I think this is the worst book I’ve ever read. No tension, lacked chemistry, cringe dialogue from all of the characters. I hated the main female character and was so embarrassed by everything about her. It took me so long to finish this book. I would read and then come to some scene that legit made me cringe and I’d have to take a break.
It was repetitive. The intimate scenes were uncomfortable and unrealistic. So many things felt so inappropriate, and not in some kind of exciting taboo way… inappropriate like “is this happening? Gross”. The best way I could describe this book is forced. Nothing was ever shown, you just learned about the characters through arbitrary side comments or thoughts from the narrator. And the narrator struggled with anxiety and body image issues. She was bullied all through high school, and oddly those same bullies are still bullying her today… she’s a 30 year old woman who’s parents died in a tragic accident and the same girl that bullied her in high school randomly shows up to try and continue to bully her throughout various scenes in the book, but mostly so we can see the narrator “stand up for herself” and “learn that she is worth it even at a whopping size 14”… and don’t you worry about what the narrator is wearing to work, to the bar, or on a date… she will describe the outfit for you in great detail every time. Because clothing is her armor against all the fat shaming she endured.
Next issue, why is everyone like oddly rooting for this 30 year old woman to have sex? Wait… 29 year old woman, kidding 28 year old woman… who has taught for like four years, no wait longer because that doesn’t add up mathematically so maybe like 6-8 years? Who cares she’s been teaching a while. And her and her friends have been friends for 10 years, wait they met when they were 15, so it’s been 15 years, but that can’t be because she’s not 30? Or wait, I mean she’s 28… whatever let’s stick with 15 years. She’s an English teacher, and math is hard. And her boyfriend is 33 or maybe 34, wait he’s 36… and that’s hot because of the age gap. Which is anywhere from 4-8 years depending on what chapter of the book you’re in.
Should I growl about how frustrating these details were? Maybe I can smirk about it and just move on…
This book is 289 pages.
50 pages of clit flicking
50 pages of outfit details
50 pages detailing her anxiety and how fat she is, yet her man can pick her up and make her orgasm against any surface!
50 pages of random classroom bullshit
89 pages of random facts about her dead parents and the pictures on her memory wall.
And as I’m reading the book that is just purely garbage made up ridiculous crinnngeee fantasy BS I wonder to myself, what am I doing here? Why am I involved in this freaking awkwardness at all? There is no place for me as a reader in this book. No place for my excitement, no laughs, no shock, no rooting for love or growth. I’m just there thinking wait… did the bartender just tell the main character he’s happy she fucked her boyfriend in the men’s bathroom at his bar and that she’s living a little finally?
Wait did her parent’s lawyer show up on her wedding day, 10 years since their death mind you… and give her a letter from her dead parents about how proud they are of her for getting married and left her a big fat check to start out in married life. What if she never got married, how would that check have worked?
And guess what… she’s one month pregnant on her wedding day and tells her new husband after they read the letter from her dead parents together…
Pregnant you say, because of all the sex, duh.