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The Alpha's Rejected Heir
Previously published as 'The Alpha's Rejected Heir'.
Rosalyn Parker has been verbally abused by her mother for years and ignored by her father. Her brother was the only person who treated her with kindness. But, on the night of her 18th birthday when she got rejected by her mate Ke'shaun Black the soon-to-be alpha of The Howling Moon Pack after he mated with her. That was the last push she needed to leave, but she would soon find out that she was pregnant with the alpha's heir...
17 years after leaving her pack and family behind, Rosalyn has made a life for herself and her son in Italy after joining pacchetto della luna del sangue (Blood Moon Pack). She had kept in contact with her brother seeing as he was the only person she considered family...Now she is faced with the horror of going back to the place that broke her after been invited to her brother's wedding.
Read to find out what happens when the alpha meets his rejected heir.
Rosalyn Parker has been verbally abused by her mother for years and ignored by her father. Her brother was the only person who treated her with kindness. But, on the night of her 18th birthday when she got rejected by her mate Ke'shaun Black the soon-to-be alpha of The Howling Moon Pack after he mated with her. That was the last push she needed to leave, but she would soon find out that she was pregnant with the alpha's heir...
17 years after leaving her pack and family behind, Rosalyn has made a life for herself and her son in Italy after joining pacchetto della luna del sangue (Blood Moon Pack). She had kept in contact with her brother seeing as he was the only person she considered family...Now she is faced with the horror of going back to the place that broke her after been invited to her brother's wedding.
Read to find out what happens when the alpha meets his rejected heir.
- GenresWerewolvesShapeshifters
258 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 8, 2021
317 people are currently reading
373 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 94 reviews
August 17, 2022
The Alpha's Rejected Heir
By Icon_Brat101
When Rosalyn discovers at the alpha heir's 18th birthday party they are mates Ke'shaun sleeps with her and then rejects her in the morning. Not wanting to stick around she runs off to Italy where she discovers she is pregnant and is taken in by another Alpha & Luna both whom treat her like a daughter.
When Rosalyn's brother is engaged to his mate they ask her to return to help out with the wedding. Bringing her overprotective son, Alessandro, brings forth issues and not only with Ke'shaun who is furious she kept his son from him.
It was a good story, but there was a lot of repeating of scenes from multiple points of view which was completely unnecessary. If they hadn't been included the book could've been a few hours shorter. I also don't understand what's with all the flashbacks. Most go back to earlier parts of the story that should have been shared when they happened not many chapters later. Some flashbacks were necessary to share later on, , but only a couple of them should have been flashbacks.
Ke'shaun is a daddy's little wuss. Never standing up for what's right. He just followed his daddy's orders even though Ke'shaun himself was now the pack alpha. Rosalyn is a woman to admire. She always does and says what's right and will kick anyone's ass who needs it including Ke'shaun's father/former alpha. Alessandro is just like his mother with the same sense of right/wrong and also gets physical with Ke'shaun's father after his repulsive behavior towards Rosalyn. Jermaine is a true gentleman and I loved him all the more for standing up to his dad and fighting for Rosalyn. Ke'shaun and Jermaine's father, Kevin... that man needed to be tortured in every way possible along with Rosalyn's mother. They are both evil incarnate.
In all honesty if it had not been for the constant copying and pasting of the end of each chapter as the beginning of the next new chapter I would have given it 5 stars. But going through hours of copying and pasting and saying it's in a new POV just ticked me off.
The book is mostly in Rosalyn and Alessandro's POV, but it's also in Ke'shaun's, Jermaine's, and other minor character's POV.
Triggers:
By Icon_Brat101
When Rosalyn discovers at the alpha heir's 18th birthday party they are mates Ke'shaun sleeps with her and then rejects her in the morning. Not wanting to stick around she runs off to Italy where she discovers she is pregnant and is taken in by another Alpha & Luna both whom treat her like a daughter.
When Rosalyn's brother is engaged to his mate they ask her to return to help out with the wedding. Bringing her overprotective son, Alessandro, brings forth issues and not only with Ke'shaun who is furious she kept his son from him.
It was a good story, but there was a lot of repeating of scenes from multiple points of view which was completely unnecessary. If they hadn't been included the book could've been a few hours shorter. I also don't understand what's with all the flashbacks. Most go back to earlier parts of the story that should have been shared when they happened not many chapters later. Some flashbacks were necessary to share later on, , but only a couple of them should have been flashbacks.
Ke'shaun is a daddy's little wuss. Never standing up for what's right. He just followed his daddy's orders even though Ke'shaun himself was now the pack alpha. Rosalyn is a woman to admire. She always does and says what's right and will kick anyone's ass who needs it including Ke'shaun's father/former alpha. Alessandro is just like his mother with the same sense of right/wrong and also gets physical with Ke'shaun's father after his repulsive behavior towards Rosalyn. Jermaine is a true gentleman and I loved him all the more for standing up to his dad and fighting for Rosalyn. Ke'shaun and Jermaine's father, Kevin... that man needed to be tortured in every way possible along with Rosalyn's mother. They are both evil incarnate.
In all honesty if it had not been for the constant copying and pasting of the end of each chapter as the beginning of the next new chapter I would have given it 5 stars. But going through hours of copying and pasting and saying it's in a new POV just ticked me off.
The book is mostly in Rosalyn and Alessandro's POV, but it's also in Ke'shaun's, Jermaine's, and other minor character's POV.
Triggers:
September 27, 2021
very confusing and I have no idea what I just read…
Honestly I have no Wired’s. This book started out ok it had potential. But then it did a 360 and all of a sudden out of the blue the son is an assassin experiment the mom can kick ass and trained her son to do it however all if a sudden she can’t get out of being kidnapped.
There are multiple times (like every other page) where the shifters rage and talk about going on a killing or sometimes actually doing it. Then there’s the one part where the mom is raped and honestly it just doesn’t go with the book. Towards the end I’m not sure if the author just ran out of things to write because the same “flashback” was written over and over and over and over again I honestly skipped it all together it was so repetitive.
The story feels like it’s 3 stories in one.. rejected mate… second chance mate and crazy ass assassin stories. The end like… can we really call that a cliff hanger? I guess we can but honestly I probably won’t grab the sequel to this book.
I think as an author you have great ideas but I don’t think they all belong in one book and I think polishing up and getting an editor is another key point. I did finish the book so I could give a full review thanks!
Honestly I have no Wired’s. This book started out ok it had potential. But then it did a 360 and all of a sudden out of the blue the son is an assassin experiment the mom can kick ass and trained her son to do it however all if a sudden she can’t get out of being kidnapped.
There are multiple times (like every other page) where the shifters rage and talk about going on a killing or sometimes actually doing it. Then there’s the one part where the mom is raped and honestly it just doesn’t go with the book. Towards the end I’m not sure if the author just ran out of things to write because the same “flashback” was written over and over and over and over again I honestly skipped it all together it was so repetitive.
The story feels like it’s 3 stories in one.. rejected mate… second chance mate and crazy ass assassin stories. The end like… can we really call that a cliff hanger? I guess we can but honestly I probably won’t grab the sequel to this book.
I think as an author you have great ideas but I don’t think they all belong in one book and I think polishing up and getting an editor is another key point. I did finish the book so I could give a full review thanks!
June 4, 2022
Worth reading
Loved the storyline and plot build up - the Characters were well written and likeable :)
Only had thing is that the entire books filled with typos some stupid like fell is Read of felt or whole sentences and paragraph that don't make sense, if There was a email address I would of contacted the author instead of here.
That was the only reason I have the book 3stars, fix the spelling s etc and it would of been five
Loved the storyline and plot build up - the Characters were well written and likeable :)
Only had thing is that the entire books filled with typos some stupid like fell is Read of felt or whole sentences and paragraph that don't make sense, if There was a email address I would of contacted the author instead of here.
That was the only reason I have the book 3stars, fix the spelling s etc and it would of been five
November 29, 2021
unexpected twists and turns but I loved it
Spoilers**
First off the reason it doesn’t get a full 5 stars is because of the lack of editing, grammar and spelling issues but that’s easy to fix. Other than that the trope of rejected mates with secret offspring usually follows the cliché of getting back with original mate who rejected the FML but NOPE!!! The author said screw you she’s getting the brother!! I honestly think this story could have some real potential. So dear author if you read this I’ve got a degree and a vast understanding on story building, and the fine tuning you need. If you are interested in revamping this story and continuing the series I am all for it and would be happy to help for free. Honestly, I really did enjoy this story and love the originality and different take on this trope!! Message me on Wattpad at marie_loves_llamas or through replying to this comment 😋
Spoilers**
First off the reason it doesn’t get a full 5 stars is because of the lack of editing, grammar and spelling issues but that’s easy to fix. Other than that the trope of rejected mates with secret offspring usually follows the cliché of getting back with original mate who rejected the FML but NOPE!!! The author said screw you she’s getting the brother!! I honestly think this story could have some real potential. So dear author if you read this I’ve got a degree and a vast understanding on story building, and the fine tuning you need. If you are interested in revamping this story and continuing the series I am all for it and would be happy to help for free. Honestly, I really did enjoy this story and love the originality and different take on this trope!! Message me on Wattpad at marie_loves_llamas or through replying to this comment 😋
January 29, 2022
not do it
Trigger warning
this book needs to be read with absolute caution.There is some serious editing issues. On the whole the writer has a good story but the execution needs a lot of work. There is a lot of expedition, not a lot of description in places and the writers attempt to go back and forth is very jarring (and sometimes bloody unnecessary). I was a fool and did not respect all the post previously and I read this book all of it.
To the writer you’ve got a good idea but you need to spend some time flushing it all out. this could’ve been two books and why do writers feel the need to use rape as a way of talking about trauma. There could be such great possibilities in this book but I think you were so much in a rush to get this book out that you miss the opportunity of making it really stand out. Please don’t write another one to this one because I’m a completeness and like a fucking madman I will bloody read it. don’t do me that way, I beg don’t write no more of this particular book. the next one take your time and getting an editor.
Trigger warning
this book needs to be read with absolute caution.There is some serious editing issues. On the whole the writer has a good story but the execution needs a lot of work. There is a lot of expedition, not a lot of description in places and the writers attempt to go back and forth is very jarring (and sometimes bloody unnecessary). I was a fool and did not respect all the post previously and I read this book all of it.
To the writer you’ve got a good idea but you need to spend some time flushing it all out. this could’ve been two books and why do writers feel the need to use rape as a way of talking about trauma. There could be such great possibilities in this book but I think you were so much in a rush to get this book out that you miss the opportunity of making it really stand out. Please don’t write another one to this one because I’m a completeness and like a fucking madman I will bloody read it. don’t do me that way, I beg don’t write no more of this particular book. the next one take your time and getting an editor.
June 1, 2022
0.5 ⭐️
I really don’t understand how I finished this. First it’s a deranged concoction of crazy then you have the worst writing I’ve ever read and finally the major unbelievable and idiotic shifter story ever. I guess this was written by a very young person so the unbelievable plot has an explanation.
First you have the worst alpha in the shifter literature world. He is weak, dumb and manipulable. Second you have an apparently weak she wolf that then became this super ninja warrior who can beat rogues like piece of cake. Third you have a 17 year old super powerful alpha that years ago became an assassin because the council made experiments on him (please!). Fourth you have the worst parents ever: the father of the alpha and the mother of the super ninja warrior. They are this cartoonish pathetic villains and I could continue but it’s not worthy. I would not bother picking this story.
Don’t waste your time.
I really don’t understand how I finished this. First it’s a deranged concoction of crazy then you have the worst writing I’ve ever read and finally the major unbelievable and idiotic shifter story ever. I guess this was written by a very young person so the unbelievable plot has an explanation.
First you have the worst alpha in the shifter literature world. He is weak, dumb and manipulable. Second you have an apparently weak she wolf that then became this super ninja warrior who can beat rogues like piece of cake. Third you have a 17 year old super powerful alpha that years ago became an assassin because the council made experiments on him (please!). Fourth you have the worst parents ever: the father of the alpha and the mother of the super ninja warrior. They are this cartoonish pathetic villains and I could continue but it’s not worthy. I would not bother picking this story.
Don’t waste your time.
November 13, 2021
grammar nightmare
Ok, so there is no grammar, no punctuation, all pov’s are cut and paste, total replicas of the one prior. Towards the end there is roughly 2 chapters worth that is just recycled over and over. Timeline is all wrong, this all appears to happen in a time span of 6-8 weeks, but if a werewolf pregnancy is 9 months and the baby is 2 months old by the time of the wedding (not the MC’s baby), then it’s just plain confusing. This is the second book today that I have read like this (different authors) and all I can think from the way that the ‘instructional’ headings are done is that the editor didn’t do their job and this is an unedited version. Please, when the last two words in a sentence are ‘you are’ or ‘we are’ please don’t put them as you’re and we’re!
Ok, so there is no grammar, no punctuation, all pov’s are cut and paste, total replicas of the one prior. Towards the end there is roughly 2 chapters worth that is just recycled over and over. Timeline is all wrong, this all appears to happen in a time span of 6-8 weeks, but if a werewolf pregnancy is 9 months and the baby is 2 months old by the time of the wedding (not the MC’s baby), then it’s just plain confusing. This is the second book today that I have read like this (different authors) and all I can think from the way that the ‘instructional’ headings are done is that the editor didn’t do their job and this is an unedited version. Please, when the last two words in a sentence are ‘you are’ or ‘we are’ please don’t put them as you’re and we’re!
November 11, 2021
Awesome story
This was such an intriguing read. I loved the closeness that Alessandro shared with his mother. Both willing to die to save the other. Love the twist and turns the story took us on. I kept hoping KeShaun would accept his son and not keep going against him at every turn. So glad that Roselyn and Jermaine were finally able to mate, and Gen and Michael were finally able to have their wedding. It was only fitting that Alessandro would be the one to take his fathers life. Can’t wait to read about Ale finding his mate again, Lilly. Will they know that the council made them into who they are? Will they balance each other? Hopefully they can take down the council members that allowed experiments to be done on children.
Can’t wait to read about Ale find his mat.
This was such an intriguing read. I loved the closeness that Alessandro shared with his mother. Both willing to die to save the other. Love the twist and turns the story took us on. I kept hoping KeShaun would accept his son and not keep going against him at every turn. So glad that Roselyn and Jermaine were finally able to mate, and Gen and Michael were finally able to have their wedding. It was only fitting that Alessandro would be the one to take his fathers life. Can’t wait to read about Ale finding his mate again, Lilly. Will they know that the council made them into who they are? Will they balance each other? Hopefully they can take down the council members that allowed experiments to be done on children.
Can’t wait to read about Ale find his mat.
November 14, 2022
I think the ideas were good, but the book needed some editing.
I don't understand why the Alpha was such a daddy's boy weakling. The former Alpha still made all the decisions for the pack and the Alpha just seemed like his puppet, or like a child with the former Alpha acting as a regent. I never understood WHY he was like that, and why would he be fated to mate a strong wolf like Rose, if he was so weak? But I am glad they didn't reunite. That would suck for Rose.
Maybe Alejandro's story should have been a second book, because there was a lot going on with him that took the focus off the second chance mate story for Rose. It's like, who were the main characters actually supposed to be? I thought it was Rose but I'm not sure. It was everyone. Everyone got a POV.
I don't understand why the Alpha was such a daddy's boy weakling. The former Alpha still made all the decisions for the pack and the Alpha just seemed like his puppet, or like a child with the former Alpha acting as a regent. I never understood WHY he was like that, and why would he be fated to mate a strong wolf like Rose, if he was so weak? But I am glad they didn't reunite. That would suck for Rose.
Maybe Alejandro's story should have been a second book, because there was a lot going on with him that took the focus off the second chance mate story for Rose. It's like, who were the main characters actually supposed to be? I thought it was Rose but I'm not sure. It was everyone. Everyone got a POV.
September 15, 2021
typos and and repeats
Author, you have a wonderful story to tell. I just don’t understand why you literally copy and paste the end of one chapter to the beginning of the other. Please take the time to edit your book and don’t copy and paste just to make it longer. The story is better with out that filler that is unnecessary. If you can find some good beta readers to help you with the repeats and even use a word document to help with the spelling and grammatical errors, you could grow to have a massive following. Please, please, please put the time and energy into your books that they deserve
Author, you have a wonderful story to tell. I just don’t understand why you literally copy and paste the end of one chapter to the beginning of the other. Please take the time to edit your book and don’t copy and paste just to make it longer. The story is better with out that filler that is unnecessary. If you can find some good beta readers to help you with the repeats and even use a word document to help with the spelling and grammatical errors, you could grow to have a massive following. Please, please, please put the time and energy into your books that they deserve
January 16, 2022
The Irrevocable Family Bond -
I started reading this book, thinking that it would help me fall asleep, but I didn’t realise how wrong I was. Once I started reading, I found it quite difficult to stop and I was so engrossed in this action-packed romance story, that I stayed up until the early hours of the morning to finish it. If you want to really enjoy this book, then I suggest you find a quiet place and a few uninterrupted hours, because you will be hooked once you start reading. The only downside to the story is the number of typographical and grammatical errors that are still showing in the book. I will be happy to recommend this book for your reading pleasure.
