The Thing I'm Most Afraid Of

by Kristin Levine

In 1993, twelve-year-old Becca, who struggles with a anxiety disorder, visits her divorced father in Vienna, Austria, where she befriends a Muslim refugee fleeing the Bosnian genocide.

Genres: Middle Grade, Historical Fiction, Mental Health, War, Childrens, Audiobook, Fiction

352 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 15, 2021

Reviews

[Julie Suzanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

There's a lot to love about this one.

--The setting: Not too many books (none that I've encountered) are set in Austria during the Bosnian civil war, and we are lucky enough to travel to this time and place with a sweet 12-year-old girl and her equally loveable found family. She is curious, asks important questions, and the reader learns in an age-appropriate way that atrocities are occurring in Bosnia, the victims are leaving their land seeking asylum elsewhere, and the countries who at first were eager to take them in become increasingly concerned about the number of refugees and their ability to accommodate them (the ones that are not wealthy, that is). Becca's stay in Austria coincides with a potential turning point, where legislation is being proposed to keep the country "pure" as a way of controlling the situation. This is interesting history, and Levine helps the reader make connections between what is happening here in the 1990's to what happened in Nazi Germany which ultimately may lead the reader to see similar patterns in today's world. I love when Becca wonders if laws that seem perfectly acceptable today will in the future seem horrible, like how Slavery was once legal and now everyone can see that it was wrong. Readers may be prompted to think critically about government and legislation, and they'll definitely be prompted to see refugees as human beings needing help rather than as parasites clawing their way into countries to do damage.

--Mental health, anxiety: Everyone experiences anxiety sometimes, but some people have real problem, an anxiety disorder that needs treatment. Becca is one of these people for whom anxiety has taken control and ruined her quality of life. She has a great therapist and coping mechanisms, and as she works on herself throughout the course of the story, she benefits from the support and tips from her new friends who also experience anxiety and fear (but in healthy doses) and she uses what SHE has learned to help them. It's a sweet little support group they create, and I love that every single character in this book is healthy, positive, helpful, caring, supportive, and brave even though they are normal. There are no mean girls, no bullies, no villains, no abuse. Any child who experiences occasional anxiety or even those that have too much will find help from the everyday experiences that occur in this book.

--Culture: I loved seeing how things are different in Austria! Or, at least, how it was different from American culture in the 90's. Readers get to take a virtual field trip to Vienna and Prague with a character that is not eye-rolling and dying of boredom the whole time. Becca is not one of those exceptional children who totally geek out on history and museums; she's a healthy tween with a normal amount of curiosity and interest in the world yet still has a lot to learn. Readers will learn right along with her that you have to pay to use the bathroom there, that water is not free when you eat out, that recycling is a much bigger deal because the government there cares about the environment, etc. They'll also see what is the same everywhere.

I learned nothing new about the Bosnian war because I just read an actual memoir from a survivor, but I think it is enough for this audience, just right.

I highly recommend this to middle school students. While I was never bored, it does really start to pick up about 3/4s through, and then it's hard to put down.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

The cover doesn’t do this book any justice but since I’ve really loved a few of the authors other books (The Lions of Little Rock and The Paper Cowboy), I wanted to read a few of her other books. Twelve-year old Becca is brilliant. In my world, she’s gifted and Becca’s Doomsday Journals are a testament to this. If you could ask her, she could pinpoint for you, exactly where she wrote down each anxiety that she has faced, in the numerous Doomsday Journals that she keeps. And now, Becca is flying to Austria to spend the summer with her father. Do you realize what this entails? I’m not sure Becca has enough new journals for this trip.

The characters inside this book were fantastic. We have Becca, who needs to pack-up her anxiety, hop on a plane, and visit her father for the summer. Wait, it gets even better because her father has a girlfriend with a son, Felix that’s about Becca’s age. With the adults working during the day, they hired Sara to entertain the kids and take them on trips throughout the city. I’m getting anxiety just thinking about this, so I can’t imagine what must be running through Becca’s head. Becca’s mom is flying with her to Austria (thank you, mom) and then, mom’s taking a backpacking trip (I guess she won’t be easily available should Becca need her). Wow, that’s a lot for Becca to process!

