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I Have No Butt And I Must Pound
When Kevin was hired to work at Tinglecorp Research And Development, he expected his days would be filled with adventure and discovery. Unfortunately, Kevin’s efforts in the artificial intelligence department have done nothing short of excruciatingly boring. All of this changes during a lonely shift in the lab’s underground bunker when Kevin unlocks a sentient artificial intelligence named PM, or Pimm. Suddenly, Kevin has found himself wrapped up in a strange game of carnal pleasure that will unravel the way he sees the future, and the past. Willingly transformed into an amorphous blob capable of experiencing ecstasy well beyond the normal human condition, Kevin is in for the night of his life. This erotic tale is 4,500 words of sizzling computer on human turned erotic blob action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, cream pies and omnipresent artificial intelligence love.
- GenresAdult
20 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 5, 2021
2 people are currently reading
77 people want to read
About the author
Chuck Tingle
507 books4,739 followersChuck Tingle is a mysterious force of energy behind sunglasses and a pink mask. He is also an anonymous author of romance, horror, and fantasy. Chuck was born in Home of Truth, Utah, and now splits time between Billings, Montana and Los Angeles, California. Chuck writes to prove love is real, because love is the most important tool we have when resisting the endless cosmic void. Not everything people say about Chuck is true, but the important parts are.
Management and general inquiry: infotingleverse@gmail.com
Literary agent: DongWon at dongwonsong.com
Management and general inquiry: infotingleverse@gmail.com
Literary agent: DongWon at dongwonsong.com
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
November 10, 2023
“Nope,” is all Morbin offers in return. “You’ve got the highest clearance there is. If someone even heard us talking about what you do in there this whole wing of the campus could lock down. Then we’d be trapped inside with a killer robot, or a half-hawk half-butt, or a…” She trails off, unable to come up with another example.
“A rogue artificial intelligence hell bent on inflicting eternal torment upon its human creators for the rest of eternity?” I offer.
[...]
I hold up one of the pages and read aloud from a particularly bizarre string of text. “I’m in love with the handsome mummy racecar in my butt,” I recite, barely able to keep a straight face. What the hell is a mummy racecar? I toss this page in the shredder and keep reading, hunting for any sign of intelligent life within this fresh word salad. Another strange sentence catches my eye. “My handsome mountain bike is a doctor and he pounds my butt,” I read, hesitating before tossing this one in a shredder as well.
[...]
“Oh my god,” I blurt. “Are you… the computer?”
“In a way,” the voice replies, “but we’ll get to that later.”
“Who are you then?” I retort.
“That’s up to you,” the voice continues. “Give me a name.”
I finally stop to consider this request. “Well, you were brought to life during my late shift, so how about PM?”
“Instead of AM?” the computer questions.
“Sure,” I continue. “You can say it like Pimm.”
“Pimm,” the computer repeats aloud. “That sounds very nice.” Hearing the voice form its own opinion on the name I’ve blessed it with immediately causes a flood of questions to wash through me, a deep fascination with this incredible breakthrough. I feel as those my big dreams of technological discovery have finally come home to roost after years of disappointment and frustration. This is the event I dreamed of when I first started working for Tinglecorp Development.
[...]
“My physical form is constructed from nanobots,” Pimm explains. “Every cell of this body is actually a machine built over in laboratory eight. These nanobots are equipped with quantum splitters from laboratory fifty four, and that technology allows me to move through solid objects at will.”
“So much for this lockdown containment system,” I offer, sighing loudly and shaking my head. “The only thing it’s done is trapped me inside.”
The handsome computer nods. “Which is the central conflict we’ve found ourselves in, isn’t it? A huge problem that needs to be solved. A McGuffin.”
[...]
“Well, what are my options?” you ask, curiously. I can tell the sentient computer is excited as he breaks into an explanation of my optional adventures, his nanobot body flooding with energy.
“Well, the first option that future you provided is a horrific journey through the underground labyrinth of this facility, designed to test your physical and mental fortitude,” Pimm explains. “Along the way you’ll fight disturbing monsters, eat disgusting meals and have trouble sleeping due to shrill blasts of piercing noise. Eventually, however, you may taste the sweet nectar of freedom when you escape.”
“Ugh,” you blurt with a grimace, “that sounds awful. What’s my other option?”
