The Mutant Strain

Kissing the Coronavirus #3

by M.J. Edwards

Dr Amy Amyson is North Virginia’s top microbiologist, but after a recent trip to Finland, she finds herself a potential carrier for a terrible new Covid-19 variant which is reportedly resistant to vaccines.

And if things couldn’t get any worse for Dr Amyson, it’s also been a long time since she’s had the sort of knee-knocking orgasm she is has come to expect from the sexually charged world of microbiology.

But then, things DO start to get worse for Dr Amyson, and she’s about to find out just how big of a risk a quick fling can be in a world ravaged by Covid...Kissing the Coronavirus 3: The Mutant Strain is the final installment in the Kissing the Coronavirus series, much to many peoples relief.

Genres: Romance, LGBT, Science Fiction, Erotica, Smut, Fiction, Contemporary

30 pages, Paperback

First published April 13, 2021

Reviews

[Cait Jacobs (Caitsbooks) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will never know peace.

The iconic Kissing the Coronavirus series is back with a third installment: The Mutant Strain.

And yes, I read it.

In fact, if you get a physical copy... you might notice a quote from someone on the back...

Okay, but before I share with you the quotes from this book that I will unfortunately never be able to get out of my head, let me give you some context:

Kissing the Coronavirus 3: The Mutant Strain follows Amy Amyson (a great name, by the way). She's a microbiologist who realizes that she's carrying a new strain of the coronavirus. If you are familiar with the lore of the Kissing the Coronavirus universe, then you might be able to guess what this new strain will do to our protagonist (I won't go into details, because spoilers).

Also, I would like to point out that the name of the new strain? The D1K strain. But that's not the only new strain mentioned in the book. We also have the VG1NA strain.

Now, what you're actually here for, the quotes!

"...was permanently lodged in her temporal lobe, which is the part of the brain that stores your memories..."

I didn't come here to learn but thank you M. J. Edwards for the science lesson. We love to learning things while reading our coronavirus erotica.

"Just the thought of it sent her vagina spinning like a thing that spins a lot."

ah, yes, the beautiful prose we all know and love

"It was like a sunburnt sea lion fresh out of the ocean. Even her positive Covid-19 test couldn't dampen her sexual spirits."

I don't even know where to start

"The sheer memory was enough to send an orgasm rippling through her body like her vagina had been filled with bees."

NOT THE BEES

"She was happy with a dick clumsily fucking her soapy tits like an eager boy scout cleaning a car windscreen with a slab of chorizo, a vagina rubbing gently against her forearm like a chewed beefburger."

I'm glad we get horrifying metaphors for multiple genders here

"... an immeasurable amount of genitalia hitting, tickling or gouging you in any one of your five orifices, which were what microbiologists like Dr Amyson called holes."

M. J. Edwards loves having women in STEM protagonists, and we really appreciate the commitment to detail here with the terminology

"If she had false teeth, she'd be good at licking her pussy like a dog licking the filling out of an Oreo..."

I'm never having oreos again

"She was already on her third rewatch of Big Momma's House 2"

Okay, I know this isn't an emotionally scarring line, like some of the others, but I think it's very important for you to know that Big Momma's House 2 is our protagonist's favorite movie. Because it's mentioned. A lot.

"She felt a tingle in her vagina, like she had just dipped it in vinegar."

I'm sorry, she what

"Her nipples poked through the air hostess blouse like she had brought in two extra peanuts, which Dr. Amyson couldn't wait to masticate."

I would just like to point out that the smutty scenes (yes. plural) in this book are between 2 women, so thank you M. J. Edwards for this incredible LGBTQ+ representation.
Gonna include this in all my sapphic book recs from now on

"the air hostess dove vagina-first towards Dr Amyson"

just... how????

"She buried her face between her titties, which were big and soft like ripened wheels of cheese."

I have to say, this is the least emotionally damaging food metaphor in this book

"Dr Amyson clung to the wall like a gecko"

I don't know why this mental image brought me as much joy as it did

"her own tongue was now comparable to a hairless ferret, snaking its way down the intern's throat"

I want to cry

"Except it wasn't an earthquake. It was a pleasurequake."

please no

"The floor was sodden with juices that had been expelled from their two bodies, from every which orifice (hole) the two of them had."

thanks for the clarification there. i'm going to throw up


Those are all the quotes I'll be sharing with you, partially because I want to save some for you to discover yourself, but also because I don't think I can physically type any more.

After each installment in this series, I tell myself it can't get any worse. And each time, I'm proven wrong.

That said, this series has been the only reliable thing during this pandemic, so that must mean something.

On that note, please remember to wear a mask, social distance, and get vaccinated if you can!

[Phuong ✯ · Rating 1 out of 5]

Welcome back to episode three (and hopefully last one) of Kissing the Coronavirus or how I'd like to call it: After more than a year a pandemic is still raging, the economy is in ruins, but love is love.

First of all, I'd like to thank my crack queen M.J. Edwards for writing another beautiful love story that was written in the stars and has branded itself so deep into my soul. Not only can she write M/F, M/F/M love stories, but also F/F. Is there anything this woman can't do? I don't think so.

They say the new strain is resistant to vaccines, but is it resistant to sex?

｡･ﾟﾟ PLOT ･ﾟﾟ･｡

Dr Amy Amyson is having a flashback of the annual microbiology convention where she discusses the latest microbiological breakthroughs centred around the Coronavirus pandemic with collegues from all over the world, but in reality it's just one big sex orgy.

She was happy with a dick clumsily fucking her soapy tits like an eager boy scout cleaning a car windscreen with a slab of chorizo, a vagina rubbing gently against her forearm like a chewed beefburger, or anything in between. She just loved genitals. She lvoed touching genitals, kissing genitals, and putting things inside her own–and of course other peopel's–genitals.

Of course these brilliant scientist didn't just have sex, they also worked really hard and made a new discovery: the D1K strain, also known as the dick strain. It was resistant to vaccines and sat dormat in the system for twelve hours before releasing the infection into the cells.

On her flight back to North Virginia, our dear Dr Amy Amyson has a one night stand with the air hostess. This is her reaction when Amy sees her

She felt a tingle in her vagina, like she had just dipped it in vinegar.

Ohh I forgot to mentioned that the hostess is French is speaking like this

"I can 'elp you wiz zat,' she said, slowly licking her lip like she'd just devoured a chicken wing.

Uhm?? Okay??? I feel lowkey offended for the French people here.

After "the French vixen was Frenching her pussy, her tongue lapping at her vertical lips like it was an ice pop melting on a hot summer's day" Dr Amy gets a text that said: Your Covid test results are in–positive. Please maintain social distancing. Goodbye.

Once she is back, she goes directly to her lab to find out if she has the D1K strain. But when she tested herself for the dick strain, she gets a negative result.

TWIST. It's even worse than she thought. The result said: New variant found: VG1NA.
Another new variant and Dr Amyson is patient number one!!!!



As the upstanding she is, she had to notify the hostess asap

Hello, my beautiful,
Thank you for that wonderful sex today, however I come bearing news.
Please self-isolate. I have been found to be carrying a brand-new variant of the Coronavirus known as: VG1NA.
Please tell your local authorities.
I'm sorry, my princess.
Dr Amyson x

The hostess reply

Mon cherry,
Wee, I ave also been diagnosed wiz ze Coronavirus.
I haz ze dick strain.
All my love.
Air hostess.

And then

her vagina twinged like she'd been stung by a lustful scorpion. Her breasts thundered together like boulders clashing under a crescent moon. Her bottom puckered and a ripple of intense pain and pleasure echoed throughout her body in a cataclysm of erogenous persuasion she couldn't even desribe.

What does every normal human do when something like that happens? Exactly. She ran and ran.

The dick strain and the vagina strain are merging inside Dr Amyson's body and changing her human form into something different.

Dr Amy Amyson is now
- red
- Has protein spikes
- Boobies are big af

But her vagina is where the magic happens

Oh her vagina. It was lean and muscular, like a thicc slab of freshly butchered, high-quality meat hanging in an abattoir window. It oozed pleasure fluid, which the sexy intern couldn't resist. She dropped to her knees and began slurping at it like she'd been shipwrecked on an island for weeks and Dr Amyson's vagina was a delicious glass of Pepsi.