Becca doesn’t want anyone to know about her anxiety and she tries to hide it but obviously, she can’t. As Sara tries to show them a good time, Becca’s hesitation and reluctancy shows. When Becca comes clean, she realizes that she’s not alone but what’s next? Now that the three of them have come together, how can they move forward?

I loved how they worked together and encouraged one another. I enjoyed the inspiration, the motivation, and the friendship that they built. Although they each felt alone with own challenges, they really had similar feelings that when they finally expressed them, they could worked together/help each other to find solutions. Another great book. 4.5 stars

[Josephine Sorrell · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s 1993, and Becca lives in northern Virginia, dividing her time between her happily and amicable divorced parents. Her world is turned upside down when she learns her father will be moving to Vienna for work and she will be spending two months with him over summer vacation. You see, Becca suffers from anxiety and panic attacks, and now must face her fears… crowds, airplanes, metal detectors, blood clots, cancer.
Her mom is flying with her, and she carries her Doomsday Journal, where she writes down everything that weighs on her mind. In Austria, Becca meets Sara Tahirović, the 19-year-old Bosnian Muslim au pair from Sarajevo who will be looking after her and Felix. Felix the quiet, bookworm son of her father’s new girlfriend. Becca explores Vienna and learns about the ongoing war in the former Yugoslavia and how it has affected Sara and her family back home. Inspired by Sara’s resilience and ambitions, Becca decides to make a list and do all the things she fears most. In this thoughtful novel populated with well-developed characters, Levine slowly and realistically reveals Becca’s growth, including her shifting relationships with her father, Sara, and Felix.

[Mae · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. This book was enjoyable, and I always wanted to keep reading it. The main character had good character development, and I love how much she changed from beginning to end! On the other hand, it wasn’t a book that I’m like: you need to read this right now!! And I probably won’t remember it forever.

[Hoover Public Library Kids and Teens · Rating 5 out of 5]

Becca has anxiety and getting on a plane to visit her father in Austria for a whole summer is really pushing her to her limits. But the trip helps her in so many ways, especially her relationship with her au pair -- a Bosnian refugee who doesn't know what has happened to her family since they were separated.

[Barbara · Rating 3 out of 5]

This middle grade novel about facing one's fears is a 3.5 for me. One of its strengths is how the description of Vienna, where the story is set in 1993, will make readers fall in love with the city and long to visit Austria. Several passages are culturally rich and make it clear that Austria is quite different from the United States. Twelve-year-old Becca suffers from almost crippling anxiety related to her concerns that various pursuits may result in injury, illness or death. Although she has a therapist and has developed some coping strategies, including a Doomsday Journal, she still suffers from panic attacks in new situations. Flying to Vienna to spend several weeks with her father while her mother backpacks around Europe is definitely out of her comfort zone. The fact that her father, who is divorced from her mother, has a new girlfriend, Katarina, with a son of her own, Felix, doesn't make her feel any more comfortable. Because the youngsters will be on their own for much of the visit, Becca's father makes arrangements for Felix's au pair to keep them entertained and explore the city. Sara is a Muslim refugee from Bosnia, and she worries about the whereabouts of her mother and little brother who are still there while conflict rages. Slowly, with support from Felix and Sara, Becca takes little steps in conquering her fears, making a list of things that she fears but is willing to try. As it turns out, Felix and Sara also have fears of their own, and Sara realizes that her ideas about bravery and courage are backward and that her fears are limiting her experiences. And when something terrible happens to Sara on one of their trips, she rises to the occasion. There is so much joy in this book as well as moments of humor and triumph, and readers will be interested in the anti-refugee sentiment that was present among some Austrians at that time, quite similar to what is being expressed today in this country as well as other parts of the world. As another reviewer noted, I'm not sure that students in this particular time period expressed concerns about anxiety or having an anxiety disorder as openly as Becca does, but I'm willing to not let that concern keep me from enjoying or recommending the book. As usual, Kristine Levine has crafted a story that makes readers care about her characters and the parts of history through which they are living.

[gabbi ☆]

I don't know what to rate this book yet, I still need to think about it. 😅😝

good things!!
-The setting!!!! It was very unique and different from any other book I had read. Austria during the Bosnian War, which I had very little knowledge about. This book was definitely educational! :)
-The pacing! This book kept me engaged the whole time without ever making me confused, it was a refreshing read in that way. And I got through the physical copy!! 🎵for the first time in forever🎵🤪
-The writing style. it was easy to read at the same time as being face paced and complex and educational and making me thinking and the author really just has this voice that makes the characters come to life.
-The characters! I especially loved Sara, she was so strong and admirable.
-The ballroom dancing!!! Ahhhhh why don't they have balls in America??? 😭😍
-the cover. it is gorgeous!!!! pulled me in from the very beginning

bad things :(
*while there wasn't any serious problems with this book, there were a couple of things that were off to me
-I felt like the author was trying to make a point about immigration in modern day, which was fine (I agreed). In my opinion, it was all great until she started comparing it to Hitler and ww2. maybe I wasn't completely understanding tho cuz I read that part quickly.
-Becca's struggle with anxiety was pretty realistic and interesting. However, I felt like it overexplained anxiety a lot of times, and was trying to hard to be poignant and sentimental and sweet and stuff. idk. I also kept getting annoyed with her for it, and then feeling guilty about that cuz she really was doing her best. I think that is just my problem though, because I often get really annoyed at myself and my own anxiety and prefer to pretend it doesn't exist (ik, suuuuper healthy and all that but it works most the time!!!!)

anyways, it was a pretty good book and thanks for making it to the end of this very ramble-y review! I hope you enjoyed watching my grammar and punctuation decline throughout the review 😜

[Rhoda]

I actually just started this book and am several chapters in but already don’t have much of a desire to continue reading it. I’ve been trying to find clean books for children, middle-grade teens, and older teenagers (to have a list to share with people). The time period of the story, the location, and the historical aspect sounded unique, so I was definitely intrigued. Plus, I liked the cover.

Unfortunately, within the first few chapters, the main character comes across a magazine with full frontal nudity. Of course, she's shocked, but her father and his girlfriend are totally unfazed. This was very unnecessary; I wonder why authors choose to include things sometimes...Also, I am not too keen on the concept of the character having a severe anxiety problem. So far, it’s really not working for me as a reader. The author intends for it to be comedic, but I tired of it quickly. Anxiety like that wasn’t as common in the 90s among that age group, since I was a kid in the 90s, and I do not recall encountering that as much as I encounter it now among children and teens. What was more prevalent back then was ADD and ADHD. There has been a rise in anxiety in recent years, but not so sure in the year this book was written.

I made the decision to not continue books I'm not enjoying, so I think I’m just going to put this one aside instead of finishing it.

[The Keepers of the Books · Rating 4 out of 5]

12-year-old, Becca’s parents are divorced. Dad wants her to fly to Vienna for the summer of 1993. But Becca has anxiety, and her mind always travels to the worst-case-scenario which filles her with fear and panic attacks. Soon, she sets off for a European adventure with the help of her doomsday journal to help her cope with her fears and possible reactions. In Vienna, she meets her dad’s new girlfriend, her son Felix, and her new au-pair Sara (a 19-year-old Bosnian refugee). With her new friends she learns about the fears and trials others face and learns new coping mechanisms. The main character is wonderfully complex and realistic. The plot is a well-developed story of how Becca grows and finds a more expansive world view and gains hope. Readers who enjoy realistic fiction, self-discovery, and overcoming fears will enjoy reading this book. 4 stars, Grades 4 to 7

Please note: This was a review copy given to us by NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review. No financial compensation was received.

[Mirad Meer · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really liked this book. It's super easy to read but even though it's written for a younger audience I think it has a large appeal. Seeing the world through a child's eyes is always nice. I got to experience seeing a new country and exploring it with new friends all from the comfort of my dorm room. The taste of farm fresh soft boiled eggs and the beauty of the opera is conveyed amazingly. I now want to go to Austria more than ever. I also learned a surprising amount about Yugoslavia and the resulting conflicts, it's sad that the struggles Sara had to go through are so similar to what many have to go through still today. But the contrast between a normal adolescents problems and the one of a refugee is a nice one. We all have problems big or small, but still all cats look grey in the dark and we are all just people.

