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Cowboy

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Marcus was just passing through Texas when he met Kent. In his cowboy hat, low-riding jeans, and black boots, Kent looks like the type of guy Marcus desperately wants to love.

But two years later, he's discovered Kent is cold and distant, the quintessential American cowboy, and spends more time drunk than sober. Marcus can never predict his mood and blames himself for the flailing relationship.

Then, one day when Kent rides into town, Marcus finds a young runaway hiding in their barn. Luke is warm, loving, and quick to please ... everything Kent is not. Though the answer seems obvious, Marcus finds himself torn between the boy who demands his love and the man whose love he craves.

122 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2004

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175 people want to read

About the author

J.M. Snyder

302 books567 followers
An author of gay erotic/romantic fiction, J.M. Snyder began in self-publishing and worked with Amber Allure, Aspen Mountain, eXcessica, and Torquere Presses.

Snyder's highly erotic short gay fiction has been published online at Amazon Shorts, Eros Monthly, Ruthie's Club, and Tit-Elation, as well as in anthologies by Alyson Books, Aspen Mountain, Cleis Press, eXcessica Publishing, Lethe Press, and Ravenous Romance.

In 2010, Snyder founded JMS Books LLC, a royalty-paying queer small press that publishes in both electronic and print format. For more information on newest releases and submission guidelines, please visit JMS Books LLC online.

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5 stars
18 (11%)
4 stars
41 (26%)
3 stars
56 (35%)
2 stars
32 (20%)
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10 (6%)
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
Profile Image for Unapologetic_Bookaholic.
646 reviews84 followers
April 26, 2009
One person's story about how they saw love and how they wanted to love. Until temptation came along.

This is a short story so I am finding it hard to review w/o given something away. I can say that J M Snyder works magic with the emotional depth of the character. It is told in first person from the POV of Marcus who went West looking for his own cowboy.

The sex is different than what I have read in other m/m romances. It was healing in a way. I have never read love scenes written in this way and have it be so believable.
Profile Image for SJ.
2,020 reviews32 followers
May 14, 2024
With the long, flat, and dusty Texas highway rolling through this story, the side of the road flower stand is an oasis of color and cool refreshment for travelers and townspeople. Repeat customers are there for the flower stand and garden owner, Kent. He is becoming a broke down alcoholic, but still embodies the looks of the Marlboro man and every handsome cowboy who ever rode a horse. He goes shirtless all day in his boots and Stetson as he waters his flowers and interacts with customers. The women he treats with aloofness as their attention is unwanted and Kent is gay.
Living with him is Marcus, whose stream of consciousness POV was well written and held my interest. Marcus was drifting through Texas and ended up staying with Kent and taking care of the house, cooking, flower selling. Marcus is desperately in love with the idea of Kent. He sees all too clearly that he is not loved back. The separate bedrooms, lack of conversation, loneliness when Kent goes into town to drink, and the perfunctory sex while drunk, has taken its toll on Marcus. He pushes away the truth of today in hope of a better tomorrow, when Kent might sober up, finally take a shower, and really see Marcus.
So, the book has a low self esteem enabler with a touch of Stockholm Syndrome. Marcus is very well written. Likable and pitiful. Things would have gone on like this until he comes across a vagrant sleeping in the barn. Luke, a twenty year old answer to a lonely man’s dream. He is beautiful and hot and hot for Marcus. There is no jumping into bed, Marcus wants to be loyal to distant Kent, but, oh, the temptation every second of each hot day is there, and there is some giving in to wanting to feel wanted.
Surprisingly, Kent lets Luke stay to help with the gardening. I think he sees that Marcus has slavish devotion to this life with him.
The writer mentions that they let readers vote for Marcus to stay or go with Luke who wants to continue on his journey and wants Marcus to go with him.
There was such a feeling of tension in the writing and in me while reading this that I didn’t enjoy it the way someone who is more dispassionate about the subject would. I truly did not know which way the story would end.
The three men are all good characters and are well written. We see them through Marcus’s eyes. The heat is excellent in the book and the last chapter is superb.
The writing has a Steinbeck vibe.
I read this at Kobo.
Profile Image for Emanuela ~plastic duck~.
805 reviews121 followers
October 29, 2012
It took me ages to finish this book, because it's unbearable at moments, a big train wreck waiting to happen. So I read, put it down, read, put it down, until I was able to get to the last 50% and finish it almost in one go.

It's not an easy book, because the three protagonists all have their share of flaws. At least for me. So.

Marcus, the narrator, is from a good family. Travelling west he met Kent, the epitome of the cowboy. Handsome, strong, silent, rough. On the outside he's all to die for, but when you get closer you meet a guy who's digging himself an early grave through drinking, who's not so keen on taking showers, who steals from his own cash register to buy beer and who's the most selfish and lousy lover you could meet.

Still, Marcus hangs on to him. He cleans the house, keeps the books, tries to be lovely and caring and to breach through the man. Marcus is grateful for the way Kent welcomed him in his life, gave him a job, a house, meals, but he can't help feeling dissatisfied with this lack of affection.

On a day when Kent is away to do some errands, Luke arrives, a cute young man who's been fleeing from home and who only owns the clothes he's wearing. Kent has never been loved either and he has a lot of love to give. Marcus craves for what Luke has to offer, but he also feels he has to be loyal to Kent.

My problems with the characters - personal issues, nothing to do with the way the author protrayed them: Kent is selfish, I can't see a reason why Marcus has to be so accomodating. He knows he's not meeting Marcus' needs, and I also think he knows he's taking advantage of the man's devotion. Marcus is indecisive and a bit childish sometimes. I didn't have the impression he was such a great help to Kent in his job, sitting there by the cash register. Also, with his picture book of cowboys under the bed, he seemed someone who was refusing to grow up, a bit immature. I was thinking he also didn't want to lose the security Kent gave him and he looked very clueless a lot of time. Luke is needy and pushy, I could forgive the former, not the latter. He knew he was inciting Marcus to cheat on Kent, and I don't care how selfish Kent was, but it's not appropriate. The sexual tension was great, though, and you could really feel the desire floating in the air.

I don't think it's a book I'd recommended, because it's not all flowers and romance and because of the unpleasantness of the characters. I think it's a book you could really get to hate. You'll have to take your chances with this one. Kudos to the author for tackling this level of imperfection.
Profile Image for Ashley D.
1,357 reviews12 followers
September 26, 2016
I wanted to like this book but I just couldn't like it has much as I wish I could have, the romance between Kent and Marcus was just horrible. It felt like Marcus made the whole thing up in his head, and then you add Luke into the mix and Marcus was like a ping pong ball, he couldn't decide who he wanted to be with and who he loved. He loved them both, he liked the way Luke made him feel but he loved the look of Kent.

Kent is a drunk throughout the whole book, and Marcus continually explain it away as he isn't a violent drunk and he loves me, even though Kent never shows him any affections or states that he loves Marcus. Whereas Luke continually is trying to show Marcus how he feels about him as well as telling him.
Profile Image for Emily.
629 reviews14 followers
November 20, 2017
How do you know that you are loved? Is it through words or actions? When have you tried long, and hard, enough to make a relationship work? What makes you decide that you need, and deserve, something more?

These are all questions plaguing Marcus, the main character of Cowboy. For two years, he has been living and working alongside Kent. They sleep in separate bedrooms and have infrequent sex, at the mercy of whatever alcohol Kent has most recently imbibed. Marcus has convinced himself that he is happy with his life, grasping at any hint of affection or intimacy from Kent.

When Luke enters his life, Marcus begins to question everything he knows. The boy is so open with his feelings and desires, and thrives on physical contact of any kind. Luke is the antithesis of Kent in just about every way possible. He is everything that Kent isn’t, and everything that Marcus desires.

As Marcus’ feelings for Luke intensify, he is torn between the two men. Does he stay with Kent, the man he has cared for and loved for so long, that is everything he thought he wanted, or does he leave with Luke to a future that is full of unknowns?

This is not your typical cowboy story and it is a commanding analysis of what it means to be loved. Snyder has created a gut-wrenching portrayal of a man struggling to choose between two men. This is no easy decision for Marcus. He fights feelings of inadequacy, failure, regret, and lost hope in his desire to make the "right" decision. He doesn’t want to hurt either man, but in the end he can only be with one of them.

Snyder’s descriptions of Marcus’ struggle are powerful and intense, capturing with words the anguish and deep emotions which are engulfing him. Some of my favorite passages, which relate so much with so few words, are:

“I’m caught in the middle, because despite the way I feel for one, I can’t help but want the other.”

“I love who I think he could be, and that’s not something I’m ready to throw away just yet.”

“He just doesn’t see me, he can’t, he won’t…”

I was captured by Marcus from the beginning and I was on edge about what would happen until the very end. It was so easy to identify with the character, whose heart and soul are spilled across every page. At the same time, I was drawn to both Kent and Luke, never completely sure who was the right person for Marcus to be with.

Cowboy is very different from many of Snyder’s others stories. It focuses on a painful emotional journey, which results in a gripping story that should not be missed. If you are a fan of Snyder’s work, be sure to read this story to fully realize the range of her talent.
40 reviews
June 16, 2016
This is a book that is what it is. Nothing more, nothing less. It's a porno, people.

I enjoyed it immensely.

This is not the sort of book you read for plot; you read it because you'd like something to get off to. The plot is minimal, and is exactly what it says in the blurb: will Marcus have sex with this adorable barely-legal, or not? If you're looking for more, look elsewhere.

That said, the sex scenes were beyond hot. Luke was adorable, Marcus told the story well, and the reader was free to cheer him towards the wonderful Luke and away from the disgusting Kent. Yes, Marcus is a bit of a twit, but it's not a long enough book for that to actually get annoying. It's a melodrama complete with a black hat on the bad guy. Seriously, that's what this is, and it's delightful. Do you know why?

This is the first Snyder book I've read, but let me take a moment to speculate that when this particular author does a book where the plot is more than "fuck him or not," the writing is even better done than it was in this book, and it was well done here. I have high standards--check my reviews. The phrasing was to the point yet pleasing, the details just enough.

My one gripe?



Still, it's definitely a book with enough scenes that I'll revisit that frankly, I don't care if the ending was a little quick. It does what it says on the package and it does it well. If you're looking for sexy MM wank fodder, this is your book--and I mean that in the best of ways.
Profile Image for Kathy.
215 reviews5 followers
November 1, 2009
4.5 stars J.M. Snyder's Cowboy is a wonderful story about a young man who's lived so long looking for one thing that when the real thing comes into his life he's torn between what's familiar and what he wants.
* * *
As the story progressed I became more and more drawn into Marcus' life and dilemma, but at first I found the story somewhat slow going. This is not a story with any action at all; it's very much a character-driven plot and a lot of coming to terms with one's life and one's choices. But I do have to admit that, by the end, I was firmly involved with Marcus, Luke and Kent.

At the beginning of the story (the self-published one which is, sadly, no longer available as a free story) J.M. Snyder writes:

"This story was posted in parts on my website, http://jmsnyder.net/ in 2004. At the time, I didn't have a satisfactory ending. I sort of wavered on which one of the guys (Kent or Luke) that Marcus should end up with. In the original version of the story, the ending just sort of petered out in an unsatisfactory way. As I really like the story and the characters within, and can sympathize with all of them, I didn't know how to wrap things up without hurting someone. Then I decided to post the story online and take a vote among my readers to see how it would end. Here is the result."

Profile Image for Cathy Brockman.
Author 5 books95 followers
April 30, 2013
Marcus has an obsession with cowboys when one day he was hitching he saw Kent and fell in love at once. After two years of living with Kent he found he wasn’t Mr. perfect or the image he and everyone else see when they look at him but he still loved him. One day he found a young runaway n the barn that was also the perfect image of what he was looking for and he also wanted Marcus, He was offering Marcus touches and love like Kent would never offer.
This was a very lovely heart-wrenching story of a young man that knows what he wants, thinks he found it but has something missing. His life is far from storybook yet his fantasies are very storybook romance, and boy does he have some hot fantasies and dreams. When he meets Luke the story goes into Marcus’ being torn between the new hot man and the older man he thought he loved but was disgusted by as well. I could just feel his heartache and pain and confusion. The only thing I would have liked to see more of Kent, why he drank so much, why he didn’t offer Marcus the love and sexual fulfillment he needed and why he was like he is in general. I liked the twist ending, it came as a slight surprise and I would have liked to seen this elaborated more on also. What a great story
Recommendations: If you like hot cowboys, older men, flowers, farmers markets, runaways, angst, heartbreak, very hot sex, this one is for you!
Profile Image for Debbie .
548 reviews43 followers
January 20, 2010
When Marcus headed out west two years ago, he knew what he was looking for. A cowboy like Kent seemed to be exactly what he was after, as long as he could overlook Kent’s drinking, the unsatisfying love life and his quiet demeanor. Content if not completely satisfied with his own life, he took in the boy (Lucas) he had found in the barn and learned all the things that his relationship with Kent had been missing.

Hasn’t everyone had times of feeling underappreciated or overlooked, but J.M. Snyder has a way of putting it into a story that makes the normal seem so obviously wrong. The emotional drama and self abuse that occurs with this kind of relationship was put under a microscope and the way this one was resolved, while it’s a nice happy ending (sorry if it’s a bit of a spoiler), is a bit unrealistic. Still it was enjoyable to read the inner torments of Marcus in his search for the perfect love.
Profile Image for Alexis Woods.
Author 52 books84 followers
February 8, 2016
I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed this story. Written in an almost stream of conciousness, first person POV, we follow along inside the mind of Marcus, a man who opted to find his "Cowboy" and ends up working, living, and sometimes loving Kent. Kent owns a road side market, but he's more interested in his alcohol and flowers than he is in a relationship with Marcus. When Marcus finds 21 year old Luke sleeping in the barn, attraction and affection find a sure home within Marcus, and he has to decide on who he loves more...the man who takes care of him, or the man who loves him.

The story took some twists that I wasn't expecting, and kept me interested right through the end.
Profile Image for Mara Ismine.
Author 24 books20 followers
January 30, 2010
I wasn't sure if I liked this as I was reading it, most of the way through until near the end. The story develops slowly, changing and evolving as it does. It is first person and most of it is Marcus' internal dialogue and memories. It really addresses the age old questions of 'what is love?' and 'how do I recognise love when I find it?'. Marcus is very realistic as he confronts these questions and comes to some resolution with an almost bitter-sweet happy ending. That might be HEA oe HFN at the point the story finishes, but there was no doubt in my mind that Marcus made the right decision.
Profile Image for Gavin Stephenson-Jackman.
1,673 reviews
July 31, 2012
I was somehow hoping for an ending that would have seen Kent, Marcus, and Luke coming to some mutually beneficial relationship but Kent's near total lack of emotion in his relationship with Marcus for two years also made the conclusion not unexpected.

A good read that satisfied my penchant for Cowboys for the time being. The burning heat between Marcus and Luke is a definite contrast to the purely sexual function of the relationship between Marcus and Kent. The strong silent type is certainly the stereo type for the Cowboy but it can make relationships very difficult.
Profile Image for Kay.
1,934 reviews124 followers
July 23, 2016
This gay romance by J. M. Snyder didn't quite grab me like some of his other stories. There's some cheating in this one that though it's part of the new love found, the lies didn't sit with me. Still a good read.

Note: Written in first person point of view (Marcus)
Profile Image for Navyvet.
128 reviews2 followers
May 13, 2010
Just didn't care for this depressing story. Plus, I can't stand 1st person POV in M/M romance fiction, but that's just me.
922 reviews7 followers
February 8, 2016
Not sure about this book. Not bad but not my kind of read.
Profile Image for Elaine.
1,446 reviews16 followers
February 27, 2016
I loved this story. It was well written, with a good story line. I enjoyed it very much.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews

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