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304 pages, Paperback
First published May 5, 2020
and so far it is AMAZING I really hope Debbi Michiko Florence creates a book about either Aubree Connor and/or Rin OR another book about Keiko.Plot - ★★★The story starts off with the trio's friendship already on the frays. Seems like over the course of their break, Jenna realized there was a world beyond her friends while Keiko stayed sucking up to Audrey's whims. I loved the toxic friendship and Keiko's toxic positivity storyline. I think children as young as they are should learn how to identify people who carry good intentions for them and be able to know that change is uncomfortable, but it's not always necessarily bad. I didn't really have much appreciation over the messy family storyline. With a mom who's supposedly a genius government officer, she forgets to tell her family why she's been going out to dinner with a superior? Not even through text? I almost thought she was a closeted lesbian who finally had the courage to cheat on her husband with a woman. Come on, I think I needed more than that. After the family finished fixing their issue, we got Keiko's mom's apology, but I thought Keiko would finally be able to rant to her mom about her friendship troubles and get some good advice because she's been raving about her mom giving good advices, but all I got was her mom rehashing a Pinterest emo quote. Throughout the story, I hated Keiko's naivete. While it's understandable that she's in middle grade, it was annoying how she kept choosing Audrey over and over again despite it being shown to her face how Audrey would willingly drop her like hot fudge in a split second over a boy, or over anything she thinks is more worthy paying attention to at the moment. The kid was a plain doormat through and through. Also, incredibly dense to people treating her bad that it forced Jenna and Conner to scream it to her face.
Setting - ★★Nothing much to say.
Writing Style - ★★★★Love they way Florence wrote character introspections. Feels like I'm in Keiko's head. She totally excels at it. The dialogues are on-point as well.
Characters - ★★★1. I know Keiko's purpose is supposed to wake up and adapt. I get it. But she is only able to actualize her realization when the book was already about to end. She was still the same lame doormat, especially when it comes to Audrey. Like how can you still call her your best friend when she dated someone who was being incredibly racist to you? I hate how Keiko didn't even discuss how incredibly harmful it was for her friend to switch up on her like that. Instead of a proper confrontation with Audrey to revamp and finally settle things as someone who's learning to grow out of her people-pleasing tendencies, she invites Audrey back into her home and allows her to judge Keiko for the decisions she made while they were separated. She was a coward until almost at the very end, when she finally realizes, in the most anticlimactic way that Audrey was a total bitch and a spoiled brat.
Coherence - ★★★I don't agree with Keiko's character choices but they made sense for a stoic, WAsian girl, whose world revolved around only three friends (+1 if we add Connor to the mix), and lacked the experience to differentiate a good friend from a bad one. I kind of wish we got more background about her that involves her family. She's the eldest sister and it was mentioned how her parents relied on her too much, but I didn't get to read about her being an overly responsible child. She went to Macy's theater rehearsal but that's about the most elderly sibling thing she's done for her throughout the storyline. She was always out and about, living a normal childhood, so I didn't really have it in me to connect with what her mother said about her. As much as she's supposedly a control freak (coined by Conner), she's none of that (?). I don't know if I'm even making sense.
Pacing - ★★★★Pacing isn't bad. It's medium and done well. Though the Audrey storyline was a bit dragged out with an anticlimactic resolution.
Dynamics - ★★★I'm not entirely in love with Keiko's relationship with Jenna and Macy. She only ever started reaching out for Jenna when she realized her fallout with Audrey was pretty serious. But prior to that, she chose Audrey for most of the time. She didn't interact much with Macy and was almost entirely like her mom—too preoccupied to even care. However, Keiko and Conner clicked for me instantly. They were good as friends and as romantic partners. Just sad he had to suffer being Keiko's second choice for the second time again. Glad, he's not anymore because he didn't deserve it. Took Keiko way too long, but it's forgivable.
Engagement - ★★★★I wasn't exactly engaged with the first arc of the story. I was daydreaming while reading—a talent I discovered just recently—so I had to reread some paragraphs all over. Either way, the story picked up quicker than expected and I was delighted with all the friendship drama. Wish the resolution was more satisfying.
“You don’t have to, you know. You’re allowed to pick whatever you want when it’s your turn. You don’t have to make everyone happy all the time.”
“Stop stalling, Conner Lassiter.”
He laughed softly. “I like the way you say my name.”
My breath caught.
Cute teenager stuff!“You said you could be friends with Audrey and me, but it’s obvious you can’t. You’ll choose Audrey every time, even though she treats you like dirt. If that’s what you really want, fine! I just want you to be happy. Don’t you?”
How it felt reading Keiko fuck up for the second time around:I choose you, Conner. I told Audrey. I know you’re mad at me, and I don’t blame you. But even if you never talk to me again, I still choose you.

Conner and I were like my spicy hot chocolate. The ingredients didn’t seem like they’d go together, but they did. And not everyone liked the blend. It was unique, special, and appreciated by only a few.