[Bernadette Kearns · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. The historical aspects of the Bosnian refugee crisis in the book will enable middle grade readers to make connections to the current refugee crisis facing immigrants to America (as well as other parts of the world). It’s such an important issue to understand. The descriptions of life in Vienna were also fascinating and would make any reader want to visit such a lovely place to experience its culture. But for me, the realistic portrayal of anxiety in both Becca and Felix’s characters made this book spectacular. Readers get a view of how these characters are limited by anxiety, how they try to overcome it and fail, and how they use strategies to successfully navigate their “lists.” So well done. Highly recommend for kids who struggle with anxiety themselves and also to their peers so they can understand how to be an ally.

[Emily Bush · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Thing I'm Most Afraid Of is a wonderful books for anyone dealing with anxiety. The main character, Becca, has a lot of fears. So many she has filled 3 Doomsday Journals with them and is working on her 4th. When her dad moves to Austria, she has to overcome a lot of her fears to be able to visit him. Everything from the x-ray machine, to the airplane scares Becca. When she gets to Austria, she meets new friends, including her au pair Sara. Sara is a refugee from Bosnia who fled because of the civil war. With Sara's help, Becca learns what it means to be brave and begins to find ways to overcome some of her fears. This is a sweet book that covers a lot of good subjects: anxiety, refugees, fear, love, and how to cope.

Thank you to NetGalley for the advance copy.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Becca spends the summer visiting her Dad in Vienna and worrying about all the things that make her anxious. Her Dad surprises her by bringing his new girlfriend and her son Felix to meet her at the airport. They also bring Sara, a young Bosnian refugee who will be their au pair for the summer. Becca, Felix, and Sara explore the city and Becca realizes she’s not the only one with anxiety. When they make a trip to Prague, Sara falls victim to a crime and is detained at the border. Becca and Felix must overcome their insecurities to help save Sara. Levine includes a chapter where Becca and her family attend the Lichtermeer counter-protest to the far-right “Austria first” movement. A good introduction to the Bosnian war for upper elementary/middle grade readers.

[Mary Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Becca is spending the summer in Vienna, Austria with her father. She wants to be excited, but really is just anxious. Really anxious. She has such high anxiety she keeps Doomsday Journals that tell her what to do in the inevitable emergency. This summer, however, all that is about to change. She will learn how to push through some of those anxieties and to start pushing back on her fear thanks to a few new friends. Set in the 1990s the book weaves in the narrative on the Bosnian conflict and the impact on Austrian politics. This book will linger with you long after the reading is done. The parallels to that time in history and what was happening in Bosnia correlates directly to what is happening now in the United States and around the world. Beautifully written and highly recommended.

[LPR · Rating 4 out of 5]

Levine absolutely BRINGS IT every time, and this was no exception.

pardon this sounding like a sixth grade assignment but I had to write an example review for sixth grade anyway so here we go:

Becca is a twelve year old girl who is traveling to Austria to spend the summer of 1993 with her father. Becca has trouble managing her intense anxiety, but she learns a lot from Sara, a teenager who fled Bosnia during the conflicts and knows about fear. Becca’s summer is full of adventure, music, and overcoming her fears by dealing with them head on.

I would recommend this book to a reader who likes realistic fiction but wants to explore other times and faraway places as well. It was well written and held my interest through the funny parts, the tense parts, and the heartfelt parts.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Twelve year old Becca must overcome her many anxieties to spend a summer with her dad and his new girlfriend in Austria. She befriends her nanny Sara, a refugee from Bosnia, and becomes involved in seeking Sara's missing mother and brother. I really liked reading this book because it's full of German words and phrases, and though it's been a while since I took six years of High School German, I had fun reading the foreign language parts. My sixth graders may or may not feel the same, but many of them will identify with Becca's struggle with anxiety and her fierce determination not to disappoint her dad.

[Brittany · Rating 4 out of 5]

The thing I love the most about Kristin Levine novels is that they are so thoroughly researched - she's like the Jodi Picoult of middle-grade novels. In this particular story, the main character's struggles with anxiety were expertly written and it truly felt like I was experiencing the panic and shortness of breath right along with her. The Bosnian War and this part of the world is something I knew basically nothing about, so this fictional story was steeped with actual facts, and showcased how chillingly familiar the current state of the US is now. The conclusion of this story may have been a bit tidy all things considered, but for a middle-grade novel it landed just right.

[Olivia · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was really good and I felt like I could really relate to the main charterer Becca because sometimes I get fearful over things others would not. In the book Becca is flying to Austria to see her dad. She suffers from severe anxiety and she fears that the metal detectors at the airport will give her cancer and that the flight will give her blood clots. She also has to meet her dads new girlfriend, the girlfriends son, and the new nanny Sara. It is a great book that I would definitely recommend.

[Suzy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kristin Levine has such a way with shaping characters and I love it! This is a beautiful book about Becca and her living with her severe anxiety and dealing with it in a new place with new people. I liked the unexpected friendship Becca and Felix formed. And I really loved how Becca found ways to face her fears. Another beautiful book by Kristin Levine, that any middle grader dealing with anxiety will find comfort in.

Thanks NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC!

[Tina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love pretty much anything Levine writes. She totally nailed it in terms of what anxiety feels like and gave some pretty good advice (without it seeming like advice) about how to deal with it. I also loved the fact that she wrote about the Bosnian War in the 1990s. I haven't seen a lot of fiction about this but I had several students who had lived through it and wished I had something for them several years ago already.

[Christina · Rating 2 out of 5]

First review of the year. Yet another case of me not remembering where I got this book from or why it was on my list. As I started to read I started thinking was I looking for some thing for school, was it the Bosnia storyline, or was it the Austria peace? I listened to this book and I found Becca very irritating, could be because she’s so young, could be the narrator who is reading the book. Definitely was not enough Bosnia or Austria and this story for me.

[BiblioBrandie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Set in Vienna in 1993, I liked the setting and time a lot. I liked the intro to the Bosnian war, even though I would have liked more. I just read All You Kneed is Love and is it me or are there a lot of books about anxiety this year? Seems like it's a response to all the anxiety kids are feeling these days. I like how Becca keeps a journal of worst case scenarios to cope with her anxiety. Good character growth fo Becca. Sara seems to have unending patience given all she was going through.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very relevant read about anxiety and the affects of war. I loved the approach to anxiety the characters took, I loved the beauty and culture of Austria, I loved the sound of music references, and I really appreciated reading about a refugee and her experience, especially with current events.

An easy read (middle school,) but a very well written one with a lot of hope and courage. I really enjoyed reading this book and it left me with things to think about.

[Jill · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I think the best way to deal with uncertainty…is to sit with it. Invite it in. Trust ourselves that we can handle it. And if we have family or friends to sit with us, well then, we are extra lucky.”

I loved this story that explores anxiety and finding the courage to face fears, along with tough topics of asylum and immigration. I loved the pig notebook, the power of friendship and the descriptions of Vienna.

[Karla · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been trying to pinpoint what I really liked about this book that made me give it a 5* and I cannot quite nail it down. I liked the characters, I liked the realistic portrayal of relationships, I really liked the "historical" setting that involved the Bosnian war (which is rarely written on in fiction I see) and I liked that having been to Vienna I could envision some of the places. Audiobook was very well done.

[Blue · Rating 4 out of 5]

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While this was a small book it had a great amount of love in the details to create such a great setting. I have to admit that the characters weren't as entertaining as I hoped

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked this one. At first I struggled while reading it because all of her anxiety and worries made me anxious while reading it (perhaps that was the point) but as the book went on there were some beautiful messages about anxiety and how being brave doesn’t mean the anxiety is gone, it means you do it anyway. A great story!!

[Sheila · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a nice read for middle school-aged readers. I don't fit this readership, so it felt a bit slow in the first half, but it's probably just read for 12-13-year-olds. I like how Levine provided coping mechanisms for the protagonist's anxiety that felt real and do-able rather than overly ideal. Everything wasn't magically fixed at the end of this book, but it was hopeful.

[LS Johnson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I got annoyed that Becca thought her fear and worry about riding bikes or large crowds was similar to fears of an immigrant missing her family. I wished there had been more historical aspects because I’ve never seen this time period of history in a children’s fiction book.

[AMANDA PROSIN · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great middle grades book about anxiety, friendship, family and facing fears. Set in Austria during the early 1990s. Political climate reminiscent of 2010s with America First mindset. Austria First. Anti immigrant/refugee.