Every Family Has A Story: How we inherit love and loss

by Julia Samuel

Relationships fundamentally influence our health and happiness -- and family is the only relationship that we cannot leave, however much we might like to. But we think too narrowly about the impact of our families on our lives.

On Families sees bestselling psychotherapist Julia Samuel turn from her work with individuals to sessions with a wide variety of families. Diving deep into eight case studies, with her usual storytelling panache and the latest academic research, she analyses a range of common issues including separation, step-relationships, leaving home, trauma and loss. In doing so, she reveals insightfully how deeply we are influenced by our families -- including the often under-appreciated impact of grandparents and siblings -- and offers universally applicable insights into how families can face challenges together. Her 12 touchstones for family wellbeing -- from fighting productively to making time for rituals, and from setting boundaries to allowing difference -- provide us with the tools to ultimately be better family members ourselves.

Revealing forgiveness and learning amidst trauma and hardship, this is an honest and compassionate meditation on what we inherit and how we can create the families we wish for.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Self Help, Parenting, Counselling, Mental Health, Personal Development

320 pages, Hardcover

Published March 17, 2022

About the author

Julia Samuel is a grief psychotherapist who works with bereaved families, both in private practice and at St. Mary's Paddington Hospital in London. She is the founder of the charity Child Bereavement UK. Grief Works is her first book.

Reviews

[Paromjit · Rating 5 out of 5]

There is nothing I am more curious and fascinated by than families, and I can't help but compare and contrast what I see and know about other families with the messy and chaotic nature of my own family. Family is the subject of psychotherapist Julia Samuel’s latest book, it is the basic building block of society's structures, many may believe that families provide love, care, safety and security, there to insulate its members against the madness and dangers of the real world. In truth, families can be so much more complicated, more problematic and with their own peculiar dysfunctions that may include violence, neglect, and abuse. Families have their own family systems, those who hold power, the roles played within, intergenerational traumas that are never acknowledged or talked about, irrationalities, containing closely held secrets and silences that inhibit the ability to be open and address issues. Here the goal is to address some of those issues, so that in the future, family dynamics have the potential to become healthier, resulting in its members becoming more resilient and stable.

In short, families can be a real hornet's nest, with sore spots that can hold real and unbearable pain when touched, they can be dark places which fester, and can generate hostility and danger if those specific sore spots are raised. Unfortunately the pain must be faced in order to move on and change the script for the future. Samuels gives us the case studies of 8 families she was involved with during the pandemic, primarily through zoom, each distinct in their own right, and aiming to confront the different problems and challenges they want to address. I became completely immersed in the individuals and their families, their stories make for riveting and compulsive reading, covering issues such as biological parents, adoption, loss, suicide, empty nests, leaving home, and class and wealth provide no immunity when it comes to family dysfunctions.

Samuel anonymises her clients, providing composites of individuals, and she is very human in acknowledging when she is taking on issues and people with whom she has limited, if any, experience and she is upfront about not always knowing what the way forward might be. She highlights that the most damaged families have rigid and fixed notions of right and wrong, where communications are closed down, leaving family members feeling distressed, abandoned and trapped, such families are the least likely to seek external help and advice. Samuels provides clarity and insight into the state of the many forms of family that exist in our contemporary society, giving us some of the latest academic research, and offers invaluable advice in creating healthier family dynamics with her 12 touchstones for families. An eye opening read that has made me a fan of family therapy, this is a book that I cannot recommend highly enough. Many thanks to the publisher for an ARC.

[Simona · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stodama į bakalauro studijas pirmoje vietoje įrašiau istoriją, antroje - psichologiją. Studijavau istoriją. Baigus trūko psichologijos, magistre pasirinkau dvasinį konsultavimą, kuriame 50/50 buvo religijos ir psichologijos. Bet vis grįžta mintys, kad gal dar kada tą gryną psichologiją pastudijuosiu. Nes aš tikiu sąmoningo būvimo gyvenime galia tą gyvenimą keisti. Ir dar, matyt, atėjusi iš nestabilios, skilusios šeimos, nešuos kraitelį su savim, tokį, kuris pačiai nepatinka, tokį, kurį vis reikia pakoreguot, pasitaisyt, patuštint, įdėt į jį naujų minčių ir elgesio modelių.

Tiesiogiai su psichologija susijusias knygas aš skaitau, kaip terapiją ir pagalbą sau. Ir šią skaityti man buvo emociškai sunku. Vienoje iš istorijų radau daug panašumų ir skaudėjo už juos ir už save. Bet pats procesas džiugina, kai tokiu būdu gali permąstyt save, naujai, iš kito kampo pamatyt situacijas, o perėjus viską pasijaučiu lengvesnė. 💛

Autorė knygoje sudėjo skirtingas šeimas ir jų patirtis. Džiaugsmus, stiprybes, silpnumus ir nuoskaudas. Žavėjo jos pačios empatija ir žmogiškumas. Kiekvienoje istorijoje radau ir ją pačią, jai kylančius jausmus ir kūno pojūčius. Toks dalyvavimas sesijose pasirodė labai jautrus, pakeliantis, palaikantis ir kuriantis ryšį.

Kita, vis dažniau knygose mane atrandanti tema yra karantinas! Ta universali pasaulio patirtis jos metu! Ir, tiesą pasakius, aš tarsi vis laukiau, ką psichologai tirs ir kalbės apie pandemijos įtakas ir poveikius. Ši dalis buvo labai įdomi, nors jai skirtas foninis, antraeilis dėmesys. 💛

Psichologines knygas, su tais jautriaisiais taškais, kuriuos mes su savim nėšiojamės, reikėtų skaityti profilaktiškai, kaip pagalbą sau. Vėl ir vėl. Ir ši knyga mane gydė ir lietė. Nes kiekviena šeima turi savą istoriją, o maniškę permastyt iš naujo skaudėjo, bet buvo naudinga.

"Tai man parodė, kad net ir suaugus tėvai mums yra nepaprastai svarbūs, o tai, manau, dažnai lieka neįvertinta. Prasti santykiai su jais brangiai kainuoj. Jie yra mūsų dalis. Mums jų nereikia, kad išgyventume, kaip reikėjo vaikystėje, [...] jie mums reikalingi, kad klestėtume."

[Victoria · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great read. I really enjoyed the diversity of the case studies, and took away something from each that has helped me understand myself and my situations a bit better. Explorative, insightful, and the conclusion was great.

[Andrius Baležentis · Rating 4 out of 5]

Knyga atveria gana naują psichologijos kryptį, kurioje žvilgsnis nukreipiamas ne į pavienį žmogų ar poros dinamiką, o į visą šeimos audinį. Tai tarsi bandymas pamatyti, kokiais siūlais mes esame surišti, kaip praeities mazgai keliauja iš kartos į kartą, ir kokią tyliai veikiančią įtaką jie daro mūsų dabartiniams santykiams.

Skaitant istorijas, sunku išvengti paralelių su savimi. Kiekvienas skyrius tampa savitu priminimu, kad mūsų asmeninės problemos neatsirado vakuume – jos persmelktos giminės balsų, nutylėtų traumų, kartais net atsitiktinių pasirinkimų, paveldėtų kaip šešėlis. Tame yra ir atpažinimo džiaugsmo, ir šiek tiek nerimo.

Tik knygos pabaiga paliko prieštaringą įspūdį. Paskutinė istorija, ko gero, pati jautriausia ir labiausiai išsiskirianti, nutrūksta lyg nebaigtas sakinys. Autorė net prisipažįsta, kad yra spaudžiama terminų atima iš skaitytojo progą iki galo išgyventi tai, kas pradėta.

Nepaisant šio skubotumo, Samuel knyga yra vertinga: ji padeda pažvelgti į save iš naujo kampo, pripažinti, kad šeimos istorija – tai ne tik praeitis, bet ir šiandiena, kurią nešiojamės savyje.

[Lena · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an amazing book! As a therapist to be this gave me such interesting insights, but also as a daughter and partner, part of a family it gave me valuable tips and knowledge. So well written. Highlighted so much! I will take this book with me through the therapy I will provide. Thank you Julia, on to Grief Works

[Vaish · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think case studies are always worthwhile reading. I knew most theories which were described in the book (which is always nice to be reminded of), but every story of every person, or every family in this case, is different and simultaneously has some recognisable parts to it. The fact that these stories were about entire generations made it really interesting and heartwarming.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fascinating book on two levels.
The family situations and how Samuel deals with them is one level. But, for me, showing how she uses supervision and faces up to her own potential triggers and biases was really fascinating.
I know counselling is different to coaching but some of the skills, tools and ethics are transferable.
I get a lot out of my supervision and I think this book demonstrated how to get even more out of it.

[Richard Bridge · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who has gone through significant turmoil in my family life with my parents, I found this a really insightful book and has persuaded me that it may be beneficial to consider some psychotherapy, and potentially even family therapy - although perhaps it is too late for that (apparently it's never too late).

Julia Samuel provides a really helpful introduction to therapy and provides perhaps what may best be called eight or nine anonymised case studies. I was able to learn something from nearly everyone of those case studies but whilst Samuel is always open and honest about that she is not the solution to everything, is always learning, uses supervision as a good therapist should do, I did however feel that there was a sense of judgment as she approached her case studies. She admits as much for instance when acknowledging she has 'issues of control' that need to be dealt with.

Of course, if one is reflexive and honest, we always hold views that are difficult to shake off but surely therapy is about active listening and approaching a non-judgmental stance. There are clear examples of a somewhat paternalistic approach and moreover there is nothing within the book that reflects how families access her services, what her fees are and whether that means as a necessity she excludes certain (lower income) families. That sits awkwardly for me as trauma is perhaps disproportionately encountered by those who have poor housing, no or low incomes, have encountered difficulties in the Armed Services and so forth. Indeed, there is no rationale as to why she chose the families that she did.

She also makes some problematic assumptions - for instance that children leave home and transition to adulthood when mothers are going through similar stages of life (i.e. menopause). She speaks of a grandparent as follows: 'she worked as a carer, lived on a council estate BUT had huge glamour, the way she dressed.' The but reflects a classed attitude that seems to imply living on a council estate or being a carer precludes glamour. She speaks elsewhere of marrying very young 'which meant she leant too much on her parents', again suggesting that leaning on parents is only something young mothers may do (or do more often).

I also found it awkward when she told clients 'what a wonderful son' he was. Perhaps that would work with some clients but for others, I feel there is a need for authenticity; after all, can any therapist honestly know whether a grown adult has been a 'wonderful son' from a few therapy sessions?

But that is perhaps me being overly critical (and part of the therapy I need is surely to forgive more). So whilst she may not be the ideal therapist for me, she certainly reinforced and made me feel some of my own issues were valid. I leave you with a couple of sentences which I take away

'Above all, they wanted the truth - all of their different truths ... we succeed as human beings by having a narrative, a story we can tell ourselves about what has happened'.

[Taggie Edmondes · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5-4 I would say for this book. Type of book I didn’t read in one go but would read different chapters at a time. I’ve listened to Julia samuels a lot on podcasts and really like her thoughts. This book was good, some chapters better then others and some that were a little triggering and sad for me. It’s such a basic topic but an interesting insight into families and how diverse/complex, but also how common issues can be. I liked how she picked families she didn’t know well to reveal how their culture / history impacted or manifested certain issues. I’m not sure how I’d feel myself having family therapy so kudos to those families, I think mine would find it extremely difficult.

[Calvin Caulee · Rating 4 out of 5]

Family is a fascinating topic. With the constant shift in dynamics, emotions and roles. There is much to learn. Every family has its own issues but some are deeper than the others, some have more devastating outcomes than others. Julia Samuel talked about a few cases, each unique with the issues presented. But all had this in common. Without love and a willingness to makes thing better, nothing will help repair those cracks in your relationships. Each case offered quite a unique outlook on issues that might affect a family. However I would've liked a bit more personal input from the author. Quite a good read though

[Gael Browne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really lovely book - enjoyed some chapters more than others, which is to be expected as certain things resonate personally. I personally found the intro and conclusion very informative and helpful, aside from the case studies.

I love the simple truth, that ‘Love is not a soft skill. In a family, nothing is more important, and nothing is as hard.’

[Emma · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book took me an extremely long time to get through, as I was underlining bits of it and taking it one chunk at a time. It was a powerful read and an important one to develop more knowledge about families and the dynamics within them.
It was triggering in places but I really enjoyed it and feel I’ve learnt some really insightful things that match up with the work I’ve been doing with figuring out my family and where I fit within it.

[Nazlıcan · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Travmanın dili yoktur. Travmanın zaman kavramı da yoktur. Travma, yaşandığı andan on yıllar sonra tekrar alevlenmek üzere hep vücudumuzda teyakkuzda bekler. Duyguların işlenmesine asla müsaade etmez. Benim için ise, yapbozun birçok parçasının kayıp olduğu anlamına gelir.

[HMCNijssen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heldere en interessant beschreven casuïstiek. Zeker herkenbaarheid voor wie het betreft. Geschreven met compassie voor de verhalen van de families. Love conquers all, en natuurlijk ook de bereidheid om de 'systemen' onder de loep te nemen en te bespreken als een continue proces.

[Jonas Moonstomper · Rating 4 out of 5]

Labai skirtingos šeimos, bet problemos tokios panašios

[Jude Swift · Rating 5 out of 5]

A truly fantastic read. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

[Ceit · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the familial stories. Hit me at an opportune time. Nice to witness the growth of the individuals and adjust the expectation of the reader that all will be resolved by the end. Inspires me to read some of her other books now.

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every Story has a Family, 9 April 2022

This was a very interesting book. I am a big proponent of Therapy For Everybody, but family therapy seems to play second fiddle to individual – presumably because of how hard it is to get a group of potentially therapy-averse people around one table. I will say the fact that Samuels is attempting to be inclusive of many different types and varieties of families means that some specificity is lost. This is coming from a place of extreme privilege wherein I do not experience racism or homophobia, nor do I have significant traumas in my past. However, I still have mental health struggles, so the books that speak to me the most are the ones who deal with people like me – people who from the outside look like they shouldn’t have problems. All the same, this is still a valuable book with actionable insights.

‘We may not see our family, but they are still part of us, genetically, in our memories and our unconscious. We can never leave them, as we can a partner or a friendship.’

‘I knew the theory that when a traumatic event isn’t addressed and processed in one generation it continues through the generations until someone is prepared to feel the pain.’

This is a concept I learned only recently, but it makes so much sense.

‘This is a paradox I often witness: as long as people are unaware of the impact of their past, they often find themselves re- enacting elements of it, rather than making conscious choices that would work better for them.’

‘It is how parents live, far more than what they say, that becomes embedded in their children. I have often witnessed parents saying to their children, ‘All I want is for you to be happy,’ but how would the child begin to know what ‘happy’ looks like if they haven’t seen it?’

OOF.

‘[...] the power of naming pain: it didn’t kill them. Instead it led to healing.’

‘‘Is this a worry I can turn into a problem to solve?’ For example, I can deal with a worry such as whether there is a meeting tomorrow by checking with a colleague. Or, is it a might- not- happen worry, which may never come to fruition but may utterly consume you and your day, such as is your child safe? In those cases, she advises us to write it down and move it to your ‘worry- curfew’ list. She proposes you set aside a worry curfew of thirty minutes a day, at a set time, to look at the list and worry all you like. But when a worry pops into your head outside curfew time, distract yourself with positive activities, like chatting to a friend or doing a specific task. Finally, when you’re in the worry- curfew slot, cross out what is no longer a worry, tear up the old list, and throw it away, then jot down on a fresh sheet what continues to worry you for the next day’s session.’

I LOVE THIS.

‘When something bad happens I will not let go of that bad thing until I find the blessing within it.’

Ah, #goals.

‘I’d like parents to examine themselves and recognize the impact of their behaviour, take responsibility for it and change it if necessary. An apology as sincere and heartfelt as Archie’s can go a long way to heal injuries from the past.’

Truth bomb.

‘Know your own Jaws music, which sends you into overdrive quicker than you can say, ‘Pause.’ This is not easy and is a lifelong process. You can begin by being aware of the chatter in your mind, what I call your ‘shitty committee’. Write down what you are saying to yourself. Begin to notice the triggers that send you into high alert. Is it a particular look, a sound or a feeling? Name them. Perhaps you can find a way to express them.’

‘Love is not a soft skill. In a family, nothing is more important, and nothing is as hard.’

[Gijs Limonard · Rating 4 out of 5]

3,5 stars; Stories told by a psychoanalist, in the form of 8 case studies of families, each with their own issues. Real life experiences told well, but missed the deep analytical part; the narrative mainly remains at the level of events and too sparingly dives into the inner workings of family dynamics.

[Simon Lee · Rating 4 out of 5]

A useful and insightful book both for counsellors and anybody working professionally with families, loss and bereavement. There are some very relevant observations and also some serious food for thought with regards our own upbringing and family structures, too.

[Ingrid C · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm not a fan of reading book summaries; I prefer to know very little about a book before diving in. My selection process usually relies on recommendations from authors, podcasters, or experts in topics that pique my curiosity.

If I recall correctly, this book was mentioned in Esther Perel's newsletter, and its title immediately caught my attention. This year, I've been delving into novels that explore the intricacies of family dynamics, so I felt it was the perfect time to explore a nonfiction book on the subject.

The book delves into the stories of eight different families and how therapy, guided by the author, helped them navigate their conflicts. I must admit, the first family case didn't captivate me as much. It's not that there was anything wrong with them, but their circumstances were so distinct from my own that it was challenging to relate. Interestingly, I stumbled upon an article on Austin Kleon's website that encouraged being curious about what you're not curious about, and that mindset became my mantra while reading this book.

I believe this book will be particularly valuable to other therapists. The author does an excellent job of sharing her own limitations in dealing with conflicts that were unfamiliar to her. She openly discusses her desire to comfort clients in ways that may not be common for other therapists.

As mentioned in other reviews, the book presents a wealth of research and statistics that aid in understanding the points it seeks to make. However, I found myself more captivated by the personal stories than the psychological aspects of their conflicts and dynamics.

One aspect of the book that I truly appreciated was the closing paragraphs of each chapter. I liked that there wasn't always a neatly wrapped-up happy ending. By no means do I imply that I wished for negative outcomes, but I believe the book effectively conveys realistic expectations of therapy. It reminds readers that engaging in group therapy or any form of therapy doesn't guarantee that all problems will vanish. Instead, therapy serves as a means to transcend conflicts rather than eradicate them.

In the end, I still don’t think I was the target reader of this book but I believe it offers valuable insights, particularly for therapists, and provides a nuanced understanding of the complexities within families.

[Val Robson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having read Julia Samuel's previous book about grief I had high hopes for this book and was not disappointed. She has a remarkable gift of getting to the nub of issues and being able to communicate to the persons involved how best to move forward to improve their mental health and happiness. Doing this for multiple family members simultaneously and also writing it all down in a clear and helpful book within months of meeting the families is extremely impressive. Her introduction where she explains about the advantages of these family group sessions having to go online due to the covid pandemic is fascinating.

Julia recounts the experience of eight families with issues in this book. Their details have been changed enough to anonymise the families and the eight experiences can be read in any order. I recommend this book to any reader who has a less than perfect family. I can relate to experiences in many of the different stories and just wish my extended family could all meet up with Julia Samuels on a Zoom call to benefit from her experience and wisdom. An easy five stars.

With thanks to NetGalley and Penguin Random House for a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Adrienne Cullen-Morgan · Rating 4 out of 5]

The subject of families is a very complicated one and one with which Julia Samuels deals very well. She presents 8 different case histories of patients and attempts to sort out their problems in so far as she can. Most families I know are more complicated than those in the book with sibling rivalries, jealousy, members not always loving each other etc. I think a great deal of families are more dysfunctional than those outlined in this excellent book. It does bring the topic of families up to date however, with a gay couple etc. I enjoyed reading it but she did not touch of topics dear to my heart which were never resolved in my own family. I heard her being interviewed and in that interview I felt she hit the nail on the head when it came to my family. That is why I purchased the book. However, there is no mention of the topic she brought up at interview in the book. A very good read however.

[Jade · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked this book a lot and found it useful personally and in the work I do with my own clients in mental health. It was sensitive, nuanced and catered for a varied audience.

The only slight irk I felt was that family therapy was recommended at the back of the book without addressing that this *isn't* a good idea if one of the individuals involved is possibly a narcissist.

I don't mean that word in a perjortive sense but just in the sense that therapy will often make things worst rather than better for the others in this dynamic. Archie's story highlighted such a dynamic (with his mother) and though I think not using the word narcissistic is sometimes wise for various reasons, I think it's something that should have been mentioned to avoid confusion in this book especially in the afterword recommending family therapy for readers. It could save a lot of heartache and at least initiate readers in this dynamic to do further research to protect themselves.

[Carrie Carter · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such an interesting collection of case studies from family therapy sessions! Our quirks, habits, attitudes, and even trauma go back so much further than us, or even our parents; they are literally written into our DNA based on the experiences of our grandparents and great-grandparents.

At the end, there are tips to keep your family's well-being intact, and from tip 11 comes my favorite quote of the entire book:

"Handle your feelings before they handle you. Remember, emotional systems don't function logically: find ways to process strong emotions you may be feeling, to centre yourself before you communicate what is important to you. Know your strengths and vulnerabilities. Know your own "Jaws" music, which sends you into overdrive before you can say, "Pause." This is not easy and a lifelong process."

My challenge after finishing is wrapped up in this question: How I can become the healthy and whole person my great-grandchildren need me to be?

[Oana Lambrache · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Fiecare familie are o poveste. O poveste despre iubire și pierdere, bucurie și durere."

Prin intermediul poveștilor despre 8 familii, autoarea își propune să descrie și să analizeze legăturile dintre membrii fiecărei familii, dar și modul în care traumele transgeneraționale pot fi vindecate prin intermediul terapiei. Cred că cel mai important pas spre vindecare a fost dorința și implicarea familiilor sau a majorității membrilor unei familii în procesul terapeutic. Odată hotărâți și convinși că terapia este calea spre liniștea după care tânjeau, pacienții s-au eliberat de prejudecăți, suferințe, greutăți, pe care le duceau cu ei de mult prea mult timp și au clădit legături puternice și sincere cu ei înșiși și cu familiile lor.

Familia este un organism dinamic și relațiile dintre membrii ei nu sunt perfecte, iar cartea Juliei Samuel exact asta reușește să ne arate - familia în toată vuonerabilitatea ei, cu problemele ei, cu neînțelegeri și certuri, dar și cu momente de onestitate și recunoaștere a vinei, cu momente de iertare și împăcare.

"Puterea de a schimba povestea familiei voastre începe în mintea voastră. Faptul de a vă imagina familia pe care vă doriți să o aveți este primul pas pentru ca aceasta să devină noua voastră realitate."

[Rudi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bij sommige verhalen kon ik iets meer meeleven (voelen) dan bij andere , hoeveel invloed (richting,) familie precies bepaald weet ik niet , maar als ik wat rondkijk naar families vallen , hobby’s, sporten (supporters) , werk , religie, ook erfelijke ziekten, enz , toch wat samen en is de invloed van de familie waar je geboren bent niet gering.
Er wordt (terecht) ook wat reclame gemaakt voor de psychotherapie, voor pillen wordt er anders ook reclame gemaakt , wat bij sommige zal het beter werken dan voor anderen, ... zolang er geen al te dure woorden/ oren gebruikt worden kunnen waarschijnlijk velen er wat levenskwaliteit uithalen .
De conclusies vond ik leerrijk !

[Tina Price · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to Netgalley for the opportunity to read and review this book. This is a thoughtfully factual account of the work of a counsellor, using anonymous case studies from her own practice. There is always interest in reading about the work of a professional and this is no exception. We are led into the lives of families, given the opportunity to read about the experiences and reactions of family members and then led through the responses of the counsellor. A simple, thoughtful structure, detailed and carefully referenced. A range of situations are explored and there us much to be learned from this work. Well worth reading.

[Tracey Ellis · Rating 4 out of 5]

A must read for anyone navigating family issues, and we all are at some point in our lives. Initially I thought I wouldn’t find reading about such different family situations relatable, yet I connected to each case study in some way. Emotions of humanity are complex, as are families, so managing these interpersonal connections can be challenging, but the author does it with grace and empathy through her therapy, learning things herself along the way. Each case study was fascinating and heart-rendering, something to learn from each family. I’ll be reading more of this author, as and when needed.

[Christina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this book! The author guides through case studies of families that she had seen and consented to having their cases published. The stories offer great depth and variety. It is written in a focused and compassiote manner and informs on the therapists thinking process. It is written in a lively, yet informative and deeply personal way.
Every case had something compelling to offer for everyone, I found.
I wish these kinds of books were bestselling books, versus the millionth book on self improvement...
This is what truly matters in life, which is what people and families do to overcome challenges which life inevitably will serve everyone.