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Behind The Fourth Wall
New York playwright Noah Miller had it all—a supportive wife, a precocious daughter, a promising career. Then, suddenly, all is lost.
Still mourning his family, Noah reluctantly agrees to oversee the summer production of his play on Cape Cod. There he befriends a woman who sympathizes with his grief. But her true objectives run deeper—into his very soul—and Noah becomes an unwitting victim of her deception.
Immersed in his production, he begins an affair with one of his actors but the guilt from their relationship leads to tragic consequences. Then, on the anniversary of his wife’s passing, Noah discovers the harrowing mystery behind her unexpected death and the part he played in it.
Harboring this devastating secret, his show about to open without one of its lead actors, and a dubious figure harassing him, Behind The Fourth Wall is a story of hope and redemption, forgiveness and second chances, and ultimately, the courage to face one’s darkest fears.
Still mourning his family, Noah reluctantly agrees to oversee the summer production of his play on Cape Cod. There he befriends a woman who sympathizes with his grief. But her true objectives run deeper—into his very soul—and Noah becomes an unwitting victim of her deception.
Immersed in his production, he begins an affair with one of his actors but the guilt from their relationship leads to tragic consequences. Then, on the anniversary of his wife’s passing, Noah discovers the harrowing mystery behind her unexpected death and the part he played in it.
Harboring this devastating secret, his show about to open without one of its lead actors, and a dubious figure harassing him, Behind The Fourth Wall is a story of hope and redemption, forgiveness and second chances, and ultimately, the courage to face one’s darkest fears.
293 pages, Paperback
Published January 13, 2022
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45 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
January 16, 2022
Buoyancy in the Face of Grief
Maybe, it’s the humor, since the Behind the Fourth Wall possesses an abundance of it. Maybe, it’s the illusory nature of some of the visions and characters, which shoot the novel through with surrealism. Maybe, it’s the lively presentation of the theatrical production within the novel that works as running counterpoint to everyday challenges. Whatever the reasons, Michael Solomowitz offers up a novel that somehow maintains a joyous buoyancy despite the tragedies that his protagonist must confront.
Noah Miller heads to Cape Cod to oversee the production of his play while he gropes to find his way forward from the grief of losing his wife and child. More than with most novels, a reviewer must be careful to avoid spoilers for many dark secrets surface over the course of story. Indeed, this suffering is inescapable throughout Behind the Fourth Wall, an outlook Solomowitz often presents with taciturn eloquence: “The wind blew. The sun slipped. Sand shifted. Remorse lingered.”
Noah talks about what had been unspoken, reliving his traumatic experiences, working through his memories, and carrying the reader along with him for numerous first-person chapters, which not only shift perspective, but add an immediacy to the narrative. Solomowitz immerses the reader through difficult material without descending into melodrama.
The production of Noah’s play goes a long way in giving the novel multiple layers. The refinement of the play’s performance echoes the refinement of Noah’s self-perceptions. The two simultaneous processes reverberate off each other, providing further insight into the nature of Noah’s relationships, both fictional and actual. As Noah explains to his actors in a scene that adds to the gravity of the title, the fourth wall “keeps you within the reality you’ve established.” That Behind the Fourth Wall pullulates with magic realism guarantees that every effort for Noah to control his path forward will be subverted, sometimes deliciously, other times disturbingly.
As the novel draws near its closing, the revelations keep coming as Noah calculates the price of ignoring suffering. And yet, as I said at the opening of this review, the novel avoids being a downer. Yes, some of that comes from a likable love interest in Molly and in the inherit cleverness of the play (the gameshow scene is a hoot). But most prominently the relationship between Noah and Jerry Ziegler (his agent, manager, and old friend) is crucial to giving Behind the Fourth Wall its charm. The wonderful banter between these two friends regularly lifts the mood of the novel, and Jerry is a constant source of humorous energy.
Given his forays into surrealism and suffering, Solomowitz offers the reader quite the high-wire act … one from which the reader can’t turn away, surprised that the act is more entertaining than it has any right to be.
Maybe, it’s the humor, since the Behind the Fourth Wall possesses an abundance of it. Maybe, it’s the illusory nature of some of the visions and characters, which shoot the novel through with surrealism. Maybe, it’s the lively presentation of the theatrical production within the novel that works as running counterpoint to everyday challenges. Whatever the reasons, Michael Solomowitz offers up a novel that somehow maintains a joyous buoyancy despite the tragedies that his protagonist must confront.
Noah Miller heads to Cape Cod to oversee the production of his play while he gropes to find his way forward from the grief of losing his wife and child. More than with most novels, a reviewer must be careful to avoid spoilers for many dark secrets surface over the course of story. Indeed, this suffering is inescapable throughout Behind the Fourth Wall, an outlook Solomowitz often presents with taciturn eloquence: “The wind blew. The sun slipped. Sand shifted. Remorse lingered.”
Noah talks about what had been unspoken, reliving his traumatic experiences, working through his memories, and carrying the reader along with him for numerous first-person chapters, which not only shift perspective, but add an immediacy to the narrative. Solomowitz immerses the reader through difficult material without descending into melodrama.
The production of Noah’s play goes a long way in giving the novel multiple layers. The refinement of the play’s performance echoes the refinement of Noah’s self-perceptions. The two simultaneous processes reverberate off each other, providing further insight into the nature of Noah’s relationships, both fictional and actual. As Noah explains to his actors in a scene that adds to the gravity of the title, the fourth wall “keeps you within the reality you’ve established.” That Behind the Fourth Wall pullulates with magic realism guarantees that every effort for Noah to control his path forward will be subverted, sometimes deliciously, other times disturbingly.
As the novel draws near its closing, the revelations keep coming as Noah calculates the price of ignoring suffering. And yet, as I said at the opening of this review, the novel avoids being a downer. Yes, some of that comes from a likable love interest in Molly and in the inherit cleverness of the play (the gameshow scene is a hoot). But most prominently the relationship between Noah and Jerry Ziegler (his agent, manager, and old friend) is crucial to giving Behind the Fourth Wall its charm. The wonderful banter between these two friends regularly lifts the mood of the novel, and Jerry is a constant source of humorous energy.
Given his forays into surrealism and suffering, Solomowitz offers the reader quite the high-wire act … one from which the reader can’t turn away, surprised that the act is more entertaining than it has any right to be.
February 27, 2022
BEHIND THE FOURTH WALL by Michael Solomowitz
Published by: Black Rose Writing
Publication date: January 13, 2022
Pages: 293
Genres: Literary Fiction (classified by publisher); (and from me:) flashes of Speculative Historical Fiction, a dose of graphic Erotica, and a large dose of Magical Realism
POV:
third person, single POV, past tense (for about half the chapters) shifting to omniscient for about half the chapters
first person, past tense (roughly one chapter out of every four to six chapters)
occasional second person narration
Narrator: authorial, with sparks of omniscience across heads or space and time
Opening setting: An urban city restaurant, Butera's; not present day
Other significant locations: New York City; Cape Cod, Cape Playhouse in Dennis, Massachusetts
Number of named, identified or described characters: 83
Publisher's Summary:
New York playwright Noah Miller had it all–a supportive wife, a precocious daughter, a promising career. Then, suddenly, all is lost.
Still mourning his family, Noah reluctantly agrees to oversee the summer production of his play on Cape Cod. There he befriends a woman who sympathizes with his grief. But her true objectives run deeper–into his very soul–and Noah becomes an unwitting victim of her deception.
Immersed in his production, he begins an affair with one of his actors but the guilt from their relationship leads to tragic consequences. Then, on the anniversary of his wife's passing, Noah discovers the harrowing mystery behind her unexpected death and the part he played in it.
Harboring this devastating secret, his show about to open without one of its lead actors, and a dubious figure harassing him, Behind the Fourth Wall is a story of hope and redemption, forgiveness and second chances, and ultimately, the courage to face one's darkest fears.
My Review:
If you like these genres, consider reading this book that opens with a prologue in which Noah, overcoming a series of challenges, proposes marriage to Jessie, Jess, Jessica and receives a seemingly odd acceptance. Chapter one shows Noah, riding a ferry, having departed Connecticut, sans his job at the firm, his rental house, and his family, now relocating. In a Seinfeld-esque flashback, Noah learns his dusted off play, Committed, is potentially running on the Cape.
I was immediately drawn to the voice and spirit of downtrodden Noah and his longtime friend, Jerry, who both seemed about 65 years old to me. Who doesn't love an underdog or a struggling writer? Noah is troubled.
But I couldn't determine the time setting: my guesses: the prologue was 15 - 30 years earlier, chapter one opener was about 15 years ago, and the flashback in chapter one was at least a decade earlier. Noah's age was a mystery in the early scenes, with scant clues: drinking scotch, proposing marriage years back, leaving a firm, losing a family, meeting a college "crony," using the word tush, one mention of one number in a phone--otherwise zero cell phones in the first third of the book. At 5% (Kindle progress) of the way into the book, we learn Noah is currently 42 years old, and not long after we're able to piece together some significant events in the last few months that planted a seed of change in Noah. At about 7%, it seems like the year 2000 or 2001--still no signposts advertising the setting year. Suddenly at 19% there are electric bikes and an Uber. Current day? If we're in present day, such as 2021 or 2022, the music--maybe a dozen songs liked and sung along by Noah and Jerry, these two 42 year-olds, are from before they were born, as is their favorite movie actor, who died when they were two or three years old. There were many older details from bygone times: Communists, Scarlet O'Hara, TaB Diet Cola, a dozen songs of the 1960s and early 1970s, direct mail sweepstakes, Jimmy Stewart. I never figured this discontinuity out.
Part of the joy of the vague timelines came from the mystery created by that void. Without spoilers, the vacuum raises questions about two central characters, which are answered slowly and artfully with tiny breadcrumbs quite far apart. For me, this trail pulled me through the story even as it meandered from poignant to dark to abysmal. I've lost a few people very close to me, and I could relate to these characters harboring deep feelings, which was told through authentic raw language and emotions.
Touching details showed up often, such as at a funeral early in the book when a surprising event took focus off what was really going on--a great technique for a writer to make the scene not about what the scene was about.
Some scenes were hilarious, not the least of which was a neurotic dream sequence deep in Noah's troubled brain that works itself into his play.
One poignant scene stems from discussing early career failures, culminating in a thought almost lost in passing about how futures could be eclipsed by first job successes, often wanted so badly at the time, but how early job failures often lead to changes and future treasured moments. I would have enjoyed spending more time on that notion.
Early on, Noah has a wandering eye for the ladies and an unstoppable sexualized inner monologue that is hair triggered by an inordinately high number of model-like women orbiting around him, each of whom don short skirts or tight clothes. But his friend Jerry is ten times worse. The sexualization of women was omnipresent, including Noah's belief that a young college aged-man was derelict in his duties because he was distracted ogling the prancing older sisters of four-year-olds or their young mothers--the age calculations jarred me away from the book for awhile.
Witnessing the production of the play, building it up from scratch, was fun and interesting and a great parallel to the structure of an unfolding novel. I enjoyed learning many things about the art of rehearsing and putting on a play, including the fear and anxiety of all the ways it could fail. Love the title, which tied into play-craft.
Following a childish fight between the playwright and the director regarding a potential rewrite (which explodes in front of the whole crew and is gossiped to outsiders), they return to rehearsals a couple days later to practice the very scene of artistic disagreement, but although they run through the entire scene, there is absolutely no mention of this argument or disagreement, which could have been brutal--luckily, it festers and does come up again. Another missed opportunity was when the producer made a massive decision and change for the play--only we never see the point at which he makes the decision--it's all sort of implied between the lines, nor do we see the crew being informed of the decision or the ensuing afternoon rehearsal, any of which could have made for high tension and stakes.
When I finally saw what I knew was coming for half the book--a tragedy from Noah's past--I was disconnected from the event because, to me, it felt like a description of a flashback, much of which didn't seem in scene for Noah. I thought he was describing the memory to himself in his mind. I couldn't connect until I got to Noah's reflections on what he had lost, which seemed deep, painful, and authentic. Later, when Noah forces himself to confront his role in the tragedy, the prose drew me in and held me in Noah's sorrow and self-torture.
There's a moment three fourths of the way through the book when I lost interest in Noah due to his habit of making everything about him. When one of his loved ones went through a deep loss, not only did he not have empathy for them, his reaction was to contrive something that two other people did into a plot against himself.
I didn't buy a plot twist of an argument between two of the characters late in the book--felt stilted and forced, and it distracted me, and then I figured the only reason for the argument was to force a setup for the next event that occurred. Then Noah managed to turn both situations into something about him, even though someone else got hauled away in the ambulance. On the other hand, I'm sort of disappointed in myself for not expecting egotistic behavior, even narcissism, from Noah who wrote a play about himself, especially when he dehumanized the other two real people in the play--both his real life girlfriends--by combining them into one character. His focus on himself increased in every chapter, even turning another person's darkest day into a situation where that person should have been concerned about how they would impact Noah. One more chapter, and another person is nearly killed, which again Noah turned into something about him. One chapter later, human-Noah showed up with empathy, and I liked him again.
The POV changes didn't work for me. After a few of the switches from third person to first person, I figured out those were all flashbacks into Noah's head to lay out his backstory, but those were difficult to identify since there were no time signposts. There were many other flashbacks that were in third person, so the first person switches just pulled me out of the story. I didn't understand the oscillation between third person and third person, omniscient.
There is a great mirror symmetry between where the story starts and where it ends, and I loved that. There are also many great artifacts in this tale, some recur and span much of the book while some show up for only a short period, and they all added a texture to the narrative that felt good.
This book set up a great spiritual and philosophical question that I will leave hidden so you can discover it. The question is perhaps one of the most important questions humans can contemplate, and I enjoyed considering it as part of this read.
The book holds mysteries, including one of the character's hidden identity, which most readers should unlock about 11% of the way into the book, although it was flourished as a big reveal about three quarters of the way through.
(Spoiler Alert) For me, the Native American subplot didn't work, particularly because there is a huge passing of the baton to Noah that he doesn't seem to recognize or contemplate the massive duties bestowed upon him. Someone suggests he has been chosen for a huge role in the tribe, and he asks, "For what?" Great question. While the tribe is mentioned one more time, he makes nothing of his caretaker / leader role which felt to me like a last ditch effort to save these peoples by anointing him as their savior. The horrors bestowed on this particular tribe on Cape Cod is worthy of its own book where it could be dealt with fully.
(Spoiler Alert) There's a ton of speculative fiction or magical realism in this book, including time traveling historic crowds; magic insects; a turban-clad, time-warping fortuneteller; time traveling by present day characters; and a shape-shifting ghost or perhaps an angel who can erase thoughts.
But you should read about this playwright and decide what you think.
I received an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions in this review are my own.
Published by: Black Rose Writing
Publication date: January 13, 2022
Pages: 293
Genres: Literary Fiction (classified by publisher); (and from me:) flashes of Speculative Historical Fiction, a dose of graphic Erotica, and a large dose of Magical Realism
POV:
third person, single POV, past tense (for about half the chapters) shifting to omniscient for about half the chapters
first person, past tense (roughly one chapter out of every four to six chapters)
occasional second person narration
Narrator: authorial, with sparks of omniscience across heads or space and time
Opening setting: An urban city restaurant, Butera's; not present day
Other significant locations: New York City; Cape Cod, Cape Playhouse in Dennis, Massachusetts
Number of named, identified or described characters: 83
Publisher's Summary:
New York playwright Noah Miller had it all–a supportive wife, a precocious daughter, a promising career. Then, suddenly, all is lost.
Still mourning his family, Noah reluctantly agrees to oversee the summer production of his play on Cape Cod. There he befriends a woman who sympathizes with his grief. But her true objectives run deeper–into his very soul–and Noah becomes an unwitting victim of her deception.
Immersed in his production, he begins an affair with one of his actors but the guilt from their relationship leads to tragic consequences. Then, on the anniversary of his wife's passing, Noah discovers the harrowing mystery behind her unexpected death and the part he played in it.
Harboring this devastating secret, his show about to open without one of its lead actors, and a dubious figure harassing him, Behind the Fourth Wall is a story of hope and redemption, forgiveness and second chances, and ultimately, the courage to face one's darkest fears.
My Review:
If you like these genres, consider reading this book that opens with a prologue in which Noah, overcoming a series of challenges, proposes marriage to Jessie, Jess, Jessica and receives a seemingly odd acceptance. Chapter one shows Noah, riding a ferry, having departed Connecticut, sans his job at the firm, his rental house, and his family, now relocating. In a Seinfeld-esque flashback, Noah learns his dusted off play, Committed, is potentially running on the Cape.
I was immediately drawn to the voice and spirit of downtrodden Noah and his longtime friend, Jerry, who both seemed about 65 years old to me. Who doesn't love an underdog or a struggling writer? Noah is troubled.
But I couldn't determine the time setting: my guesses: the prologue was 15 - 30 years earlier, chapter one opener was about 15 years ago, and the flashback in chapter one was at least a decade earlier. Noah's age was a mystery in the early scenes, with scant clues: drinking scotch, proposing marriage years back, leaving a firm, losing a family, meeting a college "crony," using the word tush, one mention of one number in a phone--otherwise zero cell phones in the first third of the book. At 5% (Kindle progress) of the way into the book, we learn Noah is currently 42 years old, and not long after we're able to piece together some significant events in the last few months that planted a seed of change in Noah. At about 7%, it seems like the year 2000 or 2001--still no signposts advertising the setting year. Suddenly at 19% there are electric bikes and an Uber. Current day? If we're in present day, such as 2021 or 2022, the music--maybe a dozen songs liked and sung along by Noah and Jerry, these two 42 year-olds, are from before they were born, as is their favorite movie actor, who died when they were two or three years old. There were many older details from bygone times: Communists, Scarlet O'Hara, TaB Diet Cola, a dozen songs of the 1960s and early 1970s, direct mail sweepstakes, Jimmy Stewart. I never figured this discontinuity out.
Part of the joy of the vague timelines came from the mystery created by that void. Without spoilers, the vacuum raises questions about two central characters, which are answered slowly and artfully with tiny breadcrumbs quite far apart. For me, this trail pulled me through the story even as it meandered from poignant to dark to abysmal. I've lost a few people very close to me, and I could relate to these characters harboring deep feelings, which was told through authentic raw language and emotions.
Touching details showed up often, such as at a funeral early in the book when a surprising event took focus off what was really going on--a great technique for a writer to make the scene not about what the scene was about.
Some scenes were hilarious, not the least of which was a neurotic dream sequence deep in Noah's troubled brain that works itself into his play.
One poignant scene stems from discussing early career failures, culminating in a thought almost lost in passing about how futures could be eclipsed by first job successes, often wanted so badly at the time, but how early job failures often lead to changes and future treasured moments. I would have enjoyed spending more time on that notion.
Early on, Noah has a wandering eye for the ladies and an unstoppable sexualized inner monologue that is hair triggered by an inordinately high number of model-like women orbiting around him, each of whom don short skirts or tight clothes. But his friend Jerry is ten times worse. The sexualization of women was omnipresent, including Noah's belief that a young college aged-man was derelict in his duties because he was distracted ogling the prancing older sisters of four-year-olds or their young mothers--the age calculations jarred me away from the book for awhile.
Witnessing the production of the play, building it up from scratch, was fun and interesting and a great parallel to the structure of an unfolding novel. I enjoyed learning many things about the art of rehearsing and putting on a play, including the fear and anxiety of all the ways it could fail. Love the title, which tied into play-craft.
Following a childish fight between the playwright and the director regarding a potential rewrite (which explodes in front of the whole crew and is gossiped to outsiders), they return to rehearsals a couple days later to practice the very scene of artistic disagreement, but although they run through the entire scene, there is absolutely no mention of this argument or disagreement, which could have been brutal--luckily, it festers and does come up again. Another missed opportunity was when the producer made a massive decision and change for the play--only we never see the point at which he makes the decision--it's all sort of implied between the lines, nor do we see the crew being informed of the decision or the ensuing afternoon rehearsal, any of which could have made for high tension and stakes.
When I finally saw what I knew was coming for half the book--a tragedy from Noah's past--I was disconnected from the event because, to me, it felt like a description of a flashback, much of which didn't seem in scene for Noah. I thought he was describing the memory to himself in his mind. I couldn't connect until I got to Noah's reflections on what he had lost, which seemed deep, painful, and authentic. Later, when Noah forces himself to confront his role in the tragedy, the prose drew me in and held me in Noah's sorrow and self-torture.
There's a moment three fourths of the way through the book when I lost interest in Noah due to his habit of making everything about him. When one of his loved ones went through a deep loss, not only did he not have empathy for them, his reaction was to contrive something that two other people did into a plot against himself.
I didn't buy a plot twist of an argument between two of the characters late in the book--felt stilted and forced, and it distracted me, and then I figured the only reason for the argument was to force a setup for the next event that occurred. Then Noah managed to turn both situations into something about him, even though someone else got hauled away in the ambulance. On the other hand, I'm sort of disappointed in myself for not expecting egotistic behavior, even narcissism, from Noah who wrote a play about himself, especially when he dehumanized the other two real people in the play--both his real life girlfriends--by combining them into one character. His focus on himself increased in every chapter, even turning another person's darkest day into a situation where that person should have been concerned about how they would impact Noah. One more chapter, and another person is nearly killed, which again Noah turned into something about him. One chapter later, human-Noah showed up with empathy, and I liked him again.
The POV changes didn't work for me. After a few of the switches from third person to first person, I figured out those were all flashbacks into Noah's head to lay out his backstory, but those were difficult to identify since there were no time signposts. There were many other flashbacks that were in third person, so the first person switches just pulled me out of the story. I didn't understand the oscillation between third person and third person, omniscient.
There is a great mirror symmetry between where the story starts and where it ends, and I loved that. There are also many great artifacts in this tale, some recur and span much of the book while some show up for only a short period, and they all added a texture to the narrative that felt good.
This book set up a great spiritual and philosophical question that I will leave hidden so you can discover it. The question is perhaps one of the most important questions humans can contemplate, and I enjoyed considering it as part of this read.
The book holds mysteries, including one of the character's hidden identity, which most readers should unlock about 11% of the way into the book, although it was flourished as a big reveal about three quarters of the way through.
(Spoiler Alert) For me, the Native American subplot didn't work, particularly because there is a huge passing of the baton to Noah that he doesn't seem to recognize or contemplate the massive duties bestowed upon him. Someone suggests he has been chosen for a huge role in the tribe, and he asks, "For what?" Great question. While the tribe is mentioned one more time, he makes nothing of his caretaker / leader role which felt to me like a last ditch effort to save these peoples by anointing him as their savior. The horrors bestowed on this particular tribe on Cape Cod is worthy of its own book where it could be dealt with fully.
(Spoiler Alert) There's a ton of speculative fiction or magical realism in this book, including time traveling historic crowds; magic insects; a turban-clad, time-warping fortuneteller; time traveling by present day characters; and a shape-shifting ghost or perhaps an angel who can erase thoughts.
But you should read about this playwright and decide what you think.
I received an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions in this review are my own.
December 29, 2021
Overall Rating = 3.67
Storyline & Concept = 3.5
Writing and Delivery = 3.5
Editorial = 4
Behind the Fourth Wall takes the reader behind the scenes of a theatrical production in Cape Cod when Noah Miller, a playwright and theatre reviewer, has the opportunity to assist in the presentation of his own play. Plagued by the tragic events of his past and struggling with guilt, Noah finds answers, forgiveness, and a chance to move on with his life.
This novel was submitted as a mystery suspense, but I feel the pacing and plot places it in the literary genre. The author does a very good job developing his characters and giving the reader an important connection to the protagonist. It’s obvious from the beginning that Mr. Solomowitz has experience in the theatrical world. He paints a detailed picture of the domain, something that would appeal to theatre buffs. He uses a supporting cast of old and new friends and the occasional, interesting appearance of a young woman to plot Noah’s recovery from the pain of his past. This is a novel that will interest readers who love a story of self-discovery and second chances.
Sublime Line: “Behind the Fourth Wall is an entertaining story of healing, love, and forgiveness, wrapped up in the intriguing world of live theatre.”
Storyline & Concept = 3.5
Writing and Delivery = 3.5
Editorial = 4
Behind the Fourth Wall takes the reader behind the scenes of a theatrical production in Cape Cod when Noah Miller, a playwright and theatre reviewer, has the opportunity to assist in the presentation of his own play. Plagued by the tragic events of his past and struggling with guilt, Noah finds answers, forgiveness, and a chance to move on with his life.
This novel was submitted as a mystery suspense, but I feel the pacing and plot places it in the literary genre. The author does a very good job developing his characters and giving the reader an important connection to the protagonist. It’s obvious from the beginning that Mr. Solomowitz has experience in the theatrical world. He paints a detailed picture of the domain, something that would appeal to theatre buffs. He uses a supporting cast of old and new friends and the occasional, interesting appearance of a young woman to plot Noah’s recovery from the pain of his past. This is a novel that will interest readers who love a story of self-discovery and second chances.
Sublime Line: “Behind the Fourth Wall is an entertaining story of healing, love, and forgiveness, wrapped up in the intriguing world of live theatre.”
September 15, 2021
A story of healing after immense trauma. When struggling theater reviewer Noah gets an opportunity to see one of his own plays performed on Cape Cod, he doesn't realize how much his life needed this change. Through relationships with the actors, new and old friends, and surprising appearances, he faces the guilt and pain of losing his family. Readers who enjoy theater and a touch of the surreal will love Behind the Fourth Wall.
May 2, 2022
A pleasant surprise.
This book is about an ordinary man - if being a playwright is ordinary - who is trying to rebuild his life after terrible family tragedies. Noah Miller is going through the emotional rollercoaster of grief, guilt, and finding a new love while taking part in producing his stage play.
The stage play is a story within a story.
This reader found all details - nuts and bolts of the step-by-step play production - very educational.
This book is about an ordinary man - if being a playwright is ordinary - who is trying to rebuild his life after terrible family tragedies. Noah Miller is going through the emotional rollercoaster of grief, guilt, and finding a new love while taking part in producing his stage play.
The stage play is a story within a story.
This reader found all details - nuts and bolts of the step-by-step play production - very educational.
May 5, 2022
If you're looking to get absorbed in a well-written story about facing your fears, overcoming grief, an inappropriate relationship, going behind the curtain at a Cape Cod theater, and so much more, BEHIND THE FOURTH WALL, is the book for you. I absolutely loved it!
May 13, 2022
Wow!!
I haven't read such an emotionally charged book since The Shack. Solomowitz captures the pain of love, loss, grief, and recovery in a way that will leave the reader spellbound. Highly recommended!!
I haven't read such an emotionally charged book since The Shack. Solomowitz captures the pain of love, loss, grief, and recovery in a way that will leave the reader spellbound. Highly recommended!!
January 20, 2022
This is a beautifully written book that is deep and reflective and touching in all the right ways. It surprised me that I wanted to keep turning the pages. What could have been a slow walk of a book was instead perfectly paced and thoroughly gripping at times. The characters are painted three-dimensional, which strengthens the story.
Noah is a man brought low by the recent losses of his daughter and wife. Apathy is his driving force, guilt is his cross to bear. But when he accepts an offer to oversee a revival of his play on Cape Cod, his life takes unexpected turns that shock and challenge him, even as they strengthen him.
I really liked Noah—his sense of humor, his sincere caring for others, his intelligence. The professionalism and talent he brings to his work helps us know he’s solid, if a bit broken. This makes him a sympathetic figure, but we’re aware of his admirable reserves. All of these traits, along with a host of characters who add drama and humor to the story, propel him through a heart-rending, haunting journey on his way to the redemption he never thought he would obtain, and with such grace.
Noah is a man brought low by the recent losses of his daughter and wife. Apathy is his driving force, guilt is his cross to bear. But when he accepts an offer to oversee a revival of his play on Cape Cod, his life takes unexpected turns that shock and challenge him, even as they strengthen him.
I really liked Noah—his sense of humor, his sincere caring for others, his intelligence. The professionalism and talent he brings to his work helps us know he’s solid, if a bit broken. This makes him a sympathetic figure, but we’re aware of his admirable reserves. All of these traits, along with a host of characters who add drama and humor to the story, propel him through a heart-rending, haunting journey on his way to the redemption he never thought he would obtain, and with such grace.
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March 31, 2022Summertime is synonymous with books known as the “beach read” – novels that are perfect for vacation. For me, the beach read provides an escape from reality and helps achieve those summer vibes. Michael Solomowitz’s debut novel captures the essence of summer and distills the experience of a playwright's working vacation on Cape Cod into the pages of a book.
It is hard to put this novel in a category. It has drama both human and theatrical, mystery, a bit of the other worldly, and romance. The novel takes place at a beachfront village on Cape Cod Bay and we enjoy the famous locales with the characters—perfect summer vibes!
I can’t say that his novel is pure fun (sorrow propels the main character Noah to take on the summer theater production at the historic Cape Playhouse in Dennis) but despite the heavy back story, Solomowitz’s prose is warm and inviting. It reveals how the impact of a tragic event has ricocheted across Noah’s family of friends and colored all their lives. His approach creates a protagonist and a supporting cast of characters that have depth and complexity, none are reduced to a singular moment of trauma.
Its “the show must go on'' plot, likable characters, and matter-of-fact inclusion of fantastic elements that combine to hook the reader. The summer setting is Cape Cod (past and present) with forays to Martha’s Vineyard and the Indian lands of the Wampanoag tribe. Even if readers can’t get to the Cape themselves, reading a book set during long summer days can serve as a substitute. For those lucky enough to vacation on the Cape, Behind the Fourth Wall will keep you turning pages and would go perfectly with a trip to the beach.
It is hard to put this novel in a category. It has drama both human and theatrical, mystery, a bit of the other worldly, and romance. The novel takes place at a beachfront village on Cape Cod Bay and we enjoy the famous locales with the characters—perfect summer vibes!
I can’t say that his novel is pure fun (sorrow propels the main character Noah to take on the summer theater production at the historic Cape Playhouse in Dennis) but despite the heavy back story, Solomowitz’s prose is warm and inviting. It reveals how the impact of a tragic event has ricocheted across Noah’s family of friends and colored all their lives. His approach creates a protagonist and a supporting cast of characters that have depth and complexity, none are reduced to a singular moment of trauma.
Its “the show must go on'' plot, likable characters, and matter-of-fact inclusion of fantastic elements that combine to hook the reader. The summer setting is Cape Cod (past and present) with forays to Martha’s Vineyard and the Indian lands of the Wampanoag tribe. Even if readers can’t get to the Cape themselves, reading a book set during long summer days can serve as a substitute. For those lucky enough to vacation on the Cape, Behind the Fourth Wall will keep you turning pages and would go perfectly with a trip to the beach.
November 19, 2021
A cleverly written tale that delivers a riveting plot wrapped in a tightly-paced narrative. Behind the Fourth Wall is filled with everything that makes you stay up reading deep into the night: Mystery, things that go bump in the night, relationships, and wonderfully flawed characters who stay with you long after the last page is finished.
January 22, 2022
Behind the Fourth Wall is an insightful journey of playwright Noah Miller’s chance to find healing and redemption throughout his challenge of producing a play on Cape Cod after his two personal tragedies. Interesting twists and turns in every chapter.
January 19, 2022
This is an exceptional novel and am recommending it to everyone!
November 29, 2022
There were so many emotions to deal with in this book. It was sad, funny, dramatic, loving. It was a very good book. I really enjoyed it.
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November 30, 2021"The Fourth Wall of the title refers to the theatre, and to the wall between us and people who have gone from us. If you like to learn about the magic of theatre, and read magical realism/fabulism, this is the book for you!"
January 15, 2022
This intriguing novel, set in beautiful Cape Cod, was a pleasure to read. As the story unfolds, there are twists and turns that are captivating and surprising. It hits on so many levels of emotions: love, loss, grief, courage, hope. Looking forward to more from this author.
February 13, 2022
I loved this book! My heart broke for Noah but I spent the entire book rooting for him, hoping he’d find peace. I enjoyed the behind the scenes look into directing a play and the backdrop of Cape Cod was the perfect setting! The characters were very real and relatable. Perfect debut novel, looking forward to reading the next one!
February 27, 2022
Noah Miller takes time off from his job as a theatre reviewer in New York to oversee a production of his one and only play in a small venue in Cape Cod.
Still not recovered from the death of his wife Noah seeks to use the play as a distraction from the reality of his life without her.
A fallout with the play’s director, an affair with the leading lady and a woman who seems to know a little too much about Noah give the book plenty to play with as we are taken on a ride with Noah until his family secrets are laid bare.
Very well written with a mix of character driven story and interesting behind the scenes detail of putting on a play. Add in some nice scene setting in the beautiful area around the cape and you’ve got a riveting story that keeps the pages turning
Still not recovered from the death of his wife Noah seeks to use the play as a distraction from the reality of his life without her.
A fallout with the play’s director, an affair with the leading lady and a woman who seems to know a little too much about Noah give the book plenty to play with as we are taken on a ride with Noah until his family secrets are laid bare.
Very well written with a mix of character driven story and interesting behind the scenes detail of putting on a play. Add in some nice scene setting in the beautiful area around the cape and you’ve got a riveting story that keeps the pages turning
March 20, 2022
Behind the Fourth Wall is not only the name of Michael Solomowitz’s debut novel, it’s also a phrase that portrays the space which separates a performer or performance from its audience.
While that definition works well for the setting of this story, it also foreshadows the perceived space between real and unreal, those present and those gone. Its complexity forms a perfect symbolism for Noah Miller’s unimaginable loss and chaotic struggle to find himself through a multi-faceted set of people, events, realities, and unrealities.
I found this to be a challenging read. Getting inside Noah’s head and heart to understand his choices, decisions, and motivations kept me fully engaged in the story. The author did a wonderful job of keeping the plot progressive without making the journey too easy on his readers. Sometimes I felt a step ahead of Noah and at other times I felt more lost than Noah himself.
Be prepared to ride an emotional bullet train through disbelief, grief, anger, shock, and so much more while immersing yourself in the world of live theater. There is so much going on in this book. It amazes me how the author kept all the layers and threads together. His characters are diverse and some of them are all too real, making them impossible to forget.
Plan to spend some time analyzing the surreal events and perceptions Noah experiences. I guarantee they will keep you guessing.
I believe readers who enjoy the unusual and imaginative will find this story an intriguing and satisfying experience. And if you’re anything like me, it will leave you with a lot to think about.
While that definition works well for the setting of this story, it also foreshadows the perceived space between real and unreal, those present and those gone. Its complexity forms a perfect symbolism for Noah Miller’s unimaginable loss and chaotic struggle to find himself through a multi-faceted set of people, events, realities, and unrealities.
I found this to be a challenging read. Getting inside Noah’s head and heart to understand his choices, decisions, and motivations kept me fully engaged in the story. The author did a wonderful job of keeping the plot progressive without making the journey too easy on his readers. Sometimes I felt a step ahead of Noah and at other times I felt more lost than Noah himself.
Be prepared to ride an emotional bullet train through disbelief, grief, anger, shock, and so much more while immersing yourself in the world of live theater. There is so much going on in this book. It amazes me how the author kept all the layers and threads together. His characters are diverse and some of them are all too real, making them impossible to forget.
Plan to spend some time analyzing the surreal events and perceptions Noah experiences. I guarantee they will keep you guessing.
I believe readers who enjoy the unusual and imaginative will find this story an intriguing and satisfying experience. And if you’re anything like me, it will leave you with a lot to think about.
September 4, 2022
An insider's look into the world of theatre, actors, playwrights and the intricacies of staging a play. I enjoyed learning more about this segment of the performing arts. The main character, Noah Miller, is a complex, flawed character who overcomes tragedy and darkness, to move forward with his life and relationships. Well-developed characters and story arc for a very satisfying story. As a resident of Cape Cod, I also enjoyed references to some of my favorite spots, too. A fast-paced read.
January 31, 2022
What a novel!! 5 stars easily.
A deep and powerful story that delves into the life of a man living with the trauma of a worst imaginable nightmare, and not only coping with it, but pushing through to follow their dreams. At the same time, Michael Solomowitz pulls the curtain back to show the reader/audience what goes into directing a play. He evokes such vivid imagery throughout the novel, set in scenic Cape Cod. A masterful work that plucks the heartstrings and gives hope to those living in despair. You really can relate with the protagonist, Noah, as he dances between the feelings of lighthearted joy, sorrow, reflectiveness, pain, and triumph. This novel is a must-read, and I cannot wait until it is produced into a movie. Eager to see what other novels Michael Solomowitz comes out with!
A deep and powerful story that delves into the life of a man living with the trauma of a worst imaginable nightmare, and not only coping with it, but pushing through to follow their dreams. At the same time, Michael Solomowitz pulls the curtain back to show the reader/audience what goes into directing a play. He evokes such vivid imagery throughout the novel, set in scenic Cape Cod. A masterful work that plucks the heartstrings and gives hope to those living in despair. You really can relate with the protagonist, Noah, as he dances between the feelings of lighthearted joy, sorrow, reflectiveness, pain, and triumph. This novel is a must-read, and I cannot wait until it is produced into a movie. Eager to see what other novels Michael Solomowitz comes out with!
January 3, 2022
Powerful and poignant, with mystical elements, set in a summer stock background, Behind The Fourth Wall rides the waves with a sure foot on the board. Intrigue and romance play their part as Noah learns to trust once more. A five star read that tears at your heartstrings.
July 27, 2022
“Behind the Fourth Wall” introduces readers to playwright Noah Miller, who is grieving the loss of his daughter and then wife. He has been working as a theater reviewer in New York City while struggling to write his own plays. His friend Jerry invites him out to Cape Cod to oversee the production of his one play. Noah reluctantly goes and tries to focus his mind on the play instead of his overwhelming grief. While at a party, Noah meets Emma, a woman stating that she’s in real estate, but no one knows her or even notices her at the party.
“Behind the Fourth Wall” shows the intimate nature of one’s grief and how one tries to overcome it. The story is told in flashbacks and present day. The flashbacks didn’t seem to have a frame of reference to the present day action, and could have been intertwined better. The flashbacks are very important to Noah’s character and the ultimate ending. Noah’s characterization seems to be of a normal man who, like everyone, has his own individual life story. Solomowitz did a solid job in creating Noah’s strong character without making him obnoxious.
It is obvious that Solomowitz has a background in playwriting and directing. The details of how Noah’s play comes together is told in a way that gives readers the idea of what is going on without it being too technical, which I imagine was hard for Solomowitz to do in certain scenes. That said, the play is background, and some parts were not needed since I feel that Noah’s grief is the focus of the story.
The intertwining of Noah’s character with Emma and the rest of the characters feels genuine, which gives credit to Solomowitz and his writing. The ultimate truth of why Noah’s wife passed away leads to healing and the ability for Noah to move on with his life in a positive way instead of staying down in his levels of grief.
Overall, “Behind the Fourth Wall” is a decent read about grief and how it changes people
“Behind the Fourth Wall” shows the intimate nature of one’s grief and how one tries to overcome it. The story is told in flashbacks and present day. The flashbacks didn’t seem to have a frame of reference to the present day action, and could have been intertwined better. The flashbacks are very important to Noah’s character and the ultimate ending. Noah’s characterization seems to be of a normal man who, like everyone, has his own individual life story. Solomowitz did a solid job in creating Noah’s strong character without making him obnoxious.
It is obvious that Solomowitz has a background in playwriting and directing. The details of how Noah’s play comes together is told in a way that gives readers the idea of what is going on without it being too technical, which I imagine was hard for Solomowitz to do in certain scenes. That said, the play is background, and some parts were not needed since I feel that Noah’s grief is the focus of the story.
The intertwining of Noah’s character with Emma and the rest of the characters feels genuine, which gives credit to Solomowitz and his writing. The ultimate truth of why Noah’s wife passed away leads to healing and the ability for Noah to move on with his life in a positive way instead of staying down in his levels of grief.
Overall, “Behind the Fourth Wall” is a decent read about grief and how it changes people
January 31, 2022
Bravo, Michael Solomowitz. Bravo!
I love live theater! Watching live actors, directors and stage crews present plays is a bunch of fun. I’ve often wondered what goes on behind the scenes. Now, I know.
In BEHIND THE FOURTH WALL, author Michael Solomowitz, who also writes theatrical plays, follows playwright Noah Miller, struggling from two deeply tragic losses as he accepts an invitation to assist the summer production of one of his plays on Cape Cod. Things don’t go smoothly for Miller, as he struggles with an over-bearing and obnoxious director and one of the lead actors is injured in an accident. But with the help of his theatrical crew, driven by a sense of purpose and aided by a mysterious presence, he begins to heal.
BONUS! BEHIND THE FOURTH WALL is not only a well-written suspenseful tale of a man seeking healing, purpose and redemption. It’s a wonderful, eye-opening, behind-the-scenes look at what goes on “behind the scenes” in a theater. The phrase, “The Fourth Wall” is defined as the space which separates a performer or performance from an audience”. Solomowitz’s book gives the reader a a front row seat to what take place behind that space.
Solomowitz’s smooth writing style makes this spooky mystery surrounding a theater production in the magical destination of Cape Cod a Blockbuster hit!
I love live theater! Watching live actors, directors and stage crews present plays is a bunch of fun. I’ve often wondered what goes on behind the scenes. Now, I know.
In BEHIND THE FOURTH WALL, author Michael Solomowitz, who also writes theatrical plays, follows playwright Noah Miller, struggling from two deeply tragic losses as he accepts an invitation to assist the summer production of one of his plays on Cape Cod. Things don’t go smoothly for Miller, as he struggles with an over-bearing and obnoxious director and one of the lead actors is injured in an accident. But with the help of his theatrical crew, driven by a sense of purpose and aided by a mysterious presence, he begins to heal.
BONUS! BEHIND THE FOURTH WALL is not only a well-written suspenseful tale of a man seeking healing, purpose and redemption. It’s a wonderful, eye-opening, behind-the-scenes look at what goes on “behind the scenes” in a theater. The phrase, “The Fourth Wall” is defined as the space which separates a performer or performance from an audience”. Solomowitz’s book gives the reader a a front row seat to what take place behind that space.
Solomowitz’s smooth writing style makes this spooky mystery surrounding a theater production in the magical destination of Cape Cod a Blockbuster hit!
December 24, 2022
Emotional journey
An upsurge of passion as move ahead in the book.A very well crafted story with excellent mix of theatre on stage and real life drama.A story of anguish, remorse and redemption.
An upsurge of passion as move ahead in the book.A very well crafted story with excellent mix of theatre on stage and real life drama.A story of anguish, remorse and redemption.
February 7, 2022
I was absorbed from the opening pages! Solomowitz has created characters whose depths are stirred and revealed through fresh and intriguing literary techniques: interpolations of ambiguous magic realism (is it Noah's imagination catapulted into an alternate reality by his intensely psychological predicament, or are we to believe it is really happening?); well-placed first-person narratives that flesh out details of the events that put Noah in that predicament; and crackling dialogue, which Solomowitz (a playwright, like his protagonist) uses in a penetrating and engaging way. The reader is privileged to a complexity that reflects the kind of reality we are familiar with but, by virtue of being human, have difficulty capturing and clarifying. All of this is developed in a compact storyline intensified by the imperative of producing a theatrical production in a short time frame. The plot is fueled by a constellation of interior and exterior pressures on Noah: grief and loneliness; stirring of desire; ambition; a power conflict during production; and the sincere, though sometimes frustrated, intervention of good friends. For the reader versed in the protocol of theatrical production, the narrative is infused, but not over-saturated, with rich, pleasing detail; for those without that experience, the read is an accessible and revealing tour behind the scenes. For all readers, Solomowitz's deft sprinkling of detail makes the experience tangible and relatable. Rather than breaking down the "fourth wall" in a crash at the end, reality chips away at the wall and settles in in a satisfactory way—not as a neat package, but as an affirming offering of possibilities.
May 31, 2023
Behind the fourth wall
I tried to write my review about4 times and each time the page just wouldn't load past two sentences.
Just as well. I liked nothing about the stkry, and the main premise is one of those maybe its maybe not concepts that tries to be mysterious and poignantly laced with sorrow but I thought it was trite, underwritten and too coy for my reading appetite.
I was BOXED with the uncertain background of writing and producing a far Oxford Broadway play in "The Hamptons", A geographic misnomer of a place where most people don't appear to live, just vacation and behold entitled snobs.
I wonder if the author knows people actually do live there but I suspect he remains unconvinced of the fact.
His prose is half formed and trite. I didn't care about any of the primary or secondary characters as none of them were fleshed out or the least bit engaging.
As for any sense of mysticism that was just ridiculously mundane, rather what you might expect to see in a 13 year old girl' Ouija board experience.
Boring and thin I tired of it all and paged far ahead only to find out it didn't actually move towards a conclusion, rather it just faded into the END and the notes.
I don't recommend this one unless you're too bored to try anything more complex and developed. I have enjoyed some shred of success as someone who crafts short stories so I hate to diss any author's work but this was simply impossible for me to finish.
I tried to write my review about4 times and each time the page just wouldn't load past two sentences.
Just as well. I liked nothing about the stkry, and the main premise is one of those maybe its maybe not concepts that tries to be mysterious and poignantly laced with sorrow but I thought it was trite, underwritten and too coy for my reading appetite.
I was BOXED with the uncertain background of writing and producing a far Oxford Broadway play in "The Hamptons", A geographic misnomer of a place where most people don't appear to live, just vacation and behold entitled snobs.
I wonder if the author knows people actually do live there but I suspect he remains unconvinced of the fact.
His prose is half formed and trite. I didn't care about any of the primary or secondary characters as none of them were fleshed out or the least bit engaging.
As for any sense of mysticism that was just ridiculously mundane, rather what you might expect to see in a 13 year old girl' Ouija board experience.
Boring and thin I tired of it all and paged far ahead only to find out it didn't actually move towards a conclusion, rather it just faded into the END and the notes.
I don't recommend this one unless you're too bored to try anything more complex and developed. I have enjoyed some shred of success as someone who crafts short stories so I hate to diss any author's work but this was simply impossible for me to finish.
September 23, 2025
I spent most of the time debating whether I'd move this to a DNF and probably should have. I appreciate the sentiment but that was about it. It seemed more like a series of statements than a coherent and emotional storyline. It was also confusing to switch between first and third person narrative with the different time periods.
December 1, 2021
A compelling read, Behind The Fourth Wall, is one man’s emotional journey from the depths of despair. Only after he believes the unbelievable can he find forgiveness, healing and a second chance at life.
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November 29, 2022A Debut Novel From the Heart
- Family & Relationships
- Facing Your Fears
- Overcoming Grief & Forgiveness
- Inappropriate Romance
- Cape Cod Setting
- Psychological Fiction
- Behind-the-Scenes Theater Production
Available in paperback and ebook on Release Date: January 13, 2022
What They're Saying:
“I loved it … a well-written and engaging novel … of love lost and forgiveness found, set against the backdrop of beautiful Cape Cod … with characters … with juicy flaws, spunky dialogue, and strong inner compasses.”
-– Reedsy Discovery Book Review
Short Excerpt:
“I was afraid of blaming Jessie … so I shut her down. Didn’t say a word. Wouldn’t let her say anything. When she tried, I left the room. Walked out of the house. I couldn’t listen to any of it. It was driving me nuts. The pain. Regret. Anger. It was strangling me. Should have been there. Even the look in her eyes. I couldn’t. I knew she was hurting. Both of us hurting. I just didn’t have the guts to face her.”
Then Noah rotated his body to the shore and cringed, turning back to the open sea. From a distance he might have looked like a ballet dancer pirouetting in stages. He whirled again, unable to find asylum.
“She needed to talk. What if she needed me to tell her I didn’t blame her? What if she thought … I did?”
This was the first time he had discussed the fallout of his actions to anyone and the revelation on top of his confession pierced his heart like a silver bullet. He was lost. Too much to bear. And the weight of his anguish rendered him helpless.
Noah Miller sank like he had been taken out by a sniper. He landed on his knees then toppled to his side, his head sinking below the waterline, flooding his throat with a surge of suffocating death not unlike what his daughter must have experienced. Molly bent over and yanked his head out of the water by his collar, precluding his demise. She pounded his back with an open hand, helping him cough it up then waited beside him in the frigid water, his arm strewn over her neck.
“You okay?”
Whether out of shame or remorse or a new wave of guilt, he didn’t answer.
It took several minutes before she was able to move him. Molly used every ounce of muscle to support his weight as they made their way back to the deserted beach. He collapsed on the towel and she joined him, an empty look saddled across his face.
Above them, seagulls circled the water hunting for supper. Feeding time. Each took turns skimming the waves and coming up empty. One kamikaze gull, plunging full force—submerging its body into the ocean—soared from the sullied waters with dinner in its beak and flew off to savor its hoard.
The wind blew. The sun slipped. Sand shifted. Remorse lingered.
Available in paperback and ebook on Release Date: January 13, 2022
- Family & Relationships
- Facing Your Fears
- Overcoming Grief & Forgiveness
- Inappropriate Romance
- Cape Cod Setting
- Psychological Fiction
- Behind-the-Scenes Theater Production
Available in paperback and ebook on Release Date: January 13, 2022
What They're Saying:
“I loved it … a well-written and engaging novel … of love lost and forgiveness found, set against the backdrop of beautiful Cape Cod … with characters … with juicy flaws, spunky dialogue, and strong inner compasses.”
-– Reedsy Discovery Book Review
Short Excerpt:
“I was afraid of blaming Jessie … so I shut her down. Didn’t say a word. Wouldn’t let her say anything. When she tried, I left the room. Walked out of the house. I couldn’t listen to any of it. It was driving me nuts. The pain. Regret. Anger. It was strangling me. Should have been there. Even the look in her eyes. I couldn’t. I knew she was hurting. Both of us hurting. I just didn’t have the guts to face her.”
Then Noah rotated his body to the shore and cringed, turning back to the open sea. From a distance he might have looked like a ballet dancer pirouetting in stages. He whirled again, unable to find asylum.
“She needed to talk. What if she needed me to tell her I didn’t blame her? What if she thought … I did?”
This was the first time he had discussed the fallout of his actions to anyone and the revelation on top of his confession pierced his heart like a silver bullet. He was lost. Too much to bear. And the weight of his anguish rendered him helpless.
Noah Miller sank like he had been taken out by a sniper. He landed on his knees then toppled to his side, his head sinking below the waterline, flooding his throat with a surge of suffocating death not unlike what his daughter must have experienced. Molly bent over and yanked his head out of the water by his collar, precluding his demise. She pounded his back with an open hand, helping him cough it up then waited beside him in the frigid water, his arm strewn over her neck.
“You okay?”
Whether out of shame or remorse or a new wave of guilt, he didn’t answer.
It took several minutes before she was able to move him. Molly used every ounce of muscle to support his weight as they made their way back to the deserted beach. He collapsed on the towel and she joined him, an empty look saddled across his face.
Above them, seagulls circled the water hunting for supper. Feeding time. Each took turns skimming the waves and coming up empty. One kamikaze gull, plunging full force—submerging its body into the ocean—soared from the sullied waters with dinner in its beak and flew off to savor its hoard.
The wind blew. The sun slipped. Sand shifted. Remorse lingered.
Available in paperback and ebook on Release Date: January 13, 2022
Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews