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I'm Supposed to Make a Difference: A Memoir About Overcoming Trauma and Abuse
Very few people know about the childhood trauma Kevin endured long ago in western New York. At first glance, he appears as an average engineer - with a loving wife, two amazing children, and a stable job. As Kevin digs deep into his memories, lingering doubts plague him as to whether a young girl he once knew survived the horrors - or fell to a tragic fate. Fighting a grueling battle for decades against his long-buried memories, Kevin unravels mysteries and patterns to overcome the depression, anxiety, and suicidal inclinations that those same memories caused. Today, he's largely conquered his demons - and shares with you the strategies he used to heal and transform. Kevin's doctor describes this deeply-honest account of his trauma, mental health treatment, and redemption as "a story about transformation and hope."
- GenresMemoirNonfiction
172 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 2021
175 people are currently reading
1298 people want to read
About the author
Kevin Vought
1 book11 followersKevin holds two master of science degrees in civil engineering and nuclear engineering. He currently works with his wife, Jill, running a very successful pediatric therapy clinic she owns on the north end of the Tampa metro area. He’s been married to his wife for over twenty-two years. They have two daughters, one 17 and the other 15.
When Kevin’s engineering geek side isn’t showing through with him watching old reruns of Star Trek: TNG or the Discovery or Science channels, he enjoys a good belly laugh with Big Bang Theory or some action in shows like Breaking Bad. He primarily reads the news and educational materials as well.
At every stage in his life, Kevin has made strides toward healing himself from tremendous trauma suffered as a very young child. He still has a few lingering demons, but has largely defeated all of them.
When Kevin’s engineering geek side isn’t showing through with him watching old reruns of Star Trek: TNG or the Discovery or Science channels, he enjoys a good belly laugh with Big Bang Theory or some action in shows like Breaking Bad. He primarily reads the news and educational materials as well.
At every stage in his life, Kevin has made strides toward healing himself from tremendous trauma suffered as a very young child. He still has a few lingering demons, but has largely defeated all of them.
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
September 13, 2021
This is the story of how the author, Kevin Vought, overcame his childhood trauma and abuse and made sure his children’s lives were nothing like his own. I think he does a good job of showing what he’s overcome without making those who struggle more with their trauma look bad or weak. He never makes anyone feel bad for struggling more.
The book is mostly memoir with a little bit of advice in the last few chapters. This is probably obvious but the book is a big TRIGGER WARNING for abuse of all kinds and suicidal discussions.
Only one thing bothered me. He talks about briefly harming himself and then says when he gets to college he outgrew self harm. That bothered me because many adults self harm. By saying outgrew, he makes it sound like those who still do are childish. I’m sure that’s not what he meant though. Maybe the author doesn’t realize adults do it too. Society does tend to focus on teens and self harm.
The book is written for other survivors of trauma and abuse. You can certainly read it if you didn’t suffer abuse but that’s who it’s aimed at.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
The book is mostly memoir with a little bit of advice in the last few chapters. This is probably obvious but the book is a big TRIGGER WARNING for abuse of all kinds and suicidal discussions.
Only one thing bothered me. He talks about briefly harming himself and then says when he gets to college he outgrew self harm. That bothered me because many adults self harm. By saying outgrew, he makes it sound like those who still do are childish. I’m sure that’s not what he meant though. Maybe the author doesn’t realize adults do it too. Society does tend to focus on teens and self harm.
The book is written for other survivors of trauma and abuse. You can certainly read it if you didn’t suffer abuse but that’s who it’s aimed at.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
October 30, 2021
It read a bit more like a self-help book than a true memoir. I didn't feel much of an emotional connection with the author. I appreciate that the author shared his memories of trauma and battle with mental health. Read my full review at Girl Who Reads.
July 26, 2021
This is the story of how the author, Kevin Vought, overcame his childhood trauma and abuse and made sure his children’s lives were nothing like his own. I think he does a good job of showing what he’s overcome without making those who struggle more with their trauma look bad or weak. He never makes anyone feel bad for struggling more.
The book is mostly memoir with a little bit of advice in the last few chapters. This is probably obvious but the book is a big TRIGGER WARNING for abuse of all kinds and suicidal discussions.
Only one thing bothered me. He talks about briefly harming himself and then says when he gets to college he outgrew self harm. That bothered me because many adults self harm. By saying outgrew, he makes it sound like those who still do are childish. I’m sure that’s not what he meant though. Maybe the author doesn’t realize adults do it too. Society does tend to focus on teens and self harm.
The book is written for other survivors of trauma and abuse. You can certainly read it if you didn’t suffer abuse but that’s who it’s aimed at.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
The book is mostly memoir with a little bit of advice in the last few chapters. This is probably obvious but the book is a big TRIGGER WARNING for abuse of all kinds and suicidal discussions.
Only one thing bothered me. He talks about briefly harming himself and then says when he gets to college he outgrew self harm. That bothered me because many adults self harm. By saying outgrew, he makes it sound like those who still do are childish. I’m sure that’s not what he meant though. Maybe the author doesn’t realize adults do it too. Society does tend to focus on teens and self harm.
The book is written for other survivors of trauma and abuse. You can certainly read it if you didn’t suffer abuse but that’s who it’s aimed at.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
September 6, 2021
First, I want to thank Kevin Vought, Dr. Mary Watson, PhD, Dr. Margaurete Pinard and Author Marketing Experts for providing me with this book so I may bring you this review.
WOW!! Just WOW!! Never have I read a #MeToo book where a male was the victim of intense traumatic abuse. Kevin Vought needs to be commended for being brave and sharing his deeply personal story in I’m Supposed to Make a Difference with his readers. This is a very well written, extremely powerful, totally heartbreaking, and shocking read that must be put on your TBR pile. This is a book I guarantee many will be talking about!
Kevin has been so blessed to have the guidance, loving support, patience and debates of devotion from his beautiful wife Jill. Without her, Kevin would not be who he is right now. She is the one that stood by his side through all the dark times.
Kevin’s girls are a constant reminder to him every day of what truly matters.
In I’m Supposed to Make a Difference readers get not only to hear Kevin’s story but we get to hear from his clinical psychologist’s who share some insight for us.
I'm Supposed to Make a Difference brings up some very difficult subjects that may be hard to read or be triggers for some readers. Please keep this in mind.
What an incredibly small world that I learned that Kevin and I both grew up in WNY! I live in Buffalo but lived in Rochester (where he lived) for many years. I smiled as he mentioned some of my favorite places such as Bill Greys, Abbotts Ice Cream, our love of the Buffalo Bills, etc. Knowing that he lived in WNY it made my stomach crawl that all this happened within our backyard!!
Kevin will give you a raw glimpse into his childhood and you will learn how sick and twisted his family really was! He truly opens his heart and really lets you into his world on all the feelings, emotions, and mental state he was going through. This must have not been an easy book to write but in the long run very therapeutic for him.
We also get a glimpse into how life has changed for him throughout the years. He gives a lot of great advice that would help in many situations as well.
WOW!! Just WOW!! Never have I read a #MeToo book where a male was the victim of intense traumatic abuse. Kevin Vought needs to be commended for being brave and sharing his deeply personal story in I’m Supposed to Make a Difference with his readers. This is a very well written, extremely powerful, totally heartbreaking, and shocking read that must be put on your TBR pile. This is a book I guarantee many will be talking about!
Kevin has been so blessed to have the guidance, loving support, patience and debates of devotion from his beautiful wife Jill. Without her, Kevin would not be who he is right now. She is the one that stood by his side through all the dark times.
Kevin’s girls are a constant reminder to him every day of what truly matters.
In I’m Supposed to Make a Difference readers get not only to hear Kevin’s story but we get to hear from his clinical psychologist’s who share some insight for us.
I'm Supposed to Make a Difference brings up some very difficult subjects that may be hard to read or be triggers for some readers. Please keep this in mind.
What an incredibly small world that I learned that Kevin and I both grew up in WNY! I live in Buffalo but lived in Rochester (where he lived) for many years. I smiled as he mentioned some of my favorite places such as Bill Greys, Abbotts Ice Cream, our love of the Buffalo Bills, etc. Knowing that he lived in WNY it made my stomach crawl that all this happened within our backyard!!
Kevin will give you a raw glimpse into his childhood and you will learn how sick and twisted his family really was! He truly opens his heart and really lets you into his world on all the feelings, emotions, and mental state he was going through. This must have not been an easy book to write but in the long run very therapeutic for him.
We also get a glimpse into how life has changed for him throughout the years. He gives a lot of great advice that would help in many situations as well.
May 30, 2022
Phenomenal and Comprehensive!
It feels wrong to say I "enjoyed" or even "liked" this book given the subject matter of child sexual abuse, intense emotional abuse and evil in human form. As a fellow survivor, AND caring human being, I will instead say that I admire the author's tremendous courage (even as a little boy), his relentless pursuit of truth, his willingness to confront the pain, his brutal honesty and, among other things, the miracle that enabled him to be successful in his career, to be able to love deeply, to marry and mutually work at happiness, to parent his daughters lovingly, respectfully and protectively, and to STILL care about "making a difference" for others. Kevin has such strength of character that his father and grandfather were too consumed by perversion and hate to even come close to!
The book itself is one that is very comprehensive in that it covers the author's childhood, family life, education, etc as well as aspects of his abuse and trauma --much of which was buried in his subconscious for years, what he found helpful and not so helpful, how he reaches his goals, his treatment and healing process and more. One part I felt was especially important to include and so profound it brought tears was his writing about loneliness, rejection and it's relationship to suicide. As Mr. Vought pointed out, so many people avoid that topic due to the stigma around it and the discomfort it induces. Yet how do you write a book about abuse of a helpless child at the hands of someone supposed to cherish and protect them, and NOT discuss it even if only to mention it, state it's not uncommon or untreatable and leave a number for them to call? Child sexual abuse is the worst thing a child can go through except for murder! To address the issue that sometimes victims/survivors have felt suicidal seems only right!
Kudos to the author for demonstrating it's best to talk about it, to face it when you are ready, to seek treatment, to refuse to keep the secret and that it's very possible to THRIVE, rather than merely survive!
It feels wrong to say I "enjoyed" or even "liked" this book given the subject matter of child sexual abuse, intense emotional abuse and evil in human form. As a fellow survivor, AND caring human being, I will instead say that I admire the author's tremendous courage (even as a little boy), his relentless pursuit of truth, his willingness to confront the pain, his brutal honesty and, among other things, the miracle that enabled him to be successful in his career, to be able to love deeply, to marry and mutually work at happiness, to parent his daughters lovingly, respectfully and protectively, and to STILL care about "making a difference" for others. Kevin has such strength of character that his father and grandfather were too consumed by perversion and hate to even come close to!
The book itself is one that is very comprehensive in that it covers the author's childhood, family life, education, etc as well as aspects of his abuse and trauma --much of which was buried in his subconscious for years, what he found helpful and not so helpful, how he reaches his goals, his treatment and healing process and more. One part I felt was especially important to include and so profound it brought tears was his writing about loneliness, rejection and it's relationship to suicide. As Mr. Vought pointed out, so many people avoid that topic due to the stigma around it and the discomfort it induces. Yet how do you write a book about abuse of a helpless child at the hands of someone supposed to cherish and protect them, and NOT discuss it even if only to mention it, state it's not uncommon or untreatable and leave a number for them to call? Child sexual abuse is the worst thing a child can go through except for murder! To address the issue that sometimes victims/survivors have felt suicidal seems only right!
Kudos to the author for demonstrating it's best to talk about it, to face it when you are ready, to seek treatment, to refuse to keep the secret and that it's very possible to THRIVE, rather than merely survive!
December 20, 2021
Gripping and incredibly powerful
A moving story of intense traumatic abuse and heartwarming inspiration.
It is about one man’s journey out of darkness, through shining a light on the past fighting a gruelling battle for decades against his long-buried memories.
.
Sensitively and honestly written, it highlights the terrifying experiences of child abuse without shying away from the harsh realities of the subject.
This book makes readers understand the complexity of abuse, learn how he survived much hardship and how he eventually came out triumphant. The twists and turns throughout the novel keep me eagerly reading on. I loved the Poem” How You?” representing the author’s life at the end of the book. This is not a Memoir for the Faint-hearted.
Loved these lines from the book:
Don’t go looking for trouble, but sure as hell don’t run from it like a coward either.
Moving past the hurt sometimes allows you to see the good in people that has been obscured by the pain.
Our pasts are not “fixed,” and we cannot remain “stuck” as long as we are provided a blanket of emotional safety—and summon the courage to question, confront, and challenge the assumptions we make about ourselves and our pasts.
A moving story of intense traumatic abuse and heartwarming inspiration.
It is about one man’s journey out of darkness, through shining a light on the past fighting a gruelling battle for decades against his long-buried memories.
.
Sensitively and honestly written, it highlights the terrifying experiences of child abuse without shying away from the harsh realities of the subject.
This book makes readers understand the complexity of abuse, learn how he survived much hardship and how he eventually came out triumphant. The twists and turns throughout the novel keep me eagerly reading on. I loved the Poem” How You?” representing the author’s life at the end of the book. This is not a Memoir for the Faint-hearted.
Loved these lines from the book:
Don’t go looking for trouble, but sure as hell don’t run from it like a coward either.
Moving past the hurt sometimes allows you to see the good in people that has been obscured by the pain.
Our pasts are not “fixed,” and we cannot remain “stuck” as long as we are provided a blanket of emotional safety—and summon the courage to question, confront, and challenge the assumptions we make about ourselves and our pasts.
January 17, 2022
Well written. Good Encouragement
I very much enjoyed reading about the author’s journey with the trauma from abuse he suffered. It was very well written and he articulated things very well. I appreciated how he encouraged people who are dealing with trauma to get help and gave direction as to how to do that. He seems very blessed to have a wife who is very supportive and helpful with his journey. The only thing that confused me throughout the book is how he called his mother his hero but then would explain how she emotionally abused him profusely throughout his life. Other than that I believe this book would be very helpful and definitely make a difference in many peoples lives.
I very much enjoyed reading about the author’s journey with the trauma from abuse he suffered. It was very well written and he articulated things very well. I appreciated how he encouraged people who are dealing with trauma to get help and gave direction as to how to do that. He seems very blessed to have a wife who is very supportive and helpful with his journey. The only thing that confused me throughout the book is how he called his mother his hero but then would explain how she emotionally abused him profusely throughout his life. Other than that I believe this book would be very helpful and definitely make a difference in many peoples lives.
August 2, 2022
So Sad
It's hard for me to only give this book a three star rating, however, there were a couple issues I couldn't get past. First, the story kept jumping timelines and was confusing me. I also found it hard to really connect to Kevin and that saddens me because no one should ever have to suffer what he did. I also agree with other reviews that it reads more like a self help book. I applaud the bravery of the author for sharing his story and wish him all the happiness and joy in the world.
It's hard for me to only give this book a three star rating, however, there were a couple issues I couldn't get past. First, the story kept jumping timelines and was confusing me. I also found it hard to really connect to Kevin and that saddens me because no one should ever have to suffer what he did. I also agree with other reviews that it reads more like a self help book. I applaud the bravery of the author for sharing his story and wish him all the happiness and joy in the world.
May 31, 2022
It’s always a little more healing and helpful to know you are not alone and you are worthy. He shows you how he made it through and some of his ways were things I had not even thought of before. As sad of a story he has he also has a positive out come and for that he has helped me in my way of dealing with certain things. I think it’s a must read for anyone. You don’t have to be the one who had trauma, his wife is an angel sent to him and you might be that angel sent to love someone else.
November 26, 2021
Kevin,
Thank you so much for writing this book.
Thank you so much for writing this book.
March 28, 2023
truly beautiful, graphic and hard to read at times but all todayher a wonderful story about overcoming hardships with an immense amount of methods in order to overcome trauma
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews