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The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex: Because Good Guys Make the Best Lovers
If you ever wonder, Is this all there is to sex? or I wish I knew how to help my wife enjoy this more, you'll appreciate this straightforward, helpful, and faith-based advice on how to have a better sex life. Based on groundbreaking surveys of more than twenty-five thousand people, this highly practical, research-based book shows guys how to rock their wife's world. The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex from popular marriage blogger and speaker Sheila Wray Gregoire and her husband, Dr. Keith Gregoire, will help This can-we-start-tonight? book about making sex wonderful explores how emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy all work together. It will appeal The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex also features Couple Projects at the end of each chapter and very specific "Good Guy Dares" to help you woo your wife in and out of the bedroom as you find your way to a delightful, God-given passion.
256 pages, Paperback
Published March 15, 2022
127 people are currently reading
1368 people want to read
About the author
Sheila Wray Gregoire
28 books740 followersSheila Wray Gregoire is an award-winning author of 9 books, including the ground-breaking Great Sex Rescue, and founder of BareMarriage.com. She's passionate about changing the evangelical conversation about sex to something that is mutual, initimate, and pleasurable for both. She heads up a team of researchers who want to bring evidence-based, healthy advice to evangelicalism when it comes to relationships. Sheila lives in Belleville, Ontario, with her husband Keith. They are the parents of two adult daughters.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 110 reviews
February 9, 2022
As part of the launch team, I got to read an early edition of this book. From the point of view of a mom, looking for resources for her kids as they grow into adulthood, this is an excellent book. I would highly recommend this (and the companion book for women) for anyone who is engaged to be married as well as married people who didn't have resources like this when they got married.
February 15, 2022
Guys, if you’re wondering why your wife has a “meh” attitude towards sex, you need to read this book!
The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex starts by redefining sex as something that can be mutually shared by both partners in ways that go beyond physical activity. Rethink and reset your mentality and approach to sex. Be a hero for your wife as you learn about roadblocks to women’s sexuality, how to remove them, and how to give her pleasure too. Enjoy the journey of discovering each other all over again. Learn how to connect emotionally and spiritually for an amazing sex life born of mutual admiration and desire.
This book was based on experience, testimony, and data. The technical and medical aspects of the book were concise and informative. It has an excellent balance between advice and admonishment, education, and encouragement.
For too long, marriage books have addressed symptoms and offered band aid solutions, mostly encouraging people to have more sex with the idea that sex alone will solve everything. This book addresses the causes that hinder us from having great sex to bring about true healing and a mentality that supports a healthy (and vibrant!) sex life. Don’t settle for just sex for the sake of sex; learn how to make sex a meaningful and wonderful part of your life.
This book would be great for young adults approaching being sexually active as well as those that have been married for years and anyone between! It is for anyone that desires to have a healthy view of sex.
The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex starts by redefining sex as something that can be mutually shared by both partners in ways that go beyond physical activity. Rethink and reset your mentality and approach to sex. Be a hero for your wife as you learn about roadblocks to women’s sexuality, how to remove them, and how to give her pleasure too. Enjoy the journey of discovering each other all over again. Learn how to connect emotionally and spiritually for an amazing sex life born of mutual admiration and desire.
This book was based on experience, testimony, and data. The technical and medical aspects of the book were concise and informative. It has an excellent balance between advice and admonishment, education, and encouragement.
For too long, marriage books have addressed symptoms and offered band aid solutions, mostly encouraging people to have more sex with the idea that sex alone will solve everything. This book addresses the causes that hinder us from having great sex to bring about true healing and a mentality that supports a healthy (and vibrant!) sex life. Don’t settle for just sex for the sake of sex; learn how to make sex a meaningful and wonderful part of your life.
This book would be great for young adults approaching being sexually active as well as those that have been married for years and anyone between! It is for anyone that desires to have a healthy view of sex.
February 11, 2022
Steven Curtis Chapman has a song "How Do I Love Her." This book has the same spirit as that song. If you want to know (or want your brothers and sons to know) how to have great, God-glorifying sex that is mutual, pleasurable, and intimate, then you need this book.
Christian men desperately need to understand that God made women different sexually, and that's good. The church has done a poor job of communicating this, teaching either that sex just isn't for women or that women should enjoy sex like men do.
News flash: women and men have different reproductive systems that biologically work differently. But both are capable of orgasm. Both are deserving of love and pleasure. This book does a wonderful job of giving husbands tools and framework to understand their wives' sexual response cycle, their hang-ups, their needs, and their God-given dignity.
I'll be giving copies of this and the Good Girl's Guide to every engaged couple in my life from now on.
Christian men desperately need to understand that God made women different sexually, and that's good. The church has done a poor job of communicating this, teaching either that sex just isn't for women or that women should enjoy sex like men do.
News flash: women and men have different reproductive systems that biologically work differently. But both are capable of orgasm. Both are deserving of love and pleasure. This book does a wonderful job of giving husbands tools and framework to understand their wives' sexual response cycle, their hang-ups, their needs, and their God-given dignity.
I'll be giving copies of this and the Good Girl's Guide to every engaged couple in my life from now on.
February 23, 2022
Read the digital advance edition of this book. Very well written guide around Sex for guys, and provides a great background on how to ensure good and healthy patterns are developed from the outset. Would be very helpful and informative for all guys to read before marriage. Could have helped avoid a lot of sexual challenges. Provides well-rounded advice on how Sex is much more than a physical act (includes emotional and spiritual connection), and how it is important to have all these elements present for a fulfilling sexual life. Overall, highly recommend the book.
February 20, 2022
Read this with my husband and was surprised with how well it captured my thoughts and feelings (a woman). Many times I was like "this right here" responsive vs. Spontaneous, great analogies throughout that help put things in perspective.
February 15, 2022
I am a member of the launch team. I have been reading Sheila's work for years now. And this one is just as good as the others. Great source of information that guys (especially brought up in church) need to know. My husband actually said that guys should read this instead of getting info from non legit online sources or from each other. It helps to understand and to get over things you need to.
February 24, 2022
I think this book is so helpful and so important, filling a gap in Christian advice books that has been gaping for a long time.
They emphasize over and over that sex is meant to be mutual, intimate and pleasurable for BOTH.
This book is mostly aimed at young couples or newlyweds (this would be a perfect wedding present or shower gift) but there is plenty of great advice for couples who have been married for a while and may be struggling (definitely get The Great Sex Rescue too if that's the case).
The Gregories really hit the right note I think: this book is filled with grace and redemption and and the love of Christ. If a husband is to love his wife as Christ loves the church then this is a powerful place to start. If there are hurts that need healing then this is a safe place to start. If you just really want to know how to rock your wife's world, this is a great place to start.
This book was thorough but a quick read, it's a great resource for pastors and counselors to use with couples in pre marital and marriage counseling (The discussion questions in the appendix would work great in that setting.) It isn't really written to just hand to a teenager but it would be a great book for a parent to read before talking with their teens about sex.
I can't wait to read the updated Good Girls Guide (the companion book to this one).
They emphasize over and over that sex is meant to be mutual, intimate and pleasurable for BOTH.
