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Tough: My Journey to True Power
From Brooklyn Nine-Nine star Terry Crews, the deeply personal story of his lifelong obsession with strength--and how, after looking for it in all the wrong places, he finally found it
Terry Crews spent decades cultivating his bodybuilder physique and bravado. On the outside, he seemed invincible: he escaped his abusive father, went pro in the NFL, and broke into the glamorous world of Hollywood. But his fixation with appearing outwardly tough eventually turned into an exhausting performance in which repressing his emotions let them get the better of him--leading him into addiction and threatening the most important relationships in his life.
Now Crews is sharing the raw, never-before-told story of his quest to find the true meaning of toughness. In Tough, he examines arenas of life where he desperately sought control--masculinity, shame, sex, experiences with racism, and relationships--and recounts the setbacks and victories he faced while uprooting deeply ingrained toxic masculinity and finally confronting his insecurities, painful memories, and limiting beliefs. The result is not only the gripping story of a man's struggle against himself and how he finally got his mind right, but a bold indictment of the cultural norms and taboos that ask men to be outwardly tough while leaving them inwardly weak.
With Tough, Crews's journey of transformation offers a model for anyone who considers themselves a "tough guy" but feels unfulfilled; anyone struggling with procrastination or self-sabotage; and anyone ready to achieve true, lasting self-mastery.
Terry Crews spent decades cultivating his bodybuilder physique and bravado. On the outside, he seemed invincible: he escaped his abusive father, went pro in the NFL, and broke into the glamorous world of Hollywood. But his fixation with appearing outwardly tough eventually turned into an exhausting performance in which repressing his emotions let them get the better of him--leading him into addiction and threatening the most important relationships in his life.
Now Crews is sharing the raw, never-before-told story of his quest to find the true meaning of toughness. In Tough, he examines arenas of life where he desperately sought control--masculinity, shame, sex, experiences with racism, and relationships--and recounts the setbacks and victories he faced while uprooting deeply ingrained toxic masculinity and finally confronting his insecurities, painful memories, and limiting beliefs. The result is not only the gripping story of a man's struggle against himself and how he finally got his mind right, but a bold indictment of the cultural norms and taboos that ask men to be outwardly tough while leaving them inwardly weak.
With Tough, Crews's journey of transformation offers a model for anyone who considers themselves a "tough guy" but feels unfulfilled; anyone struggling with procrastination or self-sabotage; and anyone ready to achieve true, lasting self-mastery.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published April 26, 2022
147 people are currently reading
2623 people want to read
About the author
Terry Crews
10 books91 followersTerry Alan Crews (born July 30, 1968) is an American actor and former American football player. He is best known for playing Julius on the UPN/CW sitcom Everybody Hates Chris, Sergeant Terry Jeffords on the NBC comedy Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and for his appearances in Old Spice commercials, as well as films such as Friday After Next, Idiocracy, and The Expendables series. He is a host of America's Got Talent.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 379 reviews
April 28, 2022
I really liked this book by Terry Crews. There were a lot of good stories. I felt the author was very honest about their life and experiences. Highly recommended 👌
June 8, 2022
My interest in this book was sparked by a recent interview with Crews on the Daily Show. I know who he is mostly from the few times that I've watched America's Got Talent. My general impression was of a nice, friendly, talented guy. I was vaguely aware that he'd been on other shows and in movies over the years, but nothing I'd actually seen. Anyway, he seemed like a decent and interesting person, and the interview got me curious about the book. So here we are.
The book was fascinating. It jumps around a bit in time though. It begins in conventional autobiography fashion with his childhood in Flint, MI. But then, only about a fifth of the way through the book, it follows the story to adulthood. The chapter ends, and we get a new section title before the next chapter, and then it's childood-to-adulthood again, but following a different thread, one that's also part of his personality. The book is split into five parts, each focusing on a different theme. But they're all different facets of the same man. It's an interesting structure, one I don't think I've seen in an autobiography before. Once you get what's going on, it works very well. And the result is what feels like a much clearer picture of the man than is typical with such books.
I'm glad I read this. Recommended!
The book was fascinating. It jumps around a bit in time though. It begins in conventional autobiography fashion with his childhood in Flint, MI. But then, only about a fifth of the way through the book, it follows the story to adulthood. The chapter ends, and we get a new section title before the next chapter, and then it's childood-to-adulthood again, but following a different thread, one that's also part of his personality. The book is split into five parts, each focusing on a different theme. But they're all different facets of the same man. It's an interesting structure, one I don't think I've seen in an autobiography before. Once you get what's going on, it works very well. And the result is what feels like a much clearer picture of the man than is typical with such books.
I'm glad I read this. Recommended!
May 11, 2022
Wow! I couldn't put this one down! Celebrity memoirs tend to be tame affairs, but not this one. Crews is painfully, bluntly, vividly honest about his faults and mistakes in life, confessing some scary stuff so he can show us how he's grown.
Not surprisingly, the "toughness" that he touts in the title isn't about his giant muscles, it's about learning self control, the ability to rein in his temper and appetites.
Crews shares one story after another about how he was surrounded by moral failure as a young man, became a moral failure himself, and slowly--one area of life at a time--became a better man, a man that his wife and children could be proud of.
Everyone should read this book, but especially every man.
I choked up a bit on page 229, not because it was sad, but because it was triumphant.
Crews's observations about racism, sexism, and human nature--all drawn naturally from his experiences--are genuinely thoughtful and productive. I wish we had more people just like him.
I also wish that he'd said a bit more about his faith, although he does have a few fascinating pages about how he's been blessed by observing the Biblical principle of tithing. Crews escaped some toxic, hypocritical cults from his childhood, and I'd love to know more about how he kept his faith intact when so many these days don't.
But that might be beyond the scope of what he was doing here. As it is, this book was inspiring and eye opening, without being self righteous or preachy. This is a man who just tells it like it was and like it is. The value of his story speaks for itself--he doesn't need to waste time controlling his image or selling himself to us.
Now that's tough!
Not surprisingly, the "toughness" that he touts in the title isn't about his giant muscles, it's about learning self control, the ability to rein in his temper and appetites.
Crews shares one story after another about how he was surrounded by moral failure as a young man, became a moral failure himself, and slowly--one area of life at a time--became a better man, a man that his wife and children could be proud of.
Everyone should read this book, but especially every man.
I choked up a bit on page 229, not because it was sad, but because it was triumphant.
Crews's observations about racism, sexism, and human nature--all drawn naturally from his experiences--are genuinely thoughtful and productive. I wish we had more people just like him.
I also wish that he'd said a bit more about his faith, although he does have a few fascinating pages about how he's been blessed by observing the Biblical principle of tithing. Crews escaped some toxic, hypocritical cults from his childhood, and I'd love to know more about how he kept his faith intact when so many these days don't.
But that might be beyond the scope of what he was doing here. As it is, this book was inspiring and eye opening, without being self righteous or preachy. This is a man who just tells it like it was and like it is. The value of his story speaks for itself--he doesn't need to waste time controlling his image or selling himself to us.
Now that's tough!
March 14, 2024
After watching the interview of Terry Crews by Shannon Sharp, I decided to read his memoir. Just like the interview the memoir did not disappoint. I have a new respect for Terry Crews, not only as an actor, but a man of God, a free thinker, and a family man. May he continue to be blessed.
July 14, 2022
This man must be protected at all costs.
“It was seven years of a nomadic warrior lifestyle, and what I learned as I moved from team to team was that there were very few people I could talk to or trust. During those seven years, I played with literally hundreds of guys, and out of those hundreds of guys, I'd say five of them became true friends. Because the NFL team isn't really a 'team.' It's a collection of isolated and terrified men slogging through an angry, lonely existence. Everybody has to be what I call the Marlboro Man. He acts fearless, but deep down he's scared. He's in a lot of pain, but he's not telling anybody about it”
“Something needed to change, but looking at yourself in the mirror and facing your demons is the hardest thing you will ever do in your life. You will duck it and avoid it - and make excuses for ducking and avoiding it - for a long, long time. I avoided it by throwing myself into work. I threw myself into project after project, filming movies and TV shows back to back to back. I was running away from myself as fast as I could, never stopping to look down or pause for a moment's self-reflection. I did that for years, even though I knew something was deeply wrong with me, even though I'd lost my daughter and nearly put myself in jail, even though my marriage and my family were barely holding on”
“I felt guilty as he went upstairs without me, but I couldn't stop. I was addicted. The way addiction works, whether it's alcohol or heroin or food or sex, is that you latch onto a thing or a habit or a substance that gives you a reprieve from reality. But when more problems arise from the substance you're abusing, that substance then presents itself as the solution to the same problems it has caused. And round and round you go, not even recognizing the cycle you've created for yourself. It's only looking back now that I can see the pattern”
“The hardest thing in the world is to remain connected to and interdependent with other people, to take and give advice, yet still know your own mind, to hear all of the competing voices in your head and know, with certainty, which one is your own. Becuse somebody's always got your aux cord. It could be an abusive boss or it could be a million Twitter trolls swarming after you. Somebody's always jacked in. Which is why you always have to be cognizant of who that person is and how much power they have over you. Like my son with his iPhone, whoever's got that cord controls what you hear, which means they can set your mood. If they can set your mood, they can influence how you feel. If they can influence how you feel, they can change the way you think. And if they can change the way you think, they can control the way you behave”
“When I do get angry, I've learned to manage it. I don't fly off the handle anymore. I don't snap. I've literally rewired my neural pathways to work differently. I feel the anger coming on, I identify the source of it, and I ask myself, 'Why am I letting this make me angry? Oh, I'm getting angry because I have an unrealistic expectation of how this other person should be acting. I need to let that go.' Or, 'I thought this person was antagonizing me, but really it's a miscommunication. I need to let that go.' And I do”
“It was seven years of a nomadic warrior lifestyle, and what I learned as I moved from team to team was that there were very few people I could talk to or trust. During those seven years, I played with literally hundreds of guys, and out of those hundreds of guys, I'd say five of them became true friends. Because the NFL team isn't really a 'team.' It's a collection of isolated and terrified men slogging through an angry, lonely existence. Everybody has to be what I call the Marlboro Man. He acts fearless, but deep down he's scared. He's in a lot of pain, but he's not telling anybody about it”
“Something needed to change, but looking at yourself in the mirror and facing your demons is the hardest thing you will ever do in your life. You will duck it and avoid it - and make excuses for ducking and avoiding it - for a long, long time. I avoided it by throwing myself into work. I threw myself into project after project, filming movies and TV shows back to back to back. I was running away from myself as fast as I could, never stopping to look down or pause for a moment's self-reflection. I did that for years, even though I knew something was deeply wrong with me, even though I'd lost my daughter and nearly put myself in jail, even though my marriage and my family were barely holding on”
“I felt guilty as he went upstairs without me, but I couldn't stop. I was addicted. The way addiction works, whether it's alcohol or heroin or food or sex, is that you latch onto a thing or a habit or a substance that gives you a reprieve from reality. But when more problems arise from the substance you're abusing, that substance then presents itself as the solution to the same problems it has caused. And round and round you go, not even recognizing the cycle you've created for yourself. It's only looking back now that I can see the pattern”
“The hardest thing in the world is to remain connected to and interdependent with other people, to take and give advice, yet still know your own mind, to hear all of the competing voices in your head and know, with certainty, which one is your own. Becuse somebody's always got your aux cord. It could be an abusive boss or it could be a million Twitter trolls swarming after you. Somebody's always jacked in. Which is why you always have to be cognizant of who that person is and how much power they have over you. Like my son with his iPhone, whoever's got that cord controls what you hear, which means they can set your mood. If they can set your mood, they can influence how you feel. If they can influence how you feel, they can change the way you think. And if they can change the way you think, they can control the way you behave”
“When I do get angry, I've learned to manage it. I don't fly off the handle anymore. I don't snap. I've literally rewired my neural pathways to work differently. I feel the anger coming on, I identify the source of it, and I ask myself, 'Why am I letting this make me angry? Oh, I'm getting angry because I have an unrealistic expectation of how this other person should be acting. I need to let that go.' Or, 'I thought this person was antagonizing me, but really it's a miscommunication. I need to let that go.' And I do”
November 12, 2023
Wow, I am genuinely surprised at how well this book turned out. I’ve always enjoyed Terry Crews as an actor, but I have such a different level of respect for him as a man.
The experiences he shared were raw, realistic, and educational. I found myself constantly making notes based on his insights because I was constantly being reminded of how I can and need to be a better husband and father. He pointed out such painfully obvious points surrounding anger and insecurity. He was relatable.
We talk a lot about the people we want to be; We do it all the time. But Terry intentionally changed the person he was, to be the person he needed to be, for himself and his family. What a powerful example of what being “tough” should mean for a man, or anyone for that matter.
This is a celebrity memoir that I would 100% read again, because it has real, relatable substance. Every man should read this book.
The experiences he shared were raw, realistic, and educational. I found myself constantly making notes based on his insights because I was constantly being reminded of how I can and need to be a better husband and father. He pointed out such painfully obvious points surrounding anger and insecurity. He was relatable.
We talk a lot about the people we want to be; We do it all the time. But Terry intentionally changed the person he was, to be the person he needed to be, for himself and his family. What a powerful example of what being “tough” should mean for a man, or anyone for that matter.
This is a celebrity memoir that I would 100% read again, because it has real, relatable substance. Every man should read this book.
January 4, 2024
Man, what a great memoir on masculinity and the importance of being a father who loves and trains his sons well.
Some of my favorite quotes
“Nothing good happens when you leave young men to fill in the blanks, because, when they start filling them, all the bad ideas they start coming up with take them to all sorts of unhealthy places “
“A fathers voice can land as hard as a punch”
“I thought true power was to win, dominate, and control. But the purpose of being strong is not to dominate but support. The purpose of being tough is not to control, but protect. The purpose of having power is not to rule but to serve. To be a true man is to be a servant. Use your advantage for the service of others”
Some of my favorite quotes
“Nothing good happens when you leave young men to fill in the blanks, because, when they start filling them, all the bad ideas they start coming up with take them to all sorts of unhealthy places “
“A fathers voice can land as hard as a punch”
“I thought true power was to win, dominate, and control. But the purpose of being strong is not to dominate but support. The purpose of being tough is not to control, but protect. The purpose of having power is not to rule but to serve. To be a true man is to be a servant. Use your advantage for the service of others”
March 6, 2023
I decided to listen to this book after listening to the podcast with him on the Tim Ferriss podcast.
There are lots of (bad) similarities between the culture he grew up in and the one predominantly present in Romania and Moldova, making this book a lot more relatable than I thought. It is also humbling to see that even apparently successful people struggle with the same issues as "normal" people.
I found lots of similarities between his way of dealing with problems and stoicism, mostly around the idea that all that matters is how we perceive what happens to us and not the thing itself.
Terry did a phenomenal job reading his book on Audible.
There are lots of (bad) similarities between the culture he grew up in and the one predominantly present in Romania and Moldova, making this book a lot more relatable than I thought. It is also humbling to see that even apparently successful people struggle with the same issues as "normal" people.
I found lots of similarities between his way of dealing with problems and stoicism, mostly around the idea that all that matters is how we perceive what happens to us and not the thing itself.
Terry did a phenomenal job reading his book on Audible.
February 14, 2023
Imagine the courage it must take to face all of the worst parts of yourself, take responsibility for your mistakes, admit you were wrong, and work tirelessly to become a better person. Add on the vulnerability required to share that journey with the world. Terry's story was raw, honest, real, and I found it very inspiring.
July 7, 2022
Crews jumps back and forth in time, telling (pretty depressing) stories from his life and the lessons he learned from them. Entertaining and inspiring.
January 9, 2023
A powerful memoir on masculinity, family, religion, abuse, money & fame.
Another side to Terry Crews, highly recommend.
Another side to Terry Crews, highly recommend.
August 15, 2025
Terry Crews is one of thoese actors that everyone recognizes, and from what I can tell in passing conversations, everyone seems to love. I'm no different. From a lackluster NFL career and being typecast and blaxploited to being a powerful voice in the spotlight for vulnerable men, recovering "tough guys", and driving racial conversations in a healthy level-headed way.
I have always found him entertaining, but where I fell in love with his soul was in a YouTube interview with a fitness icon C.T. Fletcher. The honest and authentic reflection of his life was something I immediately identifed with, and felt seen in a lot of ways, this being tied to childhood trauma and parental stuff. To see a muscle-draped black man talk about harsh upbringing, racially fueled roadblocks, and many of his own shortcomings is always going to cause waves and get looks, but to learn how he overcame, changed his mindset and saw his unfortunate situations as life lessons is truly inspiring and I knew I NEEDED to know his story more intimately.
The entire time I was devouring the pages I had his voice in my head and my experience reading his writing felt like he was talkingto me at times, and then warning me at others. His honesty invites the reader to question their own behaviors and holds a mirror up and I can't be happier that I read this book. This could pass as a self-help book in a lot of ways, but as an autobiograph it works all the same.
How do you give a book more than five stars?
I have always found him entertaining, but where I fell in love with his soul was in a YouTube interview with a fitness icon C.T. Fletcher. The honest and authentic reflection of his life was something I immediately identifed with, and felt seen in a lot of ways, this being tied to childhood trauma and parental stuff. To see a muscle-draped black man talk about harsh upbringing, racially fueled roadblocks, and many of his own shortcomings is always going to cause waves and get looks, but to learn how he overcame, changed his mindset and saw his unfortunate situations as life lessons is truly inspiring and I knew I NEEDED to know his story more intimately.
The entire time I was devouring the pages I had his voice in my head and my experience reading his writing felt like he was talkingto me at times, and then warning me at others. His honesty invites the reader to question their own behaviors and holds a mirror up and I can't be happier that I read this book. This could pass as a self-help book in a lot of ways, but as an autobiograph it works all the same.
How do you give a book more than five stars?
November 13, 2024
4 ⭐️
Captivating.
Ourstanding narration. This is a tale of Terry Crews’ growth. I thoroughly enjoyed learning about the defining events and moments of his life that molded him into the person that he is today. Terry’s story about working the temp janitorial job and his realization there was powerful.
If you appreciate Crews’ work on TV, then definitely give this book a go. I walked away liking him even more.
Captivating.
Ourstanding narration. This is a tale of Terry Crews’ growth. I thoroughly enjoyed learning about the defining events and moments of his life that molded him into the person that he is today. Terry’s story about working the temp janitorial job and his realization there was powerful.
If you appreciate Crews’ work on TV, then definitely give this book a go. I walked away liking him even more.
February 27, 2025
This was legitimately great. Not really sure what led me here or what I was expecting to find, but I found it.
July 15, 2022
I expected this book to be a little bit more about the experiences that Terry endured throughout his childhood. While there was some of that in the book, there was also a lot of other situations that Terry had endured throughout his adult life as well. At first I was a little bit turned off, because honestly everyone has issues in their life and I didn't really want to know about his issues in Hollywood but then the joke was on me. Some of those events, led to him being the advocate that he is today, and rather than being transformed by Hollywood in a negative way, he let these life lessons lead him in a direction that is much harder for the Hollywood elite to follow. I was very happy to learn that actually in spite of Hollywood, Terry Crews was very outspoken about abuses, injustices, and falsehoods about injustice.
I'll admit that when he started writing about Trayvon Martin I was side-eyeing the book because unfortunately in society, anytime that people start talking about Trayvon Martin or George Floyd, the conversation seems to be very one-sided and leans towards how white people are horrible. IMHO it's no way to move forward and grow and share experiences that others don't experience. But that was Terry Crews' entire point. These things were tragedies but rather than using them as tools to start a conversation, people let their rage and hatred take control, and the country has been divided because of the lack of ability to put emotions aside.
After reading this book I have a huge amount of respect for Terry Crews. He hasn't let any one thing define him, whether it was race, childhood trauma, career injustices, or his own brief stint with victimhood mentality. He has grown, changed, and become an advocate for abuse, racism (where it's actually happening) and common sense.
Since he actually had the ability to write candidly about the race wars, and how they won't be beneficial to anyone in the long run, I was way more receptive to his experiences with actual racism, and that has made me start thinking about things in a different light. As a white woman, I'm sick and tired of being yelled at for being a "racist" even though that couldn't be farther from the truth. This in turn causes me to shut out any conversation from people that scream racist at me, and so there is no healthy conversation to be had. Terry Crews has flipped the script with that topic, and even talked about how other black people have turned on him and called him awful names just because he refuses to hate on white people just for being white.
While parts of this book were very uncomfortable to read, I think it is something that truly needs to be read by many people. Terry Crews has a great perspective on life, and what it means to be truly powerful in this life.
I'll admit that when he started writing about Trayvon Martin I was side-eyeing the book because unfortunately in society, anytime that people start talking about Trayvon Martin or George Floyd, the conversation seems to be very one-sided and leans towards how white people are horrible. IMHO it's no way to move forward and grow and share experiences that others don't experience. But that was Terry Crews' entire point. These things were tragedies but rather than using them as tools to start a conversation, people let their rage and hatred take control, and the country has been divided because of the lack of ability to put emotions aside.
After reading this book I have a huge amount of respect for Terry Crews. He hasn't let any one thing define him, whether it was race, childhood trauma, career injustices, or his own brief stint with victimhood mentality. He has grown, changed, and become an advocate for abuse, racism (where it's actually happening) and common sense.
Since he actually had the ability to write candidly about the race wars, and how they won't be beneficial to anyone in the long run, I was way more receptive to his experiences with actual racism, and that has made me start thinking about things in a different light. As a white woman, I'm sick and tired of being yelled at for being a "racist" even though that couldn't be farther from the truth. This in turn causes me to shut out any conversation from people that scream racist at me, and so there is no healthy conversation to be had. Terry Crews has flipped the script with that topic, and even talked about how other black people have turned on him and called him awful names just because he refuses to hate on white people just for being white.
While parts of this book were very uncomfortable to read, I think it is something that truly needs to be read by many people. Terry Crews has a great perspective on life, and what it means to be truly powerful in this life.
August 28, 2022
I must admit, i really liked this book. Listening to the audiobook was a nice experience since it was narrated by Terry himself, who made funny voices and just showed off his acting skills. It's basically a biography of his life that focuses into different aspects, such as his porn addiction, his search for "true" masculinity, racism and his economic issues among other topics.
I must admit that Terry impressed me. I thought this memoir was just going to be a bunch of fun stories with not much to learn. But the entire book is focused around his self-development, how he found toughness and true power in self-control, how he developed empathy, kindness and integrity, and how he overcame his traumas and moved from his past, all explained in a very entertaining and captivating way.
However, the one thing that did bother me a little bit was Terry's "Mr.Nice Guy", apologetic character. This is entirely subjective, of course. Despite this, Terry struck me as a good, respectable man.
I must admit that Terry impressed me. I thought this memoir was just going to be a bunch of fun stories with not much to learn. But the entire book is focused around his self-development, how he found toughness and true power in self-control, how he developed empathy, kindness and integrity, and how he overcame his traumas and moved from his past, all explained in a very entertaining and captivating way.
However, the one thing that did bother me a little bit was Terry's "Mr.Nice Guy", apologetic character. This is entirely subjective, of course. Despite this, Terry struck me as a good, respectable man.
September 23, 2022
I felt so privileged being able to read such a personal account of someone’s life and their story. Terry Crews is the ‘toughest’ person in my book based on his honestly and self awareness. I cherished going through every chapter knowing I am reading a true account of events and his experiences. I highly recommend it to anyone who likes ‘real’ talk
August 28, 2023
This memoir was captivating from beginning to end. I usually get confused when authors jump around when telling their life story but I loved how this one was arranged. Definitely in my Top 3 best memoirs I’ve read so far!
December 2, 2022
Eloquent and real.
January 9, 2024
Interesting book.
Read
January 21, 2023Very interesting. I listened to the audiobook for like an hour lying on the beach in the sun so I think the atmosphere added to my enjoyment. Then the next day I almost finished listening to it as I waited for Siena on the beach and it was so windy and my towel was wet and I was freezing so not as enjoyable. The when we got home I played Hogwarts: Mystery as I read the last chapter, so good finish.
January 18, 2024
A great autobiographical book with powerful insights backed by stories/life experiences. There was some unexpected surprising life experiences based on what I've seen and heard from Terry Crews in TV, movies, and podcasts. He overcame alot of struggles. Would recomend to anyone that is or has been interested in Terry Crews career and activities.
August 15, 2024
This book was more about his mental struggles, than his career. Still glad I read it.
August 22, 2023
Such a thought provoking and interesting read… Terry deserved a lot better growing up and it was inspiring to see how he overcame the struggles he dealt with from his childhood
August 2, 2022
A transparent tale from Terry Crews. A great book where he talks about toxic masculinity and vulnerability. One of my favourite memoirs to date!
May 4, 2022
Tough: My Journey to True Power by Terry Crews
Published April 26, 2022
<3 This was not at all like I anticipated--in a GOOD WAY. I had several epiphanies listening to Terry narrate his truth. I love him as a comedic actor and his discipline to maintaining that Mandingo Statuesque Presence. Listening to a fellow ACA (ADULT CHILD OF AN ALCOHOLIC AND OR DYSFUNCTIONAL UPBRINGING) and his journey that led to his mental and emotional health issues were instrumental in allowing me to recall some traumas that I too buried. Yes it was trauma triggering but also validating. More men (Black Men Specifically) need to work through their issues in a professional capacity. My hope is that the Black Men in my family and community will follow his lead and let all the shit just hang out and let go of the shame that they inherited genetically and historically or inherited through nature and or nurture. His views towards, spending, earning, hoarding/collecting, tithing and the #METOO movement were especially revealing. He recommended a couple of books some of which I have read and the others I have added to the top of my TBR list. His humility and transparencies had me loving and hating him as I listened to this audiobook. Ultimately, I have to give him props for revealing EVERYTHING--all the hurt that he suffered AND dished out--as well as the healing and vulnerability he put out there for the world to see/hear. We all got something! I am glad he went into therapy and done the work to bring peace to himself and do the ongoing work to heal from his traumatic, dysfunctional and violent childhood. I too will continue to do the same. <3
Terry Crews spent decades cultivating his bodybuilder physique and bravado. On the outside, he seemed invincible: he escaped his abusive father, went pro in the NFL, and broke into the glamorous world of Hollywood. But his fixation with appearing outwardly tough eventually turned into an exhausting performance in which repressing his emotions let them get the better of him—leading him into addiction and threatening the most important relationships in his life.
Now Crews is sharing the raw, never-before-told story of his quest to find the true meaning of toughness. In Tough, he examines arenas of life where he desperately sought control—masculinity, shame, sex, experiences with racism, and relationships—and recounts the setbacks and victories he faced while uprooting deeply ingrained toxic masculinity and finally confronting his insecurities, painful memories, and limiting beliefs. The result is not only the gripping story of a man's struggle against himself and how he finally got his mind right, but a bold indictment of the cultural norms and taboos that ask men to be outwardly tough while leaving them inwardly weak.
With Tough, Crews's journey of transformation offers a model for anyone who considers themselves a “tough guy” but feels unfulfilled; anyone struggling with procrastination or self-sabotage; and anyone ready to achieve true, lasting self-mastery.
Published April 26, 2022
<3 This was not at all like I anticipated--in a GOOD WAY. I had several epiphanies listening to Terry narrate his truth. I love him as a comedic actor and his discipline to maintaining that Mandingo Statuesque Presence. Listening to a fellow ACA (ADULT CHILD OF AN ALCOHOLIC AND OR DYSFUNCTIONAL UPBRINGING) and his journey that led to his mental and emotional health issues were instrumental in allowing me to recall some traumas that I too buried. Yes it was trauma triggering but also validating. More men (Black Men Specifically) need to work through their issues in a professional capacity. My hope is that the Black Men in my family and community will follow his lead and let all the shit just hang out and let go of the shame that they inherited genetically and historically or inherited through nature and or nurture. His views towards, spending, earning, hoarding/collecting, tithing and the #METOO movement were especially revealing. He recommended a couple of books some of which I have read and the others I have added to the top of my TBR list. His humility and transparencies had me loving and hating him as I listened to this audiobook. Ultimately, I have to give him props for revealing EVERYTHING--all the hurt that he suffered AND dished out--as well as the healing and vulnerability he put out there for the world to see/hear. We all got something! I am glad he went into therapy and done the work to bring peace to himself and do the ongoing work to heal from his traumatic, dysfunctional and violent childhood. I too will continue to do the same. <3
Terry Crews spent decades cultivating his bodybuilder physique and bravado. On the outside, he seemed invincible: he escaped his abusive father, went pro in the NFL, and broke into the glamorous world of Hollywood. But his fixation with appearing outwardly tough eventually turned into an exhausting performance in which repressing his emotions let them get the better of him—leading him into addiction and threatening the most important relationships in his life.
Now Crews is sharing the raw, never-before-told story of his quest to find the true meaning of toughness. In Tough, he examines arenas of life where he desperately sought control—masculinity, shame, sex, experiences with racism, and relationships—and recounts the setbacks and victories he faced while uprooting deeply ingrained toxic masculinity and finally confronting his insecurities, painful memories, and limiting beliefs. The result is not only the gripping story of a man's struggle against himself and how he finally got his mind right, but a bold indictment of the cultural norms and taboos that ask men to be outwardly tough while leaving them inwardly weak.
With Tough, Crews's journey of transformation offers a model for anyone who considers themselves a “tough guy” but feels unfulfilled; anyone struggling with procrastination or self-sabotage; and anyone ready to achieve true, lasting self-mastery.
February 7, 2025
𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡: 𝐌𝐲 𝐉𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐲 ����𝐨 𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐞 𝐏𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 by Terry Crews is an offensive body of work that paints Black people with an, inexcusably negative brush that I found both unacceptable and disgraceful!
⠀
Before reading this book I knew nothing about the Twitter storm Terry Crews started when he posted an insensitive tweet two weeks after the murder of George Floyd. In the mist of the Black Lives Matter movement Terry tweeted, "We must ensure #blacklivesmatter doesn't morph into #blacklivesbetter." This tweet set off a firestorm that invoked a response from many prominent people including Dr. Bernice King, the daughter of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Had I known about his compassionless twitter post before buying this audiobook, I most definitely would not have bought it.
⠀
Although Terry publicly apologized for the tweet, in this book he admits he only regrets the timing of the post, not the message. Terry went on to say, after the George Floyd murder he saw Black people demonize white people. He stated, Black people had a right to be angry, but instead we were enraged…WTF TERRY! OF COURSE WE WERE ENRAGED! WE WITNESSED THE MURDER, A MODERN DAY LYNCHING OF A BLACK MAN IN BROAD DAYLIGHT BY A POLICE OFFICER! YOU SHOULD BE ENRAGED TOO🤬!!!
⠀
Throughout the book he takes every moment possible to bash black people. Listening to his Uncle Ruckus (shoutout to the Boondocks) mentality literally made my blood pressure rise.
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Terry compared the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson to the murder Travon Martin. But then he took it ten steps further by stating it was Black women’s hatred for White women that caused the Black women jurors to find OJ Simpson innocent.
⠀
What the entire F*#k!!
⠀
Terry bashed the teaching of African American Studies in college. He had the audacity to say, if you meet a Black man and the Black man starts the conversation with, “Hey ma brotha” that man is up to no good. He bashed the hiphop community for being overly Afrocentric in the Public Enemy, Queen Latifah days. Called them over-the-top. He also declared that the “I’m black and I’m proud” era of the 60s was ridiculous and bafoonish.
⠀
Although the book’s title is 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡, the more accurate title would have been 𝐕𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦. Terry spends 9 hours and 13 minutes talking about everyone in his life that has ever wronged him. His attempt at taking accountability for his own actions are grossly overshadowed by the constant blame he puts on others for making him behave the way he has in the past, and in my opinion, the way he currently behaves.
⠀
After listening to this audiobook I am no longer a supporter of Terry Crews. As a black woman I find 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 highly offensive. I regret spending my money to buy it. I don’t care if he only made a half penny from my purchase, I want my 1/2 penny back!
⠀
Let me be clear, I give this book 1⭐️. Not because of the writing style, this rating is solely a reflection of its content!
⠀
Before reading this book I knew nothing about the Twitter storm Terry Crews started when he posted an insensitive tweet two weeks after the murder of George Floyd. In the mist of the Black Lives Matter movement Terry tweeted, "We must ensure #blacklivesmatter doesn't morph into #blacklivesbetter." This tweet set off a firestorm that invoked a response from many prominent people including Dr. Bernice King, the daughter of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Had I known about his compassionless twitter post before buying this audiobook, I most definitely would not have bought it.
⠀
Although Terry publicly apologized for the tweet, in this book he admits he only regrets the timing of the post, not the message. Terry went on to say, after the George Floyd murder he saw Black people demonize white people. He stated, Black people had a right to be angry, but instead we were enraged…WTF TERRY! OF COURSE WE WERE ENRAGED! WE WITNESSED THE MURDER, A MODERN DAY LYNCHING OF A BLACK MAN IN BROAD DAYLIGHT BY A POLICE OFFICER! YOU SHOULD BE ENRAGED TOO🤬!!!
⠀
Throughout the book he takes every moment possible to bash black people. Listening to his Uncle Ruckus (shoutout to the Boondocks) mentality literally made my blood pressure rise.
⠀
Terry compared the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson to the murder Travon Martin. But then he took it ten steps further by stating it was Black women’s hatred for White women that caused the Black women jurors to find OJ Simpson innocent.
⠀
What the entire F*#k!!
⠀
Terry bashed the teaching of African American Studies in college. He had the audacity to say, if you meet a Black man and the Black man starts the conversation with, “Hey ma brotha” that man is up to no good. He bashed the hiphop community for being overly Afrocentric in the Public Enemy, Queen Latifah days. Called them over-the-top. He also declared that the “I’m black and I’m proud” era of the 60s was ridiculous and bafoonish.
⠀
Although the book’s title is 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡, the more accurate title would have been 𝐕𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐦. Terry spends 9 hours and 13 minutes talking about everyone in his life that has ever wronged him. His attempt at taking accountability for his own actions are grossly overshadowed by the constant blame he puts on others for making him behave the way he has in the past, and in my opinion, the way he currently behaves.
⠀
After listening to this audiobook I am no longer a supporter of Terry Crews. As a black woman I find 𝐓𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 highly offensive. I regret spending my money to buy it. I don’t care if he only made a half penny from my purchase, I want my 1/2 penny back!
⠀
Let me be clear, I give this book 1⭐️. Not because of the writing style, this rating is solely a reflection of its content!
January 12, 2023
I mentioned this in other reviews, but I am always surprised by the degree to which I like celebrity memoirs. It takes a lot for me to start them, because I suppose I think they're going to be just an exercise in self-promotion, but they're often very impactful.
I didn't know much about Terry Crews until he was on Brooklyn 99 (9-9!), and of course I fell in love with his character along with everyone else. His background was vaguely familiar to me but I didn't know much about him. I knew he had played football and of course I was absolutely obsessed with his Old Spice commercial work. What millennial doesn't remember "silver fish hand catch"?
It wasn't until last year when I listened to an interview that Crews did with Tim Ferris on his podcast that I learned about the man himself. If you aren't already familiar, he is an incredible multi-talented artist and creator. He is an accomplished painter, an award-winning furniture designer, and it turns out he's a pretty good writer too. But where I really found value was understanding his way of thinking about what it means to be a good man and healthy masculinity.
It's a much broader topic than can be addressed here, but it's no secret that gender dynamics and masculinity is in crisis. Structural misogyny and patriarchy have caused and are causing so much suffering, and at least in my circles, there is a very clear effort to identify and neutralize or root out the more toxic elements of masculinity. This is a great change! I'm certainly proud to be a feminist and consider myself part of that movement. The trouble is that it's very easy for male identity to be overwhelmed with negative sentiment. And when that happens, some insecure men feel like they're only choices are to reject themselves or reject feminism and embrace f*ckw@ds like Andrew Tate. What Terry Crews is doing in this book, more than anything, (at least for me) is holding up a model of what it should mean to be a man.
I finished this book about 2 weeks ago and in the time since I've been thinking about it a lot. Specifically, it has given me a great framework for thinking about my roles. As a father, husband, and man. There's a lot more to it than that. But for me, that will probably be the most lasting impact.
I didn't know much about Terry Crews until he was on Brooklyn 99 (9-9!), and of course I fell in love with his character along with everyone else. His background was vaguely familiar to me but I didn't know much about him. I knew he had played football and of course I was absolutely obsessed with his Old Spice commercial work. What millennial doesn't remember "silver fish hand catch"?
It wasn't until last year when I listened to an interview that Crews did with Tim Ferris on his podcast that I learned about the man himself. If you aren't already familiar, he is an incredible multi-talented artist and creator. He is an accomplished painter, an award-winning furniture designer, and it turns out he's a pretty good writer too. But where I really found value was understanding his way of thinking about what it means to be a good man and healthy masculinity.
It's a much broader topic than can be addressed here, but it's no secret that gender dynamics and masculinity is in crisis. Structural misogyny and patriarchy have caused and are causing so much suffering, and at least in my circles, there is a very clear effort to identify and neutralize or root out the more toxic elements of masculinity. This is a great change! I'm certainly proud to be a feminist and consider myself part of that movement. The trouble is that it's very easy for male identity to be overwhelmed with negative sentiment. And when that happens, some insecure men feel like they're only choices are to reject themselves or reject feminism and embrace f*ckw@ds like Andrew Tate. What Terry Crews is doing in this book, more than anything, (at least for me) is holding up a model of what it should mean to be a man.
I finished this book about 2 weeks ago and in the time since I've been thinking about it a lot. Specifically, it has given me a great framework for thinking about my roles. As a father, husband, and man. There's a lot more to it than that. But for me, that will probably be the most lasting impact.
June 15, 2022
Sorry but this book is horrible. I wasn't expecting much- I never typically do from celebrity authors- but I decided to give this one a try because the abstract seemed interesting enough and I thought it would be a quick read.
The writing is definitely amateur, if not below amateur. Within the first chapter, this was evident, although I pressed on because his origin story was not what I was expecting.
I'll save you the details, but in general, he grew up with lots of violence, physical and mental abuse, danger, drug and gang culture ect.
I was able to get through that part, even though at multiple times the writing was so irritating I desperately wanted to quit.
I even staggered on through his self -righteous and quite insincere account of how he "took his talent agency to task" And stood up for the rights of the women in the me too movement by suing the talent agent that groped him once at a party.
What finally made me tap out, was the fact that he turned the entire book into a very I'll informed and inarticulate commentary on race in America. The account included him asserting a number of egregious points like:
"Black people can be racist too"
"Race doesn't define where you go and opportunities you get"
"Stop being mad at white people when really the problem is that you are sitting around blaming them and feeling sorry for yourself"
"Racism is just that people can be ignorant sometimes and it's not their fault"
Sorry but I can't. We really need to stop just letting everyone write a book these days. I hope I've saved some of you the trouble.
Happy Reading :)
The writing is definitely amateur, if not below amateur. Within the first chapter, this was evident, although I pressed on because his origin story was not what I was expecting.
I'll save you the details, but in general, he grew up with lots of violence, physical and mental abuse, danger, drug and gang culture ect.
I was able to get through that part, even though at multiple times the writing was so irritating I desperately wanted to quit.
I even staggered on through his self -righteous and quite insincere account of how he "took his talent agency to task" And stood up for the rights of the women in the me too movement by suing the talent agent that groped him once at a party.
What finally made me tap out, was the fact that he turned the entire book into a very I'll informed and inarticulate commentary on race in America. The account included him asserting a number of egregious points like:
"Black people can be racist too"
"Race doesn't define where you go and opportunities you get"
"Stop being mad at white people when really the problem is that you are sitting around blaming them and feeling sorry for yourself"
"Racism is just that people can be ignorant sometimes and it's not their fault"
Sorry but I can't. We really need to stop just letting everyone write a book these days. I hope I've saved some of you the trouble.
Happy Reading :)
December 11, 2023
Possibly the best celebrity memoir I've ever read and generally an excellent memoir. This man has done the WORK. From confronting his shame, pride, ego, and deep former misogyny he laid his soul bare and documented the struggles of fighting his way out fromm them. He readily admits his copious mistakes and atones for them while also treating himself with compassion. Rage, racism, porn addiction, religion, cults, sexual assault, art, acting, football/ NFL, victimhood- were all topics touched upon. He reflected upon the toxic masculinity he grew up surrounded by, was shaped by, and perpetrated, recognized how he was killing himself and harming his family, and actively fought to change himself. He forgave those that formed him but instead of using that trauma as an excuse, holds himself to a higher standard and judges himself against the person he could be.
I loved that, on numerous occasions, the mentioned that when he didn't know the answers he turned to reading and spoke briefly about the most formative books. I love anyone who promotes self-education (and it suits that this book is my 100th of the year).
NINE, NINE, Terry.-- Perhaps my one criticism is that he didn't speak much at all about Brooklyn99 but that's just cuz it's a favourite of mine.
I loved that, on numerous occasions, the mentioned that when he didn't know the answers he turned to reading and spoke briefly about the most formative books. I love anyone who promotes self-education (and it suits that this book is my 100th of the year).
NINE, NINE, Terry.-- Perhaps my one criticism is that he didn't speak much at all about Brooklyn99 but that's just cuz it's a favourite of mine.
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