I started reading this book, thinking that it would help me fall asleep, but I didn’t realise how wrong I was. Once I started reading, I found it quite difficult to stop and I was so engrossed in this action-packed romance story, that I stayed up until the early hours of the morning to finish it. If you want to really enjoy this book, then I suggest you find a quiet place and a few uninterrupted hours, because you will be hooked once you start reading. The only downside to the story is the number of typographical and grammatical errors that are still showing in the book. I will be happy to recommend this book for your reading pleasure.
January 16, 2022
Ok
Good story line, good characters. Simple dialogs and strange.writing style were everything seemed to be rushed. Not a flowing story but a sentence after sentence of cold facts . Made for a strange read. The worst was the constant repeating of exactly the same scenes . Sometimes up to 4 times. We rad one scene from the perspective of one character then it goes ro another characters perspective but there's nothing new just copy and paste 3 pages then another character the same ect. Imagine when there was 4 people in the room , that's approx 10 pages that can be skipped. And it was happening o regular basis. Bizarre.
Good story line, good characters. Simple dialogs and strange.writing style were everything seemed to be rushed. Not a flowing story but a sentence after sentence of cold facts . Made for a strange read. The worst was the constant repeating of exactly the same scenes . Sometimes up to 4 times. We rad one scene from the perspective of one character then it goes ro another characters perspective but there's nothing new just copy and paste 3 pages then another character the same ect. Imagine when there was 4 people in the room , that's approx 10 pages that can be skipped. And it was happening o regular basis. Bizarre.
February 7, 2022
The lack of editing...
I'm not 100% but I'm pretty confident this started as a Wattpad story. It had to! How else to explain the terribly written, repetitive povs? How else so to explain the second grade like run on sentences? The lack of editing is so terrible, I was not able to get far at all, much less finish. I felt like I was having a "falling" nightmare that has me waking up hella (yes, that's Gen X Bay Area speak) dizzy. You know the one where you dream of falling, right? Well, legend has it that if you actually hit the ground, you die. That said, I'm going put this hawt mess down and shake off my vertigo in order to live to read another day.
I'm not 100% but I'm pretty confident this started as a Wattpad story. It had to! How else to explain the terribly written, repetitive povs? How else so to explain the second grade like run on sentences? The lack of editing is so terrible, I was not able to get far at all, much less finish. I felt like I was having a "falling" nightmare that has me waking up hella (yes, that's Gen X Bay Area speak) dizzy. You know the one where you dream of falling, right? Well, legend has it that if you actually hit the ground, you die. That said, I'm going put this hawt mess down and shake off my vertigo in order to live to read another day.
August 20, 2021
Needs editing
I really enjoyed this book. The story line kept me wanting more... But the book lacked editing. It did make the story hard to read at times because I would either find myself auto correcting or just being dumbfounded and trying to figure out what the author is trying to say. Really it kind of reminds me of a book that's been translated badly. The story is good mint like I said it really needs to be edited better. That's why I give this book three stars.
I really enjoyed this book. The story line kept me wanting more... But the book lacked editing. It did make the story hard to read at times because I would either find myself auto correcting or just being dumbfounded and trying to figure out what the author is trying to say. Really it kind of reminds me of a book that's been translated badly. The story is good mint like I said it really needs to be edited better. That's why I give this book three stars.
September 8, 2021
WTH
WTH did I just read? The plot was very good. The spelling and grammar was horrible..Run on sentences all over the place. No punctuation what so ever. I didn't know when the sentence ended or began. There is a tool to proofread and check for errors..All the different POV's.. all that did was, tell me the same thing two to three times..Uggghhh.
Yes, I still read it.. Luckily for me, my English and grammar are still over the top, sort of speak.
WTH did I just read? The plot was very good. The spelling and grammar was horrible..Run on sentences all over the place. No punctuation what so ever. I didn't know when the sentence ended or began. There is a tool to proofread and check for errors..All the different POV's.. all that did was, tell me the same thing two to three times..Uggghhh.
Yes, I still read it.. Luckily for me, my English and grammar are still over the top, sort of speak.
December 10, 2021
Good Story Bad Editing
The story is good, drama filled and action packed, I enjoyed the plot twists and would like to see what comes next. However, this book needs major editing, there are grammar errors and wrong words in places but not so horrible you don’t know what is meant, the biggest issue is lack of any punctuation other than a period and random exclamation point. Also spacing between people POV would be great.
The story is good, drama filled and action packed, I enjoyed the plot twists and would like to see what comes next. However, this book needs major editing, there are grammar errors and wrong words in places but not so horrible you don’t know what is meant, the biggest issue is lack of any punctuation other than a period and random exclamation point. Also spacing between people POV would be great.
January 17, 2022
shame
All right, this book was the worse I have read so far, in that it is full of spelling mistakes, typos, missing punctuation, and very poor grammar, and more.
Every single page was full of these, and to be honest I’m baffled by the fact that the author thought she could publish it. It’s that bad, it’s embarrassing.
It’s a shame, since the plot was good, and I did want to see how it ended.
All right, this book was the worse I have read so far, in that it is full of spelling mistakes, typos, missing punctuation, and very poor grammar, and more.
Every single page was full of these, and to be honest I’m baffled by the fact that the author thought she could publish it. It’s that bad, it’s embarrassing.
It’s a shame, since the plot was good, and I did want to see how it ended.
February 5, 2022
run on sentences/wrong words used etc
Honestly, I skipped to the end after awhile. Horribly written. I assume the author doesn’t speak/write English as their first language. Run on sentences drove me nuts- like they didn’t bother to edit the book at all. It felt like something you’d read on those random book apps these days where anyone can be an author and you regret even starting a new story.
Honestly, I skipped to the end after awhile. Horribly written. I assume the author doesn’t speak/write English as their first language. Run on sentences drove me nuts- like they didn’t bother to edit the book at all. It felt like something you’d read on those random book apps these days where anyone can be an author and you regret even starting a new story.
March 4, 2022
Good story. Needs massive editing.
The overall story is engaging though there are moments that are a bit cliche, the author does an excellent job of making this story unique.
However, this book is in desperate need of a professional editor. The punctuation and grammar needs extensive review and the author frequently uses incorrect homophones.
I would love to read the sequel but do not know if I want to risk it due to my current grammar migraine.
The overall story is engaging though there are moments that are a bit cliche, the author does an excellent job of making this story unique.
However, this book is in desperate need of a professional editor. The punctuation and grammar needs extensive review and the author frequently uses incorrect homophones.
I would love to read the sequel but do not know if I want to risk it due to my current grammar migraine.
April 29, 2022
The story line was intriguing. I do not mind the back and forth of different perspectives other than the fact that although it was premised a being a different point of view it was actually completely the same.
There is a ton of punctuation and spelling errors that need to be corrected but overall not a bad storyline. Cleanup is definitely needed but I'm glad it was left open for a sequel I was wondering what happened to the girl he had seen and declared was his mate.
There is a ton of punctuation and spelling errors that need to be corrected but overall not a bad storyline. Cleanup is definitely needed but I'm glad it was left open for a sequel I was wondering what happened to the girl he had seen and declared was his mate.
September 2, 2022
This is a fanfiction turned book. I am not on principal against turning fanfictions into published books but at least there should have been a good editor.
The story was everywhere. Some people were over the top evil and there was no reason for that evilness. I just dont/ didnt get the plot of this book.
This storyline had so much potential. A rejected mate coming back to her pack, facing her ex-mate. The story could have been so much better. Alas lost potential.
The story was everywhere. Some people were over the top evil and there was no reason for that evilness. I just dont/ didnt get the plot of this book.
This storyline had so much potential. A rejected mate coming back to her pack, facing her ex-mate. The story could have been so much better. Alas lost potential.
July 29, 2021
Ok storyline, but editor needed badly
I actually was backing this storyline and the cliff hanging ending would lead you to the next read. But OMG this book needs some serious editing. The typos are painful, the lowercase i KILLS me. There are author notes left in this book! I loved the character of Alessandro but a 13 year old assassin? Questionable.