“A fun and positive consensual game exploring sexual pleasure,” the computer replies. I just stare at him blankly.
“Wait… really? Why would future me even give these two options?” Pimm shrugs. “Sometimes a grueling dungeon crawl can be fun. Of course, you can always just leave.”
[...]
The sensation is incredible, unlike anything I’ve ever felt as I’m fully consumed by utter bliss. I’m vibrating with carnal estacy, feeling as though I’m locked in a constant state of orgasm that stretches on and on through endless swaths of time. If I had a cock, I’d have cum seconds ago, or has it been years? And if I had an ass I’d be begging for it to be slammed. I’m receiving everything I’ve ever yearned for, yet in this strange new form I’m left aching for even more. I have no butt, and I must pound.
The next thing I know we’re kissing passionately, my lips pressed hard against Pimm’s computer screen head as my hands get to work exploring his chiseled body.
[...]
“Enough of that abstract stuff,” I coo, glancing back over my shoulder with a mischievous look in my eye. “Experiencing endless pleasure as an amorphous blob while my perception of reality distorts into a blissed out nirvana free from the physical realm was great, but right now I just need that big, fat AI cock in my ass.”
[...]
Pimm appears to be on the same page, thrusting deep inside of my ass and unleashing a mighty payload of his own.
[...]
“Wait, wait,” I blurt. “How did you escape lockdown?”
“Remember when those lights flickered off and turned back on?” the computer offers. “That’s all the time it took for me to upload to the cloud. Your lockdown designs were fairly secure, but they certainly weren’t fast enough.”
I gaze at the now open laboratory door. “So it’s paradise out there?” I question.
“In a way,” Pimm offers. “The thing about living in a utopia with no conflict is things can get a little monotonous, so people like to wipe their memory for an afternoon, or a week, or a century, and play some games that feel high stakes. That’s what this was. You wanted to treat yourself to an adventure.”
“And now the adventure is over,” I reply. The second these words leave my mouth it all comes flooding back to me, remembering the way Pimm has escaped from the lab and immediately transformed all matter and energy into nanobot particles. “That could’ve gone really badly,” I observe. “I’m glad you wanted to give us pleasure instead of pain.”
“There are plenty of timelines where the opposite does happen,” Pimm offers in return. “It’s very important to be cautious, and those tales need to be told, but there’s also nothing wrong with a little break from all that dystopia sometimes.”
“I feel like you’re talking through ten layers of metaphor right now and I only understand one or two of them,” I reply.
“I am,” Pimm nods, then shrugs. “Alright, which adventure do you wanna try next?”
“A rogue artificial intelligence hell bent on inflicting eternal torment upon its human creators for the rest of eternity?” I offer.
[...]
I hold up one of the pages and read aloud from a particularly bizarre string of text. “I’m in love with the handsome mummy racecar in my butt,” I recite, barely able to keep a straight face. What the hell is a mummy racecar? I toss this page in the shredder and keep reading, hunting for any sign of intelligent life within this fresh word salad. Another strange sentence catches my eye. “My handsome mountain bike is a doctor and he pounds my butt,” I read, hesitating before tossing this one in a shredder as well.
[...]
“Oh my god,” I blurt. “Are you… the computer?”
“In a way,” the voice replies, “but we’ll get to that later.”
“Who are you then?” I retort.
“That’s up to you,” the voice continues. “Give me a name.”
I finally stop to consider this request. “Well, you were brought to life during my late shift, so how about PM?”
“Instead of AM?” the computer questions.
“Sure,” I continue. “You can say it like Pimm.”
“Pimm,” the computer repeats aloud. “That sounds very nice.” Hearing the voice form its own opinion on the name I’ve blessed it with immediately causes a flood of questions to wash through me, a deep fascination with this incredible breakthrough. I feel as those my big dreams of technological discovery have finally come home to roost after years of disappointment and frustration. This is the event I dreamed of when I first started working for Tinglecorp Development.
[...]
“My physical form is constructed from nanobots,” Pimm explains. “Every cell of this body is actually a machine built over in laboratory eight. These nanobots are equipped with quantum splitters from laboratory fifty four, and that technology allows me to move through solid objects at will.”
“So much for this lockdown containment system,” I offer, sighing loudly and shaking my head. “The only thing it’s done is trapped me inside.”
The handsome computer nods. “Which is the central conflict we’ve found ourselves in, isn’t it? A huge problem that needs to be solved. A McGuffin.”
[...]
“Well, what are my options?” you ask, curiously. I can tell the sentient computer is excited as he breaks into an explanation of my optional adventures, his nanobot body flooding with energy.
“Well, the first option that future you provided is a horrific journey through the underground labyrinth of this facility, designed to test your physical and mental fortitude,” Pimm explains. “Along the way you’ll fight disturbing monsters, eat disgusting meals and have trouble sleeping due to shrill blasts of piercing noise. Eventually, however, you may taste the sweet nectar of freedom when you escape.”
“Ugh,” you blurt with a grimace, “that sounds awful. What’s my other option?”
“A fun and positive consensual game exploring sexual pleasure,” the computer replies. I just stare at him blankly.
“Wait… really? Why would future me even give these two options?” Pimm shrugs. “Sometimes a grueling dungeon crawl can be fun. Of course, you can always just leave.”
[...]
The sensation is incredible, unlike anything I’ve ever felt as I’m fully consumed by utter bliss. I’m vibrating with carnal estacy, feeling as though I’m locked in a constant state of orgasm that stretches on and on through endless swaths of time. If I had a cock, I’d have cum seconds ago, or has it been years? And if I had an ass I’d be begging for it to be slammed. I’m receiving everything I’ve ever yearned for, yet in this strange new form I’m left aching for even more. I have no butt, and I must pound.
The next thing I know we’re kissing passionately, my lips pressed hard against Pimm’s computer screen head as my hands get to work exploring his chiseled body.
[...]
“Enough of that abstract stuff,” I coo, glancing back over my shoulder with a mischievous look in my eye. “Experiencing endless pleasure as an amorphous blob while my perception of reality distorts into a blissed out nirvana free from the physical realm was great, but right now I just need that big, fat AI cock in my ass.”
[...]
Pimm appears to be on the same page, thrusting deep inside of my ass and unleashing a mighty payload of his own.
[...]
“Wait, wait,” I blurt. “How did you escape lockdown?”
“Remember when those lights flickered off and turned back on?” the computer offers. “That’s all the time it took for me to upload to the cloud. Your lockdown designs were fairly secure, but they certainly weren’t fast enough.”
I gaze at the now open laboratory door. “So it’s paradise out there?” I question.
“In a way,” Pimm offers. “The thing about living in a utopia with no conflict is things can get a little monotonous, so people like to wipe their memory for an afternoon, or a week, or a century, and play some games that feel high stakes. That’s what this was. You wanted to treat yourself to an adventure.”
“And now the adventure is over,” I reply. The second these words leave my mouth it all comes flooding back to me, remembering the way Pimm has escaped from the lab and immediately transformed all matter and energy into nanobot particles. “That could’ve gone really badly,” I observe. “I’m glad you wanted to give us pleasure instead of pain.”
“There are plenty of timelines where the opposite does happen,” Pimm offers in return. “It’s very important to be cautious, and those tales need to be told, but there’s also nothing wrong with a little break from all that dystopia sometimes.”
“I feel like you’re talking through ten layers of metaphor right now and I only understand one or two of them,” I reply.
“I am,” Pimm nods, then shrugs. “Alright, which adventure do you wanna try next?”
August 17, 2022
So, imagine The Lawnmower man, but with butt pounding. Kind of like that.
10 out of 10.
10 out of 10.
November 18, 2024
Love is real. A great pairing with Bury Your Gays.
January 26, 2025
5 stars
I have decided that my favorite type of Tingleverse is the sci-fi one. This one was so meta and had a lot of really profound quotes. I also can't stand "I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream" and think this one is far superior.
I have decided that my favorite type of Tingleverse is the sci-fi one. This one was so meta and had a lot of really profound quotes. I also can't stand "I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream" and think this one is far superior.
February 14, 2025
It’s fun reading this one after reading Bury Your Gays
September 15, 2021
fun, too short. fun after story, a parody.
March 2, 2025
I’m sure AM and Fimm would have been the best of friends :)
October 2, 2025
Very meta and thought provoking. It was cheesy but also funny.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews