating 2 out of 5]

Was really looking forward to reading this expecting the equivalent to Adam Kay’s anecdotes from hospital wards. Sadly this was more about the author showing off his academic research in way too flowery language and not relaying the real life experience of working in a care home. Disappointed.

[eleanor · Rating 3 out of 5]

very good! i loved the comic angle lonergan approaches the caring profession from, and also his absolute honesty about it. i did feel like it was pretty repetitive at times, but i guess his job was quite repeated as well. also the discussion around drugs and addiction was really interesting

[susanambrose · Rating 3 out of 5]

Title of book got me interested

Well starting a boring but having worked in The carer industry got some interest in his comments
All true and what some people can expect later in life
If they can remember

[Jonny Brick · Rating 3 out of 5]

There's a masterpiece in there, but it's a cross between Adam Kay, social commentary and addiction memoir. A fine first effort, and full of truth and character, but a bit muddled.

[Alison Thomas · Rating 3 out of 5]

From the cover I was excited to be reading this but was hugely disappointed. I usually persevere with books but stopped reading as it was rambling and a bit boring. Sorry!

[Stacey. · Rating 1 out of 5]

The author seems to have included a quote from every book they’ve ever read.

[Coz · Rating 5 out of 5]

So so so funny, and so moving. My mum works in care and this really struck a chord with me

[Biblioteka Wydziału Neofilologii UW]

362/6935 OSB

[Bekah B · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'll Die After Bingo is a ...... erm..... well, it's...... oh, I don't know what it is. And I really think the author of this book doesn't know what it wants to be. It's subtitled as a story of a decade as a Care Home Assistant but it seems to be stuck in this really disjointed state of being part academic and part memoir. One second I'm reading a funny memoir about an elderly man reminiscing about a time when he seduced a random woman and 'fucked her up the arse' and the next second I'm reading about hierarchical structures and the distribution of power and autonomy in the care system. It just reads weird and doesn't flow. I do get what the author is trying to do but it just doesn't work. I don't think it's possible to have a black comedic view of healthcare, aka Adam Kay, and at the same time discuss an intelligent in depth analysis of the system.
I've seen other reviews state that the book is in poor taste but that didn't bother me at all. I think most people who have or do work in the healthcare system have experienced similar things and thoughts.... hopefully. Fingers crossed I'm not just outing myself here ha ha ha.....
I think if I'd have read just the memoir side of things then it would have been 4 or 5 stars. And similarly, if I'd read just the academic bits it would probably have been rated higher. But unfortunately they just didn't blend well and it really affected the reading experience.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publishers for an a copy of this book for review.

[Susan Belperio · Rating 3 out of 5]

The title of this book is an absolute killer as is the cover photo. Perfection. Hats off to the author Pope Lonergan for his incisive and witty commentaries about a broken system of aged care, with the carers being the lowest form of life. We all know this to be true. Many of his anecdotes and experiences resonate deeply with anyone who's had to have a relative in an aged care particularly with dementia. I can't work out why I managed to nod off every night whilst reading this book. Whilst many parts of the book engaged me deeply, other parts put me to sleep. Hats off also to him for his dedication in working this broken system, and I'm sure than many of the residents were that much the better because of him. I look forward to seeing his live shows if ever he brings them to the Adelaide Fringe, which would possibly be a very good platform for them. Also, we need more committed aged carers here also!

[Kath · Rating 2 out of 5]

The author is obviously highly intelligent, proactive and caring, whilst not shying away from his own weaknesses. His resignation is certainly the care sector's loss. The book though tried to be half an academic treatise and half more earthy observations. It didn't quite work for me as a book and the humour was few and far between. I appreciate Covid came after he had left but it seems a little odd for a book about the care sector to be published in 2022 and not reference it at all.

[Natacake · Rating 4 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I’ll Die After Bingo is a very funny, honest, sad and intelligent book detailing Pope’s 10 years as a Care Home Assistant as well his struggle with drug addiction. Each chapter includes a funky little drawing too!