This book is mostly aimed at young couples or newlyweds (this would be a perfect wedding present or shower gift) but there is plenty of great advice for couples who have been married for a while and may be struggling (definitely get The Great Sex Rescue too if that's the case).
The Gregories really hit the right note I think: this book is filled with grace and redemption and and the love of Christ. If a husband is to love his wife as Christ loves the church then this is a powerful place to start. If there are hurts that need healing then this is a safe place to start. If you just really want to know how to rock your wife's world, this is a great place to start.
This book was thorough but a quick read, it's a great resource for pastors and counselors to use with couples in pre marital and marriage counseling (The discussion questions in the appendix would work great in that setting.) It isn't really written to just hand to a teenager but it would be a great book for a parent to read before talking with their teens about sex.
I can't wait to read the updated Good Girls Guide (the companion book to this one).
February 26, 2022
I think this is the best review I can give: My wife loved this book…and she didn’t read a word! ;)
(I showed that first sentence to her before continuing to write, and she laughed, saying, “Yep! Sounds about right!”)
To be a little more real about the book itself, and not just the results: I was pumped to be on the launch team for this book and read an advance copy after reading Great Sex Rescue during my engagement last year. That book brought so much clarity and healing to me and blessing to my relationship—I grew up in a conservative evangelical environment—that I couldn’t wait to read this book. To be real, at first I was a little disappointed, mostly because I was expecting the same confrontational, hard-hitting approach from page one. Instead, a bit like the sexual response cycle Keith and Sheila discuss, the book builds over time. This book truly is a guide to healthy, mutual, enjoyable sex. I found it filled in gaps and questions in my understanding that I didn’t know I had, and as I read it, I regularly found my mind and soul refreshed (and sometimes challenged) by truth. I plan to review it regularly and recommend it often!
(I showed that first sentence to her before continuing to write, and she laughed, saying, “Yep! Sounds about right!”)
To be a little more real about the book itself, and not just the results: I was pumped to be on the launch team for this book and read an advance copy after reading Great Sex Rescue during my engagement last year. That book brought so much clarity and healing to me and blessing to my relationship—I grew up in a conservative evangelical environment—that I couldn’t wait to read this book. To be real, at first I was a little disappointed, mostly because I was expecting the same confrontational, hard-hitting approach from page one. Instead, a bit like the sexual response cycle Keith and Sheila discuss, the book builds over time. This book truly is a guide to healthy, mutual, enjoyable sex. I found it filled in gaps and questions in my understanding that I didn’t know I had, and as I read it, I regularly found my mind and soul refreshed (and sometimes challenged) by truth. I plan to review it regularly and recommend it often!
February 15, 2022
Purity culture taught me a bunch of harmful beliefs about sexuality and marriage that I have spent the last few years trying to unlearn and rebuild with healthy narratives. Both Keith and Sheila teach with power and purity on the topic of sexuality! This book is full of deep wisdom and practical tools to shift any toxic narratives you may be carrying about sex. I will certainly be recommending to all of my friends!
March 4, 2022
I can not recommend this book enough - or any of Sheila Wray Gregoire's books! I will be giving this book (and the companion Good Girls Guide) to all engaged couples I know as the best engagement present they will ever get!
March 12, 2022
*Excellent science-based book* with a Christian framing written by co-authors who have a background as a physician (Keith) and writing/blogging/podcasting for many years on this topic (Sheila). What I love about this book is everything is easy to understand and practical with clear steps on what to do to create an intimate mutual experience both people can look toward to.
Keith and Sheila vulnerably share their own story of pain and growth in this area, what men think from a survey of 3000 men, and what up-to-date scientific research says. Unlike many best selling Christian marriage books, it’s not about someone’s opinion with a few Bible verses thrown in.
Chapter 2 and 3 dives right into the medical side of things including specifics of types of contraception with pros and cons and easy graphics to understand the 2 different sexual response cycles that tend to vary by gender which explains a lot of the disconnect some couples feel. This is a book that acknowledges that these are *tendencies* and not absolutes so everyone is included.
It covers a wide variety of topics-the physical, emotional and spiritual side to intimacy in marriage with sections on porn, trauma etc
This book is perfect for MANY groups of people 1) men who want a great marriage full of desire and pleasure for both 2) parents who want good info for their sons 3) couples preparing for marriage and gifts for wedding showers, 4) women who want to understand what men are reading 5) singles who want good information 6) pastors/counselors/mentors for good information to share 7)small groups to study and discuss 8) anyone else I left out. 😀
Keith and Sheila vulnerably share their own story of pain and growth in this area, what men think from a survey of 3000 men, and what up-to-date scientific research says. Unlike many best selling Christian marriage books, it’s not about someone’s opinion with a few Bible verses thrown in.
Chapter 2 and 3 dives right into the medical side of things including specifics of types of contraception with pros and cons and easy graphics to understand the 2 different sexual response cycles that tend to vary by gender which explains a lot of the disconnect some couples feel. This is a book that acknowledges that these are *tendencies* and not absolutes so everyone is included.
It covers a wide variety of topics-the physical, emotional and spiritual side to intimacy in marriage with sections on porn, trauma etc
This book is perfect for MANY groups of people 1) men who want a great marriage full of desire and pleasure for both 2) parents who want good info for their sons 3) couples preparing for marriage and gifts for wedding showers, 4) women who want to understand what men are reading 5) singles who want good information 6) pastors/counselors/mentors for good information to share 7)small groups to study and discuss 8) anyone else I left out. 😀
March 4, 2022
I think this is an excellent, well-rounded book that covers all the bases (pun not intended!) of what is needed for a happy, fulfilling sex life. It addresses things often left out of other Christian marriage/sex books, and avoids a lot of the pitfalls "purity culture" has brought about in the church. It addresses how important consent is before sex - yes, even in marriage! It addresses the harmful message of every man struggling with lust, and it gives helpful advice to men about how *most* women's bodies work. It is a book full of hope and fun and doesn't beat around the bush. They say outright that porn is bad all the time, that if your wife isn't enjoying sex it isn't just her fault, and that men need to get off their butts and be engaged in the marriage.
A few excellent quotes: "By teaching that lust is a natural and inevitable response to seeing a woman, we equate male sexual desire with the objectification of women. Not only does that needlessly shame men for having a normal sexual drive when they have done nothing wrong; it also gives men a free pass when they are being creepy and inappropriate." "Part of what we get wrong in our discussion of lust is that we frame lust as an assault on men's purity instead of an assault on women's personhood." "She spent her whole life with the constant background noise of worries about sexual violence and being objectified. And then to be told that God says she needs to let her husband use her or he will fall into sin? It feels as if God is objectifying her too. It feels as if God is coercing her into Sex. It feels as if not one cares that this is her body."
A few excellent quotes: "By teaching that lust is a natural and inevitable response to seeing a woman, we equate male sexual desire with the objectification of women. Not only does that needlessly shame men for having a normal sexual drive when they have done nothing wrong; it also gives men a free pass when they are being creepy and inappropriate." "Part of what we get wrong in our discussion of lust is that we frame lust as an assault on men's purity instead of an assault on women's personhood." "She spent her whole life with the constant background noise of worries about sexual violence and being objectified. And then to be told that God says she needs to let her husband use her or he will fall into sin? It feels as if God is objectifying her too. It feels as if God is coercing her into Sex. It feels as if not one cares that this is her body."
December 8, 2025
We received an advance copy for reviewing purposes.
My husband's review:
As a guy, reading books about sex (or marriage books about it) was a consistent exercise in either confusion or disgust. The usual messages I got were:
1. The book was written with the understanding that it was going to be read by a woman. The only exception could possibly be a small study group.
2. The key to good sex was about simply having it more; not about creating actual, deep connection with your spouse.
3. Guys are in essence, disgusting sexual pigs who can’t control themselves.
4. If you don’t want sex all the time as a guy, or fit in what the author says is “normal” or “right”, you’re not a “real man”.
5. A wife’s main purpose in sex is simply to “satisfy her husband”, often completely ignoring the possibility that the guy’s satisfaction is more tied to his wife actually enjoying it and being an active and equal participant rather than how often they have it.
Honestly, it had gotten to the point where I had all but given up on ever finding a book about sex (from Christian principles) that was actually written for men. So it was met with great anticipation when Sheila announced that she’d be writing “The Good Guy’s Guide To Great Sex” with her husband Keith as co-author. I have loved Sheila’s previous books, as well as her blog and podcast. And this exceeded my expectations.
This book is truly written with men as the primary audience, and it is informative, inspiring, and a true eye-opener. Without discrimination, it points out a lot of the lies we have believed about sex (cultural or otherwise) and points us in an evidence-based direction. They acknowledge what is “normal” while also not forgetting those who don’t fit with the majority. They point us to a more holistic mindset of what sex actually is (turns out, it’s not just intercourse). And above all, it upholds biblical teachings, like placing the needs of your spouse first – even in the area of sex.
A lot of people may take primary notes of the debunking of beliefs commonly held in Evangelical circles, but what really stood out to me was that this book takes a complete and fair look at everything it touches on. Using their survey of 3,000 men, they take their findings and show what they mean, whether it supports or destroys common Evangelical teachings.
And to put the icing on the cake, this whole book is written with the understanding that it’s not just for married men. There’s even an appendix that thoughtfully helps grooms-to-be to be better prepared their honeymoon (oh to have read this before mine)! This is actually a book I can honestly (and with a clean conscience) recommend to other guys – married or otherwise. It makes its case, using both evidence and scripture to form what sex really is, and what it could be for those willing to make it so.
My husband's review:
As a guy, reading books about sex (or marriage books about it) was a consistent exercise in either confusion or disgust. The usual messages I got were:
1. The book was written with the understanding that it was going to be read by a woman. The only exception could possibly be a small study group.
2. The key to good sex was about simply having it more; not about creating actual, deep connection with your spouse.
3. Guys are in essence, disgusting sexual pigs who can’t control themselves.
4. If you don’t want sex all the time as a guy, or fit in what the author says is “normal” or “right”, you’re not a “real man”.
5. A wife’s main purpose in sex is simply to “satisfy her husband”, often completely ignoring the possibility that the guy’s satisfaction is more tied to his wife actually enjoying it and being an active and equal participant rather than how often they have it.
Honestly, it had gotten to the point where I had all but given up on ever finding a book about sex (from Christian principles) that was actually written for men. So it was met with great anticipation when Sheila announced that she’d be writing “The Good Guy’s Guide To Great Sex” with her husband Keith as co-author. I have loved Sheila’s previous books, as well as her blog and podcast. And this exceeded my expectations.
This book is truly written with men as the primary audience, and it is informative, inspiring, and a true eye-opener. Without discrimination, it points out a lot of the lies we have believed about sex (cultural or otherwise) and points us in an evidence-based direction. They acknowledge what is “normal” while also not forgetting those who don’t fit with the majority. They point us to a more holistic mindset of what sex actually is (turns out, it’s not just intercourse). And above all, it upholds biblical teachings, like placing the needs of your spouse first – even in the area of sex.
A lot of people may take primary notes of the debunking of beliefs commonly held in Evangelical circles, but what really stood out to me was that this book takes a complete and fair look at everything it touches on. Using their survey of 3,000 men, they take their findings and show what they mean, whether it supports or destroys common Evangelical teachings.
And to put the icing on the cake, this whole book is written with the understanding that it’s not just for married men. There’s even an appendix that thoughtfully helps grooms-to-be to be better prepared their honeymoon (oh to have read this before mine)! This is actually a book I can honestly (and with a clean conscience) recommend to other guys – married or otherwise. It makes its case, using both evidence and scripture to form what sex really is, and what it could be for those willing to make it so.
March 8, 2022
I found this book to be a breathe of fresh air in terms of the typical way evangelical books look at sex. There is no obligation sex or entitlement mentality here. This book goes beyond the act of intercourse and digs deep into what intimacy truly is, what Christian husbands can do to build friendship, spiritual closeness and sexual intimacy with their wives in a way that truly enriches their whole marriage. I really appreciated how it calls men to work on their own spiritual and emotional maturity. I think what also distinguishes this book from the other Christian sex books I have read is how it goes in depth into the sexual response cycle, as well as giving a real biblical definition of lust that lifts the burden of "noticing" attractive people off of men's shoulders. It is also clear about consent, coercion and when to seek professional help in your marriage (or before you get married). The honeymoon section is practical and excellent as well. I look forward to recommending this book and the companion book girl's book to our church and any newly weds as well as married couples struggling in their sex lives!
March 12, 2022
“You must unlearn what you have learned” – Master Yoda
Following on the heels of “The Great Sex Rescue”, “The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex” continues the mission to tear down unbiblical and unscientific teachings in the church and to re-discover God’s true design for physical intimacy in marriage. This book is an excellent resource for men seeking to be married, newly married men, and even men who are long passed the newlywed stage.
If you grew up in the purity culture like I did you heard a ton of terrible messages about sex. The purity culture objectified women and painted men as lustful animals. It treated sex in marriage as a wife’s obligation rather than a true “knowing and joining” of two spouses.
This book helps the reader to “unlearn” these false teachings and to instead see and apply their sexuality in the pure light of God’s design. This book explains in detail that men are not designed by God to be monsters. We can have victory over lust. We can have a truly intimate and pleasurable sex life with our spouse. There is so much healing in this book it makes me want to tear up. I wish I had had this book before I got married and I encourage every man who is or wants to be married to read it.
The structure of the book is well laid out. It touches a wide variety of topics including the "philosophical" (God's design for great sex) as well as the scientific and technical. The book makes clear that God made sex to be mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both husbands and wives. The authors go into detail on the sexual response cycle and explain how church culture’s misconceptions about sex often lead to the wife’s sexual response being short-circuited. They also share a boatload of data on the impact of the false teachings of purity culture and how it has especially hurt women.
The authors give concrete advice on how we as husbands can be truly intimate with our wives and help them discover their God given sexuality. The descriptions on how to prioritize the wife’s pleasure were excellent and I liked how the authors were detailed enough without making it sound like some sort of written procedure (Step 1. Take off clothes, Step 2. etc.). lol
Keith's medical expertise really comes through in Ch. 2 with his clear and concise medical definitions. The "pros" and "cons" information for the contraception section was the best I have ever seen in a Christian marriage book.
When discussing subjects such as spontaneous vs. responsive libido I appreciated that the authors spoke in generalities. For example, while men are 3 times more likely to be spontaneous that doesn't mean all men are spontaneous. It’s so good to see a Christian marriage book where a person is NOT treated as broken if they don’t fall into the general trendline.
Something I also enjoyed about this book is that it is not only a good book on sex but it also gives high quality marriage advice. The stories and advice in Ch. 8 about being emotionally connected and spending quality time together were so great.
Some nitpicks: No book is perfect and I have a few nitpicks.
While the authors are clear in Ch. 6 “Ladies First” that they aren’t treating “she climaxes first” as a hard and fast rule I would have appreciated additional discussion for the case where a wife finds sex uncomfortable after orgasm.
Also, their discussion on marital aids was a little bit truncated. I would have appreciated more discussion on situations where a couple requires a marital aid in order for sex to be pleasurable (medication issues, disability, etc.).
Overall, I give the book 4.8 out of 5 stars (96%). This book is a game changer that can positively impact generations of men and women. Please buy this book and buy more copies for the men around you.
Following on the heels of “The Great Sex Rescue”, “The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex” continues the mission to tear down unbiblical and unscientific teachings in the church and to re-discover God’s true design for physical intimacy in marriage. This book is an excellent resource for men seeking to be married, newly married men, and even men who are long passed the newlywed stage.
If you grew up in the purity culture like I did you heard a ton of terrible messages about sex. The purity culture objectified women and painted men as lustful animals. It treated sex in marriage as a wife’s obligation rather than a true “knowing and joining” of two spouses.
This book helps the reader to “unlearn” these false teachings and to instead see and apply their sexuality in the pure light of God’s design. This book explains in detail that men are not designed by God to be monsters. We can have victory over lust. We can have a truly intimate and pleasurable sex life with our spouse. There is so much healing in this book it makes me want to tear up. I wish I had had this book before I got married and I encourage every man who is or wants to be married to read it.
The structure of the book is well laid out. It touches a wide variety of topics including the "philosophical" (God's design for great sex) as well as the scientific and technical. The book makes clear that God made sex to be mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both husbands and wives. The authors go into detail on the sexual response cycle and explain how church culture’s misconceptions about sex often lead to the wife’s sexual response being short-circuited. They also share a boatload of data on the impact of the false teachings of purity culture and how it has especially hurt women.
The authors give concrete advice on how we as husbands can be truly intimate with our wives and help them discover their God given sexuality. The descriptions on how to prioritize the wife’s pleasure were excellent and I liked how the authors were detailed enough without making it sound like some sort of written procedure (Step 1. Take off clothes, Step 2. etc.). lol
Keith's medical expertise really comes through in Ch. 2 with his clear and concise medical definitions. The "pros" and "cons" information for the contraception section was the best I have ever seen in a Christian marriage book.
When discussing subjects such as spontaneous vs. responsive libido I appreciated that the authors spoke in generalities. For example, while men are 3 times more likely to be spontaneous that doesn't mean all men are spontaneous. It’s so good to see a Christian marriage book where a person is NOT treated as broken if they don’t fall into the general trendline.
Something I also enjoyed about this book is that it is not only a good book on sex but it also gives high quality marriage advice. The stories and advice in Ch. 8 about being emotionally connected and spending quality time together were so great.
Some nitpicks: No book is perfect and I have a few nitpicks.
While the authors are clear in Ch. 6 “Ladies First” that they aren’t treating “she climaxes first” as a hard and fast rule I would have appreciated additional discussion for the case where a wife finds sex uncomfortable after orgasm.
Also, their discussion on marital aids was a little bit truncated. I would have appreciated more discussion on situations where a couple requires a marital aid in order for sex to be pleasurable (medication issues, disability, etc.).
Overall, I give the book 4.8 out of 5 stars (96%). This book is a game changer that can positively impact generations of men and women. Please buy this book and buy more copies for the men around you.
March 8, 2022
As a single mom, I have searched high and low to find books that I can feel good about passing on to my sons someday. Books that will teach and encourage them to have a healthy view of women, marriage, sex, and their role as Godly husbands.
I started out years ago reading many of the popular Christian marriage and sex books out of sheer necessity and desperation. I was looking for answers but not fully understanding at the time that much of what I was experiencing in my marriage was abuse. As I read these other “Christian marriage” books, I was seeing a picture being painted that told me sex was more for him than for me, sex was his need and was owed to him. I was counseled to give him more sex, told my body was not my own, and I was to respect him unconditionally, among many other ideas that proved to be very harmful in perpetuating the abuse in my marriage. I was always left with the idea that I was the one that needed to do better, try harder and give more even though I was the one consistently giving, and he was the one consistently taking and receiving.
This is where Keith and Shelia’s book comes in. Deep down I desperately needed to believe that what I experienced was not how God intended marriage and sex to be. I was not broken or wrong to feel the way I was feeling. I knew sex was not supposed to only be for him or leave me feeling used. Sex was not meant to cause emotional and physical pain; it was not meant to leave me feeling devalued like I was an object instead of a human being, yet that is what was being conveyed repeatedly. This is the very reason that this book is desperately needed in Christian circles. So many of the books on the market encourage and/or downplay abuse as normal or at the least they encourage neglect or complete lack of understanding when it comes to the wife’s sexual workings. She is most definitely an afterthought in many of them. It took me years to work through the trauma of the bad advice that was given, and this absolutely needs to change.
I know there are good men out there, men who want to honor and love their wives. They want their sex lives to be mutually satisfying and enjoyable for their wives in the way that God intended. Men this book truly is a gift to you if you will only take the time to read it and process the truth of what it says it quite literally could change your sex life into something you never thought possible.
I am personally beyond thrilled to finally have a book I can feel good about passing on to my sons and my daughter’s future husband. It will be the first book I give as a gift to any soon-to-be newlyweds or couples struggling in their marriage.
I started out years ago reading many of the popular Christian marriage and sex books out of sheer necessity and desperation. I was looking for answers but not fully understanding at the time that much of what I was experiencing in my marriage was abuse. As I read these other “Christian marriage” books, I was seeing a picture being painted that told me sex was more for him than for me, sex was his need and was owed to him. I was counseled to give him more sex, told my body was not my own, and I was to respect him unconditionally, among many other ideas that proved to be very harmful in perpetuating the abuse in my marriage. I was always left with the idea that I was the one that needed to do better, try harder and give more even though I was the one consistently giving, and he was the one consistently taking and receiving.
This is where Keith and Shelia’s book comes in. Deep down I desperately needed to believe that what I experienced was not how God intended marriage and sex to be. I was not broken or wrong to feel the way I was feeling. I knew sex was not supposed to only be for him or leave me feeling used. Sex was not meant to cause emotional and physical pain; it was not meant to leave me feeling devalued like I was an object instead of a human being, yet that is what was being conveyed repeatedly. This is the very reason that this book is desperately needed in Christian circles. So many of the books on the market encourage and/or downplay abuse as normal or at the least they encourage neglect or complete lack of understanding when it comes to the wife’s sexual workings. She is most definitely an afterthought in many of them. It took me years to work through the trauma of the bad advice that was given, and this absolutely needs to change.
I know there are good men out there, men who want to honor and love their wives. They want their sex lives to be mutually satisfying and enjoyable for their wives in the way that God intended. Men this book truly is a gift to you if you will only take the time to read it and process the truth of what it says it quite literally could change your sex life into something you never thought possible.
I am personally beyond thrilled to finally have a book I can feel good about passing on to my sons and my daughter’s future husband. It will be the first book I give as a gift to any soon-to-be newlyweds or couples struggling in their marriage.
March 15, 2022
There are stacks of books available on the topic of sex, so what makes this collaboration between Sheila Wray Gregoire and her husband Keith Gregoire a standout? Well, a number of things.
Unlike many if not most of the others, this selection goes beyond the standard instruction manual. Readers will not be limited to a how to guide to " touch here, kiss there, and get ready for physical rapture". No, no, no. This resource provides a well rounded approach to married sex. The text is divided into three helpful parts, covering but not limited to the following:
-How sex works, including physiology and the sexual response cycle
-Physical pleasure, obviously, lol
-Emotional closeness vs. mere physical transaction
-Spiritual intimacy
-What to do when things are not working
-Sexual addictions
-Honeymoon tips
-Discussion questions
Written from a Christian worldview, couples coming from a variety of backgrounds will find this an excellent resource, as it covers subjects common to everyone.
At the risk of sounding trite, this is the book you'll wish that you had read before the wedding, or at least in the earliest days of your marriage. It will help set newlyweds on a healthy track early on. For those considering this book as married veterans, including those couples who have had great struggle in their sex lives, this book can provide hope as it offers the opportunity to reset wrong thinking that may have lead to unhealthy patterns and practices. There is hope!
This book is one to get on as many book shelves as possible. Newlyweds and beyond will find help, encouragement, and hope within this guide.
Unlike many if not most of the others, this selection goes beyond the standard instruction manual. Readers will not be limited to a how to guide to " touch here, kiss there, and get ready for physical rapture". No, no, no. This resource provides a well rounded approach to married sex. The text is divided into three helpful parts, covering but not limited to the following:
-How sex works, including physiology and the sexual response cycle
-Physical pleasure, obviously, lol
-Emotional closeness vs. mere physical transaction
-Spiritual intimacy
-What to do when things are not working
-Sexual addictions
-Honeymoon tips
-Discussion questions
Written from a Christian worldview, couples coming from a variety of backgrounds will find this an excellent resource, as it covers subjects common to everyone.
At the risk of sounding trite, this is the book you'll wish that you had read before the wedding, or at least in the earliest days of your marriage. It will help set newlyweds on a healthy track early on. For those considering this book as married veterans, including those couples who have had great struggle in their sex lives, this book can provide hope as it offers the opportunity to reset wrong thinking that may have lead to unhealthy patterns and practices. There is hope!
This book is one to get on as many book shelves as possible. Newlyweds and beyond will find help, encouragement, and hope within this guide.
March 15, 2022
I started the book expecting it to be good, because I've read some of Sheila's other content.
However, I was blown away and my expectations were shattered at what I read. It wasn't good. It was amazing. It was really that fantastic. I made my husband read it of course.
Sheila takes everyone - the soon to be married virgin, the victim of purity culture, the new Christian still sleeping with his girlfriend - and gives them a glimpse of what a great sex life within a loving marriage can be like. Fireworks.
She doesn't just say "this is what it can be like" - she shows you how to get there.
The book is full of helpful graphics from the research she has conducted. She has evidence to back up her claims, which she presents in a very readable, friendly way.
I especially enjoyed how she explained the sexual response cycle. If you've never heard of that, read the book! I had never heard of it before but suddenly it makes sense.
I will be loaning my copy of this book to every male friend of mine who is getting married. And buying the girls version to give to their fiancé's too.
This book is going to help so many relationships. Thank you for writing it Sheila.
However, I was blown away and my expectations were shattered at what I read. It wasn't good. It was amazing. It was really that fantastic. I made my husband read it of course.
Sheila takes everyone - the soon to be married virgin, the victim of purity culture, the new Christian still sleeping with his girlfriend - and gives them a glimpse of what a great sex life within a loving marriage can be like. Fireworks.
She doesn't just say "this is what it can be like" - she shows you how to get there.
The book is full of helpful graphics from the research she has conducted. She has evidence to back up her claims, which she presents in a very readable, friendly way.
I especially enjoyed how she explained the sexual response cycle. If you've never heard of that, read the book! I had never heard of it before but suddenly it makes sense.
I will be loaning my copy of this book to every male friend of mine who is getting married. And buying the girls version to give to their fiancé's too.
This book is going to help so many relationships. Thank you for writing it Sheila.
March 15, 2022
The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex is a book like no other I have read (and I have read a lot of sex and relationship books). Honestly, I liked it even more than its companion book for women because I felt like I was getting to be part of a sacred message to Christain husbands in a time when many men are looking for help. We live in such a pornified culture, and unfortunately, the Church has not done a better job at casting a holistic vision for marital intimacy or speaking openly about the things that complicate sexual intimacy. The Gregoire’s have written a primer for men on how to be a good lover beginning with friendship, emotional and spiritual connection, and tasteful sexual education. Using research, the book walks through the stages of arousal and troubleshoots a variety of issues Christian couples might face, including the orgasm gap between men and women, pornography addiction, and past sexual abuse. The practical messages for growing intimacy are hope-fillled, and I also appreciate the recommendation to seek professional counseling when issues get too big. I can’t wait to recommend this book to my Christian sex addiction and betrayal trauma clients.
March 17, 2022
This book is Christian approach to married sex and I found it to be comprehensive, unapologetic, and extremely positive. The book provides a lot of scientific information, as well as great questions and talking points for couples around spiritual/emotional intimacy and physical intimacy. The statistics from the survey they conducted were enlightening.
I’ve read other Christian books about marriage and had a lot of difficulty getting onboard with the typical man/woman roles that those books assume and encourage. I have found that those same books encourage some truly unhealthy and abusive behaviors in what should be a safe and sacred space for both spouses. This book shows a path that encourages ALL forms of intimacy as a safe and enriching expression in marriage, for either partner. This book allows for individuality and preferences, regardless of gender. I find this to be so refreshing and novel in the Christian marriage and sex genre.
I would recommend this book to ANY Christian person who would like to have a loving, mutually satisfying relationship with their spouse (or future spouse).
I’ve read other Christian books about marriage and had a lot of difficulty getting onboard with the typical man/woman roles that those books assume and encourage. I have found that those same books encourage some truly unhealthy and abusive behaviors in what should be a safe and sacred space for both spouses. This book shows a path that encourages ALL forms of intimacy as a safe and enriching expression in marriage, for either partner. This book allows for individuality and preferences, regardless of gender. I find this to be so refreshing and novel in the Christian marriage and sex genre.
I would recommend this book to ANY Christian person who would like to have a loving, mutually satisfying relationship with their spouse (or future spouse).
March 11, 2022
What I most appreciated about this book in particular compared to other Christian sex/marriage books is that it is based in evidence, and not the stereotypes you commonly see when conservatives talk about sex. (Crockpot/microwave, anyone?) That is not to say it is a heavy read, far from it! I enjoyed the way information was presented. I'm thankful especially for the explanation of arousal cycles, how that practically affects couples and their sexual relationship. That key information was missing in every book I read prior to my marriage. Other highlights include a honeymoon overview, an introduction to vaginismus, a helpful explanation of the "orgasm gap" and what to do about it. It's about time Christian marriages have a book like this one and it's companion.
Read
March 16, 2022I really appreciated the overall approach of this book, particularly the parts about the sexual response cycle and discussing how noticing is not the same thing as lusting. There were many great parts of this book that I think will bring so much healing to both men and women.
March 7, 2022
Oh, my goodness! This book is SO informative! And it doesn’t just assume men are incapable of being Christlike. The book is very practical and covers a plethora of information on how arousal works in men versus women. It explains lust, which other books just assume all men are unable to not lust when a woman walks into their path. Not this book. This one lets you know that there is a difference between noticing a woman and actively imagining things about her. The entire time, it encourages a mature stand on viewing the wife with honor without degrading the male reader. I see this as an excellent tool to correct so many horrible ideas that have seeped into Christain’s thoughts. It is even a great read for a man who is engaged, and could absolutely save that couple from years of frustration. I highly recommend it for all married guys as well as ones who know who their future wife is.
March 17, 2022
Every once in a while, I find a book that makes me wonder "how have we, as humans, survived this long without accepting the truths presented in this book as common knowledge?" "The Good Guys Guide to Great $3ks" (TGGGTGS) is one of those books. (And I think the answer to my question is: yes we've survived, but we've really struggled in this area, to the great detriment of women.)
I can honestly say that in my experience, TGGGTGS is the first of its kind. I've never before read a book that presents healthy $3ksuality for men, from a Christian perspective, in such a holistic manner.
This review has two parts: 1) review of the content and 2) what I learned/had confirmed.
1) Content
TGGGTGS is comprised of three parts. The first part lays a great foundation by doing three things. The first is explaining why great $3ks is closely tied with intimacy and why the $3ksual experience was designed for both the husband and wife EQUALLY. The second is providing a great summary of the physical aspects of $3ks: i.e, body parts involved and how $3ks actually works. The third, and I think most eye-opening to me, is explaining the $3ksual response cycle, and how it differs between men and women (generally speaking). This chapter alone should be a game-changer for most couples.
The second part delves into the three components of great $3ks: physical pleasure, emotional companionship and closeness, and spiritual intimacy and oneness. This is the meat of the book and there is too much for me to unpack in this review but I want to highlight some key points.
The first is that there is a huge orgasm gap between men and women, especially in the church. I think many of us have been indoctrinated into thinking that women aren't as $3ksual as men, or only want $3ks so they can feel an emotional connection. I believe this leads to the belief that women don't really need to orgasm and the fact that many husbands don't prioritize it. The Gregoires discuss this in depth and explains why it is so important for our marriages that husbands prioritize our wives pleasure in the bedroom.
The second major point of this section is that $3ks and intimacy are inextricably linked and that $3ks is more about making love than just "having $3ks." On page 122, this is summed up extremely well:
'Great $3ks, then, isn't saying "I want $3ks." Great $3ks is about saying "I want you." I want to know you. I want to experience everything with you. I want to feel like we are one. "Being one" - that spiritual connection- is the completion of physical intimacy and emotional intimacy. Once we figure out how our bodies work together, once we become vulnerable with one another and share with each other, then passion naturally flows.'
The third major point I wish to highlight in the second part is the harm that pornography does. The chapter on this is very helpful because it dispels existing myths concerning porn use and also presents several encouraging facts.
The third part is a short wrap-up with only one chapter but it is important because it challenges husbands to create intimacy with their wives regardless of libido differences. There are also two appendices at the end: the first prepares you for your honeymoon, and the second has discussion questions.
I want to emphasize that what I've just written is barely scratching the surface of what is in TGGGTGS. There are many other important points that are discussed throughout the book.
Stylistically speaking, the book is very easy to read and it is also well edited.
2) What I learned / had confirmed
There is a huge lack of proper guidance from the church on human $3ksuality. It is either not talked about at all, or it is presented from the context of "men need $3ks, women need emotional intimacy." That message (which has seemingly been the ONLY Christian message about $3ks) is terrible. The reason it's terrible is this: it completely dismisses the truth that $3ks was created by God to be mutually enjoyable for both husbands AND wives. There is a huge segment of women in the Church who have been completely short-changed by this old message. And there is a huge segment of men in the church who don't realize that they ALSO have been short-changed by that message.
I think one of the reasons men buy into that message is because of this: we experience some truth in it. But I don't think it is a truth based on what is actually healthy. I think we experience it because we are actually broken. For instance, I think that men believe that we have a deep physical need for $3ks. But what I've learned is that what we really have a deep need for is intimacy. But we conflate the two because 1) they are tied together, and 2) we don't know what intimacy looks like. So we think we are not getting enough $3ks, but what we are really not getting enough of is intimacy. I think a huge population of Christian men don't have a truly intimate connection with their wives. This results in a lack of trust and wives not having as strong a desire for $3ks as the husbands. This results in men feeling like they aren't "getting enough."
What if that old message is wrong? What if that deep down- your wife is a $3ksual dynamo- and all it would take for you to experience $3ksual bliss with her is for you to do some work on yourself? Maybe change some of your preconceived notions? Work, such as the following: ensuring that you treat her as an equal. This will help win her trust. Prioritize intimacy and connection. Get to KNOW her. Be a man who resembles Christ in acting like a servant-leader rather than a tyrant. Don't feel or act entitled to $3ks. Be a giver rather than a taker in the bedroom. Take the time to understand your wife's body and what turns HER on. Be patient, and prioritize her pleasure. These suggestions are just a brief summary of suggestions found throughout the book. And, I can speak from experience, that if you do these things- your satisfaction with your $3ks life will shoot through the roof. You will care less and less about the quantity of $3ks you think need, and more and more about the quality of the $3ks you are actually sharing with your wife.
I recognize the truths presented in TGGGTGS, not because I discovered them in the book, but because it's taken 25 (often pain-staking) years to learn them (with my wife's help) and put them into practice. I have a blissful marriage with my wife. We enjoy deep and mutually satisfying emotional, physical and spiritual intimacy. It was not always this way. We both had to complete a MASSIVE amount of hard work to get here. We had to heal from trauma. We had to learn how to communicate and how to be transparent. We had to be humble and accept sometimes that we were just going to have to tough it out. I am telling you though, that I believe that we would not have had to work nearly as hard as we did, if we had a book to read JUST LIKE THIS ONE. The Gregoires took all the things we've learned the hard way and packaged them up (with a few other things that were new to me) in an easy-to-read book.
In conclusion, I want to say that I would spare you the trial and error that I went through. I believe TGGGTGS will start you out on the right course if you are single or newly married or put you on the right course if you have the Christ-like humility to be able to allow it to change you.
I can honestly say that in my experience, TGGGTGS is the first of its kind. I've never before read a book that presents healthy $3ksuality for men, from a Christian perspective, in such a holistic manner.
This review has two parts: 1) review of the content and 2) what I learned/had confirmed.
1) Content
TGGGTGS is comprised of three parts. The first part lays a great foundation by doing three things. The first is explaining why great $3ks is closely tied with intimacy and why the $3ksual experience was designed for both the husband and wife EQUALLY. The second is providing a great summary of the physical aspects of $3ks: i.e, body parts involved and how $3ks actually works. The third, and I think most eye-opening to me, is explaining the $3ksual response cycle, and how it differs between men and women (generally speaking). This chapter alone should be a game-changer for most couples.
The second part delves into the three components of great $3ks: physical pleasure, emotional companionship and closeness, and spiritual intimacy and oneness. This is the meat of the book and there is too much for me to unpack in this review but I want to highlight some key points.
The first is that there is a huge orgasm gap between men and women, especially in the church. I think many of us have been indoctrinated into thinking that women aren't as $3ksual as men, or only want $3ks so they can feel an emotional connection. I believe this leads to the belief that women don't really need to orgasm and the fact that many husbands don't prioritize it. The Gregoires discuss this in depth and explains why it is so important for our marriages that husbands prioritize our wives pleasure in the bedroom.
The second major point of this section is that $3ks and intimacy are inextricably linked and that $3ks is more about making love than just "having $3ks." On page 122, this is summed up extremely well:
'Great $3ks, then, isn't saying "I want $3ks." Great $3ks is about saying "I want you." I want to know you. I want to experience everything with you. I want to feel like we are one. "Being one" - that spiritual connection- is the completion of physical intimacy and emotional intimacy. Once we figure out how our bodies work together, once we become vulnerable with one another and share with each other, then passion naturally flows.'
The third major point I wish to highlight in the second part is the harm that pornography does. The chapter on this is very helpful because it dispels existing myths concerning porn use and also presents several encouraging facts.
The third part is a short wrap-up with only one chapter but it is important because it challenges husbands to create intimacy with their wives regardless of libido differences. There are also two appendices at the end: the first prepares you for your honeymoon, and the second has discussion questions.
I want to emphasize that what I've just written is barely scratching the surface of what is in TGGGTGS. There are many other important points that are discussed throughout the book.
Stylistically speaking, the book is very easy to read and it is also well edited.
2) What I learned / had confirmed
There is a huge lack of proper guidance from the church on human $3ksuality. It is either not talked about at all, or it is presented from the context of "men need $3ks, women need emotional intimacy." That message (which has seemingly been the ONLY Christian message about $3ks) is terrible. The reason it's terrible is this: it completely dismisses the truth that $3ks was created by God to be mutually enjoyable for both husbands AND wives. There is a huge segment of women in the Church who have been completely short-changed by this old message. And there is a huge segment of men in the church who don't realize that they ALSO have been short-changed by that message.
I think one of the reasons men buy into that message is because of this: we experience some truth in it. But I don't think it is a truth based on what is actually healthy. I think we experience it because we are actually broken. For instance, I think that men believe that we have a deep physical need for $3ks. But what I've learned is that what we really have a deep need for is intimacy. But we conflate the two because 1) they are tied together, and 2) we don't know what intimacy looks like. So we think we are not getting enough $3ks, but what we are really not getting enough of is intimacy. I think a huge population of Christian men don't have a truly intimate connection with their wives. This results in a lack of trust and wives not having as strong a desire for $3ks as the husbands. This results in men feeling like they aren't "getting enough."
What if that old message is wrong? What if that deep down- your wife is a $3ksual dynamo- and all it would take for you to experience $3ksual bliss with her is for you to do some work on yourself? Maybe change some of your preconceived notions? Work, such as the following: ensuring that you treat her as an equal. This will help win her trust. Prioritize intimacy and connection. Get to KNOW her. Be a man who resembles Christ in acting like a servant-leader rather than a tyrant. Don't feel or act entitled to $3ks. Be a giver rather than a taker in the bedroom. Take the time to understand your wife's body and what turns HER on. Be patient, and prioritize her pleasure. These suggestions are just a brief summary of suggestions found throughout the book. And, I can speak from experience, that if you do these things- your satisfaction with your $3ks life will shoot through the roof. You will care less and less about the quantity of $3ks you think need, and more and more about the quality of the $3ks you are actually sharing with your wife.
I recognize the truths presented in TGGGTGS, not because I discovered them in the book, but because it's taken 25 (often pain-staking) years to learn them (with my wife's help) and put them into practice. I have a blissful marriage with my wife. We enjoy deep and mutually satisfying emotional, physical and spiritual intimacy. It was not always this way. We both had to complete a MASSIVE amount of hard work to get here. We had to heal from trauma. We had to learn how to communicate and how to be transparent. We had to be humble and accept sometimes that we were just going to have to tough it out. I am telling you though, that I believe that we would not have had to work nearly as hard as we did, if we had a book to read JUST LIKE THIS ONE. The Gregoires took all the things we've learned the hard way and packaged them up (with a few other things that were new to me) in an easy-to-read book.
In conclusion, I want to say that I would spare you the trial and error that I went through. I believe TGGGTGS will start you out on the right course if you are single or newly married or put you on the right course if you have the Christ-like humility to be able to allow it to change you.
March 15, 2022
I wish my husband and I had this before we were married (almost 18 years ago) rather than the garbage books and sermons and tape we were given by so many people. This honestly would have been more helpful to us than the pre-marital counseling that we had.
The information is very clear without being creepy or graphic. There in chapter 3 they talks about the physical response cycle for men and women and the general time it takes for a women vs. generally for a man to climax and how important it is for men to know where their wives are in their arousal cycle to know what she might like (or really NOT like) in that moment. Know that your wife isn't broken for being different from you and she can enjoy intimacy as much (OR MORE) than you! So, if she isn't enjoying it now then you have some learning to do! And she might need to learn how she works as well. A lot of us good girls have no idea how we work and what even feels good. This part of our lives is a learning process and no one is going to know what to do before they know anything. Here is the book that has all the information you good guys need to know!
The Honey Moon part in Appendix 1 alone is worth the price of the book. But there is a chapter about the different types of birth control methods with pros and cons. Extremely practical and they don't tell you what to think or what to do, but just lay out all the information so the two of you can decide together what you want to choose and what might be right for both of you.
This book talks some about trauma as well as porn us and lust if that has been apart of either persons story. Nothing in the book is shaming though, it is all the advise and information and care that you would hope. As much as people can learn from this, I don't think anyone is going to feel dumb or talked down to when reading what they have to say.
This book along with the revamped "Good Girls Guide..." version would make a really great wedding or shower gifts. Or you can be like my husband and me who just really wanted to (finally!) read something from a Christian perspective that explained all this in a healthy mutually caring way. We all can kind of stumble through and figure out what we should have been told and what we should have known, but how refreshing is it to see, all in one place, the overall explanation of what intimacy in marriage should look like. The evidence based information that is healthy and mutual for both!
Lets all get on a trajectory of healthy and good intimacy to mutually enjoy this beautiful gift from God.
The information is very clear without being creepy or graphic. There in chapter 3 they talks about the physical response cycle for men and women and the general time it takes for a women vs. generally for a man to climax and how important it is for men to know where their wives are in their arousal cycle to know what she might like (or really NOT like) in that moment. Know that your wife isn't broken for being different from you and she can enjoy intimacy as much (OR MORE) than you! So, if she isn't enjoying it now then you have some learning to do! And she might need to learn how she works as well. A lot of us good girls have no idea how we work and what even feels good. This part of our lives is a learning process and no one is going to know what to do before they know anything. Here is the book that has all the information you good guys need to know!
The Honey Moon part in Appendix 1 alone is worth the price of the book. But there is a chapter about the different types of birth control methods with pros and cons. Extremely practical and they don't tell you what to think or what to do, but just lay out all the information so the two of you can decide together what you want to choose and what might be right for both of you.
This book talks some about trauma as well as porn us and lust if that has been apart of either persons story. Nothing in the book is shaming though, it is all the advise and information and care that you would hope. As much as people can learn from this, I don't think anyone is going to feel dumb or talked down to when reading what they have to say.
This book along with the revamped "Good Girls Guide..." version would make a really great wedding or shower gifts. Or you can be like my husband and me who just really wanted to (finally!) read something from a Christian perspective that explained all this in a healthy mutually caring way. We all can kind of stumble through and figure out what we should have been told and what we should have known, but how refreshing is it to see, all in one place, the overall explanation of what intimacy in marriage should look like. The evidence based information that is healthy and mutual for both!
Lets all get on a trajectory of healthy and good intimacy to mutually enjoy this beautiful gift from God.
March 15, 2022
The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex is the book that every engaged or newlywed man needs! It covers everything a man should know to help get sex off to a great start in marriage. This book will help couples to build a sex life that is mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both.
The Good Guy’s Guide will also be helpful for those who have been married for many years, but have never been given good and healthy instruction for sexual intimacy within marriage. If a couple is struggling with sexual intimacy in marriage, this is the book the husband needs to read! For women, there is a companion book that I highly recommend called, The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex.
There are two excellent appendices at the end of The Good Guy’s Guide (and the Good Girl’s Guide too). One is an appendix is about preparing for the honeymoon, and it is filled with good and practical advice. The other appendix contains helpful discussion questions for engaged couples and for married couples.
I recommend this book for both married and engaged men. The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex, and the companion book, The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, will become my “go to” wedding and shower gifts!
I received an advanced review copy of this book.
The Good Guy’s Guide will also be helpful for those who have been married for many years, but have never been given good and healthy instruction for sexual intimacy within marriage. If a couple is struggling with sexual intimacy in marriage, this is the book the husband needs to read! For women, there is a companion book that I highly recommend called, The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex.
There are two excellent appendices at the end of The Good Guy’s Guide (and the Good Girl’s Guide too). One is an appendix is about preparing for the honeymoon, and it is filled with good and practical advice. The other appendix contains helpful discussion questions for engaged couples and for married couples.
I recommend this book for both married and engaged men. The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex, and the companion book, The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, will become my “go to” wedding and shower gifts!
I received an advanced review copy of this book.
March 15, 2022
For those of you brought up in the conservative, purity focused, evangelical church circle this is another fantastic book launching today.
The church has got so so so much wrong about sexuallity, purity and sex in marriage, it's done tremendous damage. See #thegreatsexrescue for more on that.
If you are looking to start off on healthy footing, or are looking to rebuild after tearing down the lies that were holding your marriage in bondage please, please pick up this book.
It's helped my husband and I so much as we are working through a lot of crap beliefs we were taught.
Not all the conversations are easy, there have been lots of tears, apologies, and mutual grief over the damage that harmful teachings bore in our marriage.
But, we are glad to be able to recommend this book for anyone, but especially the guys.
The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex: Because Good Guys Make the Best Lovers
There is an equally excellent, helpful companion book for women.
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
The church has got so so so much wrong about sexuallity, purity and sex in marriage, it's done tremendous damage. See #thegreatsexrescue for more on that.
If you are looking to start off on healthy footing, or are looking to rebuild after tearing down the lies that were holding your marriage in bondage please, please pick up this book.
It's helped my husband and I so much as we are working through a lot of crap beliefs we were taught.
Not all the conversations are easy, there have been lots of tears, apologies, and mutual grief over the damage that harmful teachings bore in our marriage.
But, we are glad to be able to recommend this book for anyone, but especially the guys.
The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex: Because Good Guys Make the Best Lovers
There is an equally excellent, helpful companion book for women.
The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
March 12, 2022
I believe this book could easily be one of the most important books on this topic I have ever read. In the Gregoire’s style, it is no fluff or nonsense. I will admit, I did have to tear up in the first few chapters as I realized the extent of empathy and grace their message extends. This book is just as important for women to read, as it is for the men who want to love them well. Definitely recommend for conservative, fundamental or evangelical background readers that couldn’t settle for the trash mixed along in with the current prevalent messages, and want to find something refreshing, relevant to today, but deeply devoted to showing the words and heart of God toward sexual relationships.
The nuanced approach to heavier topics such as pornography, lust, libido and sexual response cycles, was appreciated. Keith's style of conversation in this book was awesome as well, and Keith and Sheila included plenty of anecdotes, some humour, and lots of graphics from their research, surveying Christian men.
Good book to read for engaged or soon to be married couples, and for the married as well, or well in fact any of those who would like to find a positive and helpful approach to understanding sexuality.
The nuanced approach to heavier topics such as pornography, lust, libido and sexual response cycles, was appreciated. Keith's style of conversation in this book was awesome as well, and Keith and Sheila included plenty of anecdotes, some humour, and lots of graphics from their research, surveying Christian men.
Good book to read for engaged or soon to be married couples, and for the married as well, or well in fact any of those who would like to find a positive and helpful approach to understanding sexuality.
March 15, 2022
My husband and I got this book and it’s companion “girls guide” to enrich our marriage together. What a wealth of wisdom and insight. The focus on the arousal cycle and the importance of mindset early on was very practical advice, and the illustration on page 52 was very helpful. But the major win in this book, for us, was how much detail there was on the different mental experiences between the guys and girls and how that impacts the way our intimacy plays out. How we can be in the exact same situation together, and can mentally be miles apart, and how to get on the same page. Highly recommend for any couple that wants to “deeply know and be known” with their spouse.
March 15, 2022
(This review is written by my husband, who is not on Goodreads)
I WISH my wife and I had read this book during our premarital counseling! This book is outstanding, well written and organized, backed by tons of research and hard work. Few men would not benefit from reading this book, I highly recommend it. Even though couples who have been married for years would benefit from this book, I would also highly recommend it for couples interested premarital counseling. I think many counselors and couples are going to benefit for years to come from this publication. Outstanding!
I WISH my wife and I had read this book during our premarital counseling! This book is outstanding, well written and organized, backed by tons of research and hard work. Few men would not benefit from reading this book, I highly recommend it. Even though couples who have been married for years would benefit from this book, I would also highly recommend it for couples interested premarital counseling. I think many counselors and couples are going to benefit for years to come from this publication. Outstanding!
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