And Dr Amyson and the intern get it on. The end.

While this book overall is still a masterpiece, I still have to say that from this trilogy it's my least favorite, but ofc it's hard after Kissing the Coronavirus to write anything close to that ✨perfection✨.

NOW PLS LET MY BRAIN CELLS REST IN PEACE!!!

KISSING THE CORONAVIRUS SERIES
#1 Kissing the Coronavirus – Infinity stars
#2 The Second Wave – 1.5 stars
#3 The Mutant Strain – 1.25 stars

[Mrinmayi]

Guys, take a look!!! MY MOST ANTICIPATED BOOK OF THE YEAR HAS ARRIVED!!!


Mrin to this series:

To be honest, this series will haunt me and live on in my memory for the rest of my life.


It's an underappreciated sci-fi series that deserves to be recognised.


I mean, it literally CHANGED THE ENTIRE GENRE!!!


Who cares if my country is under lockdown???!!

What we all need is a ray of hope, which this masterpiece series provides.
I'm sure we were all hoping for more virus smut!!!!


I mean, the author is always up to date on everything!! NEITHER VIRUS NOR VACCINE....
This time, we're dealing with THE MUTANT STRAIN!!!


Now, as many of you are aware, I am an AWESOME friend.

Enough with the compliments, guys.


Hmmmm...let's get back to the review.
So...being the good friend that I am...
This is something I've decided to BR with my best friend.

They are new to the book world and are unaware that this exceptional series exists.


Mrin to her best friend:


Will the two of us still be friends after this BR??!

Will they forgive me for subjecting them to this?


BUT THAT IS THE MAGIC OF THIS SERIES...
You are willing to take any risk.


(They gonna hate me rt👀🥺)

[Jamie · Rating 2 out of 5]

***NSFW Warning: This review is, well, not safe for work. It's also not for the extremely prudish – lots and lots of use of the word “vagina” forthcoming.***

Seriously, M.J. Edwards could be the next Shakespeare, as her command of the English language is truly masterful. I, for one, am looking forward to her future bestsellers, Much Ado About COVID-19 and The Taming of the Coronavirus.

This next installment of The Coronavirus Chronicles follows Dr. Amy Amyson, a microbiologist who seems a little confused about the difference between microbiology and anatomy. Dr. Amy is on her way home from a sex-fueled microbiology conference in Finland when things get hot and heavy with a French flight attendant. But, oh, no! Dr. Amy is COVID-positive! And so is the flight attendant! What ever will happen when they mix their two different strains of the coronavirus, the D1K and VG1NA variants?!

So, first of all, I don't like to body shame other women so this is not me being judgy or anything, but I'm not sure that Dr. Amy has a normal vagina. “The sheer memory was enough to send an orgasm rippling through her body like her vagina had been filled with bees.” I mean, you do you and all, Dr. Amy, but as a human of the female variety, that is one comparison that I hope I'm never in a position to be able to make. This is equally true for when “her vagina twinged like she'd been stung by a lustful scorpion,” or when “she felt a tingle in her vagina, like she had just dipped it in vinegar.” Or how about that time that “an orgasm slammed Dr. Amyson in the ovaries like she'd been shot at with a machine gun?”

Come to think of it, Dr. Amy might just be a masochist.

But there's also so much more to Dr. Amy than just her poor abused vagina. She's also very open-minded and family-oriented. “They rubbed their vaginas together and moaned and it felt incredible, even better than that time she watched porn with her ex-mother-in-law.” While this isn't necessarily an activity I'd choose to participate in with my husband's mother, it's nice that they enjoyed doing stuff together.

And in case you were worried about this book having a one-dimensional plot, never fear! This story is not just about sex and Dr. Amy's vagina. It is also very, very science-y. There are famous microbiologists who presumably do important microbiology things, “including Professor Theon Wallbreaker, Denmark's leading micro-biomedical researcher (who she sucked off in a storage cupboard …) and Sir Rogerson Tilbert (who she tried to suck off but he is very old so he couldn't become engorged …).” There are interns doing very important scientific work (on Dr. Amy's “pink surprise,” anyway). There are new vocabulary words to learn, like “orifices, which were what microbiologists like Dr. Amyson called holes.” I mean, it is truly a groundbreaking and incredibly deep piece of scientific literature.

My overall rating: one star for the plot line and one star for the phrase “like an eager boy scout cleaning a car windscreen with a slab of chorizo."

[human]

damn, even a masterpiece like this one must come to an end, huh? mj edwards, your series will always hold a special place in my heart. i wasn't living until i heard about these books, and now that it's complete, i've died with it 😔😔

...

not sure whether i should be relieved that it's over, or sad that i won't be able to read more ranty reactions.

[Matilda · Rating 1 out of 5]

-5 stars 🦠

I’m both happy and sad to say this is my first F/F ever. I wouldn’t have give this honor to any other author. M.J. Edwards created something so horrible, so disgusting, but so fucking hilarious.

This author's ability to make me more uncomfortable in a 16 page novella than anything else I’ve ever read is a true talent. She really aims for the moon 🚀

All you need to know, context wise, is that the heroine’s name is Amy Amyson (no that’s not a typo) and that’s she’s probably an undiagnosed sex addict. This woman thinks of nothing else, just sex. Literally the first sentence of the novella-

Dr Amy Amyson couldn’t stop thinking about the incredible sex she’d partaken in not twelve hours before.

We flashback 12 hours and Dr. Amyson, a microbiologist, is on her way back from the annual microbiology convention, where it seems no one actually exchanges or talks about COVID-19. It’s apparently just a place where microbiologists hook up whilst ignoring the fact that people are dying in a global pandemic 😁

She had spent three whole days discussing the latest microbiological breakthroughs centred around the Coronavirus pandemic (there were several) with colleagues from all across the world, including Professor Theon Wallbreaker…(who she sucked off in a storage cupboard…and Sir Rogerson Tilbert (who she tried to suck off but he is very old so he couldn’t become engorged…)

While on the plane, Dr. Amyson, who’s basically a cat in heat, hooks with the hot female flight attendant in the bathroom-

She pulled Dr Amyson up with such animalistic, lusty ferocity that she sat on the back of the toilet, at perfect height for Dr Amyson’s knockers to be suckled like a vacuum cleaner on the highest setting.

→VACUUM CLEANER ✋🏻✋🏻✋🏻

Let me just bring up the fact that the flight attendants email is bustyfrenchbeauty69@gmail.com

After all that happens, Dr. Amyson finds how she is positive for COVID which freaks her out since she just hooked up with the flight attendant. Interestingly enough, she doesn’t tell the flight attendant she was diagnosed with COVID because that's totally okay!

We flashback forward to present time where Dr. Amyson is back in her lab and now testing herself to see if she has the new, deadly COVID-19 strain called ‘dick’. Yes, dick. Well she doesn’t have dick, luckily enough…she actually has VG1NA!



Dr. Amyson just found out that she is actually patient number 0 of the new VG1NA variant. So nice of the testing machine to already have a name picked out for the variant 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

She NOW decides to email the flight attendant and tell her she tested positive, well in a turn of events, the flight attendant tested positive for COVID as well...BUT, for the dick variant 😱

All the sudden, Dr. Amyson starts feeling sick and runs out of the lab, only to run into the hot intern where Dr. Amyson begins to mutate into this DICK-VG1NA variant (I'm calling it D1NA)

The intern screamed a terrified scream as Dr Amyson’s skin transformed into a deep, crimson shade of red. Tiny bumps grew from her skin—which Dr Amyson instantly recognised as protein spikes—she had never seen them so clearly before. So closely. So… sexy...
Her lab top burst open, her boobies now so big, so red, that just glancing at them was like staring into the centre of the sun. It was a glorious, yet intoxicating sight...

→'boobies'

The intern has been out under some kind of spell which makes her want to fuck Dr. Amyson-

They rubbed their vaginas together and moaned and it felt incredible, even better than the time she watched porn with her ex-mother-in-law.

→I love how it's the idea of her watching porn with her ex-mother-in-law that paused me for a moment 💀

Anyway, after the intern and Dr. Amyson fuck, they high-five (literally) and Dr. Amyson walks out of the lab to do the exact opposite of what her job is supposed to be 😃👍🏻

That’s the story folks. I mean do you see what I mean, a masterpiece.

The way certain things are described are just so fucking random?? Like really how would one come up with these things-

a)

But her vagina. Oh, her vagina.
It was lean and muscular, like a thicc slab of freshly butchered, high-quality meat hanging in an abattoir window.

b)

She was happy with a dick clumsily fucking her soapy tits like an eager boy scout cleaning a car windscreen with a slab of chorizo, a vagina rubbing gently against her forearm like a chewed beefburger, or anything in between

→THIS AUTHOR LOVES DESCRIBING DICKS AND PUSSY LIPS LIKE THEY’RE MEAT

Sad to see this trilogy come to an end 😢

Kissing the Coronavirus
•1: Kissing the Coronavirus — 1.5 stars
•2: The Second Wave — 1 star
•3: The Mutant Strain — -5 stars

[dee (andie) 🕺🏼✨ · Rating 1 out of 5]

M.J. IS OUT HERE GIVING US THE LGBTQ REPRESENTATION THAT WE NEED. 😩💯

I would also like to point out that this book was dedicated to one of m.j.'s ferrets and the acknowledgements said, and I quote: The Mutant Strain came to her [the author] in a fever dream after accidentally dropping some of her ferret's worm medication in her glass of rosé.

[♠ TABI⁷ ♠]

"the final installment in the Kissing the Coronavirus series, much to many peoples relief"
ngl though this series kept me entertained enough by reading people's reactions to it

but why does this one look good
we all know bc it's gay that's why

[☆Pelumi☆]

Lmaoooo
We love to see it...
MJ Edward's is doing her thing and we just have to stan her for it.
She seems to like the one star ratings so why stop?

Thanks for the recommendation Tabi😭😭😂😂😂

EDIT: I just realised its gay

Now I have to read it😒

[Marc *Dark Reader with a Thousand Young! Iä!* · Rating 4 out of 5]

That's right . . . it's back. And it's deadlier than ever. Can even lesbian genital-mashing stop the virus now?

This third and final outing (yes, final*, she said so!) came to the now-divorced-and-looking-for-love-or-whatever-it-is-you-can-find-on-Tinder author

in a fever dream after accidentally dropping some of her ferret's worm medication in her glass of rose

which explains a lot. Our new protagonist, Dr Amy Amyson, "her breasts quaking due to mild turbulence" as she flies commercial from Finland to North Virginia, has an in-flight experience that will literally change her, and the course of the pandemic, forever.

Sadly, it's not as good as the prior stories; I feel like the author has started phoning it in. Many of the similes and metaphors lack inspiration. Some gags are recycled; she already used "West Dakota" in an earlier story, so North Virginia loses its luster. It relies too many times on word repetition and on Big Momma's House 2 for effective comedy. The story languishes for the its first two thirds before gaining any electricity.

There are still a few of the joyously off-putting anerotic comparisons that we have come to love and fail to wrap our heads around. My favorites:

. . . so wet it was like a sunburnt sea lion fresh out of the ocean.
. . .
She was happy with a dick clumsily fucking her soapy tits like an eager boy scout cleaning a car windscreen with a slab of chorizo,
. . .
Her breasts thundered together like boulders clashing under a crescent moon.

One of the joys of Edwards' books has been the ability to follow her recent life drama through the window of her author's notes and the occasional seemingly auto-biographical detail inserted into her stories. I sincerely hope that this is not one of the latter:

They rubbed their vaginas together and moaned and it felt incredible, even better than the time she watched porn with her ex-mother-in-law.

I honestly don't know where you go from that.


*final if you don't count Kissing the Coronovirus: The Legend of Dr Ashingtonford available only in the collected Kissing the Coronavirus Chronicles.

[cossette]

mistakes were made anyways i guess there are no more ferrets???? there were no updates in this one

[Lucy O’Toole · Rating 5 out of 5]

All good things must come to an end. And what an ending it was. How does one describe the exquisite writing, vivid description, character development, and perfect LGBTQ+ representation to be found in this masterpiece?

MJ Edwards is going places. Maybe not the microbiologist’s convention , but places all the same.

[Sofie]

smut queen MJ Edwards finally writes a w|w coronavirus erotica

[dorian ♕ ♕]

I CANT BREAWTH ITS A TRILOGY

[Anniek · Rating 1 out of 5]

Can this author teach classes about similes because these were the funniest ones I've read

[Matteo Fumagalli · Rating 1 out of 5]

Videorecensione: https://youtu.be/SP3eFwYy6Ds

[sunaina · Rating 1 out of 5]

wiping my eyes because the tears won't stop flowing

[Era ➴]

[roma]

i'm thinking about fem coded coronavirus. also i hope her ferrets are healthy much love<3

[Lulu · Rating 2 out of 5]

added an extra star because it was sapphic

[Ana · Rating 1 out of 5]

well

[Ayesha (Seokjin's Version) ☾ · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am telling you guys she is an ally.

Someone needs to check on Chuck, does he know that this book is dedicated to him?

[farith]

she’s coming for our wigs y’all.

[Hershey · Rating 1 out of 5]

what the actual fuck

I'll never look at oreos and bees and vinegar the same way again

"They say the new strain is resistant to vaccines, but is it resistant to sex?"

"The sheer memory was enough to send an orgasm rippling through her body like her vagina had been filled with bees"

"...she'd be good at licking her pussy like a dog licking the filling out of an Oreo..."

"She felt a tingle in her vagina, like she had just dipped it in vinegar."

🥲

So the tips are now 'soapy tits' instead of the tic tacs

[Aaron Morrsi · Rating 1 out of 5]

Beautiful basically a masterpiece

[Aleksandar Janjic · Rating 4 out of 5]

Једва да је прошло неколико недеља откако сам читао други дио ове занимљиве саге, а ревносна списатељица М. Ј. Едвардс је већ избацила и трећи, о чему ме је Амазон благовремено информисао, на чему сам им захвалан. Прва књига је била одлична, друга нешто слабија, а сада са задовољством могу да констатујем да је серијал доживио својеврсни bounce back.

Трећи дио серијала поново уводи нову главну јунакињу - овог пута то је др Ејми Ејмисон, микробиолог (шта се десило са др Асхингтонфорд и др Цаулдрон можемо само да нагађамо, можда буде објашњено у неком наредном наставку). Након конференције микробиолога у Финској и редовних оргија које том приликом наступају, као и након секса са стјуардесом у авиону из Финске за Сјеверну Вирџинију (!), др Ејмисон на своје запрепашћење открива да је заражена истовремено са ДВА нова соја коронавируса - D1K и VG1NA. Очекивано, два соја унутар њеног тијела се комбинују и доводе до трансформације сличне оној из првог наставка.

Мото ове "књиге" је "They say the new strain is resistant to vaccines, but is it resistant to sex?", a

"The sheer memory was enough to send an orgasm rippling through her body like her vagina had been filled with bees."

"Sure, she had been throat-punched by two of the biggest names (even if they weren't the biggest, she thought with a chuckling chuckle) but overall, the convention hadn't been as fruitful as it had been years before."

"NO, Dr Amyson yelled at herself in her head. She couldn't think about the intern's incredible boobs yet; she had to figure out if she was carrying the dick strain of COVID-19!"

"Dr Amyson swabbed the back of her throat with a swab, then swabbed the swab up her nose, before placing the swab in the swab reader on the COVID-19 machine."

и

"The floor was sodden with juices that had been expelled from their two bodies, from every which orifice (hole) the two of them had."

су само неки од "пробраних" цитата на основу којих ћете без већих проблема процијенити да ли је ово књига за вас и да ли вриједи жртвовати једну фунту за њу.

[Lynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am devastated that this gem of a series has come to an end but thank you MJ Edwards for entertaining us througout this pandemic with your genius writing.

[Natasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

I hope M. J. Edwards never stops writing these

The writing is terrible but it will never not make me laugh. I love it

Carry on, please write more

[andy | أندي · Rating 5 out of 5]

every time i reread this i am both dying of laughter and embarrassment

[Kiera · Rating 2 out of 5]

tbh this series was better than mating w the mantis