I actually was backing this storyline and the cliff hanging ending would lead you to the next read. But OMG this book needs some serious editing. The typos are painful, the lowercase i KILLS me. There are author notes left in this book! I loved the character of Alessandro but a 13 year old assassin? Questionable.
August 7, 2021
The description made this story sound amazing, but sadly it lost my interest quite quickly. I understand that there are spelling and grammar errors, but what has me stuck is the sorry as a whole. It could certainly get better reviews if it was adjusted properly but it feels more like a rough draft then an actual tale of a family who is in search of their happiness.
August 20, 2021
Great story. Terrible editing
I am looking for the next book as i really enjoyed the character building and storyline.
An editor or proofreader would have picked up the spelling, grammar and spots where the story repeated and restarted a couple of times but the great character building and storyline made up for it 100%
I am looking for the next book as i really enjoyed the character building and storyline.
An editor or proofreader would have picked up the spelling, grammar and spots where the story repeated and restarted a couple of times but the great character building and storyline made up for it 100%
October 7, 2021
good story
The story is good, but too many spelling mistakes and grammar, I know it’s peoples points of view but to repeat it the same way 2/3 times , was too much so could have been left to 1 person’s point of view. Writing 3 whole songs out fully was another waste. Just write the title and who sung it would have been enough.
The story is good, but too many spelling mistakes and grammar, I know it’s peoples points of view but to repeat it the same way 2/3 times , was too much so could have been left to 1 person’s point of view. Writing 3 whole songs out fully was another waste. Just write the title and who sung it would have been enough.
October 16, 2021
too many grammatical errors
If you can get passed all the grammatical errors the story can be good. Hard to tell who’s talking cause there’s no periods. There’s a repeated chapter, ending seemed really rushed and confusing. I tried to like it, it was good in the beginning but the errors got too much. And the POV were all over the place.
If you can get passed all the grammatical errors the story can be good. Hard to tell who’s talking cause there’s no periods. There’s a repeated chapter, ending seemed really rushed and confusing. I tried to like it, it was good in the beginning but the errors got too much. And the POV were all over the place.
November 24, 2021
Some good ideas but poorly written
This book has some goods but they are not well developed & that saying a lot considering the length of the book. There are so many spelling & grammatical errors in some places it's hard to understand. That being said the 2 main characters really caught my imagination & had ne rooting for them.
This book has some goods but they are not well developed & that saying a lot considering the length of the book. There are so many spelling & grammatical errors in some places it's hard to understand. That being said the 2 main characters really caught my imagination & had ne rooting for them.
November 26, 2021
Work
The story line plot is good, kind of. Plot has potential and the characters seemed to have some depth to begin with. But I couldn’t read past the 8th chapter. The badly incorporated depth to the characters is so poorly done it reminds me of a teenage girls attempt at a Wattpad famous story. Sorry I tried to be nice, but I couldn’t do it.
The story line plot is good, kind of. Plot has potential and the characters seemed to have some depth to begin with. But I couldn’t read past the 8th chapter. The badly incorporated depth to the characters is so poorly done it reminds me of a teenage girls attempt at a Wattpad famous story. Sorry I tried to be nice, but I couldn’t do it.
January 4, 2022
so conflicted.
This story was actually sincerely original. Very interesting. BUT the punctuation was the worst ever. Throughout the entire book I had to reread sentences to figure out how it was read. Comma’s are IMPORTANT. It’s the difference between “I enjoy cooking, my cats and long walks.” Verses “I enjoy cooking my cats and long walks. Seriously. So important.
This story was actually sincerely original. Very interesting. BUT the punctuation was the worst ever. Throughout the entire book I had to reread sentences to figure out how it was read. Comma’s are IMPORTANT. It’s the difference between “I enjoy cooking, my cats and long walks.” Verses “I enjoy cooking my cats and long walks. Seriously. So important.
January 9, 2022
interesting story but terrible errors
Overall the story was interesting and good … but there are multiple grammatical errors, misspellings on words , wrong words used and duplicated parts of story. Who ever proof read this either didn’t or was asleep at the time. If one of my students had submitted this I would have returned it telling them to redo it properly
Overall the story was interesting and good … but there are multiple grammatical errors, misspellings on words , wrong words used and duplicated parts of story. Who ever proof read this either didn’t or was asleep at the time. If one of my students had submitted this I would have returned it telling them to redo it properly
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